Adnan Rajeh – Seerah Halaqa Episode 6

Adnan Rajeh
AI: Summary © The speakers emphasize the importance of love and commitment to marriage, rather than just lust. They advise parents to focus on one's love for someone and not just on contributions to society. The importance of addressing past and future issues and finding the right rock for a project is emphasized. A woman talks about her desire to leave her husband's (Speaker 1) home and describes the feeling of being alone, while a brief advertisement for a movie is also mentioned.
AI: Transcript ©
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For us to kind of learn her story, very, very successful businesswoman. She had her own wealth she had not only that she had status within Quraysh it was very hard at the time for a woman to have that in Arabia to have status and to have the ability to, to state opinions and for people to listen to her love on her. She had married twice before him out of Utah to Islam, she had two children from previous marriages. Some newer agents, he had three so the Prophet Alia sauce and married her she had wasn't that this was her first time this is her third husband.

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And even though she was a few years older than him, this story, you know, their their love story, in my opinion, is one of the most beautiful love stories that you'll ever actually study or hear about or listen to, because not only did they can love each other throughout the 25 years of their marriage, but he loved her Alia salatu salam for

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close to 15 years after she died until he died on it used salatu salam. Now the story is that we have in the Sierra Leone are repetitive of how he would always make sure that anytime he was gifted something he sent something to her relatives or to her friends, that he stayed in touch with her family that he made the offer and spoke about her. I think she would point out that she's the only one that she was

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bothered by like the Prophet Ali's on his wife later on. We point out that I was always bothered by how much she would talk about her. And how much that came up. In his life. I thought it was said I mean, after she passed away, it would be two years before they would even dare talk to him about getting married. And once they did, once someone came up to me say Yasuda, you need to get married, you have teenagers at home and you have other at her children that her children stayed with him It has talked to us and we need you need to have someone at home to help you call or help either Khadija Tamina had and who's going to take her place, no one can take her place. Now the hola Juana

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and just

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you see the way, the way we're conditioned to understand love within within marriage, today is a little bit

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For sure, underwhelming. We don't seem to know the difference between lust and love and are two very, very different things.

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Lust is a it's chemical, it's biological, it's needed for sure, you can't really have a successful marriage. If none of it exists. If there's no chemistry at all, there's no if you look at the other person and you feel you do not feel attracted that person whatsoever, then it'll make it difficult for sure. I don't think no one is advised to enter a marriage with that type of setup to begin with. And that's not what we what we preach, for sure. But that is not by any means the gist of what marriage is about. And that is for sure. Not what will allow the marriage to have long activity, like the actual measurement of the success within a marriage is not by how attracted the two people

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were to each other at the beginning. That had nothing to do with that at all. Getting some of the most amazing love stories that people follow the end was ugly as divorces. The reason that they that this is the case is because when you watch when you grow up watching movies or TV, all love stories that they tell you end up at the altar. The end when two people are getting married? No, no, you want to talk to me about love. Show me 10 years into the marriage. Show me 15 years in how they feel about each other, what they say about one another, what their opinions are, how they speak to you show me then and then I'll tell you if this is real love, because love is not it's not that lust,

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that just is just like the Jumpstart, it's the cable just kind of starts it up. But love comes from, from years of caregiving, of caregiving of being a service of someone else, taking care of them, feeling responsible for them are putting their needs ahead of your own on both sides. By the way, I'm not saying that this is what the Woman No, no, both both parties do that they see the other one and they do what they can to serve them and take care of them. And that is what brings love Love Is it comes from good treatment. It comes from dealing with people in the highest of ethics and serving them and and supporting them standing by them through the for better or for worse during the easy

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times and during the difficult times. And that's what love is. That's why there's love amongst family members. That's why That's why we love our parents. And that's why we love it because they stand but they're there. They're always there people will turn their back on you in life time and time again. They're always there for you and that's what love is. That's what love is.

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It's the ability to do that. And if we do that for two people do that for each other then then yes, they'll they'll be in love for the majority of their all their lives. And the Prophet saw somebody talked about Khadija that's what he said.

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He will say no, she stood by me. When everyone turned their back on me. She believed in me when no one believed in me. She gave me her wealth when everyone deprived me of it. I had children with her we we built a family to

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together he would be, he would say these things he'd be very passionate about. And his thought was to them, I can't it's one of the parts of his character that I have yet to fully be able to imagine appropriately. Because it's not difficult to imagine the compassion he had on the other side of the strength. But that piece is a little bit, I don't know, maybe because all Middle Eastern men don't really know how to show that type of affection. But but when it comes to him, he just he was very vocal about it. He's just very open and just talked about it. You saw those of No, no, she she didn't, she did so much for me. But that takes also a certain type of character. It takes a certain

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type of character to be able to identify what others are doing for you, not what you're doing for them. That's, that's, that's why they got that's why they loved each other, by the way, because they were both like that. They're both very selfless people. They didn't focus on what they were doing for the other person, she didn't focus on what she was doing for him. He wasn't focusing on what he was doing for her. They all they both saw what the other person was doing for them. And that's why love grew. And that's the secret. That's the secret for a long term happy marriage is your focus on what the other person is doing for you. If you spend your life focusing on what you've done, I did,

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I have been spending my wealth and I have been taking care of it by the end of the book. And I did this and I did that, of course, you're going to you're filling your ego, you are blowing your vanity bubble, and it's getting bigger and bigger and you feel very grandiose, I have done all of this for you. And whereas, and then the other person is going to whatever they are you suggesting they didn't think that's what you're saying?

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Is that appropriate? Is that even is that even a proper way to think he never thought that we generally in his life, it has slotless setup. If you did something nice to him. Every time he saw you, he would remind you of it. Even after he paid you back. Even after he did something equivocally nice to you every time he ran into you can remind you remember the time you did that for me? You remember Oh, just like to like it. It was amazing to them until the point where so please stop talking about this. Stop bringing it up. I didn't know if this is the least I can do for you. And she was the same. That's what I'm trying to explain to you. Their marriage was not just he just

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married some woman. No, no, no, no, oh, no, he made Khadija Islam without Khadija wouldn't be the same and neither would Mohamed Salah and I'm humbled to live without Khadija would not be the same. This is this was a partnership and every aspect of what it was. And that piece has to be acknowledged. And and we'll talk about it more because I'm just saying it right now. But it'll be proven me will prove it when we when we go through the story. And you see what she actually does with the Aloha and how she responds, she behaves how she responds.

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It's those critical moments. But that's how she was she she gave she never she didn't. She didn't remind you of what she gave you. She focused on all the good that you're doing. And he did the same.

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So if I'm doing some good, my wife is doing some good. There are two ways to go by this, I remember the good that I'm doing. And remind her of it. She remembers the good that she's doing. She reminds me of it, we end up in a court

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trying to rip each other off using the children as weapons and or just just, let's do a little just as quick, a quick just turn the tables really quickly. All right, I focus on what she's doing for me, she focuses on what I'm doing for her.

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That's an endless love story.

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Honestly, forget about all the Shakespearean garbage they teach you. It's really, really not this is listen to me, this is what it is. When you get married, this is what it's about. Even if the person in front of you doesn't do it, you do it the old dog get in line, though, it'll take them maybe a decade, but it will come around. Just focus. Do it that way. Focus on what they're doing focus on their contribution. Even if you don't think just focus on it and be thankful and grateful for adults, they'll understand, they'll pick up on okay, that's how this is. And then they'll do it. And then every both parties are happy. And you will because when you use the negative, when has the

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negative ever worked in relations, it's never worked. It never does what you say I'm doing all this, you're not doing your piece, it doesn't make no motivate them to do better. It doesn't work. It never has. But the opposite does. When you make someone feel good about the about what they're offering about their contribution, they're more likely to contribute, they're more likely to do more because they feel like they've been appreciated for what they're what they're doing. So if you want the other person to do more, just just appreciate it more, acknowledge it and encourage it. It'll happen it'll happen. It'll happen very rarely does it not? Like I'm saying one less than 1% of human

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beings don't respond to this. You're not married to that person. Everyone thinks they're married to that one person in the world that does not appreciate them. Oh, you're not you know, the odds of you being married to someone who just who completely dismisses you who is built in a way where they psychologically are just by nature narcissistic and don't is very, very, very low. It does

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is a and honestly, if that was the case, it would be very, this is not how you're gonna find out.

