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Ramadan 2022 – The Manners of The Believers #06 – Controlling Anger

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Yasir Qadhi

Channel: Yasir Qadhi

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Episode Notes

One of the seminal mannerisms that defines a person of faith is the control that he has over anger. The believer, even if he becomes angry, manages to keep that anger in check, and not act or speak upon that anger. Allah describes the people of taqwa as those who ‘…control their anger’ [كاظمين الغيظ]. And our Prophet (SAW) remarked that the strong person is not one who is able to overpower others, but rather the one who can control his temper. In one hadith, he said that the one who controls his anger has conquered not only his own nafs, but also his qarīn (the Shaytan that whispers to him), and the qarīn of the one who tries to make him angry. Being the role model that he (SAW) was, there is not a *single* instance in his entire life in which his temper got the better of him. Even when his anger was known to others, he always managed to control it and keep it in check

Episode Transcript

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salaam alaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh. Today inshallah we'll continue where we left off from yesterday we were talking about the characteristic of him when our Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam praised Allah schedge he said, You have to characteristic a hell mole Anna. And we said helm has two meanings. The first is wisdom. We did that yesterday, and today we'll do the second half of him which is to control your anger of the names of Allah is Al Halim. And the primary meaning when it comes to the name of Allah al Halim is that Allah azza wa jal is the one who controls his anger against the creation who deserves to be punished, but he does not punish them. Our Prophet

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sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, there is no entity that has more patience than Allah. They ascribe partners to Allah, and they say that he has a son, and yet he continues to provide for them. And Allah azza wa jal calls himself al Halim multiple times in the Quran. For example, Allah says, Why Nemo, know that Allah knows what is in your hearts know that Allah knows what's inside of you. And know that Allah is love food, and Allah is Al Halim. Al Halim once again means the one who gets angry but controls his anger, and Allah Himself is Al Halim, and he praises him and he praises his believers who has him. Allah praises the Prophet Ibrahim in the Quran in Hokkaido, A WA he was the

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one coming back to Allah Halim. Ibrahim was Halim, and Allah praises Ibrahim because he has had him the concept of covering your anger concealing your anger is of the essential characteristics of the believer in one verse in the Quran, Allah subhana wa Taala links controlling your anger to number one being forgiven. Number two entering Jannah that is larger than the heavens and earth and number three being amongst them with Turkey in all three are linked to controlling your anger. Allah says in the Quran was sad you're in Mo Farah Tamia Rob become rush to be forgiven by your Lord number one. Number two what Jen nuttin Aldo has some hour to an hour and a half an agenda whose wit is more

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than all that you can see. And number three prepared for the Mutata in who are they who are forgiven and who have this vast Jana and all of them with Tophane. Allah describes them, they give up their money frequently in difficulty and in ease. And while Calvary mionetto Higher VA they control their anger. So Allah describes them with Tolkien as being those who control their anger. Allah describes the people of Jenna and the people of Mount FIRA as those who control their anger. A technical point here, the Quran uses a phrase Calvary Mina Hi, Eva, and not Cal the needle hub. What's the difference in Arabic between high yield and a hub? A high of our scholars say the scholars of

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language say lay is the beginnings of hub. Hub is the end and the high yield is the beginning. So Allah is saying when the anger is boiling, when it's just about to erupt, they control it, because if they don't control it, it will become herb herb you can see on the face in the hands, how have you see the effects, right? It's still in the art. So Allah is saying, Calvin, Calvin means to pull back. Calvin means like the reins of the horse. You pull it back. This is Obama. You pulled the horse back. So Calvary Mina live, the huddle is coming. It's about to come out, but they pull it back down. They push it down. This is Calvin, Meena Leo. And this is metaphor is further expounded

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in a hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in western a Muhammad he said, There is nothing that a person swallows, that is more beloved to Allah, and more rewarded by Allah than swallowing his own anger. He gave the metaphor people are going to think some food is coming, some drink is coming. No, what is the most beloved thing to put inside and to not take it out? What is the most pleasing to Allah? When you take your own anger and we say in English, you put a lid on it, you cover it up, you make sure nobody see

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That anger, you keep it in check. There is nothing more beloved to Allah than to keep your anger in check. And the man came to the Prophet sallallahu sallam, he said, Yeah, Rasul Allah give me comprehensive advice. Give me a simple piece of advice. The prophets have said, Don't get angry a lot of them. He said, Okay, what after that, no, don't get angry. What's the next piece Don't get angry, he kept on repeating until the man understood. That was the entire advice. And by the way, we said the term healthy means wise. And it also means controlling your anger. Why? Because you cannot be wise if you don't control your anger. It's interesting. The term in it has two meanings as we

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said, wisdom and controlling anger, because you cannot be wise if you allow your anger to go out of check. And our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was once passing by, and there was a competition of wrestling going on, you know, wrestling, in the old days, they had wrestling, the old style wrestling, not the boxing, wrestling, you know, you throw your person on the ground, and you put him on his back, the old school wrestling. They said you had a suit Allah, you see that man, no one has beaten him yet in the competition. He's the gold belt winner, right? He's number one hour Prophet sallallahu. I sent him said, Do you know who is stronger than him? You know, this number one, the

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gold belt winner, you know, stronger than him. Listen to this hadith. He said the man who when he is provoked with somebody speech, he controls his anger. And when he controls his anger, yuck, the more Halo the same phrase. When he controls his anger, he conquers his knifes number one. Number two, he conquers his own shape on. And number three, he conquers the shape on of the one who made him angry. Three people are conquered when you conquer your anger, your own soul, your own shaitan who wants you to get angry, and the shaytaan of the guy who wanted to provoke you when he said something nasty, he said a mean statement. And you control your anger. You have knocked three birds with one

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stone, your own ego, your own shaytaan and the shaytaan of that person as well. There's an authentic hadith in the Muslim of Imam Al Bazar. So controlling your anger is of the key characteristics of the movement and Subhanallah you look at the Sierra of our Prophet salallahu it he was set up truly it is phenomenal. I mean, who amongst us has not gotten angry who amongst us has not lost it every once in a while. Even the one who's the most calm and the most collect once in a while they lose it Subhan Allah, but in the entire Sierra, not once did our Prophet salallahu it he was seldom lose control of his temper, not one occasion, neither with his wives nor in public nor in pride. He never

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did. He could not control his anger. Yes, he got angry many times. But the anger was kept in check. The anger was in control. The Sahaba knew when he was angry, they could see it on his face, but they could not see it in his actions. You would control his anger, like in the famous Hadith that long Hadith batise I became in the process and was angry at him because he disobeyed something. So the sahabi said, I saw the promises of smile. But it was the smile he did when he was angry, beautiful phrase here. Even in his anger, he covered the anger up and he forced a smile. But the sahabi picked up he goes that was the smile that he would do when He was angry. It's not his real smile. So even

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when he was angry, he would control his anger. Now you will say, tempers are beyond my control. We are born some of us with quick tempers. And some of us we have Alhamdulillah high tolerance level. And I say to you, you're absolutely correct that indeed, our broker and Mr. Viola Honda are not the same. We know this right? I will walk around the allaahu. And it's a very different person or model. The alone is a very different person, by the way, even Ibaka Siddiq in the incident of Arabia, his anger was more than Omar and even Obama hottub sometimes he collected his coal more than aboubaker. The interesting point, by the way, and what we know he was a bit more tempered earlier on in his

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life, when he became the Khalifa SubhanAllah. That's when he actually controlled his temper more than before. It is as if, when Abu Bakar was alive when the Prophet system was alive, he knew there's checks and balances, but when he became the Khalifa, he realized I need to control so he controlled his own temper. And this is the essence of Eman. We say to this person who believes that tempers are beyond one's control. We say it is true that some people are quicker to be angry than others. But Allah's reward will be proportional to your own fitrah your own massage, so the one whose temper is quick, when he controls his anger, his reward will be much more than the one whom

