TaSeel #43

Yaser Birjas

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Channel: Yaser Birjas

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The importance of observation and setting oneself apart in relationships is emphasized, along with the use of walima for various purposes, including preparing for weddings, weddings, and weddings. The translation of the holy month's meaning is a false translation of the holy month's meaning, and the importance of not being smart or clever is emphasized. The speakers stress the need for flexibility and support in avoiding conflict, finding the right person for a relationship, and avoiding negative behavior towards men and women.

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Welcome to,

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our final session in the month of Ramadan

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Insha'Allah to Aseel class. We're gonna be covering

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inshallah from the book, Imam Ibn Qudam, Rahimullah,

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Muqtasir Muhammad Qasadeen,

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the refinement of character,

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the part on the refinement of character

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on section 3 which is the etiquette of

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graceful companionship.

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We covered last week, we covered together,

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tabul i'shar, the meaning of having good companionship

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overall and,

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which is

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more focused on the subject of akhlaq and

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manners.

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Your akhlaq and your manners and how you

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treat each other, what needs to be done,

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and how do you display the akhlaq and

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masjid come to dealing with the spouse. And

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today inshaAllah ta'ala he's gonna be elaborating,

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he's gonna be adding a little bit more

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in terms of specifics

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on how to make sure that qaulallahu ta'ala

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wa ta'ala wa ashirunna bi'ma'roof treat them kindly

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that what does it mean exactly in detail.

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So, inshaAllah we're gonna start with this.

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I just wanna alert the parents that as

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we move into the discussion

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there might be a couple or three points

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where it might be a little bit sensitive

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for younger ones

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in regards to the specific of intimate connection

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between a husband and wife. Just to let

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you know, so that at least if you

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want them to be present or otherwise. Nam.

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Alhamdulillah

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writes,

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section 3, the etiquette of graceful

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companionship and the duties of both spouses.

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With respect to the husband, he has to

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observe moderation and good character in 12 things.

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Now, before we move into the 12 things

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insha'Allah, are these numbers now specific meaning that

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these are the only 12 things that he

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needs to observe?

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Obviously not. But it's just it's Istihat from

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the Ulema who wrote the book that these

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are the 12 things that, you know, generally

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you need to observe.

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Now, why did he start with the husband?

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Do you guys remember when we talked about

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the marriage in general? Why he start with

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the husband first?

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Because the husband is expected to propose. They

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are the initiating of the nikah.

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They are the ones who go and,

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and look for marriage and propose. So since

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they are the one who initiates that, it

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always befits, you know, it's more appropriate to

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begin with their etiquette and their manners inshaAllah.

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Now.

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Number 1, the wedding banquet, Walima, it is

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something recommended.

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The first thing is Al Walima. When you

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say Walima, what comes to your mind Ajamal?

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Biryani, right?

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Right away.

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Immediately.

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So, the woleema

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is basically,

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it's the meal that is usually associated with

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the nikah.

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Now,

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how this happened at the time of the

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Prophet

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the Messenger of Allah

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He actually he recommended,

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you know, when people get married that they

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serve food and celebrate with the people.

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He himself Sallallahu

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Wa Salam Alahee,

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that he that the highest the highest of

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the walima that he served was

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actually serving a goat which means it was

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actually slaughtered, it was cooked and was served

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to the people. And that was the that

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was the walima for Zaynab radiAllahu ta'ala.

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And he

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also did the walima with

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which means 2 handfuls of barley.

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What are you gonna do with barley anyway?

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You're gonna eventually probably roast it, you're gonna

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crush it, and mix it with some date,

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and some other, you know, things that's not

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even touched fire.

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Eventually, it will feed

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like a date meal you could say.

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So, something like cookie, if you could say

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it this way. So, that's something that Prophet

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Sallam also served as a woleema

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for his father. The same thing after when

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he married Sofia Radialatir Anha on the way

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back from Khaybar.

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The next day he also served some dates

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and

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some haif, which is mixture of

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some, you could say,

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butter kind of thing like a ghee and

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dates and some of the barley as well

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too. So that's the kind of like the

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way the prophet said. Now the question is,

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is there any limit for it?

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Does it have to be goat? If someone

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says I'm gonna do this sooner, inshaAllah, 1

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goat is enough. Oh, you know what? We're

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on budget, so we're gonna go with barley

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this time, inshaAllah.

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Does it have to be that way? The

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answer is no. Can you spend $100 on

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it?

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Some of you are smiling like, really $100?

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If it wasn't actually $100,000 a lot of

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moustan these days and that is a

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lot. These expenses are completely, completely ridiculous. It's

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supposed to be

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humble because the whole purpose of the Wali'ma

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is what?

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Which means to spread the news about the

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nikah and also of course, you know, celebrating

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the marriage itself. So, that's the purpose of

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it in whichever capacity is done. Now, the

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other question the Urimati asks is when the

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Walima should be done?

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Is it before

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Danica,

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it is on the wedding day, is it

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the next day in the morning after the

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consummation of the marriage? So, all these are

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options, the ulama, they have brought into the

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discussion,

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but they say the conclusion is actually customary.

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So, there is no specific timing for the

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Walima.

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So, sometimes, the people want to do the

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actual proposal,

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the actual marriage contract,

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and the wedding,

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and the walima all in one night. Can

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you guys do that? Yeah. You go to

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a banquet, for example, you have the food

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served, they do the nikah there, and they

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celebrate Bismillah, the next day they move on

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with their lives. So that's permissible.

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Or does it have to be the next

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day in the morning?

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It doesn't have to be the next day

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in the morning. In any way, in any

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time, that's actually,

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yeah, yeah, you can do that. But is

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it even mandatory to have walima? So the

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majority of the ulema, the majority of the

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ulema as Imam Abu Qudam or hamillah alluded

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to it over here he says something recommended

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except in the Maliki school. They say actually

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it's obligatory

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because it's essential to the nikah, to the

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contract itself. That is actually an opinion in

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the Maliki school. But overall the jimuho, the

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majority of the ulama they say it's actually

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just recommended. So, even if you skip it

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altogether like you serve nothing,

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it wouldn't be any problem.

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Now, can,

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can these gift bags that people distribute on

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a wedding day consider the?

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You know, those,

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what do you guys put there? A date,

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maybe a few kisses, chocolate kisses, and all

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that kind of stuff. Would that be considered

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the Walima?

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Yes.

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I don't know. I hope so.

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Inshallah.

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But the whole idea is just celebrate with

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the people with some food Inshallah. That's the

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whole

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To good treatment with the wives and enduring

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their harm, which is a result of their

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deficient intellect.

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It occurs in a hadith,

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urge yourselves

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to take care of women, for they were

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created from a rib,

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The most crooked part of a rib is

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above. If you try to straighten

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it, you will break it, and if you

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let it be, it remains crooked.

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So, urge yourselves to take care of women.

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One of the most

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misunderstood hadith and the translation make it even

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worse.

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Like, seriously, it really makes it so horrible.

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And I wanna actually pause on this one

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to explain it inshallah to Allah in much

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more details.

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First of all, the hadith that is in

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question over here is not this one as

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a matter of fact. It's the other hadith

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in

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Sayyaf Muslim and Bukhar as well.

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In which the prophet salallahu alaihi wa sallam

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after Sateel 'aid he went to address the

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women with a special talk.

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So as we're speaking to the ladies, and

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he says,

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give charity because I've seen a lot of

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women end up in Jahannam.

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How come you Rasool Allah? He said, because

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of their kufr.

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Do they deny Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala? No.

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No. No. They deny

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which means their husbands.

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If

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you were good to them your entire life,

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and she sees one thing from you, she

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would say, I've

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never seen a good day with you.

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So, that's kind of like the kind of

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argument that was brought into the discussion. Then

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the prophet says,

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I've never seen anybody

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who is.

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I don't want to lose translation now because

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I will mess it up, but I want

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to make the Arabic and then we talk

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about it. He says, I've never seen someone

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who is

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who can really,

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like, persuade

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and sway the most determined person away from

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their way like you, like you do.

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So, this hadith, they talk about, that's

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what was translated over here as deficient

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in intellect, which is a horrible translation really.

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It has nothing to do with the Arabic

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text actually.

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So, unfortunately it's a common translation by the

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way, but that shows how weak the English

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translation in regard to this matter.

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But, the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, when

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he mentioned that al Imam al Qadhi Iyal

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in his commentary

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on the hadith of sah Muslim in his

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book Al Mu'lim,

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he says, hadith

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The prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam when he

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spoke those words he was actually praising the

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women,

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not the other way

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around. How so? Because if they understand how

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it is, you realize how this is considered

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to be praised because, like, men perceive women

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in a certain way, however, these women are

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so smart,

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so clever

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that they can change anyone's mind

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easily with their own, actually, clever ways. That's

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the rough translation, the meaning of the hadith

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in itself. But now what's the point with?

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The word means what?

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The translation says deficiency,

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but actually, the wrong translation.

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When you're saying something that is

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What's the what's the opposite to it? What's

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the what's the other way the other word

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for it? The opposite to it.

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Kamal, completion.

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So, means you have something that is

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the opposite to it is what? Is to

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be complete.

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So then, if you say complete, what would

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be the opposite to the word complete in

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the translation would be then? Incomplete.

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So the word knocks doesn't speak about deficiency.

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It speaks about completion,

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incomplete, perfection,

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imperfection in that regard. That's the first thing.

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The second that the prophet said,

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The word

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Now, unfortunately, the English word that is used

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for is what?

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Intellect,

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which means to identify what?

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Cleverness, how smart they are,

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and these kind of qualities.

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But the Arabic word, Aqal, in itself over

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here has nothing to do with being smart

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or otherwise. Because what's the opposite of being

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smart or clever?

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Dumb or stupid.

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But this has nothing to do with this.

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And how do we know that? We know

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that from actually from the meaning of the

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word in itself, number 1, and number 2,

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from the example the prophet had shown us

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in the hadith.

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Because when he was explaining the nakzal aqal,

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they said because the women they asked

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how come? How is that incomplete?

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He says, as for her

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the incomplete or I would say in this

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case, like,

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of of Aqal,

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he said, the Shahada, her testimony, when she

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testifies, 2 women

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testify

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in comparison to a man, like a man's

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testimony is equivalent to 2 testimonies from women,

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specifically

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in financial matters

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and, in certain areas of the judiciary.

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Otherwise,

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women's areas,

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a testimony of 1 single woman will be

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sufficient for a 100 even men.

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Women issues, like what for example? The Prophet

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Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam, he took the testimony of

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a woman when she told a man she

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saw him walking with a woman one day,

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his wife.

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She said, by the way, I

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nursed you both when you were young.

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Can you imagine walking to your wife and

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someone comes, hey, by the way, I nursed

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you both together.

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What does that mean exactly?

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This is your sister.

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So the man was just like, oh my

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God. He goes to the prophet

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and the other day I was walking with

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my wife and then this lady she comes

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and she says I nursed you both when

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you were young.

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And the prophet said,

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that's it. It's it's done. Your marriage is

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over.

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What are you going to do with her

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testimony?

00:12:42--> 00:12:44

Like the testimony of 1 woman over here

00:12:44--> 00:12:46

was sufficient to nullify the entire marriage because

00:12:47--> 00:12:48

that's her business,

00:12:48--> 00:12:50

that's her area over here. Similarly, when it

00:12:50--> 00:12:52

comes to, for example, when does the idah

00:12:52--> 00:12:54

begin? When does the idah end? A woman's

00:12:54--> 00:12:57

testimony is sufficient when she says it's over.

00:12:57--> 00:12:59

Halas. There is no need for her to

00:12:59--> 00:13:01

have another person with her to say, yeah,

00:13:01--> 00:13:02

she's right. No need for that.

00:13:03--> 00:13:05

So, the whole idea of 2 testimonies, or

00:13:05--> 00:13:07

2 women for 1 man, is not always

00:13:07--> 00:13:08

in every area of,

00:13:10--> 00:13:12

the judiciary, basically. There are specific areas over

00:13:12--> 00:13:12

here.

00:13:13--> 00:13:15

And, that is the area that requires what?

00:13:16--> 00:13:17

When the prophet says,

00:13:18--> 00:13:20

what would be the opposite to it over

00:13:20--> 00:13:23

here? Let's talk about something interesting here. The

00:13:23--> 00:13:23

prophet

00:13:24--> 00:13:25

was not establishing

00:13:25--> 00:13:27

a fiqh rule in this statement.

00:13:27--> 00:13:30

What was he doing over here? Highlighting

00:13:31--> 00:13:32

nature,

00:13:32--> 00:13:34

highlighting something that is natural.

00:13:34--> 00:13:36

So, now, let's talk about a husband and

00:13:36--> 00:13:38

wife. When a husband and wife, they argue

00:13:38--> 00:13:39

with each other, and the man comes to

00:13:39--> 00:13:41

complain about his wife, what is the most

00:13:41--> 00:13:43

common thing he complains about his wife?

00:13:45--> 00:13:46

She's too emotional,

00:13:47--> 00:13:48

she's drama queen,

00:13:49--> 00:13:50

all that kind of stuff. What does it

00:13:50--> 00:13:51

mean by that?

00:13:54--> 00:13:56

Like, very common statement I hear from young

00:13:56--> 00:13:58

people when I say, so what's the problem?

00:13:58--> 00:14:00

Because I don't know, she doesn't see things

00:14:00--> 00:14:01

the way I see it.

00:14:02--> 00:14:03

And what does he mean by that?

00:14:04--> 00:14:06

She doesn't do logic,

00:14:06--> 00:14:07

it's not rational,

00:14:07--> 00:14:09

and that's why no matter what I say

00:14:09--> 00:14:11

to her, she doesn't take it from me.

00:14:12--> 00:14:13

Like, no matter how

00:14:13--> 00:14:14

truthful you are,

00:14:15--> 00:14:17

no matter how strong your evidence is, even

00:14:17--> 00:14:19

if you bring the Quran and the Sunnah

00:14:19--> 00:14:21

and you recite that with the voice of

00:14:21--> 00:14:22

Al Minshawi even.

00:14:23--> 00:14:25

If she was not in that moment

00:14:26--> 00:14:28

willing to take it from you, she would

00:14:28--> 00:14:29

reject it.

00:14:29--> 00:14:31

She's not rejecting the hap, she's rejecting what?

00:14:32--> 00:14:34

You in that moment. And what is that

00:14:34--> 00:14:35

exactly?

00:14:35--> 00:14:36

Feelings, emotions.

00:14:37--> 00:14:39

Right? So, when the prophet says,

00:14:40--> 00:14:41

that means actually,

00:14:42--> 00:14:44

in opposite to what? Rational.

00:14:45--> 00:14:46

And, in this situation, it has nothing to

00:14:46--> 00:14:47

do with intellect.

00:14:48--> 00:14:49

It's a matter of perception of things right

00:14:49--> 00:14:50

now.

00:14:51--> 00:14:54

But the thing that men, they actually highlight

00:14:55--> 00:14:55

as weakness,

00:14:56--> 00:14:58

what is that concern for women?

00:14:59--> 00:14:59

Perfection.

00:15:01--> 00:15:02

I mean, women are known to be more

00:15:02--> 00:15:04

emotional than men, that's natural.

00:15:05--> 00:15:07

More and that's why the prophet

00:15:07--> 00:15:08

he says,

00:15:12--> 00:15:14

He says, many men, they reach that human

00:15:14--> 00:15:15

perfection,

00:15:16--> 00:15:18

but few women did. And he mentioned,

00:15:18--> 00:15:19

Mariam,

00:15:19--> 00:15:20

Khadija,

00:15:21--> 00:15:23

and Asiya, the wife of the Frawn. Right?

00:15:23--> 00:15:24

What does that mean when he said about

00:15:24--> 00:15:26

men, sallallahu alaihi wa sallam?

00:15:26--> 00:15:28

That a lot of men also are what?

00:15:29--> 00:15:30

Because

00:15:32--> 00:15:34

a lot of men a few a lot

00:15:34--> 00:15:36

of men were complete, were perfect in that

00:15:36--> 00:15:37

sense, like, they are sensible,

00:15:38--> 00:15:39

but that means not everybody.

00:15:40--> 00:15:41

So you still find some amongst men who

00:15:41--> 00:15:43

actually also have that nakzal aql as well

00:15:43--> 00:15:44

too.

00:15:44--> 00:15:46

So a is highlighting the nature of them

00:15:46--> 00:15:47

being emotional.

