Depression Causes, Treatment, & Prevention #04 – Plus Q&A

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Ali Albarghouthi

Channel: Ali Albarghouthi

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Episode Transcript

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Salam alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

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Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah he was early he or sahbihi wa salam.

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Whereas a lot of bulahdelah mean to make this a blessitt gathering lecture and to benefit us with what we hear.

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And to make it something useful in this dunya. And in the earth here, I mean, horrible. I mean, this is the last and fourth session on depression.

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And we've had so far three sessions where we discussed the definition of it causes we discussed treatments, models, strategies to deal with depression,

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healing strategies.

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Now, before I go into prevention, so today, inshallah what we are supposed to do, I hope, ask Allah as object to make it. So we'll talk about prevention and maintenance and answer your questions.

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Before we get into that, as a kind of a conclusion to that treatment segment.

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after someone has listened to all those healing strategies and models,

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then they would say to themselves, then what should I do with all the things that I've heard?

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Where do I start?

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And so we say, insha, Allah, and this is my advice. You're either a willing or an unwilling

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suffer of depression.

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By willing I mean, someone who wants to take action knows that you have an issue, you have a problem, and you're willing to take action. The unwilling is someone who, as the name suggests, unwilling to do anything. So I'm going to first talk, we'll talk about the willing

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those who want to do something,

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those who know that there is a problem. But despite the problem, they say, I don't want to live like that. I want to feel better. That's why people go to therapists, even though they are depressed because they say I don't want to feel like that. I want to do something about it, take some action, this is the willing the willing segment of the population who are depressed. So if you are willing, what are the first steps that you could take?

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The first thing is to say, and suggest this is my recommendation. We all need to get closer to Allah if we are depressed and willing to do something about it. By by saying like, get closer to Allah, I do not mean that we previously were distant. We've discussed that issue before. What I mean by it is that we need more fuel to be able to overcome our state of depression, that we are falling into a pit and we need energy. We need something to say this. And that is only being close to Allah azza wa jal. So we need that extra boost of Eman, extra boost of energy all of us do. So whenever we are faced with a hurdle with an obstacle, you need to push harder, depression is the same so we need to

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get closer to Allah, meaning that we need that extra energy to be able to overcome this. Now, how do you get closer to Allah azza wa jal, the doors are plenty. You can do it with dhikr of Allah. You can do it with Oran. You can do it with Salah you can do it with South Africa. And if I'm already overwhelming you, that is really not my intent. I'm simply listing the many things that can be done in order to come closer to Allah azza wa jal, but I want from you to pick only one.

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One extra thing that we are going to do.

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That could be the Dhikr of Allah azza wa jal remembering Allah, which we said previously, is something that is very easy to do. It doesn't take a lot of energy from you and me, but remembering Allah, something like saying a stuff your Allah stuff, your a lot of stuff your Allah.

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And as you say it, you say it with intent. You say it with awareness.

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You say it in a time that you freed for yourself, for your soul, to feel what you're saying.

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Now, I'm going to use that example or I'm not going to liken this to meditation, not because I like the idea of meditation. But so that we understand what I mean by that. You know that when people meditate, what do they do? They sit, they relax, they take time to meditate.

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They empty their mind they think about certain things, but not other things. They devote time so that they could feel better and so that they could cope. So when we're saying remember Allah azza wa jal engaging Vic, what don't mean mindless repetition

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as much as you can. But we mean, to think about what you're saying. So when you're saying stuff you're Allah, you're asking Allah, Allah, Allah my sins, how burden me, forgive me, forgive me forgive me and keep saying these things. Or if that particular vicar doesn't resonate with you, you can use Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah or La Ilaha illa Allah La ilaha illa LA or La hawla wala Quwata illa Billah, or a combination of them. But start with the Dhikr of Allah azza wa jal, that is an option. And when I then they are not going to leave at random. So say as the field Allah, for instance, 100 times each day, after morning prayer, start like that, that's it.

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And if you are successful, and you can do this, because the intent here is not to do a lot, it's just to do a little bit, but consistently in every single day, so 100 times as the hula, after fajr prayer, or Alhamdulillah, or La Ilaha, Illa Allah or a combination you choose what speaks to you,

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but sit relaxed, and try to think about what you're saying.

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If you are successful, and you managed to do this for a week, then let's do 200 times 100 after fajr 100 After also prayer. And let's do that for another week. And if you're successful, let's do it. After three prayers, not only two but three prayers, and then four and then five. Let's build up to more towards something significant and substantial in remembering Allah azza wa jal and you will note

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that the more that you do this and the more that you concentrate, and the more that you sit with Allah azza wa jal, the better that you will feel.

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So this is how you begin. So you can choose the Quran Allah, you can choose the reading of the Quran, if you choose the Quran, I would suggest read portions of the Quran every single day.

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And beside that is your tafseer or your translation and understand what you are reading.

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You can do salah, pray intently with awareness conscious of what you're saying.

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So we want to do something daily and substantive and consistent.

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That's the first advice, get closer to Allah azza wa jal. And as you're as you succeed at something else, do it, add something else, do it, add something else to it until you feel that proximity to Allah as origin. The second is try to discover the cause of your problem based on the causes and treatments that we have discussed. What is it that is bothering you that is causing your depression? Are you lonely?

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Is it that you don't have goals in life? Is it that you have suffered loss? Is it that you have negative thoughts? Is it that you have negative assumptions? What are they? So you go back insha Allah and go through the list and then try to match that with what your own experience and pinpoint it is this and this and that. So collect that and based on the treatment, try insha Allah with the help of Allah azza wa jal every day to try to treat that stop negative thoughts, develop goals, don't be alone. So Inshallah, once you treat the causes, you'll be able to overcome that state of sadness and of depression.

