Modesty
Date:
Channel: Saad Tasleem
File Size: 72.71MB
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AI Generated Summary ©
The speakers stress the importance of addressing the heart and bringing faith and modesty to solve problems in relationships with Allah. They stress the need to address the heart and bring models and assumptions to be made at work. The importance of shyness and acceptance in relationships is emphasized, along with the need for acceptance and acceptance in relationships. The speakers express gratitude towards their team and employees.AI Generated Transcript ©
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With that,
I would say I see some excitement on
camera. I see some excitement in the chat.
I am going to say we are sufficiently
warmed up.
I think we're about ready to do this,
guys. What do you think?
I think we need to talk about haya.
We need to talk about modesty. We're gonna
talk about that beautiful topic,
that topic that is an intrinsic portion. It
is the the character trait
of Islam. Right? The defining character trait of
Islam
is al Hayat as the prophet said.
So, I'll wait for, my beloved brother in
Sheikh Saad Taslim to come on camera. In
fact, I think I see the camera just
opened up. Let's see
if we can give this a spotlight here.
How are you?
I'm well. It's good to see you after
such a long time.
Great to see you too, Sheikh. Great to
see you too. We can't wait to hear
about the topic, and I know our time
is precious. I'm going to hand the floor
on over. Bismillah.
Bismillah.
So it's a topic of modalities.
This is a topic that,
I've been speaking about for a very long
time. I feel like a lot of times
when I get invited out to, especially, MSAs
and even different communities in Masjid, they're like,
you're young. Can you talk to our youth
about modesty and, you know, how to behave
with the opposite gender and this and that,
and, yeah, intermingling or mixing or whatever. Like,
this topic seems to always land,
on my shoulders. And so
I have spoken about it,
at length before as well. And and also
I teach a seminar called, trends in which
we speak about,
clothing, the fit of clothing. And in that,
the topic of modesty comes up as well
because one of the
principles when it comes to our clothing,
is that we wanna dress modestly. And so
we have to talk about what modesty really
is.
And over the years
of talking about modesty, I always have come
to the conclusion
that oftentimes the way we treat modesty, heyya,
is we try to put a Band Aid
on, like, a broken bone.
What I mean by that is, you know,
if you have a broken bone,
you know, you put a Band Aid on
it, it's not gonna do much. Visually,
it might appear like you're helping the problem,
but it's actually not doing anything. What needs
to be addressed is the bigger issue, which
is the bone itself. Like, the bone needs
to be set in place and put it
in a a castor or whatever it may
be. Like, I I don't I don't know
how to set bones, but whatever you have
to do to fix the bone itself, like,
that's what needs to be done. And so
when it comes to the issue of modesty
and and,
we oftentimes
look at the problem,
and how it is affecting our behavior, how
it is affecting our dress, and we wanna,
like, put these,
these Band Aids on it. So for example,
a parent,
wants their daughter or their son to dress
modestly.
And they'll say, listen. You need to wear
this and this and this, and you can't
wear this, and you need to do this
and do that.
Or
a a masjid is noticing that,
you know, the the the congregants and the
masjid,
men and women are not behaving modestly in
their
interaction with one another. Or you can substitute,
for a masjid, you can substitute an MSA,
or a gathering of Muslims. And they'll say,
okay. You know what? We need to have
very strict rules about how you need to
behave and and and you need to,
you know, barrier, and I'll talk about a
barrier in in a little bit, barrier in
in in the mission.
And so that
is almost like putting a band aid on
the problem because the the issue of is
the issue of the heart.
Is from the matters of our heart.
And if we don't solve the problem in
our heart,
then
as human beings,
if we don't feel
the need to be modest and we we
don't understand the wisdom of modesty. We don't
understand how it affects us and our relationship
with Allah.
If we don't find value
in in behaving modestly and acting modestly,
we're gonna find ways around whatever rules
someone may set up. Whether it be in
the household or in the masjid or wherever
else.
And so,
I know it feels good to to put
those band aids on and to say, you
know what? It because it gives the appearance
of solving a problem.
But if we really want this problem to
be solved, we need to look at the
heart. We need to address the heart. We
need to address what is happening within us,
and that is what dictates our behavior. And
this is why these issues, you know, the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
he mentioned this very clearly to us. He
said,
that in the body, there is a piece
of meat. If it is sound, if it
is okay, then the rest of the body
will be sound. However, said that if it
is ruined, then the rest of the body
will be ruined as well.
Certainly, that's the heart. I mean, if you
don't solve these problems in your heart, then
it's gonna ruin everything else. And for us,
when it comes to our behavior, in our
dress, in our speech, in our interaction, all
of these issues,
they stem from what is happening in our
heart. And and that is why the prophet,
mentioned that,
Haya is from our faith. It is from
our
iman. Why would we behave in a in
a in a modest way? Why would we
dress in a modest way? Why would we
talk in a modest way? Well, it all
goes back to our faith. The he said,
That modesty and faith
are 2 companions.
If
one is raised, then the other is raised.
And, likewise, the the the inverse of that,
or as
as, you know, as as scholars say, is
that if
isn't this there's not mentioned in the text,
but we understand that if one is lowered,
then the other is lowered as well.
Meaning, they have that type of symbiotic
relationship between the 2 of them. If our
iman goes up, our modesty goes up. And
if our modesty goes up, our iman goes
up. Then that's why people say, how do
I become more modest?
How do I,
increase my modesty?
Well, the obvious answer is the answer of
the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam that it is
combined.
They're a companion of
iman.
So we have to raise our iman.
He says that,
when the servant of Allah has certainty that
their lord is looking upon them,
then this will
and, you know, this is not the exact
word, but the meaning is that it will
force their hand. It will push them to
be modest. It will push the servant to
be modest with Allah because now it is
not about,
you know, what is happening just in my
worldly life, but it's about my relationship with
with Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, and that's why
for us, Al Haya Mil Al Iman. Haya
is from Iman. That is a central concept
for us when it comes to our,
modesty. And this is why Allah
when we know and understand that Allah is
looking upon us, Allah is with us in
his knowledge.
He is with you wherever you are.
Is all aware, all seeing of what you
do, a person who lives their life in
that way,
you don't actually have to set a lot
of rules for them. You don't have to
say, you know, do this and don't do
this and and and do that.
And this is why, you know, the issue
of
a barrier in the message. And you you
all know I don't like to talk about
controversial stuff, so that's why I'm mentioning the
the barrier in the in the message. I've
been to masjids
that have a barrier and a very, very
strict barrier. And I'm talking about, like,
men and women are in separate,
just complete separate areas. Right? And there's, you
know, Hamdah, some some masjid at least have,
like, a camera where the the women can
see the men,
because actually the women need to at least
be able to see the imam, by the
way. Because that is how they follow salah.
And that is why if you've ever been
to a Masjid,
and there's no,
the the women, the sisters cannot view the
imam at least, and the imam makes a
mistake, it's chaos.
