Channel: Edris Khamissa
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Not to Charla is as I speak to you to reflect on my life so that you too can reflect on your life
and do some fundamental things.
As a speaker, and I have conducted workshops in 30 countries, I can tell you something. If people asked me You asked any speaker, what legacy Would you like to leave behind?
They would say, in different words, I pray that when I spoke, I touch someone's heart. And that individual began to reflect on his or her life, that individual embrace change, and that individual use the information transform himself or herself. And that information became knowledge. You know what I'm saying? You understand me all of you.
Yesterday know? I've been headmaster you seem so I'm a teacher. So I know. You understand me and company law. I'm glad you do. Now psychologists have said that if you do not change within the first 48 hours after a presentation is unlikely you're going to change
unlikely going to change. So I want to repeat after me I'm a very unpredictable speaker. I feel a height bout that looking at my pretty face here. And I'm speaking to you I like to walk around to give a moving speech but I respect what you have in your soul. Stay put here Don't worry. Killing me though it is right. Right. I'm gonna say this I want you repeat after me say inshallah.
inshallah, I will change in the next 48 hours.
I will change in the next 48 hours.
inshallah I will change
in the next 48 hours.
I want you to look at each other. And two thumbs up, say I'm going to change do that command. Yes. Yeah. Right. If you're sitting on your own, you can do a thumbs up to your split personality. Right? Okay.
I speak at you at a time
when the oma is bleeding.
In modern history, I don't think Muslims have gone through a challenge or they're going through now.
I want to ask you a question.
And I want you reflect on your life.
The question is,
if you wait to die now,
May Allah give you a long pious life inshallah.
If you were to die now, would you be missed? For what would you be missed? Who will miss you?
If all the Muslims were to leave Sri Lanka today, would we be missed?
That's a question. Would we be missed? There is a difference my friend
and success? I don't talk about that now. But I want you to know that
would you be Miss
so we are living in very challenging times. Right.
So there are many things under sought out at the very beginning. So I want you to understand this.
How many of you love yourself Put your hands up? You love yourself?
All the hands should go up, isn't it? as a Muslim you should love yourself and not love yourself? Look in the mirror. Oh my gosh, I'm so beautiful and all that. Not that kind of love. Therefore that's why you make Yala You made me beautiful outside or to make the beautiful inside.
So you got to love yourself
and people tell me Idris man, you don't know how happy we are to see you. I said every morning when you look at the mirror. I say the same thing. Yes, I do. I have right okay. Now I want to.
There are so many myths. So many stories. So many stories really replete with the Nabi sallallahu wasallam interaction
People, non Muslims, what is enemies,
they are not meant for us to just study as a researcher is meant for us to embrace.
you know when the time of oppression, the time in the early days of Makkah,
as our workers take
sought permission from profitable IC o and obese and allow you to sell them
I want to leave
so in a B cell allow you to sell them,
granted him his wish. So, as he was
arranging his things and going to leave maccha,
a non Muslim by the name of the kidney, the agony set to Where are you going?
And he explained, why is he going? The reason for his way? What was his response? He said, If people was to the effect of your value, are going to leave us what would be our condition? What would be our condition to carry. So, I want you to stay,
and I will protect you. You know what I'm saying to you, you got to understand one fundamental thing, my beloved sisters, my beloved daughters and sisters, one fundamental thing,
by nature, is capable of a lot of good and also capable of doing a lot of bad things.
But when he does bad things, he ought to be uncomfortable doing it. They are in any community, in any community, a vast majority of people that are intrinsically good, they're good people.
But because we have not portrayed the true Islam in a meaningful way, they misunderstand us. So they judge us, not because they know us purely because what the media says, they say whoever controls the media controls your mind.
So when you walk down the street, no matter where you are, you are an ambassador for the deen of Islam.
In your silence, you're an ambassador, in your speech, you are an ambassador, in your conduct, you are an ambassador, whether you like it or not,
whether you like it or not. So I want you to understand that.
Right? I want you to understand that. And the role of Muslim women
is erroneously perceived by Muslims themselves.
If you look at the history of Islam, I can go on the old day, if you only know the contribution of Muslim women in society, unbelievable. Who was the first person to embrace Islam?
Who was the first person to be martyred? right do you do they who sit at the first university?
from Morocco face resonance, they've contributed to science and a whole range of things. I want you to understand that, okay. I want you to I want you, I want you to understand those initial aspects. Because I would like you, at the end of my program, to unleash your potential. Unleash your potential.
That's what all of us have is potential. You need to unleash it.
You understand? You got to unleash it. It can only come through self belief can only come when you look at yourself every day and ask yourself, what have I done today?
What did I do today? Right. So another question on asked you. Right. Okay. Last year, right.
You Who are you?
said I can't hear you.
Okay, you Why? You see nice. I'm glad you did what you did, and I like it. Right? I like it. I asked you who are you? Listen very, very carefully to me. Please. Very, very carefully to me. I asked Who are you?
I never asked you What's your name?
When you ask sisters, who are you are men also they give the name. Oh, my name is Fatima. I said oh, I said last year name. Who are you? I'm a female.
mean Ignasi what's your gender? Who are you? I'm a doctor nurse. She was in profession Who are you are Mrs. So and So agnostic, if you married, the best answer god,
I'm nothing but a humble servant of Allah.
Now, every day you put in, you've got that in your bedroom wall is nothing but a humble servant of Allah. And you can ask yourself every day, did I fulfill that vision, that mission? Have I done that every day? In my thoughts in my interaction in my Salah, in my interaction with non Muslims? Was I a humble servant of Allah? That's what you are.
You understand you're a semi I'm coming from. Do you understand where I'm coming from? Yes or no? Yes. You know, I someone, you know, whenever I go Alhamdulillah you know, you know, the notion we've got, you know, ready when you become Muslim, you look constipated.
Daddy, the notion you know, you know, you, you you you look constipated. You know, vanilla like also your characters which you don't smile.
It's not Islam.
It's not Islam. Right.
Muslims are optimistic people remember that?
Muslims are optimists.
They believe in Allah's mercy.
They believe in it. So, I want you to understand that I want you to understand that every day I would like you to live consciously and with intentionality, consciously and with intentionality.
so that people go back and they say, you know, what, you know, people's, I save this the paper, they see Muslim women are oppressed.
They know to oppress, I see how our neighbors how they work, I see how the husband treats the wife, I see what she does here. I mean, it no matter what the media says, but sometimes we perpetuate that stereotypical response. So we do you understand? Right? You understand? Does it make sense? You are you and I you understand what I'm saying so far? You do. Right? Okay. Now.
The next important thing is this. Very, very important. And I want you to understand this.
If you look at your life, a inverted commas in Islam, there's no such thing as minority You know, it might be the same minority, one person who believes in Allah, follow the Xander be allowed to sell them. And there are 3 billion people around him. He's the majority. Remember that? We don't look at numbers. And even the Battle of bother is an indication is your faith, your taqwa? Yes or no? They don't say oh, we know we're a small group of be, you know, a small group of people, a small group that was far greater than the rest of the population. Remember that? Right. So what I want you to understand is this. Very, very important, right? There are a few practical things that we need to
do. Right. And you saw for example, Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam, the way he interacted with the captives of war, right? Did he not feed them?
Did not clothed them. Yes or no? He did that. What? He had a chance of seeking Allah was right. That revenge, isn't it in ties? What did he do?
He did not, isn't it? So I'll look at all of those things are gonna be soldered down. He was seldom said words to the effect, forgive those who hurt you. And do good to those arm you agree? So it is right, Socrates. Right. So I want to just ask you another question very quickly. Right? Very, very quickly.
Right? You have a neighbor. Right? All if you have neighbors, right, unless you stay in the desert somewhere. Your neighbor maybe a few 1000 kilometers away. You all if you have neighbors, right? How many of you have Muslim neighbors put the answer?
Okay. How many of you have non Muslim neighbors?
Okay, it's the same number, but people must okay. Right. Now, the question is this. Your neighbor, for some reason, stops talking to you. Let's look at a practical level. And what Nafisa would have done practical level, he stopped, he or she stops talking to you. Right? Okay.
And but you're past each other every day.
The cheapest is your home. You gotta pass the home every day and you greet them in okay.
I didn't know how why well, however, you Lita and she does this. When she does.
He does this every day, right. Now, how many of you
How would you react committee? I want to know from you. How would you react in this situation?
Your smile it. Okay. Right? It's Oh no, you Greta. She does this and you just smile.
Right? He does it every day. He will keep on smiling.
keep on smiling. Okay. Right. Who else I like to know. Please, I want you to participate. Right? Has the Omer said worse? The fake 50% of knowledge come from good questions, isn't it? Yes or no? You could ask questions. We Muslims are not passive receptacles of knowledge. Not a job you're pouring in knowledge. Hey, we asked requested one person won the Nobel Prize for Physics or something they asked him to what do you attribute your success? He says, Well, most mothers will tell the children. What did you learn today, my baby? He says but my mother so asked me what good question Did I asked today that I made? Sure I asked. Good question. He created in me a spirit of inquiry and research.
You got to ask questions. Right. So how would you react? there?
You go some gifts. out to be your neighbor then sakaki. I get gifts. Right? Okay. gifts. Okay. Anyone else? Yes.
tried to speak to her final. And he does this and he speak to him?
And how many of you will stop talking to put your hands up?
You will stop.
Right? And if you really are these are real things. Right? Okay. I'll tell you why. I'm just telling you this. Well, I had a neighbor.
And they I stay. We stay Alhamdulillah invited an apartment in Durban you heard of Durban is beautiful place. Durban I like it. And you either pass by car or you walk right? And my neighbor and his wife. They they stopped talking to me. You know? So what? I used to do that. And my wife would get very upset to me and I love my wife, darling. I love you my darling. Right? So so when I used to greet I put the window down the car and greet him and her and my wife would pinch me. Pinch me. She told me I don't know what's wrong with you. They're not talking to you what's wrong with you? I say to a darling, they're not talking to me. I know what I'm talking to them.
Right? Because I must not allow other people to affect you. Hey, remember that you must continue to do that is good.
Very important. So coming back, this is I can go on and start your calculator very quickly. There was one person needs to greet the shopkeeper every day and buy the newspaper. He said Good morning, sir. May I have the newspaper please? Thank you.
So his friend accompanied him for three or four days. And he said to him, You know what? Really? You you met me so what do you mean is I I've been here with you about two or three days and every time you give them with so much of love and affection, he doesn't get you back he said what he said look at the answer. This was a turning point for me. He said well he must not tell me how I should behave towards him
right now, so living in this country right these are my suggestion right? They were some abiding principles in which the mistress meter I look at any of the incidents right right. And in these are the guiding principles. I will never be said aloud he was seldom always had a higher goal.
A higher goal. Yes, you know, what he wanted in the end? inshallah. inshallah, perhaps the be drawn towards the deen of Islam. Yes. I remember once when there was a janazah of a Jew, went past and found a piece of the louder sermon showed some emotion. And they were surprised. Right. So what I'm saying to you, always a higher goal. It was never vanity or ego ever came to play in his relationship. There was never a kid for Tet.
He was forgiving.
Even when he had a chance to be vengeful, when they conquered Makarem on the return, he could have been so right. Even when his daughter was fatally wounded. Hey, did he seek revenge? No.
Right. Okay. Even Khalid bin Khalid was one of the enemies of Islam before he became a Muslim.
But look at his response. So, so he had a higher goal. He was forgiving, he was compassionate. He always remembered what his purpose is.
When he came to justice, even between a Muslim and a non Muslim or non Muslim was right he made sure he meted out that justice.
There are so many examples agree
on a B cell allowed your cell numbers to get in different levels. Right? If you look at his interactions with these wives, what kind of interaction was it?
Was it Nabhi I was on a beach and allowed to sell them a romantic husband or not make them I'm writing a book is called nappy sell allowed to sell them the romantic profit. Make door for me you make to offer me the other book I'm writing also Nabisco will allow you to sell them the creative profit
made you out for me. Right. So So what was the relationship?
way spouse's happy when he used to come home. Right? They were happy. Okay. What else you know about him at home?
He held he stopped when he heard the call of Amazon Yes or no? What else you know about it?
A third. Yes. What else? There's so many examples. Right. And you're and the way they loved him? Did he have nicknames for them? Yes. What did he call BPI? sharp.
Right. But what was what was one code of metaphor they understood? They're not you know, but they're not. Right. So this was a romantic, we today assessments are not romantic. Are they? Yes or no? Are they um, if you are married
under the law, right. And if you are happily married, again, the same number ends, okay. Don't bluff. Right. I know. Right. Right. Okay. So, our NaVi says was really romantic. And he understood right out of the cell allowed to sell me this interaction. He always saw things from their perspective. Agree, right, that he knew when BPI she was upset with him right you know that right. So we know the story so in and what was your relationship with these children with Bibi Fatima Zahra what what was your relationship with her
loving right. It was a beautiful relationship and emotional relationship.
you must read his relationship with Fatima Zahra.
Yes, you read that.
I always break down
she will throw a lot Yes. And a condition.
But what did Nabis last them always remind them?
What did he remind them
about the year after? always reminded him so his relationship with his children would be all of them was caring and loving. Right? Okay. Right. But more importantly, he always reminded them about the year after.
Okay, right. Next thing what was his relationship with his grandchildren?
kindness, compassion even during Salah isn't it? Yes or no? Right beautiful relationship we had with him. You know that one example when the Bedouin saw him kissing his grandson I think it was and this and he said I had 10 children. I have not kissed any one of them. So there are two variations the one variation is it is not my fault if Allah removed mercy from your heart, isn't it? The other one is if you do not show mercy allow not show you mercy.
Every individual has them interacted with children. What did he do?
He was on his force Yes or no? Did he stand up and speak to them? No. On his force. Look at that. He made eye contact with them. Okay.
Okay, right. So what was his relationship
the Saba say humbucker city has an Omar
Osman Gani Ali, what was the relationship with him?
You were he loved them. Yes. You know, what was their relationship with him?
utter devotion, utter devotion. Okay. Now a very, very important thing. If you were to look at the life of Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam, right? Completely, right.
His spouses could never say he should have spent more time with us.
He was perfect in his timing.
His friends Saba close wants to not say anything negative about the time he spent with us. strangers who came to see him, they could not even complain.
And not only that, we as oma, we as oma, are ample testimony for the commitment devotion of the BSL allow yourself some years ago, I went to China
for a holiday and I went to a I went to a Masjid that was, and that must be that thing was built only 20 years after nubby Scylla laugier seldom left, I looked at it and I cried, I said, Yala, your prophet has done his
vision, fulfill this mission. But what about us? What about me? Okay, so then let's quickly look at very quickly, right? What was his relationship with
people, rulers of other countries? What was his relationship? What did he do?
letters and what was the letter, he invited them to Islam. Right. And remember our Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was very strategic.
Very, very strategic. Very, very important. Right? Similarly, here, it's important for you to interact, who are the community leaders in the Sri Lankan community? Who are they? Who are the sisters involved? Right, and remember this, our Nabi sallallahu, wasallam came as a mercy on to all creation, right? all humankind in creation, yes or no? Yes. Now remember this. Very, very important. So we, as Muslims, must not be seen to be insular. isolationists, we must not be seen that we must admit sin like living in a ghetto.
So you must not only support causes that affect us directly, we must support even humanitarian causes.
Get involved with the environment issues, get involved in.
Right, we must use the media to good effect.
Making sure the right kind of people represent us who are articulate and who have wisdom.
Very important. Right. We got to galvanize ourselves, the court to have a united front as it were.
Right, we got to have a united front. Is that okay? unison I'm saying to you, right. Now, the bottom line. Right. And this is going to be a difficult question, but I'm not asking. Anyway. Right.
How would you score the Muslim community here? out of 10? I'd rather see about you out of 10 that we are doing enough to build bridges yet. with other members of other faiths. We didn't enough to build bridges.
You see, right. Okay. Okay, sisters say seven years. Right? Right.
334 right. Is that good?
is not good at all. is not good at all.
Right. Now, the question is this and I want to I like mine to leave some some practical things, right. How would you share with you something very quickly, right, just for your information? Right. Right. To let you know,
how many minutes I
have half an hour for the including question time also
is too depressing time. Okay. Right. Now, you can ask questions, like Alhamdulillah just give a little background Alhamdulillah.
I've written two books on public speaking right. The one is called the dynamics of public speech from an Islamic perspective. The other one I put
did not bring the joys of public speaking.
So my friend and I had a meeting with the Department of basic education in South Africa.
Right? Because I'm also very concerned,
and an umbrella, the South African Muslims are amongst the most blessed Muslims in the world. Please believe me. If you come to South Africa, if you see the institution's, you've got a government that is very sympathetic to Islam, sympathetic to the Palestinian cause, and have to deal with and there were many Muslims that were martyred in the earlier days.
So I'm, I was a bit concerned about what's happening. Now you understand that we are seen as being isolationist, right. So we had a meeting with the Department of basic education, and Alhamdulillah.
We important memorandum of agreement for the next five years, my friend and I, to deliver public speaking to 6000 schools, how many schools 6000 schools,
and we say to them at no costs, we give the senior pupils a copy of the book, and we get a Muslim business people to sponsor it. And we'll get them on that day to take a photograph of what the logos, the whole idea, I also want them to get mileage out of it. And to understand that
right. Now, I had one example. I went to a school, in the countryside there to a indigenous school there. And I asked the headmistress after my presentation to what she said, asked her what are your needs in the school? She told me, I want sanitary towels for my girls. Can you believe it? how poor they are. So I arranged for that I arranged a uniform for them. And Alhamdulillah they're so excited. Right? So so we are trying, and what I'm also we and we started going from town to town, reminding Muslims, what the purpose is reminding them to get engaged with the community, that you are an ambassador with your employees, if you've got an investor, when you are sitting in the bus,
in the train, wherever it is, there are people on either side of you already have a negative image about you. You can either reinforce it, or you could change it.
You could change it.
You understand your smile, you're looking very depressed from your
smile. Yes. Okay. You can either change yourself. Right? So my question basically, is look at practical things, practical things, you got to ask yourself, basically,
what would not be would have worked? What would he have done in a community like this?
What do you think?
Would you have met with the leaders of the other faiths? Yes or no? Right? He would. So what I want you to do is this. I'm giving you I'm giving you people seven minutes, right?
You can get into groups of three, three, just don't know these three, write, write it, write down? What 10 things we can do.
Your can do as a community to change the negative perceptions.
Yes, you know what they are some people no matter what you do,
I'm generally speaking, they may they will despise you.
It's okay. It's okay. And remember that
Allah test those that he loves.
And you must understand that Allah is will, will prevail. Nothing happens except the will of Allah. And a muslin never has a victim mentality. In osis Why me? out? Nobody saw some said Noah said Why me? Even in life, he said he turned to Allah. He said to you, what did he do?
He said, maybe there's something about me that I need to change. Instead, I'm saying this to you. And he was a person also had a lot of emotion. At that point in scene when he was very sunny Brian multizilla. That point and see, he cried, as a father would
write so unless to get practical things. And it's very, very important that I would like you as a community as a
School as an institution to do things, right. You understand? So I'm giving you seven minutes please, right?
No one dominates. Right, right. give everyone a chance
right. Okay. The zap mula right.
I want to remind you as I did at the beginning,
that this this whole exercise would be an exercise in futility. If you go back not reflecting on who you are
you understand because you could meet our law now.
And you will be asked there was a crisis in your community, what have you done?
of us should be asked within our capacity.
Right. There is no such thing that I wish I was the leader could do something. Each one of you is a shepherd. Each one of you, each one of you don't have to have a title to be a leader. Some of the people who made the biggest contributions were not given any titles, they went through their own challenges.
So your concern whatever affects one part the Houma if you hurt your ankle affects the rest. Were you affected? How were you affected? Right? So it's important, very, very critical. Right? Very, very critical. I want you to understand that. This being passive and being a spectator is not the way of Islam.
You're going to do something inshallah I pray that you do it inshallah. Okay, tell me what can be done Come on. Who would anyone
your were involved with some activity No, right? I just don't in case you know, I my age I can forget you know, I'm 37 years old now. I know I look 40 happens right? Okay. Anyone please
don't go out say said you know how to say the CD. I didn't know I don't know. You know, I'm no angel. Yes system.
have to share food right? It melts your heart isn't it? Right okay.
fattens you and melts your heart
especially that we went outside
they don't know what it is
they don't know what it means and impossible
to tell how we pray and why
okay I should make a point here right is not enough to know
how we pray.
It is also important to know why we pray we Muslims ourselves not even know these things. Why we pray?
right because the last few that why do you pray? Right? Okay. Continue
So better music then
you can help them
okay, right oftens Yes.
Okay Anyone else?
your kid to volunteer at the gatherings
Yeah, soup kitchen okay.
Invite them for your third
Be conscious of who you are and how you project Islam.
Yes, yes. The drivers whoever engaged with them okay. What else?
Come on. Come on. What about the rest?
Yes, yes, social media, social media. And also how you react to situations is important. Because remember this, our Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was never he was very very compassionate. Was he not? And even to those who mock the deen of Islam.
You know that incident when this few pagans were mocking below the rich attitude he has given the call of roseanne. And then one of them Abu madora went up and he was in a baseless slump asked Who is that person? And he's someone for him. And that person expected to be persecuted and punish our nappy Sal allowed us to recognize he had a beautiful voice. He taught him how to lead the the how to make the call for prayer. That person embraced Islam and was also little later the most in in Makkah to correct yes or no. Right. Look at it. Look at his reaction. Right. So what I'm saying to you is that when you remember everything beautiful come from the deen of Islam. Anything ugly comes from
you. Remember that? Anything Islam is beautiful.
The conduct is beautiful. Our rubbish Rossum was beautiful Yes sir. No beautiful in all aspects of his life. He hardly comes from you and shaytan because the bottom line is no place to be vindictive and spiteful. And and you're an admin you engage with non Muslims you are non judgmental.
What else can be done? Social media is a very powerful instrument right? for social media. One
negative message could really incite people
or a good message inshallah can galvanize people to do the right things is what else command
Yah Yah, yah yah yah yah what they bought in the UK?
Yes, reward anon correct. What else? So what is important is this, right? I would recommend amongst these things, even if through your husbands or whatever, if they're female politicians, invite them,
invite them to your institutional Buddha, invite them,
give them whatever someone says and whatnot right? Then likey right, and just invite them
right and remember this, we are living at a time where your focus should be not so much on conversion,
but on convergence. In other words, you must know what see how you can call, there are some commonalities that you could share, inshallah, that would bring people to the fold of Islam.
At least remember this. Remember the tempo Nabi sallallahu, wasallam, the king of Abyssinia was very sympathetic to Muslims, he was he not? He was very sympathetic. And he gave people a safe passage. Even as Omar went right along with Rokia, may Allah be pleased with them. So what I'm saying to you, it's very important for you to understand them.
Think about it, because the need of the hour this the need of the hour, the need of the hour, is to prevent any future conflicts. The situation is quite volatile. Yeah, yes or no?
It's volatile. Right. It's very, very important. The way our we got to also use opportunity to educate our mothers or fathers from the massage to send the message right and remember for a Muslim, there is no discrepancy between his smile and what in his heart.
There was, this is important buy what else come on.
What else is important?
Get involved public programs. Yes.
You have portray yourself as being involved, also to clear misconceptions about Islam.
Right, right. For for many non Muslims, Sharia means cutting of your ends. That so they don't understand what Sharia is. Right? And maybe preparing a booklet. I'm sure you have that about what Islam is all about.
But yes, come on, please, I want you to your minds must get engaged with this. It must become an ongoing discussion. What you need to do.
Sorry, very important, very, very important that we should remind ourselves that every Muslim you are an ambassador for Islam. It requires one idiot
to do something stupid, that can impact on the rest of the Ummah agree.
All of us ambassadors for the deen of Islam.
Right and we are living here in this country. Right? They asked to be loyalty to the country Yes or no? Right loyalty to the country. You got to contribute to it. We benefited from it. You got to contribute to it.
contribution does not mean that you become less of a Muslim. You become more of a better Muslim. Okay, what else? Come on, please. What about the others?
Yes. Yeah, that's a big problem, isn't it?
Agreed agreed. The accesses a the accesses are extracting effect on a B cell allowed he was seldom remind you even as a neighbor.
Remember this when you become excessive and extravagant. What are you doing? You're hurting the other person's feelings. Agreed.
You're hurting the other person's feelings. Right? Okay. Very good. What else? Come on?
Don't show off. Right. Okay. We're right. Come on. Come on. Come please.
Sorry. I can you
Yes, yeah. Treat your non Muslim employees. Right. For example, they have the celebrations also, right. Don't say okay, fine. You gotta give you leave without pay.
Stuff like that. Right. Okay, what else?
Absolutely. There is no place for coffee.
bromides like these a big difference was gonna be super awesome lenient or not. He was leaving it. Right. Okay. Remember this?
We are more hopeful for Allah's mercy than his rock. Yes. You know, even when Allah reminded us if we do not commit since the educator and some other group, isn't it, because he loves those that turned to him after you committed since allies forgiving?
Right? I mean, there are many many examples right. I'll give you a give you a few more examples. I can go on the old day will give a few more examples, right. They How many of you know about the incident when the beast will allow you or sell them was with the Saba and one of someone brought for him? gave him a bunch of grapes. Honey, we know that incident. Right? They could you narrate it for the rest please.
Once agreed, try.
Was it an old lady? Or?
Or maybe old lady? Okay. Okay, fine. Yeah.
Look at that. Just look at it.
The person brings a bunch of grapes. His habit was a cake first. And he shared it with the Saba. On that day, he never did. He finished it. And the person who gave was satisfied very, very happy right now. viswasam did it. And when he when they asked him his thing, he said worst effect, that if I given you the grade, you might have shown some displeasure, and that would have hurt that person. Look at the sensitivity.
Look at the sensitivity. Right? And Islam remember, is not about how much you know, but how much you show
how much you show how much you show. And when you understand that, inshallah it will make a huge difference in your life. Right. Okay. What are the other things that can be done? What about going to school? Yes, sister, the back?
You have correct? Yes, correct. obeying the law of the country agree. Now what about, for example, saying that, you know, what, maybe on a voluntary will volunteering, going to schools, giving them support, saying that we are prepared to read to the children, books, to promote reading, we as a Muslim community, we we want to support the government's initiative, for example, to promote literacy. So many things can be done many, many things in your locality, it must fall like a wildfire. People need to understand and remember that as much as they say what your one hand does, or the end should not know. But if it is meant to, if it's meant to inspire, if it's meant to change
attitude, you must do it that we show it no harm in train it because the intention is not to show off, but rather to show what we Muslims can do and capable of doing.
You understand right? So, these are fundamental things, I want you to understand that right. So, all you know, when you look at when you look at the B cell allowed your cell phone right, you look at it right let me just give you some broad principles, right. I said that he was forgiving. He was very, very sensitive. He was concerned about the higher goal. right all the time. He understood what his purpose was.
And throughout his interaction with people,
you know, forgot his vision.
Right? And what does the Quran say Pepe sallallahu wasallam.
As a saint as a mercy and also recognize the fact that nappy Salah loud he was seldom was gentle with the people not harsh. The Quran also recognizes it, isn't it?
Right, what else you know about Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he showed no favors.
In other words, he treated people with the quality
What else you know about him,
but else And remember, for example, even when he came to the captors, for example, there were some captives, he looked at the background depending on how much they could afford to get a release he gave them like, they could not afford it, he changed it even still further still, some of them he said, Fine, you train you teach can children and I would release you carry out heavy structures very, very creative, very, very creative in his relationship with people like he and other his sense of justice. What else?
What kind of life he chose poverty, above affluence?
He was more self effacing rather than being in the forefront.
He loved the poor people.
never complain? Yes.
Yes, very important. He said, I'll be with them like this, isn't it.
And when anyone caves is a very important part of his interaction, when anyone came to for help, if he could not help them be pointed them the way you would tell them go to so and so personally, I sent you no one left empty handed.
And he also showed appreciation, he recognized goodness.
For example, He said he liked the attitude was last month for example.
And he was like in in appearance also.
What else? Did he ever complain about donor fatigue?
Any one of them? No, they never complain. Right. So it will take take some questions now. Right. So in conclusion, in conclusion, I mean, I want to please I want to I want you to ask the question. In conclusion, what I want to say is this, that we must, we must move away from our personal self, and realize that you've been sent here for a purpose.
A purpose insha Allah, Allah guide, you make it easy for you to take questions
or contribution. Did you find it useful, but I said, you did. And I'm vanilla. How many of you are coming to my program tomorrow?
Please come, you'll really, really enjoy it. I just give you a brief synopsis. And it's a two day program, where I discuss the leadership of lobbyists and allow you to sell them. I discuss things like self esteem, and emotional intelligence. You know, practical things, I even show you an hour to the art of public speaking. And we look at the last sermon of Novi Sad aloud. He was seldom right, we promote the idea of reading. We look at his qualities. Really, I you know, I am not saying it because I'm doing it. Right. That's one of the reasons actually is but the fact that I know is very, very practical. I did this program just give you an idea. I this program last
the weekend before this, in Toronto. I came back on
Tuesday. Then Wednesday, I went to Tanzania. I came back on Tuesday and I'm here today right? Okay, there have been Maputo right, please I I mean this, you are really going to enjoy my programs are very, very practical. In a sense, yes or no? The practical, right? And and you really find it
inshallah. Great. Okay, so I would like you to come. And this is a point I want to make. See, the point that I want to make to each one of you is the following. If people ask me, what is the biggest issue impacting on the oma, what do you think is the biggest issue you think? Why? Why are we in our situation? Maybe? Why?
There's one yes.
Yes, we broke it ourselves. For me the biggest issue you know the biggest issue, it is not fortuitous, or by chance that the first is to be revealed is ekra.
How many of us have read?
Read? And a few are avid readers?
Yes, maybe our Buddha is special avid readers No, right? But right, but this, right, you find that we have forfeited the habit of reading.
And my turning point has been, I caught a humble collection of three and a half 1000 books at all. very humbled by tipping point for me was when I began to read
right now, we are not prepared to invest in our own education, we are not prepared to invest on our own personal empowerment. Right? And if you say Allah, I want to read so I become an eloquent ambassador for the deen of Islam. So every time you read, it will be like, What? What would it be like for you? Would it be wonderful? Yes or no? You are going to grow? Right? So I'm asking you again, I mean, this because I know the value, right? How many of you, inshallah will now want to come tomorrow, inshallah.
But the answer,
you know, you're not going to come first, right? Now, how many if you're gonna come in to come in Sharla, please, I mean, this. And I mean, it, you got to you got to be a parasite on your knowledge, hours in Canada, and I bought about six to eight books, I must go to a bookshop. I want to grow, I want to learn, open my mind.
Please, please, you got to grow. You got to open your mind. And I assure you, inshallah, after that program, you become your, your self esteem, they enhance your emotional quotient, you'll be inspired to do great things. And one of the things the highlight of my program is the last hour and a half or two, I spend in helping you by six step approach, developing your personal vision and mission is very, very practical. You understand? Right? So please write right now. And I'm saying this to you, I'm saying this to you, right? If, again, I'm asking you, right, I like to see every hand up, you don't mind me. Right? Right. If you don't like what I'm doing, I likey. Right. Right. How many of
you inshallah are going to come for the program?
Unless somebody is high up?
In Sharla, I mean, this, there is no excuse. And Muslim now makes excuses.
Okay, and shall look forward to seeing you right. Question Time.
Is your book on public speaking with a stamp, it's available for sale, inshallah, this is going to be sold at the workshop. Right? It's available for sale. Right now also, which I did not bring, I even have a workbook on this. I also have four CDs, with aspects of it, and even a DVD where I show you practically about each of the skills. Right. Next question.
Okay, we knew I know, you don't ask questions.
Okay, bring it. You can make it.
Okay, right. Okay. All
right. The question is,
what is my view on interfaith dialogue? And what can the institution do? I feel very, very strongly that we need to do that.
Remember that when people are true to the original faiths, if they're true to it, that we are living in a far more harmonious society? Right? There are many friends of mine in the UK, who are involved with interfaith dialogue, even in South Africa is a good thing to do. You understand? Right? So I would encourage it, I would encourage for example, if there are other schools that Christian Schools and other schools in the community to invite them on a visit here. They are even do this what I did in South Africa.
For example, right? How many girls schools are there in this country in Colombo?
Quite a few years, What 10 198?
So, invite one teacher, one teacher and two students from there. Right? One teacher and two students. Look at this. I did this in South Africa for one of the schools, invite them here. Let it become an initiative by the students. Right. Then you show them something about Islam, but then your aim is to create
MIT, each of these schools are joined together for one activity. They do have to do to uplift the community.
Right? Now it doesn't mean that we have Muslim in AP no Far from it. In that week, it says initiative alhuda.
How's that? Good idea? I think is a brilliant idea. Says brilliant. so nicely. So. So you should do that. Right. Any other question? Come on.
Please ask questions.
You must ask questions. You can't be passive. There's something going on in the brain activity is taking place. something happening, right. Okay. Come on.
Like most of the times, language becomes a barrier to reach the people of other communities, learning and speaking that common language in Lanka, right. can build bridges with it? Yes, you should make it compulsory in what we did. In a I was the headmaster of a school alfalah You must go to the website alfalah School in South Africa is the best school in South Africa.
Right. I was the director of the school also. Right.
When I was a headmaster, I made sure we learn the indigenous language of the community. Zulu.
Very important. And if I, I would recommend our Buddha has that language in the school in this introduce the language in
which is good idea. Yes, no. I'm not saying don't wait. Right. Okay. Right. I would recommend that right. Okay.
Okay, usually a Muslim greets another Muslim was unarmed, while ignoring the person next to who is from another faith? How do you think? Yes, you must greet people. It is normal to greet. You know what, how many of you have been to London, put your hands up. You've been to London. You're set in a tube. They're all in the tube. No one smiles at you. They smile at you. They all look very sad. You know.
And they look at you straight in the eye. You can't smile at them. They look at you smiling. They go there. So I you know me I'm a I'm a gregarious social animal from South Africa. One day I went there. I was my friend. I walked into the cube the 1000s of people sitting there. I said, Good morning, everybody. It got a shock of their life. They really they nearly die. Right. And so when I was a so when Jeff said, Hey, brother, I like what you did few stops data. I said, Okay, I'm leaving. Have a good day. I said, No, no, I have a good life. So one day, he followed me, right from South Africa, to Africa. She said you must be from South Africa. I said, Yes, I am. Right. Like you
got to greet. You got to greet you must greet. You must read. Say Hello. How are you? You don't have to have a lengthy conversation. Hello, how are you? My name is so nice. What do you do to finish? have that be? Don't say we are stuck up people we talk. You got to talk. Right? Okay. Anyone else? Come on? Come on. I'm very disappointed. alhuda there are no spaces. No good.
Okay, now you know you are right. You are right. But let me tell you something. Remember this?
There is a story which you might have heard of.
Right there was one person was walking down the seashore.
He noticed at a distance. Someone throwing something back into the sea.
See when they get to the person. And he says to him young boy, what are you doing my boy assists I'm just throwing the seashells, starfish rather back into the sea. Because they will not survive on the shore. But he says there are 1000s of starfish. How can you impact sea bend down? He threw one into the CCC. I made a difference to that starfish.
Each one do what's under your control.
Right? Do whatever is under your control. Remember this? Right? You can do it. Each one you know making a difference. Okay?
Right. Anyone else?
Come on, come on. No good.
Oh, yeah. And also, by the way, I've also got four CD sets here. This four CD set. Yeah, it's on personal empowerment. Right? I've got two types. This is one type is another one on personal empowerment. Then I've got here pre marital conversations. Right? Okay. Right premedical. Then ahead. I've got here, dynamics of marriage, four sets, educating children for the 21st century, parenting, and also a DVD on public speaking. They look quite nice, isn't it? Beautiful? Right. And you like it?
When you like this one?
Right. So anyway, come on. Anyway, I want to say and I am not yet finished. It's a real joy. And I have a special place in my heart for sisters. Because many sisters have an erroneous perception what their role is.
Right, they need to extricate themselves from that mindset. And say, who was the greatest calling Islam?
remember the Lsn she was the one that affirm the life of Nabi sallallahu Sallam many ways.
Someone said here that my mind is empty. I'm so sad about please lead and advice from you. Now, I'm going to just share with you, I'm going to just share with you, you know, this is a point. Whenever you look at any person who is enjoying any kind of success, no matter how you perceive that success to be no matter how you proceed, you assume that it easy, yes or no? You make assumption. But once you engage with that individual, you realize, my gosh, I have no idea is going through this challenges.
Like many people think that I always was this confident person? You know, yes, I was always answered. There's no doubt that's born like right, but was always this confident individual.
I must say.
So there are many turning points. You see. Remember in life, no one can fight your demons except yourself. You know exactly who you are. When you go to sleep,
whether you're a hero or zero.
Right now, if your mind is empty, is quite clear that you're not living consciously and the intentionality you've got to have personal goals, short term and long term goals. Every day must include for example, reading the Quran, of course the Syrah and also other reading.
Secondly, you're going to make sure that you fulfill your Islamic obligations.
Thirdly, myself, five or six good friends, because psychologists have said, revealing is healing.
When you share something, you feel better, right? Next thing, right? Make sure you have no one that is toxic around you.
Some people you meet them, you feel heavy on your chest, right? The next important thing always pursue excellence. unrelenting, pursue excellence, right? Next thing, find a mentor.
Next thing, whatever is affecting you speak about it.
Next thing have self belief.
And last but not least,
try to visualize or understand
what your purpose is. Then your mind is not going to be me. America isn't practical enough. We shall. Okay. Any other questions?
Any other way? Again? I'm asking you Sorry. Right. How many of you may not come back to Sri Lanka?
you'd like me to come back.
How many of you don't go for workshops? either been for a two day workshop in your life?
Or if you've been,
and this gives you a background about me Alhamdulillah amongst the many things I do, I do
which I don't charge, I'm involved radio programs inside Africa four or five radio programs, I help people I do business trading write books, got my own blog
and i and i love you for the sake of Allah you know,
I want you to be happy doing the right things your happiness does not come from earthly pleasure, but it comes from the fact that you are pleasing Allah gives you joy gives you Sakina gives you comfort,
very important, very, very critical.
So, therefore, I say to you, even if you come there and pick up an idea or two that changes you, it will help you right sorry someone had their hands up Yes.
Okay, the challenge at the moment is sadly
divorces have become very right
it's become unbelievable.
Therefore, I wrote this book pre med to have conversations and beyond
you know, to give practical advice after you marry and also about before you marry the kind of question you need to ask I find that young people today are very impatient. They have suffered from emotional deprivation,
the lack of self esteem, the lack of a low EQ emotional quotient, they have unreasonable expectations of marriage.
The man or woman did not understand each other, you got to understand you see a man on average speech 12 and a half 1000 words a day a woman 25,000 words a day in the standards differences. So, the many things there are many challenges impacting on people, right, okay. So, right, is that for me?
Okay. So, there are many challenges, but you know, what, this is part of life life is not meant to be a big challenge
As a young adult at a talk about me
as a young adult, how can we
positively bring a change to the people around us?
Firstly, remember this, if you love yourself, you will change change is the only permanent thing in life right. So, if you want to effect change others, you yourself plus change, you cannot change anyone except yourself.
But you must be such an inspiration the others want to become like you
You understand very important. So, once you do that, it makes a difference. Now, how can you positively impact on people around you, you can positively impact when you understand that we should not treat people with the quality but with the equity, the needs of every person is different. So you respond to the need, understand where they are coming from. And give them the six as I say, give them attention.
Give them positive attributes and give them affection.
Right, amazing. Six, okay. Right. That's Can you please share with us how we can maintain the feeling of self belief as you mentioned early on, right.
Okay. For a lengthy discussion on this come this weekend for a dynamic presentation by Rhys Cammisa, who shares with you What is self esteem, how to develop your own self esteem and you move from low self esteem to high self esteem. They is an erroneous perception that when you you cannot have too much of self esteem. What's the difference? When it does not mean we've got a high self esteem you're perfect. In fact, people with the highest self esteem are humble people. They have strengths and areas for development. Come tomorrow before it is too late. Okay. I try.
Okay, everything keeps going right to your turn. Okay. Right. So the yes
You're going to be challenged sometimes right? You will be challenged. And the idea to maintain the self in self esteem basically is loving yourself recognizing that you are a unique creation of Allah, the other person is not better than you, but is different from you. And then you maintain it by reading by Tony twala. And most importantly, realizing that we go through a challenge. It is not the end in the road, but the bin in the road.
Remember, also, every seat has a past and every sinner has a future.
I want to change but I do not know where to start.
I want to change over the start.
I would recommend the following.
I want you to write down what you need to change about yourself. Sometimes it might you may not understand that you may have four or five points, but they all might be related to one point their belly. So what do you do less to get what you can do immediately. You have a long term and a short term plan, right? Or go to people that you that you we where you see the change and tell them this what you like to do. Firstly, to change to change your life. The only way to change your life is to change your routine.
That's it to do a lifestyle audit, isn't it to change your routine.
Okay, right. Right. Now, I want to ask you something, right? I want to ask you something. Could I ask you something? Right? If there are say
400 birds? Yeah, how many birds
400 birds, right? Okay. 400 birds. And I say why are these birds captured here in captivity? So I say Oh, why did you open the windows? I don't like to see the birds. Yeah. And and for birds. How many birds for birds decide to fly how many birds decide to fly for how many birds are left
300 and wrong. Still 400 birds, you know why? I like it. I gotcha. I lakia gotcha. You know why? Because I said they decided to fly I never said they flew
in you know, I'm saying that we sometimes make decisions what to change and make decisions, you write it down a decision is still remains right in the vortex of your mind, unless you implement it or go ahead with it. So you got to change your routine.
And believe in it. And once remember this, as someone said, I can understand. I think it was Mandela, who said this gentleman Dr. Nelson Mandela, he said was I want you to know, I can understand when a child is afraid of the dark, but I cannot forgive a man who is afraid of the light.
Right. Okay. So you start off what you can do. Right. And, and, and it will be difficult.
difficult. Amongst the first things I said to him that I would like to jog. I tried to jog five kilometers a day. After budget. I like to jog. Okay. And
I don't make an excuse. Well, I went to see Lanka It was hot adding jobs. I want a job. In fact, I might be this afternoon. Right to job right now. Yes, if you're jogging after a long time your knees are going to pain isn't it? Right But you got to persevere. After six weeks it becomes an automatic part of your life. So you got to focus on yourself and and get guidance get a mentor right you organize yourself Believe in yourself make it your priority.
How do you purchase your books and your CDs?
only got one set yet right one set yet. And but if you want to purchase these come tomorrow for the workshop.
before it is too late.
The time is now.
How do you deal with toxic people? If you live with them? You can't avoid
this make the wall for you. Right okay. Right. How to deal with toxic people. You know what
Remember these words, no one can diminish you without your permission.
how small you feel depends on you.
You do not get married to be happy, you are happy and you get married.
You must not allow anyone to crawl underneath your skin.
There are three ways of responding to people far as I'm concerned three ways. One, listen with your heart and benefit from the knowledge is someone who is critical of you listen, they say thank you, brother, sister. I was not aware of it. Thank you, the second person who might be trivial to say thanks for sharing your information.
The third person is you when he speaks or he allows you to go from here one way out.
What we tend to do instead of us reversing our condition we rehearse it played all the time. And you know mind
you we went when
they need me and immediately if you meet your friend is so what's wrong with you? You say for 10 years, man, she told me it's quiet.
Come on, have a balance. You understand what I'm saying to you? Right? toxic people need help. toxic people need help make dua for them. Now you got to find out what how come they are like that. And how come there is to know more about toxic people how to deal with it. Come tomorrow for the denial.
no immediate. I mean, I help you. They face a condition called post traumatic stress. I deal with them rarely. Rarely I'll share with you some practical things come tomorrow.
Amen. I love you all for sake of Allah. Do you love me policy? Are you happy I came here today. And I'm also happy if you're not happy. So I'm excited. But when I go home, my wife will ask me How was it? I said no, darling.
I enjoyed it. What about them? I say I'm not worried but I enjoy
make up for it. My pillar of strength.
Tell everyone I don't mind the whole world stops talking to me longest my wife and I call the shoe shoe bouboulina shoe shoe longer, she's happy. And in a state Alhamdulillah. When it comes to for people from other religious religions, when they come asking for money Excel is for the richest function, the committee work? Do we give them money and help them? You see, you know what, you know, let me tell you, it's a good question to ask. Right. And I I do not ever get into fixing issues as it were right? I think you could look at creative ways of supporting them in different days. Maybe they got a project to say to have a drill or
borehole whatever look at in those ways in a stage. But I'm not too sure you need to get the local scholars to give you their fatwa in terms of helping them when it comes to their religious festivals in the state. But you can help them in different ways. They've got an educational institution where you can buy books, and books and whatnot. So I would not I'm a non controversial person and stick to that right. Anything else? Anything else? Right? Okay.
So, just as a
reminder to all of you is that
a Muslim is not stung by the same old twice, you know that.
No, two days are the same. If you're going to go back today, no different for whatever yesterday was the need for tomorrow then.
In fact, your highest moment of spirituality should be when Allah calls you.
I'm looking forward to your participation tomorrow. I mean, this right.
You'll enjoy is interactive. Right? It does be unhampered in law. Nice technical love for this. I've done this program in Brisbane, in Melbourne, Sydney Canberra, in in
Kuala Lumpur in Canada. I've done this program and it's good you know, I always I love to meet with scholars. Right?
meet with them you get enriched by them okay right So one more time How many of you are coming in tomorrow inshallah for the program
has no more double why why they suddenly went down
again on the discount this This presents a fallacy
out if you say you're not coming because you're getting married tomorrow and you know, did they come with your husband you can learn together anyway right? Joseph qumola right. does Allah bless you all may you have a wonderful life inshallah. Right and
and those that are interested looking at the CDs, you can look at it in the book. And and if you're not coming tomorrow, you can get one of your colleagues to purchase it for you. All right. Okay.
Good once again with us for another motivational talk in the future.
Oh, six sisters members interested in purchasing tickets.
workshop this weekend? The making of a leader.
my dua for you in Sharla.
Is that each one of you?
Has self belief.
We have got Islam on the platter.
Islam on the platter, no matter what we go through is nothing compared to what the Sahaba window
the 40 days of CGI, the Osman went through his heart wrenching, he never forsake Allah. He never forsake his love for the Quran.
What I'm saying to you, we caught it easy.
Right? And Muslim never complains. So what I'm saying to you, right? Please, there is no such thing as tomorrow for a believer is only now only now, every opportunity for you to buy books, to listen to lectures, go for it. And the critical thing your engagement must be what do I need to change in my life? What do I need to change to become a better person? You understand? Right? And just give you this one incident? Or a two incidents? Two? Right.
Okay. 111 The second incident only sharing tomorrow. Right? The incident was when I was at school, right? When I was in school. I was like, you know, I like a clown, you know, clown, but I was a shy clown unicycle, right? And those days, you know, our parents were different. My father told the teachers, the flesh is yours. The bones are mine.
in me, so you could not complain to a bear. So anyway, so
you won't believe this. I was an average student of English average. Right? One teacher inspired me. After his inspiration. Eight years after that, I became the chairman of the English Society of South Africa.
I should be afraid to speak in public. The biggest crowd I spoke to was 10,000 people in London.
I only feel why. Because I took ownership.
I'm saying this to you don't say I'm a female. Yeah. So what? Your status higher than males.
Nice. Yes or no?
Right. So I'm saying this to you. Like you. There was a time. There was a time when students of knowledge traveled 1000s of miles. Looking for scholars. Now scholars are traveling 1000s of miles looking for students is a sad indictment on our community in our society.
A very sad indictment.
If you're not prepared to make a sacrifice, you'll not gain anything.
And I'll give you an example. Without it becoming too patronizing. As an example, people ask me, How do I manage my travels?
How do I manage? I do it. I don't like the traveling to be honest with you. People have a romantic notion, the plain of that. And so most constipated people are in the plane, you see them. Right, right. I hate the traveling, but it's a means allies given us. But I love the interaction.
I tweet. We don't know. We don't know whose life you might touch whose life you might affect. So my question to you in the end, how many of you believe strongly that perhaps you need to do some things differently? Put your hands up?
Those are the hands up I'm assuming either you're sleeping or you're you're paralyzed. So it's okay. To not be right. So May Allah bless you and protect you right? Right. Right. So inshallah we make a little dry inshallah, right in the llama like Pretoria saloon Allah Nebbiolo cinema Salonika Salima tasneem
your lab protect all the beloved daughters and brothers in Sri Lanka. give them strength to Allah. Let them understand what the purpose is. They are indeed ambassadors for the deen of Islam. Yalla Yalla take us to you we are loving we are strongest of faith yada yada yada Muslims are suffering throughout the world. Y'all make it easy for them to make it easy for them yada yada give us a class give us sincerity of purpose yada yada.
We find this one Arabic Arabic
for some Muslims.
Who wants like to look at the CDs and all that you can come in? You want to look at it?
No, okay. No problem. Okay.