Responsibility of Parents

Ebrahim Bham

Date:

Channel: Ebrahim Bham

File Size: 43.72MB

Episode Notes

Share Page

Transcript ©

AI generated text may display inaccurate or offensive information that doesn’t represent Muslim Central's views. Thus,no part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever.

00:00:06--> 00:00:11

hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah was salat wa salam ala mandanna Viva

00:00:12--> 00:00:18

Ababa dofollow Villa humanos shaytani R rajim Bismillah your Walkman where he

00:00:19--> 00:00:20

is you

00:00:21--> 00:00:22

know coo

00:00:23--> 00:00:36

coo coo coo coo moi li Canara Bacala Tala what more Athleta V Sarathi was Tavira on a lattice Luca is called Nana cook.

00:00:37--> 00:00:39

Taco Salah will ask him

00:00:41--> 00:01:29

my dear respected Allah ma elders, brothers, mothers and sisters who are listening and also the guest of honor today our beloved children who are in front Alhamdulillah it is not been for the children we would not have gathered here today. We are gathered here because of them. They are the main people in the program today. We are celebrating them hamdulillah so we think Allah subhanho wa Taala for our children. Fellas, we firstly we thank Allah Tala for the favours Allah has bestowed upon us. And we sense the rotations upon our beloved Nabil Kareem sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. There is no doubt that Islam is the Greatest Name of Allah subhanho wa Taala has granted us and we have to

00:01:29--> 00:01:53

preserve this Islam we have to preserve the Imam that Allah Allah has bestowed upon us and Allah Tala has granted us and Allah Allah has given us this Iman and it is not as if we are entitled to it. Or we are worthy of it is only Allah to Allah has grace that He is granted us human and we make dua that Allah Tala ki password

00:01:54--> 00:02:26

and Allah Tala not only keep us with him and may Allah make us the means of the Eman of our children. Today one of the greatest responsibilities if not the greatest, is to preserve the man of our children. Our children My dear respected elders and brothers are great favors of Allah you know the via cream sauce Salam has referred to children as the flowers of Allah Tada you know when required and resource them said their fly of flowers of above. And maybe a crimson allows us to love children.

00:02:28--> 00:03:04

The acronym SOS slim used to play with children. Many times the acronym SOS Lim used to be going on the streets and the B occurring sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to see the children and the reoccurring sosman was to join them. And maybe a cream sauce them used to play with him for a while. Today really, we don't echo the sentiments and example of maybe a cream sauce I mean many things, even with regard to our interaction with children and three I would like to make mention of some of the responsibility that we as parents and his community have to our children.

00:03:05--> 00:03:50

Firstly is to show them the love Maybe a cream sauce them with great love. And especially with regard to the grandchildren Sumangala the children of Nebia cream sauce from grew up at a time when the via Kareem sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was undergoing great trials and great challenges in the beginning of Islam, establishing Islam and I will relate one two incidents with regard to them. But maybe a Kareem saw Saddam was in Medina, the time in Libya, Kareem saw slums grandchildren, you know, came onto the scene. And they were the ones that came in the latter portion of nebbia cream sauce drums life. So the two grandchildren were very beloved to nebbia cream sauce. As it Hassan was

00:03:50--> 00:04:07

saying that we allow travel when maybe a cream sauce from passed away they were about seven years of age more or less. Right. So maybe a Kareem saw some had tremendous love for his grandchildren. And by and large, you know, we in our, in our circles, we also speak about the love of grandchildren.

00:04:08--> 00:04:10

They see the grandchildren or the Prophets

00:04:12--> 00:04:39

the we make an investment the investment in the children and the grandchildren or the profits. And there's one beautiful thing and I can you know lay claim to that. He said grandchildren they fill a space in your heart, which you never knew was empty. Correct children fill a space in your heart which we never knew was empty. And we are cream sauce them head this unit via cream sauce them used to play with his grandchildren to such an extent. He used to keep them on his back.

00:04:40--> 00:04:54

And sometimes you find that nebbia came so slim used to let them ride on his bed. So one day, Asahi came to me occurring so awesome. And he saw it was I think it was as he was saying that he allowed on the back of maybe a cream sauce.

00:04:56--> 00:04:59

And the person told as it was saying Oh you are so fortunate

00:05:00--> 00:05:25

You are mounting and you are on the bed of your grandfather who is the Nebby of Allah, the greatest of Allah's creation. And look at our nebbia cream sauce the made his grandchild. feel important. He said so he told me it's awesome. And he told us it will say that what a great mount you are on the back of nebbia cream sauce from synnovia cream sauce from turned around and told the savvy what a great rider I got on my bed.

00:05:26--> 00:05:33

He made him feel so special. So what a great rider I got on my bed. And one incident I read in the book of

00:05:34--> 00:06:11

has asked him to be alone that I know by salary somebody who has written some very beautiful books on the history and great personalities entry you find many of his books in the Haramain when you go to the book shops, and I would recommend that you start reading those books about historical personalities. So in this one instead he made mentioned he said one occasion maybe a cream sauce when went out on a journey. And hazard Hassan and Hussein vary a lot on what crime so the mere cream sauce from couldn't take the kind so he went into the tent of other Fatima and he said why are my grandchildren crying? Where are they crying?

00:06:12--> 00:06:29

So, let me give you also another aspect with regard to this incident. Through the time of Marwan he was the governor of Medina. Now that time there was some tension between the binomials and the Bani Hashim. So Marwan came to Abu Huraira the Ultra and said

00:06:30--> 00:06:34

Why do you show so much of love and consideration for others?

00:06:35--> 00:07:20

When I'm the governor of Medina, so Abu Huraira be allowed to run when I can make mention of this incident with great pride because we as in the matter of Abu Huraira Mashallah. The merger is named budget Abu Huraira. So Abu Huraira the ultra was lying down. So he got up and said Marwan don't ever rebuke me or say anything to me with regard to the love I have, as I said, Do you know why I love him? He said, Then he repeated this incident which I was making mention of. He said there will be a Kareem saw salaam was weighing in a journey issue as Saddam Hussein crime, he went into the tent, and he said, Why are my children grandchildren kind? So the Fatima said, It is beyond me. They are

00:07:20--> 00:07:31

trying because there is no water and they are thirsty. That's why they cry. It's in a desert. There's no water. Brothers. Do you know what maybe a cream sauce from did? He put Asteron Hussein on his laptop.

00:07:33--> 00:07:34

And he took out his tongue.

00:07:35--> 00:07:37

And he made them suck the tongue

00:07:38--> 00:07:58

made them suck his tongue. Now either because of the moisture of the tongue, or either I read one someone Now recently I read this aspect of this incident. But Allah Tala might have put water as a medical appointment is awesome. They set the time and they set the eight pages.

00:07:59--> 00:08:23

This is our Nabil Kareem so slim loved as you say. This is how he loves children. He couldn't bear seeing them crying. He said why my grandchildren cry. Brothers. This is how we are supposed to love our children. And you see, but together with the love, I think it's important for us to make mention that together with a loved children our great our great responsibility.

00:08:24--> 00:08:33

The greatest responsibility we have upon our children is to give them proper upbringing to bring them upon with iman.

00:08:34--> 00:09:00

That is the greatest responsibility of the parents more than anything else. Today, Muslim parents regard it as a responsibility to look after the financial needs. They feel it that no we have to provide for the clothing, the food and the basic necessities of the children. But very few of us regard it as a responsibility upon us

00:09:01--> 00:09:20

to provide for the spiritual upbringing of our children to keep them upon Imam Allah Tala in the Quran in the verse which I recited said what a more athletic club is solid was to be rally command your family to perform Salah and you also be

00:09:21--> 00:09:29

steadfast upon it. So you can expect to have to be at have children, when you yourself are not a role model.

00:09:30--> 00:09:52

So many times parents do this mistake they expect the children to behave but they themselves are not role model. Therefore Allah Allah says, I command you to perform salad and I command you to tell your family to perform sir what more alchemy salad was studied Alia command your family to perform certain you also be steadfast upon it landless

00:09:54--> 00:09:56

I don't ask you for the risk.

00:09:57--> 00:09:59

Now that was to cook Alaska.

00:10:00--> 00:10:18

that says I will provide so for them, I will provide for them they risk is written, sometimes the risk is written that I will provide for them via the parents. Allah will give the parents risk because of the children.

00:10:20--> 00:10:57

Allah will give you this because of your children. Let me a cream sauce limit said many times, you are given risk because of the vulnerable people who are dependent upon you for instance, you think that your business is doing very well. Allah is giving it to you people via for children, Allah is written the risk via you. So, literacy is nothing but Allah Allah says, I will provide for them but I want you to give them good therapy and I want you to command them to perform so that to get a beautiful we are lateralized made mention of it. In the Holy Quran. Allah subhanho wa Taala is made mentioned

00:11:02--> 00:11:54

I'm calling to shahada has an approval mode. I'm confirmed shahada is the other Jacobian mode. Is a call that he when he Mata Abu do I mean by the Kowloon Abu ala haka, where Allah Abba Ebro, Ema is Ma il, where his Hatha Illa who ADA on Abdullah who Muslim on utterances where you present a letter is making us aware of the importance of the message Allah has given us where you present at the time of Iacobelli salat wa salam is death either had a approval mode, the time of death, or that Jacoba is salat wa salam had his children in front of him. And what did as that jacobellis salat wa salam ala to his children. How today, if you and I, for example, we were in our situation, and we are

