Motivation For Change

We're speaking today all about in the spirit of the beautiful man from headroom, the spirit of change. We speaking about motivation for change and having appreciation for what we have. And I would like to warmly welcome sisters reservoir to the show today. Assalamu alaikum sisters what exactly so much for being here?

Thank you for having me. You most welcome just reading your biography again. It's amazing. Everything about you absolutely amazing. You're very very busy woman. How's life treating us this desert essence the last time we spoke?

The last time the law test kavango.

Always Allah Subhana Allah gives us those tears, but we do shine through them. Sisters, what are we speaking today all about motivation for change, having appreciation for what we have centered around the year 1432 fuzzy, you know, I might say to you in a new year's panela a year for change. So for those who are willing or looking to make changes in their lives, what tips may you have for those people?

Do I have three tips I like to give inshallah, the first tip I like to give is to reconnect with a loss of power of Allah. This is one of the best ways for people to even want to change is defining their connection with a loss of one fella. And one of the best ways to do that people go Okay, so that's a great idea. But how do I reconnect with a loved one. And one of the best ways I recommend is by knowing the entire meaning of the salon. So when you're doing prayer, when you're actually praying the Muslim salon, you know what you're saying? And you're connecting with Allah subhanaw taala, what you're asking for, and, you know, each step is really like a connection with him. And I

think that is just phenomenal. And that is something we are actually doing in with my family right now. Every night we go through the diocese, and we're going through this a lot, so that way inshallah so when we're praying, we're just, yeah, understand it at a different level. Does that make any sense? That is absolutely beautiful. It makes a lot of sense. It's connecting with Allah subhanaw taala. Like you said, it's and I had somebody speaking about this earlier on in the week as well. It's about talking to the Almighty, it's about you having this relationship and having that connection, which I think is fantastic.

Absolutely. The second tip that I have, is that making sure that you're working on your character daily, by being aware of what is your weaknesses, for example, let's just say somebody has a bad temper, and they yell, and so the weakness is yelling. So working on not yelling and being able to be more patient and calm and working on their character flaws. If someone has a bad habit of using foul language, how do they change those words and use different words? So working on their character daily, not monthly, not yearly, but daily, paying attention and trying to change it? And of course, we're human, we make errors, but being aware and trying to change that inshallah. I mean, that is

very true. And I think a number one thing with that as well is acknowledging what your bad habits are, you know, saying that I admit that I have a bad habit of lying or gossiping, or whatever the case may be, and saying that you wanted to change that. So admittances Well, why step number three says desira

separate the three is making sincere blah, while you're taking the action to change inshallah, sitting there going into June, being with a lot of about making one thing Yala, you, it for you, everything is easy. Please help me change this habit. Please give me good character, give me good manners, give me good, whatever it is they want. And for someone who wants to lose weight, you asked him once and surely Yala helped me gain my health back. Sincerely asking for a lot of help and blah, making that block for him. So then you take the action? What are some of our He blesses it and help you along the way? I mean, that's fantastic ideas. But with that, also, a lot of people have that

motivation that yes, it's new year now. subpanel assamica, we into the year 1432, the English calendar, we're going to be into 2011 in a couple of days time as well. So in the beginning of the year, everybody is all set and gung ho, and they're going to be changing their lives. And I know I remember speaking to someone at the gym once and the managers and they say to me, that the number they make the most money in January, because now like you said, losing weight and asking Allah subhanaw taala to give you health back, that's when people say, Well, I'm going to do this, I'm going to start jumping again. I'm going to eat healthy again. But the number one problem again, the

is that people most people don't have consistency. So for those who struggle with their consistency, what advice can you offer to them?

I would say don't make it too difficult. start off small, you know, for example, I mean, if you want to lose weight exercises, just start off with 10 minutes a day, that's it, and maybe inshallah, cut something out like one soda, you know, or something extra that you're eating that you can cut up the sort of small and then as you get stronger increases a little bit a little bit until until after you can handle more. This will make you consistent because you know that you can handle only 10 minutes of the day exercises. So that's not for you. Not pushing yourself to 30 minutes or 40

Keep it at a lower level, but do it everyday inshallah Allah Ameen. So as long as you're doing something every single day. So for instance, with the Lazarus disorder, if some people have difficulty with reading all five of this law, what advice would you have for that in the spiritual context?

I would say, you know, it's something that we're doing with spiritualists is we're doing stuff suit every day and we're doing 20 minutes a day. And the reason why is because we're doing it at the end of the night martial law, like we do Quran and all these other things during the day. But when we're sitting with a seat, we're doing it 20 minutes, because we want it to be effective, we want to connect and we want to get gain some knowledge, if I sat there an hour with my children, I know there would be loss of there would be.

So by keeping it small, but doing it every day is starting to soak in. So when, you know, one time my daughter was saying something, and my son looked at her and said, Mommy, I think she rolled her eyes. Isn't that mockery? Isn't that in Sudan, homograph

attack each other, because we talked about that, you know, suffering. And so I think if you keep it to try to end the same thing with the law, again, the law isn't that long. But you have to remember that inshallah, when you know the meaning and you're connecting, it might take you 10 minutes just because of your connection with a love, but those 10 minutes are just empowering 10 minutes, that is not a waste. You know, I love that example that you gave it to you this is desert, I'm mentally picturing a little sentence saying that your little daughter is absolutely adorable.

How's

that it works, it works. And the thing is, like I said, you just do enough, it doesn't I mean, even cloud the citation to listen to the shift, and you're sitting in the car, whenever you have time, just listen for 10 minutes to the meaning of cut on every day 10 minutes, and you will notice every day you will learn something inshallah, even if it's only 10 minutes.

And I like how you're saying 10 minutes this disorder, because I think maybe we could sort of make that make that a key concept in this in trying to change and having that consistency. And we know it has to be body, mind and soul. And that's my Thursday show is body, mind and soul. So 10 minutes for the body, will you say that exercise 10 minutes for your soul? Were you you nourish your soul in your salon extra long, two hours learning lots of seed, and 10 minutes for your mind, were you gaining some knowledge. So don't put too much pressure on yourself. I really love that, let's let's call it our 10 million a 10 minute challenge. So I think that's a good idea we can we can pose this

10 minute challenge to the listeners out there who are wanting to change. So take 10 minutes for your body take 10 minutes for your mind, and 10 minutes for your soul every single day. And even if you do them, you know one after the other, that's your 20 minutes where it's your time to do those things. Because subpanel I do it with your family, you can do that as well. But doing it for yourself also where you can have a little bit time as you know, away from the hecticness of motherhood and being a wife and everything, just taking those 20 minutes 10 minutes for your mind, body and soul where you can split it up in your day whatever works best for you. I love that idea as

well. Sisters, what are what about the youth out there who are looking to make a change.

Or, you know, one of the problems I see with the youth and I love to use, they're my specialty. So one of the issues that I see is I think that they need to come closer to a lot of other they need to get to know him. And the only way to change for them is like figuring out first of all, what is their purpose to life. And once they know that purpose to life and Mashallah the changes are so much easier for the youth because they're young, they're vibrant, they have that energy, and, and they're more easy to adjust. Like, you know, the older you get, the more you set on your ways, and you don't want to change. But when they use martial arts, not like that they're easy to adjust. But the

problem is lack of knowledge, they got to understand who is a law, they have to know his attributions and his names and connect with him. And then from there make a purpose for their life, their what is the purpose of my life? What do I want to do with my life, inshallah, how do I want to do it, and once they have a vision, then inshallah they can go miles at a time. And I'll tell you this is because obviously, you know, being a motivational speaker, my kids hear me all the time, Mashallah my daughter who's 10 years old, she's an author of four books. But

we were sitting there when I went to the doctor, you know, an OB GYN and I came out and she said, Mom, you know, you know, we're talking about, what what is this? My daughter, female doctor, you know, she gets to check us. And she said, Mom, is that important? We need female doctors. I said, Yes, of course, because we don't have much of them, especially in the Muslim society. And she sat there for a few minutes and said, Mom, I want to be an OB GYN specialist. Can I do surgeries to and help the woman? What if I opened up my own woman clinic and help woman from all over? And she and she's turned in all these ideas? And I said, Are you sure that you know you have to be really good

at science and you got to get to the highest level of math and the truth, the fact she said, Mom, I will work hard with a lobby, please be happy with me. And I said, Of course because you're doing a service to society and we need stuff. And she said the norm I love five. I'll do it. And so she bought this entire idea. And so I sat back as a mother saying, okay, she's 10 Marshall. How can I help her make this happen?

You see, like, once you figured out her purpose, Eve, and she's a mom, and then she made the key to come to the mosque, can I be like, teach Islam on the weekend and like, give lectures on the weekend.

And so my thing is, once a child and the youth is just not their purpose to life, then they don't waste their time, or, you know, running around trying to figure it out, they start to go, Okay, this is what I want. My son who hates medicine and blood, he said, Mom, I love to argue, can idea lawyer systems are amazing, and the youth are amazing, they're so young and vibrant. We just need to help them to connect with a lot and then from there, they will find out their purpose to life inshallah, and how they're going to I mean, my gosh, you do it, it is just 10 years old, and she wants to do all of that. SubhanAllah you must be so proud as a mother to have a daughter like that. That is

absolutely fantastic. Well, of course, it's a product of a fantastic mother. So I wouldn't really expect anything less than inshallah, we'll be speaking to your daughter one of these days as well, I'm definitely looking forward to that. If all pass attempts to change sisters, what I have failed? How can one make sure that this year counts? And that all past mistakes are not repeated? Again?

After this is a very, very good question. The only way we will change inshallah, is by clearly wanting to change. If you really want something bad enough, you're going to find a way to get it inshallah, and I say this to all the parents out there listening, if somebody just kidnapped your child, and you love your child so much, and they cannot return, they said, you need to give me $10,000, I guarantee you, you will try to find a way to make $10,000 whether that's knocking on everybody's door, begging everyone, you will try to find a way to attain that money to get your child back. inshallah, is because we were, you know, we're desperate at that moment. And so my thing

is, if you have, you know, in the past, you failed, and you haven't changed it, because you do not want it bad enough, you have to sincerely want it bad enough, and then say, Okay, what is the way to do it? Now the best way to find it, and say, is by finding people that you can model after, so if you want to lose weight, find someone who lost 50 pounds or not, and how they did it, and do that exercise and that diet plan and model after them inshallah, because they've already achieved what you're looking to achieve. And one of the examples I use is, my children, Russia, they all want to become half as a parent and Sharla. And so I had to find a haka. And that was teaching my children

karate, because she's already memorized the Quran, Mashallah she knows how to do she knows this stuff. So if she teaches them, then she knows that weaknesses and strengths and how to go about it, versus just a regular teacher, because they never went through this procedure that they want to go through. Does that make sense? Most definitely, it makes complete sense. And I never really thought of it like that. I mean, I have read it or will probably come across it. But until you just said it now, it really hit me that if you didn't want something bad enough, you wouldn't, you would have made a plan if you wanted it, you would have gotten it by now. And I think that that really drives

the message home to a lot of people, if you really want change bad enough, you will do everything possible to do it. And I remember reading in a psychologist book once that it's easier to just be depressed and to just lie back and not do anything, because that's easy. You don't have to do anything. But when you want to change, you have to you have to get up you have to do something about it. And many people just want to sit back and let the change happen. It's not going to work like that.

Now and the thing is you have to remember that for each of us to really be motivated is to remember that on the Day of Judgment Allah will ask us about our time our youth our money, all of it Hello lucky. So we are so motivated because we have to answer to a lot and what will our answers be? Well, yeah, I'm not I'm not myself gift that because I wish we had enough money to eat all the time. No, that's not good enough. You have to know that we are accountable, and we were accountable, we have to pay attention to everything we do. So that inshallah Allah our answers inshallah will be answered that will please a lot and not make an angry with us. And then one other thing I was going to tell

you there was another thing that they could do is, if it's really difficult to heart is help, you know, have someone else to hold you accountable, either be in a group together with other sisters or other brothers, have a workout partner, could partner have someone to do with you and then it's not like you guys can make each other stronger. This also helps it gets difficult for you to start with. Like, Mashallah, you know, I try to exercise daily. My neighbor, Musharraf is also Muslim. She likes to exercise and so I told her, you know, come over and we'll do it together. She came like the first few days and then she hasn't been coming and I said to my, my daughter said, Mommy, are you still

going to exercise I said, I'm not doing it for anyone else except Allah, I have to keep my house in shape. But for her, I told her if it's hard for you Come over here, we'll do it together and it'll be easier shall know having a partner sometimes helps the people who are it's more difficult for most of us it's a fantastic tip. So if you're having difficulty in doing something good

