Channel: Musleh Khan
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Okay guys, so then why do you want to lower your body care to everyone? This millennial recommendable Rahim Al hamdu, lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah he sallallahu alayhi wa ala early, he was Herbie here to Marion logmar eliminare be million foreigner when foreigner be married and 10 I was in Armenia carrying on, I'll be sure you suddenly with many of the terminally Sonia qualities on them buried. So one of the things that I wanted to talk about today, and hopefully allow all of us to think about and reflect on is just engaging teenagers, and in particular during this whole isolation period. And it seems like this isolation period is going
to go on for some time. And that could be like the worst catastrophic news, especially for teenagers. Why? Because they're so used to, to being engaged and being connected to friends, and even seeing meeting with friends. Most of the teenagers you talk to, if not all of them, just being at school is all about being with friends. So when all of that's been taken away from them, or restricted to some extent, it could really be unhealthy, both mentally and emotionally for teenagers. So I want to share with you three things, at least from an Islamic perspective that can help us keep our teenagers motivated during this isolation period, especially when they're
restricted to seeing anybody else except their own immediate family within their house. So the first thing is, keep young people busy. And that's really important, because a lot of the stress comes from when they just don't have nothing to do, or they're just always bored. I mean, going outside, like going to the lobby or going out into the driveway. I mean, that's really not going outside and doing anything. And they're not able to go visit anywhere you can go to a mall, you can go to a cinema, you can do anything. So keeping them busy. So you have to find things in your house that you can do, that can keep young people constantly busy, give them a project of some sort, if you have
yard work to do left, then go outside and do some yard work. Now where I'm getting all of this from is that the general rule of thumb is that when you keep somebody just idling without focused on anything to do, or anything to keep themselves occupied, what ends up happening, everything starts to become boring. Or they'll just end up binging on YouTube or on their phones, and you know those things, I get it, you know, we might be a little bit more loose when it comes to using gadgets during this isolation period. But it's important that you keep those things also under control and use this time to just keep busy with a lot of the things that you've been putting off for some time.
And from an Islamic perspective, especially for the parents out there, this is the time where you really try to keep your teenagers engaged in some kind of schedule, some kind of routine. So if you've wanted them to memorize some color, and if you wanted them to study something, if you wanted to them to review anything, this is the time to do it. It's not just about their schoolwork every single day. But also, as we've always said in the past that one of the most effective things that you can do to counter what they're learning in school to making sure that they also continue to build themselves and learn about their religion, about who they are their identity, and preserving
all of those things is counter it. So if you have five or six hours of just school time online, then you need a couple of hours as well with some important time some a lot of time. Which brings me to the second point, there has to be hell of a time. So the first thing is all about keeping busy. But the second thing that really keeps you teenagers in particular motivated is you have to have halaqaat time. Now what does halaqaat time mean? Guys, this is the time where every single day you have a moment where you as a family, do something Islamic, talk about something Islamic. You know, one of the most unfortunate tragedies of teaching young people Islam is that a lot of parents will
spend all their time and energy teaching teenagers, Islam, and they themselves the parents will learn nothing.
Me being an Islamic teacher, one of the biggest challenges I have with the young people. It's not actually to teach young people it's not to actually keep them in a classroom and have them engaged in what I'm trying to do. It's actually when I let them go home, and what they're exposed to and what they're told and what they're not told when they're in when they're home with their families. That's the biggest challenge because why I can't do anything to teach that or to influence that. Because at the end of the day, they're under the control of whoever it is that they live with. So that's fine. The point is, is that now when you have halaqaat time, you can take a lot of the things
that you do as a family or you
Believe as a family, I try to gauge that into what the poor and assuming that tells us to do. So when we talk about the stories of the poor, and for example, if you take at least some halachot time, when you're at the dinner table, when you're outside, when you're in the backyard, whatever it is, and I've been doing this, and I can't tell you enough, how incredibly uplifting it's been for me and mom and our kids, that sometimes we would just be sitting there, like, we'd be watching TV. And then I would see something like a beautiful scenery or something, but I would show up on the screen, and then I would pause the TV. And then I would tell my kids, I said, you know, this is what Allah
says about trees in the poor and about the oceans and the poor. And we would see like beautiful fishes and beautiful animals, because we love sitting there and watching Animal Planet. So we will sit there and watch it all day. And then I will talk to them. And I say, you know, Subhana Look how Allah designed this creature. You know, if we see ants, or the spider, we would talk about sort of Milan Caboose, or we'll talk about that, and in the Quran. And then we'll talk about the story of Solomon. And if they're just blown away, because they've never heard those things before, to be able to connect what they see in real life to religion, we found was really important. You see, that's
something that you're going to have to teach yourself in order to be teach your children that. So you also have to be engaged in something. So for the parents out there, if you want your teenagers in particular, to be encouraged and motivated islamically, during this isolation period, show them as well, that you yourself as a parent are encouraged and motivated. And one thing that I want to say on this subject is, is especially for the parents out there that you know, constantly pushing the kids to learn their religion, but they themselves don't know how to recite any sort of
basic when it comes to the Quran. This is particularly important for them that remember that Allah subhanaw taala will ask you first about what you've done for the sake of Allah, what you've done in the in the religion, as the Hadeeth can goes on. And it says, a woman who said, What do I know who Leona piano to solder, the first thing that the person is asked about on the Day of Judgment is their prayer. Now, what scholars took from that is you're asked about the acts of worship, that have everything to do with you, not with anybody else. So the fact that when you're praying, you're praying for yourself, all the cloud and the door as you do that for yourself. And so that's the
first thing you're being talked about. And if it is good, then the rest of your Hey, SAP or your accountability will be good. But if it is not, that would be a reflection of what the rest of the accountability would be. So parents also take this time for yourself to improve yourself, to learn some of the things that you've been pushing your kids to learn, now, maybe is a good time for you to learn a little bit of that too. And the third and the last thing that I want to leave you with in sha Allah huhtala is of course, so we have the first thing of keeping them busy. Number two was hell of a time Calico literally means a circle. So coming together and discussing something Islamic. And
the third is most important as well in that is having some social time, some downtime with the family. So yes, this is where we have just a good time, whatever it is that you want to do with gold, go for a drive. If you watch a movie, if you just sit at home and play some games, I don't know, whatever it is that you do for fun. Profit IE salatu salam spent a lot of his time teaching companions, you know, he would allocate certain companions to teach certain things, he himself would teach certain things. And he would allocate a time in a day to do all of this. But there was also stories of him that he would wrestle with his companions, he would race with some of his companions,
even some of his wives, he would be sitting there and he would just race with them, and they would just have a good time. There are stories of him and a shot of the Alomar. And they will be sitting together and you know what they would do? They would just talk, what are they talking about anything and everything. It was just downtime. And he would sit there and he shouted the alarm he would come and she would tell tell him the profit. It was from all the people that she talked to that day and what they were all talking about. And just he would sit there and he would listen to all of that. And they would have their own garden. So they would have an area right by the Prophet's Masjid where
they would just go there and they would have some alone time they would sit, they would walk around, they would play they would do whatever it is that they want. They just had this nice social time where it wasn't about teaching. It wasn't about getting serious about anything. And a prophet alayhi salaatu wa Salaam used to do this with all of his companions as well. There are stories of him in it out of the Allah one where they used to wrestle one another and literally see who could pin the person down to the ground first, and he would do this with other companions as well. And again, all for fun, and some of them they were describing the winner process and it was over like if he won.
You could see his molar Tate teeth meaning he would smile
He would laugh so much that you could see, you know, the back of his mouth. And that's really, really beautiful. It just gives us a perspective, especially for a lot of the Muslims that maybe find it difficult to just smile once in a while to be happy to share some of that joy and some of that humor with family, especially teenagers. This is the time where you can break some of those barriers, where if you have a difficult time getting through and talking with teenagers, if you have a difficult time asking them like how was your day, but they're not telling you anything, you know, you're not, you're not the first person they're thinking about, you're not the person that they're
going to come to and call them your friend, you're not the person that they're going to open up with all of their secrets do? Well, this is the time to break down some of those barriers and just be yourself parents. So the onus is a lot on the parents than it is on the teenagers. Because remember, at the end of the day, when teenagers act this way, where they want to be isolated, they want to be secluded, they want to do their own thing, they're plugged into their phones, they're just keeping in touch with friends, and so on. They're kind of doing what teenagers do. And so for us, as parents, now we have to be able to see through that and know how to engage and just talk to them in
a way that doesn't make them feel like they're terrible people, that they're always doing something wrong. And so with these three tools, insha Allah, it would help motivate us to get through to them and to be able to encourage them in a good way not to judge them not to make them feel bad not to make them feel horrible, and put them down, etc, etc, I want to say to the parents that are listening to this is just keep in mind that a lot of the young students that you trust me to teach, these are some of the things that come back and tell us teach teachers that you know, it's really hard for them to talk to mom or dad or both. It's really hard, they have a sibling, but they're
always fighting. So these are the things that I want to come back to you and say, you know, I'm not just pulling this out of left field that this is actually coming from young people themselves. And these are the things that they ask us and they tell us that this is what's happening. And this is how it makes me feel when I get home. I'm always being you know, told to do this do that I can't sit down. And even if I do something, I'm never shown any gratitude, nobody appreciates what I do and so on and the list goes on. So these are some things that inshallah can help us get through that. So number one is of course, to keep them busy. Number two is to have adequate time to have a time where
you're actually just talking about something beautiful, that's appealing to you that you love about Islam. And number three, of course is family time. When you're not doing anything serious, you're just having downtime between you and your kids. I hope that helps guys all of this is found in the poor enemy and so now tomorrow inshallah we'll continue with our reflections but other than that, I hope that helps. So if you have any questions you can by all means send them to me in this.
This watching we'll call it the comments line and I'll try my best to get to them in sha Allah in the next presentation. Okay, the next webinar, take care of you one may Allah subhanho wa Taala protect you. As you all know, I don't like to keep these videos long. So I hope that that is enough for now. Take care, guys, cenomar alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh