Rights And Obligations Of A Husband

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Bilal Dannoun

Channel: Bilal Dannoun

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not been alameen wa Salatu was Salam on attend many millennia lm and de la hora met and in Al Ameen Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barik ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi h nine brothers and sisters in Islam. Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

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inshallah, with Allah Today's presentation is entitled The rights and the obligations of the husbands in a previous lecture, we spoke about the rights of a wife and the rights of women in Islam. Today we're going to look at the rights and the obligations of the husbands. Now, I'd like to go back to a verse from sort of the room which is the 30th chapter of the Quran verse 21, Allah azza wa jal talks about the Institute of marriage. And in this verse, Allah subhanho wa Taala says, Why mean? Tea and holla cola comin and fusi calm as well, with a spoon Ooh, la la la Vina como de San Juan.

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And from amongst his signs is that he created for you spouses for you from your own kind, so that you may live in tranquility with them. And he meaning allies origin has put between you there is between the husband and wife, two things, my wife and

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my wife, and rough my love and mercy. So one of the main objectives in entering into the insert Institute of marriage is to find Sakina tranquility. Be careful that you don't say Sakina you know what Sakina is? Sakina means knife. Hmm. So we don't want knives inshallah. Sakina Sakina. The Arabic language is a very sensitive language brothers and sisters in Islam. So, Sakina want to find tranquility. Now what now what are the words for today's love, but we have another word in Arabic, for for love, and it is Eliza, whether you use my word and my word that means a deeper love. So they should be not just

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muhabba but my word that which is a deeper, a deeper love. with Jonathan Akuma data, Rama, Rama means mercy. This is very important that a successful relationship is built upon these two foundations that there needs to be more love and there needs to be mercy and compassion throughout the marital relationship

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and inshallah with the presence of these two ingredients, relationships will inshallah to Allah be sustained. So don't be like those people. This couple they they heard this verse where Jana Vina Kumar and Rama and Allah has placed between your mother and Russia so when they Allah bless them with two daughters, and they named one of them my weather and the other one they named her.

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Okay, this isn't the objective. The objective is for us to Yanni implement my weather and rathna within within our relationships in Sharla hooked Island. Now, marriage of course is a cooperation. It's a cooperation between a man and a woman, husband and wife. And the objective is to create Sakina to create this tranquility and we're lucky if you're not able to find tranquility in your home. Where are you going to find tranquility in this Sakina

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yonni you place your home should be a place of tranquility. Allah subhanho wa Taala he says while Allahu Jilin john aliquam Allah who died I mean beauty comes second that Allah subhanaw taala created for you this Sakina in your homes. Well love with Jana local min boutique one second. So the Sakina is found in the home. And that's why there's an Arabic proverb that says it's better to have 100 enemies outside of your home than to have one enemy inside of your home.

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Because that one enemy inside of your home is going to perturb your home and it's going to just perturb your whole life and make you any unbalanced. So we need to have make sure that our homes are built upon my wife and Robin and that we have Islamic homes and not just Muslim homes. Okay, and Islamic home is one whereby you know whereby the teachings of the Quran and the Sunnah are constantly being

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young echoed throughout the echo throughout the home that's what we want inshallah with the island. A Muslim home is one whereby you have you know, a democracy upon the on this on

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The wall and cola had an another frame and the word Allah and another frame and the word haematoxylin. Another frame hanging on the walls, and you have Jani core and on your bookshelf, but there's no prayer in the home. There's no fear of Allah azza wa jal they just a typical Muslim home. You don't want this one Islamic homes, that they may have these things but they actually implementing, implementing the teachings of the Quran and the Sunnah, and those things that are written inshallah hota Island. So, it's very important for spouses to remember a husband and wife, that part of the success of a relationship is to learn about their duties, to learn about their

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obligations, allies, our gel is our Creator. allies, our gel has wired us has engineered us, Allah azza wa jal, he knows what is best for us. He created us. So he sent us manuals.

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He sent us manuals, he sent us to her and he sent us the Sunnah. So we can learn how to go about our lives in a productive way in the successful way, and how to please Him and how to be happier. So if we want to be happier individuals, we need to be Muslims. What does Muslim mean? A Muslim is one who submits and surrenders and obeys Allah as his origin is to slam submission to Allah azza wa jal is at teaching teachings. So let us in sha Allah tala D, true Muslims, and by being true Muslims inshallah, to Allah, we will have outstanding, outstanding relationships and outstanding homes in Charlevoix, Thailand. So we have to learn about our rights, the rights that we have, in howqua,

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zones, the rights of the husband, Haku soldier,

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the rights or fukuzawa, the the rights of the wife, and

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Erica, there are combined rights, okay, need to learn about our rights. Just like if you go to work, if you go into a business, and you have a new job, you have a job description of what, and you have your contract and what you're entitled to, and, and what you have to do in this situation in that situation. So what we need to do before getting married even, is to learn about, learn about our rights and our obligations before we enter the marriage. Otherwise, we could end up crashing our relationships, you see many of us what we do, many couples, they enter the relationship. And they have no idea about their rights and obligations and haven't learned much about

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the mechanics or the logistics of of a marriage and how marriages can work in a very productive way. And they end up crushing them, it's like entering a car, and you haven't learned how to drive, you have no idea. And you haven't had any sort of training or knowledge and you get behind the steering wheel and you go, I've seen this done before you just you know, get behind and you just start doing this, and you put your foot on this thing called an accelerator. And if you have to slow down, you just hit this thing. Well, believe me, if you enter the car, you're almost guaranteed you're going to crash your car. Okay, so you learn, you go through the training, you know, in some parts of the

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world, especially in the

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South Asia, places like Singapore, for example. You cannot get married, you cannot get married without learning about marriage, about your rights, about your obligations, about some of the things that come with marriage. So you actually have to take a course maybe a crash course. Okay, before the man performs, you're awkward or you only care or you Kabuki tab. Okay, you actually have to take a course. Or else you cannot get your work done. I think it's a beautiful ID a very great idea, I think you should it should be implemented in

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should be implemented throughout the world, I would say especially in the Western world, whereby, you know, lots of our youth are not growing up in these Islamic environments. So that, you know, they just have very minimal knowledge. So this is something that maybe as parents, maybe As parents, we should be young, let's say we don't have these counseling sessions. And maybe at the very least, let us direct our children towards the resources, whether it's books, whether it's websites, whether it's courses, about marriage, so that they can enter the marriage, okay, and have a very productive marriage in shuttled the whole time. So, this is something to think about inshallah. So,

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today, inshallah Tada. We want to remind, remind our brothers and sisters about the

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rights of the husbands, the rights of the husband.

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Especially in a day and age brothers and sisters in Islam where divorce is divorce rates are phenomenally high.

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Yani as time is passing by divorce statistics are becoming higher and higher. Like one person was telling me the other day, they were saying to me soon, it's not going to be a shock that whether a person is divorced or not, the word divorce will become No longer will become a rude word or, or a word that is shock, horror. But what what we'll end up what in that will probably end up happening is, well, so what number divorce? are you up to?

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You know, it's really becoming like that. It's becoming like, you know, What number are you up to? And

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it is a very sad, you know,

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you know, so so Pamela, I think, you know, really, I think we need to tap in to also our older generation, how their marriages, and how their relationships lasted so long. And what were those secrets to the longevity of their marriages? You know, I come across many things of how alone when it comes to these relationships. You know, one saying I came across recently about a couple who were with each other for 65 years. And they said, they said, basically saying that, you know, in the past, if there was a problem in the past, if there was a problem in the relationship, that they would fix the problem, they would work on fixing it and being patient and working with the problem,

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that today. Today, today, it's not about fixing the problem, that it's about replacing the problem, let's just replace it. If it's, if it's broken, we'll just replace it. We won't, we won't try and fix it. That's the mentality has changed. You know, I really one of the most one of a very beautiful picture that I came across on the internet is a picture of an elderly couple, for a beautiful picture. An elderly couple, and the husband is feeding his wife. And she's in a nursing home with Alzheimer's, you know, she can't remember for the past five years, for the past five years, he has been visiting her and feeding her and she does not recognize who he is. So to her this man, her

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husband, okay, has has been coming to feed her. So he was said to him, it was said to him, Look, you know, you come and you, you feed her, you know, every day and you come and see her, she doesn't recognize you what, why haven't you given up? He said to her, she may not recognize me, but I recognize her. How beautiful is that? I know who she is, you know, as Pamela I think, you know, we really need to tap into some of those secrets. And those beautiful ingredients that we find in our our parents and in our nanny forefathers and how their marriages lasted for so long inshallah to Allah. So I can go into and talk about divorce statistics in and around the world, but only so

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Pamela just to speak about Australia. In one report, I remember that I came across an Australian spend $3 billion a year getting married.

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And guess how much they spend on getting divorced 6 billion. They spent $6 billion a year on divorce related matters. So in shallow Thailand, that's one of the ways of divorce proofing your relationship with be by by learning about your role and your duty. Okay, and submitting to the teachings of Islam. And not saying okay, this is, you know, the 21st century and, you know, these teachings were back in the days and you know, they apply to useless the harbor and the likes of you know, and their likes, you know, we live in a different era. This is not the attitude of a Muslim. what's beautiful about the teachings of Islam is that they are applicable to every time and place

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until the day of judgment.

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Remember this. Islam is not something that's just applicable to one time one people one place. It's applicable to every time and place until we meet Allah azza wa jal. So, in shallow Tyler, we're talking about today the obligations of the wife towards her husband, the rights of the husband. Now

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let's begin with a Hadeeth

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Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in this hadith is found in a bin hedbanz collection of Hadith a bit hidden and others, whereby the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he has put forward an equation, an equation that guarantees every woman, Jen

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and this hadith is exclusively addressing our sisters in Islam

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yaku Wu sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is a solitary Morocco Hamza wasana mushara ha ha ha happy that Farrugia ha ha ha Sonic photo jaha Oppo Xhosa. Obi Lucha de la lucha holy Jenna time in a guava Shi T. If a woman praise her five prayers, and she fasts for a month, the month of Ramadan, and she maintains her chastity and her modesty

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and she's obedient towards her husband. What a thought. Thought means obedience, what a thought zoologia her obala her in when the ration her husband pleanala it will be sent to her on the Day of Judgment intergender through which ever of the gates you wish to enter through

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this hadith is exclusive to our sisters. And there is no reported Hadith in Hadith literature that specifically directs men to enter gender through whichever of the gauge they wish to enter through.

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Very beautiful Hadith. So this is something that every wife needs to remember. And that the good treatment of a wife towards her husband is one of the keys to gender of entering gender.

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And a woman came to the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam. And he said to her at that event, do you have a husband? She said that? Um, yes, I do. He said to her, gave her Auntie level. How are you towards him? Or how do you treat him? She said as much as I can. I do not deny him any request. So what did he say to us? aloha alayhi wa sallam. He said to her fun very aina Auntie Minh, who? For in America Jana Toki. One okay. He said, he said to check then what is your position with regard to him for Verily, He is your way to gender or your way to the hellfire.

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And this hadith is found in Muslim Imam Ahmed.

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So seeking the pleasure of your husband, mighty sister in Islam is one of the ways and one of the tickets to intervention.

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The Prophet salallahu alaihe was setting them in the Hadees Hadith which is found in Sinhala, Timothy.

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He said, a human rotten man that was owed to her and her all then

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the Hala tiljander any woman who dies and her husband is pleased with her will antigen another guaranteed to antigen

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the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he emphasized the importance of a woman have a wife being obedient towards her husband, so much so that he actually said he said no to urine I hadn't. And yes Julie I had in multiple merata and test Julie zoji her Minerva mehaffey, he is a he said if I was going to order any one to prostrate to somebody else, I would have ordered the wife to prostrate to the husband because of the rights that he has over her. And this hadith is fine and Timothy and others.

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This Hadith was actually the history behind this hadith. The prophet SAW Selim he said, why the bingeable why the bingeable he sent him to Yemen for Dawa when he went to Yemen This is a place where predominantly the people are the people of the book, the Christians. And he found that these people

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he saw them prostrating in a shaman and in in in Yemen, he saw them prostrating to priests and cardinals and bishops and popes. And he came to do the same thing to the prophet SAW Selim II thought Look, these people are doing frustration. So due to these

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to these type of, you know, clergy men

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So, all these type of people, he said, well the prophets I send him is what is it that I can make says that to him as a form of worship a form of respect to the process, Selim said then he said, If I was to make anyone frustrated anybody else would be who it would be the wife prostrating to the husband because of the rights that he has over. This Heidi Danny is a very, very serious, very serious Heidi. However, prostration belongs only to Eliza which sujood belongs to Allah azza wa jal

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and remember Tim emember Timothy, who collected this Hadith,

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he indicated that this statement is reported from 10 of the Sahaba.

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Not nothing to be any belittled or to be taken lightly.

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There is lots of support regarding this hadith.

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The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in the Hadith that is found in Sahih, Muslim.

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The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said

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dunya Mata Waheguru Mata dunya, Allah to sada. He said, This world is a place of joy and enjoyment. mahtab

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WaheGuru WaheGuru mucha omata dunya and the greatest joy in this world is a righteous wife. The greatest joy that you can have is a woman to be a righteous pious God fearing movie The one who sees allies as a witch and remember Allah azza wa jal and Allah azza wa jal is her priority. That is so beautiful that that is beauty that she adds to her God given beauty.

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That is so beautiful when you look at a person's athletic manners in their upright character, and their attitude, which is in accordance with the teachings of Islam.

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I want to share with you a story of one of these women who insha Allah who tylo we, NASA boo her, we have a positive opinion of her good opinion that she was one of these righteous women

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on a trip coming back from hedge with her husband's on a boat.

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They're coming back on a boat from Hajj.

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So you can just imagine the sin, the sins have been cleansed and purified. If the Hajj was number or if the Hajj was a faultless Hajj.

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And there's lots of screaming going on in the boat, what's happening, the boat is sinking, the boat is sinking.

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And so the husband is running, and he comes to one of these big boats with rooms and what have you. So he turns to he comes in, he sees his his wife in the room. And he says to quickly get out, get out, we have to get out we have to basically the ship is sinking.

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She says Look, I'm not gonna go well until I wear my hijab, I have to put on my hijab and then I woke up

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the both thinking of thinking of hijab in, you know, in a stem, there's necessity and not all right, and when is that all a life and death situation, you just basically do what you have to do to save yourself. No time to be thinking about your job.

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And so anyway, she system will lie, I'm not coming out, until I put all of my hijab on she goes because if I'm going to die, I want to meet allies. So we're just in a state of obedience.

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I want to meet Eliza Jen, in the state of thought of obedience. That's how I want to meet Allah azza wa jal look at the attitude.

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So she puts on her Islamic apparel, her hijab,

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and she takes off with her husband.

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And everybody realizes now it's pretty much the dude, the ship is sinking faster and faster. And everyone realizes that death is inevitable.

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And only if Allah wills otherwise, then there is a 99% chance they're going to go.

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So she clings to her husband.

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And she says to him, I asked you by Allah, Are you pleased with me? Are you happy with me?

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Because she knows that her husband is her ticket to Jen.

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And she asked him again and he starts to cry. He realizes this is the gravity of the situation.

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And he says to her, he says to her, I am pleased with you.

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I am pleased with you. I am pleased with you. And then she says a shadow in La ilaha illallah wa shadow Ana Mohammed Abu rasuluh. And she repeats these noble the declaration until she drowns and she

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dies and he lives to tell this story.

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So we asked Allah subhana wa ala to have mercy upon him and upon all of our sisters who are righteous and who are working hard to be very righteous.

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No, my dear sister in Islam, that there is no such thing as blind obedience. There's no such thing as blind obedience in Islam.

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The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said, Let our fighter let our female see it left in them a bar to film a roof.

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Oh, lair fighter.

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He said from Swaziland he said that there is no obedience. When it comes to disobey Allah.

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Obedience is towards what is right.

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Law Attorney masuku FEMA says

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there is no obedience to the created by disobeying the creator and your allies origin. This Hadith is Fantasyland AB there would.

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So obedience is determined by one's ability. Because Allah does not burden a person beyond his ability.

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Allah subhanaw taala says later you can live Allahu Neff son in law was Aha.

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We read the sutra Baqarah chapter two, verse 286, that Allah does not burden a soul except with that within its capacity.

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You have to go out of your way. If you can't handle it, you can't do it. You just say I can't do it, if you are genuine UCC.

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And we have an Arab proverb that says in them a barbell is the bar, that bar obedience is based on your ability and your capacity.

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Now, it's very important, as I said earlier, for a woman to be obedient towards her husband. And so panela this, we know this from over 1400 years ago, from the time of Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam in the pristine teachings of Quran was soon. But so Pamela through the passage of time, with academic research, and all the money that goes into research and academia to do with relationships.

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The experts, the gurus, have come up. And they're saying,

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and they've written books and research and analysis, they can see,

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you can read this for yourself. I'm going to give you some examples, that when the wife is obedient, dutiful and respectful towards her husband, that this actually leads to a healthier and a happier marriage. This is not now the words of Muslims. Now I'm talking about non Muslims.

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hamdulillah as Muslims we've already submitted to the teachings, and we know there's hikma behind it and wisdom. But we are taking you back to the non Muslim literature study research

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over periods of years.

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One example that I came across was a study by an author whose name is Laura Doyle.

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Laura Doyle wrote a book that is entitled The surrendered wife,

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the surrendered wife.

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And this book pretty much echoes the teachings of our beloved Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam 1400 years ago. So when you really get you go, yeah, I've seen this before. This is familiar, is a hadith that represents this etc.

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And so Pamela,

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one review of the book that I came across one review, one person wrote, I have read the entire book three times.

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And as a result of putting its principles into practice, I have found that my partner has become the dream man, that that I've always wanted, attentive, loving, and thoughtful, because the surrendered wife is the wife who is is who is obedient towards her husband.

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That's what both this book is promoting. But be obedient, be submissive to him. Now, it's not the word submissive may seem extreme.

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We're talking within realms and within any we're not saying blindly and things like that, being an easygoing wife. So problema in one study, I'm just recording right now. And one study that I came across, that the more easygoing a

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A woman is and a wife is,

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the more attractive she is to her husband.

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Husbands find a woman who is very easygoing, they find her very attractive.

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This is something to consider.

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And when it comes to relationships,

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I just wanted to share with you some quotes from this book.

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She said, so what does it mean to respect your partner? It means that you accept his choices big and small, even if you don't agree with them. It might be extreme to some people, I'm just quoting.

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You honor his choice of socks and stocks, food and friendships, art and attitudes. You listen to him, and have regard for his ideas, his suggestions, his family and his work.

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This is something that I came across, we don't have time to go through it. You want to purchase the book by all means. There are some other books that I came across another book is entitled me question mark, OBEY Him, question mark, the obedient wife and God's way of happiness and blessing in the home. This is written by an author Elizabeth Elizabeth. Right. Rice, Hanford.

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A person who read this book said,

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I was there once and used to think that submission was a dirty word.

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How do I wish I had learned these lessons earlier on in my marriage?

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How much grief I would have saved myself. God is gracious.

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Another book

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that I came across, liberated through submission is the title of this book, liberated through submission through ta

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by PB Wilson.

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A person who read this book said,

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See, I don't have time to read these books. I've skimmed through the books, I went through the reviews. Let's see what the people are saying who've read these books are saying about these books. Let's hear it from the horse's mouth from the horse's mouth those who are thinking these books are good, and then they're working.

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One person said this book was excellent. And I say that because so many of us don't understand the power of submitting to our authorities, whether we agree with them or not. And this book by PB Wilson explains just that.

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Let's move on.

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Part of the of a wife's obedience to her husband is to serve him to the best of her ability.

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Now, I want to add something I'm going to throw a spanner in the works as they say.

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There is a controversy around amongst the scholars of Islam about the wife and sir and her service in the family home. Is it obligatory upon a wife is it obligatory upon a wife to perform daily chores such as you know, preparing the food and doing the washing and the cleaning?

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Okay.

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Just to go through the differences of opinion.

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According to the Hanafi school of thought, if,

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if a woman refuses to serve her husband, she is not to be held responsible and she cannot be reprimanded.

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This is the opinion also of the man Malika chef Gary and Noah we rahima whom Allah who Jamia

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another body of opinion,

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is that it is obligatory for a woman to serve her husband.

00:33:54--> 00:34:03

And this is the opinion of a bin tanea his students pay him and shackle Alberni, rahima home Allahu taala

00:34:05--> 00:34:06

a third body of opinion.

00:34:07--> 00:34:20

Some say that the wife must serve the husband in accordance to what is customary. So you go back to the earth, you go back to the customs of your people, what is the customs of your people generally speaking, what does a wife do?

00:34:22--> 00:34:30

She does this she does that. It could be that the customs of the people is whereby if you are wealthy you have somebody come in basically

00:34:32--> 00:34:39

like a maid and that's what they call them all the servants of the house. You know, basically claims on does those things as chose.

00:34:41--> 00:34:49

And one of the evidences cited in the in the famous is the famous hadith of, of Fatima, in which basically,

00:34:50--> 00:34:57

the incident of Fatima which is commonly supported, which is which is used by both parties.

00:34:59--> 00:34:59

The incident of force

00:35:00--> 00:35:05

I'll just share with you the insert of the fourth image which is an earlier calahonda, which is found inside the body.

00:35:06--> 00:35:07

Basically,

00:35:09--> 00:35:11

the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

00:35:13--> 00:35:20

was present and Fatima came to him complaining about the bad effects of the stone hand mill on her hand.

00:35:23--> 00:35:28

And she didn't find him and she actually she didn't find if she came to see him she didn't find it.

00:35:29--> 00:35:32

And left a message with Alisha or the loved one her

00:35:33--> 00:35:40

asking him to give her a made from amongst the captives that had recently been that he had recently received.

00:35:42--> 00:35:48

So when I informed him of his daughter's need for the metadata of the Prophet Mohammed Cicilline married to it.

00:35:50--> 00:36:00

He went to her house. And he entered and he found her and ollie on the bed, sitting there, ready to fall asleep. So he sat between them.

00:36:01--> 00:36:31

And he said to her, would you like me to direct you to something better than what you've requested? Let me guide you to something better than what you've requested. You want to make, I'm going to give you something better. He said to her before you go to sleep, say sapan Allah 33 times, to Panama three times and say Alhamdulillah 33 times and say, Allahu Akbar 34 times. In total, it makes 100.

00:36:32--> 00:36:39

He said, Indeed, that is better for you than a servant, you have strength and you find yourself You don't need a servant.

00:36:41--> 00:36:43

And this hadith is useful because I can say a Muslim.

00:36:45--> 00:37:00

So she said that she did that. And she sits up unless she had no more complaints after that. No more complaints, she didn't find a need for her to have a mate. So this is something that I would like to share with all my sisters.

00:37:01--> 00:37:13

And all my brothers, that before you go to sleep, the sooner is to say 33 times. So Pamela, and then 111 34 times Allahu Akbar. And that will help you overcome

00:37:14--> 00:37:29

those arduous those challenging hardship, those hardships that you have throughout your life in Sha throughout your days. So let's get back to that opinion. So what are the evidences cited by those who say talk about the earth?

00:37:32--> 00:37:59

cited in the famous hadith of Fatima in which asked for a servant and the prophet SAW Selim directed her to specific words of remembrance to be added before sleeping, which will be more beneficial. The body of the opinion that states that it is not obligatory for the wife to serve her husband argue that this hadith is in their favor, because it shows that her service was done voluntarily and out of her goodwill.

00:38:01--> 00:38:31

Other party of opinion, state that no Heidi's no that had it a fault that Fatima goes to show that it is obligatory for a wife to serve her husband, because it is part of Alma roof, which is the customary goodness in which Allah subhanaw taala speaks about in the Quran. And the very fact that her hands are getting all you know, she's complaining on the bad effects that the the grinding is having on her hands is proof that she's doing and doing household chores.

00:38:33--> 00:38:54

In any case, what seems to be the strongest opinion and Allahu tyla alum as I said, it's a controversial issue is that it is Mr. hub, it is recommended for a woman for the wife to serve her husband, that is not obligatory, but that you do need to keep in mind the customs of a people

00:38:56--> 00:39:07

the oath because as one of the principles in Islam is a little more formal haccombe the oath the customs of the people is to be taken into account.

00:39:13--> 00:39:21

We have the other evidence that the Hadeeth when I struggle laquanda was asked a lot when she was asked,

00:39:22--> 00:39:37

how was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam at home case the case the Kenya Quran appeal sauce lm fe T. She said Can a akuna le, she said at the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. He used to be the only act

00:39:39--> 00:39:47

and he would partake in the chores in the service of his household. And when the time for pray came, he would go out to the print.

00:39:48--> 00:39:58

And another narration states that he would mend his clothes and milk the cattle. So the fact that he's doing those things is not obligatory upon one person in the family unit.

00:40:00--> 00:40:09

I love Tyler Island. It been Tamia Rahim Allah, Allah says, he goes back to the earth, the custom of women of her status.

00:40:10--> 00:40:41

So the first rights of the husband is what is obedience to the husband, obedience of the wife towards her husband. The second right is not to leave the house without the permission of the husband, a woman should not leave her husband's home without his permission. And this has given her general permission, you can go and come as you please. Or you can go Come as you please. But I don't want you going to this place or that place without my permission, you have to respect that.

00:40:42--> 00:40:47

That is his right. And that is your obligation towards him as a wife.

00:40:48--> 00:41:02

And this is one of the main rights of the husband over his wife, Allah subhanaw taala isn't or and we're currently Effie BeautyCon and stay in your homes, sort of chapter 33 verse 33,

00:41:03--> 00:41:13

the third write of the husband, the wife must not allow any person into the house that will bring about the displeasure of your husband.

00:41:14--> 00:41:36

And this is bad based on the Hagia that is found in Sahih Muslim, whereby the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said and your rights upon them is that they will do not allow anyone who you dislike to sit on your cushion to sit on your couch. In other words to enter your home. You have the right to say I don't want this person in my home.

00:41:37--> 00:41:39

Especially if a person feels some fitna.

00:41:41--> 00:41:42

The fourth, right,

00:41:43--> 00:41:51

and another one of the main rights of the husband. And as some scholars have said, it's one of the major rights is ensuring

00:41:53--> 00:41:57

the conjugal rights of the husband, marital intimacy,

00:41:58--> 00:41:59

marital intimacy,

00:42:01--> 00:42:10

a woman must not prevent her husband from having relations with her anytime during the day or night,

00:42:11--> 00:42:20

except in certain circumstances, such as performing an obligatory action, or if she's in her monthly period.

00:42:22--> 00:42:24

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said

00:42:26--> 00:42:33

in the Hadith that is found in Sahih Bukhari in Sahih, Muslim and other books of Hadith.

00:42:34--> 00:42:37

He said either there are Raja Raja who

00:42:38--> 00:42:42

lfu Rashi. Enough urushi for that.

00:42:43--> 00:42:50

For betta hot burner, Allah Allah Allah, Allah eager to hotter, Bihar, O Yoruba and

00:42:52--> 00:43:01

the prophet SAW Selim said, If a man invites his wife today, and she refuses to come, and he sleeps in a state of anger.

00:43:02--> 00:43:16

The angels cursed her to the morning, or until he is pleased with her. These are not my words. These are the words of Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam who does not speak of his own whim or his own desire.

00:43:19--> 00:43:34

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, in the Hadith that is found and collected by Al Bazar, when a man invites his wife to his bed, she should respond to him, even if she was sitting on a camel saddle.

00:43:36--> 00:43:57

And yet, in another Hadith, that is found in soon and unnecessary. The prophet SAW Selim said, even even if she was working at the oven, he even if it's going to cause her inconvenience, and she is busy, and the husband wants to be intimate with her, she should not reject you.

00:43:59--> 00:44:20

And this has implications. This has ramifications. And this could lead to many Danny, of course, husbands will be considered. But if a husband has insisted to that level, then there must be something and it's here the prophet SAW Selim is indicating the seriousness of the matter

00:44:22--> 00:44:23

through these different habits.

00:44:25--> 00:44:30

And that's not to say also, that

00:44:31--> 00:44:41

we women don't have this desire. But in the case of women, women are able to suppress and control this more so than the men.

00:44:42--> 00:44:54

The way Allah Zola has created a men, it's not about here. We have to understand that as Allah subhanaw taala says, while I said that Kuru can answer, the male is not like the female. We are different.

00:44:55--> 00:44:59

Don't ever compare the way your husband is doing something or going on about

00:45:00--> 00:45:16

Something with you as a female and vice versa. We are different, who's better or worse, we are different in the way we, whether we it's differences biologically, psychologically, physiologically, neurologically, the way we perceive the way we need the way we appreciate whatever it is.

00:45:17--> 00:45:20

And this is something that we have to come to terms with.

00:45:23--> 00:45:31

Also, what's interesting is that it's not it is not allowed for a woman to observe a voluntary fast without the husband's consent.

00:45:33--> 00:45:44

A woman if she wants to fast forward, let's say she wants the first Monday and Thursday or 13th and 14th and 15th of every month or a day that's optional. Sooner fatawa

00:45:45--> 00:45:47

she needs to get his permission

00:45:48--> 00:45:52

unless he's given her a blanket permission Habibi.

00:45:53--> 00:45:54

Whatever he says.

00:45:56--> 00:45:57

You have a

00:45:59--> 00:46:03

you have a green card, whatever you want to call it green light.

00:46:04--> 00:46:12

You know, whenever you want to fast you can fast. If I don't want you to fast one day, I'll let you know in advance.

00:46:13--> 00:46:27

Okay. This is from the teachings of Islam. Based on the Hadith the prophet SAW Selim lair custom in Morocco, whether Allah Allah Allah has elaborated me, a woman may not fast while her husband is present, except for his permission to her Muslim.

00:46:29--> 00:46:35

The fifth write of the husband is safeguarding the husband's wealth and honor.

00:46:36--> 00:46:57

Allah says for soil your hair to fire the third one, Happy avartan Neela, ADB mahakala. So righteous women are devoted, obedient, guarding in the husband's absence will Allah commanded them to God? In other words, the husbands property and their own chastity, sort of Anissa chapter four, verse 34.

00:46:58--> 00:47:45

Number six, from amongst the rights of a husband is that the wife manages the house and the children's upbringing. When the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam in one beautiful Hadith he said, could look on Rhine wakulla Kama Sutra under it was roju rhinefield at athle, who were who were messed over and under it was those who was xojo. Prior to feed at value, how old yet well, I am a school at one and prior to him, and he said basically, the part the moral of this hadith is and the woman is a shepherd is in charge of her husband's house and children and she will be asked about them. She has a sense of responsibility, just like he is responsible for her.

00:47:47--> 00:48:13

He is responsible in maintaining her in spending on her and providing for her. In return. She has a sense of responsibility in the family's home. She is responsible and she is responsible for her children. So as parents, you are responsible for your children. What are they watching on television? What are they doing on the internet? Who are their friends? What are they reading?

00:48:14--> 00:48:23

What are they eating? Where is their? You know, are you following up you have a responsibility for as long as your children are under your care

00:48:24--> 00:48:36

kulu Kamara in wakulla como una unwra, Yeti, all of you are shepherds, and all of you are responsible for your flock.

00:48:38--> 00:49:06

I want to conclude now inshallah, who tyla after mentioning these six rights, major rights of the husband, and obligatory duties of the wife, some Hadees that a man will never wear him alone to Allah has included in this chapter because remember, we're going through the other side of him. And we're up to the chapter, which is Babel, aquazone almara, which is the husband's rights concerning his wife. He has a chapter

00:49:07--> 00:49:13

about this. I've mentioned most of the hadiths that he mentioned in my presentation so far.

00:49:14--> 00:49:18

Some of the one of the ideas that I haven't mentioned is

00:49:20--> 00:49:22

we've mentioned this hadith.

00:49:23--> 00:49:31

Yes, the hadith of more either been Javelin interesting, how do you say, Stan as soon as Timothy, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said,

00:49:33--> 00:49:40

whenever whenever a woman harms her husband in this world, that is without any Jew, right?

00:49:42--> 00:49:47

His wife among the food is any fool and the women of gender

00:49:49--> 00:49:58

the wide eyed virgins of gender, they say, you must not harm him. May Allah destroy you, they make against you.

00:50:00--> 00:50:06

He is only a passing guest with you and is about to leave you to come to us.

00:50:09--> 00:50:28

So this is a very serious Hadeeth that mmm no we also included in the Hadith talking about the rights of the husband. He never know he has another chapter. The next chapter is basically baboons. flokati, baboon, kakatiya, Allah, Allah.

00:50:33--> 00:50:38

So basically this Hadith, this chapter is about sustaining the members of the family.

00:50:40--> 00:50:43

And he mentioned some of the Act

00:50:44--> 00:51:03

whereby Eliza JAL commands husbands, we didn't say he has obligations towards the wife. And from amongst the obligations of the husband is that he spins on his wife and spins on his children. In Islam, a woman does not need to spend a single cent

00:51:04--> 00:51:31

on her family home, or on her husband on her children. She is not responsible at all to be working. She can pretty much say I'm going to stay at home, and you have to make sure you look after us, all of us in this family. And even though I've just inherited the millions of my parents, I don't have to spend a cent of that on us. It's for money.

00:51:32--> 00:51:34

That's what stem teaches us.

00:51:36--> 00:51:46

So if she wants to help, of course she can. And this would be from her goodwill and who could character and who niceness yes if the husband is not doing so well and he's not making ends meet.

00:51:47--> 00:52:25

So, Allah subhanho wa Taala he says the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother's food and clothing on a reasonable basis. Bill maroof ll Malou de la hora spoon Nova kieswetter roof that means on a reasonable basis can't a woman a wife cannot say look, you have to look after us. And I want you know, a Gucci bag and a you know, Burberry whatever and all these different brands that are out there and what else is there?

00:52:26--> 00:52:27

Allahu Allah.

00:52:28--> 00:52:39

know the names of all these brands that are out there now. Very expensive brands know Bill Maher off reasonable. What is reasonable inshallah.

00:52:41--> 00:53:32

And husbands need to remember the verse. I mean, the verse our district is from South Dakota chapter two, verse 233. But there's another chapter, verse 30, Chapter 34, verse 39, Allah subhanaw taala says one man and woman shaken for who, who, and wherever you spend in the cause of Allah He will replace it. So you have to always remember that Allah you out with Allah compensates when you do spend on your family. In the Hadith found in Sahih Muslim is the hadith of Abu huraira the Allahu Allahu Akbar, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he said, Dena rune and factor who feels severely left, why Dina rune and Dr. woofie Raka. Were the neroon Dr. de la miskeen. Why the neuron

00:53:32--> 00:53:40

unfucked and factor who Allah Allah, Allah Houma Allah, He said Obama who?

00:53:42--> 00:53:49

Obama Hi, john Obama, hi, john. He said, I lead the unfuck tahu ilanic.

00:53:50--> 00:53:54

He said a DNR notice a currency $1

00:53:55--> 00:53:59

I did not dinner. They you spend in a last way feasibility lab.

00:54:03--> 00:54:16

Or you spend to free a slave any amount of money that you spent a feasibility officer or to free a slave or as a charity you give to a needy person or to support your family.

00:54:18--> 00:54:32

The best one, the greatest of these spending the most virtuous and most rewarding to allies. I wonder which one is it? He said the one yielding the greatest reward is that what you spend on your family

00:54:37--> 00:54:40

so a Muslim is ordained to spend First of all,

00:54:42--> 00:54:47

okay, on the needs of his wife and children, they fold their food and clothing

00:54:50--> 00:54:53

and these expenses are obligatory upon him.

00:54:55--> 00:54:59

Now the other items that's optional. That can

00:55:00--> 00:55:00

From the noetherian

00:55:02--> 00:55:07

another Hadith mmm no we included is this hadith of us.

00:55:09--> 00:55:23

And here he mentions in the chapter of intention that the messenger of us are seldom said, wherever you spend seeking thereby the pleasure of Allah will have this reward even the muscle which you put in the mouth of your wife.

00:55:26--> 00:55:49

Even just one piece of food, a bite that you give to your wife, and you have the intention to be right rewarded for it. So when you do give to your wife, have the intention that you were doing it to please Allah. So have the intention that it's obligatory upon you as hesson have the intention that you are fulfilling as soon as you please the Allies origin that is has been

00:55:51--> 00:56:07

in the habit that is found in Bukhari and Muslim also the habit of almost rude al Badri Allahu anhu. He reported that the prophet SAW Selim, he said, either unfuck or rajulio, Allah Allah Hina forgotten the Cebu for he Allahu sadhaka.

00:56:09--> 00:56:16

He said, when someone spends on his family seeking his rewards for relief from Allah, it is counted as a charity for him.

00:56:18--> 00:56:19

Charity soda

00:56:20--> 00:56:42

and in the Hadith that is found in student AB there would Hades Abdullah, even American allows for the loved one humor, the Messenger of Allah Azza wa sallam, he said katha, katha Bill Maher Eastman and ubu mania quote. He said neglecting one's own dependence is a reason enough for a man to commit a sin.

00:56:44--> 00:56:47

neglecting your dependence your wife your children

00:56:48--> 00:57:08

in the Hadith, found in Bukhari and Muslim, the hadith of Abu hurayrah the Allahu anhu urba The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said two angels descend every morning and one says our la Allahu marfy monthly open holla

00:57:10--> 00:57:14

we are Kunal and her Allahumma RP mom, she can tell us,

00:57:15--> 00:57:16

our Allah

00:57:17--> 00:57:32

give him who spent something in place of what he spends, compensate him for his spending for your sake, and give the other one and give those and Oh Allah give destruction to the one who withholds from giving.

00:57:34--> 00:57:35

In the Hadith that is found

00:57:37--> 00:57:38

in Sahih Bukhari

00:57:41--> 00:58:04

Hadith, Abu hora de la one who seldom said the upper hand, the upper hand, which is Alia dhulia. Hi everyone, my name is su flare, the upper hand is better than the lower hand. When a lead is to flare, the upper hand is better than the lower hand. In other words, the spending hand is better than the receiving hand

00:58:05--> 00:58:24

and begin charity with those who are under your care. And the best charity is that which given out of surplus and he who asked Allah to help him, abstain from the unlawful and the forbidden, Allah will fulfill his wish and he who seeks seek self sufficiency, self sufficiency,

00:58:25--> 00:58:39

will be made self sufficient by Allah. And so my dear brothers and sisters in Islam, these are the words I wish to leave you with Allah subhanho wa Taala Allah knows best for sallallahu wasallam Mahabharata and anabaena Mohammed salamati como la he robotica