Somebody to hold you accountable to say, okay, it's 4pm right now it's time for us to exercise. Let's go someone maybe to physically pull you and take you along with them. I think that's a fantastic idea. Since disorder in order to change and live a happy life, one must have appreciation and an attitude of gratitude towards life. When having had a bad past experiences, how can one overcome that and live a fulfilling new happy life?

Pamela, the best way to overcome your bad experiences is like thinking, What lessons have you learned from those experiences? What wasn't nothing, you know, there is a reason behind every calamity and a test and the test is that we say, so we must remember that lots of times Allah sees and hears everything he is all aware. And if he's testing us, he should sometimes Allah and ask them for help and strength. But remember that there is a lesson behind it, that test is behind that calamity. So what is the lesson that we can learn from it, and inshallah take us to become more wiser. And remembering that the past is gone? It's no longer with us. It's over. And there's nothing

we can do about it. We have to remember that, you know, you can't change the past. It's finished. So all we have is right now and the future, nobody owns it. We don't know how long you'll be alive. So we only have right now. All we need to focus on is how do we make the best of right now? let the past go. Think about the future. But don't worry too much about us. Today, work on today. Don't worry about losing 50 pounds and 60 you know, in another six months, think about losing two pounds in one week.

When you can think smaller ways. And you could but and don't think about how you gained 100 pounds overnight in month forget that. That's already happened. It's gone. Just think about what can I do right now to ensure law slowly change for myself and, and you gotta let your calamities and bad experiences go? Because honestly, it's only gonna hurt you when you have hatred, animosity, and you know that, that feeling and vibe and always anger and getting depressed, it's hurting you it's not hurting anyone else. It's only hurting you. So when do you not go and sometimes in the law in Samba I'm going to be rewarded for whatever I've gone through. inshallah, Allah will make you stronger and

think of it as a good thing, then inshallah it'll be better for you mean sister sooner and a final note, do you have any tips or words of wisdom for those out there that are listening right now and need that little extra boost in order to change their lives?

Absolutely. The most important thing is remembering a loved one fella so that he may remember you inshallah, the closer you get to him by knowing him and knowing what pleases Him you'll realize Mashallah a path to achieve your own goals after you get closer to Allah subhanaw taala you have to educate yourself and what you want to achieve as far as your knowledge what goals you want to make happen and what is after becoming a doctor or lawyer media knowledge and remember that education you know having education knowledge plus sincere intentions and blah is actually going to help you achieve your goals and shall only only with that having a large amount of it aside will all of this

happen and will you be happy if you're doing it just for uncertainty reason and Virginia reasons and for reasons of your own you know, looking then you might achieve it but you will not be able to be happy and nor will you have the Baraka in it. So I think you have to connect with a lot you have to get closer to him remember him and then inshallah go forward with his blessings inshallah.

Allah such a beautiful words indeed sisters what a desert last summer to spending time with us this afternoon or this morning in your case it is morning by you what's the time by you right now?

About 8am Mashallah. Okay. So it's morning by your design. Good morning to you for taking time out of your morning to be with us here in South Africa this afternoon. And I look forward to speaking to you again in the near future and to your children as well, just so much this disorder you take care assalamu aleikum

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that resistance arrestor worry, like I said, you can go into Facebook and you can click like on her page filled with beautiful inspiration. She's definitely such an inspirational speaker. And her words being so beautiful and so true. Be a lot conscious have that took all of the time and that is where you will find your true peace and your happiness. We're going to take a quick ad break. Now when we come back. We're going to go into this beautiful month of momentum and what ci is embarking on