Marriage 08 Wifes Rights Upon Husbands Part 1

Karim Abuzaid


Channel: Karim Abuzaid


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AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the qualities of a man in charge of a family, emphasizing the importance of sincerity, being an OSHA-compliant person, being mindful of one's family, respecting their emotions, and not giving up on one's family. They stress the need for everyone to be humble, considerate, and be mindful of their own families. The importance of praying for others and not just oneself is emphasized.
Transcript ©
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In hamdulillah

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Mohammed who want to know when to stop

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when I would we let him in Sharon fusina amin say Dr. Molina

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Manya de la who follow Malala

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Fela dlF

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Illa la wahoo luxury gala,

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Chateau Mohammedan Otto who are a solo brothers and sisters in Islam Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

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This is lecture number eight from the series love, marriage and divorce. Like we always say the name is just for the attraction but we're really talking about

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something that is the oma

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is desperately needing

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reforming our families.

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Because the family is the first brick in the community.

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And if the family is sound and healthy, that means the community will be sound and healthy. And also

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I think this is the most important piece, we will have future generations of Muslims who are healthy.

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And the last lecture we this we discussed a very important rather crucial, crucial issue, which is Lee manual kawana

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who is in charge of the family. And we mentioned one way or another that Min De Nina, it is part of our religion that we must have a leader for a group of people beginning with three,

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three and more. You must have an ear

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you must have somebody in charge, like a ship, that you need a captain to manage the ship. The same exact thing in every other aspects of our lives. Look at the Salah. We must have one person to be identified to be the Imam, someone who leads

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by but again, it doesn't mean that this person is privileged or he's being honored. Rather these things normally come with responsibilities. The same exact thing once it came to the family,

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Allah subhana wa tada identified the man to be the leader

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identified the man to be the head

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to be the image of the family.

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But again, Allah subhana wa tada is not pre feeding the man over the women. Absolutely not rather Allah subhanaw taala is placing responsibilities, more responsibilities, basically, on the man

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being the head and we mentioned and discussed Yes, sir. Last lecture, the importance for our sisters to submit to this

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sisters, Muslim women right now they go after the media and after the people who really want the destruction of the Muslim family because they know this is the key to the success of the Muslim mom at large. And they go after these turns in quality and Islam is bad to women and stuff like that. No. Look at the criteria on which Allah subhana wa tada bees that leadership when he pleased that leadership in the sight of the man Allah subhana wa tada says, and region Muna Nisa Bhima de la Allahu Allahu malaba. Men are the protector, the Sustainer of women, the provider in charge of women, you can use so many English words to explain that we're Alcoa why, because of the way that he

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fashioned them so pinata, the US little kilka from the get go. Allah given the man certain qualities, more than the women to serve that particular job.

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I will explain in a minute some of these qualities, but it comes in number two, what deema Falco mean, to him? Again, we have to basically present them in a balanced way that because men are the provider,

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men provide for the family.

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Men are the Sustainer financially. That means brothers, if you do not provide for your families, you lose that. Basically privilege, you lose it. And I'm telling you the moment that you allow your wife to go out to work, you lost half of the coma already. Half of it is gone.

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You don't qualify anymore. Look at the criteria. Una Nisa Bhima de la la Hubba Humala walima en Saku min Amorim inshallah Yani without any delay because normally we get taken with so many other things, but let's focus in the curriculum here. We promised to discuss four aspects of this man. lol. This Emil, this man who's in charge. Number one. Yani Alabama How are four areas? area number one, the qualities of this any of the qualities of this leader? What kinds of qualities what kinds of characters should you possess, to be in charge of a family? And again, I want to stress something here that if that is why we're going to mention some of these qualities, not necessarily all of them

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inshallah and planning just to go over 10 quickly, just less than for you. I want to say something if you do not possess some of it.

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You have to work on it.

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Yeah, characters and manners. You have to train yourself some time to process it to have it.

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Because we always hear that word. We always hear that statement being made by a lot of Muslim brothers. Allah made me this way. I get angry all the time. Allah made me upset all the time. I just don't control my hobby. You have to work on it.

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in MLA movie,

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if you want to be knowledgeable, no

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learn. Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when some of the companions came after Bukhari, they came asking for money. Some of Lancer when they heard that he received some wealth from in Bahrain, he given them and he said woman near

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your full law, oh, yada,

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yada if you don't have that quality of being a thief that you do not look at money, too much. TAF woman Nieto sub borough

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Yata suburb, a suburb, act in patience.

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Act in renouncing the union act like it. And normally what you do once you act you act, you act you act you end up what it was American law together. First you must act that you are what you are patient, act, act impatience, act the love, act like it and the more you act, you get used to it, then it becomes what one of the qualities which you possess.

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The second corner erode the second area where we want to discuss how to reduce this man lower the Sustainer of the family. him to understand the nature of that mission. I'm telling you what I made that statement in the last lecture and I really mean it. It's a Mission Impossible right now to keep your family I'm telling you, and I'm not joking.

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Things keep building up by all the sudden your wife because I'm done with you. I don't want you and you're thinking that things are going okay.

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It's a Mission Impossible, why an unexplained? Number three, you must understand the character the type of person whom you're dealing with here.

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women had different nature than us. That is why they are called the opposite gender. They process things differently. They are not like us men, you need to understand this. And I will show you from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam informed us about this nature. But again, a lot of the non Muslims a lot of the Muslims they use this text to write it you'll the women,

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they will open up this article. Your formula sheet to make fun to be circular Habibi is not mentioned because of this is measured for you to know the nature of the person who you're dealing with here that Allah fashion them.

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The majority of them are in this way. Then inshallah we'll go into number four, and hopefully we'll be able to at least to mention one of them today is the duties of the man. Once it comes towards his family, or the duties, or the responsibilities, or the rights of the wives are born, the husbands so let's begin. Charla.

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Are you ready? So we're going to talk about what

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four areas are Obama not upon the fact that Heather burden

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the qualities that you must possess. I promised to mention Justin I could list up to 25 but 10 is good. Number one, sincerity.

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Do this for Allah.

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You want to keep your family together for Allah. You want to provide for your family for Allah the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned chemically Bukhari that a person can spend

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in the cause of Allah here and there, but the best of your spending is what you feed your wife and Mama, we said that you have to work. You have to provide what for your family, you have to go to work, you're going to end up giving to your paycheck your wife, your family. Now, that's a bad idea.

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Be sincere about it that you're doing this to get the reward from Allah subhanahu wa taala. And sincerity is one of the tools to overcome hardships, Jani, one of the things that saves you from trouble is sincerity. If you're doing this for the sake of Allah, Subhana, Allah, Allah Subhana Allah and you look at the three individuals who found themselves in the cave, with Iraq, blocking their way out, sincerity, help them. So if you're sincere about keeping your family, about guarding your family, about protecting your family, about providing for your family, Allah will help you. This is number one, sincerity. Number two, you have to be an OSHA, you have to be an example.

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You cannot tell your wife not to lie and you're lying. You You can you cannot tell your wife not to do this and you're doing it. It doesn't work this way. Yeah, and it's upon Allah Rajan filosa. The man in the family is like the heart in the body. If the man is sound, the whole family will be some. Everything begins with you.

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The soundness of the family depends on the soundness of the father of the Sustainer of the provider. The same thing of the

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Panama Imam, Imam, or the leader is like the, the source of the river. Imagine that river you have a river running. Now, if that source is bad, imagine the water is gonna spoil what

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every wherever it goes.

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wherever it goes, whether you're lucky and Malik, if the Malik is the king is corrupt, all of his helpers will be corrupt. For you must be an example. You must be seen praying, you must see in respectful of the mother You must see in respectful of others, so you must be an OSHA and hacker. This is how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam being traded and hammered the hearts of his followers, because they saw him doing himself what he is commanding others to do. He was the first to do things. Number three, you must be merciful. Yeah.

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It doesn't mean that you're you're the head of the family that you're mean you loud you yell No, no. Fabien RR martin minima. Helen Keller, who you must have mercy when I couldn't have one earlier. Lance abdomen.

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If you are mean people are not your family are not going to hang around you. Right Jani. They told us when we are brought up these characters who say you know the character that with the soap opera. A guy when he comes inside the house, everybody shakes the father when he comes inside the house. And they presented this to us by the way that this is praiseworthy. This is something that is good. That when the father walks into the house, everybody goes under the

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hide away because they are afraid of him and this is the right father. This is absolutely

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they must come running hugging you. Giving you a hug. llll

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Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says in Shangri La hotel

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The worst of Shepherd is the one who is mean who basically beat everyone down for you must have mercy. So sincerity. You must be a good example number four, you must have what? mercy number four? shoe.

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This is the affair of the whole orchestra of the whole family. You must use Sure. Yeah. Why do we have a problem between the shoulders in our message? And I'm not talking about here. Okay, shoulders.

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Number one, but I'm talking about other message. Shura, Elena because the people who were not taught sure in their homes, they will watch your eyes and then he comes into the message that it becomes a show remember, and he doesn't have a choice. But if we have brought up our children from day one, that we sit with them and we discuss issues Listen, these are issues of the dounia as long as there is no Allah said kala, as long as the messenger said Kala Kala Rasool then you can see your opinion intercooler, I can say my opinion, and we'll go with the best one and nothing personal. If I accept your opinion and leave my opinion, none. There's nothing wrong with it. It's not personal at all. So

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you must bring out the affairs of your family with your family. don't dictate it. You must talk to your wife about what you're planning to do. Don't just say and come today. You know what, I decided to move to that place. So to move chairs on cieza larches is part of the family. Talk to her about it.

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We talked to her is that she's okay with that. Talk to the children sit with the children, sit with them and bring them up. Listen, we live here in Denver. What do you think Can we go to Aurora it's actually closer to the mercy then and so forth with the What do you think is that good? I let them express let that young man express his opinion

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and watch him expressing his opinion and hear him and and an answer is that is the Shura. That is the concept of the sure it must be based on the shoe if you are the head of the family. And and this is how the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam run the affairs of his oma This is how the leader should be that you use Shura when you decide things.

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You must be fee and just and I know I'm talking about you know towards the wives here but yet you know very soon in nine months after you get married you want to have children. Okay, you may end up falling in love with one child and more than the other. Let not your love for one of your children drive you to commit injustice. And let not your hate or dislike for any of the children drive you to commit basically injustice against that person. While a gerrymander come Shana Andrew Coleman Allah Allah tala de lu lu v Subhana lionni. This is the nomadic negotiator with it with his father, that his father actually wanted to say that but she, he had more than one child. And he wanted to give it

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to a man something special because he loved the normal, more normal is his son. He wanted to give him something more than his other brothers. His wife told him go and ask the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam about this. And at the end of the day, you know, Rasul sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told him go and do it, find another witness, I'm not going to witness over something that is falsehood in the last half a zoo, this is falsehood. So you as the head of the family have to be feed to all the members of the family, treat them justly. You see in every sort of loss and like you said, regarding Ayesha, me, this is what's in your heart in your heart. Nobody can dictate whom you

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love, and who you should love more, because you have no control over this. But what you can dictate is justice is justice. You have to be fair amongst your basically family members. Number six, be humble. Like I said, level ability when Allah subhanaw taala described the believers Yahuwah. And these are some of the qualities that we must follow with one another. Yeah, and we, as Muslims, as Muslims here in this community, we must lower our wing and we must humble ourselves as like I must humble myself before you What about your own family?

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You must be humbled with your wife, humble yourself before her. humble yourself before I'm not saying to prostrate to her, but be humble. Don't be arrogant with your wife. This is your wife. speak to her like you speaking to another human being whom you value and respect in a way at the same time, you must be strong. You must be this is normal.

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Seven, you must be a decision maker. If you want to be a leader, you must be able to take decisions. And decisions are tough times, sometimes the whole family, the whole ship will be basically encountering problems and they will be looking at you to make decisions. Don't wait for your wife to come up with the decision. I mean, you can talk with her about it. But don't wait until the ship is about to sink. And then you say, you know, you know what I think this is like somebody was asleep, and then by all the sudden you woke up, you must see. And as a leader, as a leader, you must see the problem before it comes, you must see ahead of time, you must expect things. That is why leaders are

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leaders, leaders. And that is why people criticize leaders all the time, because leaders they see farther away than the regular person, you're supposed to see 123 years ahead of the game, you must be ahead of the game. And that is why when the decision making time is here, you must be able to do it. Number eight, you must have the knowledge, the knowledge of the challenges which faces your family, you must become aware of the issues. Now we're having issues like face book, we're having issues like Internet, we're having issues like what are you going to do? What are you doing about this? What can you do to help your family and not to fall captive or victims to technology, for

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example. So you must be aware of the challenges which faces your family, and you must educate your family about it and the danger. And that comes in number eight, you must be able to convince them that this is not good for you, I must have parental control, I must we must make sure that you don't go into that site that you don't go into that Facebook, you cannot have your fate your picture you you must be able to convince your wife, your daughters, your children over this things. Number 10. And number nine, I'm sorry, you must be able to forgive a leader must be able to forgive. You know, when whenever you're hurt by your community let go. I mean, as a leader, you shouldn't be trying to

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break even with people don't do this. The same exact thing. If you are the head of the family, have your child harm you discipline the child, don't try to break even all the time. Don't try to break even with your wife all the time, you must be worth well.

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That's understood this he said that I will not break even with my wife because Allah said that I have a higher level than her. It's like

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when a little boy hurt you and you go on after the delay and you let go. You must be let go. Comes in number 10 which is patience. You must have patience, patience, patience with your family.

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Yeah, if the process is so difficult, well I feel for you, especially in this country. It's amazing. Because you're fighting right or left, you know, a lot of forces a lot of unseen forces. A lot of scene forces, so you must be patient. What's the one AR Sabu Kayla Bella, so we covered number one, number two, the nature of the job here the nature of the mission. Like I said, it's a mission impossible, because I said in my last lecture, the head of the institution of disbelief, Sudoku free fill up after your marriage, hobbies that you hear me saying all the time over and over again. But again, I remind you of it again. Every single day. shaitan places in the morning shape and police

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police javis a Muslim Sheriff on the other hand, he places his throne

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every day. And then he tells his little genies shayateen little ones whoever does the best job today. I will crown him with my own hands. I'll place the crowd I will give him a prize basically the sharpener gun sharpener gun

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Look how shaitan is is so active in his job. He is so beneficial to everyday he has a meeting with his helpers in the morning and a meeting at night. Imagine

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you cannot meet with your family once a week. shaitan meets every morning and every night to check on you to check in your marriage make sure it's dissolved. Make sure it's over.

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And here you are, you know so he comes at night. Who did the girl What did you do today one of them will stand I killed another I did not leave him until he killed I did not leave him until he committed adultery I did not leave him until he did this and this and sit down sit down sit until this guy stands. This gentleman stands and says I did not leave this husband and wife until I got them divorced. shaitan will say ma'am and and and come you

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The man, you are the best Ginny. You're able to separate a husband and wife. So see the head, of course, is after your marriage and so polite.

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It amazes

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me when use of Elisa

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when he got his family back when he was rejoined with his family

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when his father came with his brothers from Philistine to Egypt

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to hula sujeto Kala

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fabuleux Paddy Jalla hora de haka. Look at this look at the Oksana be the progeny minister Jeannie wotja Abbey communal bed we mimbar the naza Shay upon obey ni wa ina shavon shavon after Stefan has what separated us separated me from my brothers Chaitanya shavon is after separating Muslims from one another. And he said we have the bond of brotherhood in the midst he tries to do this amongst us. And then you have the bond that who would you and your family you would do and the way he tries to do shaitan is out you know the concept of divide and conquer. Divide even though been bad the anessa cytarabine.

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For you, honey, I really want to say that the mission is difficult is not easy. But again, when we talk about a family here, we're talking about a Muslim family.

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We're not talking about just any family. The mission of the Muslim family is to get to gentlemen.

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Get to gentlemen and Rasul Allah Allah wa sallam diseko Pharaoh Rasul Allah, Allah wa sallam says cannot be extraordinary tirmidhi Allah in se la de la hora de

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the commodity of Allah is expensive. Basically, the mission of the Muslim family is to get to Gemini is to make it to gentlemen. And it happens that Gemini is expensive. You have to do a lot of work is not easy. And in a salon De La Hoya de la mesilla de la heljan enough that you will see Mohammed Salah Salem and Jen

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will your family enough that you will see a law? Fillion

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the mission yes is difficult but insha Allah Yani keep going Bismillah Allah, and like the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned the saya Muslim festival. Jana, the agenda is surrounded with what? Bill mcherry things that you dislike, things that are not easy. But the Hellfire is surrounded with what

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this letter likes things that you like. Okay, let's come to number three.

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And this is very interesting.

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The nature of the women. And we really have to use politics here because I think we have systems upstairs. So let me get a drink of water while I stand biLlahi while I just

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don't get in trouble in Sharla

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like I said, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us about the woman and the nature of the woman. It is soon

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but again,

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we will not pull that out this to make fun of them.

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Or for the non Muslims to use this text they are now the Hadith nakazato rocklyn are the variable used by the non Muslims. Chef look at your son says about the women that they have a deficit in their mind in their brain in their mental capacity. And look, look you guys belittling woman. No.

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Yes, well, we need to understand this.

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women go through a lot of physical changes.

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They do. I mean, if they are natural women, I mean, there are women now that are not natural. They she spends her life throughout.

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And she doesn't even get married. Like we're talking about what a normal sister like a Muslim woman.

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When she reaches the age of puberty,

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what happens to her? She starts seeing this body things coming out and blood coming out this these are physical changes that affect the woman.

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She gets pregnant. Okay, then what? her belly what grows

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and then she delivers and then breastfeeding. And then she gets pregnant again. These are things

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Things man, come on. I mean, we men when we have something grows little thing grows in your body, you run to the emergency room and the sister ends up with a nine month baby in her womb. And this is by, by the way, one of the things which justifies or explains why Allah subhanho wa Taala whenever he spoke about the rights of the parents, or final incentive be well, he they and then he immediately goes, and he enjoins upon us to be beautiful to us.

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To the mother, right away the mother will Sahabi the companion who came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Yara Sula, la mina Hakuna sibiya hoarseness of Betty who is the person who deserves my best character, my best companionship.

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Your mother call your mother,

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your mother then your father. Why? Because of this, they deserve because they go through a lot of things and Subhanallah any one of the things also which can explain why the Sharia or the religions dress the rights of the mother of three times or by mentioning it in the Quran so often because your work is done at a time when the child still not aware of it.

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The majority of the work of the mother is done when the child is what is not doesn't know. Do you remember the time when your mother changed your diapers? Of course we didn't have diapers then but right. But do you remember

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when she watched you? Do you remember when you were hungry and she given you food to eat? When you're a baby breastfed Do You Do you remember that you do remember nothing but what you remember you remember your father

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when he came back home and he giving you the money and that is why Allah subhanaw taala is directing our attention to up to the mothers because the work was done at a time when or what not paying attention but as soon as we begin gaining consciousness and watching and observing things and recording things in our memory all what we see the father the father is the one who brings the money the father is the one who brings the shopping the father is the one who makes the calls. So the children may think is the father is no one who is more deserving of the assembly the

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beautifulness of the children for the women they go through a lot of physical changes that is why we are required to be treating them in a way that is fitting to the condition okay let's take the first howdy

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Kohler Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Alma to Julio min Bala

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we're in our just been a Allah,

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the woman was created from a rep

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and the rep is been to begin with.

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Now if you try to straight in the trip, make it straight. What are you gonna do? You're gonna break it. But now I want you to think about this.

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Where is there it is your body and your body.

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Protecting what limbs? Which limbs, the heart, the lungs.

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imagine not having this piece to be a rip and you fall in your chest.

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What is going to happen to your heart?

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What I'm trying to say is, is there a wisdom behind having reps in this area?

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There is always there is also a wisdom behind creating the women this way.

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Do you refute the fact that there is a wisdom behind Allah Subhana Allah placing the rep the reps in your body in that area

00:34:08--> 00:34:17

then you should not do the same. Once it comes to the woman being created from Allah subhanho wa Taala fashioned her this way for wisdom.

00:34:20--> 00:34:24

Basically the scholars they say she's emotional, extra emotional.

00:34:25--> 00:34:35

Okay, women have to be emotional in order to rush when the baby cries at night who wakes up you snoring

00:34:36--> 00:34:47

at night and she wakes up because of that emotion because of that feeling because of that extra extra feeling with Allah with which Allah subhanaw taala placed in her.

00:34:48--> 00:34:51

So yes, it serves what

00:34:52--> 00:34:59

a purpose, a greater purpose than treating you. I know sometimes these emotions get on us

00:35:00--> 00:35:15

times but there is a need for it in the other aspects of your lives. You understand the point I'm trying to make here that is why you're supposed to be what you're supposed to be kind and nice to her. And Subhanallah Yanni hadn't had

00:35:17--> 00:35:20

this hadith the woman was created from a rip

00:35:21--> 00:35:24

it was placed between two commands.

00:35:25--> 00:35:35

Is tofu been Hyper V? And it's Olympiad it's a Muslim. It's also been a fruit salad before he made that statement he said well, it's also been Nisa.

00:35:36--> 00:35:41

And after he made that statement, they said first also be nice if a euro

00:35:44--> 00:35:49

then be good to them be nice to them after he said that they are made up of

00:35:51--> 00:36:00

after the BC before the process Allah made that statement and after it he made that command Be kind to them be nice to them.

00:36:02--> 00:36:04

There are wisdom there is a wisdom behind this.

00:36:05--> 00:36:08

Okay, how do you now decide to opt in

00:36:09--> 00:36:10


00:36:13--> 00:36:25

non Muslims abused this hadith and use it in a way to show that look, women are have deficit in their intelligence No, yeah, Habibi. What is meant here that she is also emotional.

00:36:27--> 00:36:32

You see, when your emotions when you you are emotional.

00:36:33--> 00:36:34


00:36:35--> 00:36:36

will not function.

00:36:38--> 00:36:52

I want to ask you, when you're angry and upset, can you make decisions, good decisions? Can you make good decisions? When you're upset? When you're angry? When you're emotional? Can you make good decisions? You can't

00:36:53--> 00:36:55

you must work come down

00:36:56--> 00:37:00

and allow the mind what to process women do not have this.

00:37:03--> 00:37:09

Just to show you that it does not mean that at all. Look at this. At least it was

00:37:10--> 00:37:25

Let's marry it for the sake of refuting the allegations of non Muslims once it come to this hadith once it comes to this hadith. Nabi sallallahu Sallam in the name of ad said Dr. Sharon Nisa, a woman does a dotnet give a lot of sadaqa will accept nominal

00:37:26--> 00:37:39

and do a lot of stuff. ask Allah for forgiveness, for me like to put an ad for it. Now. I have seen you the majority of the dwellers of the Hellfire for politeama tune Jessie law.

00:37:40--> 00:37:42

Actually Jesse that meaning a smart woman

00:37:44--> 00:37:47

right here a smart with Jessie lanie and a

00:37:48--> 00:37:55

zakia. A smart women as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, woman, woman and

00:37:56--> 00:37:57

Allah He x

00:37:59--> 00:38:19

y O Messenger of Allah we are are we the majority of the dwellers of the Hellfire? Kala sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says that Thorn Allah that thornell Lana YOLO c'est la la la la you cushy cushy cushy goes all the time. What foreign Elashi

00:38:21--> 00:38:29

and you are basically ungrateful to your husbands. But here is the statement that I'm looking for one

00:38:30--> 00:38:38

minute is hotteok limb worthy in our level levy look binning Could

00:38:41--> 00:38:54

I have not seen someone who is emotional basically who has that characteristic of being emotional? overcoming the smartest man then you

00:38:55--> 00:39:05

llama by the way is like you know like yeah if she can go around the man she will get him wallow in Tamil hot even if you are who

00:39:06--> 00:39:11

he felt when he went to get a man. This Allah tala Allahu

00:39:12--> 00:39:14

Yanni when he wants to get a man

00:39:18--> 00:39:19


00:39:20--> 00:39:24

he can use use veillonella Jabu libre,

00:39:25--> 00:39:27

Emre fillet.

00:39:28--> 00:39:44

Amara I mean Nagasaki are clean Wadi. Oh live live Isla de la Piana, I have not seen someone who has that quality, but yet able to overcome and dominate the smartest man

00:39:45--> 00:40:00

of Florida. So it does not mean that we're saying women are yappy we have women who who are smarter than than men in school. Women are smarter than men and a lot of men in school will not

00:40:00--> 00:40:33

Talking about this now refer to Auckland, the province of Ontario settlements. What meant here by eight he said that your testimony is what equals to why because you're emotional because of your emotion you could witness against somebody and just unjustly That is why I want to say here that basically Be careful. The only a woman she is emotional comes in now COSATU Dini,

00:40:35--> 00:40:53

we said nakazato that there they are emotional tie what what why why they are described to be have deficit in the religion Rasul Allah wa sallam explains, because you stay days and nights without salah and without fasting.

00:40:55--> 00:40:59

Correct. When women have their period, they cannot walk.

00:41:00--> 00:41:12

They cannot pray and they cannot fast Ramadan or the mean when I am cuso Dean. But what is meant by the word religion he Eman faith,

00:41:14--> 00:41:20

because we know faith yet what increases and decreases? What makes your faith increases?

00:41:21--> 00:41:22

Will a man

00:41:23--> 00:41:47

a man acting righteously, Salah is evic occur. Women are deprived from fasting from praying at least 76 five days some of them they go up to 14 days up to 15 days. This causes their their faith what to drop. And when your faith is down, you're irritated more.

00:41:49--> 00:42:21

Why do you feel good after attending a lecture like this? Because there is what your faith What? Yeah, and when you go out? If somebody pushes you he will look at him and smile. But imagine Liliana neffs enough's gets purified when you do the act of force. Maybe Solomon spoke about waking up at night for the head Judo for federal he said when a person does this us baja evenness he will wake up in the morning what has a pew

00:42:23--> 00:42:36

pew so your knees at the at harmony but when he sleeps at night and he doesn't even wake up for the hydrate and even allow he even allows the time for federal to

00:42:37--> 00:42:38

to pass by.

00:42:39--> 00:42:52

For us baja Wii tennis is nuts as what hobbies yeah and if you touch him he's gonna fight you he's gonna fight with you and touch because he's irritated because he's a man is what his faith is what

00:42:53--> 00:43:11

his faith is doubt the same exact thing with the woman here. These been days these been nights without acts of worship. So you have to be careful there faith is what is down. So when a person's faith is down, that means his level of tolerance is almost zero.

00:43:12--> 00:43:35

So you have to be careful especially when your wife and her period you have your on hand little that that box handled with care for a child something like that. Yes. I got it handled with key Yeah. Yeah. And she's gonna try to actually and when you rotate it by the way you normally try to hold a fight. You try to come What do you been?

00:43:37--> 00:43:54

And why did you do this? Huh? Why did you come early and she tries what to come after you and Boo Boo. Boo like get you in trouble. And as soon as he gets in trouble over she got you and something about women when you make them upset they want to talk about it.

00:43:56--> 00:44:06

It's different to you when you get upset. You want to go somewhere inside your room close the door and singing salamu

00:44:08--> 00:44:15

you know have the guy Malibu you know the community you know have a song that they committed in justice against me.

00:44:16--> 00:44:33

Why married this woman when newly lambs are built with a tribal area I recall the days I should have married this other dude in the girl in the college that was the wrong choice. And she wanna come and walk and talk about it. Honey, what should we do honey?

00:44:34--> 00:44:41

She will speak Moroccan. There is a big problem if you allow time to go by without speaking to her.

00:44:43--> 00:45:00

I want to own your brother's if you if you if you go and quarreling with your wife fighting with your wife, and then you want to go by yourself now and just dwell on your sadness and grief. And she is what she is boiling grilling inside. And if she doesn't find you to talk to her husband

00:45:00--> 00:45:01

Call the United Nations.

00:45:03--> 00:45:07

Guess who is the United Nations? The laws?

00:45:09--> 00:45:10

The laws.

00:45:12--> 00:45:14

Her father, what did you do to her now?

00:45:15--> 00:45:22

They want me to come and take her Oh, shoot by escalation. And it's wonderful when she talks to somebody else.

00:45:23--> 00:45:31

A woman like her, and this woman that type is doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo. She's gonna pass on all your secrets to the community.

00:45:34--> 00:46:07

When you get upset with her because women are of this time, when they get upset when they get mad, they want to speak about it right away. Just tell her can Honey, can I just have five minutes, please? Just five minutes. And I will just let me go and get your five minutes you need your five minutes to otherwise if you speak like this, you're going to be upset you're going to be mad at us when the whole thing is going to turn into a nightmare. Get you five minutes inside the room but come out quickly. Let's talk about it. Let's settle this. So now beside to our clean wedding, Happy

00:46:09--> 00:46:16

panela intelligent sharp, sharp FM manual Zaha

00:46:18--> 00:46:24

Gani the Sharia your sinful if you divorce your wife when she is in the state of puberty I'm sorry state of

00:46:26--> 00:46:29

menses young having her cycle. But Allah

00:46:31--> 00:46:36

tala it counts. If you tell your wife I divorce you when she is in her cycle. It counts but you are sinful.

00:46:38--> 00:46:46

You are sinful for divorcing her. When she is in that state. You should not divorce you cannot divorce your wife when she's going through that condition.

00:46:48--> 00:47:13

And I'm telling you the overwhelming majority of the divorces in the oma happened during that time. Then the director Almere again in the religion does not mean deficit in the religion faith. The word de means faith her faith is what? down to the bottom. She's looking for problems shaitan II see shaitan also has more access to you when your faith is what is down. Legendary Salah la sala

00:47:15--> 00:47:15


00:47:16--> 00:47:17

la Wanda

00:47:18--> 00:47:20

walks behind the son of Adam.

00:47:21--> 00:47:32

And the only way for the fun of Adam is to protect himself from tripod is if you remember is Allah subhanaw taala as if he entered into a full fortress for shaitan also is after her.

00:47:34--> 00:47:36

The majority of the divorces happen then

00:47:38--> 00:47:41

comes in equal. So Nafisa to applin

00:47:42--> 00:48:31

for nyla she's had a la fille Howdy, Jani, they are what colors sisters are colors every day different color when they honey How you doing and everything is good. And they said the following days what different color Oh yeah, totally Elashi Allah subhana wa sallam that Colonel La la la la could not reduce the Huracan if the man is kind of nice to you all throughout the his life basically, he's going by the book and when he does something wrong, that you don't lie, you turn colors again you change you change on him, you tell him you are bad, comes in number five.

00:48:32--> 00:48:42

The women are fashion to be trickery, but positive there is a there is a positive trickery that they trick and

00:48:43--> 00:48:54

they like to trick trick in the sense of they do like to get things through this way and I like method Christoph soon.

00:48:55--> 00:48:56


00:48:58--> 00:49:02

sooner say I could be wrong. If as soon as

00:49:04--> 00:49:10

a man came to a smell of Yolanda, the wife of the wife of his development or one left

00:49:11--> 00:49:15

the sister of Ayesha Mohammed II mean Abby from her father.

00:49:16--> 00:49:38

He said to her, can you allow me to sell next your house? Can he he has some stuff you want to sell and the house of his value was in the main street and the man basically wants to sit in front of the house in front of the house in the courtyard or so and sell his brother

00:49:39--> 00:49:45

for as Matt knows his job is very Jarvis is the wire onto here. So boy you can

00:49:48--> 00:49:50

fish he knew that if she tells him Yes.

00:49:52--> 00:49:59

As the buyer is not gonna like it. That is the buyer comes in walk in and he finds somebody sitting in front of the house and sitting what she said to him when

00:50:00--> 00:50:05

Until a zoo buyer comes and then make the request and wait until it

00:50:06--> 00:50:28

comes back home. And then you make the request I hayleigh a trick. So she came the man came after Satan as the alarm on return. And he asked his wife about basically getting a permission to sit in front of the house right away especially there is no other house in the city but our house

00:50:33--> 00:50:36

she agreed with him earlier. There is no other house

00:50:37--> 00:50:39

you Yeah, he can sell right here.

00:50:40--> 00:50:42

Now you can sell

00:50:43--> 00:50:45

don't speak Yanni don't speak he can sell

00:50:47--> 00:50:49

a good trick

00:50:53--> 00:50:54

for a lot of workers to do

00:50:55--> 00:50:58

anything female Nicola lacunae, Allah will moderate this mountain there is

00:50:59--> 00:51:03

a piece that a lot of you are unaware of. When Rasulullah Salam was sick,

00:51:04--> 00:51:11

his final illness and he is in bed. Moreover, clean folio salib in

00:51:13--> 00:51:27

command to lead the people in the solar. A lot of you or a lot of those who present this hurry they always say will I objected this Why? What was his take? What was her take what it really is

00:51:31--> 00:51:36

that she recommended someone else to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Why?

00:51:37--> 00:51:38

In bakrid

00:51:39--> 00:51:49

Ababa krazee Rajan se Abu Bakr is a very soft hearted person. That's what he said to the Prophet. But this is not the fact.

00:51:50--> 00:51:51

This is not the fact.

00:51:52--> 00:52:11

Basically, she said overkruin he leads the Salah, he cries when he recites the Quran, he cries, and the Muslims will not be able to hear his recitation because of this because it's very soft hearted with the Quran left. Asia meant something else. I was afraid that

00:52:12--> 00:52:19

our work will be the next after the Prophet sallallahu wasallam and Salah imagine brain behind the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

00:52:20--> 00:52:24

as a companion and then you see Abu Bakr the Imam afterwards.

00:52:25--> 00:52:58

And she was afraid that Muslims are going to what feel what? Jani because you almost couldn't be wearing a Abu Bakr With who? And she actually revealed this in one of the wording fee is Al Bukhari she revealed this is I'm just afraid that the people are going to have bad feelings about my father being the first one who needed an Salah after the Prophet after brain behind the prophet SAW some fat she used what she is the healer. She tried to say what to convince and she went after Huff's. She went after half so to get the prophet to ask her to leave

00:52:59--> 00:53:19

me in Cornelis our use of moral values and live in Tel Aviv work to lead the Salah, and this is just the testimony for those who say that there is anybody else worthy of the leadership of the Muslim Ummah after our Casa de la casa de Pere you

00:53:20--> 00:53:22

we say one more quality

00:53:24--> 00:53:25

or whatever okay with the time

00:53:27--> 00:53:31

10 minutes excellent. Okay, how do you have the alarm on?

00:53:34--> 00:53:51

Beautiful Women are knowing of the jealousy women are jealous. And so hon Allah, Allah subhanaw taala created created them with the jealousy. But yet Allah subhanaw taala tested them with allowing the man to take more than one wife. She will lift the bar Oh Leon Lee.

00:53:52--> 00:54:06

Allah made them jealous but at the same time tested them would work with their husbands being allowed to marry and take more than one wife just to see the test how they are tested. A little person that

00:54:07--> 00:54:19

Jani Sophia Viola Juana been too high. Up Sophia was known to be a very well, very good Jani cookie nanny in

00:54:20--> 00:54:33

Los Alamos with the with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was with his companions. And Sophia sent basically a dish to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

00:54:34--> 00:54:59

Look at the jealousy of Ayesha. She did what? strike that dish towel broke, and the food went down on the floor. But here is the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam with his humility and humbleness. He goes down and he picks the food and simply basically kills his companions harder. Tomoko Tomoko Tomoko, your mother got jealous.

00:55:00--> 00:55:07

Your mother got jealous your mother got jealous. Remember these qualities women are emotional you have to be

00:55:09--> 00:55:35

when they get emotional Take it easy don't don't react don't react when she gets upset when she gets mad. Don't react just wait help her out to come out of that condition. Don't forget that they change Jani they change colors basically. By all the sudden she can just dismisses everything that you've done for her

00:55:36--> 00:55:59

to talk for Nala. She's alright here. You are ungrateful. Don't blame me for this because that's the nature but try to remind her to be grateful to her husband. Let's come to the first piece in Sharla and mentioned a little bit of it in sha Allah, which is at the leaf of Sharia. l Manu Patu. Bill.

00:56:00--> 00:56:06

the duties of the husband the responsibilities of the husband.

00:56:07--> 00:56:20

What are these responsibilities? The first one Coloma de la Subhana. Allah says, Yeah, you have Latina man who am fuscia como de la.

00:56:22--> 00:56:27

You job as a guardian of this family is to protect them from the hellfire.

00:56:29--> 00:56:46

Imagine this. Yeah, you're Latina M and o qu full circle. Li coonara protect them from the hellfire. Do whatever it takes to protect them from the hill fire. an alley Natalia

00:56:47--> 00:56:51

explained this verse beautifully. He said, Ravi Allah Juan

00:56:52--> 00:56:58

de mucho de teach them the religion. By the way, if your wife does not pray,

00:57:00--> 00:57:02

it's your responsibility.

00:57:03--> 00:57:11

If your wife I'm telling you brothers, if your wife does not pray, you're going to be asked in the reverse direction. Pilate Allah Allah subhanaw taala says,

00:57:12--> 00:57:15

Mo laka

00:57:16--> 00:57:17


00:57:18--> 00:57:19


00:57:20--> 00:57:22

command your

00:57:23--> 00:57:27

meaning the wife and the children to pray was spotted.

00:57:29--> 00:58:09

and be patient in doing this like every day. If you know your wife skips salads, did you pray and come and remind her Did you play did you play? Did you play acid? Did you pray Maghrib stub every single day you have to do this until you make sure that she prays Allah subhanaw taala when he spoke about Nebula his name was called Phil kitabi is made in Ghana saw the palma de la Cana Rasulullah nebia. What he used to do what kana? Yeah mo who will salah and mentioned in the book is made, and the following verse he used to command his to pray

00:58:12--> 00:58:21

that he was zeca joaquina in Dharavi Maria Bukhari Muslim palletised Giovanna is a scan and we use a lavalier

00:58:22--> 00:58:34

the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to pray at night you suddenly were and are our people. While me laying down more authority over to nada Rashi and I'm in bed for

00:58:35--> 00:58:51

the new kid with his adult about to play with i cavani pakala Kumi chef Ltd. At least in which we can wipe up the brain with Miss Lazarus tadros. This is if you pray that the hedger to begin with

00:58:53--> 00:59:46

lon was done. Maybe sal Allahu Allah alayhi wa sallam. He had his own masala, Amman Khomeini, his takeover and abuse of Allah salallahu alayhi wa sallam the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam woke up that that Allah Allah one night for me sleep for color, he said Subhana Allah Subhana Allah, mer their own Zilla la letter mean and fitted how many fitness? They send it tonight. There is no such thing as if he seen a lot of trials and tribulations coming down. Why murder footie homina Jose now what is the best way to handle fitted menu saw Hey Ben, I want somebody to wake up that dwellers of the rooms meaning his wives to do what to pray because this is the best way to handle what trials

00:59:46--> 00:59:59

and tribulations savvy who will build a family Phaeton her encounter with your deeds righteous deeds fitted. Nabi salatu salam ala rasulillah Juan Rahim. Allahu Allah

01:00:00--> 01:00:06

Julian Carmina Lady for Allah. Allah will have mercy in a man who wakes up at night to pray to hydrate.

01:00:09--> 01:00:31

Then he would wake up his wife, if she doesn't wake up navaja sprinkles what water on her. When Debbie sallallahu alayhi wa sallam came to take him to Allan Vitali. Try to say about the alarm on Houma. He came to Navistar live and Fatima he knocked the door at night and said Allah to suddenly Why don't you wake up and pray?

01:00:32--> 01:00:35

Say now he said You're a fool Allah in a walk

01:00:37--> 01:00:40

in second, why insha?

01:00:44--> 01:00:52

Allah, Allah, our souls are in the hands of Allah. If he will release it, if he will, he will. Maybe Salalah

01:00:54--> 01:01:00

he strike is his trial like this as it was in Santa Fe in general, a

01:01:03--> 01:01:07

man likes to argue man like, Yeah, he's teasing, you know, in a teasing manner. Yeah.

01:01:09--> 01:01:55

Yeah, I think we can stop here in Sharla. But again, we covered the three corners, the first we covered it fully in sha Allah, the attributes and the qualities of the man being the head of the family. We talked about the nature of the mission, it's difficult, that is why you need patience and that is why you need to do it for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala and we talked about the nature of the woman, the nature of the woman, you need to be aware of whom you are placed leaders over you are the head of the family, you need to understand the nature of women and we spoke before about the first husband duty which is safeguarding his family to Hellfire and be delighted I will go back to

01:01:55--> 01:02:19

this on Wednesday inshallah. next lecture, we are going to talk about hopefully finish the duties of the husband in the family or the rights of the wife upon the husbands and the rights of the children upon the husband. Does that blow halos panic Aloma handig La La Land to lay 100, illegible blonde, I mean