Ibrahim Nuhu – The Nikah

Ibrahim Nuhu
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The A to Zed of Serbia series provides examples of the importance of engagement during marriage, including privacy in marriage, gifts, and avoiding double-standing. They stress the need for strong legal agreements and avoiding double-standing, while also discussing the legality of marriage, including the legal right to marry a woman who is not her father or her mother and the importance of strong legal agreements. The speakers end with a brief advertisement for a follow-up session on the topic.

AI: Summary ©

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			Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah who Allah Allah He was so happy
at mine. Am I bad? Salam alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh verhalen wa Sahlan mama haben Begum. I'd
like to welcome all our viewers to our third session of our ongoing series on the A to Zed of
Serbia, with our beloved che che Dr. Ibrahim? No. This is our third part of this ongoing series.
Till now we've covered the potential points that you should look into when you're considering a
spouse, the Sahara that's done the questions that you should be looking at the family of the spouse,
and many such similar points. The part one and part two of the tarbiyah would be linked in the
		
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			description below. You could listen to that and we move forward inshallah. Jeff, this is Aquila hair
for joining us today. It took quite some time to get here. We heard you had to fight some snakes on
the way.
		
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			Yeah, have you managed to do is handle a desert No luck here for being here with us yet again. And
we continue the series. So Jake, last time we left off when we were discussing about the
finalization of people getting together the families have agreed what to do. And now we reached a
stage where both the parties have agreed.
		
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			So is there such a thing called as engagement period from an Islamic perspective?
		
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			If Smilla Rahmanir Rahim, WA salatu salam ala Bucha Rahmatullah Amin and the vino habibi. Now
Muhammad in said, Allahu, Allahu Allah, Allah, he also he will sell him a word.
		
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			With regard to the question about the engagement in Islam,
		
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			as I have mentioned previously, that marriage in Islam is very simple. It goes with the cultural
practice of the people, as long as that culture doesn't violate any of the principles of Islam. And
the issue of engagement is also based on the cultural practice of a people.
		
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			If you meant by the engagement, the promise and the agreement
		
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			by the parent of the girl, to grant the hand of their daughter to a particular person who is looking
for that hand, this is not marriage, we call it
		
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			a record, Ill healthy
		
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			inclining towards the healthy by the parent, which
		
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			makes any possible person who's interested to that I mean, in that goal, you know, to stay away from
any proposal that he can possibly you know, send to the parent, once the family gave the approval
that this person is accepted and the let him continue with whatever he is intended. Then nobody is
allowed to, to propose to that to that girl we met
		
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			during that period of time, no, they don't need to make it in public. They don't need to announce to
any anyone. The only thing is, if somebody comes, they have to tell him that this person is engaged.
We have already promised so on So Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did not know about
Abubakar, promising that boy to give him his daughter, Aisha Alana, that's why hola went to the
house. She also was not aware of of this. Although she knows the family of Abu Bakr Radi Allahu
Anhu. But she's not aware of that engagement. And that promise Bible will come to those family.
That's why she went, when she asked her what kind of work I said, that is something between me and
		
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			those people. And as such, I cannot break my word. I really appreciate it and I want it to happen.
But please just give me time to go and see how to settle this case, I'll come back to you. So the
family of the girl don't need to announce to anyone if they do is okay. But they don't need to
announce to anyone. But if somebody is to approach them, they should inform him that this girl is,
is engaged. And if I know about the engagement, I'm not supposed to propose a hub to stay away from
it. Unless if the person who is given the chance and the permission to look for the hand of that
girl permits me to step investment he's going to step down which probably might not be possible.
		
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			Yeah, it would be very strange. You have to go and ask him first, and beg him to give you a chance
to which will not happen. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said
		
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			lie
		
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			Hello Kumala bear, well I said what I have to say to the prophets a lot. So my said no, nobody is
allowed to interfere, you know, to propose, you know any Oracle price or to propose to buy something
from another person after the agreement between that person with with another buyer. And the same
goes to the marriage, the prophets Allah sama said, if there is an agreement between the family and
the sweeter, then nobody is allowed to, to go and break that agreement to propose himself. So
engagement
		
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			during that period of time is not a marriage, she is still stranger to that person, he's not allowed
to look at her. And he's not allowed to speak to her unnecessarily, unless if there is a need for
that she's just a stranger, the only thing he has is the promise by the parent that they will give
him the hand of their daughter at the end of the day. So this one is okay, because as I said,
marriage in Islam is based on the cultural practices of the people as long as that culture is not
violating any of the Islamic principles,
		
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			checks in this period now that the engagement has been agreed between the two parties, can the
groom's family give some kind of gifts for the bride like a ring or something similar, that would
showcase that they've locked in the bride for their son? Yeah, if there is any culture that has been
followed by the people, when this happens, then people will be notified that the engagement already
took place. And this culture is not an invitation to the culture practice of what you call
		
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			as a non Muslims, which usually is based on their religious practices, then it's okay we go with
that culture. Whatever they give, we give the same thing. We follow that culture as long as the
culture is not violating any of the principles of Islam. gifts to the to the bride. Yeah. Okay,
generally.
		
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			Yeah. But they are not recommended. Twice? Yeah. Because usually, what happens is, if the family
refuse to give the data to that person, it will be an issue. And the question remains, those gifts
that He gave the bride, can he take them back? If the family disagree with him, and they don't want
to give him because he was making those gifts? For the sake of marriage? This is very obvious, even
if he says I'm doing it for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala is just a joke that the gift is for the
sake of the marriage. So if the marriage did not happen, they refuse to give him is he allowed to
take back his gift? Yeah. And the scholar said, yes, because initially that gift was given for the
		
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			sake of the marriage. They promised to give him a noun they are not given. So he does have a right
to take back his his gift. Is it good for him to do that? No. But as far as right is concerned, he
is allowed to take back his gift because he was doing it based on that promise, and they do not keep
their promise. And as such, he does have a right to look for his his gift. So that's why we fall
under the Hadith of the prophets. I seldom about the dog who eats up its own vomit for taking back
the gift. Yeah, that's why I said it isn't appropriate for him to take it back. But we also look at
the
		
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			the intention behind the gift. I come to the heat and I I tell you that this cup is yours as a gift.
But you have to pay 10 That's not a gift. My word is it's a gift, you know, I use the word gift. So
if you look at the action, in the context and the scene, you will conclude that this is not a gift.
This is a business proposition. And as such in the court if I am to take you to the court, which
will never happen but if I am to say Zion you have to pay me back and then you disagree. We go to
the court. The judge will ask me about what I said to you. If this is confirmed, the judge if he
knows Sharia, he will give me the right. You either give me back my my property or you pay what I've
		
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			told you to pay when I was given the gift to you. So Alamodome Eva Cassidy. This is the the Kira
which is well established in Islam based on the scene of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam in
the Malama Lu mini yet his intention with that gift is that the family will give him the hand of the
goal and now they're not giving
		
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			you good idea. So we go with the intention. He was intended to get the wife and he did not get so
can he take back his his gift? Yes, my right he has the right to take back his his gift but as I
said you
		
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			I Will not you know advise anyone to take anything that he gave to a doll. And at the first place
actually, I will not even advise him to make any any gift I managed to be made very simple. Two out
of between the family and they agreed, and then set up a day to come for the marriage. When he
called and as it whatever he wants to give us a gift, let him give it to her when she is under his
his custody. That's better for him or included in in the mark since we are going to have the Maha
Maha is also a California gift. Allah's Mercy is when terminal command Shane, you know, not enough
son fabuleux. Walton Nyssa, Soto, Katarina Nayla.
		
