Is it love

Yasmin Mogahed

Channel: Yasmin Mogahed

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Understanding the difference between unhealthy attachments and pure love

Episode Transcript

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I was going to show one of regimes smilla rahmanir rahim wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah while earlier savage main rubbish reckless Saudi. Well, you certainly agree with him in this any of the holy and this is a very, very often misunderstood topic and extremely important topic. Now, before I get too deep into the definitions of what I term as unhealthy attachments, the reason why I say unhealthy attachments is that in psychology right now, in a lot of the research, they talk about attachments and so attachments aren't necessarily in the body of research and in the lexicon of psychology isn't necessarily a bad thing. But the way that I'm using it, it is a negative thing and

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that's why I'm going to call them unhealthy attachments. And then the the, the the definitions of love, true love, but you know, we'll we'll use that terminology for that and before I get too much into that terminology, I want to talk a little bit briefly Of course, because this is this is all a very accelerated course I would say is briefly about the nature of the heart. So the heart in in the Quran is referred to as cleanse and there are other words that Allah subhanaw taala uses, like salted it, which is the chest which which is around the heart for Ed so there are other words, but the the the heart itself is referred to as fun and club actually comes from the root word in Arabic

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That means to turn and the reason for that is that the heart by nature is something that turns it's something that can easily turn one way or the other. This is why the prophets I send them use the Ask yam will call live Alka lube sub bit calbee Allah denecke Oh Turner of that which turns which is the heart, keep my heart firm on your dean or your way. And and we know that, that we should never become complacent even about our men, because there's a there's a there's a narration that tells us that a person can wake up in the morning as a believer, and by the evening they're a disbeliever. And a person can, you know, be

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you know, a wake up as a as a disbeliever. And by the evening, or rather the other way around, go to sleep as a disbeliever wake up as a believer or vice versa that that this turning of of the heart is something that can happen very rapidly, where one part of the day you're a believer by the end of the day you're a disbeliever may have less power to protect us. So the heart is is essential that we take care of it it's essential that we protect it. Now why is the heart so important? The prophets lie Selim said in a in a longer head deep at the end of the Hadith after talking about how Rahman Helen and look the shabby heads, which are the doubtful matters, the prophets I send them goes on to

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say in FL just as the motiva either solo had Sahaja Sudoku, what is the first factor that says that just kulu Allah will he'll call indeed, in the body, there's a lump of flesh, and if that lump of flesh is set, right, then the entire body will be set, right? And if that lump of flesh is corrupted, then verily the entire body will be corrupted. And and Ella, verily, it is the heart. So here we learn that, you know, a lot of people believe are under are, are under the impression that their mind is in control. Right? Like, you know, there's this idea of like, no, my mind controls my heart, right. But in fact, if you look spiritually, and if you look in the text, it is the heart

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that controls everything. It is the heart that controls the body, and it is the heart that controls the mind. What does that mean? It means that the type of heart that you have, if you have a healthy heart is a solid, if it is set right? Then the entire body becomes set, right so if you if you're a person who has a healthy heart, then the rest of your actions will follow as generally healthy. If you have a parent if you're a person who has an unhealthy heart will either fester that if there's a sad in that heart, if there's corruption in that heart, and we know that there are two types of unhealthy hearts that we're that we're talking about. One is the heart that is that is sick, it has

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sickness in it, but it has some life still it it's some health in it still. And then at the other extreme, and the most extreme is a dead heart. These are hearts that the Prophet Allah subhanaw taala describes in the Quran are so hard that there he compares them to rocks. And then he says, This isn't sort of a bucket or I should do password or they're even more hard than rocks. Why? Because a rock

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can at least be split open, right? You know, it can crack. Whereas these dead hearts that are so hardened, they cannot even be opened at all. And so they're even harder. They're even more you know dead than a than a stone than a rock. And then we have the healthy heart. Now the healthy heart as the prophets I said I'm talking about here, the solo heart This is a heart that has been rectified has been that there has been effort put in to take care of this heart, there has been effort put into cleaning that heart to purify that heart, and then to protect that heart. These are you know, and these are essential