00:11:54--> 00:12:33

giving parting advices to our children. I wonder what type of parting advices we will give, what type what type of parting advices we will give and compare that with a parting advice Iacobelli salaam gave to His children. Perhaps we will call our children and he will say you will must live with Muhammad, you know, Do this, do that live with your muhabba do this do that, you know, I've got certain assets, which I didn't tell you about you know, I got a bank account maybe in London, which nine I need to tell you about because I'm leaving this world. Today is a joke that goes wrong. Something like this. A person one day was on his deathbed. And he called he has three children's. So

00:12:33--> 00:12:59

he said, Muhammad, where are you? So Muhammad felt that no, his father is on his deathbed. He is calling him so he came quickly. Then he said Abdullah Abdullah, where you are bill also came. Papa is very sick. Maybe Papa want to give us parting advices then he call he had one other particular child. And that child's name was Brian O'Brien, where are you? So you blame us who came running? So when everyone was there, they started maybe he wants to give us parting advice. So he said if all three of you are here who's in the shop?

00:13:01--> 00:13:14

If all of you are using the show who's looking after their business, maybe our situation is like that. But look at what Allah Tala says about as it was salaam, when he told unto his children ma Bulunan embody. Who are you going to worship after?

00:13:16--> 00:13:42

Brothers, I want you to think about this. Every one of you must think about this. Who is asking the question? And maybe of Allah Jacoba whose father was also a navy of Allah is happening, sir. His grandfather was who he primaries salah, Abu Ambia, the father of all the Gambia, his uncle was, is mightily salat wa salam amongst his children, is also a levy as a beautiful police.

00:13:43--> 00:14:27

This is such a levy with such a pedigree. And what question is asking a question that you and I will see. What do you expect me to ask my children who they're going to worship and the Muslims? Don't they know they're supposed to worship Allah a question that when I will feel shy to ask, but he asked a question who are you going to worship after me? Karuna Abu Inaka EULA abaga they all replied, that we will worship you know, Carlo Naboo Allah aka your your your Allah, and Allah in the Lord of our great grandfather and the great legacy that we hold ILAHA Wahida the one Allah subhana wa Tada when a hula hoop was the moon, and we will submit to him that if that was his greatest

00:14:27--> 00:14:44

concern, and then he heard this answer, can you imagine how you must have died a satisfied person? But there's two ways regard the aspect of Dean as important as this. Two we regard that this must be the most important thing for our children

00:14:45--> 00:14:50

in medieval Quran, as a professor Dalio has made mention of the incident over the use of police

00:14:51--> 00:14:52

and in this

00:14:57--> 00:15:00

you see that very interesting incident very we all know

00:15:00--> 00:15:12

long as it was super easy that was salam was away from Iacobelli salam for 40 years will be at that Aina woman or cousin. He cried so much that his eyesight God rose out of the separation, abusive police.

00:15:14--> 00:15:15

And

00:15:16--> 00:15:39

so in eventually of course Yusuf Alayhi salat wa salam was sold into slavery, he became the most important person in king of Egypt. He was in control of the entire Egypt. So when he eventually revealed himself to his brothers, and he told unto his brothers, you know, when he told unto his brother Calaca to borrow for ultimate use of Wi Fi and Antonia

00:15:40--> 00:15:57

so now he's you can imagine the brothers of Yusuf Ali salaam they didn't know him super Islam is now they are addressing him. He is the most important person in in in Egypt and he told them Do you remember what you did with use of when you were

00:15:58--> 00:16:01

to trim down your well you sold him into slavery.

00:16:02--> 00:16:08

Then they said how do you know about use of and they looked carefully and they said in Nicola Anta use of

00:16:10--> 00:16:34

you or use of? And he said no use of hoo ha Yes, I'm used to when this is my brother. Cadman Allahu Alina, Allah his favorite acid and that Allah has granted me such great respect after such a great time. So after all of that Malama Phosphatidyl ricotta abou in Nila reviews today. So the use of asked about his father, Jacoba Israel. He said Jacoba Islam has become life.

00:16:35--> 00:16:51

So Jacoba Islam is in can earn far away from Egypt. So then Yusuf alayhi salam gave his quota is it put it upon the eyes of my father for Tata Pasila. He will his eyesight will be restored.

00:16:52--> 00:17:38

So he's, so then they left from them, so when they left from Egypt, so jacobellis that was salam said in de la IgD, rahayu. So I can smell the fragrance of Yusuf, I can smell the fragrance of Yusuf so the people who around him set Allah in Nicola physiological Kadeem that you are going to straight 40 years ago, he was a way where you can smell the fragrance of Yusuf alayhi salatu salam for Lama and Jaya Al Bashir, who al Kawada What do you protect the basilar. So when the people came, his brothers came, and they brought the glad tidings Yusuf Alayhi Salatu Salam is alive. And they put the quota on on his eyes, and his eyesight was restored. So he said, Allah Markkula, come, they will

00:17:38--> 00:18:11

not tell you. Allah gave me knowledge, which in the Allahu Allah Tala, which we didn't give you was amazing. When he was there, when they threw him into the well that time. He couldn't smell your super restaurants to the fragrance. But when he was in Egypt, and they were coming back, all of a sudden the smells, the fragrance of Yusuke or Islam, because Allah Tala did it. When Allah Tala wanted him to smell your fragrance, and Natera did it. And when I didn't want it, although he was in the vicinity when he was in the world, he couldn't smell the fragrance of real super Islam. But the point I want to make, he asked him,

00:18:13--> 00:18:16

tell me, how is my use of

00:18:17--> 00:18:30

I came to know after 40 years that he is alive. How is he who said he is the king of Egypt. He is the most important person in Egypt. Everything happens by His Command.

00:18:31--> 00:18:37

He has so much of power and authority and Jacobo ASAM said, I'm not asking you

00:18:39--> 00:18:45

about him being the most important person. I am asking you how is the man of Microsoft?

00:18:46--> 00:19:07

How he's the man of my use of? So they say that hamdulillah Eman also is well, then kobori Salam think that Allah, He said, I'm not asking you how much of wealth is God? He's got power. And I'm asking you what is in mind? For others, I'm asking you Do you have the same concern? Do we all have the same concern about our children?

00:19:09--> 00:19:16

This is what we as parents have to realize it in today's time. We all know the challenges our

00:19:17--> 00:19:29

community and our society and the situation and the environment has thrown up. Now, as parents we have a greater responsibility.

00:19:30--> 00:19:51

You know, I read one day a book somewhere I read somewhere I read at the time I went long time ago into CNA, they tell us to go to CNA it used to be sort of one like an excursion for you to go and see the different types of books and I saw one book I even purchased it was 20 odd years back. I don't even know if I got it in my in my bookshelf. And I just like the title. Parenting isn't for cowards.

00:19:53--> 00:20:00

Parenting isn't for cowards. If you want to be a parent, then you have to realize the responsibility of being a parent is not

00:20:00--> 00:20:44

Only the joy, it is a responsibility. For others the greatest responsibility is the Imam and today the Imam can be preserved. I'll just give you a few points. One of it is the mucked up, the metabolism progresses. But I can't overemphasize the importance of this madrasas. You and I take it lightly. But this is the training ground for our children to preserve the environment. Don't take this octopus lightly, great, great. Hola. Hola. Malik has had more than double Assam that we are actually more than a monsoon Amaya actually, they have made mentioned with regard to the importance of mcta the primary Islamic education, do you say either see to it that your children are

00:20:44--> 00:21:27

Islamically, educated, or otherwise bear the consequences of Eliyahu Billa perhaps they will become worthless. They will turn away from Islam. And this is the reality. You know, many times we heard from people, people who have been to, you know, South America the Jamaat, he went there, and they saw Muslims, and today then a Muslim saw them they said our grand grandparents used to dress like this. Our grandparents used to read the Quran. Our grandparents used to do this. They had lost the human, although I've heard from authority, authoritative sources. That is the people who went from Arabia to go and settle down in South America. Many of them were not only Arabs, they were children

00:21:27--> 00:21:50

of Sahaba. But because they didn't see to the Caribbean and the Islamic education of the children. After one or two generations, there was no Islam that if we are not going to keep our children in but it's us and in terms and show them the importance of it. That could be a possibility that India will be loving Allah Tala protecting

00:21:51--> 00:22:31

our children could also become like that. You see to it that we pay attention to our madrasah today, this is Mrs. Agile sir. I would like to repeatedly emphasize the importance of this. And this, you know, is amazing. I was reading an article as I was going so right now I'm coming here I'm going to speak in a Jelsa. So I read one or two articles. So one article reading said that the first metab was in the house of Fatima Binti Hatha, right. Fatima bint al Khattab was the sister of Amara Villatoro. Now, we all know the incident. That was this was perhaps one of the first victims that Omar Viola Turner was set out to win assess the need to be a cream sorcerer. He set out to

00:22:31--> 00:23:12

assessment and resource them on the way he met someone who said we are you going I'm going to kill Alia to be learned to be a cream sorcerer. He has caused a great amount of division amongst us. So someone said leave Mohamed going look after your own family. So the person said What are you saying? He said your sister and brother in law said he'd been Zaid have also accepted Islam. Omar became enrage he became so angry and he went towards the house of the system. What did he What did he see? You know the incident? What did he hear? He saw her Barbara via loutra teaching his sister and brother in law, the Quran, the same thing that we're doing with them. So above the the ultra was

00:23:12--> 00:23:18

teaching them the Quran. So Omar are they allowed to know could not contain his anger he burst into them. And he beat his sister.

00:23:19--> 00:23:56

She was completely in blood. And Saeed bin Zayed also was also in completely in blood. Then afterwards afterwards he was also the system says Alma, you can beat us our Qi Imam has come into our hearts, we will never leave him and we will never leave any money. So Omar felt ashamed. He said, What were you read? What were you reading? So they said we were reading the Quran. He said, Let me read it. So the sister said, No, you can't read it until you make Buzu. And Omar made Hulu and he read the first page of surah Taha And subhanAllah when he came to Indonesia, in any analog, Willa

00:23:58--> 00:24:00

in any in any analog with

00:24:02--> 00:24:41

an f5 Houdini, well, how can we solve that and if you read one page of the Holy Quran, Omar was a jeep. His heart was full of sincerity. And his heart was full of commitment when he was committed towards wrong he was committed to that. When he became a Muslim, he became fully committed to this Subhanallah one page he became a Muslim. And what Where did he come? He came into a place where they were learning to read the Quran. Some people see that as perhaps one of the first examples of a mucked up. So brothers, keep in mind this is very important. And also with regard to the aspect of, you know,

00:24:42--> 00:24:48

parenting, maybe I'll just give you one or two examples and one or two tips, brothers, children.

00:24:50--> 00:24:52

They love to be noticed.

00:24:53--> 00:24:55

No matter how much they show.

00:24:57--> 00:25:00

Independence children love to be

00:25:00--> 00:25:15

NOTICE children need to be affirmed. Children need to be validated. And we as parents, we need to give them that love, we need to give them the affirmation, we need to give them the validation.

00:25:16--> 00:25:30

And if we do not do you'll see, for example, you will find in children many times, you know, you see a small child that growing up, and maybe it's three, four or five years and got a small sibling, and the sibling becomes the center of attention.

00:25:31--> 00:25:44

And sometimes you, you will find that there are a small group of children, and all of a sudden one of the church that children will you know, when there are a lot of children, that one child will misbehave.

00:25:45--> 00:26:13

And in the midst of all the children, especially when there's an elder sibling, and there's a younger sibling who is now captured the attention of the entire family does eldest child starts misbehaving? Psychologists tell us that one of the reasons why they will do that is because children would like to be noticed, even as bad children or even as misbehave children, rather than being ignored as good children.

00:26:15--> 00:26:57

So why do we make this? Why would they create a sin? Because you are ignoring them? All of a sudden, the attention is going to the news troubling. And this particular Chinese must be why he's been ignored. So what does it do? It creates a scene to be able to be affirmed to be validated to be recognized. Children would do that. Can you imagine? I have recently done a whole lot of series, you know, on drug addiction. And, you know, I tried to look at the causes, I went into one support group who are helping the people from recovering addicts, etc. And while doing research on this and speaking to people, one person told me an amazing thing. One counselor who was doing this drugs

00:26:57--> 00:27:23

thing, told me one day amazing thing. He said that, you know, he asked one child, you know, why are you hanging out with friends who are such bad company, they are doing wrong things? Why are you hanging out with them? What's wrong with you? Do you realize the consequences? So he said the child told me something that struck me so much. The child told me he said

00:27:24--> 00:27:26

My friends make me feel special.

00:27:28--> 00:28:09

My friends, make me feel special. And then the counselor told me said I realized that this particular child was looking to feel special. And it took the friends to make him feel special. Why didn't the parents in the home make him feel special? It will be a tragedy that the children must go to another situation and go to other friends and they must go and seek information and validation when they don't get it from home. Parents must be very very sensitive with regard to this affirm your children validate your children, maybe a creme sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said either rather be early dating Hi at

00:28:10--> 00:28:48

Allah when I read this hadith I feel that why we have not been able to understand this the BOK himself Salam said when Allah Tala wants goodness in a home when Allah Tala wants goodness in a home Allah Tala introduces kindness in that home. When you want to see many times we say we go to Allah make dua Allah Tala bring benefit in our house, maybe a trim so Salam has told you the way of bringing Allah Subhana Allah when Allah wants goodness in a home Allah Tala introduces kindness. When you see in a home, that the parents are speaking with kindness toward the children, the children are speaking with respect and kindness towards the parents. And there is a general

00:28:48--> 00:28:56

atmosphere of kindness, know that Allah subhanho wa Taala has blessed at home. And when you see the you know, in the home, the husband and wife are fighting,

00:28:58--> 00:29:01

all the time they are fighting and all the time they are, you know,

00:29:02--> 00:29:36

scoring points over one another. It's a sign that Allah subhanaw taala has taken away his his baraka from that house. So be it be aware of these type of things. When parents fight it has an impact upon children, they find it very difficult. So created a situation I'm not saying there must not be discipline, you know, there has to be discipline. It is frightening for a child to grow up without limitation without some form of discipline without knowing that there is a certain certain circle beyond which I cannot go

00:29:37--> 00:29:59

and someone has very beautifully put it in this way. They say to look after a growing child especially a teenage child, it is like a wet bar of soap. You know a wet bath soap is amazing. We take a wet bath so if you leave it loosely on your hand it will fall out and you will see that you will catch a wet bath so very very hard it also falls out. Now that is the type

