Let Me Talk to These Kids
Channel: Nouman Ali Khan
File Size: 32.38MB
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an end of Year Holiday Season Christmas break New Year's break, lots of you are off from school. So the mustard is more full than usual. And I was given a request. Lots of kids are here, can you give a hotbar so we can tell them to pray. Because these kids, they're at home, and they're not listening to their parents, and they're not praying. So can you just get them to pray somehow. And this is going to be, I'm going to title this. But let me just talk to these kids. And what I want the kids here to do, those of you that are struggling with praying or you don't feel like praying, and your mom's nagging you and telling you come on, come on, get up, pray, pray, you're on vacation, what
excuse do you have, let's go to the masjid and you're dragging your feet and you're like, Come on, get off my case already. This is annoying. And even when you're praying, you're rolling your eyes after you say Allahu Akbar your life. You know, this is what you're doing.
You're a parent, let me talk to the parents for a second, if you forced your children to pray, or you pressure them and nag them into praying, and they somehow prayed. And they're 1314 15 years old, you might feel better, but they don't. And this religion is actually not about what is happening on the outside. The essence of this religion is what is happening on the inside. So just because you see a behavior that you would like to see, that actually doesn't mean that we have accomplished something good with our children. That's, in a sense, it's good, but it's artificial. It's on the outside. It's like a tree like a beautiful tree, but it's hollow on the inside. Allah describes the
core of this religion as a slow habit, we'll find out we'll have a summer, right? It's essence that is like a tree like the roots are deep and firm. And then its branches go into the sky. When any human being is lazy about praying, and I'm not talking about three or four year olds, and I'm not talking about six year olds. I'm talking about children that are now cognitive. They can ask intelligent questions. They're smart, you can you guys can dad and the son or the daughter can play the same level of video game. They can watch the same TV shows they're at an ability where they can comprehend things at a higher level. They have some of the same interests that you have. If you're
watching a game on TV, they're watching it with you. Right? So they're not in at some things. They're at the same intellectual capacity as you of course, their children. Their brains haven't fully developed yet, but they're still lesser, but at some level, they have become intelligent beings. And they're down, you know, demonstrating their ability to make their own choices and to, you know, to think
for themselves and to ask intelligent questions. So for those of you young men and women that are sitting in the audience, and I'm not gonna call you children, I'll call you young men and women.
Let me just pretend that just pretend that your dad is talking to you, or your mom is talking to you. In this clip, I'm gonna pretend I'm talking to my own kid, while I'm giving this football, and when I'm not on a member, I'm sitting at home, just having a chat with my child. And I, how do I tell them to pray? The first thing I want to start by saying is there was a time, my dear, that I didn't know you. And you were not relevant to me. You didn't exist I didn't care about you. Never thought about you, you were nothing to me. Lamb Yakushi and with Cora Quran says, There was a time in the life of a human being where he was not remembered at all. And including me, I didn't remember
you, I didn't know what your name was going to be. I didn't know what you, I didn't love you at all, because you were zero to me, nothing to me. But then all of a sudden you came in my life. And even when I found out that, your mom is going to give you birth, while she was holding you in her belly, and even the mom, I used to wonder what you're going to be like, but I had no idea. I had no clue part of me was scared, you'd be like me. But I had no idea what you would be like. And even as you were growing up, I was when you were a baby, I still didn't really know you, I knew that you need to be fed. And sometimes you smell really bad. Other than that, I didn't know much about you, I had to
clean you and feed you. But I didn't know much about it. And now that you're you're growing up, and we can talk and communicate now and you're going to school and you know, we live in the same house, I just want you to know that this relationship wasn't always there. And I also want you to know that this relationship will not always be there, we have very little time together. We don't have a lot of time together. And very soon, you're going to become an adult, you're on the way to becoming an adult, that's not very far away. In fact, when you were a baby, till now feels like a month, like blink my eyes and you became this this thing. And before you know it, you're going to be an adult,
you're going to go to university, you're going to get a job, you're going to get married, all these things are going to happen in sha Allah, if Allah wills. And when that happens, it's not going to be like this, you're not going to come home to me, you're not going to spend time with me, you're going to have your job, your family, your wife, your husband, whatever, that you're gonna have your own life. So the time that we do have together is very limited. And even in that time, you've got school, I've got work, got groceries to do I've got. So we have like 20 minutes in a day where we can actually have a conversation, we have very little time actually together. And when you get
older, the thing you will remember about me are those few moments we have together because we don't have 24 hours together, we just don't.
So now the first thing I want you to know is that I barely know you. I barely know, I know we live together, but I barely know you you know why? Because no human being can truly know another human being you don't tell me everything you're thinking. And I don't tell you everything that I'm thinking. But there's someone who knew you. Even when you were nothing to me, and someone who loved you, even when nothing in this creation loved you. No one in this creation loved you. And someone who will have a relationship with you, even though my relationship with you is going to change. Many of the adults sitting here even me as a dad, I know my relationship with my dad, when I was a kid
was different in my relationship with him and when I was in college was different. And my relationship with him now is completely different. Even though we're the same people, our relationship has completely changed. But there is someone who has loved you, and has protected you and has planned for you and has taken care of you from the beginning. And will always do so. And that's not me.
I'm just and I'm just an episode in your life. I'm not more than that. It's a beautiful episode that Allah gave you and me together. But it's not a permanent episode. That's the first thing I want you to know. The second thing I want you to know is when I tell you to pray, or tell you to do something, you feel like I'm controlling you. I'm bossing you around, I'm telling you what to do. I want you to know something, I can't control you. I can give you advice. I can be strict with you. Sometimes that's true. But pretty soon you're gonna get old enough where no matter how hard I yell, and no matter how much I raise my voice and how frustrated I get, it won't matter because you're
going to make your own choices.
You're going to say, okay, Dad, I'll talk to you later. Okay, I gotta go. I got another call, and you're just gonna hang up on me, and you're gonna do your own thing. And in fact, most of the time, I will not have any control over the choices you make. In fact, when you're at school, and you're hanging out with your friends, and you're talking to your friends, I don't control any of those conversations. And if I've already given you an iPad or a phone or whatever, and your community
kidding with your friends, I have no control over the kinds of communications you're having. And even if I put parenting control apps on these devices, I still can't control what you're really thinking and what you're really doing I, I can have some control. But I have very limited control. But there's someone who controlled every cell in your body, who controlled the microscopic fluid that you were that made inside made it inside the womb of your mother that controlled the genetic sequence with which you would be created the color of your skin, the way your hair looks, your eyes, the way your mind works, how tall and short you are going to he controlled everything. He actually
has control I don't
I'm reminded of something the prophets I said, I'm told his daughter Fawlty model the Allahu anha. He said, Yeah, Fatima, Tobin's Mohammed a tequila in the family Kula came in Allah, He che Fatima, daughter of Muhammad, be mindful of Allah, I will have no authority with Allah in your case. Which brings me to my next point, because I don't have control. The truth is as as protective as I am of you, and I want you to do good. I don't control that. And I'm not responsible for it either. Allah made every human being responsible for themselves. No, you know, you see that if, if you cut a track, if you become get a driver's license one day and you cut a traffic light, and the cop pulls
you over, you're not going to say, can you talk to my dad?
Let's talk, you're gonna have to deal with that yourself.
When you're when your university professor is going to fail you in the class, you're gonna say, Hold on, let me call my mom. Nope. You're responsible yourself. In the court of law, you're responsible yourself at the university, you're responsible for yourself at your job, you're responsible for yourself, for your health, what you put in your body, you're responsible for yourself, for putting yourself in danger and hurting yourself, you're responsible for yourself, the older you're getting, the more freedom you have, the more responsible for yourself you are, you cannot be controlled by anyone and no one else is responsible for you that is utilizing not on withdrawal, okra, nobody will
carry anybody else's burden, I am actually not responsible for you. Because Allah will end on judgment day. Absolutely. Every one of us will come in front of Allah alone, right now we're together, we live together, we're a family, we hug each other, I love you to death, I think about you all the time. But there's a day coming, where we're going to be just as alone as we ever were in our existence. In fact, even if you come running to me a judgement day, it could happen that I'm going to run away from you.
I don't know you get away from me, I got my own issues right now. Because my relationship with you was these few, you know, microseconds compared to my relationship with Allah, which is a much bigger relationship, it's a lot older, and it's gonna last a lot longer. Right. And I have to deal with that relationship right now on Judgment Day. So this relationship your way, your federal boardroom, in a B, you owe me? Well, but you know, and all those I had, a person will run from his mother, his father, his children, his siblings, his spouse, some of you said running from the spouse already do that. Okay, anyway.
the next thing I want you to know,
is that I need to feel that you respect me, I need to feel that you love me. Just like you need to feel like I care about you. When you love someone, you kind of have some needs from them, you need for me to make sure that the house is taken care of you need to make sure you my responsibility you need from me that the electricity bills are paid, and the heating is working. And you need for me to make sure that you can get to school you need to make sure for me to make sure that you're you have clothes, those are my responsibilities. And I need to make sure that I feel some respect from you and regard from you and obedience from I get that. But the relationship you have with Allah is
different. You have a lot of needs from him, he has no needs from you.
He doesn't need you at all. Actually, he doesn't need anyone or anything.
And let's just talk about you. When you say why do I need to pray? What is Allah need me to pray? Allah doesn't need for you to do anything.
It's not about him at all. Allah even says, When nothing will remain. Let me just give you an example from the Quran when nothing will remain in this universe. Let's talk about that for about the glory of Allah for a second. Recently, I was in Qatar during the World Cup. And the team that wins so Argentina wins. And there it's a glorious event, and they're being celebrated as champions, right? But imagine if they were If the athlete was being celebrated, but there was no crowd, no cameras, no stadium
Nothing a guy lives on him on his own on an island. And he kicks a golden to kick the ball into a golden system, glory and nobody's there. That sounds psychotic, doesn't it? To have glory, you need to have an audience
to be acknowledged. You need to have people around somebody acknowledged to have praise, to have appreciation. You can't have appreciation by yourself. You got to have someone doing it for you.
But Allah says go lumen Allah have fun, way up college hoorah, because of God when
He says everything will stop existing on this earth, and yet, the face of Europe will remain and it will still possess Glory, Allah is the only one who is glorious, even when there's no one glorifying him.
Only one, anybody else needs somebody else to do it.
So Allah does not need my prayers. Allah doesn't need me to eat halal chicken. Allah doesn't need me to not say bad, he doesn't need any of that from me. So just get that thought out of your head, that somehow you're doing anybody a favor. If Allah even says Yama, Noona, alayka and Islam. They think they're doing you a favor by accepting Islam. You know, that they wouldn't do either. Yeah, Islamic and don't tell me that you're doing me a favor with your Islam. But Allahu Yamano Alikum Allah is the one doing you a favor. Now, the next thing?
Why does someone not pray? I'm not talking about you, my dear son or my daughter. I'm not talking about you. But just let's ask the question. Why does someone not pray? When there could be lots of answers? But Allah has his own answer to that question. It's a pretty scary answer. It's an answer I read in the beginning of this hotbar. He said philosophy, the Kawada sada Well, I can cancer but what?
He didn't actually accept the truth. And he nor did he pray.
Allah says he was talking about disbelievers. And he said two things. They didn't accept that this person doesn't accept the truth. And he doesn't pray. Interesting.
So if you say if he didn't accept the truth, I would expect him to say La sadaqa. Whether Armineh write, but he says La sada. What that means is,
something is missing, in you accepting the truth about Allah.
No, no, no, the child says, I believe in Allah. I'm Muslim. Yeah, you're Muslim, here. You're Muslim in your head. But this truth isn't just for your head, this truth is also for your heart. Something is you're not feeling how true this is yet. You're not feeling how serious this is yet. You don't realize what it is sometimes you know, something, but you don't think about it.
It's true. You know, something, you don't think about it. And so, because that's missing, that's why it becomes easy for me to miss prayer sometimes and you'll miss prayer. Sometimes that will happen because our heart becomes a little distracted. And that truth of this deen the truth of who Allah is. That truth goes in a shelf in the back of our mind and we get distracted and don't think about it. That's what Allah is saying.
So Allah doesn't need you to pray. And even if you prayed, because I'm telling you to, what are you going to do? I'm praying for how are you going to make the intention? I'm praying for record because my dad won't get off my case. Hola. Hola. quota.
Allah even told us the Prophet told us actions have no value unless they have the right intentions in them, Allah Malou the new yards. actions have no so even if you did this action, what your intention was, I'm annoying. That's your intention, then it does. It benefits me in no way and it will benefit you in no way. The only one that can benefit from your actual sincere prayer is you know, okay, fine. That's the answer to the question. Why would someone not pray to more things to talk to you about?
One of them is what's the purpose of praying? Like, what's the point?
Because you might think the purpose of praying is so you don't burn in hell.
The purpose of prayer is because if you don't pray, Allah is gonna hate you. The purpose of prayers, if you don't pray, you're just gonna get punished. Or you won't even be a Muslim anymore. And the, the angels will curse you and all this negative stuff. Allah didn't mention those purposes.
The the purpose of prayer is not not to get away from something negative.
The purpose of prayer is to run towards something positive.
That's the purpose of prayer. Do you know the difference between the student who's studying so they don't fail? And the student who's studying because they love this
subject, one student is studying because of something positive, the other student is studying because they're trying to escape something negative, an employee who loves their work, and an employee who just doesn't want to get fired.
They're doing the same exact job, same exact job, but one of them is so happy, so filled with joy. And one of them is so depressed and so miserable. Why? Because one of them is doing this to escape something negative, and the other one is doing it to go towards something positive. Allah in the Quran when he told me about the prayer and why we should pray, what's the point of the prayer, he said, he told Musa alayhis salam this when he met him, he said, alchemist salata, the decree is make sure you become maintain the prayer so that you can remember me maintain the prayer so you can remember me I told you already my relationship with you is very limited. But your relationship with
Allah has started a long time before you even came in this world. And your relationship will continue with him a long time after you even leave this world.
And that relationship is worth remembering. Because every good thing that comes to you comes from that relationship. Some good things come because I'm your dad. Some good things but all the good things that come to you only come to you because of that relationship. So if you want all the positive things to say in your life, you must remember where all of the hate comes from. All of the Nirma comes from. All of that is comes from all of the guidance comes from. So Allah says the best way you can remember that is that you remember Allah ye prayer. The best way to remember Allah is the prayer Alchemist, Salah tele decree, that's why you should pray.
And finally, okay, that's why you should do it. But just because you're doing it for the right reasons, that's not Allah, Allah says that's not enough. There's some benefits to
there's some some, some good things will come your way. When you truly remember Allah. When you truly remember Allah the way he wants you to. And the way he wants you to is these prayers.
If you can do this, Allah says in Masada, tenha, and fascia, you will Moncure and even in this ayah, whether they could Allahu Akbar,
he says prayer has the benefit of stopping you from falling into things that are in decent,
because indecency is all around you. And I son cannot stop you from being exposed to it.
And decency is on your device, in decencies, at your school, in decencies, among your friends, in decencies, at an eat party, when you're going to court or talking to your friends, indecency will be everywhere.
And every time you go towards indecency, your heart will get damaged.
And Allah says if you can maintain this prayer, it will prevent you from falling into indecency.
And once you fall into indecency, then you become you know, like if you're if you're breathing in pollution, at first you will cough, right. But if you stay long enough, you just get used to it. While on decencies like that, when you're when you're taking it long enough, it's not that big of a deal anymore. You don't feel like protecting yourself from it anymore. Because your your your immune system has gotten corrupt. Right and then you're ready for even more toxic behavior, even worse things while munkar even worse things that you know that you can do. And this prayer will stop you from going down a negative path in your life. That's why you should pray. Now these are the reasons
you should pray not because I'm telling you to pray. At the end of this whole journey. The decision is entirely yours. Because I might I Allah might take me tomorrow.
Allah might take me a year from now. And that relationship you and I have even if we lived 100 years, we can live longer than that. We can there's a time where this is going to end. But that relationship, if you really want to respect and honor that relationship, pray, that would be my advice to you. So this is just a small reminder to me, I'll come back to the parents now. A small reminder for myself and for all of us as parents, that the children we've been given are an Amana. They are not something given to us so we can control them. The more we try to control them, the more frustrated we become anyway. And the more I have seen this, especially in families that wanted to
preserve the deen of their children, the more they tried to push the religion on their children with control. The more those children rebelled in the strangest ways, in the strangest ways because the thing that Allah wants to give the opportunity you have with your children is not to make them surrender to your instructions, the opportunity
You have with them is to make them think about things that only you can make them think about. Make them love things only you can make them love. Your kid loves basketball because he sees you play basketball. He loves the PlayStation because he sees dad play the PlayStation, you can put a love in your child, because of how you are, you can do that. And when you tell your kid, do your homework, do your homework, your kid is not going to be 40 years old and say I love homework.
But your kid could be 40 years old and say I love basketball. My dad used to play all the time loved it. What you love gets transferred over what you instruct gets rejected. That's your reality. Forget your children. That's your own reality, the things some of the things you love about your dad are the things that were passed down by love. And some of the things you hate about your dad are the things that he tried to shove down your throat. That's the reality of everyone sitting here knew even if you don't say it out loud, because we love our parents and we respect them. But there are some things that we we didn't take from them. And there are some things we did. And the only things
we did was the ones that were tests passed down by love. And that's actually the shower are given to us parents in the eye of solace. Rubber ham hamaca, aka Rob Bayani So, Rob by any means when you Darby is used for growing a plant, you have to take care of the plant, you have to be delicate with it, you have to nurture it, you have to provide it soft soil, you have to remove the weeds from it. You can't yell at the plant, you can get it wordy grow already, you have to let it take its time you have to you have to see sometimes insects come and bite some of the leaves and you have to remove the insects and you cannot just you have to sometimes be a little bit harsh with it but just enough
that the insect is removed and then you have to water it again. This is us in our kids. And this is why we make that dua for our parents may Allah azza wa jal give our children the guidance that only He can give Allah put a stick on my in their hearts that they make right choices in their lives. May Allah azza wa jal make them like the dua of Ibraheem Alehissalaam that he made for all of us, his all of his lineage and all of the OMA when he said Ravi Jain, the mochi masala tea I mean the reality my rub make me someone who established a prayer and from among my children also, and may Allah take, give the parents here myself and all of you make us examples of loving Allah and loving
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Nice to meet you too. Okay, so you got to hold it here so that everybody can hear you. Okay. So tell us your name. Chris. Okay, Chris, you have already been given an explanation of the fundamentals of religion, and Alhamdulillah you've made the decision to accept Islam. And what a glorious occasion because so many people are here praying for you. And may Allah reward us also for being witness to this lesson event. I'm going to say some words in Arabic first, you're going to try to repeat them after me as clearly as you can. And we'll go over the English Okay. Ash hadoo Hadoo en en la ilaha La ilaha illallah U Allah. Excellent. Well, Ash hadoo Hadoo Anna, anna muhammadan Mohammed Abdullah,
who? Wa wa rasuluh rasuluh I testify I testify that there is no one that there is no one worthy of worship, worthy of worship, except Allah except Allah and I testify and I testify that Muhammad Muhammad is His servant is His servant and His messenger and His Messenger congratulations to you Chris. You are now Muslim Hamdulillah
I shall yak Allah. My only advice to you right now would be take a breath take this moment and and take it easy on yourself. I know everybody would want to give you a hug go easy on the hugs to this a lot of you and there's one of him so
but very happy for you and may Allah protect you and continue to grow you in this journey and not allow you to be overwhelmed. Right now your biggest enemies the devil because he hates this kind of thing. This is the biggest doba right? So just pray to Allah for protection and for you to continue to grow in your deen like I look at it summary
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