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ingredients that are necessary for a heart to remain to become healthy and to remain healthy. A healthy heart is referred to in the end as

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a lemon as a lot of you have been selling. So the healthy heart is referred to in the Quran as Alban Selim a sound heart, and this is

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in the Quran on the tongue of Ibrahim and he sent him there's this beautiful extended law, in which Ibrahim alayhis salam calls out to Allah subhanaw taala and he says, well at Zinio, may you buy food and do not disgrace me on the day when everyone is brought back, you know, my lion foul man whenever noon 11 at the La Habra, Calvin Selim, the day when nothing will benefit anyone have wealth, nothing of wealth or children, nothing is going to benefit them. They and for men and women who own wealth and children, in their men, Ethel law, habit Kanban selling except for the one who returns back to a loss of panel data with a heart that is selling with a heart that is healthy, with a heart that is

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sound with a heart that is is alive and healthy. And so what do we learn from from these various narrations and this is, of course, a summary, what we learn is that number one, the heart is the master of the body, the heart controls the rest of the individual The heart is what is the is the, the master or the or the powerhouse. And it then affects the rest of that human being. And, and and then we can go on as as far as to say that the heart, if the heart is sick, then the rest of that human being will be sick. And then the rest of that humans actions will be sick, and then the effects on society will be sickness. And so we find that it's essential to work on the heart,

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because the heart is that part that controls the rest of the human being. And then eventually, obviously, the society and the relationships etc. We also learn that, that the only thing that's going to benefit us on the Day of Judgment is if we have a healthy heart, if we do not everything else that we have collected and everything else that we've amassed, you know, as Allah says,

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They unfollow men and women in them, and then nothing will benefit them of wealth or children. These are the types of things and especially in the society, that

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of the prophets, I send them. These were

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symbols of power, right? If you had wealth, and you had children, these were these this is basically what was was a meant that that person was powerful. And so Allah Subhana, Allah is telling us here, that none of that will benefit anyone. The only thing that will matter is whether or not you return back to Allah with a heart that's healthy with a heart that sound. Now let me move in to what does that heart look like? What is what is called one Saleem, and how can we understand what what are the the characteristics of that type of heart? Well, one way to understand polybutadiene is to understand it as a heart that does not have any competitor with a law within it. A heart that does

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not have any competitor with a law within it. Now I say this because sometimes people get confused. You know, if you say for example,

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you know, nobody has my nobody is in my heart, but a lot. If you say something like that, you know, people can become very confused. And they start to ask like, Well, wait a minute, does that mean I'm not allowed to love my children? Does that mean I'm not allowed to love my husband, my parents and and I don't want there to be any confusion. And so why the reason that I want to put it this way so that we understand it's not about love of other things. It's not about loving our parents, loving our children, loving our spouse. It's about is this love a competitor with the love of God? Does this love become a common arrival with the love of Allah subhanaw taala within the heart and alosa

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panel that Allah talks about this in sort of the Bukhara when he says

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Women a nassima, Duckie woman, dooney laggy. And then you have buena hunka abunda, that there are human beings there are people who take rivals with a lot and that means a rival with Allah subhanaw taala. Now how is it that they're taking this rival with Allah subhanaw taala. Usually when we think about rival with Allah, we think about ship. And when we think about ship, we typically think about a, like a stone statue, an idol, a stone made of stone, that we worship, right. But here Allah subhanaw taala is clarifying, that this and that this, that these undead is plural, these idols, these rivals with Allah subhanaw taala are actually in love your Hebrew now whom Kapha Billa Allah