I haven't experienced this, but my wife has
told me this. My mom,
she has she had used to mention this
to me. My sister has mentioned this to
me. A lot of women have mentioned to
me.
In that situation, I, you know, I usually
ask my wife, you know, in a case
like that, I'm like, you know, what happened?
You know, your man made a mistake. And
she goes,
it was disaster. Some women are in SEDJDA.
Some women are in, and some women are
doing this. So it's just, like, nobody knows
what they're doing. Right? And so and that's
a side point. I apologize for going on
that, David.
But there should at least be the the
women should at least be able to see
the imam what the imam is is doing.
But I've been in those messages where there's
no contact. Right?
And
that's fine while they're in the masjid.
But if tarbia is not given to the
community,
then as soon as these young men and
women step out of that very con very
confined environment,
they're gonna just find ways to interact
in in impermissible ways outside of the Masjid.
And I've also been to Masajid
where there's no barrier.
And I'm not, by the way, I'm not
I'm not I'm not for 1 or the
other. Right? This is not the point of
my talk here. It's not point of me
saying that. I know a lot of people
are thinking, that I'm giving my opinion and
having a barrier or not. I don't have
an opinion. I think every community needs to
ask their imam and fit the needs of
their community. That's my official answer. So I'm
only taking questions about a barrier at the
end. But I've been to I've been to
I've been to communities where there's no barrier.
But the imam
gave such terbia.
He educated the community in such a way
that I saw these brothers and sisters, and
they are the most in their behavior. That
I haven't even seen this in, like I
said,
you know, Masajid communities and and even, like,
societies,
or societies around the world communities around the
world that are very cut off, like the
the genders are cut off from one another.
I haven't seen that level of modesty even
there. Right? Why? Because the imam and the
community made a special effort to make sure
that they
work on the hearts of the people, Understand
that they have a responsibility to Allahu Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala. And that is why, you know,
when I give talks on gender interaction, I'm
like, look. I can give you twenty rules
of how to interact with the opposite gender.
But rule number 1 of sincerity with Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, if that is not met,
then none of it matters.
Because there's always gonna be a loophole. Right?
Some people talk about
the issue of khalwa. You know, the prophet
he said,
that a man is not alone with a
woman, except the third of them is the
shaytan.
Right? And this tells us
in our deen, a man is not supposed
to be alone with a woman that is
not.
Right? But this is very clear. There's there's
no, there's no,
there's not something which ambiguous. There should be
no khalua.
If a person is not fearing of Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala, if they're not conscious of
Allah,
then they'll even find loopholes in in that.
What happens when it comes to communication?
Yeah. You know, they're not a man of
women. They're not in a room alone together,
but maybe they'll find ways to be in
a conversation together. You know? And nowadays with,
you know, social media and,
you know, WhatsApp and messaging and so on
and so forth, people will find a way
to to to a loophole for that for
that rule if the heart is not, taken
care of. And that is why our dean
teaches us that beauty comes from
Haya. Beauty comes from it's not a restrictive
and oftentimes when we think of haya, we
think of it as something restrictive. When we
think of modesty, nice to do this exercise
in my class. I say, I'm gonna say
a word and you tell me what comes
to your mind.
And, I say modesty,
and people used to say,
hijab
covering up,
you know, restricted,
confined, so on and so forth. And that
says very interesting that we have this association
with modesty,
which I have no doubt this comes from
the shayaton because one of the tricks of
the shayaton, by the way,
is to,
do negative associations with good things. Meaning, take
something good and make it appear bad. And
does the opposite as well. He takes, bad
things and he makes them appear good to
us so that we may fall fall into
it. But this negative association, definitely the shayat
an encourages us. In
in our deen, there's a positive association
with Haya. The prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
he said.
Haya is not played in placed. A modesty
is not placed in anything
except that it makes it beautiful.
Right? When we think of modesty,
we don't often think about beauty.
Right? We think about aiding and restricting beauty
and so on and so forth. It's just
that this is a beauty that is pleasing
to Allahu's and actually it is pleasing to
our
as well. It is pleasing to our nafs.
It is pleasing to our soul
because the standards of beauty and what is
considered beautiful,
gets perverted in in society. And this is
why we begin to be, affected by we
we begin to define beauty,
in in ways that are actually not pleasing
to our soul, but our
our understanding of beauty or our constant of
beauty has been perverted and changed.
Where somehow now we live in a society
apologize for the for the meme. You know,
we live in a society, but we live
in a society where
nakedness
is associated
with beauty.
And if you look at the fitrah, right,
you look at our nefs, our nature,
it is the opposite of that. If a
person was left alone, they were not affected
by society, they were not affected by anyone.
When they would see
nakedness, they would turn away. They would shy
away. Because the nuffs says this is odd.
It's something very, very private. This is not
something that should be out and about. Like,
everyone should not be exposed to. The NFS
understands this.
But as society changes,
we begin to associate something that is that
we would not normally like. Our nafs would
not our soul, our our self naturally. The
is what we naturally like. Naturally, we would
not like that,
but it gets changed. And this is why
it's very interesting,
you know, in in the trend seminar, we
talk about
nakedness.
And, we mentioned this opinion of of some
of our scholars that say that
even if a person is alone in their
home or in their in their in their
room,
they should not and I know it sounds
weird to to say this, and I apologize.
They should not just walk around naked. Right?
Now are they doing something which is? No.
It's not. You know, nobody's looking at you.
You're by yourself. You're in your room. And
I and I I know this sounds really,
really weird, and I apologize for this.
But if you're alone,
right, no. It's not Haram to walk around
naked, but some of our scholars say it
is.
It is disliked. It is discouraged. Why?
Because it chips away at our sense of
modesty.
It chip chips away at our sense of,
of covering up,
of of being modest with with Allahu
And this is why, you know, we have
we know Earthman
was this companion who had a very elevated
sense of modesty, that even the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam recognized that this is a person
whose whose modesty was at a as was
at a very high level. We had this
incident mentioned, in Sahil Bukhari,
in which the prophet sallallahu alaihi said sorry.
Sahil Muslim,
hadith in which, this incident takes place where
the prophet salallahu alaihi wasalam is, lying in
his bed,
in in his apartment
and his thigh is uncovered. Right? Not his,
private area,
but his thigh. His thigh is uncovered.
Or a portion of his thigh, we can
say. And Aisha radiAllahu an ashi says that
he's sitting in which he's laying down on
on on, on his bed.
And Abu Bakr radiAllahu anwalks in. And the
prophet,
Aisha,
she says that,
doesn't change the way he's sitting. Then she
says some time passed and, you know, Abu
he walks in
and stays in the same state,
and he talks to him for some time.
And then some time goes by, and then
walks
in. And the president doesn't change the way
he's sitting, meaning his thigh is still exposed.
And then,
some time passes by an earthman
walks in.
And the prophet,
when he hears that earth man is coming,
he sits up and he covers his thigh.
And
Aisha as we know, she was very curious
and,
pleased with her. Because of her, we learned
so much.
She asked a question that we're now all
thinking, which is he says to the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
I noticed
that when Abu Bakr walked in, you didn't
change the way you were sitting.
When
Umar
walked in, you didn't change the way you
were sitting.
But when Uthman
walked in, you covered yourself, you covered your
thigh, and you sat up. And the prophet
he said,
He said, should I not be
shy
in front of the one
whom the angels are shy in front of?
Right? This is a level of modesty that
had an elevated high level of modesty. And,
you know, this hadith, by the way, comes
under the the issues. It is brought up
under the issue of
is the
part of men's or not? Right? And I
don't wanna get into
a a thick
a thick discussion here. If you're interested in
this topic,
check out the trends seminar that I teach.
And, actually, we go over this in the
faith essentials as well in, the Al Maghuder
portal. You can check that out if you
want the details of the and the regarding
that. That's not the point here. The point
here is that if we understand
modesty,
then we would be aware of our nakedness
to a heightened level.
Right? And that is why the prophet,
it clicked for him, Uthman
came.
He covered up his thigh
That is an elevated level of modesty.
And and and that, my brothers and sisters,
the the beauty about modesty and is
that it is contagious.
When we are modest, it affects other people
as well, and it creates an environment of
modesty.
This is very interesting, the the story of
Musa alaihis salam
when he went to the well of Madyan.
Allah
tells us this message with, Qasas,
of how he interacted,
with the 2 women. Allah
says,
when Musa alayhi salam, when he came to
the well of Madin,
he
found a group of people there.
Basically, what they were doing was they were
getting water from the well, and they were
giving that water to their animals.
And then
He found 2 women
who were there, but they were holding back.
They weren't able to give water to their
animals.
And he addressed them. He said,
he
said, what is the issue? Like, what issue
are you facing?
They
said the 2 of them said,
They said, we cannot water our animals until
basically
the other shepherds are done. Right? So there's
a bunch of men now. They're crowding the
area.
You know, it's it's probably getting rough. They're
they're they're they're
getting water out of the well, and they're
giving,
water to the animals, and there's animals there,
and there's men there, and so on and
so forth.
And these 2 women, they say,
you know, we wanna give water to our
animals as well, but we can't do so
because it's crowded by men. And they say,
What does that mean? Our father is an
old man, but what that means is what
is understood here is that normally our father
would do this. Like, our father would be
here among the men going into the getting
water from the well and giving water to
the animals,
but he's old. He he doesn't have the
ability to do it. We have to do
it. And, you know, so we're we're unable
to do it right now.
And Allah
tells us,
He,
he gave he basically when he saw that
they're having this problem, he got water for
their he brought water for their animals, then
he retreated to the shade.
And then,
he made dua
to
Allah
He prayed, he made dua. He said, my
lord, I'm truly desperately in need of whatever,
provisions, whatever good you can bestow upon me.
And then
the 2 women come to Musa alayhis salam.
So what sorry. 1 of the women come
to Musa alayhis salam.
Allah tells us that one of the women,
they come to Musa alaihis salam. They wanna
speak to him. But how do they approach
approach Musa alayhis salaam? They approach Musa alayhis
salaam with,
right, with modesty.
And then they said to him,
They said our father is calling you, inviting
you to reward you,
to give you a reward to reward you
for the water that you have provided for
our animals. Now
in this whole in these few verses,
where is the modesty of of Musa alaihis
salaam?
It is not literally spelled out, but if
you contemplate these verses, it becomes very, very
clear.
Some people say, well, he,
was direct and to the point.
He didn't go to them.
And say, hi. How are you? How's it
going? What's up? What's going on? Where are
you from?
He just saw that these 2 women are
in distress,
and he said, what's going on? They explained
their problem to him, and he went and
he helped. After he helped them, he didn't
go and continue the conversation and say, where
are you from? And this is that. And
even Subhanahu noticed that,
the 2 women, they they said,
they said, They said our father is an
old man. He didn't make
after that. He didn't say, well,
okay. So he's old. What's wrong with him?
Where does he live? He He didn't even
ask any more questions about their father. Right?
He didn't get into this long, drawn out
conversation.
He understood what's happening. He gave water to
the, provide he he fulfilled their need, and
then he didn't continue any conversation. He went
and retreated,
to the shade, and he made the a'
to Allahu
even though Musa alaihi salaam was in need
right now. He could have said, listen. I
did this for you. Can you help me
out? Because Musa alaihi salaam, when he came
to Madien,
he came with nothing. And some of the
scholars of the city even mentioned that he
didn't even have shoes. So he truly had
nothing nothing nothing to his name. He came
desperately,
in that's why he said,
He said, my lord, I'm desperately in need
of whatever you can bestow upon me. Right?
He he came with nothing. He could have
asked them for something, but he did not.
So that's one. On top of that, if
you reflect upon these verses,
it becomes clear to us
that his modesty is is understood by the
modesty of the 2 women. Because now when
the women wanted to speak to him, how
did they approach him? They approached him. Allahu's
Panawatu'ala tells us,
one of them came to him.
She was walking with modesty.
Where did this come from? This came from
the modesty of Musa alaihis salam. Because Musa
alaihis salam had created the environment
of modesty.
And this is why all it takes
is one person
in the interaction to be modest, and it
will affect the other person.
If one person is
conscious of Allah,
knows that Allah is watching them, knows that
they have to answer to Allah. They are
checking their intentions. And this is one thing
I always tell young brothers and sisters when
you're talking to you know, often we ask,
like, how much are we allowed to talk?
What are we allowed to ask? You know,
how much is you know, the, people say,
like, keep the conversation formal. Okay. Who defines
formal? Right? Because in one environment, something may
be formal and another environment may not be
formal. In one,
society, something may be formal. In another society,
something may not be formal depending on where
you live. People talk in different ways.
So there's a lot of there can be
a lot of gray area there. Well,
if you are questioning yourself and asking yourself,
what is my intention behind this conversation?
Do I want to please Allah?
Or if I'm talking to somebody of the
opposite gender and you know what? I want
them to like me.
I want them,
to enjoy this conversation. I want to get,
I I wanna feel good. I want the
other person to feel good. Now our intentions
are messed up. Right? And so that is
the question we need to be asking ourselves.
Like, what do I want out of this
conversation? Is it simply I need to ask
this person a question and this and that
it's done? Or
I want this person to like me. Right?
And I want this person to feel a
certain way, and I feel a certain way.
And then now we're getting into now the
reality of what is happening in the heart,
and then we need to seek refuge in
Allah
from having those feelings and thoughts. And now
we center ourselves with what is correct with
Allahu'shawnaahu ta'ala rectify our intention and continue the
conversation
in that way. But because Musa alaihis salaam
was modest, of course, it had an effect
on the 2 women as well. And that
is why, as I said, it all it
takes is one person
to be modest, and it'll have an effect
on the other people. And I always tell
parents even to Hannah love.
