Being Rude on Social Media

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Saad Tasleem

Channel: Saad Tasleem

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Episode Transcript

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My dear brothers and sisters, I want to share with you quickly an incident that occurred with me not too long ago. So I'm fairly active on social media, as I'm sure a lot of you are as well. And I had posted something on one of my social media pages. And there was one particular comment, that was particularly nasty. And that's not strange. That's not the strange part of the story, because it's common to see people say things,

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you know, let's say, and not so nice way. But what made this odd was I actually knew who this brother was. And because I know him, I know, pretty much for a fact that if he was standing in front of me, if we were making eye contact, he would not have said, what he said, or at least, he would not have said it the way he said it.

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And for me, that was a very big lesson in how the world that we're living in right now 2021, and how social media has become such a big part of our lives. It's also presented us with the reality of what is happening inside our hearts. Because why do people let loose on social media? Why do people say things on social media that they might not say to you in person? Well, there's a false sense of security, being behind the screen, being separated from the person. And on some level, there is a level of security that you know what, it's not going to make a difference. It's not going to, I won't really have to deal with the true consequences of my words. You see, for us, as believers as

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Muslims, whether social media exists or not, we already have the very important lesson that our words carry weight in this life, and the afterlife as well. Allah who's handling data reminds us my Yun Federman, Colin, in Latter Day here a table I think that a person does an utter a single word or a single statement, except that is being observed and written down.

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Not a single thing that we say, except that it is written down. Why? Well, it is written down because we are accountable beings, who will have to answer for what we said not only what we did, but also our speech. So sometimes you find people who are shocked that maybe they posted something online. And then five years later, someone digs it up and finds it, and they may lose a job because they said something, you know, foul isn't that bad. And they'll say, you know, I was just joking, or I was younger than I'm a different person now, or this and that. Well, as a believer, once again, we understand that everything we say everything we do, is written for our own accountability. There's a

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very compelling to me a very scary Hadith of the prophets that I send them in which he tells us of this very issue. He said, some a lover, I didn't send them in the lab, the letter can never been cleaner, that is servant, a person may say a single word or a single statement, mean something that, from the displeasure from the anger of Allah, No, you cannot burden not caring about it, not thinking much of it. So what is this scenario that the prophets I send them in describing a person says something? They didn't even think twice about it? But it's from the dish, this pleasure of Allah who's kind of want to address the problem in summarizing them. He said, Yeah, we'd be happy.

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Yeah, we'd be happy to hidden and then he will fall into the depths of Hellfire by the single statement that they said, Can you imagine how many things we say on a daily basis that we don't even think twice? If

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we assume that we said it and it's gone in our minds, it's over there, we no longer have to deal with the consequences

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of that statement of that word.

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You know, a sauna that many people recite on Fridays. So the gap,

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Allah tells us

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about a particular group of people who will come on the day of judgment and they will be surprised. There'll be shocked

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because everything they said, everything they did, was recorded. I was how do I get out of it says But will they heat up? That the record of deeds will be placed mean placed in front of them? for people to witness, but they'll usually mean I was 15 I mean, Murphy. There you will see that the criminals the wrongdoer.

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is fearful of what is in this book?

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Because even if we're in denial, right, we don't think about it. Maybe you know, our base, how long maybe some of us, months, years may have gone by we actually sat down and said, like, you know, do I really think about what I say? What is the impact of it on people? What is the impact of it on myself? What is the impact of my children? What is the impact on my community, who may not have ever considered that. But on a subconscious level, I think as as human beings, first of all, but but especially as believers, we understand the notion of accountability. It's part of our fitful, it's part of our nature to know that someone who does wrong, should be punished for that wrong, and

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someone who does good should be rewarded for that good.

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That is why

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the Day of Judgment is called your wages up the day of reward or punishment. Right? Because that is the end we are on some level as human beings, we understand that. And so these people, Allah tells us, they will see this record of deeds being placed in front of them, and they will become fearful of this record of deeds. Wait, hold on, yeah, way that

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they will say, Whoa, be on to us money, how to get out. What kind of book is this? What kind of record is this? Now you are the real selling and I don't want to carry on in

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that it doesn't have a single small or big D.

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Except that it is found in it.

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Like things that we thought it's just a small thing like nobody saw it wasn't a big deal. It didn't impact anyone.

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Big or small. It is found in this book. And then Allah is kind of like that. It says, Well, what do I do, man, I need to know how they are. And they will find that which they did to be present right in front of them. As if it is just happened.

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As if there was no lapse in time.

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We will see it and we will know and this is why love is how do I get out it says What about your book. And your Lord doesn't oppress anyone doesn't wrong anyone? Meaning the people they love protect us, even the people going to the hellfire. Never will they complain and say Allah was unjust to me. Never will a person Milla protected, who's going to the Hellfire? Never will that person say I don't deserve this.

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Or this is unfair.

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Because Allah is not unfair. Everyone will have what they deserve. Yes, we know that people will be regretful. And we have numerous instances in the Quran, Allah give the scenarios of people who are regretful on the Day of Judgment, but never do we find it was kind of data telling us that a person comes on the day of judgment and says this is not fair. Allah is not being fair to me. Why? Because we understand this very issue of accountability.

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Deep down inside, and especially on the Day of Judgment is something that will be laid clear, tough, and that is why when it comes to our words, we have a very clear principle given to us by laws of data.

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Well, according to the nursing personnel, and speak good to people, for us as Muslims, this is not just a statement in the pond. This is a principle that we live our lives by. We ask ourselves is my speech hasn't is my speech. Good? Speak good to people. And our scholars tell us actually following the hazard includes two things, two requirements. Number one,

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that what we're saying is actually good. It's correct. It's right. It's good. So we don't lie. We don't deceive people. We don't say anything that is wrong or incorrect. But it doesn't stop there. The second condition is that the way it is said

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is good as well. Because we all know, you can say something perfectly correct and perfectly right. But it's said in a terrible way. I mean, let's take a clear cut example of that. Telling someone to pray their folk prayer, okay. And obligation upon us as believers. Is that good? Absolutely. Absolutely. It's good to encourage someone to pray.

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But it can be said in a way that is demeaning. And it can be said in a way that is condescending, isn't it can be set in a way that insults the person that puts them down. And this no longer remains our hazard. Because the manner in which it is said is not has. It's not good. It's not beautiful. So to beautify what we're saying and beautify how we're saying it as well. We asked the lovers

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How

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to purify our hearts and to purify our tongues. Abu Dhabi has stuff for you welcome Mr. Farrow in no

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hamdulillahi alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala cumbia even more serene? The vino says you know how do you know Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi that you have a

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you know, I mentioned our hearts that we ask the Lord to purify our hearts.

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We make this do

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because our hearts have an effect on every part of our being.

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The profits of the lights and them isn't nothing just the most.

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Certainly in the body, there is a piece of meat, piece of flesh, either fuller head, so I guess it could do if it is doing well. With sound if it's good, if it's okay, then the rest of the body will be okay as well. What either fess had that pressure that you just couldn't do. If it is ruined, if it is corrupted, then the rest of the body will be corrupted as well will be ruined as well. I know he'll

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the province. I said that. He said certainly that is the heart.

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If you find someone who has a foul mouth, a foul tone, if you find someone they love attacked, if you find someone who has no problem lying, no problem, insulting people, no problem yelling at people. That is an indication that perhaps there's an issue with their spirituality.

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This is an issue, there's something wrong in the heart

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is an issue in reality of tech walk because what is step one? Step one is God consciousness is to live our lives in a way that we're thinking about a lot. Now, before we say something we ask ourselves, is this pleasing to Allah? Is this powerful hazard? Is this good speech or not?

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That is step one. And that is a process that starts a tugboat martyrdoms attack wahana taco is here. It starts within us. And then yes, it has implications on our action now our deeds.

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And that is why I love our brothers and sisters. I don't want to stand up here and say that we have to be perfect, because the reality is we're human beings. And we all make mistakes, and we all fall short. And it's not that you know, a person has never said anything bad in their life. That's not really a realistic goal. We all make mistakes. We all have times where we fall short. But the question is, are we regretful of those times do we learn from those times? Are we in a process of purification?

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We can slip up obviously we're human beings, just as in any sin, we may slip up. But what happens after that sin is crucial. We learned that lesson without value is set up.

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Set up disobeyed a lot.

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But what raised us up in status is Toba that she upon on the other hand also disobeyed Allah. He refused to prostrate before us.

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But his reaction to his sin was the opposite. He became arrogant enough a little minut I'm better than him. You created me from fire and greeting from clay meaning he is telling a lot a lot. I don't deserve to prostrate before I am better than he become became arrogant. And likewise, Milla protected, there are people who may say something foul or something wrong or something mean or hurtful? And if they're reminded, hopefully when other hasn't, if they're reminded, they're like, no, what I'm saying is correct.

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Hey, what I'm saying is correct. And then we double down on this bad speech. This is why humility is such an important part of our own essence of love. It's kind of like the Allah describes the man,

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the slaves of the merciful the servants of the mercy of the pious believers, Allah whose pattern went to Allah tells us that these are those are about the right man and Lady, a young shoe holder, that they walk upon the earth with humility. And what is the reward of that humility, being humble?

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What are you the heart of our

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call center?

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If the ignorant

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address them, how do ignorant people address people with ignorance with foul speech?

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If they're addressed in that way, they reply with peace.

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This is the reward of humility. And so even with people who show hatred towards us,

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that does a black man

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right?

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Fly with peace. A love is kind of what it says it's been there to hear ascendancy repel evil with that which is better.

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Right. That is an essential part of our Goodspeed. So if you were to say how do I make sure my speeches good? Well, the first thing is, we need to work on our hearts

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strengthen our connection with Allah, Allah. Second

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is we need to be careful about desensitization. desensitization is when something happens so much around us that we begin to view it as normal. I remember some how to love studying at the University of Medina, and being in Medina for about nine months.

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And I remember coming home in the summertime.

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And you know, being in Medina, especially being at the university setting, you wouldn't really hear people curse. You wouldn't hear people use foul language. And so sometimes like you go nine months, you've never heard somebody curse.

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And then I remember his power getting on the plane landing in Dulles Airport. And the first time you would hear someone throw an F bomb or listen down, or whatever curse word. And it would like hurt to hear, like, I can't believe I've never heard that I'm not used to hearing that.

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But what would happen as the summer goes on, I spend more time here with the family. You hear what you know, because it's become normalized now

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that people curse and we accept it. And as you know, we as human beings, we adapt very quickly, we adapt to good, and we adapt to that as well. If we are surrounded by bad for long enough, we begin to view that bad is normal.

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This is why one of the reasons oppression takes place on Earth.

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Because as the oppression, we begin to witness it.

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At a certain time, we become desensitized to it. And people say how can we allow these crimes to happen in humanity? How can we allow people to suffer? What is wrong with you? Well, a lot of times, it's just the process of desensitization.

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And so likewise, with our speech, we need to be careful what we expose ourselves to,

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you know, sometimes we have these expectations from our kids, for the for the for the parents in the house,

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we don't want our kids to curse, we want them to have a pure tone. Well, we can preach as much as we want. But if they don't see us practicing that,

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then it's gonna be very hard to impart that message upon them. Because kids learn from behavior a lot more than they learn from what we're telling them. And it's not just the moments where everything's fine, because you know what, the vast majority of us if things are going fine, we'll be fine. Someone is nice to us. We're nice to them. Someone who's older hasn't with us, we use go to high school with them, no problem. But what happens when you're pulling up in the mesh, and someone cuts you off and take your spot?

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Cause maybe in the message you're like, you know what is Juma? You know, we're here to bring you out. I'm okay.

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Right? We say our apology when we feel that surge of anger.

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But we're outside and someone cuts us off.

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And then our adrenaline begins.

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What happens in that case, because it may be a fleeting moment for us. But for our child who is sitting in the backseat, that's a learning moment. And so sometimes our children learn that when you get frustrated, when you get angry, you gotta yell, you got to scream, you got to curse. Sometimes in our relationships.

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The first teacher of a child when it comes to how to treat your spouse is their parents. A young boy learns from his father, how his father, feed his mother, a young girl learns from his mother, how her mother dealt with her father. And so if a child is brought up in a household, where the parents when they get upset at each other, they start yelling and screaming and belittling the other person

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and start being mean to them, then that's, that's normalized for the child.

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Then on a certain level, sometimes it's subconscious level, the child grows up, and I have why I've spoken to people like this, who are like, you know, I'm a really calm person. Like I don't, you know, I don't flip out. But for some reason, like when there's an argument with my spouse, I just lose it.

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And it happens because this is a learned behavior

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and needs to be unlearned, obviously for this person. But as parents, we have a responsibility couldn't look them right. We are all Shepherd but couldn't look at

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it. Every single person is responsible for their flock. So we have to ask

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ourselves who's our flop? But what are we teaching them? We ask the panelists, to make us the best of shepherds we ask them

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to purify our hearts, our actions, our deeds, our tongues, we ask the lungs out of that we live our lives in his pleasure We ask Allah who to penalize that when we are and when we make us make make a mistake and sin we return swiftly to Allah who handle the data a lot. I mean, yeah, you had the dino harmony in the Mortal Kombat I don't even

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know why didn't have an infection.

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Yeah, either.

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From

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one or the other. about this in their own woman, this article