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says that they love them, as they should only love God. So there are people who take rivals with Allah, they love them as they should only love Allah or God. So the rivalry here, this competition within the heart is a competition of love. And that is what Allah subhanaw taala is describing here in this area. And then he goes on to say that when levena Mmm, I should do a bender lead. This is very important as I was describing the believers, as being those who their strongest, most intense love is for a law. This is absolutely the basis and foundation of everything we're going to talk about, of every single thing we're going to talk about here today. And that is when we talk about

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love. When we talk about false attachments or unhealthy attachments, it has to be understood that the shed do hope that the most intense love has to be for Allah subhanaw taala and only when our most intense love is for Allah Subhana Allah will we have the capacity to love the creation in a healthy way, this is probably the take home message if there's anything that we take home from our time today. It's this, that only when we only when we make a law, our most intense love only when our love for Allah subhanaw taala supersedes and, and and

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you know, it takes all it, it overcomes and it is superior to any other love, only then will we have the capacity to love the creation in a healthy, beautiful way. And I'll talk about what it looks like when it is not healthy. And how that actually becomes harmful. Not only for the individual who harbors that, that, that that competing love, but it also becomes harmful to the object of love. So you actually hurt the one that you love in an unhealthy way as well as yourself right when the foundation is not Allah subhanaw taala when the greatest love in the heart is not almost a penalty. However,

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it is not only a heart that has its greatest love for almost kind of that. But again, we mentioned that Alban selling is a heart that does not have any competitor with Allah subhanaw taala. So a competitor can be in other things as well. We might say, I love Allah Most. And it might be true, maybe our greatest love is for a loss of power beyond anything else. But we might fear something else as we should only fear Allah, we might put our dependence on something else as we should only put our dependence on Allah subhanaw taala, we might put our hope in something else, as we should only put our hope in Allah subhanaw taala. So this is a much deeper and vast statement than only

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about the love now I began with love. Because there's another principle that we can understand about love, and that is that whatever you love most becomes your master. Okay, so if you want to know what you are a slave to, and by the way, let's clarify everyone is a slave to something. Everyone is a slave to something. The atheist is a slave just as the agnostic just as the the Christian, the Jew, the Buddhists, and the Hindu, every individual is a slave to something. The only difference is that different people enslave themselves to different things. Okay, and I'll talk about some of the things that we enslave ourselves to when talking about false attachments. But but generally this

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principle is that whatever you love most becomes your master so you become a slave to whatever it is that you love. Most.

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Now

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when we look

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Now at the concept of, of having our greatest love for Allah subhanaw taala, our greatest hope and Allah subhanaw taala our greatest dependence on a loss of data, let's take a look at what the false attachments look like or what happens when we have these false attachments. So, I want you to think about the heart, like a vessel. Alright, so like a like a cup, and it can hold, it holds like a certain amount of stuff, right. And I want you to think about the heart as having various layers. All right, now I want to talk specifically right now about the core of the heart. Now I want you to think about the core of the heart. This is the lobe, right, the lobe which is the most inner most

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part of the client, now the look or the most innermost part of the client, that is what we will explain as the seat of worship. Whatever is in the innermost core of the heart, is your ILA. And now I've just given another very important term, you've heard this word before, you probably say it many times a day, in the shower head, you say lair. ilaha illAllah. Now, when you're saying that ilaha illa Allah, you're saying a very, very profound statement, and a lot of us don't actually understand the implications and the depth of the statement. Literally, when you're saying that ilaha illa Allah, you are saying, there is nothing worthy of being an elf. Except for Allah. That's what you've

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said. You've said, there is no ILA, there is nothing worthy of being any left, except for God, except for Allah subhanaw taala. Now we have to talk about the meaning of Allah, what is an elf? When we say there's nothing else that can be any left? But God, what are we really saying? A laugh.

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Ella, is not only that thing you pray to Eli is also that which you put at the core of your heart, Eli, is what you put at the, at the core of your hunt.