00:30:00--> 00:30:32

off balance we are supposed to have with regards to the term piano have children not to solve, that they have a carte blanche to do whatever they want, or not so harsh upon them, that they become rebellious. Let us be very careful with your words with your children. You know, I read one day somewhere, someone said that, you know, when you for example, you children Break, break a glass, or break a tarp, or salsa. And then instinctively, many times

00:30:33--> 00:31:04

the parents will see Butterfingers butterfingers. Now you know what that does to the mind of a child. So the next time it's about to carry, and to catch a plate, or saucer, it instinctively becomes lack of confidence. And many times you see you you will find them doing it a couple of times. And you find what what is the reason? Well, you created that type of psychological fear in them.

00:31:05--> 00:31:19

Keep your children confidence, don't bring them up on the basis of inferiority complex. So when you create them in a sense of inferiority complex, it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

00:31:20--> 00:31:34

Give your children confidence, it has been proven that children who are confident, I'm not so talking of arrogance, children who grew up with confidence that they get from home, they are more likely

00:31:36--> 00:31:42

to be able to resist the pressure of the friends when telling them to do evil, because they got confidence from home.

00:31:44--> 00:32:28

And someone has very beautifully put it this way. He says that punishment suppresses behavior. Punishment suppresses behavior. That weird and good upbringing changes behavior. You think that punishment is going to change the behavior. Punishment only suppresses the behavior. So they won't do it in front of you for fear of punishment. They might do it elsewhere. But terabit giving them good advice that changes behavior. We want to change the behavior we don't want to suppress the behavior. Punishment will suppress it that we're speaking to them will change it. I read about I said Look, man, look man the wise Allah has made mentioned with regard to his advices we'll look at

00:32:28--> 00:33:13

our Dana manual hikma tarnish call Allah. Allah says Allah Tala granted he said look man Hickman and wisdom with color look manually I believe the abhi always call upon Liberty HE WILL WE ARE Israel Yagoona yella to Shri pillar in the shade colors. And recall the time when Luke Mondelez salat wa salam was advising his son Yamuna year Oh my son, don't associate partners to Almighty Allah Yagoona Yeah, oh my son do this activity Salat, performed salat wa all of it. Yeah, Bonilla, led to set your heart the cleaners don't look down upon people. What Adam Schiff said as the Mara don't walk on the earth with arrogance. So all of these advices so in one book, you know, it is written that look, man

00:33:13--> 00:33:49

and so that was salam. Some was given an inclined towards, you know, turning away and not being upon the right path. And Monalisa that was Trump's constant advisors brought him upon the right path. So speak to your children, advise your children have a communication with your children, not just to to punish them, it suppresses the bad behavior. We don't want to suppress it. We want to change, changing happens by therapy and speaking to them, giving them examples, giving them motivation, and making them part of your good deeds.

00:33:52--> 00:34:25

Make your children part of your good deeds. Where do we learn this from? The prime minister that was salam was told Allah subhanho wa Taala through the means of a dream which was a revelation from Almighty Allah subhanho wa Taala that he is slaughtering his son. And what did you do? You one day came up to his son here in the era of Illumina a near as your mother or my son I've seen a dream I'm slaughtering you. Tell me what is your opinion? Yeah, but if ALMA to honor all my father, do every as you have been commanded

00:34:26--> 00:35:00

a primary Salam be in the kuleana of Allah been one of the greatest in terms of submission to Allah. Ibrahim Alayhi Salatu. Salam could have just gotten started his son, son, because Allah Tala had commanded it, and he was prepared to do it. But what did you do? Oh, my son, I saw He saw in a dream. What is your opinion? So he made him part of the good deed. Brothers, we you and I must make our children part of good deeds, linked them to Allah subhanho wa taala. Give them the tools to be able to recognize Allah. Give them the tools to be able to recognize

00:35:00--> 00:35:22

To the benefit of being obedient to Allah and give them the tools to be able to realize the consequences of disobedience for Almighty Allah subhanho wa Taala sometimes you must do that, you know, try and bring them towards the likes and dislikes of Allah Tala, rather than our own likes and dislikes. Sometimes tell your children we are in a, you know, we are in the habit of sometimes telling our children

00:35:24--> 00:36:11

keep your room clean, keep your clothes clean, pick your clothes, I don't like untidiness, I don't like you being dirty. Instead of saying that sometimes just changed the words and said, Allah does not like and cleanliness. Allah likes cleanliness, in Allah, you know, your Allah loves cleanliness. So sometimes make it upon your children the likes of and the likes and dislikes. Often Allah doesn't like this. Allah likes this. Turn them towards Almighty Allah subhanho wa taala. So these are just few things that I'm making mention with regard to brothers, we are living in a world with a great amount of challenges. The thing that is going to help us is communication with our children, love

00:36:11--> 00:36:42

with our children, when I say that, even if children were to do something that is wrong, even if children were to must behave, or children have got a problem, the first port of call with regard to anything they do must be the parents, you must be able to have that communication if a child does something wrong. Instead of him going to his friends who might give him wrong advice, he must be able to come to the parents and said, Oh my god, oh my God, I've done something like this. The first port of call for the child in anything must be the parents.

00:36:44--> 00:36:56

And in today's time, with regard to all the fitness, we are changing, it's important, we can isolate our children from all the fitness is impossible to do. So you can insulate them, inoculate them,

00:36:57--> 00:37:21

you can isolate them, we think that they don't know if they know everything. You know, they used to say once upon a time, teach your children the effects of life. And when they talked about the facts of life, they meant a particular type of situation of male female relationship. So they should tell the children you know, tell the parents teach your children the facts of life. Nowadays, they say to teach the children the facts of life is like teaching a fish how to swim.

00:37:22--> 00:38:02

They know it before you well what you're going to teach them they'll teach you about it. So you can isolate them, you can inoculate them, tell them that these things happen. I remember Morata Cara Rahmatullah Lee and great scholar, You Allah, we haven't realized the worth of that person's Elam. You know, when you listen, even today, when you listen to him, just, you know, marvel at this great amount of knowledge that he has. So you said one day a very amazing thing. He was giving a, you know, workshop on Shiism. So he said, the shears will bring certain types of things, you know, objections. So when you first time you will hear it from them, it could have a great impact upon you

00:38:02--> 00:38:13

to cause pasta. Okay, this happened, I didn't know about it. And he said a very important thing. He said, the people the congregation must listen to, quote, unquote, the bad news from you.

00:38:15--> 00:38:20

Children must learn the challenges of the age from you.

00:38:21--> 00:38:49

He was able to learn to read from the curriculum, we all know what's happening in the curriculum. We all know what's happening in the curriculum today. Right? We all know that. So they must learn all the bad things and the challenges of the bad thing from the parents make it a point. And of course, you know, these are just giving you some tips with regard to it. It's important for us to realize that the real reason why making mention of it is because of the parents great responsibility. And I'm going to conclude

00:38:50--> 00:38:53

with an example which is deduced from

00:38:54--> 00:39:03

an ayat of the Holy Quran. And sometimes when I make mention of this example, I shudder but in reality that is the lesson of the ayat.

00:39:04--> 00:39:33

And when I make mention of this example and make mention of it from the very beginning, Oh Allah, never ever let this happen to anyone but this is an example which the Quran tells us you want to read Amanu or believer save yourself and your family members from the fire of Jana. So what Allah tell us who parents, save yourself and your children and your family from the fire of Jana. Now to give you

00:39:34--> 00:39:59

a manifestation an example of this, Alia May Allah forbid it ever happens. Someone comes home and he's driving home and he sees from the distance that there is a fire in his vicinity and law now normally we know this can't be anyone else. It can be us It must be a failed fire or something else really comes closer towards the home and is driving you city. This is quite close to my home and now all of a sudden he starts feeling worried. So

00:40:00--> 00:40:01

Can this be something that is

00:40:03--> 00:40:10

of danger to my child or to my children or to my family? And when it comes near? He says, Yes, his own house is burning.

00:40:11--> 00:40:29

His own house is burning. Now the worry is what happened to my wife? What happened to my children? Are they safe, he rushes into his home, the fire brigades are there, you can't go. He said, I'm the owner of the house, they allow him to go, he comes near the house, and he sees

00:40:30--> 00:40:52

his wife and his two children are saved there on the streets, he believes. And he says that humbling Allah has kept and then the third company is another child what happened to him? He was supposed to be out but easy peasy out boys in the house. Right? And perhaps, and you see is that in the window of the house, the child is waving?

00:40:56--> 00:40:57

What will a parent do with it?

00:40:58--> 00:41:04

What will he do? He put all caution aside, he will rush to and save his child.

00:41:06--> 00:41:10

I'm just giving an example when there's because this this is what the meaning of the IEP is.

00:41:11--> 00:41:23

More than this example, more than this example. Allah Tala says, save your children from that fire, which is far more greater than this fire.

00:41:24--> 00:42:06

Save your children from that fire, who unphysical wily coonara. Now find the ways and means don't take it lightly See to it that will give your children that therapy at the upbringing, that inshallah they will become not only in Jannah, they will become our provisions for us in Jannah as an imam did everything, so you'll be seated until Allah makes mentioned on the day of karma, a person will be standing on the scale of his good deeds. And all of a sudden you will see great amount of good deeds coming on the scale of his good deeds. And he will say yeah, I can do so many good deeds, where did his good deeds come from? And you will be given the answer that you left

00:42:06--> 00:42:51

behind pious children. They made dua for him or even if they may didn't make dua, they just loved a right yes life because they love the right yes life. You have got now the rewards that is coming on the scale of your good deeds. You will have on all believers, save yourself and your family members from the fire of Jana. We make dua that Allah subhanho wa Taala make us ideal parents, parents that will be motivation and inspiration for our children. We will save our children from all wrong things. We will do our utmost and we will make dua don't underestimate dua, maybe a Kareem Salah when he was Solomon said three peoples do us and not rejected Allah. One of them is a parent's dua

00:42:51--> 00:43:22

for the child. Imam Bukhari Rahmatullah. Lee became blind. Mambo sorry Rahmatullah Lee became blind. The mother used to make a lot of dua, oh Allah restore the the sight of my child, restore the sight of my child, restore him, and one day she saw a primary salatu salam in a dream. You Bramalea salat wa salam gave a great tidings that your child's eyesight has been restored. The next morning she got up the sun Imam Buhari RAM Tuileries, I said was restored by the dua of the mother. So Anna and Mr. Buhari became a member hurry that up till today.

00:43:24--> 00:43:33

We are up till today. A person becomes an alum after he completes Buhari, a sacrilege to be bothered to tabula, the most authentic book after the Kitab of Allah.

00:43:34--> 00:43:44

How it happened because of the dua of the mother. So we as parents have a great responsibility. The community also have a great responsibility. May Allah make us fulfill that responsibility while through our

00:43:45--> 00:44:04

argument? Hello, Monica handle karma Marini Jelani when he was in Minnesota Nick Allama said he was selling a very classy dinner went to Vienna Marina Muhammad you were very cool Salam Alaikum allotment of Santa Monica Santa Clara banality originally when you crop along Robina Havilland animals wodgina Whatever we put in our Kurata aisle

00:44:06--> 00:44:17

along with a detent in the mud. Well I'm Natalie manhwa so now your monthly demand would continue. Hello my nah now all the weaker when I want to become an arena in one karate Rafa when I'm on

00:44:20--> 00:44:20

camera.

00:44:21--> 00:44:59

Yeah, I wouldn't know when after an artery era to a firewall Misaki Yasha will you mercy and fee was upon us. It is a very a receiving no mercy and forgiveness. That is the barrier of our sins, remove our sins, remove ourselves by your forgiveness that Allah we are not happy with regard to the wrongs that we have done. We are ashamed of it. Your beloved Have you ever said we ever feel as regret over the wrong that he has done? And he approaches you than you were in sha Allah Allah, you will treat us with forgiveness and you will forgive our sins. Allah forgive our sins not because we are worth it because you love forgiving us in the car phone Kareem we will offer five one Allah Karim Allah

00:45:00--> 00:45:39

Hola Moffat Africa Oh Salman Amina hola yo Margaret in your mouth and your mercy far supersedes our grandson's the ALLAH forgive our sins because of your abundant mercy Allah keep us steadfast upon Islam keep us away from prohibition. Allah keeper steadfast upon Eman, the Allah keep us and our children's set for supporting man and yalla when we all leave this world that has never the columella in the law, Muhammad Rasool Allah you have blessed us with human you Allah generous person when you give someone something Allah does not take it away from him. He'll feel that it is against generosity to take it away. He Allah you are most generous. You are far more generous than any human

00:45:39--> 00:46:14

being you know when you have given us the money or not, do not take it away from us and keep us steadfast upon the demand. Yeah, let us give proper tribute to our children. Yeah, Allah, Allah protect our children young. From all the trials of the age, that nowadays so many trials Yeah, Allah, Allah, your Sahaba lived in a time. When they came up with the home they saw Your Beloved Habib, they saw what he coming down, they saw angels younger, and our children what do they see when they come on to the homes? You Allah they only see systems of disobedience? No, no they see Ghanaian sins in every corner you Allah, there is temptation, they have been invited to Watson's and now you

00:46:14--> 00:46:54

have mercy upon our children. We have mercy upon our society, Allah, Allah you protect them. Allah we as parents, we try Allah as a community we try Allah we set up madrasas, we give therapy, and we give you Allah Islamic education, but we cannot police our children 24 hours a day, You Allah, you take care of them in their life ever. They were to take a path towards Rome younger than that, catch them by the four locks and pick them upon pillar do not let them go towards the path of evil you know, you protect them. You bring them upon the right path, you know, you keep them steadfast, and we will do our best to Allah and we asked who you Allah, if you keep them steadfast, if you keep

00:46:54--> 00:47:24

them upon the right path to Allah, and you Allah, they let them become the fullness of our eyes in this world and let them become provisions for us in the after. And above all, you know we asked of you that you remain our guide and our protector in every step of our life called Allah Huhtala fish and Habibie in Allah wa Mala eco saloon Allah Nebby Yeah, you are the nominal salary was suddenly motor slimmer, along with somebody was selling America saving on the Vietnam War. But you were very conservative. So Hannah, Ramona Robin is that Yama is what was said when Serena