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But also, that's the third point also be patient.

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Be patient, don't demand from yourself immediate results. Because even if you go to a therapist,

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is it a single visit?

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That is going to fix everything or two.

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It actually may take several visits, and several months, in addition to homework that you have to do at home.

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Till you see results still you're clear of depression. So be patient with yourself.

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And then Allah azza wa jal will give you healing, but it does take time. So don't add a burden.

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on yourself by saying I need to be cured immediately. Otherwise, I have failed. No, it does take time. Just like with physical illness, sometimes it takes time. And then you will see the effects of the healing process in sha Allah, but be patient.

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Now, if you are someone who likes to read books, read Islamic books, read Islamic biographies, read softeners of the heart,

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books on softening the hearts, the biography of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam because these books and believe it or not, this is a form of therapy that is available to all of us. It gets prescribed read books.

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So if you have if you like to read books, go and get Islamic books and read because what that does is, first of all, it takes your mind off of your problem, that's big, but also second, it increases your email. Third, it gives you insight into how to treat your problem by learning from other people's lives by learning from the Quran by learning from the Sunnah, and it does strengthen you.

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And if you discover a few reading that somebody else had went through some difficulties similar or greater than yours, you don't feel alone.

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So if you can read Islamic books,

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the fifth thing that I would recommend is Look here.

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As I said before, you don't need to go to anybody else, but on yourself for yourself, read Rukia and we discussed that and we said that this is healing also it doesn't mean that there is Jinn involved. No it doesn't mean that there is envy doesn't mean this but it does mean that I want healing and the Quran is a healing. And the idea that in the Sunnah is healing. So say that repeat it and wipe it over your body Rokia

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and also add to this da

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da and I'll share with you a specific dua when we're going to be started talking about maintenance. I'll share with you a specific dua of the prophets Allah Azza wa sallam but here I'm talking about do in general. Yeah, Allah helped me Allah heal me. Yeah, Allah helped me with my depression. Yeah, Allah helped me with the causes of my depression helped me discover what is causing it helped me deal with the triggers. Give me patience. Give me insight. Give me guidance into how to treat all of that. So keep making dua keep making dua and never give up. Never give up because as long as you're asking Allah azza wa jal, you're holding on to the cause of success to the solution itself. So keep

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asking. And rest assured when you're asking Allah azza wa jal, that in itself, that exchange itself will make you feel better. Because you're talking to someone, you're talking to Allah azza wa jal, and there's no one better to talk to, than Allah as a surgeon, better than a therapist, even though you may need people to talk to, but there's no one to talk to better than Allah as urgent. So make dua. So this is the list that I have, if you are a willing

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suffer of depression, or the person that you're helping, is willing to take actions.

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Okay?

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If you are

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unwilling,

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if you are unwilling, you don't want to do anything, or the person that you're helping trying to help or unwilling to take any steps. These are the difficult cases where you've given up or you say, I don't want to do anything.

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What we can do here is, first of all, try to convince you, me if I'm unwilling, or the person that you're helping, so just take a few steps that will not take much from you. And eventually, you're not going to lose anything. If you try. Even if you decided that nothing is going to work. This is not gonna cost you anything and who knows, it may work. Why not try it? What do you have to lose? Just try it. That's the argument. So convince them to start remembering Allah as his origin.

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or convince yourself and say, let me at least try this thing. If it doesn't work, I didn't lose anything. But if it does work, then Subhanallah I've discovered something incredible. So I stuck your luck with this.

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scribe Alhamdulillah, like we've described and see if that repetition. And if you say I'm not in the mood to sit and think about it, I just want to say it, by all means, just say it with tongue, just with tongue.

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You don't need to feel anything, but just repeat it with tongue, if that's the only thing that you can give us and give yourself, just repeat it by tongue alone.

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We hope and we ask Allah as though just that as you're trying that on one of those moments, when you are saying it, your heart will open, your heart will connect to your tongue to what you're saying, and you will feel something, and you will start feeling better. And you will have a little bit more energy, and a look a glimmer of hope. Hey, this feels nice, this feels a little bit better. Let me do more of this.

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So the only thing that you can convince them of or you can convince yourself to do is just say vicar of Allah, by tongue alone, even you don't feel like it. That's fine. Just say it. Because as we said, it may work. So that's the step that I would recommend in addition to do

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what are you convinced? What do you convince yourself of the view of belong to the unwilling whether you convince yourself to make dua for yourself, or the one who's trying to help you making dua for you do? Ya Allah, you know that they are suffering you Allah, you know that they would do it if they could, but they cannot Allah help them with this and keep making that to

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keep making that dua. And if you're taking care of someone, especially if that someone is really dear to you, that someone is your child.

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Right?

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Or someone very close to you.

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But especially if it's your child, and you're the parent, father and mother.

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Making do out for them also means that you have to change your life in order for their life to change.

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As sometimes, and this has happened, you know, a couple of times where parents bring their children, and the children have anxiety and depression and this and that. And you know that the children have to do certain things to improve. But you also look at the parents and the way that they've raised them and the way that they're living at this moment. And you say to yourself, and then you say to them, you also need to change.

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It's not just simply they need to do with something, no, you also need to read Quran more to help them, you also need to make a lot of dua to help them remember Allah to be able to help them, wake up before Federer and make dua that bless it time to be able to help the meaning you have to change your life in order to be able to help. So sometimes as the helper, you need to also change to be able to help, especially if you're a parent. So if you're a parent and your children are going through any kind of mental issues, help mental health issues, please know that it's not simply giving them medication or putting them on medication. It's not simply taking them to an imam or

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therapist, and they deal with it on their own know you're part of the issue as well. So you also need to change. And if you fail to change, then that means that you know you're failing them. So please keep that in mind. Specially if you're a parent, or someone who's close to someone and you love them, but you want them to change you want them to be cured, understand that you need to change as well. So again, going back to the unwilling, we said they could have Allah azza wa jal do for them if they cannot do it for themselves. Or do it for yourself, if you are willing to do it at least that

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if you're the helper, try to employ multiple strategies, the models that we talked about to be able to locate the source of their problem. What is it that they're suffering from? Why is it that they feel this way? What preceded that episode of depression, if they could talk to you, talk to them and try to find out if they can open up. If none of these things work with time you need expert help.

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You need to take them to someone who knows about depression, and has had preferably a Muslim,

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a Muslim because you want to balance deen and dunya Islamic knowledge with psychological knowledge so that the person who's trying to help they only have secular background don't give the advice that conflicts with religion. You want a deeper understanding of a Muslim state of mind the human state of mind and you will not be able

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To access that information, based on experimentation alone, you need the insight that comes from the Quran and Sunnah to understand the human mind and heart properly. So a Muslim psychologist is the Best in Show. Now somebody asked about medication, meaning that the specific question was, he was on medication, and he wants to get off his meds, and he wants therapy, etc, etc. So we, we say that if you're on medication, don't stop taking your medication, without consulting with your doctor who prescribed this.

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Now, if you have listened to these lectures, and you go through what we've talked about, and you start treating yourself and you start feeling better, and you think you can do better,

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and you don't need these medications as much, go back to your doctor, consult with them, and tell them that you want to wean yourself off of them. And start the process under their supervision so that you don't you know, suffer from the consequences of early withdrawal, or consequences of going you know, off your meds without being ready for it.

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So, yes, you can,

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you don't necessarily need to go to a therapist, but if you feel the need to go to a therapist, consult with your doctor, consult with a trusted, knowledgeable person around you a professional and tell them that you need to see a therapist, preferably somebody who is also a Muslim.

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And they'll direct you in sha Allah to them, and you'll be able to visit while you're still on your meds, but also what we knew yourself off of them supervised, okay, so I do not recommend you just simply stop taking them if you've been taking meds for a period of time, inshallah. So I hope that that

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is helpful.

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Now, I want to move in Sharla talk about maintenance, what do we mean by maintenance, maintenance is what and Hamdulillah, you have successfully exited that state of depression, you're not depressed anymore, and you feel a lot better. Now, the fact that you feel better now does not mean that you're not going to suffer from another episode of depression later on, if the triggers are there.

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If you suffer another loss, another perceived failure, something else happens, pressures of life, you find yourself alone again, anyway, you might find yourself depressed again. So if you want to avoid that, what do you do?

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You maintain that maintenance, you maintain you be vigilant about

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your mental health, your moods, your Eman so that you don't get depressed again. Right. And even Subhanallah, even if you were to visit a therapist, that therapist would give you, homework will give you things to watch out for. So that you don't fall into depression again, and they will be maintenance, maybe even maintenance visits, every three months, four months, six months a year so that you don't fall back into the same old habits that had caused the depression state. So we need to be, make sure that we're undepressed we meet we remained and depressed. So how do we do this? So first of all, and always the worship of Allah azza wa jal to worship Allah azza wa jal, because

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that's the anchor. If you if you think of our life as a boat, right, and then the

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unpredictable events in our lives and our moods or whatever are like the waves of the sea, unless we have an anchor to keep us in place, the sea will swallow us. That's what depression is. This is what the Dounia is, it will swallow us, it will destroy us. So we need anchors, what are the anchors that we have in our lives, the things that are permanent that are fixed, that at least I can say I have that I can lean on that I can trust this? What are they?

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So the best anchor is Allah azza wa jal is the worship of Allah as diligent and it's all the things that we talked about. So you keep a daily regimen of reading the Quran, of the vicar of Allah azza wa jal in the morning after fajr prescribed there is recommended thicker you keep that

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you maintain

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it after after federal after us or before you go to bed. These are important ones, so that they could have Allah Zojila as often as you can as and as we said, after the Salah.

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And then to pray the five daily prayers to pray with intention.

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Pray with awareness, pray with a purpose.

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That is if you feel sad.

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And here, it's important to monitor your state of mind. Monitor your mood, monitor your patterns, because we have patterns by the way, some of you and you and you as you monitor yourself, you'll understand those patterns. I always fall into this pattern. I get sad when these things happen. I get anxious when these things happen. I always fall into these negative patterns of thoughts. When you study yourself. If you observe yourself, you'll notice a pattern. So when you understand those patterns, you'll understand that when you're about to get sad, you need Salah

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you know, Jani someone like the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the Prophet of Allah was the closest to Allah can either Hazara whom, if something distresses him, he would go to sada.

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So here you have a remedy coming not from me, or a therapist or a philosopher, coming from a prophet, the best prophet of Allah

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to tell you that when something would disturb him, he would go to Salah he'll find his solace his peace, in Salah. He would say to be Dalia Bilal Rihanna, be here. bring comfort to us through salah, meaning when he calls the event. Right? He's waiting for it. Yeah, Bilal bring us comfort. So when you find yourself not at peace, the whispers of the shaytaan are coming back.

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You're feeling down, then to ruckus or solitude or or solitude as we say. I'm gonna talk to Allah azza wa jal in my salah. So we have to learn to lean on our worship, to medicate ourselves.

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Right to medicate ourselves. We need that worship of Allah azza wa jal. In addition, of course, to see we talked about if God oran Sada, there's also sadaqa. Right, just to give money to treat yourself. Here's $5 $10 $100 with the intention of treating myself physically and also psychologically and emotionally. So the worship of Allah azza wa jal

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and also focus on religious social activities, religious activities that have a social component to them. So volunteering for Islamic work, going to Salah in the masjid, Juma prayer, attending Halaqa us, virtually, yes, Alhamdulillah that's good, but also physically, if you can, book clubs, whatever it is, but you're with other Muslims, learning and studying and teaching, but you see them and they see you. That is really important in maintaining your mental health and your proximity, how close you are to Allah Azzawajal. Right. And remember, like we said about meditation, remember, when people meditate, they are present and aware, in our Salah in our ibadah, we need to be present and

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aware for that to benefit us. And the more that you invest, the more that you will get back in it. So this is how you maintain your Eman and you push away the whispers of the Shaitaan. And you keep yourself strong, righteous company also, that's another another way to maintain

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a state when you're not or you're not depressed and safe from depression. have religious

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people around you righteous company, good company, find them if you don't have them, as we said, ask Allah for them.

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And also he said an emphasize again, monitor your thoughts, patterns and mood.

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Don't let yourself go without examining how you have felt today. If you have felt sad, why? If you have felt anxious, why? If you're sliding towards a path that you know eventually will lead into

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depression. Why are you sliding? How could you stop yourself? If you're comparing yourself to other people stop and say to yourself, This is how it starts. I'm going to stop if you're ruminating over what a person has said to you. And you know that this is not very helpful.

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Stop it, right and go back and treat yourself and say to yourself that this is not helpful, and ask Allah to help you against it. But again, monitor the triggers and understand your personality, just like and I give these examples, again, only for clarification. So if you're trying, let's say, to lose weight, and I'm not asking anybody to do that, or be be so obsessed about their body image, but in kg, but just so that we understand, you know, they experience and when it comes to mental health, imagine that you're trying to lose weight. What do you do? You intently every day do something to work towards that objective. So you see how many calories you're taking in? How many calories you're

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consuming, and you monitor your weight, you stand on the scale every not maybe not every day, but every week? or what have you just to monitor your progress.

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You know, if if we do this to keep our bodies healthy, we need to do the same and more to keep our souls healthy. So take inventory of your day. How was it? What happened? Why are you sad? Why are you anxious? Why are you this? Why are you that and then treat all of that early, and treat your negative thoughts early and treat any

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depression inclination very early. So that's how Insha Allah, you'll be able to maintain good mental health and what's going to help you it's going to give you that energy and insight is your worship of Allah xojo. Right.

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And give your soul the time that it needs to be nourished and heal just like your body. We sit down and we eat breakfast, right? We don't allow other things to interrupt our consumption. And then we sit in we eat our lunch, we sit we eat our dinner, right? We drink.

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We hydrate This is all for the sake of the body. Okay, what about the soul? It needs time from you every day to just to sit and he'll just relax.

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Just to feel better, to be nourished. And you have to give it food and it's food is not chicken and rice. Its food is what remembrance of Allah azza wa jal thinking about Allah thinking about the hereafter, you just feel better when that happens. So keep that in mind. And then also treat the causes of your depression. If you have were able to find out why you get depressed, treat those causes, and maintain maybe even a diary or a schedule that you monitor why you get to pressed and what you're doing about it.

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And how you are stopping it. When you do this insha Allah Allah Allah Allah mean and with the help of Allah and yeah, and I this this is a point I was almost about to forget to mention, but it's important to

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do.

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So the particular draw that I wanted to share with you and what it was what I do out of the prophets a lot he was telling himself, a llama India or the becoming a lamb mule hasn't. Well, I just say, well, Kishan will Gibney. Well Bolton was elevated in our water like they need we're gonna battle region, okay my god so Allah Allah wa sallam, it says, Yeah, Allah I seek your refuge, your protection from him and hasn't from worry and sadness. That's the part that I want you to focus on that this you're asking Allah as the Prophet himself said, Yeah, Allah protect me from worry and sadness.

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So you make that your own DUA

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and then the rest of the DUA insha Allah is there you can inshallah read the translation, but the one that I want to focus on is that the prophets Allah, Allah wa sallam said, Yeah, Allah Hama, India older became meaner, and Han me What hasn't protect me from worry and sadness. And if Allah protects you from worry, worrying about the future and sadness about the past, then Allah azza wa jal had effectively protected you from depression.

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Right? So make that your constant do if you are someone who's prone to becoming depressed. This is your medication. To ask Allah azza wa jal through that authentic draft from the prophets, a lot of you send them to protect you.

00:34:36--> 00:34:37

So do right

00:34:38--> 00:34:59

now that's maintenance. So understand maintenance is to maintain your good mental health to be undepressed after an episode of depression, prevention is to stop it from ever happening. So you did not get depressed and you don't want to ever be depressed. So you want to stop it from her

00:35:00--> 00:35:11

happening. How do you do this? Well, first of all, you have to understand that if Allah has said it had blessed you with the fact that you never got depressed, it doesn't mean that you will not in the future.

00:35:12--> 00:35:47

Because with all of life's pressures, it is more likely for people today to get depressed. It's not necessary. You may never get it, may you never get it mean. But it is more likely today than in the past. So how do you stop it from ever happening? Through the maintenance that we talked about? All the things that we talked about? It when we listed maintenance, worship of Allah azza wa jal monitoring your moods, understanding what could trigger your sadness and worry dealing with that all of these things

00:35:49--> 00:36:29

are used in prevention of depression. So if you can, you know Insha Allah, and when do I also as well? Yeah, Allah protect me from it. So we have to take it seriously because it could happen, and you don't want it to happen. So stop it. So stay close to Allah azza wa jal, and pray to Allah to protect you from it. And if case there is something, you have some whispers of the shaytaan, you deal with them. Negative thoughts, again, dismantle those negative thoughts through that we talked about, you want to feel sad, remind yourself that the prophets always sell them sought protection from it, and try to

00:36:30--> 00:36:47

take a while to take yourself away from it. You want to worry about the future. You say the future is in the hands of Allah azza wa jal, worrying about tomorrow, tomorrow doesn't make any sense. Because you don't know how tomorrow will unveil itself to be what exactly will happen tomorrow. It's only known to Allah as his origin.

00:36:48--> 00:37:16

So there's no sense in worrying about tomorrow. And if you're worried about your income, your provisions your job, say all of that is also in the hands of Allah as so rather than worry about it. I'll ask Allah as Jeff to provide for me, and I'll do my best. But I'll ask Allah azza wa jal to fill my heart with serenity and security because everything is in his hand. When you say these things to yourself, and you read them in the Quran, they will help.

00:37:18--> 00:37:25

So inshallah I want to come to some of your questions. So some of your questions already have been answered as we are presenting.

00:37:27--> 00:37:55

Our segments, and our episodes have already been answered, but some of these questions have not. So one question was about the link between depression and anxiety? Is there a link between them, and I know that we didn't talk specifically about anxiety, but anyway, yes, there is a link between them. So if you think about depression and anxiety, both of them as forms of mental anguish and discomfort,

00:37:57--> 00:38:47

if you have one, it can predict it can not necessarily the case, but it can predict that the other could develop as well. So if you have anxiety, anxiety could lead to depression or depression can lead to anxiety. The good thing is that much of what we said about depression can apply to anxiety as well. So the way that you treat the causes and also the way that you treat can apply also to to anxiety. So if you're someone who's suffering from anxiety, you can inshallah benefit from what we said about depression insha Allah the things about do about taking active steps about monitoring your thoughts about countering these thoughts all insha Allah will be very helpful when dealing with

00:38:47--> 00:38:49

anxiety in Shell

00:38:51--> 00:39:08

there's a sister who had asked that she has these negative thoughts or whispers and they're causing her a lot of anxiety and they seem to intensify in the bathroom. Alright when someone when when relieving yourself

00:39:09--> 00:39:24

so to that we say that if that's the case, then that is a strong indication that these are whispers from the JSON and Allah knows best. So that two ways to deal with this

00:39:25--> 00:39:31

general way a general way and a specific way. The general way is what

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general way is before you enter the bathroom,

00:39:37--> 00:39:53

you see the Vic vilazodone Bismillah he Allahumma India oh the we came in all hope to Aqaba if your Allah I seek Your protection from male and female gin so you understand that you are asking Allah protect me from them.

00:39:54--> 00:39:59

And once you enter the bathroom, you're on the toilet you only spend as much time as you need

00:40:00--> 00:40:14

And then you leave you don't stay for an extended time there. Thinking ruminating daydreaming you don't do this in and out only as much as you need and nothing more.

00:40:15--> 00:40:21

And when you're on the toilet right? Remember Allah azza wa jal with your heart

00:40:22--> 00:40:38

say with your heart, a stuffer Allah esta fue Allah as the hula Alhamdulillah to chase away the whispers of the shaytaan stuck through Allah Al Hamdulillah. Allah is Allah with heart is allowed with tongue is not but with your heart that is allowed.

00:40:39--> 00:40:55

So if you seek Allah's protection before you go in, remember Allah azza wa jal while and then also leave as quickly as you can. And remember Allah as they did when you leave and then keep asking Allah assertive to protect you from the whispers of the shaitaan

00:40:56--> 00:41:04

and do what we talked about with depression. Then I ask Allah azza wa jal to cure that

00:41:05--> 00:41:18

illness that you have to take your anxiety and depression away. That's general, why do I call this general we do because we did not deal specifically with the content of those whispers.

00:41:19--> 00:41:22

We're just asking Allah as though to just to take them away.

00:41:25--> 00:41:36

Now, if that doesn't work, this still what he is whispering to you what the Shaitaan is whispering to you, is still is bothering you. Then you need to take the content of what he's whispering

00:41:38--> 00:41:45

to a learned person, an Imam, a chef, and you say, I have these ideas that come to mind?

00:41:46--> 00:41:48

How can I counter them?

00:41:49--> 00:42:22

Right. So if they don't go away, have these thoughts do not go away. If these whispers do not diminish with that general treatment, then you need to take these specific thoughts to an Imam and say, I have these whispers about that, you know, I'm not a good person, that I'm a failure that I'm this. So that the Imam, the learned person can tell you no, this is not true. And this is how you counter it. And this is what Allah said, This is what the Prophet said, so that you would believe what Allah and the Prophet are saying, and disbelieve the whispers of the Shaitaan. And you will not pay attention to them.

00:42:23--> 00:42:46

So that is my recommendation. General, if the general does not work, then the specific but when I'm saying general, it's not just a one day or a two day or a one week treatment. Keep doing it, keep at it, keep asking Allah azza wa jal and keep fighting the shaitaan. And as long as you are struggling with the shaytaan, you are in a state of jihad.

00:42:48--> 00:43:01

I'll repeat that. As long as you're struggling with the Shavon and fighting with the shaitaan you're in a state of jihad. And Allah rewards you for that state, because he understand how your troubles

00:43:02--> 00:43:15

and how much effort you are putting trying to push away the shaytaan. So as long as you are fighting, you will win be Nilla Zildjian. The problem is that if you give up but as long as you're fighting, keep fighting,

00:43:16--> 00:43:37

keep fighting, and ask Allah azza wa jal for help. So if you do that general treatment, and then whispers go away, and Hamdu lillahi rabbil aalameen keep doing the same thing. If it doesn't, then you need to see someone. So go to a loner person, go to an imam go to a shave, who knows about these things. That's why I emphasize learning.

00:43:38--> 00:44:03

And then tell him this, this, this, this this and inshallah we'll be able to give you a sound and good and helpful reply Bismillah xojo. If that still does not help, maybe then you need to see a psychologist, again, emphasize a Muslim psychologists will be able to help you. But I hope that you don't need to go that far. You will be able to deal with this on your own or at least with the help of an email.

00:44:08--> 00:44:48

There's another question is about can I play a recording of vicar or Salawat? To help me so I want to remember Allah azza wa jal. I'm finding it's hard I can't concentrate but there's a already a recorded dhikr of Allah or a Salawat of the prophets Allah Allah us ultimates already recorded. Can I play that? And repeat or follow? You see, yes, you can. Yes, you can. But make sure first of all, that the vicar there is a legitimate dhikr of Allah. So nothing that is innovated. Subhan Allah Alhamdulillah Allah you know Allah, Allah Akbar, the legitimate dhikr of Allah, or the evening and morning of God.

00:44:49--> 00:44:59

All that is reported authentic or Salawat Allahumma Salli ala Muhammad Ali Mohammed. So you play that without music background, because you don't want us

00:45:00--> 00:45:23

Music in the background, you're trying to treat your soul and you want to treat your soul with an Islamic medication music is not that. So there's no music in the background, and you're just reading the Salawat or reading the F God, this could be helpful in sha Allah. So yes, you can do this. And the advantage of that is, when you don't have the motivation, they can motivate you.

00:45:24--> 00:45:54

Because you just play and you follow, and it goes on for 10 minutes or 20 minutes or half an hour. So you're just simply following and since you're following, it's easier to do it because it's already set and done for you rather than you having to watch the clock and say, Oh, how many? Do I have to do it for five minutes have to do it 10 minutes seems too long. So if need if you need that to help you then why not and there are available online vailable on YouTube, so you can find that inshallah.

00:45:55--> 00:46:03

So somebody is asking, I am depressed and but I also think that I am possessed or this is magic or what have you.

00:46:05--> 00:46:43

I say that if you think or if you believe that you're possessed, or there's magic or you're under the influence of magic, go to a trusted Islamic scholar and present that to them and have them assess your case and read oran I'm talking about a lucky Islamic scholar, a legitimate person who doesn't deal with magic doesn't deal with jinn, purely based on the Quran and Sunnah. Go to them, present your case and say I believe that there is magic I believe I'm possessed, love them assess, let them treat and let them tell you whether you are or not.

00:46:44--> 00:47:25

And maybe in sha Allah in. In the near future, I hope in sha Allah, I could just have one session, one lecture on the intersection on the connection between depression anxiety, mental health state and the effects of the chiffon possession magic and Vienna, what have you, so maybe we'll do inshallah a lecture about that. To clarify the issue when it comes to what could stand behind depression? Is it always can it always be? Or is it always or is it sometimes possession of the Shavon? Is it sometimes envy? Is it sometimes magic so maybe we'll have inshallah electro about that being the last soldier

00:47:32--> 00:47:43

you're asking me about someone that I don't know. So ask her what do you think of Hani? I don't I don't know who that person is. So I'm sorry, I cannot help you. Right? Because I don't know who that person is.

00:47:47--> 00:48:11

Someone is asking as salaam alaikum. Just asking if you practice any abetted during nutso such a devoted time during commuting to work walking daily, or incentive does this mean it does not count to healing? And how do you notice feel that you have escaped from depression. So you will know that you've escaped from depression when you don't feel hopeless anymore.

00:48:12--> 00:48:23

When you have hope, again, when you can smile, we can plan for tomorrow. When you believe that there is hope, then you're not depressed.

00:48:24--> 00:49:07

This is basically it. So it may come gradually. But when you start seeing glimmers of hope that you can improve, that you're dealing with the triggers with the causes, and you're winning, you're about to exit via Nilla xojo Not you may not be free 100%. You may or you may have residue for some time, but that's fine. That's fine. It sometimes takes a while for us to be completely healthy. But at the same time, you're not completely depressed. You're doing something about it. You can eat you can enjoy food, you can enjoy conversations, you can go outside and enjoy your

00:49:09--> 00:49:40

out of home activities in home activities. When you can enjoy when you can have fun again when you smile. That means that you're not depressed you could be sad, little still a little bit sad, but you're not depressed. So that's how you know it says if you practice a better when you're not really devoted time meaning maybe you're not concentrating in your during commute, commuting to work walking daily errands does this mean that it does not count to healing? No, we say do what you can

00:49:41--> 00:49:49

see no remember Allah azza wa jal with heart and tongue. If you can't with heart, at least with tongue

00:49:51--> 00:49:53

does that mean that it doesn't count? No, it counts.

00:49:55--> 00:49:59

It counts because sometimes especially when you are just beginning

00:50:00--> 00:50:19

Your journey, you know, on the path to Allah azza wa jal or coming back to after a period of depression or anxiety, or sometimes you just burdened by life and you don't have that energy within. And that devotion attachment to Eva. So you're saying what?

00:50:20--> 00:50:32

Stuff for loss or for loss of Hannah, Allah Subhanallah, Subhanallah Subhanallah Are you praying, but your mind is not in it doesn't mean that that prayer doesn't help. That vicar doesn't help. No, it does help.