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Allah created to be calm and collect so your rewards are not the same. All you who struggling with a temporary issue with an anger management issue. Realize your rewards are much more if you control than the one who doesn't have that issue. Now

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What do we do when we feel anger? Well, from the Hadith we learned a number of things. First and foremost we know our Prophet sallallahu sallam said a whole Babu Mina shape on anger is from Shavon Shavon loves to make you angry. Why? Because anger is the root of the majority of problems that happened between mankind how many brothers have fallen into fighting? How many uncles and nephews how many family members don't speak to one another because of anger? How many marriages have broken how many friendships have ended because of an anger issue? Subhanallah how many careers have ended because of one slap that might have happened in anger? I'll just quickly move on from that point.

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Point is one slit simple. Slip of anger can literally ruin an entire friendship or an entire career. So our promises and reminded us a hollow boom in a shape on anger comes from Shaytaan. When we're aware that shaitan is going to use anger, we have to be on the lookout. So what do we do? Number two, when one of you gets angry, the prophets have said seek refuge in Allah from shaitan say ro bIllahi min ash shaytani R rajim. Number three, our prophets are some said angers from shaitaan shaitaan is from the fire. So when you get angry do we'll do so do we'll do number four, when anger is from Shere Khan, and you're going to be boiling inside our Prophet sallallahu sallam said, if

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you're standing sit down, if you're sitting lie down, you force yourself to adopt a calmer posture. So these are things that are explicitly mentioned in the sooner. Our scholars have enough scholars of the tibia scholars as souk, they give other things that can be done of them. Those of you who have a quick temper, learn the symptoms and signs of your own anger when it's coming. Learn to monitor your own anger inside of you and take precautions when you see those signs coming. Also, when you are angry, or you're about to get angry, walk away from the situation because when you see the person who caused you that anger you might lose it in a faster manner. So do not remain in the

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same area. Go away and calm down. Also never act in a state of anger. In fact, this is a prophetic Hadith as well. Don't speak or don't act when you're angry. Calm down, wait, collect your thoughts. Do not even reply to an email or put a Facebook post or write a Twitter nothing when you're angry. First calm down and then respond after you have thought things through. Also realize brothers and sisters, factually speaking completely factual. Anger causes medical problems, it causes high blood pressure, this is factors studies have shown this it causes high blood pressure it caught it leads to depression, your own knifes is going to be convoluted when you're angry. So realize you might not

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control the source of the anger If somebody is mean somebody is nasty, somebody has threatened you, somebody has slandered you, you might not control that person. But if you allow your anger to remain, you have allowed that person to control you. And if you allow the anger to dissipate that Subhanallah you that person has no more control over you. And final point, the scholars have enough scholars of psychology they say most of anger is linked to your own ego. Now that's a very powerful and harsh statement. But I want you to think about it. Why do you get angry because you feel your your ego your McCollum has been insulted. Most anger is linked to your own perception of yourself.

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If you lower your own perception, if you swallow your own ego, most of your own anger will be eliminated. Subhanallah so if you have humility, and if you know who you are, and you know who you are in the eyes of Allah subhanho wa Taala if somebody says something nasty about you, you have to think to yourself Subhanallah May Allah subhana not make me like that and move on. May Allah not make me like this and move on. So when you conquer your own ego in reality, you have conquered most of the source of your own anger. So brothers and sisters, to conclude here, even Massoud said are the Allahu ang. If you want to judge a man. Don't judge him when he acts calmly judge him when he's

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angry and see how he acts. This is the real test of a man when a person's angry, then see how he acts if he can remain Tane his cool and composure and he can act in a fair manner than that is the real man may Allah subhana wa Tada makers amongst those who can control their anger will continue tomorrow. Shaula Santa Monica Monique motorola moto culture

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