00:15:48--> 00:15:49

So that's why when they give testimony, for

00:15:49--> 00:15:51

example, a man when he gives testimony, he

00:15:51--> 00:15:54

sometimes there are consequences, deal with it. But

00:15:54--> 00:15:55

women are more agreeable.

00:15:56--> 00:15:58

So, because they are agreeable, you know what,

00:15:58--> 00:16:00

sometimes she feels, you know, no, I don't

00:16:00--> 00:16:02

want them to be harmed so she kind

00:16:02--> 00:16:03

of might change the testimony

00:16:04--> 00:16:05

to kind of like alleviate

00:16:06--> 00:16:07

some of the ruling that might happen to

00:16:07--> 00:16:10

this individual, and as a result another person

00:16:10--> 00:16:12

might say, no, that's not what happened,

00:16:12--> 00:16:14

as a reminder for them. So, it's a

00:16:14--> 00:16:16

matter of perception, a matter of being emotional

00:16:16--> 00:16:16

versus

00:16:17--> 00:16:17

rational.

00:16:18--> 00:16:20

Similarly, when a woman complains about her husband

00:16:20--> 00:16:22

in an argument, what is her biggest complaint?

00:16:25--> 00:16:26

He doesn't listen. He doesn't

00:16:26--> 00:16:28

listen. Like those ears are just decoration.

00:16:30--> 00:16:32

So for her, he doesn't listen.

00:16:32--> 00:16:34

What does he mean when she said he

00:16:34--> 00:16:36

doesn't listen? Wasn't he listening to her? Because

00:16:36--> 00:16:37

the man's argument

00:16:37--> 00:16:39

would be what when she said you're not

00:16:39--> 00:16:41

listening? What would he say to her?

00:16:41--> 00:16:43

He said, are you kidding me? I've been

00:16:43--> 00:16:45

listening for the past 20 minutes.

00:16:45--> 00:16:47

Not 20 years, 20 minutes, Annie.

00:16:48--> 00:16:50

But what exactly he's trying to say, what

00:16:50--> 00:16:51

she's trying to say?

00:16:52--> 00:16:53

He is trying to

00:16:58--> 00:16:59

He's

00:17:00--> 00:17:01

not getting

00:17:01--> 00:17:04

it. He's not getting it. So, the use

00:17:04--> 00:17:06

of language is even different. When men talk,

00:17:06--> 00:17:08

they focus on the content, and women, they

00:17:08--> 00:17:09

focus on the context.

00:17:10--> 00:17:12

So, women, they focus on what was said,

00:17:13--> 00:17:15

and women usually focus on how things were

00:17:15--> 00:17:17

said, so they can figure out why this

00:17:17--> 00:17:18

possibly

00:17:18--> 00:17:20

was said in the first place. So, when

00:17:20--> 00:17:21

you

00:17:21--> 00:17:23

respond, a lot of women respond to how

00:17:23--> 00:17:25

they feel about what they hear, not what

00:17:25--> 00:17:27

they hear. A lot of women only just

00:17:27--> 00:17:28

answer to what they hear regardless

00:17:29--> 00:17:31

of why this was said actually. And that's

00:17:31--> 00:17:33

why we disconnect a lot of disconnect between

00:17:33--> 00:17:34

men and women.

00:17:34--> 00:17:36

So even in that sense,

00:17:36--> 00:17:38

that men who conceive or perceive women

00:17:39--> 00:17:41

not to be as perfect in terms of

00:17:41--> 00:17:41

rational

00:17:42--> 00:17:42

and

00:17:43--> 00:17:45

the perception of matters like this, logic,

00:17:46--> 00:17:46

the prophet said

00:17:47--> 00:17:49

they were able to persuade this man who

00:17:49--> 00:17:51

believes himself to be much of the smartest

00:17:51--> 00:17:53

person, or the strongest, resolved man, they can

00:17:53--> 00:17:55

select him and have him change his ways.

00:17:56--> 00:17:58

Now, the other idea is changing the,

00:17:59--> 00:18:01

oh, Naqsa De Din. Naqsa De Din.

00:18:01--> 00:18:02

Similarly,

00:18:02--> 00:18:04

a Nox in their Din,

00:18:04--> 00:18:07

which means here religion, because you want to

00:18:07--> 00:18:08

use the word religion.

00:18:08--> 00:18:10

Nox, what does that mean? Again, it's being

00:18:10--> 00:18:11

incomplete.

00:18:12--> 00:18:12

It's not being

00:18:13--> 00:18:14

deficiency, it's being incomplete.

00:18:15--> 00:18:17

How so? What was the example the prophet

00:18:17--> 00:18:19

gave to highlight this matter about women? What

00:18:19--> 00:18:20

was it?

00:18:21--> 00:18:23

Their period. Right? So when they have their

00:18:23--> 00:18:25

period, what do they do? They don't pray?

00:18:25--> 00:18:28

They don't fast? Is that considered deficiency?

00:18:28--> 00:18:31

No, it's not. Actually, it's for them. That's

00:18:31--> 00:18:34

perfection for them. When they stop praying and

00:18:34--> 00:18:36

fasting, that's what they're supposed to do.

00:18:36--> 00:18:39

They're supposed to abstain during this time, so

00:18:39--> 00:18:40

that from them is being religious,

00:18:42--> 00:18:44

when they abstain from praying and abstain from

00:18:44--> 00:18:45

fasting during this time.

00:18:45--> 00:18:49

However, it's considered incomplete in comparison to

00:18:49--> 00:18:50

what? The number of days

00:18:51--> 00:18:54

men would fast, the number of days men

00:18:54--> 00:18:56

will continue to pray. So it's a matter

00:18:56--> 00:18:58

of being complete versus incomplete, not a matter

00:18:58--> 00:18:59

of being deficient

00:18:59--> 00:19:02

or otherwise. So that's one of the most

00:19:02--> 00:19:03

unfortunate misunderstood.

00:19:03--> 00:19:05

As a matter of fact, the other hadith

00:19:05--> 00:19:07

that was highlighted also, which is

00:19:08--> 00:19:09

mentioned as a Bukharan Muslim.

00:19:11--> 00:19:13

As well as the prophet mentioned that in

00:19:13--> 00:19:13

the last

00:19:15--> 00:19:15

sermon.

00:19:17--> 00:19:18

He said,

00:19:20--> 00:19:22

I urge you. I urge you in regards

00:19:22--> 00:19:24

to your women, which means to take care

00:19:24--> 00:19:26

of your women. And he says,

00:19:29--> 00:19:30

they were cut from a rib.

00:19:39--> 00:19:42

Referring to what? A metaphor to what? To

00:19:42--> 00:19:42

the understanding

00:19:43--> 00:19:44

in that manner. Just like we said about

00:19:44--> 00:19:46

the difference between men and women. And these

00:19:46--> 00:19:48

are natural things, not that it's establishing any

00:19:48--> 00:19:50

specific rule, but it's highlighting the nature

00:19:50--> 00:19:52

between men and women. And there are so

00:19:52--> 00:19:54

many books out there actually that speak about

00:19:54--> 00:19:56

the difference between men and women, how they

00:19:56--> 00:19:58

eat things and how they see things. So,

00:19:58--> 00:19:59

here the prophet says exactly the same way.

00:19:59--> 00:20:02

He says, therefore, if you're gonna try to

00:20:02--> 00:20:04

fix her, which means if you're gonna straighten

00:20:04--> 00:20:06

that rip, which means what? If you want

00:20:06--> 00:20:08

her to start thinking like you, what are

00:20:08--> 00:20:09

you gonna do?

00:20:09--> 00:20:11

You're gonna break it

00:20:11--> 00:20:13

because that's not natural to her.

00:20:13--> 00:20:15

So, no matter how much you try to

00:20:15--> 00:20:17

convince your spouse, for example, for women, for

00:20:17--> 00:20:18

example, no matter how much you try to

00:20:18--> 00:20:21

convince your husband to connect with you on

00:20:21--> 00:20:22

an emotional level,

00:20:22--> 00:20:24

there's a bandwidth that he can handle

00:20:25--> 00:20:26

and then after that he's out of that

00:20:26--> 00:20:27

range.

00:20:27--> 00:20:29

Similarly, if the husband is trying to kind

00:20:29--> 00:20:31

of like put that on his wife as

00:20:31--> 00:20:33

well too, to that level like he does,

00:20:33--> 00:20:36

there's a specific bandwidth and after that it's

00:20:36--> 00:20:38

beyond their, you know, kind of like nature.

00:20:38--> 00:20:40

So, therefore, as long as it's within the

00:20:40--> 00:20:41

nature of men and women it should be

00:20:41--> 00:20:43

fine, it should be okay. That's when men

00:20:43--> 00:20:45

and women connect with each other. Outside of

00:20:45--> 00:20:47

that will be difficult.

00:20:47--> 00:20:49

Outside of that will be difficult. As a

00:20:49--> 00:20:51

matter of fact, like I said, what is

00:20:51--> 00:20:52

considered weakness,

00:20:52--> 00:20:55

what is considered weakness for a man in

00:20:55--> 00:20:56

regards to some of those traits can be

00:20:56--> 00:20:58

considered strength

00:20:58--> 00:21:00

and a good trait for the right being

00:21:00--> 00:21:01

emotional, for example,

00:21:02--> 00:21:04

and vice versa. So, this is the meaning

00:21:04--> 00:21:05

of this hadith. I just want to make

00:21:05--> 00:21:06

sure people understand

00:21:07--> 00:21:09

has nothing to do with being smart versus

00:21:09--> 00:21:11

being dumb, stupid, or being religious, or being

00:21:11--> 00:21:13

astaghfirullah wicked. It has nothing to do with

00:21:13--> 00:21:15

that. It's just a matter of, you know,

00:21:15--> 00:21:17

perception of completion and perfection.

00:21:19--> 00:21:21

Know that good manners with a woman do

00:21:21--> 00:21:23

not mean refraining from harming her but enduring

00:21:23--> 00:21:24

the harm

00:21:24--> 00:21:27

at that causing caused by her and showing

00:21:27--> 00:21:28

clemency in for her heedlessness ties and anger,

00:21:28--> 00:21:29

anger, anger, for her heedlessness

00:21:30--> 00:21:31

ties and

00:21:32--> 00:21:33

anger and imitation

00:21:34--> 00:21:35

of Allah's

00:21:35--> 00:21:38

Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. So, So what does

00:21:38--> 00:21:39

it mean before we get to the hadith

00:21:39--> 00:21:41

inshaAllah ta'ala? So he says that look, you

00:21:41--> 00:21:43

have to understand when the prophet said you

00:21:43--> 00:21:45

need to bear bear patience with your spouse,

00:21:45--> 00:21:47

with your with your wife, He says that

00:21:47--> 00:21:49

you need to make sure that it's not

00:21:49--> 00:21:51

a matter of you refrain from harming her.

00:21:51--> 00:21:53

What does that mean? Like, most men, when

00:21:53--> 00:21:54

they have an argument with their spouse, what

00:21:54--> 00:21:55

do they do?

00:21:56--> 00:21:57

In order to avoid the conflict, what do

00:21:57--> 00:21:58

they do?

00:21:58--> 00:21:59

They walk away.

00:22:00--> 00:22:01

What does that mean? Well, I don't want

00:22:01--> 00:22:02

to cause any problem.

00:22:03--> 00:22:05

Well, you start another problem right

00:22:06--> 00:22:08

now. Like, if you just always walk away

00:22:08--> 00:22:08

from conflict,

00:22:09--> 00:22:11

you're always gonna start another problem. So he

00:22:11--> 00:22:13

says it's not about, you know, just avoiding

00:22:14--> 00:22:15

and just staying away from it. No. It's

00:22:15--> 00:22:17

a matter of actually being there

00:22:17--> 00:22:18

and endure

00:22:19--> 00:22:21

the hardships of dealing with this situation.

00:22:22--> 00:22:24

Like, she's still upset with you, and she's

00:22:24--> 00:22:26

gonna start now complaining to you about her

00:22:26--> 00:22:27

day.

00:22:27--> 00:22:29

Now, most men would say, and they start

00:22:29--> 00:22:32

complaining about their day as well too. And

00:22:32--> 00:22:34

it becomes now a debate who deserves to

00:22:34--> 00:22:36

be more tired, and exhausted,

00:22:36--> 00:22:38

and escalating the situation

00:22:38--> 00:22:40

versus listen,

00:22:40--> 00:22:41

observe,

00:22:41--> 00:22:42

give them support,

00:22:43--> 00:22:44

and let them,

00:22:44--> 00:22:47

vent out to you until they feel comfortable

00:22:47--> 00:22:48

with that.

00:22:48--> 00:22:50

In the meantime, you have to endure that

00:22:50--> 00:22:52

hardship. That's what he means by this now.

00:22:54--> 00:22:56

It occurs in the 2 Sahis and the

00:22:56--> 00:22:59

authority of Omar Radianhu that the prophet saw

00:22:59--> 00:23:00

that that the prophet once

00:23:01--> 00:23:03

bandied words with him, and one of them

00:23:03--> 00:23:05

would stay away from him during a day

00:23:05--> 00:23:06

until night.

00:23:07--> 00:23:08

This is a famous hadith.

00:23:08--> 00:23:10

The hadith is known as hadith.

00:23:11--> 00:23:11

Hadith

00:23:11--> 00:23:13

when the prophet, sallallahu, sallam, he gave an

00:23:13--> 00:23:15

oath to stay away from his wife for

00:23:15--> 00:23:16

about a month.

00:23:17--> 00:23:20

And the reason why is because, the prophet

00:23:20--> 00:23:22

usually gives his wife

00:23:22--> 00:23:23

their allowance

00:23:23--> 00:23:26

annually or quarterly. So whenever there's a the

00:23:26--> 00:23:28

season comes, so he gives them the budget

00:23:29--> 00:23:30

as much as he had, sallallahu alaihi wa

00:23:30--> 00:23:33

sallam, and he distributes that among his wife

00:23:33--> 00:23:34

based on their needs.

00:23:34--> 00:23:36

So, khalas, they take their allowance for the

00:23:36--> 00:23:39

whole period and they're supposed to ration this

00:23:39--> 00:23:40

based on their, of course, skills.

00:23:41--> 00:23:44

That's the whole idea because they didn't have

00:23:44--> 00:23:46

like us, mashaAllah, paycheck to paycheck and the

00:23:46--> 00:23:48

money has tabarak ar Rahman, a pipeline of

00:23:48--> 00:23:50

income keeps coming like this. No.

00:23:50--> 00:23:52

They work from season to season, depends on

00:23:52--> 00:23:54

how much food they have and they need

00:23:54--> 00:23:55

to ration this for the season and so

00:23:55--> 00:23:56

on. Which is why

00:23:57--> 00:23:58

sometimes we have the hadith of the Prophet,

00:23:58--> 00:24:01

sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, when people go to

00:24:01--> 00:24:02

the house of the Prophet and there's no

00:24:02--> 00:24:03

food.

00:24:03--> 00:24:05

And they would ask, where would you be

00:24:05--> 00:24:06

eating all these dates?

00:24:07--> 00:24:10

Dates and water. Like, no cooked food.

00:24:11--> 00:24:13

They only use dates. They make different meals

00:24:13--> 00:24:15

with dates, by the way, like mixing dates

00:24:15--> 00:24:18

sometimes with butter, sometimes mixing with

00:24:20--> 00:24:20

flour,

00:24:21--> 00:24:21

sometimes

00:24:22--> 00:24:23

they mix it with

00:24:24--> 00:24:25

cheese or milk, actually,

00:24:26--> 00:24:27

but there's no cooked meal,

00:24:28--> 00:24:29

and they eat it. That would be their

00:24:29--> 00:24:31

food. So, even the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa

00:24:31--> 00:24:33

sallam's household did not have this much. So,

00:24:33--> 00:24:34

the wives of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa

00:24:34--> 00:24:36

sallam, every time they hear about war spoils

00:24:36--> 00:24:37

coming from an area,

00:24:38--> 00:24:40

they rush to the prophet before

00:24:40--> 00:24:43

he distributes everything to everybody else, says, can

00:24:43--> 00:24:43

we have some?

00:24:44--> 00:24:45

Can we have some? Can we have, like,

00:24:45--> 00:24:47

can I have more? Can I have more?

