Akhlaaq in Relationships – Adam and Eve Healing
Channel: Tarek Kareem Harris
File Size: 7.93MB
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luck is about character and conduct in marriage. The decisions and behavior of husband and wife can either strengthen or weaken the marriage. A person's character is a blueprint for dealing with life's ups and downs. It's a set of personal rules that guide their decisions. The manner in which those decisions are carried out is referred to as one's conduct. character and behavior can be improved if we decide which principles and rules we want to live by. And we keep those principles in the forefront of our minds. The finest among us are those who act wisely with the heart, and in such a way that anyone witnessing us would be in or they'd be glad to call us a friend.
Believers are given hundreds of examples and rules for how to conduct themselves in a way that pleases the Almighty. Those rules are largely consistent with what science tells us about good mental health and well being. Holy Books and other teachings invites us to live by principles such as hopefulness, humor, generosity, having a strong moral compass, and so on. Good character is both an ingredient and an outcome of a good marriage. Character is not the same as personality. Personality is more basic, it's about one's instinctive tendency, character is about one choosing to do things that are better, more noble, more conscious than reacting on basic instincts. Because the
knifes dominates our decisions more than most, some of us exhibit great impulsivity and appetite for risk. Others are more logical and calculated, which makes them more careful and accurate, but possibly less responsive to change or emergencies. So personality is fairly consistent throughout life. But learning and applying good character can completely transform a person's outward behavior, and calm even the most troubled. In her personality. Good character can be learned by all it should be noted that one never forgets once in his personality. Because we are heavily influenced by the knifes whose basic drives are rather fixed, we will be dealing with our personality for the rest of
our lives, for better or for worse. That said, People act differently in different situations, they react to the situation rather than relying on their inner personality. Personality says so ineffective because they seem to imply that we would act differently to each other most of the time. That's simply not true.
To understand ourselves more clearly, we have things like prayer, reflection, and so on. To gain a better understanding of how we interact with our own minds and with the world.
The more Adam becomes aware of his own developing character, the better he understands how he affects those around him, and the better he understands their needs and does right by them. As a believer and a decent person. Adam embarked on a journey in his late adolescence to try to understand his strengths and flaws, and to work with his heart to grow his strengths, while compensating for his flaws as best he could. Adam did this because as a believer, he was obligated to search for and discover his highest character, bringing it to the surface at the level of his daily decisions. Some things comes naturally, while others do not. Despite his best efforts, Adam
made some mistakes over and over again. He became aware of his personality to the point where he made peace with the things he couldn't easily change and repented for his repeated wrongdoings. This is how it should be for us to Adams journey continued after he married, but it also took on another layer. Putting your effort into developing your personality during marriage will pay off both for you and for your partner. Principles of character or o'clock are classified into two categories, the truths of life and the rules of conduct. These principles apply to individuals as they do to couples as well. It is Adams responsibility to continue attending to himself. And this process is greatly
aided if he continues to communicate with ALLAH through prayer. And if he does things that help him retain and improve his own well being
in his marriage, as in yours, he will be responsible for the majority of his own well being. He owes it to himself when he's single, but now he also owes it to his wife. It is his responsibility to look after him self as part of his contract with Eve. And the same is true for Eve.
Adam and Eve entered each other's inner circle through marriage. They both tried to do the right thing by each other, and in the thoughts and reflections that encountered questions and uncertainties that were not fully addressed by the individual rules of character. Questions like
How much of my own pleasure should I now give up? Questions like, Have I irritated my partner? What can I do about that? How much should I expect them to put up with my quirks? Is it appropriate for our parents to have a say in how we live as a couple? How do we interact with each other social circles? How much of their happiness is my responsibility? What if I have a problem they don't understand? Did they do anything that particularly pleases or irritates me without their knowledge? How should I talk about that?
Eve remarks and how complicated things appear to be with Adam when she reads this same list. Knowing him as a partner, is not the same as knowing her brothers or father.
Adam approached the list with a slightly different perspective. His mind begins to sift through the possibilities for concrete answers.
In each have their own ways, they're both doing the right thing. Some questions will find answers, while others remain evasive. Some answers will work in one situation, but be completely useless in another. Adam and Eve have no choice but to do their best to discover answers for themselves. And by sharing their own solutions. Only by admitting and naming these issues, will they be able to find a solution that works for them both. They will fail and become mystified quite often, they will disagree quite often. With this is the joy of marriage, the ability to fail and disagree, and sometimes reach no clear answer, but to understand that you are there for each other nonetheless,
faith is especially important in this situation, because knowing that their maker is present is very reassuring. With God's help and remembrance, Adam and Eve can be more confident in admitting when they feel inadequate. It's deeply reassuring to know that the All Knowing all powerful, God is fully aware of your difficulties. There's an entity above all things that has told you that you will never be put through more than you can bear. This allows people to be honest with themselves about when things are difficult or when they feel overwhelming.
submission and acceptance are among the many benefits of being a believer. People can live with uncertainty without feeling as if you're doomed. As if answers will never come forth.
People are more likely to find answers or reach an agreement precisely because you have admitted that you don't feel enough that God is greater. And when you both seek refuge in him. It's a special kind of unity with a line mind. They both feel safe in the protective embrace of Allah's cloak, and their minds can rediscover optimism and humility. These characteristics are essential for perseverance and problem solving in difficult situations. Time and again, studies show that people who have faith have better mental health when they face adversity, and this effect is amplified for couples who share their faith. We get to see the truth together. And together we can feel even more
courageous. No matter how heavy the burden may appear.