Channel: Tarek Kareem Harris
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim Welcome to the second part of the video, and which we're looking at one of Mufti monks talks and the science and Islamic psychology behind it.
Let's listen on to what he says next. control your temper you have paradise. Why? Because I will control my temper when it comes to you. That's what it is. You wanted to you could, you almost exploded. But you come down, you control yourself. You forgave. On the day when Allah will be so angry with those who have disbelieved. He will forgive you, he will look at you with the eyes of mercy. Because you used to look at the others with the eye of mercy. Because when you could vent your frustrations and your anger, you didn't, you actually held back. So genma is prepared for who for those who get angry, but suppressive as soon as they can.
right he goes on to explain something about the nature and character of Allah and his desires for us as human beings. Firstly, God has given you the power of anger. Why might he give us this? Because in its true intentions, anger is a statement that this is hurtful to me, and I'm reacting to the pain with some energy. It reminds me very sharply that something is not right. You would surely agree that this in a small amount is very useful. Secondly, anger is a motive force, which when it is muted, suppressed, not dismissed, it becomes useful. Notice how moved he said suppressed, not rejected or forgotten. suppress means made smaller, made manageable. Why? Because anger can be a
positive motive force. If we are to act wisely. According to the message hidden within its silence, we can act to correct the error or offence that caused it when we are our better selves. Mufti goes to explain that God himself has anger. And that anger comes when he sees that we fail him or fail ourselves in some way. So having anger itself does not make you a sinner. It's what you do with it. First, he suggests you show mercy against the thing or person who wronged you. Because the smart thing at this stage is not to take account of who is to blame for what that only leads to counter accusations and denial, you are commanded to be as God promises to be to you. Namely, you should be
far more ready to forgive than to punish. It is clear that this mindset is emotionally intelligent, and leads to far greater mental health and well being. And moreover, far better relationships with those around you.
The world is guaranteed to disappoint you. This is one of the truths of life. So it is not up to you to be arrogant in hoping to change all of it. choose your battles carefully. And that means get on top of your anger yourself. Or else it will decide the outcome of your life, not you. Forgiveness also is complete. It doesn't require the other person to apologize, you forgive them, because you deserve peace. And you cannot find peace. If you demand things from other people. You have to find it in yourself. Let's continue. So Allah says, My Paradise is prepared for those who can suppress their anger. So here's an interesting development. He's talking about paradise. Why is paradise some
kind of precious biscuits and prize for behaving in the way that you're told? Well, it isn't. Although many people do take it like that. They think that the promise of Paradise is part of what we call operant conditioning, that you get a reward for a good deed and a punishment for a bad one. But that's not enough. And that's not totally complete. science shows us that operant conditioning doesn't work in two conditions. Firstly, if the Act and the reward are very far apart in time, well, Paradise is literally a lifetime away. Secondly, the complex human mind doesn't do well with a simple tip for tat reward and punishment system. This is subject to decay, people soon become numb
to the promise of the same thing, or the punishment of the same thing every time they do something right or wrong. He talks about paradise because he is touching on a far more powerful and reliable controller of good behavior. And that is higher purpose. we as human beings achieved much greater things in life. And we often rest the entire meaning of our lives and risk more than many would believe. If there is a higher meaning to something that we do something beyond the everyday. And if you think about it in the heat of the moment, it is this higher meaning that gives you a sense of perspective. It helps you to see over and above, reacting to whatever petty and ultimately short
lived thing is getting you emotional right now.
So we're getting on to the final part of his talk. Now. Let's listen on through to the end. Those who suppress their anger, they don't allow it to get to a point where it affects another person and getting angry, to become angry is human nature. But as soon as it starts building in me, I start suppressing it. I think of Allah. I might read the Quran, I might make Voodoo, I might start a bit of Salah whatever calms you down, the sooner says like I said, oh do Billahi min ash shaytani r Rajim Have a sip of water.
So Mufti ends off by describing alternatives to the method is to do whatever works, to break your arm to make with you, but see it importantly, as a process, a series of steps which take time, one after the other, involving actions, remembered words, and thinking of higher things, giving yourself simple steps which helped to remove you from the position of anger, both psychologically and physically.
Alhamdulillah there are many other things I could add. It could go on for hours. Alhamdulillah even just considering this very small speech, such as the depth and wisdom of Islamic psychology. Let me know how you feel and pass this video on to others. We all need to embrace our nature and find ways of bringing out the best in ourselves.
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