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			So it's a gift that you are given to the wife, why can't a person just include whatever he wants to
give to? I mean, to the I mean, in the Mahara and then pass it to her the same at the same time, and
this will close a lot of pages because those gifts also will go to other than, than the wife. Yeah.
		
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			We also mentioned that the despite that there being an agreement of some kind that or a promise
rather, that this marriage is going to happen.
		
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			We said that the bride is still as good as non Muharram for the groom till now. But
		
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			wouldn't it be correct to say it's not the same thing? She is still a level different as compared to
the rest? No, she's not. She's still the same person she was before.
		
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			So what are the etiquettes? In this period? Right? Because usually what happens is when you
		
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			from a cultural perspective, when someone says, Okay, I'm engaged to get married to philon They
already think that Okay, fellas, we're gonna get married. So there's the speaking and the talking
and everything. So how do we navigate this? What are the guidelines for this engagement period, they
restricted to the necessity. It is a kind of the rural and the need for a person to see the person
that he wanted to marry. The Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam I said, Fine, No, Allah you them obey
nakoma is wrong for a person to marry a woman that he never saw
		
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			the profit or loss of some asset, it is always better for you to know the person that you are
planning to live with, because they will help you to stay with her. And that staying with her will
last longer. Because you know, from the beginning, the person that you are going to be dealing
within, in the past when you when you marry her. So
		
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			if you look at the Sharia of Allah subhanaw taala, looking at a woman, the opposite gender is haram,
prohibited whatever the contemporary people are going to say, this prohibition remains until the day
of judgment Allah swatter make it prohibited in the Quran, and the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam, but then the door is open for that person alone. That's why he is the only one who
is supposed to look, not his parent. You know, nowadays, in some cultures, and it you know what I'm
talking about, you know, in some cultures, my father, if I wanted to marry, my father has to go and
see the wife first. Only when he approves, and in some cultures also, it goes beyond the Father. It
		
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			goes to the brothers, at least the father after the marriage, he's going to become the Muharram to
that, that says that I have married forever and ever Muharram but my brothers, my siblings, what is
the connection between the man and the wife, but unfortunately, they also have to see the why first
and approve, they have to induce Yeah, then I go on in my test, a big issue nowadays that we are
suffering from Antigua, suffering. And if you try to explain to the people that Islamically this is
wrong, they have their own opinion, they have the end, you know, what I'm talking about. So
Islamically, the only person who is allowed to look at a sister who is not his Muharram is the
		
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			hottie
		
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			the hardship, the hardship, is the only one who is supposed to look at her, look at that which will
attract him, you know, to marry this, this girl. So it's kind of harder on the ruler, originally, it
is prohibited for him to look at that system, but because of the high budget the need, because we
want this marriage to succeed and if he is to blindly marry the girl, he might face problem in the
future socially tells him You are allowed at this moment to go and see, as soon as he sees that
which attract him to marrying that girl. The system goes back to the original, what he call
normality. ruling which is prohibited even he himself also is not allowed to look at look at the
		
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			girl after that. He just have to see that which will attract him to marry her. Then that's it as for
talking and other things every single means in the way it was before. But since this is a marriage,
there may be a lot of preparations which affects their marriage. The house as I said that, you know,
he called her to talk to her about
		
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			Some of the unnecessary issues and restricts Himself to those necessities without engaging in
chatting and laughing and they can speak directly to her that can speak directly to her, if there is
a need for that he can speak directly to the girl, there is a need for that. But if there is no need
for that, honestly speaking, it is not even good for him to do it. It's better for him to remain
silent, she also remained silent, let this procedure remains until they meet each other, they will
enjoy that. Otherwise, what is going on nowadays ZDC people have been, you know, engage in political
communication and meeting each other for ages. That's why when they married, the marriage is not
		
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			going to be interested as it was intended. I mean, interesting when they have in that illegal
relationship amongst them before before the marriage, so it's not good for him actually, to have
that too much conversation between him and the one that he is planning to marry. So back to the
question, she is a stranger to him. Engagement doesn't mean anything except a promise by the parent
that we will give you, this daughter of ours in the future, according to the time that both of us
agree. But in terms of ruling, she is the same as any other system in the street. Yeah. Because
after the first look, if he is satisfied, if he's done then he can apply for the second one. And,
		
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			and does it once he is satisfied, then the door is is closed? Yeah, he cannot say Okay, whenever he
needs to look when he initiate an intention that he's not satisfied, go and look again, and then
come back. Yeah, that's why they said the another. Looking at the future wife, the one that you're
intending to married is for Alice data, not for esteem tab.
		
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			If a person is looking every time he wants to look every time he asked for looking, and I will have
doubt in this personnel. They said it is legal for Estela is to allow means you're looking for
information to see what does she has, you know, whether you can stay with her or not. lel is some
tap is not for enjoyment. That's where if a person look with intention of knowing who she is, but
then unfortunately, enjoyment comes he couldn't control himself. Your idea he is not response, he's
not held responsible, this is forgiving, because the root of the act is permitted. You know, and he
did not intend the consequences, but it just happened. It's not intended consequences, but it just
		
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			happened a good idea, but as soon as they started, then he has to stop the looking and look for
something, something else a good idea, but if he intentionally intended to enjoy at the first place,
he will be seen with that login, because we have to block the means to today, because she is not his
wife, she is silly, a strange one clear clear.
		
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			So, now moving to the next stage now, after the engagement period, now you would enter the contract
of the nicaya itself. So could you let us know what would be the pillars are the requirements for
the Nikka to happen?
		
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			There was a merger attended, you know, it took a few
		
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			few minutes, you know, in the man asked. That's it, I say.
		
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			Because through the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam, we couldn't find other than this.
Although culture also have a greater impact in the marriages. And Islam doesn't mind these cultural
practices as long as they are not violating any of the principle that are firmly established in, in
the religion. So what happens after everything is finalized, when they come to marry? The most
important thing that is needed is the agreement of the wife, she has to agree whether she is
		
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			a matron widow, or she is a virgin, she must agree. Does this agreement have to be documented or
just a verbal agreement is a verbal agreement is okay, the father or the mother or sister or anyone
who can approach her? They asked her and she agree without pressure?
		
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			So I'm so and so is looking for your hand? Do you agree with this person to be your husband? And she
gives an answer which is very clear to us, you know, or to whoever is asking her, because we just
have to use the channel that she can speak to freely, freely tell that channel her opinion and
happens and so if she agreed, then Alhamdulillah as the most important thing because we already know
that the boy agrees. He also shouldn't be forced by his parents because in Islam, forced marriages.
It's haram. It's haram to force anyone to marry somebody who he doesn't want to, to marry. So we
have the agreement of the boy the agreement of the girl and the holy
		
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			of the girl agrees
		
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			the holy of the girl has to agree if he doesn't agree the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam I said, you
might
		
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			not be ready even if he fennica bottle bottle bottle. Any woman that marries without the permission
of the Walid, this Nica is bottle bottle bottle. And so how to live in in places where the mother
was saying that she can marry somebody else by herself she can marry herself to somebody else
without the intervention of the holy but practically you don't see them doing that they are any some
of the harshest before in this regard, actually, you know, a girl if she's very herself to somebody
without the permission of the family, she might lose her life. But then you begin to ask what
happened to the mother they're talking about it's only good in the box is only good.
		
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			They can fight you might see a person fighting Yeah, this is the mother of she can but when it comes
to his own daughter, he will never agree with how to go against what he called the Sunnah of the
Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam. So Ali is necessary after the Wali we need the shoot shaver just
before going to the valley part, right.
		
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			For the valley itself, sometimes it happens that they are unnecessarily being difficult. What does a
person do in such a scenario? You mean the bully is not willing to agree? Correct. And there's
nothing wrong from the groom's side as well. Yeah, in this case, there is an advice. And there is a
legal right Islamically legal legally, the girl has the right to move to the next week. Grandfather,
Uncle Hassan, if he is having if he has a child, her brothers, anyone in the family from the side of
her father, because these are the only replacing the Father because they're replacing the father,
the father doesn't want to agree she moved to the grandfather, the grandfather doesn't want to agree
		
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			if there is another grandfather on top, she goes to that one, you will agree because there's one
there really, because of the people and they marry early and they believe in this freedom sometimes.
So she moves to the next rally. But unfortunately, all the Alia in the family are refusing to let
her marry. I mean, this person will look into this person.
		
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			This person's life, we found him, okay. It doesn't have any, you know, concern when it comes to the
we don't have any concern when it comes to his behavior and his religion.
		
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			There's no problem with demand. But they're just rejected maybe because of the race, maybe because
of the color maybe because of the country, maybe because of the language or any of those things that
people are welcome focusing on when it comes to marriage. So in this case, she does have a right to
move to the salon, or anyone that the salon appoints to the with the marriages in the country, such
as the judge, the judge can establish can establish the marriage between her and that person. And
she is doing the correct thing. Islamically she's not disobeying her father. And in fact, the father
is wrong in his decision to not let her marry somebody who is okay Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi
		
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			salam I said that a taco mentor Lola Dino will Holika who further with you, if you receive a person
who you have no issue with his religion, and you have no issue with his manners and attitude is let
him marry your daughter. And so Hala, this is the only way you know, you can relax, you know, when
you give your daughter to somebody else say, say you says he said do not marry your daughter to
anyone who's unrighteous. Because he's the only one who will respect how when he loves and when he
doesn't like her, he will not harm. If he loves her, he respects her. But if he doesn't like her, he
will not harm her. This is the kind of person we need. That's why religion is necessary. Because
		
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			we're human beings, sometimes we like sometimes we like but this person because he fears Allah, he
observed the Sharia of Allah subhanaw taala in dealing with a goal and his wife, whether he's happy
or he's not happy, he's not happy. It doesn't matter. The law of Allah subhanaw taala hysteria has
to be applicable in the house whether he's happy or not. So the prophets Allah, Allah Azza wa said,
do not refuse to marry that person when he comes. So if we realize that the family are just
rejecting for a silly reason, she has a right to go to the the court and the judge has a right to
marry her to that person and she's not disobeying the parent, but this is the legal right. She can
		
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			do this. But if a person is to ask me, my personal advice, I will tell her try convince the parent
before
		
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			you will lie. It's not easy to live a life where you cannot come back to your parent, even as a
brother, and I'm not even talking about the sisters. This one is more difficult. The sister doesn't
have a link and a connection and place where she can report her cases. You know, if the husband
dies, Where does she go? You know
		
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			If let's say the marriage doesn't work or succeed, you know, she's going to be divorced sometimes.
Where does she go? You know, all of these things, we have heard stories which are really negative,
which forced me to always advise whoever asked me, What should I do, I will tell them Be patient,
try your best resist, do not accept the one that is not qualified, although it is introduced by your
parent, but still don't accept that person, but at the same time, do not marry without the
permission out of the fear that in the future, the marriage might not what he calls succeed, and the
NGO will get into, into trouble. So there is an advice and that is what we call a legal right that a
		
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			person has I learned this from Rasulullah Salallahu Alaihe Salam, one very well rejected her
husband, and the prophets and the husband really loved her so much. So the prophets Allah Allah sama
sees the way this husband is even crying, and he doesn't mind to follow her in the street, you know,
and bury her in front of everyone. Please, please agree with us to go back to the marriage but she
doesn't want because she was asleep. And he's asleep. And is the story of Mary.
		
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			And movie. So if the if, if one of them get the freedom, especially the sister, she has a right to
divorce the husband. So when she heard that,
		
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			she said he also lied. This is my wife said yes. He said,
		
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			God, immediately she divorced her husband, she doesn't want to stay with him. So that you can
understand why in Islam at the local limit
		
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			BISAC
		
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			divorce is placed at the hands of the person who has the power in the house and that's the husband.
Yeah, because the husband before he devotes, he thinks a lot although nowadays the divorce becomes
like drinking water, but in the past and wherever, you know, alcohol, you know, things that are
properly.
		
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			Brothers before the divorce, they think a lot
		
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			to look around because you have to go through, you know, another difficulty for you to get another
wife, financial expenses, and also so many things are involved. But the wife are emotionally so this
is more emotional than the brothers. What can lead the brother to divorce, if it is having a brother
will think a lot before he finalized the divorce but a sister might not wait. She just divorced the
person. So this sister she told the province a lot listen to her it was so the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam,
		
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			when he sees the way this man was
		
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			fighting for that marriage to come back again. Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam I told her Marina
Lola jaati Why can't you just let him come back to the marriage? She said he also la hetta morani
Um, to hear Alia she said he also lie. Are you commanded me? Or you just advise him? He said I'm
just advised.
		
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			And then she decided to take her right because she knows that there is a legal right. She has which
is the divorce. She can finalize it and that's it. So she said yes, well, I don't want him and the
Prophet sallallahu Elisa did not fight her in that right, which she has. So there is a right and
there is an advice also, a person might be having a legal right. But you will tell him advice
		
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			advisedly it is not advisable for you to go with this. So this is my advice to any sister who is
facing these challenges. And we have a lot these days a lot a lot, unfortunately, and a sister who
is facing these challenges, to be patient to resist and to try every single means to convince the
parent to at least agree with the marriage, even if they're not happy, but to at least agree so that
she can have a backup
		
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			when something happens she comes back they will accommodate and accept her they will blame a lot but
they will still accept her and this is better for her than doing the marriage without their
permission checks going back to the conditions that we were discussing, we said that there needs to
be the agreement of the groom the agreement of the bride and then we have the permission of the Wali
okay then
		
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			the rest these are all you know, advice I always give that a person shouldn't
		
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			marry without the permission of his parent. You know as a brother, your father whether he agrees
your mother whether she agrees or not. If you are to marry the marriage is legal Islamically wali is
not required for your marriage as a as a man. You know, it is only a requirement when it comes to
marry sister.
		
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			So is it good for a person to marry without the permission of his parent? No, it is not.
		
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			is absolutely not good. For here we're talking about the
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:39
			groan, yeah, I'm talking about the group, it is not good for him to marry, if his father doesn't
want it, or his mother doesn't want it by right, he has a right to go ahead and do. If that woman
qualifies, he does have a right to, to marry. But it is not advisable to do. And that's why parents
should be very careful, you know, should understand that this person is the one who is going to be
living with this wife. But unfortunately, most of the parents nowadays, don't want to understand,
I'm not saying they don't understand, no, they don't want to understand that this person is going to
be the one who will be living with this girl, they are not the one who will be living with her. And
		
00:30:39 --> 00:31:12
			as such, they should let him choose whomsoever he wants, and ask Allah subhanaw taala, to bless the
marriage and support him in that, so that he can make a success. So what happens is that as if a
person married without the permission of his parents, I'm talking about the guru, and Subhanallah,
you will be living with your parents, they just want to see you, but they don't want to see your
wife. And this is going to affect your relationship with your wife. Because trust me, at the first
part of the marriage, she will not mind that much. But
		
00:31:13 --> 00:31:56
			as far as the time goes, there will be a time when she sees the amount of the hatred from half your
parent, you know, to how that is going to affect your relationship with with her also. And then of
the day, she might start to resist, you know harshly and her behavior towards your parents is going
to be very negative, which will also provoke your anger towards towards her. So it's not good for a
person to marry without the permission of his of his parent. And the same goes to the mother of the
goal. If the mother is not happy with the marriage, a person should pose a bit, try to see how to
convince the mother of the golfers before the marriage. Because trust me, some of the mothers, they
		
00:31:56 --> 00:32:36
			have a bigger influence on their daughters, she might create a lot of problem for you in the house
through the daughter. And the things which you will be saying, which the daughter might be
convinced, and that creates a lot of headache, you know, for you in in the house. And also it's not
good for you to visit your in laws, but you know that the mother doesn't want to meet you and she
didn't want to see you. She's not happy with her. And she's not happy with that seeing you in the in
the place, you will never feel comfortable. So that's why I always say that these five pillars that
I, I always mentioned is another pillars of marriage. But these are the components that I advise a
		
00:32:36 --> 00:33:11
			person not to marry if one of them is not in agreement with that, with that marriage. The Gulf, the
bride, her parent, and your parent. Any one of them who disagree with the marriage is good for a
person to pause a bit. Don't give up. But keep fighting and be patient. delay the marriage a bit
until the time you get everyone on the same page with you. Cha cha ching going on going back to the
Nikka itself. What are the requirements for the Nicca to be considered valid? Yeah. So we mentioned
the Wali and we mentioned the agreement of both
		
00:33:12 --> 00:33:16
			the boy and the girl. And the next one is should
		
00:33:17 --> 00:33:30
			we need only to minimum to say according to the best opinion of majority of the scholars we need
should because that hadith says we're Shahid Illa. Allah, you know Ushahidi,
		
00:33:31 --> 00:33:35
			the prophet returned any specific gender for the witnesses?
		
00:33:36 --> 00:33:41
			The best is to bring the witnesses from the brothers. Yeah, because what
		
00:33:43 --> 00:34:25
			the reason why the witnesses are established is because we want to avoid people accusing that person
of having a relationship with a strange woman. And usually those who goes out in business and all of
these things are the brothers although nowadays things are changing. So shy, they are the norm is
this show this show who they are from? From the brothers? Yeah. So you have two brothers to witness
the event. At least two brothers. The Maliki's callers, you know, they prefer actually la LAN. Lan
means making the marriage what he call
		
00:34:26 --> 00:34:59
			known to the community. Public isn't that the Vailima know what he means is something else.
Announcing the marriage will Emma is part of that announcement, but to make it public, you know, to
tell people to use any any means, you know, to announce it. That's much stronger than the witnesses
because you have only two witnesses. But if you announce the marriage to the community, everyone
knows that. So on so on, so person is married, even if they don't know the wife, but they know he's
married. So tomorrow when they see him with a girl, they will not have that negative
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:43
			perception about, about about him. Yeah, so it is necessarily a Laila and that's why secret marriage
in Islam is haram for person to marry in secret, but it has to be announced in the place where the
marriage is, is taking is taking place. So we need this should shy the added. And also if we need
the marriage to be to be announced to the to the people and the prophets of Allah Allah sama for
this purpose he allowed that people can use sisters can use a dove. It says well, the river Allah He
the food so they can use the basis, the place where the vast majority of the scholars agree that
they could be used out of all of the musical instruments. You know, this is the only exception to
		
00:35:43 --> 00:36:22
			Professor lollies like game, when there is a marriage for people to use that kind of musical
instrument alone, specific to the sisters only for the sisters, for sure if they use it, the
brothers also can hear right because they cannot. This is the sound that comes out. Right? But it is
not meant for the brothers. That's why it is just supposed to be done. And then the case is is
close. They cannot record it. And then people won't listen to it from time to time. No, it doesn't
work like that. It is only for that moment of time. And after that then is over. They're not
supposed to use it the prohibition goes back to its original form. Because is haram Islamically is
		
00:36:22 --> 00:36:34
			haram. publ. is haram. The drum is haram and is haram but the prophets Allah so Allah gave an
exception for the sisters during the marriage. Yeah. The other exception, which some scholars
		
00:36:35 --> 00:36:36
			mentioned, you know, is,
		
00:36:38 --> 00:36:41
			I guess chefmaster also in his book, to have you allow upon.
		
00:36:42 --> 00:37:23
			He was mentioned in this second moment when a young boy young girl is playing with the diff on the
DL rate. But we have to see the context here. You know, the boy or the girl, the young before the
age of maturity, they brought the from anywhere. They started playing on the day of eight, we just
close our eyes. We don't have we don't we don't take the day off and give it to them. But if they
come and play, we keep quiet in the windowsill as alasa did, but we don't pass it to them and tell
them one play with them. Because this is a no we don't do that. Yeah, but if we see them do it. We
just keep quiet. This is exactly what the process allows somebody because he never asked people to
		
00:37:23 --> 00:38:00
			take different give to the kids so that they can play when they do have eight. But that event
happens when they found a girl came and she was playing with the dog in the presence of Rasulullah
sallallahu Sallam and he wasn't listening to him. He was between asleep and awake when a boy came
and said Salah salam ala Rasulillah you know, the girl ran away when she threw it away. And that
means the community, Muslim community at the time knows that these things are wrong to be played.
And then he told the prophets Allah Azza wa Salam is Maurice Chapin. Next to us hula is Allah's he
call it miss Mara shaytan. If it is wrong, Rasul Allah sama will tell him and we will carry you
		
00:38:00 --> 00:38:39
			along. But he did not correct that statement. That's why the scholars use this hadith, contrary to
the way the Liberals are using it, to say that this is one of the greatest evidence that shows the
dove is also haram because when he called me Smartsheet, and the prophets Allah sama did not make
any correction. And we know that Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam and never kept quiet when there is
something going on in the wrong in the wrong way. So sisters can use it on their marriage. And they
can use it to announce the marriage, as I said, because one of the main purpose of having that
marriage in that way and the shoot is the marriage to be in public knowledge to be in public. And as
		
00:38:39 --> 00:38:42
			I said, secret marriages in Islam
		
00:38:43 --> 00:38:45
			is all you know, usually when the
		
00:38:46 --> 00:38:57
			do people do secret marriages, and they're already married? Yeah, when they already married, he
wants a second marriage to another place. And the funniest one I heard is the one that married in
		
00:38:58 --> 00:39:23
			humanity in Riyadh. And his second wife, the first wife is in another state in Saudi Arabia. So he
was having the second marriage in Riyadh. And the first one doesn't know about about it. So he was
complaining to his friend that said, Suhana law before he even meets the second wife, after the
marriage, the first wife knows about the marriage.
		
00:39:24 --> 00:39:35
			And then, so he was with a friend asked him this marriage, how does it happen? He said, This is a
secret marriage, we try to make it in secret. He said how many people attended that marriage? He
said only 400 people.
		
00:39:38 --> 00:39:43
			So the guy replied to me, he said do you think those 400 People are sheep in front of you?
		
00:39:45 --> 00:39:59
			And so Had Allah so so this secret marriage is haram because it has a lot of Subhanallah negative
consequences. People die. You know when inheritance comes this family are claiming the inheritance
and the other family will say we don't know
		
00:40:00 --> 00:40:38
			You know, all of these things will happen, you know, a person left the life and leave this fitna
amongst the families. Yeah. And also, if they don't know who they are, there might be a marriage
between them because they are in another state. And this one, nobody knows who is who, unless if he
gave them those see, oh, they think properly and look for the other family and introduce themselves,
you know, and do it in the very legal way. Otherwise, you know, you might find somebody from this
family, Marian from the other, the other family that's big, muscular, yeah, that's why Islam don't
tolerate this eight is watching, for marriage to be announced, at least in the priests in the place
		
00:40:38 --> 00:41:01
			where the marriage is, is taking place. There are for instance, personality. In India, the ACA took
place in India, that was the place where the marriage should be, should be announced. He's going to
live in another country in Saudi it doesn't need to tell everyone you know, yeah, of course, who
close friends you know, tell them that he married and that one usually according to the norm, he has
already informed them that he is going to is going to
		
00:41:02 --> 00:41:13
			check coming back to the Nikka part itself. Right. So, usually, you will see along with these people
that we mentioned, you'd also have any mom or someone we missed one
		
00:41:14 --> 00:41:53
			one requirement in the act of the watch with the MA Yeah, it has to Mara has to be there. Yeah. So,
this the agreement, the only the shoot and then the Maha, which is supposed to be given by by the
husband. And then does it enable COBOL to Java COBOL is that the Wali is saying to the to the group,
as the watch to cave, Nettie in any language, not necessarily Arabic language, in any language,
marry you, my daughter, you know, Allah Maha COVID, hookah upon a Maha which is
		
00:41:55 --> 00:42:02
			estimated as so and so amount. So if you say this and then the brother says
		
00:42:03 --> 00:42:05
			COVID Accept. That's it.
		
00:42:06 --> 00:42:07
			manages that.
		
00:42:09 --> 00:42:48
			Jake, if you're just backtracking a bit, right when he spoke about Mahara? Why is there Mahara in
the first place? Because a lot of the time you get questions like Is this some kind of a transaction
where the groom is paying some kind of money and then he's getting a bride in return? Or what's the
benefit of even having Mahara in the first place? First of all, Mahara is there because of the
Sharia of Allah subhanaw taala. And it is always good to understand this fact, correctly, that the
real wisdom behind any Riba in Islam is that this is a command from Allah subhanho wa taala. Because
sometimes when you go deeper, if Allah did not tell us the wisdom, we believe there is a wisdom in
		
00:42:48 --> 00:43:18
			any of the commands of Allah subhanaw taala there is no command that ever came from Allah without
wisdom, because not having wisdom and objective and doing things is playing and Allah doesn't play.
There is the wisdom behind anything that Allah is mortal ask us to do. But sometimes Allah subhanaw
taala might not, you know, expose this wisdom to us to test our obedience. Do it like this, we just
have to do it like that, whether we understand the wisdom or not, but let's call us however, they
said one of the wisdom
		
00:43:20 --> 00:43:27
			and the reason why Maha is supposed to be there is to differentiate between marriage and Sefa.
That's why the MaHA is going to be
		
00:43:28 --> 00:43:50
			given not to the wife directly, you know, in front of our parents, schools and people who are there.
Xena is not like that. Xena is between the girl and the person. He enjoys whatever he wants to
enjoy, and then he pays her for that with equal enjoyment. That's why even the prophets Allah Azza
wa call is Muhammad that money that he's given to the
		
00:43:52 --> 00:44:17
			to the to the prostitute, Sister Rosa Lhasa call it modern buddy Maha Maha given to a prostitute
sister. They get it because they almost look similar, except that the one we do in Islam. It is
after the agreement to let them marry which is based on responsibility. You know that one is just
Xena enjoying and then going but marriage in Islam is enjoyment and responsibility.
		
00:44:18 --> 00:44:24
			enjoyment as manager is not just based on love and all of those shallow things. No, it's a heavy
responsibility.
		
00:44:25 --> 00:44:59
			heavy responsibility between the husband and the wife. So he is paying that money after the
agreement by the parent and by how that they are willing to stay forever and ever together. That
doesn't mean he cannot divorce but the intention to stay in that marriage has to be has to be there
which is different from from from Xena. It can be no time restraint in the Monica contract. There is
no there shouldn't be if this if this stipulated time then it will become moto. Yeah the one that is
prohibited in Islam and
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:11
			The only sects that legalize it, to my knowledge, they are the Shia. They're the only one who make
it illegal, you know, so that they can continue what they call legalizing Zina, but
		
00:45:13 --> 00:45:53
			according to them through the, the religion, right, and that's why you have a lot of Shabaab being
deceived, you know, to accept the she's in because they have this enjoyment free of charge, you can
marry a sister just for one second, one minutes one day, you know, the Center said it was he said,
You know, so so so if there is a simple stipulation of a time, you know, to stay in that marriage,
you do become motor if both family you know, are aware of this stipulation, but if the husband is
only one who knows that he is going to divorce this girl, according to the best opinion, this is
marriage that is called as Awaji Binya talaaq, marriage with the intention of divorce. According to
		
00:45:53 --> 00:46:37
			the best opinion, this marriage is haram is cheating. Nobody will accept to for his daughter, even
those who do it and so Hanalei, it opens the door of another facade, you have young boy, as a as a
young man, as it will also mean mentioned, you know, who are going to the Western Community just to
marry and divorce. And that's why nowadays we hear about children being born, you know, out of that
marriage, you know, and they don't know who their parents are, say, yeah, so this is none other than
Zina when a person goes to a place just to marry, you know, for the secret of the divorce, marry,
and divorce. You know, this is Xena. And this is cheating and deception, which has no place in the
		
00:46:37 --> 00:47:03
			religion of Allah subhanho wa taala. It is not haram for a person to divorce, but at the first
place, he has to be honest. And this is Subhanallah, destroying the life of a person. Because they
were living at a time, which is totally different from the time of the companions of the Prophet
sallallahu sallam, you see the term of the companions of the Prophet, Allah. So if a girl or a woman
lost her family, somebody is going to take up, this is who they are, they don't leave
		
00:47:05 --> 00:47:33
			a goal, you know, wandering around without having somebody to take her under his custody, but women
living in this time nowadays, if a girl lost her husband, to find somebody to marry her after that,
sometimes it might be, you know, impossible for her, you know, she has to remain like this for the
rest of her life. Why is it? I mean, how can I legalize, you know, for somebody to go and marry her
knowing that he's going to divorce her after a few days, and then she has to go back to the family,
		
00:47:34 --> 00:48:15
			looking for somebody to take her but debris, and if she finds somebody, she has to compromise a lot,
she has to compromise a lot. So this is cheating, and deception, and also something which is not
acceptable. Islamically so they have to have the intention of staying. If in the future, something
happens and he wanted to divorce. It's okay. It's okay for him to divorce. Nobody says he has to
stay. Of course she doesn't want the marriage she can apply for the whole they get separated. And
that will be verified. Insha Allah shell. She's speaking about the Mahara itself as a condition for
the Nica Is it a condition or can the MaHA be delayed given later after the Nikka has been
		
00:48:16 --> 00:48:53
			completed? Because triplets in the Mahara mentioning the MaHA is a necessity in a marriage. It has
to be there. Whether he pays it now or he pays late later. It's okay according to whatever she
agrees with if she says she agrees with the marriage to be paid later, then it's okay for him to be
the MA later. But it has to be mentioned, either in the MMA or between him and the way that you're
going to pay this man which to go agrees it has to be mentioned. It is always better for him to make
some what they call commitment, pay some part of the model, and then later on, he can pay the rest
of the security.
		
00:48:56 --> 00:49:12
			The time of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam ala that sister who gave that companion who gave
herself to the Prophet salallahu Salam Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Mary how to somebody
else that person did not pay the Maori yet, but he's going to teach Quran in the future.
		
00:49:13 --> 00:49:50
			Now this means Matt Maher could be delayed because he didn't say teach her the Quran first and then
we make it as Mr. But he says, We agree that you will marry her but you teach her the Quran but the
teaching of the Quran will lead the MaHA saying the stipulation of the Mahara is what's necessary
but actually Mahara can be given later can be given later on, it is better for him to give some part
of it no matter how much small it is, yeah, then they will rationalize better for them also to
mention it during the awkward sort of people witness in the future, if there is a clash between them
that the matter is this and that, we have the witnesses, it can be included as part of the contract
		
00:49:50 --> 00:49:55
			itself should be actually if there is any written contract, it should be included. The matter is
this amount.
		
00:49:57 --> 00:49:59
			So the contract itself writes it should
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:30
			So it's not necessary that it has to be written, documented, but it could be something verbal as
well. In Islam in Islam, actually the second one, the verbal agreement, if he says, the words, and
other ones he's coupled to, that is should that is really does it? Yeah, marriage happens
Islamically this person can have relationship with the spouse can have children with her can see
with her, this is his wife, like any other wife on Earth. However,
		
00:50:31 --> 00:50:57
			if the government in the country where he lives required this documentation, the documentation is
not marriage at all, is just a recognition of the government. And they're doing it for wisdom, which
has wisdom behind it, it's good to have that kind of documentation, because we have people going
around with other sisters, you know, and they will think that these are the wives. So that
documentation is necessary to have the management documented.
		
00:50:58 --> 00:51:21
			And the government should make it very simple. For 12, people can find it very, very easy. But
unfortunately, almost all the countries you find marriage between a person and somebody who is not a
citizen, is a bit tough and difficult by the government, which is not supposed to be there. Because
it creates a lot of problems with the children who are going to be born between these
		
00:51:23 --> 00:51:36
			spouses, because if she's not a citizen, and he's a citizen, then when it comes to the restriction
of the marriage, sometimes the government will not agree with that money to be registered. Although
nowadays Alhamdulillah people started
		
00:51:37 --> 00:51:46
			redressing the matter, this door has been rectified and have the law on the law. So documentation of
the marriage is good,
		
00:51:47 --> 00:51:50
			is good. It has
		
00:51:51 --> 00:52:25
			wisdom behind it which it goes with the muscle, it goes with the muscle so a person shouldn't stay
away from from it. It's good for him actually two documents the marriage after, after it happens.
Yeah, but the actual marriage in Islam is what happens between the the Wali and that Guru and the
Mahara and shoot and as it eventually becomes a wife, whether they documents the marriage or not,
but she's, she's the wife. So we're seeing that the Wali can conduct the marriage himself. And we
don't need to ask for a shake to come in and give a
		
00:52:28 --> 00:53:09
			there is no need for that and studied for that. As far as this is concerned. There's no need for
that. These are just cultural practices. And it's okay also because people sometimes go to the
prophets, Allah Azza Minh, he will be the one who acts as the Willie. Yeah, so having a middleman as
a shear scholar and somebody to introduce the marriage and then the willie will give the, what he
called the hand of the daughter. That one is fine, verify. But in all circumstances, the Willie is
supposed to be the one who will say, I marry you might daughter and the groom will say accept an
offer. At the hotel for the new car. Dolly can do it by himself if he wants. Well, that's a
		
00:53:09 --> 00:53:22
			necessity. It's not necessary, but it's not good for a person to stay away from it. Rasulullah
sallallahu I used to teach them the hot button had stayin away from the Sunnah of the Prophet Allah
Azza is no good. It doesn't bring good at all.
		
00:53:23 --> 00:54:02
			is good for them to begin their marriage with this hotbed of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam in that
Hamdulillah I would want to stay in order. So what are we learning? And surely I'm fussing over Mr.
Yachty I'm Melina when you had the law firm with the law Oh my usual fella Haryana. Mashallah. Illa
illa Allahu Allahu la sharika washer on the Mohammed and Abdi who was who you are living in
political la caja quality you will have to move to lay low and to Muslim you another Taqwa community
halacha commonness in wider halacha Mina Xhosa over seminoma vigil and cathedral one is what talking
hola Lolita, Serena Viva la Hama in the LA carnality como la Kiva. Then find a subtle Hadith you
		
00:54:02 --> 00:54:40
			could have a low SML how do you how do you Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam or Shirley Morley
Martha to our color manifesting vida. We're cool with that in Valhalla are collaborating phenol,
then they will eat she just go ahead. Yeah, he might have some word to say but this hautbois
shouldn't be the first thing to be said in that marriage. Yeah. And last Maha Rotella insha Allah
will bless that Marisha it is always necessary that these type of agreement which part of our
existence, a person to let Allah smarter get involved from day one. That's why unnecessary and haram
things shouldn't be attached to the marriage.
		
00:54:41 --> 00:54:50
			Any I have no doubt in some of the clashes and the problems that are taking place in our marriages
in the future. They are related to this because we begin the marriage with the Massey
		
00:54:51 --> 00:54:59
			music and dancing and all of these inappropriate things that are taking place you know, at the end
of the day, we want Allah smarter to bless the marriage how
		
00:55:00 --> 00:55:11
			Yeah, how? Allah Allah Allah Allah Maria alas Mahabharata does whatever he wants and is the most
merciful but Allah said of a condition, you want him to get involved, you have to do the things in
the right way.
		
00:55:13 --> 00:55:23
			May Allah grant us good. I mean, I mean, check coming back to the point of the Mahara, who decides
the Mahara? Is it the bride herself? Or is it the Wali? The bride
		
00:55:25 --> 00:55:30
			is an absolute right of the bride. The father doesn't have any right.
		
00:55:31 --> 00:55:54
			She can stipulate whatever she wants. He she's the one who should be consulted. This is how many
there's a gift from the husband to her. And this is what legalize him enjoying that part of her body
in in the future. She's the one who will decide it doesn't make sense. That person take them out of
his daughter, and she's gonna go to that person. Why
		
00:55:55 --> 00:56:06
			Maha is her right. She does whatever she wants, she takes the MaHA she wants to pass it to the
parent is up to her. She will take it back to the husband is left while she want to give it to
anyone.
		
00:56:09 --> 00:56:48
			We mentioned about announcing the Nica so if you are inviting people for the Nicca or even the
walima later on usually you have a wedding cards that are sent out to the people would that be fine
specially as we see that a lot of the wedding cards they have Chronica or maybe I had this on them
so how do we navigate that? No we should we didn't card okay for person to send the court inviting
people. It's okay as part of the announcement also, it goes with the objective of the Sharia in
marriage, it announces the marriage more and the other thing is people should avoid writing it out
of the Quran because we already know in our houses sometimes we throw kids playing with and this is
		
00:56:48 --> 00:57:22
			Quran somebody is playing with this is absolutely unacceptable. So to avoid this is not to do so
let's if you're going to do the digital ones, digital ones because they don't exist it's just like
the Quran on your phones. This one doesn't exist unless if you invite it and you can just close it.
Yeah, that's it. So this one you can write whatever you want to write it's okay for you to write
because usually these ones are not disrespected person will just look and then close that page after
you close it. It doesn't exist by break my phone I will not see that Quran I will not see.
		
00:57:23 --> 00:57:49
			You get it contrary to the papers, that when I send the card that one remains, my kids are going to
play with it you know and sometimes also I might put it in a place which is not appropriate. And no
matter how much you try to say that people might not do it. No they do. You know you yourself also
if you look at your life, sometimes also you have these negatives. So the first place we shouldn't
put the ayat of the Quran
		
00:57:51 --> 00:58:01
			put some nasheet some poetry, some wisdom, you know, mentioned by some scholars, you know, that's
it, but not the ayat or the Sunnah of the prophets and love of cinema these two
		
00:58:03 --> 00:58:08
			things must be respected, must be respected, shall I
		
00:58:09 --> 00:58:56
			say coming to the more juicy are part of the conversation? Or what are the extra conditions that a
wife can stipulate in the Nica contract, only one condition which is which is to fear Allah subhanaw
taala in dealing with her in his responsibility and giving her her right he has to feel Allah
subhanaw taala this is the condition that I will advise any sister to stipulate that and to
emphasize and to focus on this so much. Any other condition, I will advise how to stay away from it.
marry somebody who feels Allah subhanaw taala and just act as a wife, who follows her Husband,
husband is living in Malaysia. Later he got a job in Saudi, he wanted to live go with him. He got a
		
00:58:56 --> 00:59:38
			job in another country, not the non Muslim countries. If it is the non Muslim country, she has to
resist, because teen in those places is very dangerous for her and the future family, then she can
resist, she can fight for this. So this kind of condition also couldn't be stipulated in the
marriage, although it is part of the fear of Allah subhanaw taala. If she says that and he fears
Allah, He will not do it. But if he's afraid of him doing this in the future, she can bring it out.
I will not go to a non Muslim country. We have to write this that the day you want to take me out of
this country. If it is not to a Muslim country to a non Muslim country, I will not agree to go and I
		
00:59:38 --> 00:59:59
			do have a right to stay wherever I want to stay. Yeah. And then in the future, if he wants to go to
that place, he doesn't feel Allah subhanho wa Taala then she does have a right to take him to the to
the court and the judge is going to give her the right for a separation if he's insistent. Other
than that, I don't advise any any other question to be stipulated
		
01:00:00 --> 01:00:37
			I cannot take me out of the place cannot do this kind of job cannot marry in the future cannot stay
in this, this and that all of these things bring tragedies in the future because what happens is the
husband because he's so blind, we're always like that, you know, in the marriage, I see nothing
except that woman. I just want to marry. Yeah, that's why whatever conditions she said, agree. Yeah,
just like the installation next, next next, I agree. Yeah. And then in the future, marriage is going
to become normal between us. When the marriage become normal, this is when that person will start
thinking about
		
01:00:38 --> 01:00:44
			those conditions and by agreement that he and the words he gave the wife in the future in the past
		
01:00:45 --> 01:01:08
			and then breaching the agreement will come and then issues. It is always like that as I that's why I
really don't advise anyone to have or to accept any condition other than the condition that last
mile Rotella mentioned in marriages taking care of the wife doing the right thing in taking care of
her feeling the last mile return and how these are the conditions that are supposed to be stipulated
other than that I advise
		
01:01:10 --> 01:01:17
			groom not to accept any other conditions because most likely you will not be able to fulfill them in
the future. Can
		
01:01:19 --> 01:01:36
			a woman stipulate that she will require a certain amount of stipend or an allowance every month or
something like having a separate place of her own these kinds of stipulations. Are they allowed?
Yeah, in terms of halal and haram? Yes.
		
01:01:37 --> 01:02:00
			And whatever is halal in Sharia she can request evaluated okay. Yeah. What is powerful how to
request is something which is impermissible Islamically. It is haram open how to request that or
state in a condition that amount to legalize in something that is haram in Islam or
		
01:02:02 --> 01:02:47
			making something haram which is halal Islamically these conditions are supposed to be rejected
because the Hadith of the prophets of Allah sama is very clear on this. When the prophets Allah
Allah cinema said, it says Kulu certain lesufi kitab Allah He for whom a bottle bottle bottle were
in Cana me at a sharp Kava Kava Allah who are shorter like when the Malala Illuminata. In the case
of the Allah, the Prophet, Allah Allah sama said, if there is a condition, even if this condition is
stipulated 100 times, but unfortunately, this condition violates any of the Sharia principles, the
prophets, Allah Azza wa said this condition is useless and invalid. It is like something that
		
01:02:47 --> 01:03:23
			doesn't exist. It says the condition there's the decision of Allah smart and the outcome of Allah
subhanaw taala is executed and has to be executed and is is on top of any other outcome. So these
type of conditions are not permissible for the wife or the husband actually to stipulate them. But
if there is anything that is halal, Islamically I want this amount of money every month, I want this
type of place, you know, and the husband agrees is okay, he has to keep those conditions intact. But
is it advisable for the wife to do that? Not Not at all?
		
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			Not at all. And I will advise anyone who approached me asking me should I accept these type of
conditions? I will tell him No, don't. Yeah, because No, I'm okay. I have the money to give. But how
do I know in the future, whether it will be able to do it at all? And the moment I am not able she
might not understand and clashes and problem will start to happen. And also add to that Marian a
person who showed you from day one that we are with you as long as this money is then what kind of
marriage is this and who are you looking for? You know, as soon as Allah Allah Salama says alikhan
Bill Akari for Inola one one Taqwa Harmon, what are the BDC he says when you marry, marry, big a
		
01:04:11 --> 01:04:24
			virgin, girl, young girl, is if I know now about one because when they speak, their speech is fresh.
Fresh means they don't say bad things a lot. You know.
		
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			They talk moderately in a nice way.
		
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			Somebody that you can sit down with them and make a plan. You know, it's like the brain is empty.
You feed it with whatever you you want. So the prophets Allah Allah Surma said, You marry the Virgin
person, she has this shyness. She talked appropriately. You know, I don't know nowadays whether we
have a Shall I said have been the law as it says for another 401 Takahama. And also the womb is
clean because she never had lationship with somebody. So the womb is clean.
		
01:05:00 --> 01:05:18
			That's better for the plantation of, of a child. What are the billion C's. And these are the one
that usually agree to stay with you with the little you have, you know, you don't have that much of
salary, but they don't mind. The point is they have something to eat and survive.
		
01:05:19 --> 01:05:32
			But this guy's mad in a person who set up a condition from the beginning and she showed him that she
stayed with him because of the dunya. I will tell you, honestly speaking, this person did not do the
correct search for the first place.
		
01:05:33 --> 01:06:12
			did not do the correct search in the first place is good for a person to marry a woman that is
moderate, and that is willing to live with him according to his ability and capability whatever he
has, she will just restrict herself to to that without looking for something as such, if she is to
ask for this salary to be given to her every month, part of his salary should be given to her every
month, I will advise him not to accept this condition is better for him to look for another medical
person rather than going with this because he doesn't know in the future, whether she will I mean,
he will be able to continue or not.
		
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			Check building on the conditions of permissibility and impermissibility.
		
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			Many people would also use the incident that happened between the prophets of salaam Ali and Fatima
of adding a condition to the contract of not getting a second wife. What would you
		
01:06:33 --> 01:06:39
			I don't know where they get this because to my knowledge or skill So Laurie cinema did not have this
		
01:06:40 --> 01:07:12
			condition with Alexander Vitali. Otherwise I don't think I live in Italy who would think of marrying
somebody after telling the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam I not? I will not do I don't know not
not as a condition. But the incident that happened where he mentioned about angering Fatima and what
angers her anger is the prophets are seldom and there was an indication of not taking a second wife.
There was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam did not have this stipulated in the marriage in the
marriage. I live in Abu Talib.
		
01:07:13 --> 01:07:32
			He should know that you cannot marry a second wife. I've never come across a place where this is
mentioned. But when Oliveira Vitaly decided to marry the second wife and also the second wife is the
daughter of Abuja to get it, so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam out of his love for alumina,
Vitaly
		
01:07:33 --> 01:08:02
			and he knows that this is going to harm Ali inevitably. Why? Because Shanti mas anger will make the
prophets Allah some are upset, however upset the Prophet sallallahu Sallam is gonna affect that
person who is upsetting him. So that's why Rasulullah sallallahu cinema told him no, this person
promised me and he's referring to our laws, you know, never break his promise. And he's told him
letters to me when I tried to Allah might have been
		
01:08:04 --> 01:08:19
			Have you like as Rasulullah. So he says, the daughter of the doula cannot be combined in one place
with the daughter of the Prophet of Allah subhanho wa taala. There is a reason why the prophets
Allah was telling him this, this is to protect him.
		
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			Not because the marriage is not permissible he himself he did. And almost all the companions of the
Prophet allows them also had second wife. But this is just a special case that if Ali is to go and
marry, it might harm him because Fatima might get upset because of some of the things that will
happen. And the prophets, Allah server may get upset because of that which will harm Ali, even
though I'm Italian, so it is not.
		
01:08:47 --> 01:09:24
			I mean, it's not supposed to be used as a reason why people reject the second second marriage, the
last one to legalize it, and it will remain illegal until the Day of Judgment. Check. But for the
sake of the argument, let's say that a person stipulated this in the Nikka contract, and it's
something permissible, so the person agreed the groom agreed to stay away from what's permissible.
It's now stipulated in the Nikka contract, what did we find out? It depends on who a person is
following because you know, most of the scholars disagree with these type of conditions to be
stipulated because they see them as something which is
		
01:09:25 --> 01:09:30
			making haram that which Allah's Mattila made Allah, we're not making it haram. We're just staying
away.
		
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			Those people who agreed with the conditions will say they're not making it haram. But those the
majority of the scholars will say no, because what does it mean if you tell him you are not allowed
to to marry? Yeah, don't make an attempt to everyone but to this person what I do, you're making it
haram upon him to use it. That's how they say it. And this is correct way of thinking that if you
tell them you are not allowed to do it, what does that mean?
		
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			It is haram
		
01:10:00 --> 01:10:00
			upon him to
		
01:10:02 --> 01:10:29
			or they call it is haram upon him to to marry the second wife and Allah subhanaw taala make it
legal. So that's why they said, these type of conditions are not permissible, this opinion of the
vast majority of the scholars at the first place. And as such, the husband is allowed to violate
them in the future whenever he wants and the wife doesn't have a right to destroy the marriage and
go and marry somebody else this opinion of the vast majority of the scholars in however, as I said,
		
01:10:31 --> 01:10:58
			I don't think doesn't the violation go against the first I also reminder, Alphaville ACOTA, right.
Yes, yeah, that's what those people might say. But the majority of the scholars will tell you that
the prophets Allah, Allah selama said, you can go ahead and set up any condition you want. But you
are not allowed to mention any condition that goes against the Sharia of Allah subhanaw taala. If
Allah says yes and no condition to say, no, that condition is useless. This is what they are saying.
		
01:10:59 --> 01:11:40
			That Sharia recognizes the one that doesn't violate the Sharia of Allah subhanho wa taala. So they
see this occurred. So they see this condition as something that violates the Sharia of Allah
subhanaw taala. And as such, they disagree with this condition to be to be stipulated at the first
place. But as I said earlier aside, I don't see any justification for somebody to accept conditions
like this at the first place. Yeah, because this is a deception, honestly, speaking, is deception.
Because the wife is agreeing to stay with him, because he gave her his word that he will not marry
again. Why do I need to go with this? How many sisters you have on Earth,
		
01:11:41 --> 01:12:21
			millions of them who did not marry? Why only this one, she said, she doesn't want to stay with you
if you have another wife. And this is her choice Islamically. It is not watchable for her to marry
somebody who has another wife. And it is not watching upon her to accept to stay with somebody who
has a wife, it is an absolute freedom of choice, you know, for her to choose the person that she
wants to be whether he has a wife, or he doesn't have a wife, so I'm not allowed to force her to do
it. So if she tells me that I can only agree with you to be my husband, if you agree with this, why
would I agree with this? If I know that in the future, I'm going to marry another person, why she's
		
01:12:21 --> 01:12:58
			giving me permission to approach her to touch her because of me agreeing with this condition. At the
first place? Why would I agree with this, you know, that's absolutely cheating. You know, cheating
or not being honest with the with the wife at the first place, they get either whether we accept the
opinion of the vast majority of the scholars or we don't agree with them, or we accept the other
one. But let's do a look at what he called the condition itself from the root. Is it okay for a
person to accept it, I really, really, really see it as something which is not appropriate for a
person to accept those conditions in the first place. If she doesn't agree, just let her go.
		
01:13:00 --> 01:13:40
			Tell the family, it's straightforward that I don't agree with this condition. Even if he knows in
the future, he is not having an intention to marry. I always advise a person not to agree with this
type of conditions. Because I have seen people who will tell you, we will never marry but then after
a few days, you see him marrying the second or third wife, but he was the one who was saying in the
past, I will never marry I respect my wife. I don't know, I don't want to see her been upset. But
now what happened? What changed? You know, they still marriage. So that's why even if he has the
intention of not to marry in the future, it is not good for him to accept these type of conditions.
		
01:13:40 --> 01:13:48
			He just when he called tell them, I don't want to agree with this. Either they cancel it. Or they
		
01:13:49 --> 01:13:54
			tell him we apologize, we decline? Then he goes look for somebody else that is 100% Better for you.
		
01:13:56 --> 01:14:19
			Jake, do you have any other advices for this period, where the * is happening? In what sense?
Before we move forward to the walima and other paths or for the spirit of Nikka any other advices or
suggestions that you would like to before we close very simple, not scary, you know cultures as long
as they're not by violating the Sharia. They are okay but make it very simple.
		
01:14:20 --> 01:14:22
			And this and that. And then what follows is
		
01:14:24 --> 01:14:36
			the rest of the marriage activities. Yeah, that's that's it. So, any other thing I will say as I
said, we have already covered those conditions and
		
01:14:37 --> 01:14:46
			the possible you know, condition that a person might stipulate in the marriage we have already
talked about that. So my general advice is to make the marriage very simple
		
01:14:47 --> 01:14:59
			channel that is akmola Handshake for joining us for part one, we'll be taking a quick break, and
then we'll be back for part two Inshallah, where we are going to be discussing about the walima
WhatsApp
		
01:15:00 --> 01:15:11
			builds during the walima and the period after that that leads to the rest of the marriage this to
all the viewers for tuning in See you in the next session Salaam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh