Social and Family Conflicts 07 Misunderstandings

Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari

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Channel: Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari

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Bismillah in your Walkman you're walking

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through letter Ruffman Rahim

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hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah in Moodle who want to start you know who want to start a fiddle who want to study.

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When are older Billahi tarla Amin Shu Rudy and fusina woman say RTR Marina,

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Maria de la who further mobile Allah Who am a you boodle who follow the

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watershed Walla Isla Illallah who the hula shuriken or shadow in a you don't know heavy burner will sweat on our

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Mohammed bin Abdullah who Rasulo Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala Sayidina Muhammad wa early he put up in a poor hearing was her big mind or the coolamon TVR homebase CERN in illumi did Allahumma aluminum and found out one fan of him Island Turner was it and Subhanak Allahumma

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Cantera Alexandria Lima Hakeem all that

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respected brothers dear listeners, Salam o alaikum, Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh. I welcome all of you once again, to my daily talk and our daily discussion, my daily discourse on the topic of Family and Social disputes, causes and the solutions

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yesterday

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and the day before I discussed with you cause number six

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of family disputes, which was anger, and the solution, which I talked about was Sabha patience.

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Now we move on to cause number seven, actually, I intend to compete 10 till cachora Tune Kameelah

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go all the way to 10. So Inshallah, we don't have much days because I only speak and have this program Mondays to Thursdays. But inshallah we're moving on to seven. So I have seven, eight and nine and 10. Next, for more causes of

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family disputes, and the remedies the solutions, right? And inshallah I'm actually intending to maybe write a book on this topic as well based on these discourses, hopefully, insha Allah, Allah Allah, so moving on swiftly to cause number seven,

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our family disputes, what is causing number seven for family disputes.

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This what I'm going to talk about, and actually cause number seven, eight and nine, the next three causes are based on a particular Surah of the Quran, verses from a particular and a very important Surah of the Quran verses from a very important, extremely important Surah of the Quran, which is Surah gerat.

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And if you have time brothers and sisters that Surah for the sake of Allah really read it

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with understanding with the translation with explanation.

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And if you can go to a scholar and early and study that particular sudo with him then please do so. It's an amazing Surah Surah to rot

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in it Allah subhanahu wa ala talks about many different issues. It's a small short Surah many etiquettes the beginning of Surah there are verses here you can lead to per diem obeying the law he was really he was talking Allah when Allah similiarly Latina Amanullah swatter confer per assaulting EBU and hula hoop the whole trajectory but on the community

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and community

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beginning and open versus a political project, Allah subhanaw taala talks about the etiquette that the Muslims the Sahaba at that time, and the Muslims now have to have the other one etiquette towards the messenger of allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and they're after Allah Subhana Allah talks about mutual etiquette between Muslims themselves. So the etiquette and adab that the Muslims should have with other fellow Muslims within family and there are verses of social interaction versus that govern social interaction.

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And Allah subhanho wa Taala in that PETA Surah gives us guidelines gives us

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commands, guidelines and laws, it sets down laws

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that

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we must act upon. And he gives us guideline guidelines that if we act upon them, then Insha Allah we will be saved from all these family disputes and conflict and argumentation and quarrels, etc, etc.

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Surah kill Pajara pick it pick the Quran up brothers and sisters, open sort of the future right and read the next cause of family disputes, seven, eight and nine, the next three sorry, seven, eight and nine. They I have picked them up and I have extracted all these three causes the causes from verses of Surah puja.

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The first verse, the first the cause, and I'm going to talk about today.

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Allah Subhana Allah says, yah, yah ladina Manu in a conversation, this is verse number six of Surah Girod verse number six surah Taha Janata is an amazing Surah amazing Surah social etiquettes Allah gives us instructions and guidelines if you act upon them seriously and many of our problems will be avoided. So in certain verse number six, Allah says, You have Lavina Ave injure a confessor on the infinitive again and to Cebu Omen be Jaha letting photos bear who Alanna file to Nadine

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Subhan Allah an amazing an amazing and an extremely

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low our Lord and Creator Allah subhanaw taala sets down yeah you have ladina Manu Oh you who believe I will translate the verse verse first. And then inshallah I will elaborate. Yeah, you have ladina Manu Oh you who believe in a confessor own penerbitan letaba Yun, if a sinful person a first and the scar is actually explained that it's not only restricted to a sinful person, but a non responsible person

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comes to you with a noose. Never injure a confessor on be number a neighbor is a word in Arabic, which is similar to the term harbor. Harbor means news in Arabic as well.

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Never also means news like unmade Aluna and another ill RVM neighbor.

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And a young Bo a Nabi is also called an A B because of this meaning, because we know who your bureau

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and know who you are, and allow you to either, because he informs he gives news Nabhi so never means news, maybe is the informer who gives the news of the labor of the unseen. So Allah says injera confess upon being a burden. If a sinful person a non responding responsible person comes to you with some kind of news. Then what is the current What does Allah say? What is the command? What do we have to do? But the young,

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verified, verified,

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ascertain its truth, verify its correctness, make sure that it's true.

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research it, investigate, be careful and cautious. Take it with a pinch of salt, and verify its truthfulness and its correctness and its authenticity before doing anything before embarking upon anything. Allah says better by you, and to Cebu Omen be Johanna, so that you don't harm someone out of ignorance. You really didn't want to say something or you didn't really want to harm someone or really want didn't want to take an action. But because of this news, it was a false news. He wasn't authentic. It was a rumor for example, so that Allah says that verify who knew that a Yahoo and to see willkommen Bucha Harada out of ignorance you might harm someone, but this be who I learn to know

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the mean. And then you will become regretful you will become remorseful you will become so sorry and remorseful on what you have done.

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Amazing verse Surah, gerat of Surah gerat verse number 16. This verse tells us that one of the major and the next seventh major root for an cause for family disputes

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is misunderstandings. misunderstandings, many of our problems, brothers and sisters and dear listeners, many of our problems in the world. They occur because of misunderstandings, really many many of our problems that occur in

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The world because of misunderstanding, someone was trying to say something and they said something else. Sorry, you understood something else.

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Many of our problems are because of misunderstandings. So this verse of the Quran when Allah subhanaw taala talks about

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in general Converse upon being able to, in fact, have a yellow that when someone comes to the news verified, so today's discussion, and the sixth, the seventh sorry, cause that we're talking about a family dispute is misunderstandings, misconceptions, misunderstandings, and the remedy, the solution, the solution to this family, this cause, the solution to this cause is verification. It's verification.

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Amazing verse of the Quran.

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If we were to look brother and sister seriously, many of our problems in this day and age, the problems, the argumentation, the disputes within family members, within first cousins, between husband wife, that because of misunderstandings, many of our disputes, we could really avoid them. It's really a misunderstanding, seriously, it's a misunderstanding.

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And we just, you know, someone comes and tells us something, oh, she was, you know, saying this about you, without any intention of going and seeking the truth, and ascertaining the truth of the report.

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We take action, and then that results in extremely disastrous consequences.

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Really.

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Allah subhanho wa taala, in this verse is telling us that before you do anything, before you embark upon anything, before you rely, and you trust what this person is telling you, because this person may have been stood in a wrong way. If she if he says that, you know, I was with his brother, and he was saying some really bad things about you. Or when you're saying bad things about me, I knew Dalkey he's like this and he's like that and, and that person was probably not even saying anything about. Allah says, don't make a mistake like that. Don't trust and rely upon his report. Be careful, be cautious, be extremely vigilant.

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ascertain the truth of the report. Via Yahoo, the word W. The morpher saloon when they explain this word, they say that a battle that a battle W wn and data battle means verify its correctness. Be very careful. Make sure you know this verse actually, I'll tell you the background of this verse. And this if you look in the commentaries of the Quran, Tafseer of the Quran in order to be in his tafsir Jamelia, Tamil Quran and human him Luca theory history of Sierra and many other commentators they explain and they have mentioned the background what we call some of the new rules of this particular verse, that an incident took place. And I don't want to go into the detail because we

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have very short time, but an incident took place in the time of the messenger of allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

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Wherein, you know what happened there was a person who was the Sahaba, who embraced Islam by the name of Hadith binder. He was from the tribe of blue Mustafa, the rooster was a tribe. And

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the leader of the tribe has been the rod, whose daughter actually was the wife became the wife of the one of the wives of the messenger. salAllahu alayhi, wasallam. God a bit hairy. She's one of the Mothers of the Believers who had to nominate Mahatma minion woman named Joy Robin Hadith.

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Her father was the leader of Vanuatu Stella has been there or he accepted Islam embraced Islam. And he spoke with the messenger Salallahu Alaihe Salam, he came from far from his tribe, and he's and he embraced Islam. And then he said to the messages that Allah when he was telling him that I'm going back to my tribe, and you know what, I will give Dawa, I'll preach and I'll make people Muslims, and then I promised that inshallah they will also give this occurred, you know, the charity, annual charity, and when they became when they when they embrace Islam, because I'm the leader, so I will, you know, tell them to embrace Islam, and then I will regularly collect the Zakat and I will send

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you the circuit. So can you please You know, just send one of your your, you know, ambassadors to me, send one of your ambassadors to me on a particular given date. And I will make sure by that time I collect all the circuit from the people of my tribe, the Muslims, and deliver it to your to your ambassador. So the message is that Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, fine, no problem. They fixed the date. Now what happened?

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Based on that promise, how did Ben arrived when he went back? He preached Islam. Many as a leader of the new animal startup. Many people embraced Islam when the date came before the day

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He collected the Zakat of all the people and waited for the ambassador of the messenger Salallahu Salam, now the ambassador of the messenger Salallahu Alaihe Salam did not come on that date. So he became extremely scared. And he thought he was fearful if he thought maybe the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is displeased with me, something must have gone wrong, somebody must have said something to him. So otherwise, it's not possible for him. It's not out of his character to promise to send an ambassador by this given date and not sending him. So he actually was very scared. So he collected his pupil and he said, Look, let's go, let's all go and visit the messenger Salallahu

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Alaihe Salam, something must have gone wrong. And they went outside

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the you know, the village, and they were about to go to the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. On the other hand, the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam had already sent somebody by the name of Walid bin Akbar, Radi Allahu Anhu as an ambassador, to go to the tribe, and collect the Zakat. Walid bin Akbar, Radi Allahu anhu, he actually had some kind of, you know, his tribe in the days of ignorance. You know, in the olden days, his tribe had some kind of grievances and enmity with Balu and masala. So he was quite fearful. So he actually went as an ambassador of the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

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to collect zakat on behalf of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. But when he was on the way, and he saw from afar, that these people have come out from the village on the outskirts, he became fearful. And he thought, Oh, they've actually come to

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kill me or something. Because they know, you know, my tribe, and they, they've had this old enmity that I have to come out to, he turned back and came back to the messenger, salallahu Alaihe Salam, and said, you know, those people, you know, they're not, they're not willing to give the cart and you know, they want they want you to take my life. And actually, somebody came and told him something. When he was there, somebody said, You know what, I think they will come out to take your life. So he ran back. And he said, O Messenger of Allah, you know, they forget the card. I didn't collect the circuit phone, they did not want to give the circuit, they actually came to take my

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life.

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So the messenger sallallahu alayhi salam became extremely sad and angry. And he sent a group of Sahaba as a convoy, which he did in the leadership of Khalid bin al Walid Radi Allahu Anhu and said go and see what's happening. Khalid bin al Walid went and he sought they met the group of had it been around

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just outside the village and he said, they said, Why have you come for as as a whole group to fight us? said yeah, the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was given the news that you people will refuse your God and you came out to kill one of our ambassadors. They said stuff that Allah we've not even seen the ambassadors face. We were fearful that no ambassador has come and the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is upset from us. And we actually we've come out to actually what?

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Go to the messenger SallAllahu Allison and visit him and teach him that is anything wrong? Are you sad? Oh, you know, I displease farmers and is there a reason because of which, you know, nobody's come? I've been bullied said, well, the messenger SallAllahu Ellison's been told that, you know, you actually refused and you came to kill one of His ambassadors, and you had wrong intentions.

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Then all the truth came, you know, into the open and he said, Look, there's been some kind of misconception and this and that, upon this particular verse, Allah subhana, Allah revealed the following verse, he revealed the following command gave the following law, which was, yeah, you handle ADINA, I am and who in general confessor convener, but in general, Oh you who believe when a person non responsible person comes to you with a news.

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When a fossa a sinful person comes to the news, that but you ascertain its truth, truth, verify it, because you might do something that you may regret later on. And these misconceptions and misunderstandings brothers and sisters seriously contribute to many problems in our societies. Many you know, if we were lucky by Allah, I'm telling you, if we are careful, if we act upon this command, this know this, how come this injunction of Allah subhanaw taala we are very careful, we take everything with a pinch of salt. We verify the truthfulness and the correctness and the authenticity of everything what people say, we don't make hasty decisions. The messenger sallallahu

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alayhi wa sallam in a hadith he actually said,

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an atonement Allah will originate to ministry on an urgency to ministry upon that hastiness is actually from Chez Panisse from satan and earner to mean Allah, being calm and composed about your actions is actually from Allah Who SubhanaHu wa

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Hello. So we don't make hasty decisions, somebody came and said something before, you know, you just got the rage and pick up the phone, you think relax, you know, ascertain, you don't know whether it's true or not, if someone says makes a complaint about someone that you know, she was saying this about you or that person was saying this about you, he said this, she made this comment, then relax, take it easy, you know, go to the person in a nice way, say Look, brother, sister, and use has come to me has reached me than you were saying exactly. This isn't true. I doubt it. I don't think someone like you would say something like this for a fact, you know, because you're hungry, like I

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have personal burn about you good opinion about you. And that's actually our next topic that has not been but, you know, ascertain it Did you really say it and even if you have no problem, I am ready to forgive and forget for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala. But it just wants to know whether because you know, I don't want to have these bad thoughts about you, in my mind. So, you know, ascertain the truth, fullness off the off the report, and 90% of the time, really 90% of the time, 90 times out of 100 You know, you will realize that what was said to you was not really what that person said, misconceptions, misunderstandings, they create major problems in our communities.

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Misunderstandings create many problems in our communities. Because what happens when someone says something, and we believe it and we trust it, and there's a misunderstanding that it plays, then what happens is that we have negative thoughts and bad opinions about other people, then we start having hatred in the heart and enmity in the heart and then we'll back by it and then that person will say, okay, they set up this upon me they're backbiting and then that carries on, it results in you know, major destruction and enmities. And, you know, it could even lead to people being killed physical abuse in history, that's many, you know, so a lot of the times wars in history, if you look

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wars have taken place, because of misunderstandings really read the history.

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Even I mean, I don't have time, but even you know, some of those things that took place between the Sahaba Radi Allahu anhu, it was some of the hypocrites them on their own, they actually

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initiated that with a some kind of misunderstanding, a lot of the times it's misunderstanding.

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So, be very careful. Our seventh cause that we're looking at today, a family disputes, misunderstandings, solution is what Allah is saying to us in this verse of Surah gerat w the third boat verification make research before you know in every news every information that reaches you make research due to you know, verification of it.

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Verified.

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So, the and the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says in the Hadith

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that definitely Bill Murray Kevin and you had data be Colima Samia never had it in Allah but haram Alikum in Allah could Hara Aleikum, WA Opal uma hurt

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and he mentioned a few things Verily, Allah subhanaw taala has made such an things forbidden upon you. And then he says walk below Allah, that Allah subhanho wa Taala has made it below Acharya haram upon you.

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Be in our corner, you know what below economies, whatever a person he is, whatever a year I just related further without any verification. This is what we call a yellow color. GIF I will mark the Caribbean and you have data we call him a semi messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says it is enough it is sufficient for a person to become become a liar. It is enough and sufficient for a person to be considered a liar. Right?

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It is enough for him to be called a liar that he says to others, everything that he he is the messengers of Allah and even sent me saying And remember, you don't have to You're not only a liar. If you intentionally lie, it is enough for you to be a liar. You'll also be a liar, committing the sin of lying. If you tell others everything that falls in your ears, without verification, without ascertaining the truth. This actually is a person if I hear for example, someone say something to me and then I tell another person Oh, you know what I heard this. Without investigating without researching without ascertaining the truth, I would be considered a liar. This is the Hadith of the

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messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam gaffer Bill Murray Caribbean and you had this or be Colima Semia therefore, misunderstandings create a lot of problems in our societies and and in our communities, brothers and sisters, many problems that we find ourselves are because of misunderstandings. So just

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Be very careful solution is ascertain anything we do when when we hear a news when any information reaches us anything any information reaches us.

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Then before taking any action before saying anything to anyone,

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what do we do? First, make Babich research, first verify the truth of that news that report that statement, whatever that's reached you, then then do what you want to do. This is being precautious and vigilant. But the problem is we don't we don't do that.

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And because of that, we find many problems in the community. And to the point that sometimes we hear something, let alone being extremely careful. Somebody says, you know, what, have you heard of this organization? Spreading rumors, spreading rumors, you know, rumors, it's a major haram in Islam, a major haram, this organization, it's a money making organization, have you heard this this money? This? is an organization working for Islam, for example, any I'm not going to name names, but any exactly, you know, as an example.

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And that's it, someone said something that, have you heard that, you know, they they actually they make money, it's just a really, you know, money making organization. That's it without picking the phone up, going to them, asking them investigating verifying the truth, we tell someone else. And you know, what, what do we do, we actually add a bit more masala to it.

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Seriously, some people have this really bad, really bad habit, an extremely diseased habit, it's a disease, of relating information to others taking things from here, relating it there, adding the own extra bits, extra masala to, to the conversation to that statement.

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It was maybe initially it was something really minut and small.

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You know, it may even be something really small. But one person told the next the second one told the third one, the third one set to the fourth one. And then he went to the fifth one. It was passed on to the sixth one then was passed on to the seventh one, by the time it reaches the ninth person. It's literally completely different whatsoever from what the person initially said that what the first person made a statement was completely different from what the ninth person is now saying, This is what we call, you know, spreading rumors, which is a major hub. And we see you know, when it gets spread, and when it gets passed on to the next to the next person. This is what Allah subhanaw

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taala in this particular verse is saying that it's haram. It's a major haram which Allah subhanaw taala is talking about the W ascertain the truth, W before, let alone, you know saying it and relating it and passing it on to someone else as it is,

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let alone passing it on to someone else as it is.

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You have to ascertain the truth. But what do we do forget ascertaining the truth, let alone investigating and making sure it's correct. We pass it on with our own extra bit. And because of that, we find all the enmities and all the fights and all the corals and all the dislikes, and all the hatreds, and all the enmities that we find ourselves in, and all the killing and the murder that takes place on the face of the earth.

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We have really forgotten this amazing command of Islam, this obligation, we spread rumors, our societies are filled with rumors, who said this, and someone said that and someone said this, and she was whenever we hear anything from someone, if any one comes to us and tells us that this person was talking about you, it's very important, extremely important, especially when people are close to us, that we ascertain the truthfulness of that, you know, because if we don't, then we will have this hatred in the heart will have jealous in the heart will have this Adamawa would have these misunderstandings and evil thoughts about that person in the heart

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the job and the work the responsibility of a Muslim is that when someone comes to him complaining about someone else that he said this about you than his responsibility, the follow the aim is that he goes directly to the person and ask him

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really

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what do we do we don't even ask as I said, we add our extra bits with exaggeration

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exaggeration

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so this is a you know, extremely diseased situation that we find ourselves in

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that we don't we don't really, you know, we don't investigate, we don't investigate many of our, you know, fights and quarrels and disputes that take place within our communities is because of misunderstandings. Take any relationship brothers and sisters take any relationship.

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Mother in Law daughter in law relationship, for example,

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you know the mother in law may have

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even when even even if it's direct, there's a misunderstanding, she might be saying something else. She might be saying, you know, that you seem quite ill today and she's genuinely concerned or something or you should have taken some medicine.

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Or she, for example, spoke to her daughter that, you know, the daughter in law is quite weak, and she's not able to do a lot of work, isn't it? So I think we should give her some medicine.

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And then that misunderstanding that the daughter thought that, you know,

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she is complaining that she's very lazy. And she will come and tell her sister in law, that, you know, my mother thinks you're really lazy.

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Seriously, that happens. Now the mother in law actually said that she was quite ill. And she's, you know, quite weak. And she was probably

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quite authentic about what she was saying.

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She didn't have any ill intention behind what she was saying. She actually just spoke to her own daughter, that, you know, your sister in law looks quite ill and weak, and she doesn't have a lot of energy to work, etc. She was quite genuine about what she was saying. We should maybe take her to the doctor or something.

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But she came and told the daughter in law, my mom said, You're so lazy, you don't work. You don't work, you're lazy. That's it. Problem. massive problem. It's like a massive problem in the household. She straight away without doing anything. This daughter in law? What What will she do you know what she will do?

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She said, I'm lazy. She'll run up says

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go to a handbag, pick up a mobile phone, dial her mom.

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She starts crying and this and that. And then she will say, Mom, you know, I don't want to live here anymore. And I've had, I've had enough and I'm fed up with the lifestyle here. You know, I do this. And I do that. And I wake up in the morning and she still calls me lazy. And this and that. And, and you know, I've had enough of it. And I told you, you know this, this, this is not going to work and you know, such a control, control your mouth relax. We talked about the tongue. And I talked about you know, the tongue how we need to preserve it.

00:32:44--> 00:33:22

And I talked about, you know, anger yesterday as well. And I talked about how the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in the Hadith. I've never seen any good in this house. And this, you know, I work as a slave for her and for her son. She calls me lazy and the mother. Okay? Same thing. No, nobody's doing that. Nobody's researching nobody's ascertaining the truth. It was a responsibility of you, oh, daughter in law, that when your sister in law came and said this, take you with a pinch of salt. Relax. She's a woman. She must have said something. No, she must have understood wrong. She may not be listening properly. She may be half sleeping. She may be dreaming,

00:33:22--> 00:33:32

she might just be a dream that she seen. Jim, her mother in law might have told to her own mother might have said that to her in a dream. How do you know? Relax, take it easy, you know, to rush hurry.

00:33:33--> 00:33:36

Nothing's going to happen to you. Don't worry about it. Relax.

00:33:37--> 00:34:03

And then in the evening, relax. When you're with your mother in law says Mum sister was saying which is your sister in law, that you think that I don't really work? Am I a bit lazy? Like, is that true? She said no, no, I wasn't saying that. I'm not saying you're lazy. I was saying that. You know, you feel I've seen you for a few days. You're very weak and lethargic. You probably need some iron tablets. You need some something to build your energy

00:34:04--> 00:34:51

and a story and of matter. But no if you don't do that, and if you don't act upon this command of Allah, Allah subhanaw taala. In general Converse upon being a bit infected by urine. This W in its armor, Colossus photo, but you'll see a little armor in the Arabic language. Armor means a command. It's a law. It's a command that you must do it. Like a theme of Salah offer your Salah gives occur. It's a command, right? It's a command W verified. So you do not act upon that command of Allah. You are sinful and guilty. But look at the consequences in your own life without verification without going directly to your mother in law and asking her what your sister in law said. You directly took

00:34:51--> 00:34:59

action without verification. You ran upstairs and took your phone out and spoke directly to your mom. And he started crying and said all sorts of things. Then then

00:35:00--> 00:35:33

Look at your mum then your mum as well without investigations. She may be someone who acts upon this verse of the Quran Alhamdulillah and may Allah make all mothers like that not all totally knows and everyone like that I'm just giving an example. If she did she says if she does know about this verse, and she acts upon this what she will what will she do to say don't worry don't really like slim speak to her. I don't think she meant like that. I don't think she I don't think she will she called you lazy it's probably just a misunderstanding. Relax, relax, don't worry. And then you know after next day she'll phone how's everything how's things what's happening? And then it won't could

00:35:33--> 00:35:55

probably speak to her directly that you know, your daughter was actually telling my daughter that she has been lazy she lazy you know, maybe she is lazy, isn't it? She said no, of course not have ever said she's lazy. hamdulillah and of problem matter sorted. But if your mom as well is not acting upon this command of Sharia, then what will she do?

00:35:56--> 00:36:04

She'll take action as well, without verification. She called my daughter lazy, okay, you know what we're coming pack your bags, we'll take you home.

00:36:05--> 00:36:43

This is not the way Muslims behave. I'm going to tell you Dad and yes and the next man would take pack your bags and you know, this kind of story of matter and then it just creates problems that one misunderstanding led to next problem and the third problem and the fourth problem, eventually the marriage ends, children suffer, children are left with our parents, they suffer one misunderstanding, one non verification of a report led to the destruction of the family. Seriously, it leads to the destruction of the whole family.

00:36:44--> 00:36:52

As I said wars have taken place because of misunderstandings and not acting upon this command of Sharia.

00:36:54--> 00:37:18

Likewise, take any other scenario and the workplace. The boss said something to one of his workers. And he went and said to the other co worker, go and investigate. Go and do w in the third book, the third book and W in the been very thick verification. verify the authenticity.

00:37:19--> 00:37:36

Even in a parents children relationship. Your brother or your sister your sibling might say something to the you know dad that really hates you. He told me he hates you. Or Mum Mum Mum saying he she really doesn't like you. She thinks you're the worst child she's ever had or something like that.

00:37:38--> 00:37:42

Or if you're married, you know your sibling comes to you and said, Look, Mom was saying that you're just you just

00:37:44--> 00:37:46

you know, you do everything for a wife, but you don't care about your mom.

00:37:48--> 00:38:10

Now, rather than embarking upon something and making a hasty decision or acting upon this report or doing something, relax, that's the first thing we need to do. Relax. Take a calm breath. Have a cup of glass of water, cold water. That's if you're not fasting, don't don't take a glass of water right now.

00:38:11--> 00:38:31

If you're not fasting and take a glass of water, take it easy. Relax. Think about it. Think about it. First, let your mind you know the problem that one of the problems in our communities is that we do a lot of things without using our brains and minds. We don't let our minds do any work. All our work is done by our hands and our feet and our mouths.

00:38:32--> 00:38:37

Before any of these parts, these parts of our bodies

00:38:38--> 00:38:52

do anything. Before our hands come into action. Before our feet come into action. Before our mouth especially the tongue starts moving. You should first use our brain.

00:38:53--> 00:39:14

We don't use our brains we don't think a couple of minutes think remember the other day What did I mention? So you do the Imam Shafi out of the Allahu Anhu the great humor when someone would come and speak to him. He would not respond. He would look down for a minute or two and then respond. Somebody asked him Imam Shafi about the Allahu Anhu somebody asked him and said Oh Imam.

00:39:16--> 00:39:35

Why don't you respond straightaway? What takes you so long? When you look down and then after two minutes you respond? And someone asks you a question when someone speaks to you, you think for like two minutes and then you respond. Why do you do that? He said had the river had the river.

00:39:36--> 00:39:39

And the Hira, Phil Calamy OfficeSuite.

00:39:41--> 00:39:46

Had the river and they'll hire Phil Calamy OfficeSuite so that I know

00:39:47--> 00:39:59

so that I know whether it's better for me to speak or remain quiet. So you're using your brain before before doing anything we must use

00:40:00--> 00:40:06

is our brain and this this verse of the Quran I mentioned the Cebu Newzoo you know the incident behind it between

00:40:07--> 00:40:14

Hadith Bynder R and Walid bin Akbar, this misunderstanding that took place

00:40:15--> 00:40:23

because of which Allah subhanaw taala revealed this verse, this amazing, an extremely important verse and command.

00:40:24--> 00:40:44

And that, that tells us that we must be very careful when we pass on information to others. Some of us unfortunately, especially this happens a lot in the Asian community. I have to say this, I'm part of the Asian community. So I don't feel anything wrong that I should say this. But it happens a lot in our Asian communities.

00:40:46--> 00:40:51

We have this really bad disease of what we call in our own language, punchcard,

00:40:52--> 00:40:54

inverted commas.

00:40:55--> 00:41:06

It's a very bad habit. Sometimes we don't think there's anything wrong with it. It's haram, according to Islam. We don't even think Islam has anything to do with it.

00:41:07--> 00:41:35

Islam has everything to do with it. A few people sit down, and gossip and gossip and gossip, spread rumors, and talk about the whole world. They were doing this and she was doing that. And she was doing this and he was doing this. Concentrate on your own life brother, sister, the one who is Oberlin and Shala? Who are you going Oh, you'll be nurse, the one who is concerned about his or herself. We'll never have time we'll never find time to think and talk about other people.

00:41:36--> 00:41:37

Really,

00:41:38--> 00:41:47

the one who is extremely ill and sick. A person who has cancer will have no time to think about somebody's headache.

00:41:49--> 00:42:01

If we think we have hives, and we all do, we're all sinful, we won't have time to sit there and gossip and do inverted commas punchcard. This is a problem in our community, especially the Asian communities.

00:42:02--> 00:42:18

It's just that we like to sit and gossip and then relayed information and spread rumors. And as I said, add our own bits, to all the conversations, small things that end up becoming major issues of the community.

00:42:22--> 00:42:31

When we hear someone said something, and this happens in religious matters as well, you heard someone said something in a talk, or you know, this molar and the chef said this is to

00:42:33--> 00:43:06

relax, don't tell anyone. First go speak to him, go and visit him. Give him a phone call. Did you really say this? Sometimes someone asks a shift a question. And he responds he misunderstood related to someone else that someone else turns on else. And it goes on and on and on. And you know, it's like people adding their own stuff to it. And at the end of the day, than 12 person who received that information, while he received 100 degree different from what the actual chef said

00:43:08--> 00:43:10

seriously, and that's actually happened.

00:43:11--> 00:43:16

One of my teachers will sit down with me having the hula he mentioned the story, he talks about his own stuff.

00:43:18--> 00:43:20

That once you know, somebody asked him

00:43:21--> 00:43:22

a question

00:43:24--> 00:43:32

that if you listen to the Quran, which is played on the radio, for example on this, you know, a recorded

00:43:33--> 00:44:18

Quran is recorded whether it's on a radio or a cassette player, if you listen to it, do receive reward. So he responded and he said Insha Allah, yes, it is hoped from the Rama from the Mercy of Allah subhanaw taala that if a person listens to recorded Quran, he will get the reward however, it is still better. This is what he said. It is still more virtuous and there's more reward in listening to live Quran. So somebody asked him a question. But if you listen to the Quran, which is recorded and it's played, do you get the reward? He said, Yes, it is hoped from the Rama and mercy of Allah, that you will get rewarded Insha Allah, but to listen to the Quran, live from someone,

00:44:18--> 00:44:28

there's more reward. That's, that's it. That's what he said only. That's it. Now that person told the second person the second one went and passed on that information to the third individual.

00:44:30--> 00:45:00

The third individual passed it on to the fourth one, the fourth one passed it on to the fifth one, the fifth one to the sixth one and Paragon and Peridot. And then chef Duckworth nearly half of the whole law says that one day I received a letter a massive letter. Somebody said O'Shea, I was in some other city of of Pakistan. I was sitting in the talk. I attended a talk given by such and such chef in his talk in Joomla when he was good

00:45:00--> 00:45:17

During his lecture, he quoted you, and you said and he quoted you saying and he said that Chef Dr. Osmani says that listening to the Quran on a tape recorder on a cassette player, or recorded on is similar to listening to an awful music.

00:45:20--> 00:45:37

Shafi said that I told him that you know what, forget me saying that even even my angels you know, the Quran and Katie been sitting on my shoulders, they've probably never heard of this, they don't even know of this. He only said that, you know, it's actually more rewarding listening to the Quran

00:45:39--> 00:45:48

live and the news ended up being that he said, The listen to the Quran on a recordings like listening to music

00:45:49--> 00:45:56

that happens in our communities. We just spread rumors and information without any verification.

00:45:58--> 00:46:11

We you know, we should be such brothers and sisters. We should think Allah says in the Quran, nah, yo Fulldome in bowling ille de here, even I did, every statement, every phrase every

00:46:13--> 00:47:05

pronouncement, every word, every statement that comes out from our mouths with an angel recording it, we should have this conscious, we should realize this, this fact everything that comes out from my mouth, anything that we do, whatever we write, any letter word we write, if we are writing an article, or every statement that we make, we should first think that you know what, I will have to prove, I will have to justify, I will have to justify this statement or this writing in the court of Allah subhanaw taala Imagine you're sitting on a conversation, right? Right now, for example, I know I have loads of people listening to me. I'm careful about the words that are coming out from my

00:47:05--> 00:47:17

mouth because I known hundreds of people are listening to me. Imagine you're sitting somewhere and someone says to you, okay, start talking. And we have some Cid Cid is recording everything is being recorded your conversation?

00:47:19--> 00:47:21

How careful will will we be

00:47:22--> 00:47:28

will be extremely cautious and vigilant. And make sure that not even one word or letter

00:47:30--> 00:47:39

comes out from our mouths that come back to haunt us later on. We'll be extremely careful, seriously, we'll be extremely careful.

00:47:41--> 00:47:50

If that's the case, in this world, what about the aka the court of Allah subhanho wa Taala either the court of Allah subhanho wa taala.

00:47:51--> 00:47:56

Every word, every statement will need to justify

00:47:57--> 00:48:00

every word in every state and will need to justify

00:48:01--> 00:48:03

in the quarter of Allah subhanaw With the island.

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So don't make hasty decisions. Don't spread rumors, and act upon his verse of the Quran, make, you know, be extremely careful and cautious.

00:48:15--> 00:48:27

Always verify the authenticity of a report. And if we do that Inshallah, many of our problems will be solved. So think about it in your own life.

00:48:28--> 00:48:37

Look at the problems that are created within your own family, the disputes, many of them are really to do with misunderstandings.

00:48:38--> 00:48:44

Sometimes when you're debating when you're arguing with someone, you actually both of you agree upon

00:48:46--> 00:48:51

one central point, but you're both disagreeing on something because of looking at it from two different angles.

00:48:52--> 00:48:56

Seriously, many of our disputes are of this nature.

00:48:58--> 00:49:08

One person argue with you because he's saying this is using No, no, but you're looking at it from one angle. And he's looking at from another angle, the central point you both agree upon.

00:49:09--> 00:49:15

I can mention this famous incident story. There were four five blind people. They were all taken to visit a

00:49:17--> 00:49:46

elephant. They all felt the elephant elephant. One felt the tusk of the elephant. The other one felt the back. The other one felt the foot. When they came back. Somebody asked them how does an elephant feel like they never saw it. They were blind once said, you know, rock solid, it's like a metal like a stone. Because he you know, felt the test of the elephant or the stereo is very, you know, like chubby and fatty.

00:49:47--> 00:49:52

Every one you know all of them. They were all describing the elephant in a different way.

00:49:55--> 00:50:00

But there was no disagreement because they all felt different parts of the elephant

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it likewise when sometimes are argumentations people are looking at the issue from different angles from different viewpoints and Islamically as well many of our external effort many of the differences of opinion that take place between the different sects and the different schools of thought and different backgrounds whatever the I don't want to use the names of all Muslim when Allah says was a makan Muslim in

00:50:25--> 00:50:29

your cognitive Have you heard we call ourselves Muslims first and foremost

00:50:30--> 00:50:39

many of these differences that we find ourselves in and find Muslims in and and you know different sects being created.

00:50:40--> 00:51:12

If you look deep and in reality, seriously, you will find that the central point is agreed upon by all the parties. It's just how you look at it. Look within your families as well. Many disputes could be avoided because of misconceptions and misunderstandings, many disputes can be avoided because I'm understanding. So this particular verse of the Quran that we really need to act upon. And the sixth cause misunderstandings and myths, conceptions.

00:51:13--> 00:51:42

What is the solution? Be extremely careful, be vigilant act upon the verse of the Quran, which is the bead and the third boat, your your Ludhiana airman who injure a confessor on Minerva, inflatable yellow, and to Cebu, Oman. Bucha hurtin for those of you who identify as demean that verify the authenticity of the report, and Insha Allah, if we do so, many of our disputes that we find ourselves in will be avoided.

00:51:44--> 00:51:56

So that was cause number seven, and the solution that we talked about today, Inshallah, as I said, the cause eight and cause nine that we're going to be talking about, are taken from silicon Pajara.

00:51:58--> 00:52:35

In the following few verses, and then we'll have cause number 10 We pray that Allah subhanaw taala accept our efforts and that we benefit love subhanaw taala grant me the ability, the Tofik to act upon what I say, and grant all of you that don't feel because we have to implement all of this. Remember, all of this is not just for entertainment, radio is not for entertainment, it's to better our lives, not just to entertain ourselves and just you know, relax in the month of Ramadan. It's to better our lives we learn something from it, so that our lives are better in this world and the next world so really act upon these things Inshallah, bring them apart in your lives and pray to Allah

00:52:35--> 00:52:51

subhanaw taala to guide me to guide yourself and the whole of mankind of the whole whole of humanity. Allah subhanaw taala except our fasting LCM Allah Yama Wattana we are Sol Allahu wa salam ala you didn't know Mohammed? Salim medica. He means