00:24:47--> 00:24:48

Like, the budget for this month is not

00:24:48--> 00:24:50

enough. I need more. I need more. And

00:24:50--> 00:24:52

the prophet kept telling them, no, you got

00:24:52--> 00:24:54

your money, you got your allowance. Halas, that's

00:24:54--> 00:24:55

it. You got it. You got it. This

00:24:55--> 00:24:56

is not my money, the money of the

00:24:56--> 00:24:59

people. So, they could continue to complain and

00:24:59--> 00:25:01

obviously the wife of the prophet salallahu alayhi

00:25:01--> 00:25:03

wasalam, human beings, like everybody else they would

00:25:03--> 00:25:04

like to have an improvement of their life

00:25:04--> 00:25:07

and livelihood. They also wanted to have that,

00:25:07--> 00:25:09

but the prophet had his own standard.

00:25:10--> 00:25:10

So, therefore,

00:25:11--> 00:25:12

they would be upset with him.

00:25:13--> 00:25:15

And sometimes they probably would go home and

00:25:15--> 00:25:16

they don't want to talk to him.

00:25:17--> 00:25:18

Can you imagine, Ajamal,

00:25:18--> 00:25:20

the prophet says, I'm going to the house

00:25:20--> 00:25:23

of Hafsa, the house of, maybe Sophia or

00:25:23--> 00:25:25

Zainab, and she's giving me a cold shoulder.

00:25:25--> 00:25:26

Right?

00:25:27--> 00:25:29

And, he's talking to her, she's ignoring him,

00:25:29--> 00:25:30

completely ignoring him.

00:25:30--> 00:25:32

I mean, I know the lady said, well,

00:25:32--> 00:25:34

if I were the wife of the prophet

00:25:34--> 00:25:34

sasamullah,

00:25:35--> 00:25:36

I would never do this thing. Yeah.

00:25:37--> 00:25:39

But, you have all these sahabiyat, and they

00:25:39--> 00:25:41

had to go through the same circumstances.

00:25:41--> 00:25:43

So there were some times where the prophet

00:25:43--> 00:25:45

would go home and they're not talking to

00:25:45--> 00:25:47

him. And, ibn Umar, when he heard about

00:25:47--> 00:25:48

that, he got scared, so he rushed to

00:25:48--> 00:25:50

his daughter's house, Hafsa,

00:25:50--> 00:25:51

the wife of the prophet

00:25:52--> 00:25:53

he said, yeah,

00:25:53--> 00:25:54

is that true?

00:25:55--> 00:25:56

Is that true? Sometimes you get upset with

00:25:56--> 00:25:58

the prophet and you don't talk? She said,

00:25:58--> 00:26:00

yeah, Sometimes we get upset with him the

00:26:00--> 00:26:02

whole day until the night. Like, she's proud

00:26:02--> 00:26:03

of it, Yali.

00:26:04--> 00:26:07

Right? So Amar here goes, Carla, don't do

00:26:07--> 00:26:07

this.

00:26:10--> 00:26:13

You're not like Aisha. Don't expect yourself to

00:26:13--> 00:26:15

be Mashallah's favorite like Aisha. Like he said

00:26:15--> 00:26:17

to him, like, Aisha can do it and

00:26:17--> 00:26:18

get away with it. You can't. Be careful

00:26:18--> 00:26:21

what you do. And there was that time

00:26:21--> 00:26:22

when the prophet was fed up with this,

00:26:22--> 00:26:24

said I'm done with this. So, he gave

00:26:24--> 00:26:25

an oath, he said, I swear I'm not

00:26:25--> 00:26:28

gonna be near you for an entire month.

00:26:28--> 00:26:30

And, the rumor spread that the prophet divorced

00:26:30--> 00:26:32

all his wives. Eventually, he said no. He

00:26:32--> 00:26:33

did not. He just.

00:26:34--> 00:26:36

He decided to stay away from them, for

00:26:36--> 00:26:37

a month, and by the end of the

00:26:37--> 00:26:39

month, Allah revealed the aya to the prophet,

00:26:39--> 00:26:40

sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, to go to his

00:26:40--> 00:26:41

wife, giving them the choice.

00:26:42--> 00:26:44

You wanna stay with me? You stay in

00:26:44--> 00:26:44

my standard.

00:26:45--> 00:26:48

You wanna have that luck Zahra's life? I

00:26:48--> 00:26:49

will give it to you, but you're gonna

00:26:49--> 00:26:51

have to leave me. So they all chose

00:26:51--> 00:26:53

to be what? The wives of the prophet

00:26:53--> 00:26:54

sallallahu alaihi wasallam.

00:26:55--> 00:26:57

So, here's the example here. He said, like,

00:26:57--> 00:26:59

the prophet he endured a lot of those

00:26:59--> 00:26:59

hardships.

00:27:00--> 00:27:02

He had to deal with those moments and

00:27:02--> 00:27:04

these difficulties and hardships and not listening to

00:27:04--> 00:27:05

him and so on. But at the end

00:27:05--> 00:27:07

of the day, the prophet endured all these

00:27:07--> 00:27:09

hardships. And, also, like we said, there's always

00:27:09--> 00:27:12

limitation to that bandwidth eventually now.

00:27:14--> 00:27:17

3, playing and joking with the wife. The

00:27:17--> 00:27:20

prophet Sallallahu alaihi wasallam competed with Aisha Radianha

00:27:20--> 00:27:22

and would play with his women.

00:27:23--> 00:27:25

Once he Sallallahu alaihi wasallam told Jabal Radianha

00:27:25--> 00:27:26

why did you not marry

00:27:27--> 00:27:30

a virgin bikh who could play with you

00:27:30--> 00:27:33

and with whom you could play to? No.

00:27:33--> 00:27:35

So, there are there are many beautiful examples

00:27:35--> 00:27:35

actually

00:27:36--> 00:27:37

from this matter

00:27:38--> 00:27:39

and, the prophet

00:27:40--> 00:27:40

he

00:27:41--> 00:27:41

was

00:27:42--> 00:27:43

very humble,

00:27:43--> 00:27:45

down to earth. When it comes to being

00:27:45--> 00:27:47

at home, salawatulullah wasalam was a very simple

00:27:47--> 00:27:47

man.

00:27:48--> 00:27:49

Nowadays, a lot of women, they complain their

00:27:49--> 00:27:51

husbands, masha'Allah, out there.

00:27:52--> 00:27:54

Their smile is from ear to ear.

00:27:55--> 00:27:56

But, the moment they come home, they start

00:27:56--> 00:27:57

frowning.

00:27:58--> 00:27:59

Like, there has to be like a military

00:27:59--> 00:28:00

kind

00:28:00--> 00:28:02

of like disciplined lifestyle.

00:28:02--> 00:28:04

And, the moment they come and some men,

00:28:04--> 00:28:06

unfortunately, they think that this is actually something

00:28:06--> 00:28:07

to be proud of. Like, the moment I

00:28:07--> 00:28:10

come home, everybody goes quiet.

00:28:10--> 00:28:12

Yeah. Is it out of love, out of

00:28:12--> 00:28:14

respect, or out of fear?

00:28:15--> 00:28:17

Don't tell me I don't care. The prophet

00:28:17--> 00:28:20

was better than you. Even Rasulullah he was

00:28:20--> 00:28:22

joyful at home. And from these examples that

00:28:22--> 00:28:24

he said about Muzaa, he brought the example

00:28:24--> 00:28:26

of Aisha radiAllahu anha. When the prophet was

00:28:26--> 00:28:28

traveling with Aisha radiAllahu Anha, there was a

00:28:28--> 00:28:30

moment when he said, hey, let's race.

00:28:31--> 00:28:33

So, they were racing. But just to put

00:28:33--> 00:28:34

things in the right hand context,

00:28:35--> 00:28:36

back then, when you traveled, you traveled on

00:28:36--> 00:28:37

the back of a camel.

00:28:38--> 00:28:39

So, how long does it take you to

00:28:39--> 00:28:41

travel from Mecca to Medina these days, Jema?

00:28:41--> 00:28:42

If you take the train, how long does

00:28:42--> 00:28:44

it take you? About 2 and a half

00:28:44--> 00:28:45

hours on the train, mashaAllah.

00:28:46--> 00:28:47

And what do you see outside of the

00:28:47--> 00:28:47

window?

00:28:49--> 00:28:49

The same thing.

00:28:51--> 00:28:53

Desert from the beginning to the end. Imagine

00:28:53--> 00:28:54

you go on that trip for a whole

00:28:54--> 00:28:55

week,

00:28:56--> 00:28:58

like on the back of a camel, your

00:28:58--> 00:29:00

camera is moving and moving and after maybe

00:29:00--> 00:29:02

half a day you look out of the

00:29:02--> 00:29:03

window or you just open the tent that

00:29:03--> 00:29:05

you have covered in an overview, what do

00:29:05--> 00:29:06

you see?

00:29:06--> 00:29:07

The exact same scene.

00:29:08--> 00:29:10

Right? So it's it's really boring. So the

00:29:10--> 00:29:12

prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam, he wanted to

00:29:12--> 00:29:13

kind of like

00:29:14--> 00:29:16

kill that boredom for her. So, he would

00:29:16--> 00:29:18

send the whole caravan to go ahead and

00:29:18--> 00:29:20

he'd be walking with his wife, and as

00:29:20--> 00:29:21

they walk, what do they do with Jamal?

00:29:22--> 00:29:23

What do you think they would do when

00:29:23--> 00:29:25

they'd be walking together?

00:29:25--> 00:29:26

Chit chatting.

00:29:26--> 00:29:28

Because I know some people, they just don't

00:29:28--> 00:29:29

even want to think what the Prophet will

00:29:29--> 00:29:30

be doing with Aisha.

00:29:31--> 00:29:32

They will be flirting,

00:29:32--> 00:29:34

they will be joking, they'll be chit chatting,

00:29:34--> 00:29:37

maybe holding hands, maybe, you know, whatever.

00:29:37--> 00:29:39

One of those women, the prophet told Aisha,

00:29:39--> 00:29:41

hey, you see that tree? Let's race.

00:29:42--> 00:29:44

So she was so excited,

00:29:44--> 00:29:46

and she prepared herself because no one is

00:29:46--> 00:29:48

watching them right now, just from a distance,

00:29:48--> 00:29:50

and they start running they start running towards

00:29:50--> 00:29:51

that tree.

00:29:52--> 00:29:53

By the way, I want to bring this

00:29:53--> 00:29:55

to attention here, masha'Allah.

00:29:55--> 00:29:57

These days, I don't know, it's really weird,

00:29:57--> 00:29:59

Allah must stand, that sometimes you see on

00:29:59--> 00:30:01

social media some of the sisters with full

00:30:01--> 00:30:03

hijab and full niqab and they put in

00:30:03--> 00:30:05

their videos then kind of like exercising in

00:30:05--> 00:30:06

the gym.

00:30:07--> 00:30:08

Do we need to see that?

00:30:10--> 00:30:12

You have to keep yourself keep your modesty

00:30:12--> 00:30:13

for yourself,

00:30:13--> 00:30:14

and don't display that.

00:30:15--> 00:30:17

You want exercise? Bismillah, go for it. You're

00:30:17--> 00:30:18

not doing it for me. I want to

00:30:18--> 00:30:19

inspire other women to tell them that, you

00:30:19--> 00:30:21

know what? No, you don't.

00:30:21--> 00:30:23

Just keep it for yourself.

00:30:24--> 00:30:24

But here,

00:30:25--> 00:30:27

the prophet sent the entire caravan way ahead,

00:30:28--> 00:30:31

so they're not seen when they're actually running

00:30:31--> 00:30:34

and jogging. It's okay to exercise, it's okay

00:30:34--> 00:30:36

to run for women even, but again, away

00:30:36--> 00:30:37

from the eyes of the people. So,

00:30:38--> 00:30:40

therefore, they were running and the first time

00:30:40--> 00:30:41

she won the race.

00:30:42--> 00:30:43

And, she was obviously, when she won the

00:30:43--> 00:30:45

race, I'm sure that she was laughing at

00:30:45--> 00:30:45

the prophet

00:30:46--> 00:30:47

and joking about

00:30:48--> 00:30:49

it. Until the next time, there was another

00:30:49--> 00:30:51

opportunity when they were, traveling,

00:30:52--> 00:30:54

and she gave her excuse ahead. She said,

00:30:56--> 00:30:57

I got a little bit heavier

00:30:58--> 00:30:58

and,

00:30:58--> 00:31:00

and I was a little bit older. So,

00:31:00--> 00:31:01

like, she gave an excuse.

00:31:02--> 00:31:03

She got so when we raced, he won

00:31:03--> 00:31:04

that race this time.

00:31:05--> 00:31:07

And now the prophet was turning around to

00:31:07--> 00:31:09

her while she's still catching her breath and

00:31:09--> 00:31:11

he's just laughing with her saying, 1

00:31:11--> 00:31:12

by 1.

00:31:13--> 00:31:16

Now, we don't have any records of tiebreakers

00:31:16--> 00:31:18

but we know for sure that they will

00:31:18--> 00:31:19

enjoy those moments together.

00:31:20--> 00:31:22

So, there's so much fun happening in the

00:31:22--> 00:31:23

household of the Prophet

00:31:24--> 00:31:26

even actually playing with food.

00:31:26--> 00:31:28

I know in times like ours right now

00:31:28--> 00:31:30

whether we're fasting or think of other people's

00:31:30--> 00:31:30

situation

00:31:31--> 00:31:33

we say, you can't really talk about these

00:31:33--> 00:31:35

issues. I understand, but we just need to

00:31:35--> 00:31:36

know that

00:31:36--> 00:31:39

an innocent, innocent yani fun at home is

00:31:39--> 00:31:40

okay. Like in the story

00:31:41--> 00:31:42

of and Sauda,

00:31:43--> 00:31:43

Sauda

00:31:44--> 00:31:44

and

00:31:45--> 00:31:47

and Aisha were in the same camp, like

00:31:47--> 00:31:48

the same camp of the wife of the

00:31:48--> 00:31:50

prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.

00:31:50--> 00:31:53

And Sauda was much older than Aisha. Like,

00:31:53--> 00:31:55

Aisha probably the the age of her granddaughter,

00:31:56--> 00:31:58

but she was under Aisha's command

00:31:59--> 00:32:01

because Aisha, she had that personality,

00:32:01--> 00:32:02

that charisma,

00:32:02--> 00:32:03

so they didn't.

00:32:03--> 00:32:05

So, there was that time when Aisha, she

00:32:05--> 00:32:06

cooked something,

00:32:07--> 00:32:07

and,

00:32:08--> 00:32:10

and the food Aisha said that I wasn't

00:32:10--> 00:32:12

a very good cook anyway, like, that wasn't

00:32:12--> 00:32:13

her best skill.

00:32:14--> 00:32:15

So she made a meal, and there was

00:32:15--> 00:32:17

a lot of grease on top.

00:32:17--> 00:32:18

So, soda,

00:32:19--> 00:32:20

she didn't like it, so she did not

00:32:20--> 00:32:23

eat. The prophet sitting there in the middle

00:32:23--> 00:32:26

between them, and he started eating. That's Aisha's

00:32:26--> 00:32:27

food, he can't say no.

00:32:27--> 00:32:30

And Aisha started eating. She looks at soda

00:32:30--> 00:32:32

and soda is not touching the food.

00:32:33--> 00:32:35

So she tells her, why don't you eat

00:32:35--> 00:32:35

it?

00:32:38--> 00:32:39

I don't like it.

00:32:40--> 00:32:41

Like, wow. You're telling that in her face.

00:32:41--> 00:32:42

So,

00:32:42--> 00:32:43

Aisha, she goes

00:32:48--> 00:32:49

You eat, otherwise, I'm gonna spear your face

00:32:49--> 00:32:50

with this.

00:32:51--> 00:32:53

And, Saudi just like, no, you don't dare.

00:32:53--> 00:32:53

Right?

00:32:54--> 00:32:56

She didn't even finish, and actually she grabbed

00:32:56--> 00:32:58

some and she wipes her face with it.

00:32:59--> 00:33:00

Was shocked,

00:33:00--> 00:33:02

and she looks at the prophet like,

00:33:03--> 00:33:05

look, what did she do? And the prophet

00:33:05--> 00:33:07

was looking at her smiling,

00:33:07--> 00:33:10

and gesturing her, telling her, pay back.