It's one thing to,
you know, tell your children to behave in
a modest way, to talk in a modest
way, to dress in a modest way. It's
another thing to to practically show them what
it means to be modest in our in
our interaction.
All of us,
I'm sure, and this is an uncomfortable thing
to to think about and talk about. All
of us, we can think back to our
childhood,
and we can remember
how,
you know, my father used to talk to
other women, How my mom used to talk
to other men, and that, of course, had
an effect upon us. Right? And so now
that we are and I'm speaking to the
parents who are listening right now. Now that
we are parents, we need to think about
our children. When we are interacting with the
opposite gender, what are our children seeing? Are
our children seeing an embodiment
of,
of what
Haya in Islam is supposed to look like?
Are they learn instead of us saying, you
know, you should do this and you shouldn't
do that. Are they
seeing a living example
of modesty
in different circumstances? We can talk to our
kids all we want, and it's good to
talk to our kids. But
showing them through experience means we show them
that when we're in the grocery store, how
do we act? When we go to the
Masjid, how do we act? I've heard kids
say, you know, people act a certain I've
seen my I've heard kids say, like, my
parents in the Masjid, they're all religious and
they act a certain way, but where when
they're out in the bank or the grocery
store or whatever, they're not the same way.
They'll never say that to their parents, but
I've heard them say this. They'll some of
them are feel comfortable
comfortable enough to say it to me. Right?
And if they're saying it to me, this
is probably, like, 5% of what's going on
in their head. Right? Because children think about
this stuff. They they they think about
then this happens internally.
You know? How is my why is my
dad behaving in this way, and why is
my mom behaving in this way? And so
if we are if we are living that
example, then our children see how we behave
in all different circumstances. How we dress, how
we interact, how we talk, all that has
an effect on our children.
And so
I ask Allah
to make us good role models,
for our children, for our communities,
for those,
who even even for for non Muslims.
SubhanAllah, I'll just share with you,
one last story and I'll end it there.
Recently, I was in Florida
and,
at, one of the fundraisers is an Islamic
Relief fundraiser.
And,
there's a woman,
who's running for
congress,
in Florida.
And I had happened to to to to
learn about her online,
that she is
anti
Zionist. She's she's she's Jewish,
but she's pro Palestine, and she's she's, she's,
anti Zionism.
And, she's running against,
the congressman,
or the congresswoman from Florida who is actually
very, very, very pro
Zionist,
pro Israel.
And so, so I I came across her,
and I was like, I just wanted to
say hi to her. I wanna say, look.
I'm I'm, I'm glad you're doing what you're
doing. Keep speaking out.
It's good that we have someone running against
a a very pro Zionist,
you know, congresswoman.
And, that's all I wanna say. And it's
amazing to paddle up. I I I I
approached her, and she said, hello. I said,
hello. And she said,
and she she looked at me out there.
She goes, do you do you shake hands?
I said, no. I don't. And she was,
no problem. And she said, this is my
I don't know. Somebody who works with her,
a man. And she said, whatever. And he
shook my hand.
And I shook his hand. And I'm like,
someone educated her. She met a mus without
a doubt, she met a Muslim,
a Muslim man or a Muslim woman, and
they explained to her the modesty of Islam,
how Muslim behave. The touch, like that's a
hard and fast rule. Right? Like, not being
alone with the opposite gender. That's a hard
and fast rule.
Not touching. Someone who's not to us. That's
a hard and fast rule.
So someone explained that to her and looked
the effect that it had upon her. And
I noticed that this interaction
could have been an uncomfortable interaction,
but now it was a comfortable and at
the same
a modest interaction as well. To make us
role models and examples
and and and to,
forgive our shortcomings
and to grant us
that
makes us,
like the companions of the prophet
Thank you so much for
shining so much light on the topic of
from many different angles, both practically
and, and I love a couple of the
comments and get really encapsulate,
what you
shared. One, sister Ruhi said we need to
do we need to do the groundwork first.
Right? We need to really build that foundation
within our hearts and within ourselves.
Then the external things will be a natural
result of that.
And then, sister Herlia mentioned, there is no
barrier big enough to stop someone from doing
something wrong. I really like those comments that
it just really That's awesome. Gives us that
that mindset. Right? There were a couple of
questions, Sheikh, if you have a couple of
moments for us.
Sure. And if anyone has any questions, please,
put them in the chat. We'll try to
take a couple. The first one, was that
was mentioned to me, was asking
regarding
the issue of the hijab. They were asking,
is the hijab, or where is the hijab
mentioned in the Quran? I looked for it,
but never got answers to it.
Okay. There's a long answer and a short
answer. We obviously don't have time for the
long answer. If you want the long answer,
I go into this topic in detail
in my trends seminar,
and it's also covered in Faith Essentials for
Al Maghrib. So you can check it out
there as well.
Is is hijab,
is it mentioned in the Quran that women
have to wear hijab?
That women have to wear
hijab.
If you hear someone making that claim,
they're actually right.
Now before I before I continue, let me
finish.
The word hijab
is not mentioned.
But what is mentioned is the word.
So in our,
in in our time,
we when we think
of headscarf, we use the word hijab.
Right?
So
so so that so someone can make that,
that argument and say in the Quran, if
you look at the Quran, it doesn't say
hijab. The word hijab hasn't been mentioned as
being obligatory or that women have to wear
hijab.
That is technically correct,
but the word that is used for the
hijab is.
Right? Because,
that is a type of halibut. So
if someone said it is not mentioned that
a headscarf has to be worn by women,
then that's incorrect because the headscarf has been,
has been mentioned. And, actually, I was going
to go over,
some of the ayat of of hijab,
in my talk today, but we kinda ran
out of time. Maybe I can just mention
them real quick because there's actually a larger
point there.
Few different places I'll just mention where, it
is mentioned Surat Anur.
In Surat Anur, Allah says,
Tell the believing men. And now right here,
pause. You gotta think to yourself,
we're talking about hijab.
Why are we talking about men? And it's
very important that we talk about men. Okay?
And I'll I'll tell you why. So Allah
says, tell the believing,
meaning tell the believing men to
avert from their vision or their gaze, meaning
turn away. So from the from from what
they look at, they should from from that,
they should look away, turn away, and they
should guard their private pie parts
that is pure for them.
Allah is all aware of what they do.
Now this is the heart part.
The heart part. The part of our heart.
When When it comes to modesty, the dress
is coming, but this is the heart. Now
as we said in the talk, if the
heart is not taken care of, then then
the the the dress will will get affected
as well. So Allah says, tell the believing
men
to avert their gaze,
that is pure for them. Allah is all
aware of what they do. And then Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala addresses the the the women.
