Spiritual Growth #11 Achieving Patience

Musleh Khan


Channel: Musleh Khan


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The importance of patient mental health is discussed in Islamic law, with three categories: achieving goals, maintaining balance, and remaining under control. The definition of patience is defined in Islamic law, including restraining behavior and patient mental health. The speaker emphasizes the need for patient forgiveness and embracing pain in life, as well as the importance of patient forgiveness and staying disciplined in order to maintain healthy mental health. The speakers stress the importance of patient forgiveness, managing behavior, and embracing pain in life for everyone to have a good life.

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Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah. So today it's all about achieving patience. And normally when we talk about this subject we forget we focus and we emphasize on all the blessings and all of the rewards of being patient. And the Quran as email him Allah mentions, there are over 90 places in the entire quarter and that patience is talked about or referred to. So we know that patience is a big deal. It is extremely important in the Quran. And we literally have dozens of a Hadith of the Prophet alayhi salaatu wa Salaam, talking to us about patience, and many of its rewards and blessings. And to make a long story short, just

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think of patience as the one characteristic or one etiquette of a believer that will ultimately end up in paradise. The patience takes you and guides you to Jenna, it guides you to a loss forgiveness and mercy Bismillah hytera. And one of the words or excuse me, one of the verses that are mentioned in the poor and that captures the beauty of the goal of patience is the verse mentioned in sorted order art, where Allah subhanho wa Taala describes to us when all the angels will come and they will flap their wings around the believer because why? Once judgment is over for that individual, and that person has been deemed or the pub or the ruling has been given that they will enter agenda. The

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angels want to celebrate with that individuals so they surround that person and they start to flap their wings in joy and celebration and happiness. And they will utter and say to this believer Selim when I lay combi Mount sabado tomb fenyr, Morocco bed Delta doubt, peace be unto you because of how patient you were in this worldly life, how much you endured with respect to patience, Fenella openbet de what a noble ending indeed. So in other words, they're basically celebrating that you did it, because of your patience, you did it, this is where it got you it got you that you had a a good judgment process or the accountability in front of Allah was peaceful, it was done, you succeeded,

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you pass that first phase of the Day of Judgment. And now here it is, now you will dwell now you will enjoy and live in paradise forever in sha Allah hotelera Allah, we pray that Allah subhanho wa Taala gives us that Aloma I mean, but then the second thing about this enormous subject of patience is normally when we do focus on on on the rewards and blessings. Very rarely we talk about how to develop patience. And it's not an easy task. And it's different for everyone how I will internalize and try to implement and practice patience in my own life. And the things that I do is very different than the next person, the next person might look at patients in a totally different way

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and interacted at a totally different level. And the highest level of patience is mentioned in the Quran about sort of ensuited usif about iacobelli his selam iacobelli his Salaam when he found out that okay, the sons came up with this massive plot kidnap Yusuf Alayhi Salam threw him into a well, everything unfolded and what happened happened. The point is, is that they came up with a story they relate that to the Father and the Father because he's a prophet of Allah already knew. Allah blessed him with the knowledge that he knew that this was not the truth and at some point, he will see Yusuf Alayhi Salam again, and then he makes a statement he says to them for submarine Jamil for submarine

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Jameel, I will have beautiful patience. And when we think about what beautiful patients is, you go back to sort of abusive to iacobelli Sam. Now what exactly is beautiful patience. Number one, beautiful patience is the highest level of patience in existence. And the example of that is iacobelli. His solemn here is a men that listened Well, first of all, he allowed his son which he was reluctant to do in the beginning, but he allowed his son Yusuf Ali, he slumped to go with the rest of the brothers. Why? Because it seemed like there was a history of jealousy and problems with the siblings with respect to Yusuf Ali Salaam, because it's kind of hinted in the beginning of that

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surah. So the point is that there was some history, there were problems amongst the siblings, and they all seem to have targeted Yusuf Ali Salim or treated him differently. And this was a result of their jealousy that the Father favored use of more than the others. And so they were jealous and they didn't like that atmosphere. And so they came up with this plot and they did what they did. A second thing about subaltern Jamil is how Yaqoob Alayhi Salaam reacts when he hears the news that his son has been taken.

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It's been thrown into a well, and then they came up with the slide at a wolf devoured him so on and so forth. how he responds, he listens. He listens to the story, although he knows deep down inside that it's not the truth like this can't be right. Wolves eating my son, I know you guys are making up something, but he still listens to it. So the second thing about beautiful patience is that you bear the burden, and you make that choice to bear the burden. So although it might cringe and it might upset you, it might feel a bit of frustration and anger in you to have to listen to someone making up a story making up lies or causing trouble. The point is, if you make the decision, the

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personal choice, that I'm just going to deal with this, I'm going to accept it for what it is. That's part of submarine Jimmy. And then the third thing is what Yaqoob Allah He Salaam says, For sovereign Jimmy one law, we must stand Island, tasi Tosi phone, Allah is going to be the one to help me based on what you all plotted based on what you all are doing. So the third quality of beautiful patience is that he has full and complete reliance and trust in Allah subhanho wa Taala to deal with his affairs. That's a tough thing to do. And the reason why I say it that way is just think about how you and I just regular average Muslims going about our day, doing the things that we do. So we

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work we go to school, we just live our day, a normally like anyone else. But when problems and afflictions and hardships and things that are totally unexpected, and it involves other people, if somebody comes into your life and causes trouble stirs up drama just puts your life upside down. And you make the choice that you know what a lie knows best. If somebody tells a blatant lie about you, and everyone is convinced by that lie, and you say and you're doing your best to defend yourself, you're doing your best to say hey, this is not the truth. This is what really happened. This is what really was said no one is taking your word. No one is believing the things that you say. And you

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decide to say to yourself, you know what, I'm just gonna wait, I'm just going to Allah is a witness on a loss of power will handle this. You have sovereign Jamil? So somebody when Jamil is you don't complain? You don't say anything, you don't do anything. You know that Allah is a cemetery bossier. You know, Allah is always watching. He's always listening. He's always monitoring the affairs of people. And so you trust that and you say to yourself, and you say to those involved, Allah will take care of this, I'm going to be patient. And another example of somebody and Jimmy and imagine if you have marriage issues, and you know you're being abused, you know, the trust is gone, you know

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that you are represented wrongfully, your spouse might be telling his or her family, your in laws, awful things about you. None of them are true, exaggerating, maybe mistakes or things that you might have said or done in the marriage. But the point is, he makes he or she makes you look like you're The Wolf of the pack. Like you're, you're the worst that anybody could be around. So the point is, they fabricate and exaggerate certain issues. And as a result, people look at you differently. people treat you differently, people act different about you, you become the scapegoat. Now you become the evil one, the bad one in the family. But you say to yourself, Allah is a witness.

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Although that's really difficult to live like that. You say to yourself, you make that personal decision. This is all part of Southern gymea. And our Prophet Allah, his salatu salam did teach us that the person who makes the choice of enduring pain and struggle for the sake of Allah, you make that choice, then Jenna awaits you. The ultimate goal and end is that paradise will be given to you. Again, it's not for everyone in the sense, not everybody can do that. At the end of the day, we as human beings, we want to be able to have our voices heard, represent ourselves, truthfully, we want to live a peaceful and normal life, even if that involves living with others. The point is, at the

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end of the day, you don't strive or you don't look for these moments. But for a believer, when these difficult times do happen, we make the best of it. And when you keep your full 100% trust in your Creator, that's somebody in German and that's what the APU Bala has selected and ultimately as you continue with the surah later on in the surah, Allah reunites Yaqoob alehissalaam with Yusuf Ali Salim, the story gets exposed the brothers eventually get confronted of their life. They come and they they confess to the Father, yeah, we made it up this is really what happened. We are sorry, will you ever forgive us and Yaqoob Allah His solemn forgives this his his sons, and even Yusuf Ali

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his solemn

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When he does eventually reunite with the brothers who did that to him, even he doesn't even say, well, it's you guys fall, look at the pain that you put me through, look at all the hardship I had to go through. I went from Palestine from where I was living now I'm in Egypt, I've been disconnected with my father for all these years, no one knew where I was. You guys did all of this to me, he doesn't do any of that. Instead of use of Harley, he salon blames their actions on shape on shaitan came and tempted you shaytaan influenced you, that is that those actions and those choices was from the west west or the influence of shouting, he doesn't even blame the brothers.

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Although, you know, just a practically or logically they do deserve some blame Yusuf Ali Salaam doesn't do that all of this encompasses beautiful patience. Now, here's the next point. Scholars divide patients into several categories. And each of them look at the subject very differently. So to start off, understanding what patience is and how to achieve it, you have to define it. And generally speaking, patience is defined as to restrain to control, you want to react, you want to react in an equal manner or even worse. So for example, somebody rubs you the wrong way. And you want to let them know that they've upset you, or they offended you or they've unhurt you in some

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way. But you don't go at their level, but you do respond and you respond in a proper civilized manner. You have patience, because you have every right to lose control, but you chose not to. So that's self restraint. That's what patience is. The second thing is islamically, or from from an Islamic perspective, is Lila. And what exactly is patience. And scholars have differed on this, there are several versions of how to describe this. And one of the more common ones is that somebody who is patient in the difficulties and the trials that Allah subhana wa Taala puts them through, that's one part of the definition. And secondly, they are patient to receiving and attaining the

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blessings and the rewards from their Creator. So your patient for the athlete, or maybe in this life, you really suffer and you really struggle, but you're patient because you know with that struggle. At the end, you will attain Bismillah Allah's blessings, Allah rewards. All of this income encompasses the definition of what patience is from an Islamic perspective. Then the scholars also divided into several categories, I'm going to read three of them to you of how patience is exemplified or shown in our lives. Number one, the scholars tell us it is with respect to blessings and virtues, which we've just mentioned. So one part of patience is that you are patient to receive

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the rewards of all the things that we say and we do. So yes, one classic example is prayer, you have to pray five times a day, bare minimum. And the first one starts off early in the morning before sunset, or sunrise, excuse me, right before sunrise. And that's really difficult to do you like when you tell non Muslims and others that Yeah, I wake up at four o'clock in the morning, I wet my limbs I perform that will do. And then I pray, I go up and down, I put my face to the ground, I do that whole prayer. And then I try to go back to sleep. They're shocked when they hear this. And then you tell them on top of that, yeah, I do that five times a day. That's even more of a shock five times a

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day you pray, but you keep doing it. And every believer, including me, and all of you, we all have our days when it comes to prayer, where it's difficult, it's you're tired, you're exhausted, whatever is going on in your life. And it's time for sada and you have to pause your entire life and go and pray. There are good days and bad days with this. But the point is you continue the effort you continue the struggle. So that's the first category. Why? Because you're yearning and you want the blessings and reward of your Creator subhanho wa Taala. The second category that scholars divide with respect to the subject of patience is

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in terms of achieving it, you act as if you have it already. And this is something that alioto the alignment tells us. So one of the ways to achieve patience is that you act as though you already have it. Pretend you literally have it in an alley or have the loved one says this and he actually mentions at the end. The reason why he says this is that normally when you pretend to be someone, you eventually become that person. It's rare that somebody pretends to be someone else, and they don't eventually become that person. And that's so true. So panela if you try to pretend to be

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Like somebody or act in a certain way, we're human beings, we can develop habits very quickly we can get used to things. That's the nature of how we're created. So I Lila Viola mind is saying that one of the ways to develop patience is to start acting like you have it. So you start pretending like you're really a patient person, although you're boiling inside, the frustration is stirring up from within. But you're holding it back, you're trying to you know, there's people around you. So you don't want to react, you don't want to say something and then regret it afterwards. That's the starting point. And eventually, what's going to happen is that you start developing the habit, wait

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a minute, patience does feel good. Patience does feel incredible. I feel more calm, I feel more relaxed, I worry less. So all of these things are the goals of why we're patient. Now, somebody asked me a long time ago, why do we need to be patient to begin with, you know, if we react, I mean, we react, that's it. I mean, if we hurt somebody, we get that we pay the consequences for hurting people. But at the end of the day, if I want to say something, I just want to say it, if I want to do something, I want to do it and bear the consequences. The answer to this why, why the need for patience is very simple. Because we have control over nothing. We don't know how the outcome of

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anything in life. So we make a decision. We have certain goals, we strive to achieve those goals. But we don't know at the end of the day, if we're ever going to receive that, or we're ever going to get there. So you're patient. So if you mess up in one area, or you don't get the you don't achieve the goals that you're striving for your patient, you keep trying, or you try a different method, or you turn your energy somewhere else. And last but not least, so we mentioned about afflictions, this is one type of patience, the obedience of Allah subhana wa Taala with respect to prayer, and so on, and so forth. Where we go through all of this, just recently, the day of autofair I'm sure a lot of

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you must have fasted. I heard from a few students that that was one of the hardest facets of their life that they have on offer. And I would say to them, we'll think about the reward. It's also one of the greatest rewards that we'll ever have an opportunity to attain, you know, to have all of your sins forgiven in the previous year, and all of the sins in the coming year. Because you fasted just one day, think of how many days of sins you committed in the previous year, and how many days and hours of sin you're going to commit in the coming year. But you just had that fast one day to get rid of all of that and have all of that forgiven. So Allah makes it worth it for us like you're

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going to have to work and strive if you want all that time and effort to be forgiven from the coming year as well as the previous year will this one day is going to count and just keep in mind that if you compare fast outside of Ramadan to the fast within normal time, there's no comparison because Allah says about the fast of Ramadan you read a lot who become we use Well, are you ready to be Comoros alone, once East for you, it doesn't want hardship for you. That's why it's a piece of cake. Too fast. In the month of Ramadan, you just get through it, you know, 29 to 30 days 1517 and 20 hours a day you're fasting, no food, no drink nothing. But it's a piece of cake. You just get

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through it every single day. Now you have to fast one day outside of Ramadan. And it's like the biggest hardship in in your life. That's the wisdom behind why and how we develop patience. You know, when you're fasting, you're looking at the watch, okay, I got three more hours left, two more hours, left half hour left five minutes, and then you're looking but you don't eat you don't you don't compromise your fast in any way. You have patience. So your patients in the obedience with Allah subhanho wa Taala. And the last and final point of one of the categories that scholars mentioned with respect to patience is guarding against sins. You protect yourself at the end of the

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day, you have every opportunity we all have every opportunity every single day to do whatever we want. Think about it, we have the the ability to make choices, and do you want I can make the choice to say and do whatever we want. But we don't. We don't do that. We keep ourselves disciplined to an extent. We follow the parameters that our religion set for us. So we don't let ourselves loose. And as a result of that, restrain that self control that discipline, you have patience, and Allah subhanho wa Taala blesses your life because you had the opportunity to do certain things, certain sins, but you stayed you stayed away. You know, you're sitting with your

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Colleagues for dinner. And after dinner, everybody's going to go hit the bar. Or if it's going to go to a club, or everybody's going to go back and party or waste, you know, just spend the rest of the night socializing and doing whatever. But your brain is already thinking, Man, look at the time, how am I going to wake up for fudger. So I need to get home and you excuse yourself from the table and you go home, because you're thinking about, I gotta get up for fudger, or I have a busy day tomorrow, or I gotta go see my kids, or I got to do this or do that. Or even, I don't feel comfortable where I am, you know, things are starting to get out of hand, I need to get out of the

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situation. And you do all of that. You do all of that. Because at the end of the day, you're protecting your Amen, you want to protect yourself, your life, your faith, when you do all of those things, this is a sign or these are signs that you have patience. And so with that being said, my brothers and sisters, I hope you can appreciate that. We didn't just sit here and just list all the blessings of patience. And just tell you, you have to have patience. Because the last thing I'm going to leave you with is something that we rarely talk about when we're talking about this subject. It's okay to lose your patience. What's not okay is to lose control when you lose your

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patience. So it's okay that you have a limit to your patience, all of us do. We all have that threshold. And when you cross that point, then you say, Well, you know what, enough is enough. Don't talk to me right now, or it turns into an argument or something. And I'm not saying that once you pass that point, you can argue now you can say whatever you want, it's a free card and just go for it. What I'm saying to you is that even our Prophet alayhi salatu was Salam got upset from time to time, even he sallallahu alayhi wa sallam became frustrated from time to time. prophets and messengers in the past have been tested this way. The companions are some of the greatest people

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that ever touched the ground. Even they lost patience, time to time, everybody has limitations. But what separates those who have those limitations, as opposed to those who can do have limitations, but they can still possess some sense of control, is what separates these two categories is you're a man you're a man keeps you under control. So even if you wish to speak up or to say something, or to do something, you do it with patience, you do it with a way that, okay, I'm not going to lose my tongue here, I'm not going to just let my tongue say whatever it wants, but I am going to say something, I am going to respond, I'm not going to sit here and take the abuse, I'm not going to sit

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here and be verbally abused, or emotionally, I'm not going to take that stuff. But I am going to respond. And I'm going to keep myself civilized and dignified. And so brothers and sisters, just keep in mind, one of the problems with this subject is that many cultures around the world present patience as though you have to take on all the abuse in life, you've got to welcome and accept pain after pain all the time. You know, if you make the personal choice to do that, then you'll be rewarded according a level Bless you, for that leg for being able to cope with those situations. But the reality is, most of us can't do that. We all have a limit. And that's okay, as well. It's how

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you react, and what you decide to do, and how you control yourself. When you do decide to react to a situation. That's what separates you from everyone else. And so with that being said, brothers and sisters, I pray that Allah subhanho wa Taala always and forever protects patients, in our hearts and in our lives. For the one who is patient is the most beautiful human being on Earth. When you have this quality, there is no creature on the planet that is in comparison to you. It is absolutely a remarkable quality in a human being. And even more so for a believer. Patience is one of the qualities on the Day of Judgment. But if Allah subhanho wa Taala chooses and he accepts it from you,

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then everything in your life will be good inshallah, your judgment process will also be good. That's what patients does, it has this ripple effect. If you're patient in life, then everything around you you can cope with it, you can handle it, and everybody's going to see and recognize man, you're really patient like you. I if that was me, I would have said something. If that was me, I would have punched the guy I would have reacted. But you just stood there and you just smile and you're like, Okay, no problem, whatever. Say whatever you want, do whatever you want. You know, that's incredible. People would admire and appreciate that. But again, again, the point is at the end of

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the day, it's all about self control. Right? It's not about just restraint and take all the 100

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You've been abused and just swallow it. No. So it's okay my brothers and sisters to react. But again, keep in mind, it's how we react. We are told that when we do react in hardship or in situations that are difficult or we're being tested, that we are taught in our religion, that there are ways to do that to keep yourself composed, dignified, and that at the end of the day, you don't escalate a situation and make it worse. So May Allah subhanho wa Taala continue to give us the strength that we keep ourselves under control. May Allah subhana wa tada give us the strength that we constantly improve and work on patience. And may Allah azzawajal reward us for it on the Day of

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Judgment. Mail lies so joke counters amongst the saw beauty and those who are patient for the saw beauty with they are guaranteed and blessed with a last panel with Arliss Jenna, and we ask Allah azza wa jal to give us his gender alone. I mean, just like below hate on everyone. Before you all go. Let's go into my box of treasures here. See what we have tomorrow.

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subpanel again, this stuff is just incredible is amazing how this happens. We're talking about patience. We're talking about Jenna, look, what tomorrow's tablet with a set of cue cards I just pulled out. It's called waffle agenda, the description of Jen soprano law. So that's what we have here for tomorrow, where you're going to be talking about the description of gender. And the way that this topic is going to go is we're going to talk about when the believer walks through the gates of paradise. What does he or she see? What are you surrounded with? What are the things that welcome you into paradise? What are the things that you're going to enjoy and appreciate when you're

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there? These are the things that we're going to talk about in sha Allah when we talk on this beautiful subject of Walsall, Jenna, the description of Paradise May Allah bless us with Jenna Milan so which will keep you all safe and healthy wherever you are, Till we meet again with sin Mr. alikum warahmatu Allahi wa barakato