00:33:10--> 00:33:13

So, they grabbed someone, wiped Ayesha's face with

00:33:13--> 00:33:14

her as well too,

00:33:14--> 00:33:16

and they lived happily ever after.

00:33:18--> 00:33:20

But the idea of innocent fun

00:33:21--> 00:33:23

is okay. We're not talking about wasteful,

00:33:24--> 00:33:24

Yani,

00:33:25--> 00:33:27

behavior. We talking about this innocent fun of

00:33:27--> 00:33:29

these things, subhanallah. What's wrong with that?

00:33:30--> 00:33:32

Because you're gonna eat together anyway. Ayesha, she

00:33:32--> 00:33:35

said the prophet usually would eat, sometimes he

00:33:35--> 00:33:36

would see the piece of meat in her

00:33:36--> 00:33:38

hand when she take a bite from it,

00:33:38--> 00:33:40

and he says give me that piece. So,

00:33:40--> 00:33:42

he grabs that piece from her hand, and

00:33:42--> 00:33:43

he would put his mouth

00:33:44--> 00:33:46

where her lips were when she took that

00:33:46--> 00:33:49

bite while he's actually locking eyes with her.

00:33:50--> 00:33:51

Being flirtatious, basically.

00:33:52--> 00:33:54

That was something fun that I do regularly,

00:33:54--> 00:33:57

salawatullah wa sallam. So, the idea is that

00:33:57--> 00:33:58

it's part of what was mentioned in this

00:33:58--> 00:33:59

hadith

00:34:00--> 00:34:02

that you've been playful with each other. That's

00:34:02--> 00:34:04

the meaning of being playful

00:34:04--> 00:34:06

with one another, InshaAllah. The last point, InshaAllah,

00:34:06--> 00:34:07

we'll cover this here.

00:34:08--> 00:34:09

Point 4,

00:34:10--> 00:34:12

not exceeding the limits of jesting by becoming

00:34:12--> 00:34:13

so relaxed with his guardianship

00:34:14--> 00:34:16

that the woman loses all reverence for the

00:34:16--> 00:34:16

husband.

00:34:17--> 00:34:20

Moderation is always good. It has been narrated

00:34:20--> 00:34:22

that once when Omar ibn al Khattab Rayyan,

00:34:22--> 00:34:25

who disciplined one of his employees, his wife

00:34:25--> 00:34:26

spoke to him and asked,

00:34:27--> 00:34:28

oh, commander of the believers,

00:34:29--> 00:34:30

why are you so why are you upset

00:34:30--> 00:34:31

with him?

00:34:32--> 00:34:35

Omar Radian, who replied, oh, enemy of Allah,

00:34:35--> 00:34:36

what do you what do you have to

00:34:36--> 00:34:38

do with this? You are but a toy

00:34:38--> 00:34:41

that is played with and then left alone.

00:34:42--> 00:34:43

I want so, there are 2 things. Number

00:34:43--> 00:34:45

1, that narration is all we're gonna have

00:34:45--> 00:34:46

to explain.

00:34:47--> 00:34:49

But before that, the prophet salallahu alayhi was

00:34:49--> 00:34:52

asking the explanation saying that, look, the man

00:34:52--> 00:34:54

when he comes in having fun and dressing

00:34:54--> 00:34:54

with your spouse,

00:34:55--> 00:34:57

making sure that you don't lose respect for

00:34:57--> 00:34:58

one another.

00:34:59--> 00:35:01

Like, don't let your

00:35:02--> 00:35:02

fun moments

00:35:03--> 00:35:05

be too much that would lose respect for

00:35:05--> 00:35:06

one another.

00:35:06--> 00:35:08

As a matter of fact, the lady, obviously,

00:35:08--> 00:35:10

she doesn't respect the man if the man

00:35:10--> 00:35:11

doesn't respect himself.

00:35:12--> 00:35:13

So, you need to have that kind of

00:35:13--> 00:35:15

charisma as well too that she is looking

00:35:15--> 00:35:17

up to you as being the leader of

00:35:17--> 00:35:17

the

00:35:18--> 00:35:19

house. But at the same time, you are

00:35:19--> 00:35:21

fun to be around, very respectful,

00:35:21--> 00:35:25

very loving, very caring, very understanding, and so

00:35:25--> 00:35:27

on. And the same thing, the lady,

00:35:27--> 00:35:28

she

00:35:28--> 00:35:29

also expects

00:35:30--> 00:35:31

the man to treat her in the same

00:35:31--> 00:35:33

fashion, with love and respect as well too.

00:35:33--> 00:35:35

Otherwise, if we lose respect for each other,

00:35:35--> 00:35:37

like too much reliance, allowing

00:35:38--> 00:35:41

vulgar language, for example, or stuff for Allah,

00:35:41--> 00:35:43

bad behavior with each other, losing respect for

00:35:43--> 00:35:46

another. That's not right. Now, regarding the statement

00:35:46--> 00:35:47

about Abu Khattab

00:35:49--> 00:35:50

I looked it up everywhere.

00:35:51--> 00:35:53

As a matter of fact, Al Hafiz al

00:35:53--> 00:35:53

Iraqi

00:35:55--> 00:35:58

who commented and scrutinized all the hadith and

00:35:58--> 00:35:58

the asar

00:35:59--> 00:35:59

in which

00:36:00--> 00:36:01

is the origin of the book itself

00:36:02--> 00:36:03

he didn't comment on it.

00:36:04--> 00:36:05

Ibn al Jawzi who also had

00:36:06--> 00:36:07

a on

00:36:07--> 00:36:09

was also known for being a scar of

00:36:09--> 00:36:10

hadith, scrutinizing

00:36:11--> 00:36:12

the hadith like.

00:36:13--> 00:36:16

He also did not even comment on it.

00:36:16--> 00:36:18

So there was really no hassle to the

00:36:18--> 00:36:19

story. Like, we don't know where the story

00:36:19--> 00:36:20

came from.

00:36:20--> 00:36:23

It sometimes could be actually tales or some

00:36:23--> 00:36:25

sometimes it's kind of like usas they mention

00:36:25--> 00:36:28

these stories. So, there is really no way

00:36:28--> 00:36:30

to trace that story back to Abu Khattab

00:36:30--> 00:36:34

radiAllahu ta'ala. Although, some they gave some extra

00:36:34--> 00:36:34

details

00:36:35--> 00:36:37

thinking or saying that it was about,

00:36:37--> 00:36:38

Ayad of Nganam

00:36:39--> 00:36:41

who was related to the wife of Umar

00:36:41--> 00:36:43

Abu Khattab radiAllahu an and Umar he was

00:36:43--> 00:36:45

holding a grudge against Riyadh or maybe he

00:36:45--> 00:36:47

was not putting him in the favorite circle,

00:36:48--> 00:36:49

so she kind of

00:36:49--> 00:36:51

intervened for him. Like, so what's wrong? Why

00:36:51--> 00:36:54

do you have issues with Riyadh? So, Ram

00:36:54--> 00:36:55

was offended by this. That's none of your

00:36:55--> 00:36:57

business. Stay out of this.

00:36:58--> 00:36:59

This is not your business.

00:37:00--> 00:37:02

And he mentioned this statement over here that

00:37:02--> 00:37:03

you are just a toy you played with

00:37:03--> 00:37:05

and you were left alone.

00:37:05--> 00:37:05

Again,

00:37:06--> 00:37:07

that is not the etiquette of the prophet,

00:37:07--> 00:37:08

sallallahu alaihi wa sallam. As a matter of

00:37:08--> 00:37:09

fact, what we learned from the prophet, sallallahu

00:37:09--> 00:37:11

alaihi wa sallam, is the opposite.

00:37:11--> 00:37:13

He would take into consideration if he gets

00:37:13--> 00:37:14

an advice from his wife, sallallahu alaihi wa

00:37:14--> 00:37:16

sallam. And as a matter of fact,

00:37:16--> 00:37:18

one of those critical moments in the history

00:37:18--> 00:37:19

of the Muslim, Umma,

00:37:20--> 00:37:22

was saved by the advice of one of

00:37:22--> 00:37:24

his wife, the prophet, sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.

00:37:24--> 00:37:25

Who's that wife was, Jema? Anyone knows?

00:37:26--> 00:37:27

Salam

00:37:27--> 00:37:28

And what incident was that?

00:37:29--> 00:37:31

The Hudaybia. The Treaty of Hudaybia.

00:37:32--> 00:37:34

When the prophet signed the treaty with the

00:37:34--> 00:37:35

people of Mecca

00:37:35--> 00:37:37

about the 10 years of truce

00:37:38--> 00:37:40

and then anyone who becomes Muslim, they send

00:37:40--> 00:37:41

him back

00:37:42--> 00:37:42

again

00:37:43--> 00:37:44

to the Meccans,

00:37:44--> 00:37:47

and all the provisions of that treaty. So

00:37:47--> 00:37:48

Habaa were upset with it because they were

00:37:48--> 00:37:50

supposed to be making umrah, and now they

00:37:50--> 00:37:51

were told, you're not gonna do umrah.

00:37:52--> 00:37:53

So the prophet told them, take off your

00:37:53--> 00:37:55

haram, shave your heads, and we're gonna

00:37:56--> 00:37:57

head home, and slaughter your

00:37:58--> 00:37:59

animals. And no one was listening.

00:37:59--> 00:38:01

No one listened. Can you imagine?

00:38:01--> 00:38:04

About 1600 people sitting there, and everybody just

00:38:04--> 00:38:06

kind of giving the prophet the cold shoulder.

00:38:07--> 00:38:08

No one is obeying his command

00:38:09--> 00:38:11

So he goes so distressed to the tent

00:38:11--> 00:38:11

of

00:38:13--> 00:38:14

and he starts

00:38:14--> 00:38:16

venting to her, to his wife.

00:38:16--> 00:38:18

He goes, don't you see what the people

00:38:18--> 00:38:19

are doing? Like, I've been telling them to

00:38:19--> 00:38:21

do so and so, and now listen to

00:38:21--> 00:38:21

me.

00:38:23--> 00:38:24

It's okay, Rasulullah. They're upset.

00:38:25--> 00:38:28

Like, rightfully upset. It's alright. Understand them. She

00:38:28--> 00:38:30

said, however, I know that they will follow

00:38:30--> 00:38:33

your command. Just go out, call your barber,

00:38:33--> 00:38:35

shave your head, change your hiram, slaughter your

00:38:35--> 00:38:37

animals, and I guarantee you they will follow

00:38:37--> 00:38:38

your command, your lead.

00:38:39--> 00:38:41

And the prophet, he liked the idea. He

00:38:41--> 00:38:43

liked her suggestion. He went out, did exactly

00:38:43--> 00:38:45

what she said, and that's what Sahaba was

00:38:45--> 00:38:47

doing as well too.

00:38:47--> 00:38:48

As a matter of fact, when they were

00:38:48--> 00:38:50

shaving each other's head they were so upset

00:38:50--> 00:38:51

they almost skinned each other.

00:38:53--> 00:38:54

But at least they followed the order and

00:38:54--> 00:38:56

the leader of the prophet salawatulahu alaihi wa

00:38:56--> 00:39:00

sallam alaihi. So this statement actually runs contrary

00:39:00--> 00:39:02

to what we know from the prophet salawatulahu

00:39:02--> 00:39:05

alaihi wa sallam However, if anyone wants to

00:39:05--> 00:39:07

give a justification to that statement anyway, he

00:39:07--> 00:39:10

says, look, because Allah subhanahu wa'ala said that

00:39:10--> 00:39:11

this dunya is what?

00:39:13--> 00:39:14

It's an enjoyment.

00:39:14--> 00:39:16

And like the prophet said in Harid Jaber,

00:39:17--> 00:39:19

that you are playful with each other.

00:39:20--> 00:39:22

So, we understand that probably from this context

00:39:22--> 00:39:25

that you guys are a source of enjoyment

00:39:25--> 00:39:28

for one another. So, basically, we enjoy each

00:39:28--> 00:39:28

other together,

00:39:29--> 00:39:31

Leave the serious business to me.

00:39:32--> 00:39:34

Don't get involved in that. For you and

00:39:34--> 00:39:36

I, let's our relationship stay as it is,

00:39:36--> 00:39:38

that we are the enjoyment for another,

00:39:38--> 00:39:41

but that's serious business of the state, leave

00:39:41--> 00:39:43

it for me. But once again, the prophet

00:39:43--> 00:39:45

salallahu alayhi wa sallam sunnah is better to

00:39:45--> 00:39:45

be followed.

00:39:47--> 00:39:49

So, inshallah we stop here, inshallah ta'ala, and

00:39:49--> 00:39:51

next time we come we start from point

00:39:51--> 00:39:52

number 5.

00:40:26--> 00:40:27

Ready?

00:40:33--> 00:40:35

So we're still studying hadith number 23

00:40:35--> 00:40:37

for those who are joining us for the

00:40:37--> 00:40:40

first time over here. Hadith number 23 from

00:40:40--> 00:40:41

Al Arbon Nawia.

00:40:42--> 00:40:45

Hadid Abu Marik Al Asha Radiallahu Ta'anhu Wa'Dha.

00:40:50--> 00:40:52

That purity or purification is half of our

00:40:52--> 00:40:52

faith.

00:40:55--> 00:40:56

Saying

00:40:57--> 00:40:59

fills, the the mizan, the scales.

00:41:01--> 00:41:02

So praising Allah

00:41:03--> 00:41:05

and freeing him from any deficiencies

00:41:15--> 00:41:16

Charity is proof.

00:41:19--> 00:41:20

Patience is illumination.

00:41:23--> 00:41:25

The Quran is a proof for you or

00:41:25--> 00:41:26

against you.

00:41:27--> 00:41:29

Everybody goes out in the morning, starting their

00:41:29--> 00:41:30

day, and they work so hard for life

00:41:30--> 00:41:31

for themselves.

00:41:32--> 00:41:35

And everybody is trading themselves, they're exchanging themselves

00:41:35--> 00:41:36

for something else.

00:41:37--> 00:41:37

What is that?

00:41:39--> 00:41:42

Some, with that exchange, they free themselves on

00:41:42--> 00:41:43

the day of judgment

00:41:43--> 00:41:44

and others, unfortunately,

00:41:44--> 00:41:46

they ruin themselves. May Allah make us a

00:41:46--> 00:41:47

mother to free themselves

00:41:48--> 00:41:50

So we talked about the meaning of tuhl,

00:41:50--> 00:41:51

what does it mean to be half a

00:41:51--> 00:41:53

faith. We spoke about

00:42:12--> 00:42:15

Now, which one more valuable? Of all those

00:42:15--> 00:42:17

4 points, there are 2 points or 2

00:42:17--> 00:42:19

of them are the most valuable. If you

00:42:19--> 00:42:20

guys remember, what are they?

00:42:24--> 00:42:24

Saying alhamdulillah

00:42:25--> 00:42:26

and saying la ilaha illallah.

00:42:27--> 00:42:30

Why tahmid is more valuable than tasbih?

00:42:32--> 00:42:33

No. No.

00:42:33--> 00:42:36

Why tahmid is more valuable than tasbih? Like

00:42:36--> 00:42:37

saying alhamdulillah

00:42:38--> 00:42:40

is more valuable than or virtuous than tasbih.

00:42:40--> 00:42:41

SubhanAllah.

00:42:43--> 00:42:44

No. It's not about being inclusive.

00:42:48--> 00:42:51

Because tasbih is freeing Allah subhanahu wa ta

00:42:51--> 00:42:51

from imperfections,

00:42:52--> 00:42:55

and tahmid is what? Confirming and affirming

00:42:56--> 00:42:56

his perfection.

00:42:57--> 00:42:59

Like we said, if you're gonna be praising

00:42:59--> 00:43:01

somebody, would you praise them with negative traits

00:43:01--> 00:43:03

or positive ones?

00:43:03--> 00:43:05

So, if you're gonna praise someone by telling

00:43:05--> 00:43:06

him, masha'Allah,

00:43:06--> 00:43:07

you're not stupid,

00:43:08--> 00:43:11

you're not ugly, you're not stingy.

00:43:11--> 00:43:14

Am I am I right now, Yani, a

00:43:14--> 00:43:15

criticizing a person or am I praising a

00:43:15--> 00:43:16

person?

00:43:16--> 00:43:18

It's supposed to be praise, but who's gonna

00:43:18--> 00:43:19

be accepting from you these

00:43:20--> 00:43:21

things to praise them, Yani?

00:43:22--> 00:43:24

And that's why if you're gonna be praising

00:43:24--> 00:43:26

anyone with these kind of traits, you have

00:43:26--> 00:43:26

to bring

00:43:27--> 00:43:29

affirmation of perfection with it. So that's why

00:43:29--> 00:43:30

tahmid

00:43:30--> 00:43:31

is higher than tasbih.

00:43:31--> 00:43:33

And tahleel and tahmid

00:43:33--> 00:43:34

because tahmid

00:43:34--> 00:43:36

includes also what?

00:43:36--> 00:43:37

The

00:43:37--> 00:43:39

most perfect thing about Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala

00:43:39--> 00:43:41

is what? His oneness. So it's included with

00:43:41--> 00:43:42

it as well. So today, inshallah, we're gonna

00:43:42--> 00:43:43

finish the hadith

00:43:44--> 00:43:45

by reading on

00:43:48--> 00:43:49

and the rest of the other two points

00:44:00--> 00:44:01

about his saying

00:44:03--> 00:44:05

the prayer is a light, sadaqah is a

00:44:05--> 00:44:07

proof and steadfastness

00:44:07--> 00:44:09

a radiant light, and in some of the

00:44:09--> 00:44:10

additions of Sahih al Muslim

00:44:11--> 00:44:13

and fasting is a radiant light, then these

00:44:13--> 00:44:16

are 3 types of actions all of which

00:44:16--> 00:44:18

are lights but some of which are singled

00:44:18--> 00:44:20

out for different types of light. Before we

00:44:20--> 00:44:21

get to this, to continue with that, what's

00:44:21--> 00:44:23

the meaning of saying the 3 are considered

00:44:23--> 00:44:24

lights?

00:44:24--> 00:44:25

He said,

00:44:31--> 00:44:33

He used the word nur for it.

00:44:33--> 00:44:35

Now, he said for Siam, which is gonna

00:44:35--> 00:44:36

come later or

00:44:37--> 00:44:38

Sabr, patience,

00:44:38--> 00:44:40

he said it's actually considered.

00:44:41--> 00:44:42

What's the difference between and?

00:44:45--> 00:44:45

Is

00:44:46--> 00:44:47

actually a reflection.

00:44:48--> 00:44:48

Adiyah,

00:44:49--> 00:44:50

it's from within.

00:44:51--> 00:44:53

So, the fire the the the sun what

00:44:53--> 00:44:55

do we call the light of the sun?

00:44:57--> 00:44:59

And what do we call the light that

00:44:59--> 00:45:00

comes from the moon?

00:45:01--> 00:45:03

Noor. That's why Allah mentioned that in the

00:45:03--> 00:45:04

Quran. That he made

00:45:07--> 00:45:09

the Hashem He made sun the sun to

00:45:09--> 00:45:11

be dua because the fire is from within,

00:45:13--> 00:45:14

but it's a reflection.

00:45:14--> 00:45:16

Why? Because Assalah

00:45:16--> 00:45:18

supposed to be a reflection of what?

00:45:20--> 00:45:23

Your goodness. What's in there? Right?

00:45:25--> 00:45:27

There is light in salah. It's a reflection

00:45:27--> 00:45:28

of your iman.

00:45:28--> 00:45:30

If you have that iman, it's gonna come

00:45:30--> 00:45:31

out in the form of what?

00:45:32--> 00:45:34

Salah. Why salah right now is much more

00:45:34--> 00:45:36

important than zakah and siyam?

00:45:39--> 00:45:40

They're all obligatory.

00:45:40--> 00:45:42

But because salah is the first thing you're

00:45:42--> 00:45:44

gonna be asked on the Day of Judgment,

00:45:44--> 00:45:46

and it's one of the most difficult tasks

00:45:46--> 00:45:47

that you do because you have to do

00:45:47--> 00:45:49

it how how often do you do that?

00:45:49--> 00:45:51

5 times a day Ajamal.

00:45:52--> 00:45:53

5 times a day. Unless you're doing it

00:45:53--> 00:45:54

5 times a day, you have to do

00:45:54--> 00:45:55

it with what?

00:45:56--> 00:45:57

Specific appointed time.

00:45:58--> 00:46:00

So, if you maintain the 5 daily prayers,

00:46:00--> 00:46:03

indeed, it's a reflection of iman. It's

00:46:05--> 00:46:07

nur. Charity is a proof.

00:46:08--> 00:46:10

When we say proof or burhan, it's also

00:46:10--> 00:46:13

another form of light. Right? You know, when

00:46:13--> 00:46:15

you find when sometimes you're investigating something

00:46:16--> 00:46:18

and you think of something so deeply like

00:46:18--> 00:46:20

that, and then suddenly it hits you.

00:46:21--> 00:46:22

You know,

00:46:24--> 00:46:26

even in common culture, in cartoons, for example,

00:46:26--> 00:46:27

when you get that idea,

00:46:28--> 00:46:30

what kind of image that comes actually popping

00:46:30--> 00:46:31

in your head?

00:46:31--> 00:46:32

Light

00:46:32--> 00:46:33

bulb.

00:46:33--> 00:46:35

Right? So a sadaqa is a proof. It's

00:46:35--> 00:46:36

just like a lighthouse

00:46:37--> 00:46:39

that leads you it's a prove that it

00:46:39--> 00:46:41

leads you away from danger.

00:46:42--> 00:46:43

That's what it means. We can explain that

00:46:43--> 00:46:44

a little bit more details.

00:46:46--> 00:46:48

Patience, steadfastness,

00:46:48--> 00:46:51

is also considered radiant light or or burning

00:46:51--> 00:46:51

light.

00:46:53--> 00:46:56

And also was, another narration, instead of saying

00:46:56--> 00:46:58

he said, a song.

00:46:58--> 00:47:00

And a song is part of also requires

00:47:00--> 00:47:01

what?

00:47:01--> 00:47:03

Patience, Ajamal. Sobble from you. Steadfastness.

00:47:04--> 00:47:06

To stay away from the haram and not

00:47:06--> 00:47:08

eating, not drinking. So, it is in that

00:47:08--> 00:47:09

sense also considered

00:47:09--> 00:47:12

du'yah, but it has a burning sensation. Why

00:47:12--> 00:47:13

is that a jama'ah?

00:47:15--> 00:47:17

It's difficult. You get thirsty, the heat of

00:47:17--> 00:47:19

the sun, the belly, you know, feels the

00:47:19--> 00:47:20

fire on your belly when it's empty.

00:47:21--> 00:47:22

So, from that sense you have it as

00:47:22--> 00:47:24

a dia. So, just I wanna explain these

00:47:24--> 00:47:25

3 quickly before we go to the details

00:47:25--> 00:47:26

inshallah now.

00:47:28--> 00:47:31

The payer is unqualified light and it has

00:47:31--> 00:47:33

been narrated with 2 chains of net transmission

00:47:34--> 00:47:35

about both of which there is some discussion

00:47:35--> 00:47:38

from Anas, about both of which there is

00:47:38--> 00:47:39

some discussion.

00:47:39--> 00:47:40

From Anas did the prophet

00:47:41--> 00:47:43

said, the prayer is the light of the

00:47:43--> 00:47:44

mumin.

00:47:44--> 00:47:45

In the world, it is a light for

00:47:45--> 00:47:48

the muminoon in their hearts and inner sides

00:47:48--> 00:47:49

by which their hearts become bright and the

00:47:49--> 00:47:51

light of the inner side appears. And so

00:47:51--> 00:47:53

for this reason reason,

00:47:54--> 00:47:56

it that is the prayer is the refreshment

00:47:56--> 00:47:57

of the eyes of the people of Tahuwa

00:47:57--> 00:48:00

as the prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said, the

00:48:00--> 00:48:03

refreshment of my eyes has been placed in

00:48:03--> 00:48:05

prayer. So, he is gonna highlight, actually, he

00:48:05--> 00:48:07

is gonna highlight here that, a salah to

00:48:07--> 00:48:10

noor in terms of dunya and in the

00:48:10--> 00:48:12

akhirah. So, the first one he says, in

00:48:12--> 00:48:12

this world

00:48:13--> 00:48:15

in this world, it is nur for their

00:48:15--> 00:48:15

hearts,

00:48:16--> 00:48:18

nur for their sight. As the prophet

00:48:20--> 00:48:22

said, that my coolness of my eyes was

00:48:22--> 00:48:25

made in salah. So that's the first thing.

00:48:25--> 00:48:26

And then,

00:48:26--> 00:48:27

the second thing if you go down when

00:48:27--> 00:48:29

it says, it will be a light for

00:48:29--> 00:48:30

the Mu'minin in their graves.

00:48:32--> 00:48:34

It will be light it will be a

00:48:34--> 00:48:36

light for the Mu'minin in their graves, particularly

00:48:36--> 00:48:39

the prayer at night as Abu Darda said,

00:48:39--> 00:48:42

pray 2 rakats in the darkness of the

00:48:42--> 00:48:44

night for the darkness of the graves. So,

00:48:44--> 00:48:46

that you eliminate basically your graves now?

00:48:48--> 00:48:50

At night for a period and someone came

00:48:50--> 00:48:52

in her sleep and recited to her, your

00:48:52--> 00:48:54

prayer is a light while the slaves are

00:48:54--> 00:48:56

asleep and your sleep is the obstinate opposite

00:48:56--> 00:48:59

of prayer. So anyone knows who Arabia was?

00:49:01--> 00:49:03

Arabia Al Aduiyah, she was well known of

00:49:03--> 00:49:05

the, the righteous women of that time.

00:49:06--> 00:49:07

She is known to be a very ascetic

00:49:07--> 00:49:09

lady, she had a very righteous life, and

00:49:09--> 00:49:10

she was known for this kind of, you

00:49:10--> 00:49:12

know, beautiful poetry.

00:49:13--> 00:49:15

So, she said those beautiful words. That one

00:49:15--> 00:49:16

time

00:49:16--> 00:49:19

she got really exhausted and fatigued because of

00:49:19--> 00:49:19

her Ibadah,

00:49:20--> 00:49:20

So,

00:49:21--> 00:49:23

she overslept and she skipped the time of

00:49:23--> 00:49:24

her tahajjud.

00:49:24--> 00:49:26

So, she had in her dream someone come

00:49:26--> 00:49:27

at her and say, like you're sleeping.

00:49:28--> 00:49:29

When the salaahu alayhi was the light for

00:49:29--> 00:49:31

your heart. Make sure that you do that

00:49:31--> 00:49:33

because this should wake you up and keep

00:49:33--> 00:49:34

you illuminated now.

00:49:35--> 00:49:36

In the next life, it is a light

00:49:36--> 00:49:38

for the mumminoon on the day. So, that's

00:49:38--> 00:49:39

the 3rd now form of light. So, first

00:49:39--> 00:49:41

one in the dunya, second in the grave,

00:49:41--> 00:49:42

3rd in the akhirah.

00:49:43--> 00:49:44

In the next life is a life for

00:49:44--> 00:49:46

the muminun on the day of rising and

00:49:46--> 00:49:48

on the surat, the bridge over the fire

00:49:48--> 00:49:50

to the to to the garden.

00:49:50--> 00:49:52

Because the lights are appointed to them according

00:49:52--> 00:49:53

to their actions.

00:49:53--> 00:49:55

There is in the Muslim and in the

00:49:55--> 00:49:55

from

00:49:56--> 00:49:58

Abdulrah Muhammad prophet

00:49:59--> 00:50:00

mentioned

00:50:00--> 00:50:01

that the prayer said,

00:50:02--> 00:50:06

mention mention the prayer and said, whoever safeguards

00:50:06--> 00:50:08

it, and it it will be a light,

00:50:08--> 00:50:10

a proof and a salvation for him on

00:50:10--> 00:50:10

the day of rising.

00:50:11--> 00:50:13

Whoever does not safeguard it, it will not

00:50:13--> 00:50:14

be a light nor salvation

00:50:15--> 00:50:17

nor a proof for him. So, this is

00:50:17--> 00:50:19

what the meaning right now that making salah

00:50:19--> 00:50:21

again, it's a light for you in this

00:50:21--> 00:50:22

dunya,

00:50:22--> 00:50:24

a light in the grave, and a light

00:50:24--> 00:50:26

on the day of judgment. May Allah give

00:50:26--> 00:50:27

us that light.

00:50:27--> 00:50:29

Amen. As for sadaqa?

00:50:29--> 00:50:32

As for sadaqa, it is, it is a

00:50:32--> 00:50:33

proof, Burhan.

00:50:33--> 00:50:35

Burhan is the rays of light which are

00:50:35--> 00:50:37

close to the face of the sun. Like

00:50:37--> 00:50:39

saying that the aura or the flare of

00:50:39--> 00:50:41

the sun, you know, the sun flares, the

00:50:41--> 00:50:41

solar flares.

00:50:42--> 00:50:44

So just like the the fire comes within

00:50:44--> 00:50:45

now.

00:50:45--> 00:50:47

As for the example in the hadith of

00:50:47--> 00:50:50

Abu Musa, that the ruh of the will

00:50:50--> 00:50:52

come out of his body at dead having

00:50:52--> 00:50:55

rays of light like the sun's rays of

00:50:55--> 00:50:55

light.

00:50:56--> 00:50:58

From that a category proof is called

00:50:59--> 00:51:01

because of the clarity of it showing

00:51:01--> 00:51:02

that which it shows.

00:51:03--> 00:51:04

Similarly, is

00:51:05--> 00:51:07

a burhan, a proof of the authenticity of

00:51:07--> 00:51:09

a person's iman.

00:51:09--> 00:51:11

The person's contentment with it is a sign

00:51:11--> 00:51:12

of his experiencing

00:51:12--> 00:51:14

the sweetness and the savor,

00:51:15--> 00:51:17

and the savor of iman As is narrated

00:51:17--> 00:51:18

in

00:51:19--> 00:51:19

hadith

00:51:21--> 00:51:22

of That the prophet

00:51:23--> 00:51:26

said, There are 3 things with which whoever

00:51:26--> 00:51:27

does them has tasted

00:51:28--> 00:51:29

the savor of iman.

00:51:31--> 00:51:32

Whoever worships Allah alone,

00:51:33--> 00:51:35

and then there is no god but Allah,

00:51:35--> 00:51:37

pays the zakah of his wealth,

00:51:37--> 00:51:39

wills his selfless pleased

00:51:39--> 00:51:41

with it, and supports him to do it

00:51:41--> 00:51:43

every year. And he mentioned the rest of

00:51:43--> 00:51:46

the hadith. Abu Dawood narrated it. So the

00:51:46--> 00:51:47

the points from the hadith here is when

00:51:47--> 00:51:48

he says

00:51:53--> 00:51:55

basically like you give it out of, you

00:51:55--> 00:51:57

know, faith, it coming from the heart

00:51:58--> 00:51:59

with complete satisfaction.

00:52:08--> 00:52:09

To Barakah Wa Ta'ala.

00:52:10--> 00:52:12

When he says God, we mentioned in the

00:52:12--> 00:52:15

commentary of the hadith, if you look

00:52:15--> 00:52:17

at the bottom of that page.

00:52:18--> 00:52:21

We mentioned in the commentary of the hadith,

00:52:21--> 00:52:23

I have been commanded to fight people until

00:52:23--> 00:52:24

they witness that there is no god but

00:52:24--> 00:52:26

Allah and that Muhammad is the messenger of

00:52:26--> 00:52:29

Allah, and they established the prayer and paid

00:52:29--> 00:52:31

as a guy. That the prayer is the

00:52:31--> 00:52:34

distinguishing factor between kufr and Islam. It is

00:52:34--> 00:52:35

also the first thing for which a man

00:52:35--> 00:52:37

will be taken to account on the day

00:52:37--> 00:52:38

of rising.

00:52:38--> 00:52:40

If someone's prayer is complete, then he has

00:52:40--> 00:52:41

succeeded

00:52:41--> 00:52:43

and is saved. We have previously seen the

00:52:43--> 00:52:46

hadith of Abdullah ibn Amr concerning whoever safeguards

00:52:46--> 00:52:48

it, that it will be a light, a

00:52:48--> 00:52:50

proof, and a salvation for him

00:52:50--> 00:52:52

on the day of rising. So the point

00:52:52--> 00:52:53

is we're making is that when it comes

00:52:53--> 00:52:54

to giving charity,

00:52:54--> 00:52:56

the proof to how is it considered a

00:52:56--> 00:52:58

proof? A proof of iman. How is that?

00:52:58--> 00:53:00

A proof of iman, just like salah, someone

00:53:00--> 00:53:03

to maintain the 5 daily prayers regularly, it

00:53:03--> 00:53:04

really requires strong iman.

00:53:05--> 00:53:07

Charity as well too, because you earned it,

00:53:07--> 00:53:09

you know, fair and square. You spend your

00:53:09--> 00:53:09

effort,

00:53:10--> 00:53:12

your money, your investment, your energy,

00:53:12--> 00:53:14

and you earn all that money.

00:53:14--> 00:53:16

How easy is it going to be for

00:53:16--> 00:53:18

people to give this money away

00:53:18--> 00:53:20

when they know they might not get anything

00:53:20--> 00:53:22

in return on this dinner for it? It's

00:53:22--> 00:53:23

It's not going to be

00:53:23--> 00:53:25

easy. So, when people march like we've seen

00:53:25--> 00:53:26

in the fundament of Barakah Rahman, people give

00:53:26--> 00:53:29

in a 100,000, 50,000, 25,000,

00:53:29--> 00:53:30

10,000, 5,000.

00:53:31--> 00:53:33

What are they getting out of this? They're

00:53:33--> 00:53:35

not getting even a piece of paper.

00:53:36--> 00:53:38

They're getting the reward from Allah but they're

00:53:38--> 00:53:40

still giving it because they believe in that

00:53:40--> 00:53:42

cause. And that's a proof of faith and

00:53:42--> 00:53:45

iman. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

00:53:45--> 00:53:46

Number 6, steadfastness.

00:53:47--> 00:53:48

As for steadfastness,

00:53:49--> 00:53:51

it is a radiant light, dia and dia

00:53:52--> 00:53:54

which is the light which has some degree

00:53:54--> 00:53:55

of heat and burning in it like the

00:53:55--> 00:53:57

radiant light of the sun as opposed to

00:53:57--> 00:54:00

the moon because it, the moon is pure

00:54:00--> 00:54:02

light in which there is illumination without any

00:54:02--> 00:54:02

burning.

00:54:08--> 00:54:10

It is it is He who appointed the

00:54:10--> 00:54:11

sun to give radiance and the moon to

00:54:11--> 00:54:13

give light. It is from this point of

00:54:13--> 00:54:15

view that Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala describes the

00:54:15--> 00:54:18

sharia of Musa Alaihi Salam as being radiant

00:54:18--> 00:54:19

that is shining.

00:54:26--> 00:54:28

We give to Musa and Harun the discrimination

00:54:28--> 00:54:30

and the shining light, and a reminder for

00:54:30--> 00:54:31

those with taqwa.

00:54:32--> 00:54:34

Even he also mentioned that there is light,

00:54:34--> 00:54:36

even he and Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala also

00:54:36--> 00:54:37

mentioned that there is light

00:54:37--> 00:54:38

in

00:54:38--> 00:54:39

the as he said,

00:54:51--> 00:54:54

However, what is however, what is the predominant

00:54:54--> 00:54:56

element in their Sharia

00:54:57--> 00:54:59

is radiant light because of the heavy and

00:54:59--> 00:55:00

burdensome

00:55:00--> 00:55:00

commands,

00:55:01--> 00:55:04

difficult tasks and fatiguing works and the weighty

00:55:04--> 00:55:05

burdens in it. He was was he trying

00:55:05--> 00:55:07

to say raima Allahu Ta'ala in the sharia

00:55:07--> 00:55:09

of Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,

00:55:09--> 00:55:10

he was not called Yeah.

00:55:11--> 00:55:11

It was always

00:55:12--> 00:55:12

called what? No.

00:55:13--> 00:55:15

Because the light of it is very gentle,

00:55:15--> 00:55:18

very beautiful, and very illuminating and sweet. It's

00:55:18--> 00:55:20

not burning like the light of the sun.

00:55:20--> 00:55:21

Like you see,

00:55:21--> 00:55:24

when the moon is full in the summer,

00:55:24--> 00:55:27

you enjoy it. It's beautiful, it's sweet, it's

00:55:27--> 00:55:28

very refreshing.

00:55:28--> 00:55:30

But when the sun is full in the

00:55:30--> 00:55:30

summer,

00:55:31--> 00:55:32

here for us in Texas, what do you

00:55:32--> 00:55:33

guys how do you feel about it?

00:55:34--> 00:55:35

Burning. Right?

00:55:36--> 00:55:38

Like you don't enjoy it very much. So

00:55:38--> 00:55:40

he says that look, at Torah, the Sharia

00:55:40--> 00:55:41

of Musa was like duya.

00:55:42--> 00:55:43

Even though it was referred to as noor

00:55:43--> 00:55:45

but more like duya because they have a

00:55:45--> 00:55:48

lot of burdens, a lot of obligations, a

00:55:48--> 00:55:50

lot of things that, alhamdulillah, were removed from

00:55:50--> 00:55:50

our ummah.

00:55:51--> 00:55:52

So for them, if they wanna purify

00:55:53--> 00:55:54

their thawb, if an ajasa falls on it,

00:55:54--> 00:55:56

what do they do with it? They have

00:55:56--> 00:55:57

to cut it.

00:55:57--> 00:56:00

And, when they eat, there's limitation what they

00:56:00--> 00:56:02

eat from the animal. Not like you alhamdulillah

00:56:02--> 00:56:03

when you eat just as long as it's

00:56:03--> 00:56:05

properly slaughtered this is it, you can eat

00:56:05--> 00:56:06

it all. Alhamdulillah.

00:56:06--> 00:56:08

So, there are a lot of limitations in

00:56:08--> 00:56:09

their sharia that

00:56:10--> 00:56:13

serves the meaning of saying duya not noor.

00:56:14--> 00:56:16

Let's move on. It says in regards to,

00:56:17--> 00:56:19

the different types of sabr, or why was

00:56:19--> 00:56:21

it called actually lite? Why was it called

00:56:21--> 00:56:21

lite?

00:56:23--> 00:56:24

The following page.

00:56:25--> 00:56:26

On page 375,

00:56:27--> 00:56:28

second paragraph.

00:56:28--> 00:56:29

Since steadfastness? None.

00:56:30--> 00:56:33

Since steadfastness is difficult for people and requires

00:56:33--> 00:56:36

struggle with the self and restraining it and

00:56:36--> 00:56:38

holding it back from what it desires, it

00:56:38--> 00:56:40

is a type of radiant light because the

00:56:40--> 00:56:40

meaning

00:56:41--> 00:56:42

of linguistically is restrained.

00:56:43--> 00:56:44

An example of which is,

00:56:46--> 00:56:47

the killing by restraint,

00:56:47--> 00:56:49

which is that a man should be forcibly

00:56:49--> 00:56:52

restrained until he is killed. The person who

00:56:52--> 00:56:54

who restrains him being as much a murderer

00:56:54--> 00:56:56

as the one who does the act. So,

00:56:56--> 00:56:58

basically, he says, look, the reason why this

00:56:58--> 00:57:00

is called, in that fashion as the yacht

00:57:00--> 00:57:01

because there's a lot of heavy,

00:57:03--> 00:57:05

self control over here. Like there is a

00:57:05--> 00:57:07

lot of burning desire to do something that

00:57:07--> 00:57:09

you control yourself from it and that's why

00:57:10--> 00:57:11

when you exercise patience,

00:57:12--> 00:57:14

no doubt it is actually considered duya insha

00:57:14--> 00:57:17

Allahu Ta'ala. He mentioned different types of sabr

00:57:17--> 00:57:19

and we have covered that many many times

00:57:19--> 00:57:22

to be patient with regards to fulfilling Allah

00:57:22--> 00:57:23

subhanahu's commandment,

00:57:23--> 00:57:24

showing

00:57:24--> 00:57:24

steadfastness

00:57:25--> 00:57:28

against disobedience to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and

00:57:28--> 00:57:31

also showing that sabr in terms of facing

00:57:31--> 00:57:33

calamities and the test from Allah Azzawajal.

00:57:33--> 00:57:35

One of those examples

00:57:35--> 00:57:36

he mentioned as,

00:57:37--> 00:57:39

fasting, which we already covered that subject because

00:57:39--> 00:57:42

fasting falls under Sabr as well. We're gonna

00:57:42--> 00:57:44

move to the Quran, InshaAllah, on page 376.

00:57:47--> 00:57:50

With respect to his saying, sallallahu alaihi wasallam,

00:57:50--> 00:57:52

the Quran is approved for you or against

00:57:52--> 00:57:53

you.

00:57:53--> 00:57:55

There are the words of Allah Subhanahu Wa

00:57:55--> 00:57:56

Ta'ala.

00:58:06--> 00:58:08

We sent down in the Quran that which

00:58:08--> 00:58:09

is a healing and a mercy to the

00:58:09--> 00:58:10

and

00:58:10--> 00:58:13

it only increases the wrongdoers and loss.

00:58:13--> 00:58:15

Before we move on to actually, how does

00:58:15--> 00:58:16

it, how does it,

00:58:17--> 00:58:19

we understand how it is considered healing

00:58:19--> 00:58:21

and mercy to the believers. But how does

00:58:21--> 00:58:22

the Quran increase

00:58:22--> 00:58:25

the wrongdoers in terms of loss? How so?

00:58:27--> 00:58:28

Is it the Quran itself

00:58:29--> 00:58:31

or the position that they have from the

00:58:31--> 00:58:31

Quran?

00:58:31--> 00:58:33

It's their doing,

00:58:33--> 00:58:36

their stance from the Quran that increases their

00:58:36--> 00:58:37

unfortunate

00:58:37--> 00:58:39

loss as a result of that. Reject Allah's

00:58:39--> 00:58:40

commandments,

00:58:42--> 00:58:44

running against it, stopping it from being fulfilled,

00:58:44--> 00:58:46

all of that it increases them in their

00:58:46--> 00:58:46

khasara

00:58:47--> 00:58:49

and their wrongdoing as well to protect us

00:58:49--> 00:58:50

from Sharan Balaalamin.

00:58:50--> 00:58:50

Now.

00:58:52--> 00:58:54

1 of the one of the right acting

00:58:54--> 00:58:56

first generations said,

00:58:56--> 00:58:58

no one sends no one sits with the

00:58:58--> 00:59:01

Quran and stands up from it untouched. On

00:59:01--> 00:59:04

the contrary, he either profits or loses.

00:59:04--> 00:59:06

Then he decided this ayat. Which is true.

00:59:07--> 00:59:08

You read the ayat and you read the

00:59:08--> 00:59:11

commandments from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and you

00:59:11--> 00:59:13

understand that you need to do that. But

00:59:13--> 00:59:15

then what do we do? Whether we fulfill

00:59:15--> 00:59:16

the commandment or

00:59:17--> 00:59:18

some other time.

00:59:19--> 00:59:21

So, if you say some other time, you're

00:59:21--> 00:59:22

not going to fulfill the commandment, that's a

00:59:22--> 00:59:25

loss. But if you fulfill the commandment Alhamdulillah,

00:59:25--> 00:59:27

now that's a barakah and khair, nam.

00:59:28--> 00:59:29

Amrud

00:59:29--> 00:59:30

ibn Ubshayid

00:59:30--> 00:59:33

narrated from his father, from his grandfather that

00:59:33--> 00:59:36

the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam said, the

00:59:36--> 00:59:37

Quran will be cast in the form of

00:59:37--> 00:59:39

a man on the day of rising. By

00:59:39--> 00:59:41

the way, do you guys know who Amr

00:59:41--> 00:59:43

ibn Shayb is? Who's his grandfather? Who's his

00:59:43--> 00:59:44

father? Who's his grandfather?

00:59:47--> 00:59:50

It's actually it's Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Aas.

00:59:50--> 00:59:52

So, from the companion. So, that's the chain

00:59:52--> 00:59:54

that he refers to all the time.

00:59:56--> 00:59:58

The Quran will be cast in the form

00:59:58--> 00:59:59

of a man on the day of rising

00:59:59--> 01:00:01

and a man will be brought who had

01:00:01--> 01:00:03

memorized it and acted contrary to its commands

01:00:04--> 01:00:06

And and it will become a dispute

01:00:07--> 01:00:09

saying, Lord, you made him bear me and

01:00:09--> 01:00:11

what an evil bearer he was.

01:00:11--> 01:00:14

He contravened my limits, wasted my obligations,

01:00:31--> 01:00:33

nose in the fire. No. A right acting

01:00:33--> 01:00:34

man will be brought

01:00:35--> 01:00:37

who had memorized it and safeguarded his command,

01:00:37--> 01:00:39

and it will become a dispute on his

01:00:39--> 01:00:42

behalf saying, Lord, you made him bear me

01:00:42--> 01:00:43

and what a good bearer he was. He

01:00:43--> 01:00:46

said, guard at my limits, performed my obligations,

01:00:47--> 01:00:50

avoided disobeying me, followed obedience to me, continuing

01:00:50--> 01:00:53

to argue on his behalf until it is

01:00:53--> 01:00:55

said, he is your business. So it will

01:00:55--> 01:00:57

take him by the hand, not letting him

01:00:57--> 01:00:59

go until he dresses him in a set

01:00:59--> 01:01:01

of silk brocade garments,

01:01:02--> 01:01:04

ties the turban of kingship on him, and

01:01:04--> 01:01:06

gives him a glass of wine to drink.

01:01:09--> 01:01:11

So that's the the definition or the meaning

01:01:11--> 01:01:12

of saying the Quran.

01:01:14--> 01:01:16

We're gonna move to the last point inshallah

01:01:16--> 01:01:17

the hadith. Number 8.

01:01:18--> 01:01:21

Concerning his word, sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, everybody

01:01:21--> 01:01:23

goes out in the morning and sells his

01:01:23--> 01:01:25

self, then he freeze then he either freeze

01:01:25--> 01:01:28

it from the slavery or destroys it. Imam

01:01:28--> 01:01:30

Mohammed and Ibn Hiband narrated the hadith

01:01:31--> 01:01:32

of that the prophet said,

01:01:34--> 01:01:36

people are comprised of 2 types of

01:01:36--> 01:01:38

2 People are comprised

01:01:39--> 01:01:40

of 2 types of those who go out

01:01:40--> 01:01:41

early in the morning,

01:01:42--> 01:01:44

someone who purchases himself and then sets his

01:01:44--> 01:01:45

grief free,

01:01:45--> 01:01:47

and someone who destroys it. In a version

01:01:47--> 01:01:49

which ad taqbalani narrated,

01:01:49--> 01:01:52

people are comprised of 2 types of those

01:01:52--> 01:01:54

who go out early in the morning, someone

01:01:54--> 01:01:56

who sells his self and destroys it, and

01:01:56--> 01:01:58

someone who pays his self as ransom and

01:01:58--> 01:01:59

so sets it free.

01:01:59--> 01:02:01

Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says,

01:02:10--> 01:02:12

And by the self of what prop what

01:02:12--> 01:02:15

proportioned it and inspired it with depravity depravity

01:02:15--> 01:02:16

or godliness.

01:02:17--> 01:02:19

He who purifies it has succeeded, and he

01:02:19--> 01:02:22

who and he who covers it up has

01:02:22--> 01:02:23

failed.

01:02:24--> 01:02:27

Meaning, whoever purifies himself by obedience to Allah

01:02:27--> 01:02:29

Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has succeeded, and he who

01:02:29--> 01:02:31

covers it with acts of disobedience has failed.

01:02:32--> 01:02:34

Obedience purifies the self and so it raises

01:02:34--> 01:02:37

it up and acts of disobedience covers it

01:02:37--> 01:02:38

over and makes it despicable,

01:02:39--> 01:02:41

so it sinks and becomes like someone buried

01:02:41--> 01:02:43

in the soil. So, basically, he's explaining the

01:02:43--> 01:02:44

meaning of

01:02:44--> 01:02:47

you could sell and exchange yourself in this

01:02:47--> 01:02:49

dunya for the akhir or otherwise by this.

01:02:50--> 01:02:51

The one who

01:02:52--> 01:02:53

makes a good exchange when you do it

01:02:53--> 01:02:55

with good deeds, and the one who doesn't,

01:02:55--> 01:02:57

obviously, do it with bad deeds. So, that's

01:02:57--> 01:02:59

the summary of what he said. So, finally,

01:02:59--> 01:03:01

to summarize the hadith for us, InshaAllah, he

01:03:01--> 01:03:01

says,

01:03:02--> 01:03:04

the hadith. The hadith shows that every person

01:03:04--> 01:03:07

either exerts himself to destroy himself or to

01:03:07--> 01:03:08

liberate himself.

01:03:09--> 01:03:12

Whoever strives in obedience to Allah sells himself

01:03:12--> 01:03:14

to Allah, and so he sets it free

01:03:14--> 01:03:15

from his punishment.

01:03:16--> 01:03:19

Whoever strives to disobey Allah sells his self

01:03:19--> 01:03:22

in exchange for a despicable condition and destroys

01:03:22--> 01:03:22

himself

01:03:22--> 01:03:24

by such wrong actions as required

01:03:26--> 01:03:28

the wrath of Allah and his punishment.

01:03:29--> 01:03:31

Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says,

01:03:53--> 01:03:55

Allah has brought from the that Allah has

01:03:55--> 01:03:57

bought from the themselves,

01:03:57--> 01:03:59

and and their wealth in return for the

01:03:59--> 01:03:59

garden.

01:04:00--> 01:04:01

Up until

01:04:02--> 01:04:04

his words, rejoice then in the bargain you

01:04:04--> 01:04:07

have made, that is the great victory. So,

01:04:07--> 01:04:09

that is the meaning of, the definition of

01:04:09--> 01:04:11

how you exchange a good exchange with Allah

01:04:11--> 01:04:13

Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala and you set yourself free.

01:04:14--> 01:04:16

Now, finally, he mentioned 3 things,

01:04:16--> 01:04:17

How the salaf Rahimuallahu

01:04:17--> 01:04:18

ta'ala

01:04:19--> 01:04:19

set themselves

01:04:20--> 01:04:21

free. At the best of their good deeds,

01:04:21--> 01:04:23

he mentioned 3 things actually. I'm gonna share

01:04:23--> 01:04:25

them with you quickly, Insha'Allah, on page 3

01:04:26--> 01:04:26

78.

01:04:27--> 01:04:28

He actually mentions towards

01:04:29--> 01:04:29

the,

01:04:32--> 01:04:34

and some of the salaf used to do

01:04:34--> 01:04:37

that interaction by setting themselves free

01:04:37--> 01:04:38

with their wealth.

01:04:38--> 01:04:40

The first one he says, a large group

01:04:40--> 01:04:41

of the right actions for generations

01:04:42--> 01:04:45

purchased themselves from Allah with their wealth. If

01:04:45--> 01:04:46

you guys see

01:04:46--> 01:04:47

it towards the bottom now.

01:04:49--> 01:04:51

A large group of the right acting first

01:04:51--> 01:04:54

generations purchased themselves from Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala

01:04:54--> 01:04:56

with their wealth. Of whom there were those

01:04:56--> 01:04:58

who gave their wealth as salafah such as

01:04:58--> 01:04:59

hadith al Muhammad

01:04:59--> 01:05:01

and and such as he who gave his

01:05:01--> 01:05:04

own weight in silver as salakah 3 or

01:05:04--> 01:05:05

4 times. That is called.

01:05:06--> 01:05:08

So, that's the first thing he says with

01:05:08--> 01:05:08

wealth.

01:05:09--> 01:05:11

They set themselves free by giving charity, so

01:05:11--> 01:05:12

much charity. The second one, some of them

01:05:12--> 01:05:13

used to strive.

01:05:14--> 01:05:15

Some of them used to strive in doing

01:05:15--> 01:05:18

right actions and say, I'm only working to

01:05:18--> 01:05:20

set my neck free, such as, Amr ibn

01:05:20--> 01:05:22

al Utbah. Like all what they do, they

01:05:22--> 01:05:24

say, my good deeds is I'm doing this

01:05:24--> 01:05:26

to set myself free, which is a man

01:05:26--> 01:05:27

in hadithin that

01:05:28--> 01:05:29

when you wake up in the morning, when

01:05:29--> 01:05:30

you give charity,

01:05:31--> 01:05:33

you know, you free every joint of your

01:05:33--> 01:05:33

body.

01:05:34--> 01:05:36

You kind of like ransom every part of

01:05:36--> 01:05:38

your body every single day with your act

01:05:38--> 01:05:40

of good deeds and act of charities. And

01:05:40--> 01:05:42

the last one, Wakanda Badeh Salaf, is going

01:05:42--> 01:05:43

to be on the next page.

01:05:46--> 01:05:48

One of the right acting first generations? And

01:05:48--> 01:05:50

one of the right acting self generation now.

01:05:50--> 01:05:52

1 of the right acting first generations used

01:05:52--> 01:05:54

to weep and say, I do not have

01:05:54--> 01:05:56

2 selves, I only have one. When it

01:05:56--> 01:05:58

is gone, I will find no other. So

01:05:58--> 01:05:59

he says by crying.

01:06:00--> 01:06:01

So the first thing he gave as an

01:06:01--> 01:06:03

example is giving a lot of charity.

01:06:03--> 01:06:05

The second thing is exert yourself in so

01:06:05--> 01:06:07

much good deeds and effort.

01:06:07--> 01:06:10

And the third one is really reflection and

01:06:10--> 01:06:12

crying your eyes out. There was also Ma'Shaheed

01:06:12--> 01:06:13

Muslim. The Prophet

01:06:14--> 01:06:16

mentioned the 7 categories of people who will

01:06:16--> 01:06:17

be under the shade of Ar Rahman

01:06:17--> 01:06:19

will be no shade but His

01:06:20--> 01:06:21

One of those qualities was what? What did

01:06:21--> 01:06:23

he say about this person?

01:06:28--> 01:06:30

Someone was reflecting alone,

01:06:31--> 01:06:31

remembering Allah

01:06:32--> 01:06:33

in seclusion

01:06:33--> 01:06:35

and start tearing up.

01:06:35--> 01:06:36

So, those tears

01:06:37--> 01:06:39

can be the salvation for someone. May Allah

01:06:39--> 01:06:41

make us some of those who listen to

01:06:41--> 01:06:42

the speech and for the best of it,

01:06:42--> 01:06:44

You Rabbi Al Amin. So, in conclusion, as

01:06:44--> 01:06:47

you can see this hadith, mashaAllah, is just

01:06:47--> 01:06:49

like the summary of the entire faith

01:06:52--> 01:06:54

which means purity is half of our faith.

01:06:54--> 01:06:56

We said that two meanings that we can

01:06:56--> 01:06:58

take from this one. Number

01:06:58--> 01:07:01

1, in regards to faith and there

01:07:01--> 01:07:03

are 2 categories that will open the doors

01:07:03--> 01:07:05

of Jannah for you as he mentioned in

01:07:05--> 01:07:05

the

01:07:05--> 01:07:07

hadith, so he says it's half in that

01:07:08--> 01:07:08

sense. Or

01:07:09--> 01:07:09

by saying,

01:07:10--> 01:07:11

to who comes

01:07:11--> 01:07:13

purity comes in 2 ways. There's a physical

01:07:13--> 01:07:16

purity and the, of course, the spiritual one.

01:07:16--> 01:07:19

So, Al Iman takes the spiritual one and

01:07:19--> 01:07:22

Wudu and and Ghusul takes the the first

01:07:22--> 01:07:23

category. So, the physical versus

01:07:25--> 01:07:26

the spiritual.

01:07:26--> 01:07:27

Then he says

01:07:29--> 01:07:30

saying,

01:07:31--> 01:07:32

praising Allah

01:07:33--> 01:07:36

and affirming his perfection fills the entire mizan.

01:07:36--> 01:07:37

That is the highest level of praise to

01:07:37--> 01:07:38

Allah

01:07:38--> 01:07:40

because it also includes what? Freeing him from

01:07:40--> 01:07:41

any imperfection,

01:07:42--> 01:07:43

it includes also his oneness

01:07:44--> 01:07:45

and glorification

01:07:45--> 01:07:46

as well too, which was the other word

01:07:46--> 01:07:48

that he mentioned in the hadith as well

01:07:48--> 01:07:49

too with us. He said,

01:07:51--> 01:07:53

it is light. And the prophet mentioned,

01:07:58--> 01:07:59

Salah

01:07:59--> 01:08:02

will prevent you from committing sins and and

01:08:02--> 01:08:04

making heinous crimes and this and that. If

01:08:04--> 01:08:06

you truly pray properly,

01:08:06--> 01:08:08

the light that comes from your salah will

01:08:08--> 01:08:11

be sufficient for you to avoid making these

01:08:11--> 01:08:12

wrongs and mistakes.

01:08:13--> 01:08:15

Those who give and they give charity, that's

01:08:15--> 01:08:16

a true

01:08:16--> 01:08:19

testimony for themselves and for their goodness because

01:08:19--> 01:08:21

you're giving your money away without having any

01:08:21--> 01:08:22

ulterior motive.

01:08:24--> 01:08:27

Steadfastness or fasting is also

01:08:27--> 01:08:29

is a radiant light and you could say

01:08:29--> 01:08:31

it's a ray of light because it's the

01:08:31--> 01:08:33

burden that comes with it, but still, alhamdulillah,

01:08:34--> 01:08:36

it shines your life as well too.

01:08:38--> 01:08:39

Quran can be

01:08:39--> 01:08:42

proof for your goodness or otherwise depending on

01:08:42--> 01:08:43

how

01:08:43--> 01:08:45

you follow the commandments of the Quran

01:08:45--> 01:08:48

or turn your back to them. And finally,

01:08:48--> 01:08:50

everybody is on a journey to Allah

01:08:50--> 01:08:52

So, you need to set yourself free.

01:08:52--> 01:08:54

One of those ways is by giving a

01:08:54--> 01:08:56

lot of charities, making sure to have a

01:08:56--> 01:08:57

lot of good deeds, and the third one

01:08:57--> 01:08:59

is have those moments of reflection.

01:09:00--> 01:09:01

Let those eyes

01:09:01--> 01:09:03

shed some tears for the sake of Allah

01:09:03--> 01:09:05

Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. May Allah make us a

01:09:05--> 01:09:06

man who listen to the speech and follow

01:09:06--> 01:09:07

the best of it.

01:09:10--> 01:09:12

InshaAllah ta'ala, our next class is going to

01:09:12--> 01:09:14

be on, April 17th.

01:09:14--> 01:09:17

InshaAllah. And it's gonna be back again on

01:09:17--> 01:09:18

Wednesday after Marib.

01:09:19--> 01:09:20

Let's see if you have any questions.

01:09:31--> 01:09:34

Question here. Are virgin women recommended just for

01:09:34--> 01:09:36

virgin men or all men? It seems a

01:09:36--> 01:09:38

bit unfair that a previously married man should

01:09:38--> 01:09:40

be encouraged to marry a virgin. If you

01:09:40--> 01:09:42

guys remember, we said that why we always

01:09:42--> 01:09:43

speak on behalf of the men in this

01:09:43--> 01:09:46

kind of circumstance because what? The men are

01:09:46--> 01:09:48

the ones who propose as well too. So

01:09:48--> 01:09:49

that rule is exactly the same thing for

01:09:49--> 01:09:51

women as well too. It's better for her

01:09:51--> 01:09:53

to marry somebody who has never married before.

01:09:54--> 01:09:57

Now, that's if the circumstances were ideal. However,

01:09:57--> 01:09:58

I have to

01:09:58--> 01:10:00

bring the reality to ourselves here in this

01:10:00--> 01:10:01

society.

01:10:01--> 01:10:03

Allah and Usdan, we have a high rate

01:10:03--> 01:10:03

of divorce.

01:10:04--> 01:10:04

We have,

01:10:05--> 01:10:08

single moms, single dads, we have widows.

01:10:08--> 01:10:09

So, people that

01:10:10--> 01:10:11

have been married before.

01:10:11--> 01:10:15

So, therefore, it's unfair even to use an

01:10:15--> 01:10:17

ideal situation like it was to be, for

01:10:17--> 01:10:19

example, in their time and to project that

01:10:19--> 01:10:21

in our time. And our situation is different.

01:10:22--> 01:10:24

Sometimes it becomes obligatory that a person marries

01:10:24--> 01:10:26

somebody, subhanAllah, to protect themselves

01:10:27--> 01:10:27

and also

01:10:28--> 01:10:29

to protect the person in their community as

01:10:29--> 01:10:31

well too. But many people are still waiting

01:10:31--> 01:10:34

for the ideal individual to marry and they

01:10:34--> 01:10:36

wait for too long. They wait for too

01:10:36--> 01:10:38

long and then sometimes, unfortunately, when they wake

01:10:38--> 01:10:40

up to the reality, it's a bit too

01:10:40--> 01:10:42

late for them. So, it's very important that

01:10:42--> 01:10:43

we take that into consideration with both men

01:10:43--> 01:10:46

and women. Do I look for not the

01:10:46--> 01:10:47

best option,

01:10:47--> 01:10:48

but look for what?

01:10:49--> 01:10:51

Because, remember, we said there are 2 things.

01:10:51--> 01:10:53

You look for the best option or what?

01:10:54--> 01:10:55

The right one.

01:10:55--> 01:10:56

Which one is better for you?

01:10:57--> 01:10:58

The best or the right?

01:10:59--> 01:11:01

The right one. Because the best one is

01:11:01--> 01:11:01

only abstract.

01:11:02--> 01:11:04

It's ideal in terms of theory, but in

01:11:04--> 01:11:07

terms of reality, your circumstances are different than

01:11:07--> 01:11:08

everybody else. Nah.

01:11:09--> 01:11:11

Does the waleema have to be from the

01:11:11--> 01:11:12

man

01:11:12--> 01:11:14

if the wife's dad insist on their own

01:11:14--> 01:11:16

event? Does that does the man still need

01:11:16--> 01:11:18

to do a separate waleema? What do you

01:11:18--> 01:11:19

guys think?

01:11:21--> 01:11:22

Does it have to be from the man?

01:11:24--> 01:11:25

What's the ruling on the Walima again?

01:11:26--> 01:11:27

Is it mandatory?

01:11:28--> 01:11:29

It's not. It's supposed to happen. So, if

01:11:29--> 01:11:31

the man says, you know what? I spent

01:11:31--> 01:11:32

too much on the wedding. I'm not gonna

01:11:32--> 01:11:34

do walima. Is it haram?

01:11:35--> 01:11:37

No. It's not good, but it's haram? It's

01:11:37--> 01:11:40

not haram. So if her father says, okay,

01:11:40--> 01:11:41

fine. I'll pay for the williamah. Would that

01:11:41--> 01:11:42

be okay?

01:11:43--> 01:11:44

I mean, it's okay,

01:11:44--> 01:11:46

but it's not the proper way to do

01:11:46--> 01:11:47

it. It's supposed to be from the man

01:11:47--> 01:11:49

because the man is supposed to be actually

01:11:49--> 01:11:51

offering all the celebrations that comes with the

01:11:51--> 01:11:52

nikah now.

01:11:58--> 01:12:00

Okay. So, there's a lot of questions about

01:12:00--> 01:12:01

counseling here Ajamal.

01:12:01--> 01:12:03

Since we talk about husband wife and communication,

01:12:04--> 01:12:05

how do

01:12:05--> 01:12:08

you give the best support when wife complains,

01:12:08--> 01:12:10

especially about kids? Because I always want to

01:12:10--> 01:12:12

shift her thought process to be more positive.

01:12:13--> 01:12:15

You see, the man is trying to make

01:12:15--> 01:12:16

his wife what?

01:12:17--> 01:12:18

Think like him.

01:12:20--> 01:12:22

When your wife complains, she doesn't complain about

01:12:22--> 01:12:24

you. She doesn't complain about the kids. What

01:12:24--> 01:12:25

is she exactly doing?

01:12:25--> 01:12:27

She's just getting it out. That's all.

01:12:28--> 01:12:29

All what you need to do is

01:12:30--> 01:12:31

just confirm those concerns,

01:12:32--> 01:12:34

affirm, you know, her situation,

01:12:35--> 01:12:38

give her that validation insha Allahu Ta'ala, and

01:12:38--> 01:12:40

sometimes the answer just can be, you know

01:12:40--> 01:12:41

what, may Allah make it easy for you,

01:12:41--> 01:12:43

Allah, I don't know how you do that.

01:12:43--> 01:12:45

Like, seriously, just understand it.

01:12:46--> 01:12:48

And, sometimes, she just needs a hug.

01:12:48--> 01:12:51

Or, sometimes, she needs really a serious solution

01:12:51--> 01:12:53

from you, being the father.

01:12:53--> 01:12:55

Come on and take your responsibility with the

01:12:55--> 01:12:56

boys, for example.

01:12:57--> 01:12:59

They're misbehaving, it's your responsibility right now to

01:12:59--> 01:13:01

take care of them because they are now

01:13:01--> 01:13:03

7, 8 years old, for instance. So, yeah,

01:13:03--> 01:13:05

it's a matter of mutual understanding, and I

01:13:05--> 01:13:06

highly recommend for husband and wife if they

01:13:06--> 01:13:08

don't really have that good communication,

01:13:09--> 01:13:10

you guys need to go and seek, inshallah,

01:13:11--> 01:13:13

marriage coaching. You don't have to have a

01:13:13--> 01:13:14

problem to talk to somebody who can help

01:13:14--> 01:13:16

you with it. You can, inshallah, improve the

01:13:16--> 01:13:18

quality of your relationship with that.

01:13:22--> 01:13:22

Amen.

01:13:23--> 01:13:26

At what point does her everyday anger become

01:13:26--> 01:13:26

abused?

01:13:29--> 01:13:31

Okay. That's not good.

01:13:33--> 01:13:33

No, these

01:13:34--> 01:13:35

are specific situations.

01:13:36--> 01:13:38

Should spilling on one's husband be tolerated under

01:13:38--> 01:13:41

him? How about being called kafir while she's

01:13:41--> 01:13:43

super angry and frustrated?

01:13:44--> 01:13:45

That's horrible.

01:13:46--> 01:13:48

By the way, this is extremely horrible. Unfortunately,

01:13:48--> 01:13:50

we live in a society that enables

01:13:50--> 01:13:52

the law enables the women sometimes, unfortunately, to

01:13:52--> 01:13:53

do that

01:13:53--> 01:13:56

because they know if the man, you know,

01:13:56--> 01:13:57

gets upset

01:13:57--> 01:13:59

or do anything else or gets physical, he

01:13:59--> 01:14:00

ends up in jail.

01:14:01--> 01:14:03

But, it doesn't mean the lady cannot end

01:14:03--> 01:14:05

up in jail as well too. She does,

01:14:06--> 01:14:08

if she also crosses the line. But, there's

01:14:08--> 01:14:10

more chance, a higher chance for the lady

01:14:10--> 01:14:12

to call the police on her husband than

01:14:12--> 01:14:14

the man would call the police on his

01:14:14--> 01:14:15

wife. That's the reality.

01:14:16--> 01:14:17

So, therefore,

01:14:17--> 01:14:19

these are horrible regards that are coming from

01:14:19--> 01:14:21

the man or from the woman. And, frankly,

01:14:21--> 01:14:23

if the lady, she behaves like this,

01:14:23--> 01:14:25

I don't know, remember, your husband, he deserves

01:14:25--> 01:14:28

that respect and if he's, of course, is

01:14:28--> 01:14:29

not getting it from you

01:14:29--> 01:14:31

that's a turn off and you're possibly going

01:14:31--> 01:14:33

to lose that relationship actually.

01:14:34--> 01:14:36

And if the man, though, if the man

01:14:36--> 01:14:38

is not actually Yani, he's stepping up to

01:14:38--> 01:14:39

his role

01:14:39--> 01:14:41

as being the man of the house and

01:14:41--> 01:14:44

being the respected one in the relationship

01:14:44--> 01:14:46

by doing the right thing with his

01:14:46--> 01:14:48

spouse, then, yeah, he needs to also earn

01:14:48--> 01:14:48

it.

01:14:49--> 01:14:51

Just being a man doesn't give you

01:14:51--> 01:14:53

the respect that you deserve in the relationship.

01:14:53--> 01:14:56

You need to, of course, perform your role

01:14:56--> 01:14:57

as being the man of the house.

01:15:00--> 01:15:02

What do you do when you have a

01:15:02--> 01:15:03

husband who is not flexible

01:15:04--> 01:15:05

and all who chooses his authority

01:15:06--> 01:15:08

over her to limit her from doing things

01:15:08--> 01:15:10

that are halal, like going to the masjid

01:15:10--> 01:15:13

or visiting her parents, and so on. Like

01:15:13--> 01:15:15

we said, you know, being a man doesn't

01:15:15--> 01:15:16

mean that you're a dictator or

01:15:18--> 01:15:18

a tyrant.

01:15:20--> 01:15:21

And we spoke about this in the last

01:15:21--> 01:15:24

session. We said that comparability brings people together.

01:15:25--> 01:15:26

What keeps them together, Ajman?

01:15:27--> 01:15:27

Flexibility.

01:15:28--> 01:15:29

And what is the highlight of flexibility in

01:15:29--> 01:15:30

the relationship?

01:15:31--> 01:15:32

Personal haloq, good manners.

01:15:33--> 01:15:35

So, if the lady demands things that are

01:15:35--> 01:15:37

completely off, yeah, the man has the right

01:15:37--> 01:15:39

to put some limitations. But, if she's not

01:15:39--> 01:15:41

asking for anything haram, just for the sake

01:15:41--> 01:15:44

of exercising authority over her, that doesn't make

01:15:44--> 01:15:46

you really, Yaniyah the real man.

01:15:47--> 01:15:48

Look at the prophet, salallahu alaihi wa sallam,

01:15:48--> 01:15:49

subhanAllah,

01:15:49--> 01:15:52

the most gentle, he never exercised his authority

01:15:52--> 01:15:55

in that fashion except in extreme circumstances and

01:15:55--> 01:15:57

situations. That's it. Salaatullah salamalai.

01:16:03--> 01:16:05

What is the best way a woman can

01:16:05--> 01:16:07

advocate for her own rights when she

01:16:07--> 01:16:09

feels as though they are not being fulfilled

01:16:09--> 01:16:11

or not being taken seriously?

01:16:12--> 01:16:14

Obviously, it's supposed to be a mutual understanding

01:16:14--> 01:16:15

between husband and wife, but if the husband

01:16:15--> 01:16:17

is completely trying to act oblivious or ignoring

01:16:17--> 01:16:19

her rights and so on, Allah says,

01:16:22--> 01:16:24

She has the right to bring somebody to

01:16:24--> 01:16:25

interfere for her.

01:16:25--> 01:16:26

And that's the purpose of the wali and

01:16:26--> 01:16:28

the whole nikah thing.

01:16:28--> 01:16:30

Why does she have a wali to sign

01:16:30--> 01:16:31

for her in the nikah? Because if she's

01:16:31--> 01:16:33

unable to go through with her demands or

01:16:33--> 01:16:35

her requests from her husband, then she has

01:16:35--> 01:16:36

a man who can come and talk to

01:16:36--> 01:16:37

this guy.

01:16:38--> 01:16:40

And If it wasn't her father or her

01:16:40--> 01:16:42

wali, then at least some authority

01:16:42--> 01:16:44

in the community can help with that.

01:16:45--> 01:16:47

But, of course, we always prefer that the

01:16:47--> 01:16:50

mutual understanding and communication to be better, inshallah.

01:17:01--> 01:17:03

Isolating the wife from her family and friends.

01:17:03--> 01:17:05

Can you explain this? Ibn al Jawzi said

01:17:05--> 01:17:08

the best way to discipline a woman is

01:17:08--> 01:17:10

by preventing her from speaking with other women

01:17:10--> 01:17:12

who are not religious or righteous,

01:17:13--> 01:17:16

who possess evil traits and morals, and preventing

01:17:16--> 01:17:18

her from leaving the house without oppressing the

01:17:18--> 01:17:20

need. If a husband is using this,

01:17:20--> 01:17:22

to isolate his wife from her family and

01:17:22--> 01:17:23

friends

01:17:23--> 01:17:26

who haven't done much wrong, is it fair?

01:17:26--> 01:17:27

I mean, look, this is not even a

01:17:27--> 01:17:28

hadith.

01:17:28--> 01:17:29

That's if

01:17:30--> 01:17:32

the statement is true about him, it's his

01:17:32--> 01:17:35

statement, and it speaks to his culture, to

01:17:35--> 01:17:35

his time.

01:17:36--> 01:17:37

Things are different,

01:17:37--> 01:17:39

and we don't go by the ulama statement,

01:17:39--> 01:17:41

we go by where this statement came from.

01:17:41--> 01:17:43

So, yeah, in regards to preventing

01:17:44--> 01:17:46

her from speaking to women who can be

01:17:46--> 01:17:47

a bad influence,

01:17:48--> 01:17:50

that also applies for a man staying away

01:17:50--> 01:17:51

from bad influence too.

01:17:52--> 01:17:54

And even a man can have bad influence

01:17:54--> 01:17:56

around him from his friends. So it works

01:17:56--> 01:18:00

both ways. But, yeah, if those those friends,

01:18:00--> 01:18:02

every time these friends come to your house,

01:18:02--> 01:18:04

the evening becomes hell,

01:18:04--> 01:18:06

or the next day we have a problem.

01:18:06--> 01:18:08

Similarly, every time this guy goes to meet

01:18:08--> 01:18:10

with his friend, he comes back with trouble.

01:18:10--> 01:18:12

That means there's bad influence happening over here

01:18:12--> 01:18:13

from both sides. So, yeah, he has the

01:18:13--> 01:18:14

right to say, I don't want to see

01:18:14--> 01:18:16

you talk to this friend, for example. She's

01:18:16--> 01:18:17

bad influence.

01:18:17--> 01:18:19

He has the right to say that. Does

01:18:19--> 01:18:21

she have the right to say, well, don't

01:18:21--> 01:18:22

talk to this Fulham because he's also a

01:18:22--> 01:18:24

bad influence? I mean, if she really is

01:18:24--> 01:18:27

true about this man being a bad influence,

01:18:27--> 01:18:29

she has the right to tell her husband,

01:18:29--> 01:18:31

please don't speak to this guy, I don't

01:18:31--> 01:18:31

like

01:18:32--> 01:18:33

you to associate with him.

01:18:34--> 01:18:36

If he doesn't respond to her properly and

01:18:36--> 01:18:37

insists,

01:18:37--> 01:18:39

you know, to be with that person who's

01:18:39--> 01:18:41

proven to be a bad influence, that sin

01:18:41--> 01:18:42

is on him.

01:18:43--> 01:18:45

But for her, she needs to obey her

01:18:45--> 01:18:47

husband and get her reward from Allah Subhanahu

01:18:47--> 01:18:49

Wa Ta'ala for it. I was reading here

01:18:49--> 01:18:50

from her family

01:18:50--> 01:18:52

the same thing. I don't know what's the

01:18:52--> 01:18:55

story, the backstory of this because sometimes, he

01:18:55--> 01:18:57

might have the right to say that. Because

01:18:57--> 01:18:58

every time she goes to her family,

01:18:58--> 01:19:00

they ruin their relationship.

01:19:00--> 01:19:01

And it does happen,

01:19:02--> 01:19:04

but of course not for everybody. So, this

01:19:04--> 01:19:06

is a case by case scenario. I can't

01:19:06--> 01:19:07

say that this is actually,

01:19:07--> 01:19:09

fair or unfair. It depends on the circumisas

01:19:09--> 01:19:10

of Allahu'ala.

01:19:17--> 01:19:19

So, can you please repeat the type of

01:19:19--> 01:19:22

light for fasting? He said, duya, which means

01:19:22--> 01:19:22

it's

01:19:23--> 01:19:26

a shining light, meaning like the sun rays

01:19:26--> 01:19:28

or the sun flares

01:19:28--> 01:19:30

because the the energy is from within, the

01:19:30--> 01:19:32

fire is from from within. Just like patience

01:19:32--> 01:19:35

requires what? So much heat of restraining and

01:19:35--> 01:19:38

self control just like fasting as well too.

01:19:39--> 01:19:41

As for al salakat to Burhan, just like

01:19:41--> 01:19:42

saying a lighthouse,

01:19:42--> 01:19:44

Burhan which means it's basically it's it's a

01:19:44--> 01:19:47

proof for your iman. No one gives this

01:19:47--> 01:19:49

much money without expecting anything to return unless

01:19:49--> 01:19:52

they truly have faith and believe in the

01:19:52--> 01:19:54

value of what they do. So, just like

01:19:54--> 01:19:57

a guiding lighthouse for the individual

01:19:57--> 01:19:58

taking him back to where he belongs to

01:19:58--> 01:20:00

Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.

01:20:05--> 01:20:08

The bad translation for the hadith regarding women's

01:20:08--> 01:20:10

abilities. Is it possible these translations were written

01:20:10--> 01:20:12

by people who wanted to taint the image

01:20:12--> 01:20:15

of Islam to a Western, English consuming, ethnic

01:20:15--> 01:20:17

audience? I don't think so. Actually, the first

01:20:17--> 01:20:19

time I read that was for Muslim scholars,

01:20:19--> 01:20:21

but they were not born here.

01:20:22--> 01:20:23

The first time I read it actually was

01:20:23--> 01:20:24

in

01:20:24--> 01:20:27

Muqtas al Bukhary, and these cars were not

01:20:27--> 01:20:29

born here. So, English is not necessarily a

01:20:29--> 01:20:31

native language. Yes, it's an education

01:20:31--> 01:20:33

for them and they are much more highly

01:20:33--> 01:20:35

qualified in terms of the language, but not

01:20:35--> 01:20:36

necessarily

01:20:36--> 01:20:38

as innate as a natural disposition when you

01:20:38--> 01:20:39

speak it, you know,

01:20:40--> 01:20:41

as your

01:20:42--> 01:20:42

tongue line.

01:20:43--> 01:20:45

So, therefore, it might be a misunderstanding

01:20:45--> 01:20:47

also the limitation in the English language, in

01:20:47--> 01:20:48

Islam.

01:20:48--> 01:20:50

No matter how much you try, in order

01:20:50--> 01:20:52

to translate Naqesat to Akwa, you have to

01:20:52--> 01:20:53

give a paragraph for this

01:20:54--> 01:20:56

because there are no equivalent words, word for

01:20:56--> 01:20:58

word, to make that translation

01:20:58--> 01:21:00

sound right. So, that's why we had to

01:21:00--> 01:21:01

explain, actually, in more details.

01:21:08--> 01:21:09

How long should you look at the opposite

01:21:09--> 01:21:12

gender without feeling of lust in a conversation?

01:21:13--> 01:21:14

I mean, you shouldn't be looking at all

01:21:14--> 01:21:16

if that's going to be the case.

01:21:17--> 01:21:18

But if someone, for example, is speaking to

01:21:18--> 01:21:20

somebody, like the lady looking at a man,

01:21:20--> 01:21:21

for example,

01:21:21--> 01:21:24

and as she's looking at the man, if

01:21:24--> 01:21:25

there's nothing, actually no feeling

01:21:26--> 01:21:27

of provocation,

01:21:27--> 01:21:28

they're fine.

01:21:29--> 01:21:32

But regardless, men, women, any moment of provocation,

01:21:32--> 01:21:34

they need to remove their eyes and set

01:21:34--> 01:21:36

their eyes away. It's more incumbent upon men

01:21:36--> 01:21:38

to watch their gaze when they look at

01:21:38--> 01:21:41

women because they're visual spatial and Allah Subhanahu

01:21:41--> 01:21:44

Wa Ta'ala made clear about men versus women.

01:21:44--> 01:21:45

And women are a little bit different when

01:21:45--> 01:21:47

it comes to actually to the looks.

01:21:49--> 01:21:50

No.

01:21:55--> 01:21:56

InshaAllah.

01:21:57--> 01:21:58

InshaAllah, we'll,

01:21:59--> 01:22:00

we'll stop here and

01:22:00--> 01:22:02

we will continue our discussion InshaAllah on the

01:22:02--> 01:22:05

book after Eid. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala

01:22:05--> 01:22:06

make us some of those who wouldn't settle

01:22:08--> 01:22:09

and give us a reward for the 4

01:22:09--> 01:22:10

Ramanah. And

01:22:11--> 01:22:13

Eid Mubarak and advance. And shout out to

01:22:13--> 01:22:15

all of you. We'll see you after Eid.

01:22:15--> 01:22:17

Also, one thing I want to insha'Allah, alhamdulillah,

01:22:18--> 01:22:20

since we have a very special occasion coming

01:22:20--> 01:22:23

tomorrow actually, next Monday.

01:22:20--> 01:22:23

tomorrow actually, next Monday.