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Therefore,

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your money can be any of that. And for many people, money isn't enough. Money is something that they put at the core of their hearts, they love it more than any other thing. They fear losing it more than any other thing, they put their dependence on it more than any other thing, they put their hope in it more than any other thing. And that makes it an elf. It's actually as if they're worshiping their money. And that thing that you put at the core of your heart, as I mentioned, you become a slave to it. And so such people who, who I describe as their greatest love is for money, their greatest hope is in money, their greatest dependence is in money, the greatest fear is of losing

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money, they become slaves to money. And that is the reason why you'll find that there are people out there who will do anything for money. That's because they become slaves to it, whatever will give them money, they'll do it. And it doesn't matter if it involves killing, it doesn't matter if it involves stealing, it doesn't matter if it involves going and occupying other countries bombing and, and and raping, that this is because it becomes a master for these people. It is in an odd you become a slave to it. And that's because you've put it at the core of your heart. And you will find that when any, anytime someone puts an electrode in the core of their heart, other than Allah

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subhanaw taala.

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That person will by definition, listen carefully, that person will by definition, act on justly. So anytime a murderer repeat that because it's very important. Anytime a person puts something at the core of their heart, other than God, that person will by definition, act unjustly. And that is because the heart becomes corrupted when it is filled at the core with other than Allah subhanaw taala. Now again, I'm speaking about the core, because it doesn't mean that we cannot love other things. It means that the core which is saved for worship, which is saved for your ILA can only be for God. And if anything else is put there. It will cause destruction in that heart and it will

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cause oppression in the app.

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Have that individual. Now I'll give you another example. A person who has power at the core of their heart will act unjustly because they will do anything for power. A person who has another individual, another human being, at the core of their heart will act unjustly. And let me give you an example of that. This is something that a lot of, especially as women, we are often not taught that there is a right and a wrong way to love people. A person can be at the core of your heart. And that person can be a competitor with a loss of data. For example, and this is the first one I'm going to begin with, because this becomes one of the greatest trials, especially for women. And that

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is our own children. When a woman becomes a mother or a man becomes a father, that child becomes one of the greatest tests for that human being. And that is why if you look in the hood, and a lot of panels either list two things as being a great test or a fitna, and that is wealth and children. And we also find that, that Ibrahim alayhis salam, what was he tested in, he was tested in his in his child in his son. So we find that actually one of the greatest tests for a mother or a parent generally, is their own child. And unfortunately, we live in a society. And I'll say that this is very much emphasized in certain cultures, especially is that as soon as you have a child, especially

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a woman, when a woman has a child, all of a sudden, there is the internal withdrawal, right, which already is extreme rahama extreme mercy for that child, it's the greatest show of mercy we have on this earth, right then Allah subhanaw taala is the source of that mercy. But this is the mercy that Allah subhanaw taala describes in the Hadith, that the mercy of the mother for her child, that Allah soprano, that is the source of that mercy, and Allah's mercy is greater than a mother for her child. But this is the the greatest, a deepest form of of human mercy, right. And so that mercy already makes that the test of our children there, right, because there's already that fifth row, but then

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you add to that there's a, there's a lot of cultural teachings as well, where there's this idea that as soon as you have a child, as soon as you become a mother, you are now nothing else, right, or nothing else really matters quite as much that the rest of your identity kind of falls away, because now you're a mother. And now, we're almost taught to take our children and, and, and, and, culturally, it's typically take our son, right, if we have a son, and and there's this, there's this idea that we take our son, and we put him at the center of our existence, and then we start to revolve our life around that child, right, everything becomes about that boy, typically, it's

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typically with our, with our sons, and this is, of course, much more so in, in, in some cultures more than others, but we see this, this, this very unhealthy attachment to our sons or our children generally. And, and that is something that causes a lot of problems. Now, I mentioned that when you put something else at the core of your heart, other than Allah subhanaw taala, two things will happen. One is that you damage your own heart. And the second is that you actually cause harm to the object itself. So you actually doing two types of harm, harm to your own self to your own heart, and then also harm to that other individual. Now, in this case, I want you to think about the heart. As

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I said, it's a vessel now imagine that you think of the heart like a guest take, alright, so I use this example in my class, where if you take your car to the gas station, and now you decide, okay, I'm empty, and so I need to fill up with gas, right? Some people call it petrol, or whatever you want to call it, the thing you put in your gas tank, right? So you go there and you realize that day that gas is super expensive. And so you know, orange juice is on sale. So you decide, okay, I'm going to take the orange juice, and I'm going to put that in my gas tank instead of the instead of the gas. Now what happens? Well, you've just put orange juice in a vessel that was only created to

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hold gasoline, right? This vessel this, this creation, right? This is a creation this, we you know, the manufacturer made this car right. So you

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You've just taken this vessel that was manufactured to only hold gasoline, and you've put orange juice in it. Now you tell me what happens to that car? Well, that car's broken. Now you've destroyed the car and you've destroyed the gas tank. This is exactly what happens to us, when we put other than Allah subhanaw taala in the gas tank of our hearts, when we put our children in the core of our hearts when we put our money, when we put power, when we put image, or status, or what other people think, let me let me talk a little bit about what that looks like. When we worship other people's opinions. What does that look like? Well, when when I have in the core of my heart, the most

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important thing to me is that I appear a certain way to other people, that that the most important thing to me is how other people view me how other people view me and my family and my children. And then I essentially become obsessed with my image. Right. And now we have, of course, social media, which is a platform to, to sort of, to sort of like put that image on display, of course, the the Photoshop version, right? Like we have, we have a Photoshop version of our lives that we put out there, we have a photoshopped version, a filtered version of our marriage, or of our children or of our lives, right, we want to, to get a specific type of image across. And of course, that images

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that were perfect, our children are perfect, or relationships are perfect. Our husband is our marriage is perfect. Our life is perfect, right? We're having lots and lots of fun, we're very productive right now that we're on lockdown, different, you know that we have certain images that we want to portray, you know, and there's this filtered version that we put out there Why? Oftentimes, it's because we're very, very concerned about our image. We're very concerned about what people think about what people will say about us. This is so deep, that sometimes a person will actually subject themselves listen to this, some people will actually subject themselves and their own

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children to abuse just so that other people won't say they got divorce. Listen to that carefully, that that we're so obsessed that we worship other people's opinions of us, that we worship what other people think so much that we are willing to stay even in an abusive relationship, just so that people will not say she got divorced, or he got divorced, or my daughter got divorced. And I have cases from all over the world of this type of thing, where even if a woman is abused, she will even go to her family and her own family will tell her have sobotta sister, right. And by the way, sobor does not mean allowing yourself to be abused. Subbu does not mean being passive. Subbu does not mean

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you slapped me on this cheek, I turned my cheek so you can more easily slap me on this cheek. That's not the meaning of sublime. And we have for too long abused the concept of sub, to keep people victimized, to keep people down. That's not what Allah and His Messenger have taught us, we are abusing the religion, and we're doing it to control people. And to control the image that we want to portray to others. We need to stop doing that. But that happens when we worship the opinion of others when we literally worship our image I have to appear to be the perfect family I have to be up here to be the perfect wife and the perfect mother. And and and and I even have to have the perfect

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skin right? And if I don't you have a filter, you know to make it look perfect. You know, we live in a world of photoshopping everything right? You see images of people on magazines, that's not really what they look like, because they're Photoshop, everything is Photoshop. And unfortunately, we live in a very Instragram you know, type of world where everything is about how you appear and you have to appear perfect, you have to be perfect, and you have to look perfect. And you have to keep up this facade of being perfect. Now the problem here is that you've made your your focal point something other than a law, you're you're worshipping your image, you're worshiping the opinion of