00:50:33--> 00:50:39

And the fact that wood proves to you that it helps is that first of all, that prayer counts.

00:50:41--> 00:50:47

Even though I mean, you're not you're not present, but you've done it physically, that prayer counts.

00:50:48--> 00:51:02

Right? You fulfilled an obligation. And when you pray, and you continue to pray, one of those times you'll find yourself in your sujood actually getting closer to Allah and feeling a connection.

00:51:03--> 00:51:11

One of those times when you sing Allah Who acaba you'll feel Allahu Akbar, when you read al Fatiha, you will feel something there.

00:51:12--> 00:51:21

That's because it has had an effect on you. So when we say you, when you say for instance, let's say you're walking, preparing food, for your kids,

00:51:22--> 00:52:04

running between, you know, shopping and groceries, and and you're saying and stuff will last for last for Allah does this mean that it doesn't count, it does count because you're putting an effort. And one of those times when you're seeing it, you're going to feel something. And that's what we want. We want effort. We want Allah as though to be present around this on our tongues. And when we do that, it will find it sweet our heartbeat does. So it does count in sha Allah, Allah Allah me. So that's what we want. Even the smallest of effort, that's what we want even the smallest of effort. Because a you're doing what you're coming closer to Allah. And you have to feel that if you if Allah

00:52:04--> 00:52:48

allows you, just to remember him, just to get closer to him. He did that because he wants to be closer to you. That in itself should put you in Subhanallah in an ecstatic mood, you'll be so incredibly happy. Allah chose you to remember his name shows you to make dua because he wants to answer it. Because he loves to hear your voice, just that, that it wouldn't if you say to that now just now. And you're and you're tired and you're depressed and you're sad, but if you just say a stuck Fula right now, if Allah had allowed you to say that it means that Allah wants to forgive you, why would he inspire you to see stuff your Allah, if not to forgive you and bring you closer to him?

00:52:48--> 00:53:14

So now you've been chosen if you believe that it will have an effect on you. So always believe that when you do something that is pleasing to Allah, that Allah led you to it and Allah wants that from you know, Allah loves you because of it. That's how you start to heal quickly when you know that Allah azza wa jal is watching you as in and is in embracing you at this moment. Ask Allah azza wa jal to make it so.

00:53:17--> 00:53:40

This is a question here about seeing is the other in case someone has husband with short temper who complains every time the wife says calmly and quietly but audibly out Willa. He min ash shaytani R regime and says she is being offensive and tries to get her to stop. Okay. So the question here is basically that

00:53:41--> 00:53:50

an understanding here that they would have a fight, let's say, That's my understanding, but even if not, it will still apply, but I'm understanding and I understand that

00:53:52--> 00:54:10

example, you have a fight with your husband or he begins to raise his voice. He say I owe the biller administrator Donna Raji, right. She's quietly she says, She's quiet, she's calm, but it's audible. The husband hears it and he thinks that you're being offensive, because he's angry already.

00:54:11--> 00:54:14

And he asked her to stop. So what should she do?

00:54:16--> 00:54:30

If you know that, that is his reaction, and he misinterprets it to me and maybe that he's being pushed by the shaytaan it doesn't have to be audible you don't have to say it in a way that

00:54:31--> 00:54:37

you know, if you don't see that to see it in front of him, when he hears it, say to yourself

00:54:39--> 00:54:44

say it I mean if not, if not possible in your heart Oh the villain the sheath on you.

00:54:45--> 00:54:54

Or you turn away for instance, in a in a non unnoticeable non noticeable fashion you turn away or when you turn away,

00:54:55--> 00:54:59

or you say it, you know, in a way that you know he's not going to hear

00:55:01--> 00:55:02

When you say

00:55:03--> 00:55:06

that's, you're saying it to help yourself.

00:55:07--> 00:55:22

But if for instance, you know, if someone is angry, and you want to tell him it tequila have to have Allah as a relief, you know that that is going to make him angrier, then you know that that's not the thing to say, you have to be quiet.

00:55:23--> 00:55:34

There's something else to be said to him, or you don't say anything until they calm down. So if saying, Oh, we live in a shaitana regime is going to trigger your husband's anger,

00:55:36--> 00:56:21

or your wife's anger or anybody's anger, then you do what? You know, you either correct their understanding by saying I'm not, I don't mean by it, that you are shaytaan I mean, by that the shaitaan is present and I want him to go away. If he can understand that, then handleable Allah mean, you know, you no need to be offended when that is tiada is mentioned is repeated. But if he fails to understand that you don't need to trigger him, just say it to yourself in sha Allah or when he's when he's away. So he does not become angry when you say, the purpose of it is what to chase the shaitaan away and when you say the shaitaan will go away, and then you can make dua for your

00:56:21--> 00:56:34

husband so that he can understand why you're saying you could try to explain it. But if he does not listen, you can make dua for Allah azza wa jal to open his heart so that he understands it. Right. Well,

00:56:35--> 00:56:37

so as far as I,

00:56:38--> 00:56:50

as far as I can tell, we've answered your questions. And have the lotto bill. I mean, the questions that I've received here Oh, okay. Okay, so I've got a couple more here. Okay. So I was mistaken.

00:56:53--> 00:57:08

If I want to perform a staccato prayer due to something that I have to choose is causing me mental and mentally, mentally unbearable? Is it a good time to perform the prayer during the tough state or clears the mind?

00:57:11--> 00:57:12

So

00:57:14--> 00:57:26

what I understand from your question is that you need to make a choice, and you need to praise the Hara. But you're sometimes in a state where you are really agitated do really disturb.

00:57:27--> 00:57:47

And sometimes you have clarity of mind, peace of mind, sometimes peace of mind, somebody or sometimes you're agitated. So that's what I understand from your question. If you have these two states, then probably and best is to perform that Salah when you're calm, not when you're disturbed.

00:57:48--> 00:57:52

But either way, by the way, either way, you're asking Allah Zoji

00:57:53--> 00:58:04

you're asking Allah and that is, is the Hara. By the way, it doesn't mean that you're deciding right at the spot. What to do, is the Hara is saying, Yeah, Allah guide me.

00:58:06--> 00:58:17

So if you're calm, you balance and you can make that dua hamdulillahi rabbil, aalameen, do it. But if you're agitated, you find yourself more agitated than

00:58:18--> 00:59:06

comfortable, then it feasts then that it should not even stop you. Just make that dua because you're not trying to decide. You're asking Allah help me decide. Then Allah azza wa jal will open doors and close others. This is how you know so whether you're in a state that is agitated or not, you can pray istikhara right. You can pray a staccato inshallah. But what I said what I say is that if you're more if you're more balanced, if you're more comfortable mentally then that is probably a better state. Right? But if not, that's not easy to find. And you're just constantly agitated constantly constantly worried, constantly anxious just freeze too hard on whatever state you are in

00:59:07--> 00:59:07

lower

00:59:16--> 00:59:17

okay

00:59:19--> 00:59:23

okay, so this question about is about multiple wives and

00:59:26--> 00:59:42

but many men are just struggling with the basics of prayers and not even being calm with one wife. And okay, so let's let's answer that question at a later date in sha Allah, because this is just about depression. I don't want it to be about

00:59:43--> 00:59:48

other topic. I don't want to go off topic. So I just want to be about depression and mental health. So

00:59:49--> 00:59:55

somebody who's recommending multiple wives and what have you, I want that to be at a different time in sha Allah.

00:59:57--> 01:00:00

What would my response be if my husband keeps saying that Allah

01:00:00--> 01:00:03

I have said that wife has to be okay, another one.

01:00:04--> 01:00:45

Okay, so I don't I only want to answer questions and shall I understand your questions are important and valuable inshallah and I will try to answer them in the Laszlo gel at a later session. But I want this only be about depression because it's people who are struggling with that will be watching this whole thing, right hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen barik ala freecom. So people are struggling with mental health issues, we'll be watching these things. I don't want it to be about something else. So please forgive me if I don't answer your question. If it's off topic on sha Allah, I will try to keep a note of it and answer it at another time in sha Allah, Allah me. So

01:00:46--> 01:01:35

I just want to announce a couple of announcements that I want to make in sha Allah next week, because we've concluded this series next week insha Allah there will be a lecture called everlasting love but it will not be on this channel. It will be on the our corner channel on their Facebook and YouTube channel. So we'll be talking about everlasting love. And we'll be discussing also the book this is love. So this will be on Saturday for us here in Toronto will be Saturday at 8pm. For Malaysia, it will be 9am in the morning, Sunday morning. So 9am Sunday morning Malaysia time, the title of the lecture is everlasting love insha Allah I'll post the flyer on social media in sha

01:01:35--> 01:02:10

Allah, Allah Allah I mean that's going to be for us here. Sunday night, I'm sorry, Saturday night, Sunday morning for Malaysia. There's another lecture in sha Allah that will be Sunday night for us here at 7pm. And it will be Valentine's Day and the meaning of love. Again, I will post that on sha Allah on say on social media. So Toronto time 7pm Sunday, it will be Valentine's Day and the meaning of love and share a lot of bit Alamy so just wanted to make those announcements and Vartika Lo Fi comm I hope that you have found in the series,

01:02:11--> 01:02:21

answers to your questions about depression, mental health issues, how to get better mental health states, especially focused on

01:02:23--> 01:03:07

religious healing. It's not just simply healing, but religious healing because true healing is healing that comes from Allah azza wa jal ask Allah, Allah, Allah mean to make this in the scale of our good deeds on the Day of Judgment, to make a sincere in our actions to make us of those who benefit and help people whereas Kim subhanho wa Taala to heal us all of our illness, physical and otherwise mental emotional, so your Allah Hara but I mean, if there's anyone who's watching this series now, or watch it later, who was suffering from depression, we asked her but allow me to assist them, whereas you take away their suffering, if they are suffering from anxiety, any type of

01:03:07--> 01:03:53

mental health issue, whereas here will allow me to take away that burden, that sickness away from them, and to replace it with ease with healing with serenity, with your love with Eman and with Rama was curable al Amin to keep us safe in this dunya and in the akhira was Sheila Bella Alameen to keep us happy in this dunya and in the Africa, guide us to the straight path and help us follow with Dr. hamre. I mean, he'll RCR up and fill our fill our hearts with your love, the love of your Prophet and the love of the believers renew our Eman keep us close to you and save us from the whispers of the Shaitaan save us from sorrow save us from worry save us from the whispers of the Shaitaan I

01:03:53--> 01:03:55

mean, I mean I mean era but Allah mean

01:03:57--> 01:04:19

we conclude by saying Subhanak llama will be handed a shadow Illa Illa Illa and a stir Fuuka to hoylake hamdu lillahi rabbil aalameen We will see you next week in sha Allah, it's a different lecture, everlasting love, open sha Allah you'll be able to join us but BarakAllahu li Walakum wa salaamu alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

01:04:23--> 01:04:32

insha Allah I will share all of that inshallah on social media and shall be Mila Baraka la Feeco a Salaam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh