Masculinity – Level Infinity

Mohammad Elshinawy

Date:

Channel: Mohammad Elshinawy

File Size: 18.63MB

Share Page
AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Therefore, no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

AI Generated Transcript ©


00:00:09--> 00:00:11

Just like with every other subject,

00:00:13--> 00:00:59

the anarchy or chaos of the gender debates nowadays is yet another opportunity, a ripe opportunity to appreciate how Islam has the perfect solution for every dilemma mankind will ever face. You know, everyone speaks about gender equality. And then the Quranic or Islamic narrative says, Actually, you're overlooking something, there is a superior notion known as gender equity. You know, Islam recognizes men and women as equal, it does that in that they're equally human. Right? They're equally dignified. They're equally inviolable, you can't violate a woman the same exact way you can violate the man. They're equally

00:01:00--> 00:01:39

purposeful, we are all created the same perfect purpose to devote our lives to Almighty God, we are equally given the opportunity to race for the highest ranks of paradise. So the most important things, equality is there. But then Islam says, Wait, there are some differences, and it would be unfair to overlook them. And so part of fairness equity to both parties is to recognize the unique strengths and the unique contributions of each gender. That's why, for example, Islam says, Your mother than your mother than your mother than your father, why

00:01:40--> 00:01:49

does the mother deserve in full fairness, three times as much kindness, because she's been more kind and compassionate with you than anybody else.

00:01:50--> 00:02:02

She was more empathic. She carried you all by herself. And she delivered you all by herself. And she nursed you pretty much all by herself, then the rest of us got involved.

00:02:03--> 00:02:27

And so it is perfect fairness, perfect justice. And if we don't celebrate the unique contributions of each gender, the way Islam taught us to, then the drilling outside of the other narrative, will cause each gender to become dissatisfied with their unique distinct strength and skill and contribution.

00:02:28--> 00:03:11

Even if we were the Sahaba, the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, this is not just like a risk of the modern times, even if it may be so prevalent now. Because even among the Sahaba, you have someone like as smart Vinci as even a second on Saudi Arabia, who was a brave, articulate woman. Known for many accolades. They say that during the Battle of a yarmulke against the Byzantines, well, after the prophets death, she took out nine men with the pole of her tent when the tent was overrun, like the medical tent, the aid tent, she took them all out, she finished them. But during the time of the Prophet sallallahu, alayhi wasallam. There's a famous incident regarding

00:03:11--> 00:03:27

this discussion of gender equity. She says, Yeah, Rasul Allah, Allah sent you to both the men and the women, and we believed in you, and we believed in your Lord. So where now is our share of the reward? Because we are homebound.

00:03:29--> 00:04:08

We are make ourselves available for our husbands, we bear their children for them. While they are outside, they get to attend Joomla meaning more often than us because women are allowed to attend Joomla Of course, right? They get to attend Joomla they attend the gym at the congregation. They get to visit the sick meeting more often they get to attend the Jenna is the funeral processions, we have more limitations than them, they get to perform hajj, she said they get to perform Omura and above all, they get to perform jihad to fight in the path of God sacrifice their lives. So of course all the companions are listed in like Whoa, look at how this woman can really make a case. How

00:04:08--> 00:04:09

articulate how confident

00:04:11--> 00:04:24

and so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to her, Listen to me carefully, and take communicate this message back to all of the women whom you represent, you are their spokesperson, take this back to them

00:04:25--> 00:04:59

that you are fulfilling with excellence your wifely duties, right? And you being keen on taking care of your family and pleasing your husband will get you the reward of all of that everything that guys are doing outside. So she said all of that. All of that. She turned around and walked away saying Allahu Akbar, God is great, great in his justice, great in its fairness, right? God is great. God is great. La ilaha illa Allah she kept saying, there is no God but Allah, Allah is the true God. He's

00:05:00--> 00:05:02

equity is befitting of His greatness. it all lines up.

00:05:05--> 00:05:23

You know, and you should also appreciate why is it that this function that a woman may serve when homebound is equal to the same reward as Juma and Gemma on visiting the sick and the Janaza and Hajj and Umrah and Jihad and why all that, because would it actually be possible

00:05:25--> 00:05:41

for the men to be out and about serving in that way in society and in the world, if their homes were not anchored by the sacrifice of their partners, it would not have been possible. Therefore it is perfect equity, perfect justice that they partake in the reward as well.

00:05:42--> 00:06:01

Then there's another Hadith, the Hadith, Abu Hurayrah, the Allahu Anh, where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to the men now, he said, the money you spend on freeing asleep Majan giving someone their freedom emancipating a slave, and the money you spend on feeding a needy person, someone who's hungry, feeding a needy person.

00:06:02--> 00:06:18

And the money you spend to sponsor a campaign fighting in the path of Allah. He says and the money you spend on your family, a Vamo had you run, the one that has the most reward is the money you spent on your family?

00:06:20--> 00:06:20

How?

00:06:22--> 00:06:36

Well he said so Salallahu Alaihe Salam, it's such a great reward. But why? Because it's equity. Think about it. Number one, spending on your family is a personal duty. If you don't do it, nobody's gonna do it. Right.

00:06:37--> 00:07:20

Number two, because it's a personal duty, it's less visible to the outside world. When you do do it. You're not going to be very appreciated. Like you spent in the past year on your family. Oh, man, maybe 50 maybe 100, maybe $200,000. You've never spent that much in a fundraiser. But still that money behind closed doors. No one's gonna tell you to COVID Allahu Akbar, may Allah bless your health and your wealth Brother, no one's gonna do that. So Allah azza wa jal wants the homes to remain invested in by the men and the women. These are the building blocks of a healthy society. So he's saying, I appreciate you for the world doesn't I appreciate you? The world doesn't see it, I

00:07:20--> 00:07:20

see it.

00:07:22--> 00:07:44

But to be very honest and fair, there is a missing puzzle piece to this in the hadith of asthma, and the Hadith of Abu Hurayrah. Right, what's in it for us, we get the same reward and then the money I spent on my family is the most reward that will only be motivation enough for someone who's actually looking for reward for looking for Allah's approval. Right?

00:07:45--> 00:08:25

They were satisfied with Oh, I get that reward. i They embrace that they welcome that. But if Allah's pleasure is not the mission of your life, is not the priority for you, then that'd be like not so what if I get the same reward, I want the same celebrity, I want the same credit in the eyes of the people. And that is why fixing the relationship with Allah lies at the core of fixing any other relationship, even fixing your relationship with yourself, even your own self image, your own self confidence. But if you are able to be that person that Allah's pleasure and the reward of the Hereafter is your number one priority.

00:08:27--> 00:08:40

Not only will these incentives keep you going, but also you will realize that it's actually the only thing possible is to get Allah's approval. The people's approval is impossible, who has ever been approved of by everybody?

00:08:41--> 00:09:22

And then you just not even the Prophet alayhi salatu salam, not even Allah Himself, people debate about God, right, so you think you're gonna get it. So focus on what's possible. And when you seek out Allah's pleasure, things become very simple in life, things become very clear. Even in this gender discussion, not only is Allah gonna be approving of me, but also for my sanity, I actually know what it looks like to do the right thing. You see the gender role debates nowadays, deflate people, it's so discouraging because I'm always being accused by somebody or some group, that I'm brainwashed that I'm underperforming that I'm not living up to. I'm so backwards or Eastern or

00:09:22--> 00:09:25

Western or old school or whatever it may be.

00:09:27--> 00:09:30

But when you seek Allah's pleasure, it's right there in the Quran.

00:09:32--> 00:09:40

You know, and because the bulk of those who attend gym or because it is mandatory on us, is the males I will spend the rest of the football speaking to the males in particular.

00:09:41--> 00:09:46

Do we have clarity on what masculinity is chronically absolutely

00:09:47--> 00:09:59

meaning meaning that each add on so to whom I had Allah Holly among humanity are true men. The praise here is the quality of course not just the biological

00:10:00--> 00:10:36

condition but true men the context is praise that what that kept true to their contract their covenant with God. And then you speak about on the interpersonal level I'll share with you too I bet that gives you such transparency on what I'm supposed to be doing here. How am I supposed to be thinking about this one? ayah Allah says Regera loco Munna Allah Nisa. Men are the maintainers of women are the caretakers of women. Case clothes, right? I am responsible financially for my family. That's a part of it. That's a part of my responsibility.

00:10:37--> 00:10:41

I'm also responsible to protect my family physically,

00:10:42--> 00:11:11

clarity, that means I have to be to have the strength of body right, have strength of will, right courage, I have to accept this. This is my duty in life, to protect my family. And also I have to maintain my family in terms of guiding them morally, I have to make those decisions. That doesn't mean micromanagement. That means being sort of the moral guide, the North Star being the one who moves it in the direction of safety in the direction of Allah's pleasure and His mercy subhanho wa taala.

00:11:14--> 00:11:59

And that's who I will embrace because it's the work of the prophets. I'm honored with my family and beyond the other I was actually given by Sofia Anna Maria Anna Rahima. Hola, though, the word manliness is not there. The way he understood this idea was so insightful. So if you didn't already know one of the earliest greatest Quran scholars, when they asked him where is masculinity? Where is manliness in the Quran? He said it is in the statement in surah. Al are off when Allah azza wa jal was speaking to the greatest man and the greatest model for manliness and humanity speaking to the Prophet SAW Selim and he said to him, defining it for us through him who the law FHWA what more Bill

00:11:59--> 00:12:17

Murphy, what I read and Jacqueline, take what is available if was like forgiveness, right, take what they allow you to take meaning see the opportunities that are available, right, and be an agent of positive change in the world.

00:12:18--> 00:12:35

That means a man is not allowed to feel powerless to resign to that a man is not allowed even to be oblivious to not know what I'm supposed to be doing. You gotta look for every available opportunity to influence the world in positive ways. Beginning with those closest to you that's your job, who then

00:12:36--> 00:13:19

there are ways we can better ourselves and better our family, better our self esteem and that have our loved ones today before tomorrow, but we might be oblivious. And also take what is available in that as an indication that you need to be gradual and gentle, not forceful, take what's available, don't be lazy. And so just haste in hasty ways. Go home and try to tear it down after the whole book. Right? That's part of being a man. Laziness caused you to be rash, many times impatience, lack of self control, self discipline, take what is available, be be goal oriented, but calculated. Then he said those three phrases in that verse on melanin manliness, he said, What motivated my roof and

00:13:19--> 00:13:36

constantly be a promoter of goodness, that means leading by example. That means educating the world on goodness, that means encouraging the world to embody what they know to be good, all of it, you are an enjoyer, a promoter of goodness, divinely dictated goodness.

00:13:37--> 00:13:40

And the third of them, he said, well out of the 100 jehlen.

00:13:42--> 00:13:46

And ignore the foolish part of the burden of leadership

00:13:47--> 00:13:48

is criticism.

00:13:49--> 00:13:51

You're gonna get a lot of criticism.

00:13:52--> 00:14:18

Right? If you're appeasing everyone, that means you don't really stand for anything. Right? You haven't really done anything you just made everyone feel like they're totally fine. Even if they're going to hell. You made them look forward to the trip. How many? That is cowardice? That is selfishness. Out of analgesia hidden means, yes, hear feedback, listen to advice, but you're going to ignore criticism. You're going to be bent on your mission,

00:14:19--> 00:14:22

to do the good work to fight the good fights.

00:14:23--> 00:14:52

You're not going to be spiteful. You're not going to be jaded by them. You're also not going to be deflated by them. You're going to be a man of strength. And as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Lisa Shaadi double surah. The man that has real strength is not the one that can physically out wrestle others. That is a form of strength. That's not real strength. Well, that keenness Shadi them and the M liquid F cell, the one the strong person is the one that has self control. And he gave the example of anger like in the times when you're angry.

00:14:53--> 00:14:59

And so the male will make the tough decisions the man not the male should I say right well out of and they're going to

00:15:00--> 00:15:13

Ignore the noise. And so I want to say in light of those ayat, right, men are the maintainers here and take what's available and enjoying what is good and ignore the critics. If you embrace that

00:15:14--> 00:15:52

Quranic definition of leading, seeking to lead seeking to be a force for good, then you are more manly. See how clear this is it you are more manly, then the whole world that doesn't think so. You're infinitely more masculine than those who don't know the definition of masculinity, or have shallow definitions of masculinity. People think masculinity today is you know, selling your body on the internet to really you know, what kind of muscle mass I can take a photo of at the right angle within a bathroom. That's masculinity. That's selling your body that's what it is.

00:15:53--> 00:16:03

Or masculinity may be in some times and places how many children I can produce, or how much wealth I can amass Allah has reserved, you are diluted for thinking so

00:16:04--> 00:16:15

and some of the most corrupt think that an accomplishment is for them to outdo others in the amount of women they can deceive and supposedly attract. In passing.

00:16:16--> 00:16:26

You are infinitely more masculine than all of them because you're committed to the Quranic clarity. May we be of those people Allahumma Amin of kala kala has our start for Allah Allah Emily welcome.

00:16:33--> 00:16:41

hamdu Lillahi wa salatu salam ala moana Viva Chateau La ilaha illallah, who had the hula Shadi killer who assured the unknown Mohammed Abdullah, who whenever you who are pseudo,

00:16:45--> 00:16:46

today and forever.

00:16:48--> 00:17:31

We as Muslims need to remember that only Islam can fix things in a wholesome way. Only Islam can reinstate in the world men that have that clarity and confidence that can create also men save the world, you know from men that are strong, but take advantage of others because of their strength, or save the world from men that are weak and cannot lead and effect positive change in those around them and in themselves. Only Islam can produce men and women that are upright parents that will not subject their kids to Lifetime's of suffering because They bicker like children, these parents write only Islam can save us from all of that, and every other dilemma that may arise. But that is not by

00:17:31--> 00:17:49

hearing a whole lot about it here. And now this is a lifelong project to reacquaint ourselves with the Islamic worldview, to transcend these Gender Wars that could finish off humanity worse than any World War can. But also it requires systematic, systematic building.

00:17:50--> 00:18:12

What I mean is, you know, again, speaking to our brothers, there being healthy friendships between males, healthy male networks, where we share experiences and bond with each other and realize we're not alone in this the same way our women feel overwhelmed we to feel overwhelmed by this unnatural dynamic of modern life, even places where we can be more physically active and physically fit.

00:18:13--> 00:18:24

You know, the bottled up newness of it is just one of the many problems of the blurring of the lines. And it's one of the reasons why suicide is three times more prevalent among males today than females,

00:18:25--> 00:18:27

at least in United States.

00:18:28--> 00:19:12

And ultimately and I close with this, this also requires part of the systematic solution is message it presents because this challenge a huge part of it is the fact that the village life is gone. I don't mean the primitive nature of the village life, I mean the support system, the extended family systems in village life, once we realize the need and how necessary these changes are, you start carrying the load for each other so that we can all get better. May Allah azza wa jal make us an obvious evident model for the solution that US and the world needs say I mean, may Allah subhanho wa Taala help us be agents of positive change the men and women amongst us Allah whom I mean, may we be

00:19:12--> 00:19:25

not sucked into wars that are not ours. And misguidance that we already have the cure from in our hands, may it settle in our hearts and produce the best for us and this in this world and the next Allahumma Amin and Finland are hung out Obinna