Islamic Marriage 03 Romantic Family

Thank you

forever be true cherish

remember, will always be there.

Rahim salatu salam ala rasulillah Karim sallallahu alayhi wa sallam on Welcome to Islamic marriage. As you know we for those of you who were following we we talked about the blessings of Allah subhana wa tada concerning marriage. And we talked about what a loss of Hannah was that we were those individuals who will continue being a dutiful spouse and beautiful family members. We also talked about how women view men and we talked about some of the points such as the like husbands to have the leadership skills, other qualities that we will mention today we start with saying that they love romantic man. Now, so had a lot you may say, Subhana Allah, you know, what about Dean What

about? We are talking about that? See, Dean is already done. A Muslim sister shinier even entertain a man with our Dean without a religion shouldn't even consider if he doesn't pray if he doesn't feel a law that is out of the list we're talking about when we pass that stage. They like a man who's romantic.

And the messenger on law, some of the law while he was sending them. He was very romantic. A pseudo lies a lie while he was setting them was a man always trying to please his wife.

Remember when he says the law and he will send them and the food that you put in the mouth of your wife is a saga. Tara's encouragement for men, when they're sitting face to face, and they should feed each other nowadays in the confines of Western society. You know, has been when he's a good moon wants to impress his wife, all while the dating in a hot on dating. Then what they do they feed each other. Islam is telling you if you do that, you're getting a set up. And not only that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to play what his wife used to talk to them, used to listen to them used to call them nickname. And I shuttled the alarm on her when she was asked,

what was the first thing that I used to do when he enters his house? She said, First that he used to do he used to use miswak because he wants to smell nice for his wife. And why would you want to smell nice for your wife unless you want to be in a position of intimacy with your wife.

Also, when I shouldn't have sort of the low Anima when they were jealous of one of the other wives of the Messenger of Allah who used to feed him honey. She used to feed him honey, I'd also love the honey. But he also used to love the company of his wife. So these two women, they said, Listen, since we don't have honey, and we can feed him on and he loves the honey. So why don't we do this? When it comes closer to you, say or Jada? Salalah Did he eat something that's unusual? And then Mr. gela will say, oh, something is wrong with my breath.

And they'll say yes.

And then he goes to hafsa and Hauser will say the same thing and there's Do you eat honey?

Yes Oh that's why answer the messenger of over law. He thought by eating honey will disturb my relationship with my wife and I can be no longer close to them. Then you said is how long for me to eat honey? And he forbade eating honey for himself. But a last set yeah you have Navy you Lima to hardly mama Hello ma Hua Taka, taka taka moto bata as what? He said oh my messenger what would you phone bit? Yes sir what Allah made in love for you trying to please your wives and look. So what also lies on the long run he was and it was a very romantic man, he will always sit with his wife, talk to his wife, you know, tell him stories. Even I shadow the law on honey that was on long hand

is when she was telling him, he will be listening lovingly to his wife. Now, when we say the man has to be romantic, I don't mean that a man has to go and take his wife, one of those expensive restaurant when they dim the lights and they bring in wine or champagne to the table, or the next guys eat drinking that was eating poor. No, those are hard on places to be so do not go. Because we certainly be the only messenger of a loss. It is not for a moment to be on tables where wine is served.

And I'm asking you to do simple things.

Like buy her flower,

roses, you know, when you do this, she will love you. And she will think you are the most romantic person. So Islam is encouraging men to be like, with the women also like is there like a man who is a lawless, who is sincere to the relationship committed to the relationship,

see from the nature of men, that when they get married to this wife, he's thinking about Mashallah, I have this wife, but I can still look around, and I will have Al Hamdulillah is acceptable. But it should not be through any haram means. And that's why women, they love the man that is sincerely

committed to their relationship, not cheating on them. Not talking to this ladies while he is pretending that he's a righteous man. None of that. And this is what they like. And this is what they asked for in the process, while the screening this man who's proposing to her, this is the things that they look for. And that's what I always do, you will find sisters having a very serious question, or they have long lists of questions, asking them while the guy will just come on set. And he has no question. He has no absolute questions. Absolutely. There's no question. But she has a long list nine page long questions. What do you like? What don't you like? What do you do? What

don't you do? How do you behave this habits and so on? Another thing that they like, and this is from this studies of the special from Western society, but I think we can Islamic. They like a man who looks sharp.

Someone who is we dress well, you know, he takes care of himself. He is always looking at his best. It is very usual for a man to say to his wife, I want you to look nice for me, or why should I look good for husband. But it is somebody you see men taking care of themselves for their wives. And this is part of our shedding as a matter of fact, because a loss that in the Koran, what a hoonah myths do ladies

and women have equal right on their husbands, as husbands have rights over them. One of these students have under the law even adverse or the law when

he came to learn from this great Sahabi great scholar of his time. Student of assuta law students have a book kannamma student of the great others to have

any walk into his house or into this place where he will live in our bus was and he found out the live bus

taking care of himself fixing himself fixing his outfit.

And the students was very disappointed.

And he said he had no bus or service bus. Nobody would look at him.

Even

we travel distance for you so we can learn from you.

And you're sitting right here in front of a mirror, looking at yourself, taking care of yourself, dressing of yourself like a woman, and even our bus teacher,

righteous man wants his students to learn and listen. He said he had in a jido rpki tabula. He said, Oh young man, I find this behavior of mine, this act of mine, in the book of the law, the young man in the Koran, he says in the Quran is aware. He said, Allah set what a mithila do

and they have exact equal right over you as you have over them.

So when a man takes care of himself looks sharper his wife is from the dean. It is from the dean from the Sharia. And the messenger over law he used to look clean and nice for his wife

was always clean. Always is smelling nice, always looking sharp with what he has. And this is what the message is such a long run he was seldom taught us used to put nice Turpin when he's going out of the house, he used to dress nice at home, some had a lot of sort of lights on the law and he was selling them. He is the best example. And Allah subhana wa tada set up that kind of local funeral, so he was a hustler. So we should follow the messenger over a lot. And we will continue with the list of the things that women like in men. As soon as we came back from this commercial Isla, Santa Monica de la rahmanir rahim and welcome back to Islamic marriage. And we are addressing this issue

from angles that is not familiar or is not known to a lot of people. And a lot of older generation may say oh, this is not what we used to know about the rules of Mecca. But Alhamdulillah most of the people would agree this is unnecessary steps, especially when the young lady is looking to get married. And especially when the when you have that young lady is screening this man young man who came to propose to his daughter. One of the other things that women like in men is they like the man who's easygoing, forgiving. Always forgives. So true. Look at us as men. We love those who forgive our sins and for shortcomings.

We love when we make mistake for our authority to say it is okay. When you don't show up at work, because your car broke down or you couldn't get there on time. And you all nervous and you're all you know, panicking and he says to you It's okay. Because I love this

woman also human. They love men and husbands are almost forgiving.

And then the V is a long Ronnie he was selling them a soul lies in the long run he was he said

his mo min min. Man husband should not be harsh

and forgiving, unforgiving. His wife and what? Mina

in our socket Amina Hello. When is displeased some of her act only a minute.

He's pleased with her other acts. She's not an excellent cook. But she cleans well. She doesn't clean well. But she is excellent wife. She is an excellent wife. But she is a perfect mother. So you always overlook the shortcomings. And you concentrate on the positive side.

How do you Massara

she said one of the women in the audience and I shut up the low Ana. She's telling her husband Hamad bin Abdullah is on the low on he was send them a story over these 11 women and she said one of them sent out a Salalah zoji either

way the hora as she said my husband

when he enters the house, he behaves like a flipper. You know,

you know calm and fast quick but when is resting her uterus he already looks a lot of things. nothing bothers him.

So she said my husband when he comes home he

behaves like that.

He doesn't ask, what happened, what is happening? And why the food is not ready. Why the children that's asleep? Why the house is not clean? What did you do with the food I purchase? What did you do? None of that he just relax.

She also said,

What either hot Raja and when he leaves the house as he acts like a lion, he's a man. Nowadays the other way around. At home, we act like men, like lions rule outside. so humble, simple, easygoing, individual.

And then she continues at what is and I'm not. And he doesn't ask about anything among us. Not because electing the house. No, he overlooks things is a good quality.

I'm gonna be hot over the long run

ameerul momineen, very strong men strong and

personality. physically strong, big, strong man.

And people used to fear him because of his appearance. And this one of the people of the city of Medina.

He could not deal with his wife.

He couldn't.

She's always bad mouthing him. She's not listening.

He's scold her didn't work. He bring family in from his side, or her side didn't work before this, and that he gave him this didn't work. I told her what I lost. That didn't work. So he said maybe the only solution here is if I really go to ameerul momineen. And tell him, help me out here and come and talk to my wife. Maybe she would hear you. I'm gonna do two for wife. So he knocked on the door of the house of hon.

And to his surprise, the wife of oma is hearing

Viola. She's raising her voice. She's saying go open the door. Do this. She's ordering him around the house is the man that everybody fears him. When the Sahabi heard this,

he just turned and walked away. When you turn, I'm gonna hop up, open the door. And he said, What? How can I help you? He said, Yeah, Mira, momineen. It's okay. He said, No, you came for a reason why you hear? You say ameerul momineen. It's okay. I understand it. So listen, if you don't tell me why you came out hertz, you know, look is outside the house. He's behaving like a man. And he said,

I came to ask for your assistant, for your help with my wife. But it seems that you need help. She's yelling and screaming at you.

He smiled and he said, Come.

So listen.

They are the mothers of our children.

They cook for us. They clean for us. They take care of the house. And when we need them, they're there for us. If they lose their temper once a while, should we forgive them?

And the man said, Yes. Maybe that's why I had all this problem.

Because I was dealing with her. Without forgiveness. You cannot make mistake. This is what I asked her to do do it.

And I'm gonna be upset.

Couldn't been a milotic. He said between the hands of your wife, like a Savi. He said be in the house. Like a little boy. Your wife says, do this, you do it.

Don't do this, you don't do it. I need your help you go help.

And he said when you come out of the house behave like a man

or woman.

So women that naturally love that person, that man 100 in that would forgive their shortcomings, he will overlook their mistakes and so on. And then also then evaluate things based on emotions.

Most of the time

when a man can be very objective, straightforward, put his emotions aside and deal with the situation. objectively. Most women most of them cannot help. So they like the man to be very clear, clear and expressing himself when understanding them

So they know they can relate to this man.

One of the things that men don't know when they're dealing with women is they're not like us, in terms of you want to deal with this person, face to face is straightforward. You know, the point is clear. This is what happened. This is the fact it's done.

A women the one emotions to be involved. So, if the husband

is not clear, expressing his feelings, then there's a problem. Again, going back to Heidi toamasina, one of the wives and when she was describing her husband, she said zoji II? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Couldn't do that in the Huda shed, Jackie. Oh, fun lucky. On Gemma ockenden lucky.

She said my husband. Is i A is not clear. I don't know what he wants. He cannot transmit that information to me. Oh, yeah. Oh II,

Canada in Nevada. She said he has every illness that a man can have. Shed Jackie.

Often lucky. Because he cannot express himself clearly. That he expressed himself physically. So he hits, breaks, bone, scratch, open hats. This is what he does. Shine jacket. Oh, fun. Lucky. Oh, Jenna cola. A shed is when you cut

or break. And they say on a good day, he may do both of them.

Now women, on the other hand, they don't like aggressiveness, not all of them. They like the man that can said make them upset and talk to them.

And explain things to them very clearly.

This is how most women view men. This is how women look at men. Now, of course, you will have you will always have those exception. women. Women, some of them are very aggressive and they like their husbands to be aggressive.

Others, they may like their husbands to be enough. And I know of those women some hand a lot they'd like to control their husbands. There are those women who wants a husband to be indecisive and they want to rule everything. They want to rule what comes in what goes out of the house. They want to dictate what husbands should do not do what is on Islamic.

But the majority of women they love this. In the next episode inshallah. I will talk about what men like about women, what attracts men to women. Now we know how women see men. Let us see how men see women. And that's what I have to say. Sarah Monaco SuperSonics performance, I'm an understudy. 100 la Rabbil aalameen. See you till next episode, be in India

forever be to cherish this life that's destined for you live.

long, hard is what she was telling him, he will be listening lovingly to his wife. Now when we say the man has to be romantic, I don't mean that a man has to go and take his wife, one of those expensive restaurant when they dim the lights and they bring in wine or champagne to the table. Or the next guys in drinking that was eating pork. No, those are hard on places to be so do not go because we still own the Messenger of Allah said it is not for a moment to be on tables where wine is served.

And I'm asking you to do simple things.

Like buy her flower.

Roses. You know, when you do this, she would love you, she would think you are the most romantic person. So Islam is encouraging men to be like, when the women also like is there like a man who is a lawless, who is sincere to the relationship committed to the relationship. See from nature of men, that when they get married to this wife, he's thinking about Mashallah, I have this wife, but I can still look around and I will have Al Hamdulillah is acceptable, but it should not be through any haraam means and that's why women, they love the man that is sincerely

committed to them. Really

She's not cheating on them. Not talking to this ladies, while he's pretending that he's a righteous man. None of that. And this is what they like. And this is what they asked for. And in the process while this screening, this man who is proposing to her, this is the things that they look for, and that's when always you will find sisters having a very serious question, or they have long lists of questions, asking them while the guy will just come and sit. And he has no question. He has no absolute questions. Absolutely. There's no question. But she has a long list nine page long questions. What do you like? What don't you like? What do you do? What don't you do? How do you

behave this habits and so on? Another thing that they like, and this is from this studies of the special from Western society, but I think we can Islamic. They like a man who looks sharp.

Someone who is we dress well, you know, he takes care of himself. He is always looking at his best. It is very usual, for a man to say to his wife, I want you to look nice for me, or why should I look good for husband. But it is seldom that you see men taking care of themselves, for their wives. And this is part of our Shetty as a matter of fact, because a loss that in the Koran, what a huna needs to do ladies

and women have equal rights on their husbands, as husbands have rights over them. One of these students have under the law, or the law when

he came to learn from this great Sahabi great scholar of his time, student of law, soda law, students have a book on our law student of the great others to have

any walk into his house or into this place where he have to live in our bus was and he found out the live bus

taking care of himself fixing himself fixing his outfit.

And the students was very disappointed.

And he said he had no bus also have a bus. Nobody would look at a burden even

with travel distance for you so we can learn from you.

And you're sitting right here in front of a mirror, looking at yourself taking care of yourself, dressing them yourself like a woman and even our boss, teacher,

righteous man wanted to students to learn and listen. He said he had in a genuine tabula. He said oh young man, I find this behavior of mine. This act of mine in the book of Allah, the young man in the Koran, he says in the Quran, he's aware. He said Allah said what a mithila do

and they have exact echo right over you as you have over them.

So when a man takes care of himself, looks sharp for his wife is from the dean. It is from the dean from the Sharia. And the messenger over law he used to look clean and nice for his wife

was always clean. Always smelling nice. Always looking sharp with what he has. And this is what the message is Southern long run he was self taught us used to put nice Turpin when he's going out of the house. He used to dress nice at home some had a lot of sort of lights on the low on he was send them he is the best example. And Allah subhana wa tada set up a local funeral so he was in Hazara so we should follow the messenger overlock. Now we will continue with the list of the things that women like in men. As soon as we came back from this commercial Isla Santa Monica Villa Rania Rahim and welcome back to Islamic marriage. And we are addressing this issue from angles that is not familiar

or is not known to a lot of people. And a lot of older generation may say oh, this is not what we used to know about the rulings of nicaea. But Alhamdulillah most of the people would agree this is unnecessary steps, especially when the young lady is looking to get married. And especially when the when he have that young lady is is screening this man young man

came to propose to his daughter. One of the other things that women like in men is they like the man who's easygoing, forgiving. Always forgives. So true. Look at us as men. We love those who forgive our sins and for shortcomings.

We live when we make mistake for our authority to say it is okay.

When you don't show up, a work goes to your car broke down or you couldn't get there on time. And you all nervous and you're all you know, panicking when he says to you, it's okay. As I love this

woman, also human thing love men husbands, almost forgiving.

And then maybe is a long run. He was

a soldier lies on the long run he was he said, I mean, it's a min min. Man. husband should not be harsh,

unforgiving, to his wife.

Either. Sasha tahmina Hello. When is displeased some of her act. Only a minute.

His fees were her other acts. She's not an excellent cook. But she cleans well. She doesn't clean well. But she is excellent wife. She is an excellent wife. But she is a perfect mother. So you always overlook the shortcomings. And you concentrate on the positive side. Honey Massara.

She said, one of the women in the Hadith and I shall be alone. Rhonda. She's telling her husband Hamad bin Abdullah is on the low on He will send them the story over these 11 women. And she said one of them sending out a Salalah zoji. Either

way, the hora as she said my husband

when he enters the house, he behaves like a liver. You know, liver, you know, calm animal fast, quick. But when he's resting her uterus, he overlooks a lot of things. nothing bothers him.

So she sent my husband when he comes home, he behaves like that.