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others. And when you do that you are oppressing yourself, and then you are oppressing others and this is exactly what I want us to understand that when we put something else at the core of our heart These are called unhealthy attachments. When we put something else at the core of our heart other than Allah and we worship it. And we love it as we should only love a lot. Sometimes this is fashion. You know what I mean? Like some of us

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We might worship fashion, like fashion says, Okay, now it's in fashion to dress like this. So we hear and we obey, then fashion tomorrow changes and says, Well, actually, we changed our mind. Now fashion is saying this, that we have to wear this. And then we just go along, we hear and we obey, it's like we're work, we're slaves to fashion. And if it's something that is completely inappropriate, or it's something that goes against the Quran, and the Sunnah, but we follow it because we're worshipping fashion, again, because we've made fashion at the, at the core of our hearts and looking a certain way. And sometimes, what we can do is that when we are so worried about

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how we appear, it can become a competitor with the commands of Allah subhanaw taala. And I'll give you a few examples when when money is at the core of the heart. And then on the one hand, you have this opportunity to get more money using rubber, or getting involved in rubber, or selling alcohol, right. So now you have this opportunity to get more money, right. But it involves something that is forbidden. And then you have on this hand, a lot of content that is saying, but it's forbidden, right? Maybe we love the image of having a really giant house. So everyone can look at our house and say, Wow, look at that, or we want the brand new car that we can't afford. But we want people to say

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wow, you know, like that's, that's a really nice, that's a sweet ride, ya know, and we don't have the money for it. But there's this, but there's opportunity to do it with Reba. So now we're faced with a choice, right? On the one hand, Allah subhanaw taala has spoken about river in the Quran in a way he has spoken about nothing else. He has said that the people who do not give up river is an OB Harbin min Allahu wa rasuluh let them prepare for a war waged against them by God in His Messenger. That is really strong terminology. And yet we so easily involve ourselves in Libba. Why? Because we worship what people think because we worship image, we worship status symbols, and that becomes even

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more important than the commandment of Allah subhanaw taala. And so in essence, we start to see what is it really at the core of our hearts? Is it a law, if it is a law than when a law makes a command, we are told in the end, that the people who really have a love there, at the core of their hearts when a command is made, Samantha will find that we hear and we obey, right? But if we have something else there, we're not able to hear the command of Allah, and we hear and we obey. And we see this in something else as well. And sometimes that happens with hijab is that we live in a society that's all about look a certain way, you know, look, your best appearances, appearances, appearances,

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right, this Instagram culture, where everything is about how you look right how you appear. And so we start to almost worship that we start to make that our focal point, right. And now, when our appearance becomes our focal point, when it becomes our obsession, when it becomes one of the most important things to us. And then a law comes and says, cover it up, it becomes a struggle, it becomes very difficult. And a lot of that has to do internally with what is at our core, what is most important to us, is it being beautiful to society, or is it being beautiful to Allah subhanaw taala right. So we find that when we have something else at the core, when we put orange juice in

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the gas tank, we are not able to, as I said, you know be just we are not able to, to love Allah and obey Allah as we are commanded to love Him and OBEY Him. We are not able to fear Allah as we were told to fear him, because something else is there and there isn't space for Allah subhanaw taala and his commandments. The other thing that happens is this. And this is something that leads me to the concept of, of loving in the right way. And how when we don't love in the right way, when we have other things at our core, it shatters the heart. When you put orange juice in the gas tank, you are destroying that car you are destroying that tank. Similarly when we have put other things at our

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core, we shatter our own hearts we break the human being. That is actually the reason at a core level. Why a human being breaks. Don't think that it's hardships that break a human being. hardships don't break a human being. What breaks a human being is loving anything as you should only love Allah fearing anything as you should only fear Allah putting your hope and trust in anything as you should only put your hope and trust in Allah

