Engaging your Children, Parenting & Marital Relations

Edris Khamissa

Date:

Channel: Edris Khamissa

File Size: 2.69MB

Episode Notes

Share Page

Transcript ©

AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Thus,no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

00:00:03--> 00:00:08

shovel ready we, as are saying talk about the youth.

00:00:09--> 00:00:24

Or many people, scholars, parents, teachers are always complaining about them. We blame them for everything. We don't try to understand them. They used to have many challenges.

00:00:25--> 00:00:48

The shopping malls sent us the hearts and minds. They live in a virtual world almost the cyber bubble. They said us by the media. And as it is said, whoever controls the media controls your mind in our head, whoever controls the media controls your mind.

00:00:49--> 00:00:55

Now, instead of us lecturing to them, sermonizing and pontificating

00:00:57--> 00:01:30

is time we sat back and listen to them. Ask them, what would they do differently when they become a father, or a mother? And my gosh, they give you fresh responses. We need to understand them. They were they living in is diametrically different from the world in which most of us lived, is fast pace. days in tempo. There is no time to sit and reflect.

00:01:31--> 00:02:01

We are living in that reality. By does not mean I'm not condoning the action of some youth. I'm not condoning it. Neither am I condoning the action of the vast majority of parents who have little or no connection with their own children. They do not even interact with them, we understand them. So I want to basically make three suggestions. How to say to fathers and mothers, reengage your children,

00:02:02--> 00:02:03

connect with them.

00:02:04--> 00:02:07

Find out from them, what is it?

00:02:08--> 00:02:12

The second thing, I want you to give them self belief.

00:02:14--> 00:02:33

Massage the self esteem, make them feel good about who they are. And last but not least, through your own action. And remember this parents, it is not so much who you want your children to be when they want to be you what I'm saying, all in law,

00:02:34--> 00:02:45

be the example for them. They will mimic your behavior. how true it is. An apple doesn't fall too far from the tree

00:02:52--> 00:03:15

as salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Yes, it's me again, I hope. I'm not your recurring nightmare, you there. But anyway, I want to speak about something how often in life, sometimes one succinct, saying something short, has a profound impact on you.

00:03:16--> 00:03:37

I remember at a particular workshop in London, I mentioned that parenting is not so much your relationship with your child, but your relationship with your spouse. Many of them found it mind boggling. The four is difficult to make the paradigm shift.

00:03:38--> 00:04:28

And I remember there was one lady who attended my workshop in London, and weeks later, or months later conducted another workshop. And she came to me and she said, Brother, you please, I will not make it for this workshop. But I need to give you some kind of feedback. She said, when you said that parenting is not so much your relationship with your child, but your relationship with your spouse, my husband and I made a commitment. What was the commitment, we made a commitment that we need to relook at our lives, we need to make sure that instead of us using snarling words, you use her in words, words of love, will show affection towards each other. We show social etiquette. We

00:04:28--> 00:04:35

treat each other with dignity. She said when we started doing that, what a transformation.

00:04:36--> 00:04:48

We could see for our children, a different response, a more loving response, a more respectful response to remember parents. You as a father, as a mother.

00:04:49--> 00:04:59

Try to model that behavior. inspire your children to do what is right. Promote the sacred institution of marriage. Yes.

00:05:00--> 00:05:25

I'm not saying that you and your husband must agree on everything my gosh if you do that such a boring wedding marriage it is Yes indeed. What I'm saying to you, you can disagree. But you do not have to be this agreeable. This is Cammisa st you a salaam aleikum. haha it's all left you