He doesn't ask what happened, what is happening? And why the food is not ready. Why the children that's asleep? Why the house is not clean. What did you do with the food I purchase? What did you do? None of that he just relax.

She also said

what either hot Raja and when he leaves the house as he acts like a lion. He's a man. Nowadays is the other way around. at home. We act like men, like lions rule outside. so humble, simple, easygoing, individuals.

And then she continues at what is and I'm not. And he doesn't ask about anything around the house. Not because electing the house. No, he overlooks things is a good quality.

ameerul momineen very strong men strong and

personality. physically strong, big, strong man.

And people used to fear him because of his appearance. And this one of the people of the city of Medina.

He could not deal with his wife.

He couldn't.

She's always bad mouthing him. She's not listening.

he scold her didn't work. He bring family from his side or her side didn't work before this and that he gave him the car didn't work. I told her what Allah said didn't work. So he said maybe the only solution here is if I really go to a meal meaning and tell him help me out here and come and talk to my wife. Maybe she would hear you and the dutiful wife. So he knocked on the door of the house of almond milk.

And to his surprise, the wife of a woman is yearning.

She's raising her voice. She's saying go open the door. Do this. She's already going around the house is the man that everybody fears him on so have you heard this?

He just turned and walked away.

When you turn a mobile hotspot open the door. And he said, What? How can I help you? He said, Yeah, Mira, I mean, it's okay. He said, No, you came for a reason. Why are you here? You say ameerul momineen. It's okay. I understand it. So listen, if you don't tell me why you came out hurt, you know, look is after the house is behaving like a man. And he said, me a woman. I can't ask for your assistance, for your help with my wife, but it seems that you need help. She's yelling and screaming at you.

He smiled, and he said, Come.

So listen.

They are the mothers of our children.

They cook for us, they clean for us. They take care of the house. And when we need them, they're there for us. If they lose their temper once and why shouldn't we forgive them?

And the man said, Yes. Maybe that's why I had all this problem.

Because I was dealing with her. Without forgiveness, you cannot make mistake. This is what I asked her to do, do it.

And I'm gonna be upset.

who'd been a neurotic, he said, Be between the hands of your wife. I can Savi he say be in the house. Like a little boy. Your wife says, do this, you do it.

Don't do this, you don't do it. I need your help you go help.

And he said when you come out of the house behave like a man called Raja

Raja. So women that naturally love that person, that man, what happened in that would forgive their shortcomings, he will overlook their mistakes, and so on. And then also they evaluate things based on emotions.

Most of the time,

when a man can be very objective, straightforward, put his emotions aside and deal with the situation. objectively, most women most of them cannot help. So they like the man to be very clear, clear and expressing himself when understanding them. So they know that they can relate to this.

One of the things that men don't know when they're dealing with women is they don't like us, in terms of you want to deal with this person, face to face is straightforward. You know, the point is clear. This is what happened. This is the fact it's done.

A women the one emotions to be involved. So if the husband

is not clear, expressing his feelings, then there's a problem. Again, going back to Heidi toamasina, one of the wives and when she was describing her husband, she said zoji II yeah.

Oh, yeah. Canada in the Huda shed, Jackie. Oh, fun lucky. Oh, Gemma ockenden lucky.

She said My husband is I A is not where? I don't know what he wants. He cannot transmit that information to me. Oh, yeah. Oh II,

Canada in Nevada. She said he has every illness that a man can have. Shed Jackie.

Often lucky, because he cannot express himself clearly. That he expressed himself physically. So he hits breaks bone, scratch, open hats.

This is what he does. shun Jackie often lucky Oh, Jenna cola. I should when you cut

or break, and they say on a good day. He may do both of them. Now women, on the other hand, they don't like aggressiveness. Not all of them. They like the man that can said negative said and talk to them Russian and explain things to them very clearly.

This is how most women view men. This is how women look at men. Now, of course you would have you will always have those exception. women. Women, some of them are very aggressive and they like their husbands to be aggressive. Others they may like their husbands to be enough. And I know of those women, some had a lot a lot

to control their husbands, there are those women who wants a husband to be indecisive and they want to rule everything. They want to rule what comes in what goes out of the house. They want to dictate what husbands should do not do, which is not Islamic.

But the majority of women, they love this. In the next episode inshallah, I will talk about what men like about women, what attracts men to women. Now we know how women see men, let us see how men see women. And this is what I have to say. So I'm not

100 in I mean, it's our next episode will

forever be to cherish this life that's destined for you