It's very interesting that Allah begins with the
men and not with the women. But in
the next verse, Allah mentions the the women,
and tell the believing women,
and
tell the believing women to turn away or
to look away, to avert part of their
gaze,
and to guard their private parts. And then
Allah says,
and they should not
expose their zeena,
their adornment ex except that which is apparent
from it. We get into detail regarding these
verses, in my in my seminar,
but scholars talk about what is the apparent
zena of a,
the apparent
beauty of a a woman versus the hidden
beauty. And then Allah
says,
and they should wrap a portion of their
head covers over their chest.
Now
I just wanna give you, a visual of
what this looks like, or I'll try to
give you a visual because oftentimes,
this verse and these verses get misunderstood.
What Allahu is
addressing here is a practice that that used
to happen at the time,
of the companions where
women would actually wear.
They would wear a headscarf that would cover
their head.
But if you've seen the the modern,
it's basically like one piece of cloth that
has,
like, a hole in it. Right? Y'all know
what I'm talking about? I think some of
the the women may know. So it's it's
just has a it's like a
a a piece of cloth. It has a
hole in it. So they wrap it over
and they put their face through the through
the hole. Right? And they're therefore, their hair
gets covered, everything gets covered, and then the
rest falls on them.
Allah is trying so what the women at
that time, what they would do is that
they would wear the and
then they would take the area upon their
chest and they would throw it back.
So their chest would be uncovered.
Right? And so Allah
is saying that they should take that
that has been thrown back and throw it
over their chest. Right? So this is what
is being mentioned here. And so here is
the the verse talking about and there are
other places in the Quran as well.
But the word to look for in the
Quran is.
Right?
Their Their
has been mentioned.
And that's why it is important that when
we study the Quran,
and this is a principle when it comes
to and understanding the Quran,
that we have to look at the meanings
of words
when they were revealed, not in our times.
Right? That so because if we were to
now start interpreting the Quran
with how we understand words today, we can
change the meaning of any word.
Someone could say, you know, Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala says,
establish the prayer. Well, salah
to me means,
I don't know. Let's say somebody says, to
me, salah means meditating.
Right? So that means that Allah is telling
me to meditate. Well, that's your understanding of
the word today. But what how did the
prophet and the companion understand the word salah?
So we always go back to the understanding
of the prophet and the companions
of salah. And that is why you cannot
separate the sunnah of the from the Quran.
Because
the the sunnah is what teaches us how
to live the Quran and how to understand
the meanings and and the obligations,
and what is mentioned in the Quran. Sorry.
A little bit of a long answer to,
to that question.
Very comprehensive. I think you you made up
for what you plan to talk about in
in the session.
We have so many other questions, Sheikh, but
we don't we don't have time.
Subhanallah.
I do encourage everyone to, please check out,
if, trends ever becomes
available again, definitely check it out. Also, the
faith essentials portal does go over,
a a abbreviated version of some of these
concepts as well.
Shakhrat, any other projects or things going on
with you that we can talk about?
That's a well yeah. So I just mentioned,
Ramadan, I'm doing daily
juz reflection.
So pick 1 verse for every juz and
just do, like, a 1 minute reflection.
I wanted to pick something that I can
be consistent over with, like, my crazy schedule.
So I was like, at least I'm gonna
do that, one eye up per day. That's
1 minute. It's on my it's on my
Instagram. It's on my YouTube channel as well.
So just check that out and share it
with people. Share it with with as many
people as you can.
And, yeah, that that's all I mentioned for
for right now.
Wonderful. Sounds great. Sounds great.
Thank you so much for your time today.
We appreciate you.
Good to be here. It's good to to
be back online live with everyone.
Take care.
Yeah. It wouldn't be Ramadan 360 without Sheikh
Sadataslim, Alhamdulillah.
Couple quick points before we move into the
next portion. We know we're not done yet.
Thank you all for being with us for
the first half. And Sheikh
Saad has his
his daily reflections. Check those out.
Many of our instructors as well are going
to be with us in a in a
very special session. There's a webinar coming up
on Saturday. Hopefully everyone's aware of it. Ramadan
360.orgforward/webinar,
where we are going to be gathering similar
to what we did last weekend, but the
topic this time is going to be stories
of accepted du'a.
We're going to have doctor Waleed Basuni, doctor
Omar Suleiman, chef Suleiman Hani, Sheikh Amar Ashukri,
Mostari Yasmin, Mujahid, and Mostari Taemia
Zubair who's coming up for us in a
moment. So please check it out starting at
1 PM
EST
But go into the portal and check your
local times. I know there's some, I think
there's some daylight saving change coming in Europe.
There's some things like that. So check your
local time zone in the portal. We'd love
to see you join us for that.
Also, we wanted to just quickly talk about
the donation campaign,
that's starting Saturday night. So if you go
to almagrib.org/donate,
and you wanna support
activities and events such as this, all the
teaching that we're doing, the classes,
every program that Almagrib
offers, that's going to be set up to
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Continue to support us there. And also real
quick, let me know in the chat who
has seen Sheikh Amar's series on YouTube?
Who's following that?
Let us know in the comments if you're
following that session. Alhamdulillah. It's been so nice.
Please continue to check that out. It is
at Almagrib Institute TV
at YouTube. So search that up. I know
one of our amazing students in the comments
is going to share the link there as
well. But we do encourage you to connect
to the names of Allah through that series.
Mogrib is doing so much. It's hard to
keep up. It's hard to keep track sometimes.
But you're keeping track because you're here.
So we're we're doing something right.
Let's go ahead with that reminder,
and let's start the Quran
reflect session Insha'Allah Ta'ala.
I would like to welcome
our
Tamia,
Zubair. Assalamu alaikum.
How are you doing today? Alhamdulillah. Everything is
wonderful. How are you? Alhamdulillah.
I just realized that this big thing on
the side of your
screen is actually a microphone.
Indeed it is. Yeah. Masha'Allah.
Nice and big microphone. Masha'Allah.
Yes. Gotta make sure they hear us.
Alhamdulillah. All right. Let's begin.
So the topic of hayah is
a topic that
I think a lot of people don't like
to
talk about,
or at least,
I know that I mean, I have witnessed
that if God forbid someone
points out that someone is talking too loudly,
or that they're coming across as rude or
that their hijab is, you know, not appropriate.
It's it's see through or that or that
their shirt is short or that their pants
are tight, people get offended.
We get offended
a lot. If somebody
were to,
advise us, remind us,
to be to have more Haya.
Now, of course,
when you remind someone, when you advise someone,
you have to do it in the right
way. Right?
But,
that aside,
when we're on the receiving end of, you
know, any advice related to Haya,
even if it's our own mother
or our own spouse,
or our own children
who may be telling us, you know, mom,
your hair is showing.
Mom, your your your scarf is see through.
We say it's none of your business.
Right? You you you don't say anything to
me. This is this is my,
you know, my,
you know, matter
between me and
my Lord.
So
this is something that people don't don't like
to talk about. But the
the thing is that Hayat
is
related to our iman. It is not just
a part of our iman.
It is
it is a companion of iman.
It is connected with iman. The prophet
told us that if
iman leaves,
Haya leaves.
Right? And if Haya leaves, iman leaves.
Meaning, they they they both stay together,
and if one of them leaves,
the other also leaves.
So haya is very, very important
in our
faith, and it's it's necessary that we begin
to think of it in a more positive
way.
Now we see that the word Haya occurs
4 times in the Quran in the form
Alright? To to have shyness.
Now linguistically
speaking,
is to
avoid something.
Alright?
And it is described as the
shrinking of the soul. Alright? When from, you
know, on on your in the inside, you
feel uncomfortable,
and you you avoid
what you think is
shameful, what you think is disgraceful.
Like, for example, if your friend dares you,
alright,
to scream out in public
that I am crazy, you would be shy
to do that because you you know that
this is something disgraceful. You know that this
is something shameful.
So haya is a sense of shame.
Alright? It is it is honest modesty.
And so it's the opposite of shamelessness.
And it is derived from the word hayat
and hayat means life.
And the connection over here is that the
more
hayat, the more
modesty a person has, the more alive
they are.
Alright?
Because
being civilized,
being cultured,
what does that do? It makes you avoid
what is disgraceful.
So the ulama say that without hayaq,
without modesty, a person is like a wild
beast.
And really, if you think about it, animals
do not have any kind of hayat whatsoever.
Right? Even if you have a pet,
that pet, any could be your cat, could
be sitting next to you,
grooming itself. Right? And you're like, come on,
dude. Not here. Not on my lap. Not
next to me. Please go somewhere else and
and, you know, clean yourself or groom yourself.
Right?
The animals
fight each other, growl. You know, they attack
each other,
groom themselves,
you know,
even mate
in in front of others.
Right?
So the more,
cultured,
civilized a person is, the more,
the more shyness they have. And Ibn Khayyim
said that if it was not for this
quality,
then
a person
would never be hospitable to a guest.
They would never keep a promise. They would
never take care of anyone's needs.
They would never fulfill a trust.
They would never avoid what is obscene. They
would never cover their their their aura, their
their private parts.
So it is because of haya
that people have the decency
to respect each other.
Right? To,
to, you know, take care of each other
and to abstain from, you know, what is
considered shameful.
Now one important distinction is that haya is
not hajal.
Hajal,
hajim lam,
is is meekness,
alright, that basically causes a person to be,
overly
conscious of people, alright,
because of which they're too embarrassed
to do what is right
or to to say what is right, to
even ask a question.
Alright? So modesty
is not
the opposite of,
confidence.
No.
In, Yenny sometimes we think that to be
modest means that you're not confident.
Right? Or or or that you you you
are very weak.
No. Haya,
you know, it's this kind of weakness to
to lack confidence, to be a coward, that
is Jibun.
Right? And the prophet
sought refuge with Allah against Jibun.
Right? In in that dua, the prophet
asked Allah to protect him from and
also from from fear that you're so afraid
of people that you don't,
you you don't have the confidence to ask
a question or or to do what is
right. And this type of haya we see,
the the negative kind,
or
is actually negated,
from Allah
in the Quran. So in Surat Al Baqarah,
ayah 26, Allah says,
That Allah is not shy to present the
example of a mosquito
or even something that is less than that.
In Suratul Ahzab verse number 53, Allah says,
will Allahu layastahimin
al haqq. Allah is not shy of the
truth.
Alright?
So haya,
the kind of haya that Allah
wants us to have. The kind of haya
that the prophet salallahu alaihi wa sallam,
taught us to have, that he exemplified, that
he showed.
That type of Haya is all good.
Why?
Because it
prevents you from doing what is wrong.
It prevents you from saying what is wrong.
It holds you back from
disobeying Allah.
And this is why when it comes to
the different types of haya,
the ulama say that there's,
a kind of haya that you have from
other people.
Right? Because of which
you don't
shout at them and you don't, you know,
say,
the, you know, dirty words in front of
them. Right? Your speeches
is is good. You don't burp out loud
in front of them.
You don't, you know, as as a woman,
you don't giggle, laugh out loud in front
of men.
Right? So this is a a kind of
modesty that is with people.
But there is a kind of modesty that
is also with Allah,
that
you are too shy to disobey Allah,
that you are even
shy to think certain thoughts because you know
that Allah knows
what you're thinking.
So you're careful about as in hadith, we
learned that the the haqq of hayah, the
the the right
the the the hayah that Allah deserves from
you,
the modesty that Allah deserves from you is
that you guard what's in the head
and that you guard what's in the stomach,
what you're eating.
Right? So there's a kind of from people.
There's also a kind of from
Allah
and there's also a kind of with oneself
with oneself.
That even in your privacy, when you're alone,
you don't disobey Allah.
So there there's different types of Haya. Right?
And then there's
another,
you know, division. Alright?
The ulama say that there's a kind of
hyat that is fitri,
that is instinctual.
Alright?
Like, for example,
a person is naturally
shy to expose their body.
Alright? But we know that the fitra can
actually
get corrupt.
So it happens with people that they're not
shy
to, you know, say obscene words, to uncover
their bodies,
to, you know, do things that that,
are
are supposed to be shameful.
We know that when the fitra gets corrupt,
people
lose this kind of shyness as well. And
I think this is very important because
a lot of Muslims feel guilty
that
I'm supposed to have haya. I'm supposed to
have modesty, but I I don't feel anything.
You know? Like, for example,
I I know that, you know, a a
a lot of sisters share this with me
that there's there's nothing from their heart that
tells them to cover.
They they don't feel
shy
to, you know, uncover
their
their heads, for example, in front of others.
So is is this a problem?
So the thing
is that there is also another type of
haya, which is which
is acquired.
Alright? And this is haya, modesty, that is
faith based.
Even if the whole world tells you
that, you know, you can dress like this.
You can say this. You can do this.
It's not immodest. This is fun. This is
normal.
Alright?
But what does our religion
define Hayat as?
Right? So we have to acquire that.
And this is the kind of haya that
prevents
a Muslim
from committing what is forbidden out of the
fear of Allah.
Alright? And this is, of course, in proportion
to one's iman.
The more a person's iman increases
with time, their haya,
their modesty
also increases.
And and and this is something so beautiful
because
haya is not just in your clothes.
Is not just in your gaze.
Is also in what you listen to.
Is also in how you talk to your
friends, how you talk to your children, how
you talk to your spouse.
Right? So,
this is so beautiful that the more a
person's iman increases,
right, which increases with good deeds, like, for
example, you recite more Quran, you pray more
salah, what will happen as a result of
that? Your consciousness of Allah will in increase.
As a result of which, your speech will
improve. You will be too shy
to yell, you know, obscene words right after
reciting the Quran.