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Depending on anything, as you should only depend on a law, that is what breaks the human being. That is what breaks the heart of the human being. That's what breaks the psyche of the human being. It is not our hardships, because Allah Subhana Allah, if Allah holds you up, if a law is at your core, if a person has a healthy heart, and Allah will enable that person to with withstand the hardest of afflictions, that Allah subhanaw taala will hold that person up. And I have met individuals who have been through calamities and afflictions that would make your hair grow whites, and yet they were able to get through it and not just survive, but thrive inside of it, to be able to grow stronger in

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it to be able to still live and live it, you know, thriving. And that can only happen when a law is at the court. And when a law is at the court. That heart becomes like something amazing, right? That heart becomes so resilient, that it can withstand the fire of life, the storms of life, you know, I use this analogy of the sequoias. This is like these sequoias. This is a type of tree, which is so resilient, that it's almost like like fireproof, like, it's resilient, it's resistant to fire. And I was just like, amazed when I found out that last month that I had created the Sequoia like that right? And I realized that the heart of the believer can be like a Sequoia that the heart of the

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believer can actually be

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resistant to fire. Now that doesn't mean that we don't feel pain. It doesn't mean we don't feel sadness. In fact, these are normal human emotions are things that that prophets felt right sadness. We know that jacobellis lm felt we know that the prophets I send them had the year of sadness, this is normal, but I'm not talking about normal emotion. I'm talking about being broken. I'm saying that know that the heart that is healthy. Paul Boone Saleem, a heart that has a loss of Dallas supreme inside of it will be able to withstand the most harshest of fires, the most harshest of storms in this life. Because Allah subhanaw taala is that person's strength, a law holds that person up. And

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if a law holds someone up, then that person can never fall, that person will not. And when I say can never fall in what I want to, again, clarify, it doesn't mean that person doesn't falter, it doesn't mean that person becomes perfect. It doesn't mean that person will not commit sins. That's not what I mean. I mean, that person will not be destroyed, that person may fall and that person may cry, and that person will go through pain, and that person will go through fear, perhaps, but that person will not become broken and destroyed. Because Allah subhanaw taala will hold that person up, and will allow that person to withstand the fire of their hardships. And now and inshallah I'll wrap it

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up with this, that fire that that person goes through, actually ends up purifying that person actually ends up strengthening that person rather than destroying that person. And that is absolutely amazing. This is what Allah subhanaw taala talks about. In the end, when he says Lima has Allahu levena mn o that Allah subhanaw taala says that he sends afflictions and the reason one of the reasons he sends afflictions, is in order to purify from haste purify those who believe. And when you talk about this word, some haze it's literally the same word that's used for the the the the burning or the heating of gold. And when you heat up gold, you remove the impurities from gold

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from haze, it's a process that gold goes through to become pure, right? And Allah puts the hearts of believers, Allah puts believers through that same process of purification and thumb haze, but it involves that fire. It involves the fire of affliction. But and here again, here's the difference. Here's the difference. When a heart is sending when a heart is healthy, when a heart has no hate inside of it, when a heart Has A Love Supreme, not their money, not their power, not their image, not what other people think not you know fashion or society's standards, not their culture. A lot of people worship their culture, their culture is at the core of their heart. You know, a lion is

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messenger can say one thing a culture says another we hear and we obey our culture, right? Our forefathers, right but our forefathers did it like this, just like what I said, right? But our forefathers did it this way. And so, when a heart is is has a lot at the center has a lot at the core rather than these other things. Not another person, you know, even if it's your own child, even if it's your own spouse, the there's a healthy and an unhealthy way to love and the only

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Way to love in a healthy way is to have a lot at the core. And then we can love in a healthy way. And so if a heart has a lot at the core, and has no competitor with Allah subhanaw taala at its core, then that heart when it goes through afflictions instead of being destroyed, it becomes strengthened. It becomes purified. Holy, Holy Heather. What's the hora lolly welcome in number four Rahim subhanak Elohim that shadow and that Illa Illa and stuff are required to relate