The Muslim Family #28 – The Rights of Children Before They Are Born

share this pageShare Page
Tim Humble

Channel: Tim Humble

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:04

What are kulu filco Ronnie magia E

00:00:05--> 00:00:07

to carry

00:00:09--> 00:00:16

wha colocar La la la de la Lu while Mustafa al de

00:00:17--> 00:00:58

leeuw Alhamdulillah lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Abdullah he was solely Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi edge main as salaam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh. As always, we begin with the praise of Allah and by asking Allah to exalt dimension and grant peace to our messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, to his family and his companions. We're now up to the stage in this course on the Muslim family, where we are going to start talking about the rights of our children. And we had established already when we spoke about the rights of the husband and the rights of the wife. Is it from the Hadith that is mentioned regarding salmaan and faricy?

00:00:59--> 00:01:03

Probably Allahu anhu. And the advice that he gave to Abu Dhabi

00:01:04--> 00:01:21

when he said, In Arabic alayka haka? Well in fck, alayka haka, while he elica alayka haka. Throughout the Kula, the hoppin haka, and the Prophet slicin said sada Sandman, indeed your Lord has a right over you.

00:01:22--> 00:01:33

And you yourself, your body has a right over you, yourself has a right over you and your family have rights over you. So give everyone who has a right over you. They're right.

00:01:34--> 00:01:43

And so it's no surprise to learn that our children have many rights over us. So I'm going to start by asking you a question.

00:01:44--> 00:01:55

Where do you think the rights of the children start chronologically? So what is the first rate of our children?

00:01:56--> 00:02:06

Try and think maybe around the time the child is born, just before that, what is the very first rate that our children have over us in terms of

00:02:07--> 00:02:08

terms of order?

00:02:09--> 00:02:53

So inshallah you had some time to think about that. It's very interesting that many of the scholars of Islam they mentioned that the first right of the child is to choose a righteous spouse. So the first right of the child, actually as before the child is born. In fact, it's before the child is even conceived. The first right of the child is to choose a righteous spouse. And this is indicated by the height Ethan potty and Muslim from the Haida vihara. We've heard the Hadith before, and in every Salalah Hollywood cinema and now Anna, who called Tonka mala Turrialba, imagine how he has to be how would he Germany How would he Dini her father? Be there to Dean Teddy Betty attack? The

00:02:53--> 00:03:09

Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, a woman is married for one of four things, for her wealth, for her reputation or family reputation, for her beauty, and for her religion. Father follow up that indeed.

00:03:11--> 00:03:26

So the one wants to be successful, and the one who wants to get the blessing and the Baraka the success, that is the person who should choose that Dean should choose the one who is married for the sake of her religion.

00:03:27--> 00:04:14

And this tells us that if we look at the right of children, to begin with, our children's rights start with choosing the right spouse. And if we choose the right spouse, that's the best start that we can give our children by the permission of Allah azza wa jal, so that's where the rights of the children begin. And this is also indicated by another Hadith that we have heard the hadith of market, salah and the hadith of also NSP Malik in different wordings, but we'll just mention one of them to xojo why dude, and why loot for any more casual become, marry the woman who is loving and will pay you many children, for Indeed, I will boast of you. I have you have my own mouth, the

00:04:14--> 00:04:45

numbers of my own. Now here this actually this hadith has a strong evidence in it for the point that we raised. And the with the strong evidence is in the Hadith where it says for any more Kathy don't become, I'm going to boast of your numbers. I'm going to boast of your numbers, some of some of the integrations mentioned in your capital and become an MBA that I will boast of your numbers to the prophets. Some of them mentioned NEEMO casiotone, because I will boast of your numbers in front of the other nations.

00:04:47--> 00:04:59

The prophets I send them will only would only take pride in that which is good in the sight of a loss pinata. So he is not the pure number that matters to the profits or loss

00:05:00--> 00:05:45

I do sell him for him to be pleased. And for him to speak of the huge numbers of this oma in terms of, or in front of the other nations or in front of the prophets, yamaki. It's the righteousness of them, and the correctness of them. That's what matters to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So it's not the pure numbers that matter. But rather, it's the numbers of righteous and upright people. And that is a strong evidence as it relates to the prophets eyes and seeing tell Wedgwood why dude, and why would marry the woman who is loving and will bear you many children. And that shows you that the the rights of the children and all the righteousness of the children starts by

00:05:45--> 00:06:14

choosing the right spouse. And so here hopefully, you can see the connection between those two things between the statement as always, your word would elude choosing the right wife, the one who is loving on her value many children, and then the fact of the Prophet size and we'll take pride in the numbers, the huge numbers of this Omer yarmulke, and that will only happen when they are righteous or righteous offspring start by choosing the right spouse.

00:06:16--> 00:06:45

The next right that our children have over us is for us to make dua to Allah, even before we have children, for Allah to give us righteous offspring do something easy. It's not something difficult. It's only a few words. And it doesn't require any any hardship. It doesn't require any difficulty. And yet, how many of us neglect to make dua for the righteousness of our children.

00:06:47--> 00:07:18

And yet this is something that was from the sunon of the NBA from the the the established sunon of the prophets alayhi wa Salatu was set up a lot as I said in Salt Lake and Ron is number 38. On al Qaeda Zachary Europa. kohlrabi heavily millionaire Dune cavalry et al Qaeda, in nikka. Semi are here Zachary are called upon his Lord. He said, My Lord, give me from you, the re attend tayyiba

00:07:19--> 00:07:52

good offspring, offspring that are for you been that are good people that are righteous people. So panela from here, what we can see is we can see that the Prophet alayhi wa salatu salam, they called upon Allah before even having children, before even their children were conceived, they called upon Allah azza wa jal to give them righteous children. That is a small thing that we can do to benefit ourselves and to benefit our children. And it doesn't require any difficulty or any hardship from us.

00:07:54--> 00:08:23

And this to our it should not it should not be only before we have children, these two as should continue throughout the life of our children that we continue to make to our for them and we continue to ask Allah subhanaw taala to bless them. And one of the beautiful examples of this is in Surah Ibrahim, the example of Ibrahim what is highlighted by him or Abidjan, her then Bella amino which nobody weapon yeah and nabooda osnap

00:08:24--> 00:09:12

or be in the hoonah Valentina kefir Amina nurse. The mentality I need for India who many women are signing for in NACA for Rahim, Allah azza wa jal told us about to Dr. Ibrahim, when Ibrahim said My Lord make this city a place of safety and keep me and my children away from worshipping idols. So how will this do our Avi Brahim was made an alliance with generals best after he had a smile because we are told in the next ayah from what Ibrahim said Rob banner in the skin to mingle Ria dbyd invited revisar in Enderby tickle Muharram Rob Benelli up masala for Jan effetre tamina necesita, we eat at him also communist Mr Atilla allomi screw.

00:09:13--> 00:09:17

He said, My Lord, I have left some of my offspring

00:09:18--> 00:09:40

in a valley that has no vegetation near to your sacred house, my Lord so that they can perform the prayer. So cause a group of people to come to them and provide them from the fruits so that they may be grateful. So Paula, look at how the concern that Ibrahim had for his family,

00:09:41--> 00:09:46

and the two are that he made for them. So he made the dua

00:09:48--> 00:09:59

for allies, which helped to keep them away from a shake from making it partners with a lot and that's of course, the most important thing. And that's the greatest thing that a parent can ask allies or gel for their child for all

00:10:00--> 00:10:36

I like to keep them away from making a partner with a lot to make them good Muslims people have to hate people who worship Allah azza wa jal alone. This is the most important thing that any parent can want for their child. And it's way more important than their worldly life. But he brought him didn't neglect to make do it even for their needs in the worldly life. And Ibrahim's panela he left his family in that place in Makkah, Lee okay masala for the sake of the Salah, and that shows you how important the prayer is in the religion of Islam. And then he made to our all our cause a group of people to come to them and provide them from the fruits so that they may be grateful. He even

00:10:36--> 00:11:14

made to ask for what was the muscle have for them the masala dounia We are the things that they needed in their dunya but he linked it to the religion that all our give them these things so that they may be grateful towards you. So it wasn't purely for the sake of the worldly life. But give them these things that they need in this world so that they can worship you and that's how they're doing I should be it should be a servant for you in your deen. It should be something that helps you to progress and to get near to align your religion. So he may do all for them even in this in these needs that they had. And then the IRS continue until we are told that Ibrahim said Raja Annie Maki

00:11:14--> 00:11:31

masala tea woman's jewelry at robina what a couple of banal fiddly when you are at your wedding meanie Naomi Acoma hyssop My Lord, make me from those who establish the prayer and likewise my offspring, and my Lord accept my

00:11:32--> 00:12:16

my Lord forgive me and my parents and the Muslims or the believers on the day when the accounting will be taken. So this is from the most beautiful day that a parent can make for their children to two out of Ibrahim, which nobody what the knee and nabooda snom keep me and my children away from worshipping idols and they do it by him Robbie Gianni McQueen masala to you. I mean, it's already at Robin our takapa to our benefit while he while he do what he mean, he only Acoma ASAP. My Lord make me from those who establish the prayer and from my offspring. And my lord accepted to ask you to make to make the children from the people who established the prayer. They keep away from schilke

00:12:16--> 00:12:58

they established the prayer and also Ibrahim made to Allah for them and what they needed in the worldly life and made for them to be from the people who are grateful to Allah subhanaw taala. So all of this is from the evidence of the Sunnah of the Prophet alayhi wa salatu salam as it relates to making dua for their children, both before they have children, and all through their child's life, making dua for them and asking allies origin for them. For most importantly, they're our hero, meaning they're to hate the worshipping of Allah alone, and their performance of the prayer and so on. And also for what they need in the dunya on the condition that that makes them from the people

00:12:58--> 00:12:59

who are grateful.

00:13:01--> 00:13:48

We have another example also in the crowd we have many examples but another example we can highlight of the day that a parent makes for the child or to either the parent makes in relation to their children is a statement of Eliza gel was seen in Santa bydd here Santa hemella Tomahawk or ham or to Korea, her Wareham law if you saw the whole seller through Mashallah. And we commanded man to be to have a son to be good to his parents or to be have excellence towards his parents. His mother carried him in hardship and give birth to him in hardship. And the time that she carried him at the time that she weaned him is 30 months in length. hotter either Bella Bella Albertina Sena, until

00:13:48--> 00:14:33

when this person reaches their age of maturity and they reach 40 years of age, color or below zero need an escort are near medical Leti and anti la while actually they are an RM LSI hantuchova what else Li feasel realty in the tuber to La courroie in immuno muslimeen when he reached the age of 40 years old and he called upon Allah My Lord, give me the ability to be grateful to you for the blessings that you have blessed me with and those which you bless my parents with paler Look at the beautiful day to ask Allah subhanaw taala to make us grateful for the blessings of Allah and our children are blessing from Allah azza wa jal make us grateful for the blessings that Allah has given

00:14:33--> 00:14:50

us. And it shows you that even though our lives the one that gave you the gift, without the help of Allah, you can't even be grateful for the gifts that Allah has given. Or Allah make me grateful for the blessings that you have given me and those that you gave my parents

00:14:51--> 00:15:00

and give me the ability to do righteous deeds that please you were asleep, leave it and make my children

00:15:00--> 00:15:09

righteous, or correct, my children bring about righteousness in my children all of these can be taken from the word what are slightly fever reality.

00:15:10--> 00:15:13

bring about righteousness me through my children,

00:15:14--> 00:15:53

in the tuber to LA cower in the middle muslimeen I have repented to you. And indeed, I am among the Muslims, those who have submitted to you. So this is another beautiful example of that a parent can make for their child Well, absolutely physical reality. And that would apply, whether that child Eve, whether that child is righteous, or even if that child is has gone astray, or has gone away from what the parent would want, this sentence will also literally physical reality, it would apply to all of them bring about righteousness, from my offspring will also leave his or her Yeti, in the tube to a lake Indeed, I have repented to you were in the middle muslimeen and I'm one of the

00:15:53--> 00:16:27

Muslims who have submitted to you in Islam. So so far, we've talked about two rights of the children the right of choosing a righteous spouse, and the right of the of the child for the parent to make to ask for them before they are conceived after they are conceived after they are born and all the way throughout their life from before they are even conceived all the way until the end of their life, that parent continues to make dua for their child. And that's one of the most important reasons of success as a parent in terms of the way that you look after your child and, and the outcome that you get from that by the permission of Allah is

00:16:28--> 00:17:20

still talking about the rights of the children that come before birth, from the rights of the children that come before birth, our rights. One particular right that relates to the etiquettes of intimacy, I believe now best Robbie Allahumma, underrated color Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam low and a Hydra home either Raja and yet Tia Allah who call Bismillah Allahu murjan Nibbana shavon where Jen Nabi Shelton Amar das Oksana for India who in new del bainer Houma wallet on fee valic lemmya daughter Rahu shavon Avada this Heidi's narrated by Al Bukhari and Muslim in the Ibis rhodiola, one woman rated from the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasalam, that he said, that if a person

00:17:20--> 00:17:46

if one among them, when he went to fulfill his desire with his wife, if he were to say, Bismillah, In the name of Allah, or a lot, keep the shape Han away from us, will generally be shaytaan, Mrs. octina, and keep the shaitaan away from what you provide for us I from our children, then if Allah decreed for them to have a child from that action of this, the shaytaan would never hurt them ever.

00:17:47--> 00:18:28

So Pamela, what a beautiful etiquette, small remembrance. And this shows you that the remembrance of Allah is in every situation Allah Cooley had, this is the time when, in terms of intimacy, you would think this is the last time that a person would remember our last panel. And yet, look at the rewards of remembering a lie. So check that before the person engages in that they would say Bismillah In the name of Allah, or Allah, keep the shape Han away from us, and keep the shaitaan away from what you provide for us I the children that we that we might have from this with a child that we might have from this. And if allies or decrease them a child from that action of this, then

00:18:28--> 00:19:08

the child will never ever be hurt by the ship. So what are right it is over the child for just a few words, right? It is over the parent for the child, that the parent just says those few words at that time. Perhaps our last panel to Allah would keep the shape on away from the child because of this action of the parents and so truly the parents is not right. It's lame, but it's not befitting for them to forget this to our and then to, you know, Subhanallah they they might have the consequences of that as it relates to the shape on affecting affecting their child. Now, what does it mean though? For the shaitaan to affect the child what does that actually mean? an amendment no we are

00:19:08--> 00:19:21

him allowed to Allah He raised from alcohol, the Al Rahim Allah Allah to Allah and he said, What am Yeah, mille who I hadn't? ll Romani Fiji I'm a totally wild west West it will

00:19:22--> 00:19:59

call the reality said no one from the scholars held this hadith to be completely general meaning the shaitaan will never harm them in any way will never give them any Westwater will never give them any cause of deviation or misguidance. None of them held this to be absolute in every way rather than the profit sighs Miss talking about specific kinds of harm specific any specific things that that relates to that child, but it's not complete doesn't mean the shade pine will never ever harm them in any way, and will never ever whisper to them. They will never suffer Westwater they will never suffer harm they will never suffer misguide

00:20:00--> 00:20:38

Some of them said that it means that the shaitaan will never possess the child. Some of them said that it means that the shippon will not misguide the child and he completely away from the path of Allah azza wa jal and other things but Allah here, what's important we take from the statement of our call the Al Rahim Allah to Allah is that this isn't isn't something and isn't something general that it means that they will not be harmed by the shape I've ever in anything, but it means any a particular kind of harm that will not happen. But still even even if it is a specific kind of harm that will not happen. At the end of the day. It is absolutely a small thing for a parent to do that

00:20:38--> 00:20:55

can benefit their child in a huge way from the rights that the child has over the parents is for the parents to do righteous deeds before they are born. And after they are born and to keep away from the harem.

00:20:57--> 00:21:40

And from the evidences for this is the i o we mentioned is sort of the tool will Edina Allenwood Tibetans Oriya, to whom the man in and how can I be him sorry at home? What am I let's now whom I met him in shape. khulumani mbmi cassava Rahim. Those who believe and their offspring follow them in a man, we will cause their offspring to reach them to join together with them to be joined together with them in paradise. So ultimately, the righteousness of the parents is something which can have a very positive effect upon the children. That's what we understand from this is one of the things we can take from this is sort of taught that the righteousness of the parents can have a big effect

00:21:40--> 00:21:46

upon upon the children. And likewise in sort of calf alized told us

00:21:48--> 00:22:35

what can a boo Homer slyly hear those two orphan boys who they had a treasure that was buried underneath that wall and clearer and more said they came and they repaired the wall. What did a light switch has see for the reason that those children got that treasure? What can a boomer sila their father was a righteous man. And likewise in Salt Lake and Milan in a number 34 were allies we just had to re attend bow to him and bow will allow Semyon ID offspring, some of them from others, meaning that the righteousness of the offspring came from the righteousness of the parents will love will send me an idiom and Allah is all hearing and all knowing. So there is no doubt that the

00:22:35--> 00:23:18

righteousness of a parent is something which can have a big positive effect upon their child. Now ultimately, we need to understand something, we need to understand that a light switch as well as your was your tone with Wroclaw, nobody will be made to bear the burden of another person, nobody will need to carry the burden of another person. We're not saying that the child will be punished or because of their parents or their parents actions. But when the parent is righteous, this gives me a great deal of Baraka to the parent and to their children. And the benefits of the righteousness of the parent can continue on to bled to be blessings for the children by the permission of allies

00:23:18--> 00:23:44

origin, so everyone will be will be treated fairly and everyone will be given a fair chance by Allah subhanaw taala. But there's no doubt when a parent does righteous deeds before the child is born, after the child is born, when the child is young, when the child is older, this is a reason for Baraka to come to that child and a reason for that child to have ease and blessings. And there are so many ayat and a hadith which indicate this. And we've mentioned some of them, for example, the statement of allies which reattempt babraham in Bath

00:23:45--> 00:24:26

that will allies. We just spoke about it and Ron, and he spoke about the wife of Emmeline and all that she made allies, which I said thought reattempt about today, they are an offspring, that some of them came from others, the righteousness of the the parents led to the righteousness of the offspring. So give your child the best up. I mean, give an example, in the worldly life. If you were to save up some money for your child, and put that money sort of in a trust to help your child does that mean your child will never be poor, doesn't mean your child will never be poor, doesn't mean that they will, but it gives them the best possible start, that you could give them in the worldly

00:24:26--> 00:24:59

life and you save some money for them. You made a pot for them so that they could buy the things that they needed so that they could manage maybe in that transition between their education and their job, and you had saved that money for them. It doesn't mean that you're going to protect them from poverty. But it does mean that you have done the best that you could do for them. And ultimately, you can't say you've done the best for your children unless you are that righteous parent that sets that example for your children and tries to to to do good deeds and righteous deeds that bring about good for your

00:25:00--> 00:25:03

Children and bring about good for your family and Baraka for them.

00:25:04--> 00:25:49

And likewise, we can take a principle and this principle, you have to understand it right? We have to be precise in it, that the harm that a parent does can have an effect upon their child. Now, again, how do we understand that in the context of the statement of Eliza gel, well, it was your turn wizard, ah, no one will bear the burden of another person. So no one will bear the sin of another person, nobody will carry the sin of another person, no child will carry the sin of their father, no child will be punished Yokoyama for the sins that their father or their mother did. But that doesn't mean that they won't be a consequence, and an effect to the harm that is done. So let

00:25:49--> 00:25:58

me give you an example. Again, outside of the children, the parents just to kind of illustrate what I mean here. If you take the example of someone who is smoking,

00:25:59--> 00:26:02

the person who's smoking, the sin is their sin,

00:26:03--> 00:26:43

and they smoke in front of someone else. And that person doesn't, you know, doesn't encourage that or doesn't do anything to facilitate that. Then the sin is the sin of the person who is smoking, right? It's not the sin of the one who is not their fault. It's nothing to do with it. But does that mean that that one who is there will not have consequences? Does that mean that they won't get sick? No, they could get sick from it. They could suffer from it. They could have a sickness or a problem happens to them because of it. Because ultimately there's a difference between carrying the sin of someone and suffering negative consequences. We all suffer negative consequences because of things

00:26:43--> 00:27:00

that people do. For example, in the Heidi the one of the mothers of the believers when she said Anna helical Athena sila Hoon, will we be destroyed or messenger of Allah when there are righteous people among us? The Prophet sighs him said Nam either cancelled or Hubbert? Yes if that if the corruption in society increases. This is another example of the fact that

00:27:02--> 00:27:41

a person can suffer consequences because of things that other people did. That doesn't mean that they will have the sin of it, that doesn't mean that they will be treated unfairly, they will have a chance to make it right they will have a chance to turn to Allah subhanaw taala and they will not carry the sin of their parents. But that also doesn't mean that they won't suffer consequences. So ultimately your children can suffer consequences because of the harm that you do. And that could have an effect and effect upon you upon your family and upon your children. But they will never carry your sin they will never carry the sin of what you do. But ultimately they can be affected by

00:27:41--> 00:28:17

the consequences of the actions that you take and hopefully that is clear in distinguishing between those two things. That's what allies are gentlemen easy for me to mention in this episode, and in the next episode inshallah. inshallah, we're going to continue with the rights of the children we have many rights still to talk about. And until now, we haven't even reached the topic of the rights that come after the child is born. That's coming up in the next next episode, inshallah, to Allah analyzer generals best or Salatu was Salam ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi h mine, Salaam Alaikum. If you're enjoying these videos, and you'd like to keep up to date with all of the

00:28:17--> 00:28:23

courses we're going to be wanting to make sure you head over to am au add home.com