Mufti Menk – Go Easy on Your Child
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Salam aleikum, my brothers and sisters, Children are a gift from Allah subhanho wa taala. Many people don't have children, if you don't have children, that is the choice of Allah subhanho wa taala. While you keep trying to have these children, we should not enter into territory that is prohibited in order to get children by hook or crook. So there is a limit that you could actually go to, in order to try and get children or bear the children. But if not consider adoption. To a degree, the adoption in Islam is more about taking care of children who are not really yours. And you actually look after them because they're often because they may be homeless, etc. And the idea
is to earn a reward from Allah subhanho wa taala. Not that you can boast and brag that we have adopted and so on. But what I'd like to say today is go easy on your children, we're living in an environment that is very, very difficult. The pressures, of society of technology of everything is absolutely tremendous. It's on another level. So if you're too hard and harsh upon your children or on your children, you may just lose them, because they may snap out of the relationship with you out of frustration, they may not want to talk to you, they may not want to sit with you, simply because your approach needs improvement. We cannot change what Allah has ordained, but the way we
communicate it should be the best possible way. And this is why when Allah speaks about speaking to those who don't believe at all, and addressing them, or presenting a beautiful argument, Allah says Jardine home bility, here Eisen, when you are going to engage them in this back and forth of discussion, then do so in the best possible way. If this is the case with those who don't believe what about your own children? What about those who are living with you, when talking to them, try and engage them in the best possible way convinced them to do what you want them to do, rather than yell at them, scream at them, and try and force them to do things. They will hate what they're
doing. I have come across many young girls who say I hate the hijab, simply because my mum used to force me to do it. Now one might ask, Well, what should I have done? Well, the true answer is you should have communicated, spoke and convinced them and inshallah help them in a beautiful way. You don't just say, do that. And that's it. They may do it. But as they grow older, are they convinced? That's the question. So in order to protect yourself from all of this, make sure you engage with these children in a beautiful way. Go easy on them and and learn about what Islam says. They get to a certain age, the age of seven, you slowly remind them about prayer before that, and at that age,
you let tell them to pray. And at the age of 10, you can become a little bit more strict when it comes to the issue of prayer. You talk to them in a way that is convincing and at the same time, as they grow older, you can apply different types of pressure on them to pray on condition, that you're not making matters worse. May Allah Almighty grant all our children is May Allah protect all of them and protect all of us and help us to utilize the best possible way to speak to our children about what is important for them and to help them stay away from that which is wrong in a in a lovely way. Giselle, como la que Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah