Married Ever After #01

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Ali Hammuda

Channel: Ali Hammuda

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Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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In Al Hamdulillah Hina Hemudu who want to stay no who want to stop futile who I don't mean to be here when I took karate

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but now the villa he died I mean surely unforeseen our Musa yeah Dr. Medina Miyagi healer who fella mobila who may you'd live further ahead the Allah

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wa shadow Allah Allah in Allahu wa definitely would actually gotta watch how do I know Mohammed Abdullah Hora pseudo

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any Muslim who is journeying to Allah subhanaw taala. And the home of the Hereafter

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needs three bits of luggage in order to make this journey possible.

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Without these three bits of furniture

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and equipment along the way, attaining that goal of pleasing Allah subhanaw taala and entering into Jannah becomes impossible. What are these three bits of luggage take note of them dear brothers and sisters, the first of them is to hate to hate to single out Allah subhanaw taala in worship, not to ascribe to him any partner explicitly or implicitly.

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The second bit of luggage required for every Muslim hoping to please Allah antigenic eventually is etbr

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conformity to the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam and the third bit of luggage that is indispensable in this journey for a Muslim is to Ischia, the purification of the soul.

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What is amazing Subhanallah he Naveen

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is that every one of these three bits of luggage can be found explicitly

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within the Islamic institution of marriage,

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you find within marriage Tauheed singling out Allah in worship, and you will find in marriage, it DEVAR conformity to the Sunnah and you find in marriage, the Teskey of the self, the purification of the soul. Let us elaborate on this for a moment. I want you brothers and sisters in this evening, in what will only be an introductory lesson to realize the enormity of the topic that we are discussing, and how it is not just a social one, something on the fringes of life that we discuss, but rather it influences your journey to Allah and the home of the Hereafter. We said the very first bit of luggage was

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tow hate how is this found in marriage.

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This Dear Brothers and Sisters, is in the fact that Allah subhanho wa Taala has not taken for himself a wife.

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Allah Almighty has not taken for himself a partner or a consultant. Therefore, no matter how independent man may claim to be, and how free from once he claims to be and how strong and how high he may climb up the ladder of success. There's always going to be a point in his life and in her life, when they say I cannot do this journey alone.

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For me to reach my completion as a human being and to have protection essential from the hair fire. I need another human being I need a spouse.

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So he may claim to be strong. He may claim to be fully qualified for the job he does. You may wear the finest of suits and he has a heck of a strap as well when he's walking and you look at his profile her profile on social media you think they look the part but in reality they will reach a dead end in their lives. They will realize that I cannot do this by myself I need I need marriage and this is part of the completion of man or woman when they are side by side as a married couple.

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As for Allah subhanho wa Taala

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he has not taken for himself a wife. He created the heavens and the earth and legislated Islam made halal, halal and haram haram and design paradise and created hell all by himself.

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And that is why our hate or

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hate is something that we see in marriage. Because it is a reminder of the Oneness of Allah the fact that we are we only function as a duel as a pair Allah subhanaw Medina said,

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Who will let the caller Coco mean MC Wahida he was the one who created you from one soul? Why'd ya lemon Huzzah. Jaha and from that one sold he made from it. It spouse its mate, Leah schooner Isla you have so that he may find rest in ha That is man

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and that is woman finding rest in another person and deficient when

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They aren't by themselves as for Allah Subhana Allah to Allah He said about himself or another who do Robina Mehta, Hadassah, Hebrew

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and he Allah exalted is his mighty he has not exalted his his mighty has not taken for himself a wife or a child, Allahu Akbar alone.

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And Allah subhanho wa Taala he said, but they are similar to you and He is the Originator of the heavens and the earth. And kulula who wanted How can he have a son

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while I'm talking level Sahiba when he did it take for himself, a wife wahala kakula che and He is the Creator of all things, that is Allah Jalla gelato

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and therefore he created the heavens and the earth he was alone.

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And before that, till eternity, he subhanho wa Taala was alone by himself.

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And when he brought down the Scripture and chose the messengers, he did this alone. And when angel is that our field shall blow in the hole eventually, he shall be alone, and when he shall resurrect this on the Day of Judgment, kingdom and sovereignty will belong to him alone. And that is why Allah subhanho wa Taala said in some profound verses or a Fiat Daraja Allah is the Owner of the high degrees.

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The Laroche, possessor of the throne util ro Hammond Omri. Here Allah may usher in a baggie he is sending revelation to whoever he wants from his slaves. Leo the royal Metalla in order to warn people of the day of meeting the Day of Judgment. Yo Mahan berries on the day when humanity shall be exposed. Larissa Allah Allah him in her home che nothing from them will be concealed from Allah, liminal Coolio who this kingdom belongs to on this day. Lila hint wa hidden kahar to Allah, the One the prevailing

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to Allah, the One the prevailing couldn't who Allahu Ahad say He is Allah the one.

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Therefore when you look into the face of your spouse, to your brother, the sister realize that in front of you is one of the greatest of Allah signs of tau hate the Oneness of Allah, he was always alone, and shall continue to be alone. And that is part of His Majesty on sovereignty. As for you and I, in order to reach our human completion and perfection, we need another person. Therefore, in this first bit of luggage Tawheed we see it in marriage.

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What was the second bit of luggage we said was required.

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It DEVAR conformity to the way of the messenger. So the licen as a rule, all of the doors that lead to paradise are shut

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with the exception to the door, that is the door of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam aII his sunnah,

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he passed away

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and he did not leave any bit of information that will help us draw closer to paradise or push us further away from hell except that he made it very clear

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the doors to Jana are shot only behind his guidance and upon His blessings, footsteps. Alayhi Salatu was Salam. And what is amazing is that this second bit of luggage, conformity to the Sunnah is found is found in the institution of Islamic of Islamic marriage between a man and a woman.

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And that is why Bukhari

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and Muslim the right on the authority of NSA that the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam caught wind of three men who came to his house and spoke to his wives and asked about the worship of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, what was his worship? They told these three men how the Prophet Muhammad Salah Salem worships Allah fekir and Nahum, Taka Lu ha. But it was as if these men belittled it.

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It seems that we are able to do more than that. So the prophets of Allah, Allah He was heard about this. And he said to these three men, and two more Latina Haltung cada waka, are you the three men who said such and such?

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Are you the three men who said such and such? What did they say? Well, one of them said, As for me, I fast and I will never break my first continual days of fasting. The second one, he said,

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I pray at night, and I will not sleep. And the third one, he said, I will be celibate. I will never marry I will never marry women. And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Where are you the ones who said this? He said Anna in the LA Keisha Camilla he were at kakula who Allah kidney assume over after what

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will suddenly what are called waters outward UniSA Thurman erotica and Sunnah de Felice m&e, he said, I am the one who fears Allah Almighty the most. And I have far more Taqwa consciousness of him than you.

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However, I pray and I sleep and I fast and they eat and they marry women. He said, so whoever turns away from my sunnah my way, then he's not from amongst us,

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Ya Allah and therefore, the act of worship of at bat conformity to the Sunnah, this is also found in marriage, what a remarkable institution it is lacking in the law. It is the way of the messengers before us as we shall find out. In fact, some of the companions, they wanted to castrate themselves.

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You know what that means, right? They wanted to damage themselves in certain parts of their body, to remove the desire for women, to free themselves up for jihad, and the worship of Allah subhanho wa Taala Prophet, so I said and forbade that.

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celibacy is not part of the religion.

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Imam Al Bukhari generates. That's it decided Musa EWB heard the companion side of Nabil workcast say that the companion was not doing the math alone, sought permission from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam to live a celibate life.

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I want to never go near women and I want to abstain from all sexual relations, to free up myself or bowing and prostrating and other duties. And the messengers I sell them forbade him from doing that. And then sadly, who cost the narrator of this narration he says, Why no as in Allahu Lakhta soin

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had permission been given to automatically mother home to live a celibate life we would have castrated ourselves.

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You could be we had the desire of the companions to free up their hearts for worship, and our and the work of Islam. But to take it to that level, no, this was forbidden. Marriage is from the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam we said the first bit of luggage to hate is found in marriage, it demand conformity It is found in marriage. What was the third bit of luggage

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this year meaning the purification of the soul. There can be no success brothers and sisters without it. Because Allah Subhana Allah Allah He said, Allah Menza CAHA successful is he who purifies his soul? Underline that Allah Almighty did not say Claudia Avila, Harmon Tala maca User Key enough so successful is he who learns how to purify himself. Success is not about attending a course on test gear, or reading a booklet or memorizing a hadith about it, or the Quran that speak of it. That's not success. Allah said success in is in being in a state of Ischia. We have to achieve it.

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And the La Jolla Giuliano who said Yo Mala Yun foul mouthed on wala balloon Day of Judgment, money and wealth will not benefit anyone in nah. Man at Allah has been selling him except he who presents Allah with a heart that is sound success is anchored upon Teskey ma Allah purify our hearts.

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And Allah Jalla Jalla Allah who said Jen to hygine to coluna her gardens of perpetual residents, they will live inside of it to God mean that the hell and heart beneath which rivers are flowing,

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what early catches a woman that has and this will be the reward of those who purify themselves. Teskey are the purification of the soul. And what is amazing is that we find this third bit of luggage in marriage as well. I don't think this needs any further elaboration or introduction. I think it is self evident and self explanatory how the purification of the soul is valid in marriage quite clearly how it protects a person with respect to his gaze and his private parts and her chastity and it fills that void in the heart that necessary gap in order to free yourself up for other obligations of life and to learn and to bow and prostrate.

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And that is why Bukhari and Muslim the right on the authority of Abdullah Hebrew must hold

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that the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Yeah, masha Allah Shabaab, ow young men,

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or young people, many strata I'm in qumola at affiliate so watch who whoever Have you has the ability to marry, he should get married. For inner who aka Abdullah Al basadi. We're also known in 4g because it will help a person lower their gaze and protect their private parts. What if I can't?

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He says, well, then let me stop. But whoever is unable to do that file

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At the Psalm he should fast that person should fast ie between brackets frequently,

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they should fast for in a whole level without because that fasting will act as a shield from Hara.

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Therefore three fundamentals, three bits of luggage, that are indispensable in my journey on your journey to Allah and the home of the Hereafter, and every one of them is found in the law in the institution of marriage. Moving on, why have we chosen your brothers and sisters this topic

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out of the many topics that could have been addressed?

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Sometimes, people when they see a leaflet or a poster or an advert on social media, speaking about marriage, they may belittle it, especially if this person is a so called someone quote unquote student of knowledge.

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Rally will occur that other animals HDMI or the modem on HDMI, that's a social topic. I want something about masala Hadith or pseudo fake something about language, something deep man, marriage, some people the ability, although in reality, this is a topic that affects the motor handling the educated and the GI hill the ignorant. It affects the young and the old. It affects the married and the unmarried. It affects the happily married,

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another was miserably married. It affects every single society or segment of society. It affects the individual, it affects the household, it affects the owner at large.

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And I spoke to a teacher of mine who deals with this on a day to day basis. I said to him, What would you say Shaco. Now is the

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the key problem that is affecting the OMA from progressing.

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And he said I truly believe after spending no less than 30 years in the Sharia Council. I truly believe it is down to marriage, marital issues in the Muslim world. It is that serious.

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Why should we not give this topic of marriage importance Dear brothers and sisters when after all marriage is now I'm going to share with you six headings

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to show you the importance of what we are discussing. Why should we not give marriage

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this type of importance and attention. When after all, marriage is the way of the prophets and messengers before us almost all of them.

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Allah gave them wives, and he gave them children. And we have an example in them to follow Allah subhanaw taala. He said,

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Well, according to Sula mill kundalika While you're under law, as well as Young was a Lea, we have sent many messengers before you O Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, and we gave them wives and children and offspring.

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Maybe with a few exceptions, like I said, I think he started to set up Jesus the son of Mary doesn't seem like he got married.

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Whether he will get married when he comes back towards the end of time where not Allah Almighty knows best. And with the exception perhaps of Yahia, alayhi salatu salam, Prophet John the Baptist Yaya

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the difference of opinion whether he got married or not based upon how Allah Almighty described him in the Quran as being Hustler, Hustler, what does that mean? Some have said based upon that description, he he never got married, and others they say, No, he certainly did get married. And Allah Almighty knows best but the general rule is what the general rule is that it was the way of the Prophets the messengers, dumb. Suleiman Ibrahim knew is hard, even the prophets that we hardly know anything about like she and others, Allah gave them wives and children.

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Why should we not give the topic of marriage the due importance and the due attention it deserves, when after all, it is an A garment, a type of clothing, figuratively speaking,

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that is indispensable in the life of a Muslim a garment. And that is because Allah Almighty describes marriage like that. He said, Hoonah Libero Sula, como anthem, universal law when you are a garment for them, they are a garment for you.

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I don't think a human being can bring about a more beautiful and comprehensive description of the nature of the relationship between man and woman in marriage, than what you just heard. garments are clothes for one another Subhanallah and I think and here you may ask yourself, how much would a Shiva what is the likeness between clothing and marriage? What is the similarity between marriage and garments?

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Any ideas.

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So, clothing, all may have said covers your IRA, it covers your private parts, the things that you don't want to usually show to the world.

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That's what garments they do. And marriage should have the exact same function. They are covering the faults of one another. They keep their issues at bay within the four walls of their home, they don't share it unnecessarily. They are covering the faults and blunders of one another because they see each other things that strangers don't see.

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And that is what a garment does. What else why was this analogy given? What is the purpose of a garment other than covering the private parts?

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It gives you not complete? Yeah, it's an element of completeness. Some people isn't going to be a bit of a belly going on. So they say we like to wear a dark colored clothes like black and dark brown because it doesn't show all the lumps and and bends and the gaps. Right? So we wear loose fitting clothing to make us look like we've been going to the gym and God help you if you see that person in the changing room, right? That's what garments they do. Right? And similarly the same purpose of marriage as well.

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It gives you a presentation. It gives you an aura. It gives you an ability to present yourself in public as a stable human being once and for all because you have settled down as we shall find out. What else do clothing do for a person?

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They

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they beautify a passion. Yeah. And marriage can also beautify a person's o'clock and beautify their Eman. What else does clove do? Does it not protect us from the cold of the winter and the heat of the summer? Right? And that's what marriage does. They are a protection for one another financial protection, physical protection, emotional protection, moral protection, Islamic protection, La ilaha illAllah. How then can it be that a person then complains of a spouse who is offering them a bruising fist every other day? Is this the type of clothing for each other that Allah Almighty has described marriage as being for ourselves? Undoubtedly not.

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What else do clothings do for us, we choose those garments that are most comfortable. No one wears a garment made out of fiberglass, or a garment made out of thorns, right.

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Similarly, you will choose a spouse that is most comforting for you. They provide comfort for one another. Therefore if you find yourself hating the end of the shift five or 5:30pm Because you've got to go back home, then you know that this marriage is not functioning as Allah Almighty wants it to function. Clothes give you comfort that marriage should give you absolute comfort as well. Another likeness Shebaa between garments and marriage is how garments wrap around your body.

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Look at the sleeve that I'm wearing here, the trousers that some of us are wearing, it wraps around your body, it's the closest thing you have to you, it makes contact with your body. It's around it. And that's that is how the couples should be. They should be close, there shouldn't be a gap a gap a gulf between them. And if there is a gap, it is temporal because of work or because of travel or because of LM or because of Salah in the masjid because of the need to visit a relative. But the new normal circumstance or the default situation is that they are enclosed with another with each other and there shouldn't be with them this type of gap.

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These are some of the two database points and Allah Almighty knows best. So this is the second point we said number one, marriage is the way of the people messengers before marriage is a garment the most important garment a believer could wear marriage is one of the clearest miracles of Allah Almighty in front of us, but it requires some thought.

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Marriage is a miracle brothers and sisters, and let's not limit to the idea of a miracle, or an eye or a sign to the obvious ones like the splitting of the moon

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or the splitting of the sea. The Prophet Musa as staff stick that changed into serpents snakes

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in marriage is a sign it really is a miracle. How come? How is it that a man and a woman who previously never knew each other and felt zero emotions towards each other

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and he may have bumped into her on numerous occasions in town, in the masjid or any other way and he never knew this person would become his wife, her husband,

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neutral and normal. And then all of a sudden after the marriage, this person becomes your second half and you share with them a relationship that cannot be compared to any type of relationship in existence.

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Who created that love?

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This is something that Allah has placed. And that is why the ISS were Jollibee. In

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my word that and he was the one who created that love and mercy between you. It is a gift from Allah. It is an extra terrestrial miracle. How come? How did it come about? They previously shared no conversation.

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They don't share blood, they don't have the same genes. Their DNA is different. They speak different languages, they prefer different foods. All of a sudden through the bond of marriage, lo and behold, a shake up the Ramona Sadie he says, there was a relationship between this between them that cannot be compared to any other relationship on planet Earth. And that is why Allah Almighty, He said in sort of a foregone, in the same sort of check I had read in his first Raka.

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Well, who will love the Hala communal Bashara, he was the one who created from water man Fauja, Allahu Allah subhanho wa Sahara. And then he made him a relative by means of lineage and marriage.

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He was the One who created man from water. And then he made him a relative through lineage and through and through marriage, what a sign and that is why the IEA is concluded with what can rabuka

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ca D RA and your node is ever powerful, your Lord is ever able, La ilaha illAllah.

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And if you want to see the size of this miracle,

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just look at what happens when they are separated from one another, the husband and the wife. If the marriage is functioning correctly, look at what happens to them when they are moved apart. Whether this is through death, or through travel for knowledge, or business, or any other endeavor, look what happens to them, shareholders to me will take me and he said that sometimes the pain that spouses go through when they are separated, for whatever reason is worse than death itself. And that's coming from a man by the way, who never got married. She called his Tamia, he didn't get married.

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And there was a study that was done by two psychiatrists in 1967, Thomas Holmes, and

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Richard Ray. And what they did was that they created a inventory a list of the most stressful experiences that a human being could go through, they did a survey of 5000 people. And they gave a weighting to 47 different difficulties that a person could go through.

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And the number one most stressful thing that a human being could go to could experience according to this survey was the death of a spouse. Now, it's strange because your parents were there before their spouse and your siblings were there before their spouse. So what your grandparents, then all of a sudden the stranger from a different country, maybe it seems that they come in the abrogate everything before them. We're not talking about here who is more important. We're talking about a reality there is a love that is a miracle from Allah. The marriage between man and woman is one of the truest miracles in front of us. But it requires thought,

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why should we not be given marriage giving marriage the attention it deserves when this is your heading number four, when it is one of the clearest paths for a human happiness in the life of this world.

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The messenger said Ali Hassan was salam as Muslim narrated on the authority of Abdullah hamlib. And as he said, A dunya Mata, life is an enjoyment the whole life is an enjoyment Metalla something that's passing a transient enjoyment that has to come to an end. But there is an enjoyment in it. He said, A dunya the whole life that you are experiencing is that type of enjoyment. And then he said war, how you will not die you ha and Maura to slavery, he said, but the best enjoyment that the life of this world could possibly offer is a righteous spouse in the law is a righteous spouse.

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There was a statement made by Ronald Reagan, who said

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that one of the happiest moments in the life of a man

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is when he goes home at the end of the day, making his way to a door knowing that on the other side of that door is a woman who is waiting for his footsteps NEMA from ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada and a happiness that is reciprocated from both.

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Why should we not give the topic of marriage due attention when it is and this is your heading number five, it is one of the greatest means for human rest so cool and tranquillity in the life in the life of this world.

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Here brothers and sisters, we want to pose an area that is usually

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We go to Iowa, in wedding ceremonies for a Friday Sermon where the topic of marriage is addressed, or a lecture or a series like this, that speaks about marriage. This is an idea that will almost always come up. What is the idea?

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warming it from Surah to Rome chapter of the Rome where Allah says Well, I mean it and from his many signs

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and Haleakala coming full circle as well is that he has created from yourselves spouse's Lita school la ha so that you may find dressed in her

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wa Jalla unicon Rana and he has placed between you both love and mercy. And then the idea concludes in Nephi Danika law yet in the economy, yet have occurred on indeed in this there are signs for people who think

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pause at this idea for a moment, brothers and sisters, I know you've heard it being recited so many times before, but don't make it tokenistic. Don't make it symbolic, think about the idea and more importantly, think about the context of this area.

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This idea has come in the middle

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of a group of ayat verses where Allah Almighty is drawing attention to humanity with respect to his many signs out there that indicate his existence and his power and knowledge.

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So you have a list of signs that Allah mentions in Surah two room one mean it and Calaca coming to Robin, from Ada and to mushroom 10 Tashi rule from the many signs of Allah is that he created you from dust. And then no one behold, you became human beings scattering on the land in the area after it is the one that you just heard. And then the idea after it I mean it Hulk was similar to a lot of the from His Signs is how he created the heavens and the earth. Work the laugh was unity come when he come and how your languages are different, and how your colors are different in the fidelity color. It didn't really mean there are signs in this for people have knowledge and then the eye

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after it will mean AR T Manam Combi Layli, when the HAR from His Signs is how you sleep during the night and during the day, when PT law will come in fugly and how you search for the bounty of Allah.

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And then the area after it will mean area t you recomand Baraka joven Wattana and from his many signs is how you see the Lightning

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Lightning from the signs of Allah the eye after it will mean it and Tacoma server or will be angry, and from His Signs is how the heavens and the earth are enduring, how they are being carried by his command. From the the Dow come down with a mean a lot of Allah will call you just once from the land,

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and then you will become you will become resurrected.

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What is amazing now ILA in Allah is that, in the middle of all of the signs of Allah, which include lightning, and the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the day of judgment, and how creation is enduring by His Command, and the differences in our colors and complexions and languages, and our creation as human beings. Amidst all of these massive signs, you have the topic of marriage that appears, and from his side is that he has created from yourselves spouse, so that you may find rest in her and he's made between you'd love it, to show you that this miracle, this sign of Allah subhanaw taala is no less insight to what you are seeing around you.

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But that's why the is concluded with what there is a sign in this for people who think it requires thought, because it's not as obvious as the sky and the earth, it's not as obvious as that it requires thought.

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Take a look at this idea.

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Bit by bit, let us break it down.

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When we mean it and from his science,

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what is an area

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an area does not mean a verse mile away a verse from the Quran and it literally means a sign is a sign to indicate something. That's what an AMA is.

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So here in this context, one of the signs that indicate that Allah exists

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and Allah is the most powerful, an ayah that indicates his knowledge. And if that indicates his mercy upon humanity, what is it Oh ALLAH and halacha coming in full sequence Elijah that he has created from yourselves meet spouses who is being addressed here.

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Who is being spoken about what is this is referring to he has created from yourselves

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spouses difference of opinion between the scholars. Some they say this area is actually referring to the Prophet Adam Ali. He's Salatu was Salam when Allah Almighty

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He fashioned him from clay and blue into him from his soul. Then Allah Almighty took from Adam, a rib. And from that rib from that read her work his wife she was created. So the ISS that he has created from yourself spouses from you, oh Adam from your rib, your wife she came about

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there is another opinion that says no, this idea means mean gene sequence meaning from your species

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that he has created from yourselves meaning from your species, meaning that your spouse is another human being.

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He has created from your race as a human being another spouse for you, oh man or woman.

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Your spouse was not decreed to be a dolphin or a frog, or a dog or Berlin wall or Eiffel Tower. And by the way, all of those examples you just heard, there have been documented cases of people who married them.

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Seriously.

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Allah says from His Signs is that he has created from yourselves meaning from your species,

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your spouse, so that you may find rest in later school in May, so that you may find in wrestling, meaning the fact that she has been created from you, oh, man, oh, Adam, or you have been created from one another or human beings. This is what helps you find rest in each other? Because had you been married to a tree or a dolphin or a frog or the Berlin wall or Eiffel Tower? You couldn't find this home?

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So from his mercy, He made the mate from the exact same species Letus Kulu. Either you have so that you may find Sakina sukoon tranquility in her. I want you to think about this word Sakina.

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Yes, Sakina it literally means

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something that is settled. Originally, it's in reference to something that has stopped moving and has settled and is calm, it is relaxed. Yes, we translate that now as Sakina tranquility.

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Which is the opposite of what it Rob. When something is moving and convulsing quite violently, we seem to have that more time. It is something that is moving violently. But if it stops, it settles we say second, it has settled. And that is why in the Arabic language, what do we call the house? We call it

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mess can mess can do you see it's the same three letters, the element of peace, because that's where things should settle down in the house. That's not the place where things should kick off.

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It's where things should stop moving, your heart relaxes.

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And that's why by the way, we call the knife in Arabic, what is it called? 1616. Again, it has the same link to Sakeena. Why because when you slaughter, let's say an animal insha Allah for after you call or something, we're trying to move away from the context of marriage here. When you slaughter an animal for

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an event or something like that, the animal stops moving, doesn't it? Second, that's just a linguistic usage that Sakina is what is found in the relationship, you will recreate it from the same species. So that we may find Sakina in her or we find Sakina in the species ie the spouse that Allah has created him or her.

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And look at the usage Subhanallah the word in Arabic is phenomenal. Lita school la ha so that you may find Sakina in her he did not say Lita school no and the HA so that you may find Sakina with her.

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He didn't say so that you may find Sakina with her.

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So that you may find Sakina with her, ie her. The preposition here or the particle of Isla is used. What's the difference between Isla and Linda?

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If you say a school No, I'm the fool and my Sakina or I reside sukoon I reside airing them with finance it means that's where my body is residing. That's where my body has rested in such and such city as school. Cardiff as school knowing that

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butetown as school knowing that California that's where my body is settling, I live there. But when you say a school Isla Cardiff you use inner now

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meaning my heart is residing there. It's not just my my body, my body might not be there, my heart is there. So Allah said Lita, school ELA ha so that you may find Sakina soon with her. That's where the heart rest and it stops moving. So you have this image of a person who's out and about dealing with the hustle and bustle of life and the ups and downs and the difficulty

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In the heart statements of dealing with people and their headaches and, and the rest of it, and then he comes home and his mind is moving, his heart is moving, everything is so turbulent. And then he comes, and then they meet each other and both of their hearts stop moving their hearts relax. And there is a sense of Sakina here

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from His Signs is that he has created from yourselves spouses

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so that you may find Sakina in her.

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Then Allah says what wa Jai levena Calm. Now what data were on and he has placed between you love and mercy. Allahu Akbar, who was the one who placed it, Allah Almighty, Nevada, love.

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Love, you can say is the name of the value that defines the relationship between people like siblings, brothers, sisters, cousins, friends, right? Love brings us together primarily.

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And then often that mercy is that relationship that defines usually the relationship between father and son, mother, daughter, parents, children, there's Ramadan there's mercy, isn't it? What then do you make of a relationship when love and mercy both have come hand in hand? Allahu Akbar.

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And who was the one who placed it? He said what Jehan Allah was the one who placed it there. If not, I showed in his the hydroton where he comments on this by saying what can I be jalila He for Hawaii, Axolotl.

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Whatever has been placed by Allah Himself, it will be the highest levels of perfection. Allahu Akbar, he was the one who placed the love and mercy sometimes you in this relationship and you look at the person in front of you. You see, How is this even possible? Surrender. Remember that it was Allah Almighty Who placed it there, you couldn't have done it. She couldn't have put it there. This was Allah Almighty. May Allah please love and Sakina and mercy in our relationships Allah on me. And then the I concludes with what in the fidelity color it they call me difficult indeed, in this there are signs for people who think it's not so obvious is this miracle. It's easy to take love mercy

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sukoon the marriage for granted.

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And that might it requires some thought. So the IS is there are signs in this but for who the people who exercise fought?

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How could we not give this topic of marriage attention brothers and sisters, we're going to conclude with this heading now.

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When Shavon has given this topic, so much attention. So the previous five points that you just heard, you can say somebody may argue they're quite idealistic. I mean, that's how a marriage should look.

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It sounds so nice, but my life doesn't really resonate with much of what you said.

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And here comes a heading number six as part of our introduction for this evening. Why should we not give marriage this type of attention when che pan has given this topic, so much more attention?

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Subhanallah it seems that shaytan has a vested interest in separating husband and wife.

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And it's one of those things that he celebrates a lot more with respect to sins, that to him, and his troops they achieve. And this was mentioned categorically in a hadith

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which Muslim the rights on the authority of Jabba that the messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in a believes that y'all da Rocha, who Allah Allah, it believes that devil shaytaan His name is bliss. Shaytan is a nickname. He places his throne on water imitating a stuffed aloha to the Throne of Allah subhanaw taala because Allah said Well, can I ask you who and unmarked Throne of Allah is upon water.

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So he believes he places his throne on water

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for my other athletes Saraya who then he sends out his troops

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from my huddle, and then one of them comes back later on in the evening.

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And he says to his master bliss, fan to cover our cover, I did such and such.

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Whether it is somebody who I may drink or somebody who I may gamble, somebody who I made funny came to Stockholm, Allah, and Shavon will say you didn't do anything not to be little dissents. But shaytan has a vision Allahu Akbar whereas our vision Kalani

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she finally has a vision he says, in the grand scheme of things haven't done much he may have in other words, he may have destroyed their past and taking him to help her to hell. I want more. Another may come to him and say I did this boasting his little minions most things to to IBLEES I did this. He said don't anything until one of them finally comes and says Morocco who had for rock turbina who Marathi. I did not leave a particular couple till I managed to separate between the

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cause them to divorce, then shaper will bring him closer Allama Shona generator set file Tassimo, who he hugs him, brings him close to his body and says nanana fat or Nana and you have done well, Allah, You have done well he says to him.

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Therefore, as a rule, when shaytan puts his money down a particular path, I know that he knows where he where to put his money.

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Because shaytaan and others who work for him from the INS from the human beings, they know very well that when you have destroyed a marriage, you have destroyed the family, you have destroyed the future of a society potentially as well. Look at the ramifications, dear brothers and sisters of marital discord,

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or worse still divorce when that marriage could have been saved, what happens? First of all, let us first acknowledge the fact that divorce is on the rise.

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And from the statistics, this course was born.

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Statistics are suggesting that in Saudi Arabia, and I mentioned that country for a reason.

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Statistics are suggesting that divorce is hovering around the 60%. Mark.

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There was also a report in 2014 to the Federal National Council,

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suggesting that divorce rates in the UAE are hovering around the 70% mark, seven out of 10 marriages are ending in failure. And a similar percentage is documented for Qatar.

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And a percentage not too far of this for Kuwait, the Muslims up in North America, they're also complaining of similar statistics saying that our divorce rates in the Muslim community are now reaching the standard divorce rate in the non Muslim American society. In the UK, for those of you who are aware and deal with this,

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it seems to be a very similar grim case, rather, in my own personal and short experience in the Islamic Council of Europe, who by the way, are supporting this sponsoring this lecture.

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Out of every 10 cases that are supposed to be mediating between people in every avenue of life, whether financial, marital, or whatever it may be out of every 10 or so cases, I would say maybe nine of them are are divorce related, maybe more. So we have a problem shaytaan is working, and many of these marriages could have been fixed. And this is our motto for these lecture series. We want to mend it rather than ending it we want to find solutions.

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And divorce undoubtedly is a window that Allah has provided if all other options fail. Why else has shaitan placed his money in this particular index investment? Look at what happens to the children.

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Ian Duncan Smith, who worked as the he was the ex Work and Pensions officer in the UK between 2010 and 2016. He said that children who emerge from broken homes are nine times more likely to commit crime than those children who come out from stable homes. That is a worrying statistic. Statistics are also saying that children nowadays are far more likely to have a smartphone at home than than a dad.

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And if the divorce rates other statistics, they say continue as they are at this moment in time in the UK.

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One in three children rather more than one in three children

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will be missing a mother or a father, they will not be living under a married household by the age of 50.

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We have an issue here brothers and sisters. This is part of the reason why Shaitan puts his money in this department. But then look at the individual cost that happens

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when a husband and wife are falling out.

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Look at what happens to him what hurt from an emotional psychological perspective. We've all been there, or at least a lot of us.

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Look at the element of Ishihara and how the heart is so occupied during that time.

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And how many hearts do we have? Mirjana Allah Julio Rajamouli, mill Cobain if you JioFi Allah has not given any human being two hearts in his torso in his chest. We have one heart and Allah said, Holy insanity. Hey, man was created week. So the heart is occupied, the mind is occupied. You try to pray but your heart is not there. You want to recite Quran your heart is not there. When you do you're the kid when you even take a vacation to get away from it all. Your heart is not there. You come to eat, you come to drink. It tastes like you're eating and drinking cardboard. Even food has lost the sweetness and flavor

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and wherever you go

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You smile with your friends, but they don't see the dark cloud that is hovering over your head. This is what it does brothers and sisters, and that is a heart that Allah has created for his remembrance and his Tawheed. And for you to learn and to teach Islam and to spread his religion and to bow and frustrate to create a project for the hereafter, the heart will not create it to be busied in this way. But let's be honest, marital discord does this to a person, brothers and sisters, and this is undoubtedly a reality.

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By the way, in the same study that we spoke about that was done by the two psychiatrists, Thomas Holmes and Richard ray in 1967, who said that there was a list of the most difficult experiences stressful experiences that a person could experience and we said number one was the death of a spouse number two and number three, why divorce and marital separation. The second and third most stressful experiences of a human being according to this study of 5000 people, and it's divorce number two, and marital separation.

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It requires that we address it therefore Dear brothers and sisters. In conclusion, the model for our lecture series from next week onwards, be delighted Allah will be a Quran based study, we want to retreat to the book of Allah subhanaw taala and find the solution there. How will we do it? We're going to take Ayat verses from the Quran or parts of ayat that deal with the topic of marriage explicitly or implicitly.

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And then we will give the Tafseer of the AI case studies pertaining to the AI practical applications of that area. And maybe sometimes even a non Muslim spin with respect to that is so that we can ensure that the Quran is the one that is remedying our problems because Allah Almighty said what are called eg now whom vikita have been for Sundar who and I, we have delivered to them a book that we have explained in detail and with knowledge, Allahu Akbar

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and Abdullah Hypno Ibis. He said, Lola, I mean knee I call over here in Abuja to houfy kitengela. If I lost the strap from my camel, I would find it in the book of Allah.

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If I lost the strap on my camel, I would find it in the book of Allah, ie he's so confident that the Quran has the solution to every problem that a person is experiencing. This is what we wish to be doing, dear brothers and sisters. As a disclaimer, however, I would like to say that this course is not looking to create a perfect relationship between husband and wife. Why? Because that doesn't exist in dunya. It exists in Jana, but not in dunya. How could it exist when problems existed even in the marriage of the Prophet Muhammad salallahu Alaihe Salam did he not need at one point to spend almost a month in the masjid about in the room next to the masjid?

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And is it not that Allina Vitaly once spent a night in the masjid when he fell out with Fatima, a woman who is in Jannah and Ali is in Ghana, by the way,

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from the Allahu Anhu.

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So we are not looking to deal with the minor issues, we are looking to manage the major issues.

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We want to understand brothers and sisters that the image of marriage that is painted to us by not just society, but by TV and social media is a fake one, that Bollywood or Hollywood image of hidden boy meeting girls and they live happily ever after. Doesn't exist in the life of this world. And the same way that we don't believe TV with respect to what they say about Islam and Quran and jihad. We should not believe TV about what they say, is the definition of an ideal marriage.

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We are looking to deal with those major issues the axioms the pillars of a marriage that are crumbling down in order to ensure that there is everlasting love and everlasting Sakina between the couple, and it is possible, and we're going to discover that it is not marriage that makes you happy. It is you that makes your marriage happy. It's a choice brothers and sisters, and being Muslim and married and very happy. These are not oxymoronic, these are not contradictory descriptions, it is possible to be all of them but it is based upon a choice that needs to be made and some effort and Allah Almighty has promised to fill the hands of such a person with goodness, if

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he or she wants to make those decisions.

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This is the introduction I wanted to share with you those seven headings with the conclusion describing the model we ask Allah Almighty to extend our lives so that we may complete this lecture series with a class sincerity and coupled with some alone and a view that Mohammed Mohammed