You see that? So with iman,
your hayah will also increase.
Now in the Quran, we see that hayah
is emphasized in many different ways. Alright? It
may have only been mentioned 4 times,
but it is emphasized in many different ways.
First of all, we see that Allah
prohibits indecency.
Alright?
Allah
tells us in Surat Al Aghaf, ayah 28,
that
Allah does not command what is obscene,
what is indecent.
In Suratul Nahal, ayah 90, we learned
the ayah that we learned yesterday
Allah orders you that you should be just
and that you should,
do
and that you should give to the relatives.
And Allah prohibits
you from
indecency,
from fashah,
and also from wrongdoing and oppression.
Then we see that in the Quran,
Allah commands us with different rulings related to
proper clothing,
not only proper clothing, but also guarding our
eyes, guarding our thoughts, guarding our speech.
Right? So for example, in the in Surat
Al Araw, verse 26,
Allah
mentions
that
that the clothing of piety is is better.
And imam and imam al Ghazali explained that
libasut taqwa
is haya.
Anyone is the the clothes that you wear,
right, that cover your body, but you should
also have haya, modesty in the way that
you carry yourself.
And if you're wearing clothes that are properly
covering your aura, right, your nakedness,
they're completely Sharia compliant.
Alright?
But in your
manners, in the way that you're carrying yourself,
you are arrogant.
Right? You're belittling others. You're pushing them.
Then
Allah says,
To have modesty
is is is important.
Right? It it it is good.
Then we see,
both men and women have been told to
lower their gazes, right, and to cover their
private parts.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala also tells the wives
of the prophet
by extension, all believing women
that when you talk to men, then
then do not be too friendly,
in in your speech in the sense that
you are,
you know,
you know, being very,
sweet, you can say.
Don't do that,
because this is contrary to modesty. And then
we see in the Quran so many examples
of,
righteous
or or righteous people is given,
are given,
and and these, righteous men and women exhibited
beautiful modesty.
We have the example of Yusuf alaihis salam,
right, who
who was so modest in the face of
such open open fitna.
Right? Such open,
vulgarity.
Right? He was so modest over there. We
have the example of Mariam alaihis salam in
the Quran about how when the angel appeared
to her in the form of a man,
immediately,
she said,
Right? She didn't say, who are you? What's
your name? You know, no conversation. Nothing.
Immediately, she asks Allah to protect her. Right?
And then we also have the example of
the the
the 2 sisters,
right,
who,
whom Musa
met. Right? And one of them, she came
walking, alastihiya,
walking with,
shyness.
And the way that she was walking, it
was very modest.
So shyness is not something negative.
It is not something that makes you weak.
It is something modesty, good modesty is something
that makes you beautiful
in in the sight of Allah.
It brings dignity to a person,
and it,
it keeps them away
from disobeying Allah.
And it,
leads them to
respecting
other people,
and and, and also respecting
oneself.
So let's hear from you now, your time
to reflect.
Alright. Bismillah.
Rahud,
go ahead.
I shared before the story when I had
to have the surgery. So when they told
me to have the surgery, I asked them
I wanted everybody to be female
that was gonna be involved. The surgeon was
male, but I couldn't help that, but I
wanted everybody female.
So all the staff was female, and they
said nobody's ever done this before. Nobody's asked
for a female staff ever.
And I told them I wanted my hijab.
They said, well, it's on your neck, so
we can't have you keep it. But they
let me keep it up until the surgery,
then they put a shower cap on me
during the surgery. Mhmm. Because it had to
be something that was sterile.
And then as soon as the surgery finished,
they put the hijab back on me. Mhmm.
So when you wanna be respected for your
modesty,
people were will respect you for it as
well.
And everybody in the hospital was talking about
they wanted to come see me. Are you
the person that did this? Are you the
person that did this? So.
You know?
And see, with you doing that,
you're making it easier for,
other Muslim sisters as well.
Sonya, go ahead.
So,
modestly, when I think modestly, I think about
the the teacher because there are some teacher
that they're so
that,
they say, oh, I know a lot and
you don't know a lot. But
sometime, it's just about
modesty
if,
in remind me the story of,
Musa and the rare.
Sorry for my pronunciation. Sorry. Musa and?
Musa'an in the throat of, of.
Okay. Yeah.
I can say it correctly. So sorry. In
in Suratul Kahaf. Right?
Yeah. Yeah. Musa Musa and Peter, the story
of Musa.
Mhmm.
Alright. Next person, Rizan.
Rosanne? Go
ahead.
My reflection is keep
office.
Does that allow?
Sorry, Rosanna. You got cut out. We didn't
hear the reflection.
Can you please repeat?
My reflection is
fit, not in your face.
Did anyone catch that?
If you can please type it because I
I I really wanna know what you said.
I can't hear you clearly.
Yes, ma'am.
Okay.
Alright.
Next person,
miss Linda.
My reflection on today is as a person
living in a non Muslim country, I need
to be more conscious of my
modesty and interactions at work, at home, and
everywhere else.
I I think this is relevant to everyone
all over the world no matter where you
live because
what we see, what we listen to
affects
us. Right? And these days, any when you
look online,
you don't even have to go outside of
your house. Just looking online,
these there's
things that you see or that you hear,
and you think that they're completely normal, but
they're actually
contrary
to It is
contrary to to yell at your mother.
It is contrary to Hayat
to make fun of
people, especially your parents, to ridicule them.
This is all contrary to Hayat.
It is contrary to Hayat to,
you know, to for a woman, for example,
to do tabaruj.
Tabaruj is to display
your beauty.
And beauty is what is,
you know, known as as beautification.
It can be in the form of makeup,
jewelry, clothes.
So the problem is that we get desensitized.
So we have to be very, very careful.
Next person.
It
it is just experience that, you know, I
had a couple of years ago or other
20, 25 years ago when I took charge
of the
department as a director.
And,
by our training, you know, we were not
keeping our I was keeping my gaze low
while talking especially to the girl at the
women
staff because there were about more than 100
people
on my staff. So
I heard from the
this one,
some friends
for who are
from staff that, you know, they were saying,
oh, he never
makes an eye contact because here in in
the west, the eye contact is taken as
a a a matter of, or, you know,
quality of confidence or whatsoever.
So in couple of the meetings, staff meetings,
I explained to them. I say,
in my religion or in my faith, you
know, we respect women, and, you know, we
don't keep our gaze low when we are
talking to them. So later on, you know,
in few months, you know, they learn and,
you know, that, curiosity was addressed.
Mhmm. So does that go for sharing that?
One thing you should be aware of, and
this is for, of course, for everyone,
that
when Allah
says that,
that tell men
that they should lower their gaze,
it doesn't say that they should lower their
gaze all of the time,
and that eye contact is forbidden.
No.
It is that they should lower some of
their gazes.
Alright?
Which some Uneuma described as the second
look.
Alright? That when you are looking
at someone, for example, and you start admiring
their
their hair, alright, and you know that you're
not you're not looking at them in the
right way, then you look down. You turn
your gaze away. You you don't look again.
So it's not the eye contact itself, which
is forbidden because sometimes that is necessary to
ensure that there's proper communication. The other one
the other person knows that you're actually talking
to them because it can actually come across
as offensive as well.
So,
you you don't have to make constant eye
contact,
but you know the condition of your heart
when you see yourself when you know that
you are, you know, admiring something in the
other person, then you, look away.
Insha'Allah.
Next person.
I just wanna say I really appreciate this
talk because,
I I feel like I am as modest
as I can be, but, of course, we
can always improve.
And one issue that I've always had,
because I'm a revert, is that I grew
up in America, and so you have to
shake hands with it, but that's a respectful
way. And so I always struggle with that,
and I often
find myself just feeling, like, peer pressure to
shake hands. And I really appreciate this talk
because I I I saw some advice here
from in the in the chat about how
you can for example, you could put your
hand over your heart and say, I'm sorry.
I don't shake hands.
Or, also, you could, you know, keep your
hands behind your back and just maybe even
mention it ahead of time if it's something
that you don't want it to be
awkward later on. So, again, I just that's,
like, one thing I appreciate is that people
are making comments on that, and I and
I am I will take those to heart
inshallah next time.
And, you know,
the thing is
a lot of people don't even know
the fact that as a Muslim,
you don't shake hands with the opposite gender.
I mean, I
assumed that with my niqah, people a man
would not extend his hand out. Right? But
it has happened with me so many times
wearing a niqah.
Men have literally extended their hand out to
shake hands with me.
I mean, how much more obvious can it
be? I'm not showing my face. So, like,
you you can't I I I don't I
don't I don't want any kind of contact.
But, people don't get it.
So sometimes we just assume
that other people should know. They don't know.
They don't always know. And it's not coming
from, you know, a bad intention. It's just
simply they don't know. And it's it's happened
in so many different settings with me.
So,
you should,
you should be ready from before as to
what you're gonna do and I think this
always works if you just put your hand
on your chest and you say I just
say one sentence. I I don't shake hands
with men. And move on.
You know?
Next person.
So how it goes,
So I just wanted to mention something about
so my reflection for today is about
one of the things that the previous,
sheikhs had mentioned about how is contagious.
And I remember when I was in university,
I hadn't started covering my head then and
rather using the hijab.
And, you know, the first one of the
first people that I met starting in university
was
she she was a hijabi, and, like, eventually,
like, we turned out to really close friends.
But I remember the first time I met
her, I wasn't, like, covering my hair. And,
you know, I start like, I was I
met her, like, and she was covering her
head. I just felt that also he'd be
like, oh, yes. I want to be like
this. And the next time I I saw
her, I was covering my hair. And then
by the third time, I you know, I
wasn't really consistent.
But by the third time that I met
her,
I I wasn't covering my hair. I just
felt some form of, oh, wow. Like, I
messed up. I should have covered my hair.
Right? But it was just because of I
felt that it was because of my association
with her that I just felt that much
to, you know, you know, be modest.
And I remember what, Stan says,
Sheikh Saad mentioned about, you know, modest is
contagious. So I think that that's just my
reflection as to when we surround ourselves with
people like did like, you know, people modest
people, we also kind of,
rub off on that. Thank you.
K. Next person.
I really appreciate this,
talk.
Justine.
I wanted to,
as a parent or 2 parents or teachers
or whoever,
there are some kids you see they're more
shy or modest,
than others, and it's just natural in them.
And I feel that we're in a society
where we're very encouraged to to be very
outgoing and put ourselves out there.
And
some kids just
don't want to be like that, and I
think we need to
really,
never ever shame these children who
they're they're just maybe shy or they're introverted
or they're just,
they don't wanna be that public with everything.
And we should actually celebrate that because I
feel like it's rare.
Mhmm. And,
again, never to shame anyone who wants to
be quiet or maybe not speak up at
certain times.
Mhmm. JazakAllah for sharing this. This is very,
very important.
In fact, in a in a hadith, we
learn about how,
you know, there was a man whom, you
know, people were advising,
against shyness because he was he would he
he was too shy.
And,
it it was said that leave him because
modesty is all good.
So,
of course, if
if you see that your child is too
shy, for example, to say salaam or to
say,
to, you know, have at least some kind
of conversation with, you know, relatives even,
then you might wanna,
coach them into how they can be more
comfortable to say,
because, you you also don't want them to
become
too too social too too conscious,
you know, in in social settings because that
that can
it could turn into social anxiety and and,
Allahu Alam, it it could be, an issue.
So,
our goal is
when it comes to Haya, our goal is
that we never want shyness to prevent us
from doing what Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala wants
us to do.
And if
shyness is holding us back from,
doing something that people want us to do,
we don't always have to comply with people's
wishes and their standards.
But if it's something that Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala wants us to do, then we have
to do that.
Alright.
Will take one last comment.
Go ahead.
I want to share, like, you know, especially
for today as a parent, if we want
our children to be modest, so we should,
you know, be modest ourselves, you know, the
way we dress, the way we speak. So,
you know, our children can see that and
be modest too. You know, instead of judging
them or be rash to them, like, don't
do don't dress like that. Don't do that.
I think at first, we should, you know,
be modest as a parent first.
Alright.
Everyone for your reflections. I'm sorry we couldn't
hear from everyone.
But
keep thinking about it, talking about it,
share with your friends
and your family.
Alright.
We really appreciate it. And thank you everyone
for being with us for,
another session of Ramadan 360. A few final
reminders
as we close out this, beautiful day. I
see a lot of great feedback in the
chat. I pray that this was a time
that was a blessing for you, that you
benefited, that you learned, and I appreciate seeing
everyone support each other in the chat as
well. Don't forget we have tomorrow with,
Sheikh Yahye Ibrahim,
the topic of islah
or repair reconciliation, that'll be the topic tomorrow.
Can't wait to see you then. And then
of course be with us on Saturday.
Saturday, we have our webinar,
accepted du'a
in the Quran. We're going to learn stories
about accepted du'a and, also how to craft
our own du'a as we reach these special
last 10 nights and even beyond them.
How we can craft, the best duas, the
most powerful duas inshallah ta'ala. So we'd love
to see you join us for that. Please
don't miss it. It will be 1 PM
EST. You can join us there at the
portal at ramadan360.orgforward/webinar.
And of course, we also want to shout
out and appreciate our charity partners, HHRD in
the USA, Islamic Relief in Canada, Forgotten Women
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And last thing, be sure to support
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We ask that you please be with us
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Ta'ala accepts from all of us. With that,
we're going to conclude inshallah. We are so
appreciative of everyone who joined us today here
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Allah continue to bless all of you, and
time.
time.