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Just do what they did. Just turn the table around a little bit. When you get married, just learn, take it from me take it this is, if you're younger than me, this is your self talking to you 15 years from the future coming back saying just do that. Just don't, don't do the opposite. Don't get fixated on what you're doing, and how you're pushing, putting your focus on what they're doing. Appreciate that, acknowledge that and watch how things watch how love will grow. And watch, watch how people will, will just get better. And it's not that hard to maintain a marriage if you just think the way they thought sallallahu alayhi wasallam what they have said, I'm Robbie Allahu anha

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Khadija to cobra,

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I think today, it's important that we talk more about the importance of matrimony. And we map out paths for our younger

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counterparts of society to achieve it and get into it. I don't think it's happening naturally anymore, as used to as much as it used to. Most of us, most people here, your parents come from Middle Eastern, or, you know, the subcontinent backgrounds, or African backgrounds, or they come from backgrounds where marriage, it just happened just at a certain age, it just kind of happened, someone if you're a girl, so a couple of people knock on the door, and then you just get married. And as a young man, your dad will tell you across your I don't want you in my house anymore, I'm gonna get you married and get out. It would just happen. It would be normal, just a natural next

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step. And and everyone knew what their role was in the marriage. Everyone knew what to expect from the other part. So the other part didn't do well, was that what the norm dictated, then it would be clear that person is making a mistake, and they would be corrected by both family members by the community at large would correct their behavior. It wasn't very complicated. It wasn't complicated. Today, I can't say that it's that we're looking at the same landscape, I can't think it's actually much more difficult. I don't want to make this era Holika, you know, a marriage counseling session in a marriage prep session. But But I think it's something that requires our attention. If we don't

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want to run into real problems in the near future, or the or the far future, we are looking at more and more of our young of our youth, and of our younger brothers sisters walking into their 30s comfortably without marriage, hitting that middle, mid 30s Mark and still is still not married. And and I talked to the person like Yeah, I know I have time. I'm like, No, you don't. You have no time you have right you run out, you played half of it already. You know, you don't have time, you have a child, when you're as a man, you have a child when you're 35. By the time they're 20, or you're 55 years old. Right? That's, that's your old. You're an old dude, he's still young, you're an old dude.

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It doesn't work as well. If you have your child and you're 14, he's 20 or 60, you're checking out he's checking in, it doesn't work. It's two, these differences are really big. It makes it difficult for us, for parents to mentor, it makes it difficult for parents to be there for and to relate. Because the the generational gap, I'm not saying you shouldn't have children, you're older. And you're saying we have to talk about this, we have this has to be talked about. This has to be addressed because it's a visible difference in how we are running our society. And I feel like people are just taking it I know I'm noticing that the graphs are looking different. And we have to

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kind of address this early. I'm not saying that we start marrying people when they're in their teens. But let's talk about reasonable numbers. Let's talk about mid 20s That should be the limit for everyone. They should be looking to get married. Money should not be a problem. Money should not be a problem roles in the household shouldn't be a problem setting things up so they can financially be comfortable and also know what the rights and and obligations are. So they can have a long they can have a build a family they give it history together. That history piece is important. Even if the person with you, you don't get along on everything. But you guys if you're there for 1015 years,

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there's history there. This person knows you know this person, there's something there is something that connects you that no one else has that connection with you based on these things are meaningful.

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So let's think about these things a little bit more, and help our youth in Charlotte move forward with them so that we have more marriages similar to the one of Mohammed and Khadija so Allah Muhammad Rasul Allah is like, Ah, my God, it's beautiful, and it's meaningful. And it's just, it's just very uplifting. When when there was a no I, I've seen stuff similar from where I used to live in I came from Syria. You see men in their 80s, who'd like lost their wives who, who truly loved their wives, or truly, truly loved their wives who mourn their wives for a decade after they passed away. And vice versa.

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A woman in her 70s, who mourns a husband who died maybe maybe two or three days and my grandmother, she mourned my grandfather for decades for decades after he passed away. Because because they they built it on something much more solid and they knew what their roles were and they and they did send in marriages, they'd be offered DEXA and and that axon piece is just, it's very it's sparked. It creates love and love never dies if it's there, but just know the difference between lust and love. Okay, so that

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That's him getting married out of here. Salatu was Salam. He had six children with Khadija he lost two of them.

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He lost two children.

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He lost two male children at the time. At the time that was even socially more more pressure on him.

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He has his marriage survive the loss of two children under the age of four and the age of seven, Qasim and Abdullah

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and at points in his life, I lay aside those around he would be reminded that you don't you don't have a male child, which obviously is another beautiful part of the story that we actually inherited, his name was faulty, most of the Aloha and it is still I'm sure she is the one who whose name out his name went through alagille. So obviously, I'm in terms of his life.

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But this was the difficulty. And I think the fact that he lost two children actually, he lost three, but I'll just focus on two. To be more honest, he lost them all aside from Fatima, but they were older. But losing two children I saw 200 during that early stage of his life in his in his late 20s and early 30s. It just allows people to be able to relate a little bit more to him to see his you see his humanity his human part, Syed Ali, who saw some of someone just going through life and and suffering loss, suffering actual painful loss. There's nothing worse than a small coffin in this world. There's nothing worse than a small coffin. They are the worst things in the world. And this

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no matter what you say, no matter what you experienced, that, when you see that, you know that this is just it has to be Allah Who am I lucky, you see. So the Prophet Allah is also being someone who who'd experienced that was Khadija twice and still in there and only strengthen their relationship with something very, very interesting. To add to that piece of humanity. I'm gonna tell you another story. Tell you the story of Xenium and harissa, just so that you understand his true human side Alia salatu salam, there was a man by the name of Hakeem had been Hizam had been hoilett now her name Khadija was Khadija been toilet? So Khadija was his aunt,

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and he was some generations older than her. And that's normal. If you understand how older Arabic families work, the they get married early. So after a certain point, the mother is pregnant with the child and so is her daughter, and they just so you'll have you and your uncle are the same age or he's You're older than your uncle, and it's very normal where I came from. So Hakeem and his mom was a very, he was a rich, he was a rich gentleman. And at the time there were obviously slave markets still existed, and that was still a thing.

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And he wanted to give Khadija radula Juan has something is and he had been away for a while, and he came back and it's customary for Arabs, if you come back after a long time to get people gifts. If you if you're if your parents ever went back home during the 90s they would take with them like suitcase upon suitcase of just gifts, and then everyone would take them and no one would be happy and they'll talk about you behind your back that you're cheap and it never worked out. But this is how it happened because they always had to give gifts. So he came and he went and though the gift he wanted to give a DJ was a young boy that he had he had purchased from the slave market. His name was

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his name was Zaid.

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Now, Zaid was five or six years old, we're not sure something something around that age when his mother and her friends went out for a picnic somewhere in the northern part of Arabia. And they were raided by an army or a small group of,

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of Gattaca as they call them or any hooligans. And he was stolen away from his mother at that very young age, and sold as a slaved. And he was moved around from one house to the other. Until Hakeem and his, on his journey, he was doing his businesses in the north, which would purchase him by him and bring him back to Mecca. And he would give him as a

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as a gift to the Hadiya. Although I know Khadija would pass them on to the Prophet Allah usato, same as a gift from herself.

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And we're going to ask him ask you a question. And then I'm going to let you think about a little bit they'll come back to it. Now. Now the day that he was stolen from his family, and then bought by Hakeem, and then given to Khadija and then given to the Prophet.

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worst thing that ever happened to him

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or not. When you think about the story, if you're, if I told you the story, without maybe the context that's coming, what's the worst thing that happened to this child so far? Right? He's been stolen from his family and still in sold as a slave. So let's keep that thought for a moment as we go along. So David grew up in the profit area, sort of Sam's house.

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Seven, eight years into this, you'd grow up to be a young man, by the time you're 14 and 15. By then, you are old enough to carry your own family, open your family, open your own household, have your own business. So it was a young man now with the Prophet Alayhi Salatu was Salam.

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His father Hadith that had been

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Euro Hill was a poet who never stopped looking for aid. He never stopped looking for cheap. He would go far and could because he didn't know that he was the kid was stolen in one place. He has no idea which market this kid has gone to. He doesn't know in which direction he was. He was sold. So he he spent years just searching for his son seeing if someone's can recognize his description and where in which direction the people for years upon years, he would say amongst a boy but the key to Isla is Aiden while I'm editing my file, a hey, you and your Raja at Duna will adjourn.

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firelighter Sherri hill like a da o button. Hello la cabeza de ser Hello. Hola. Hola, que el Jebel FASB Mina duniya Raju, A Rocha Lee budget is like five or six feasible to this beautiful stuff. He's talking about I mourn my son, I don't know where he is alive or dead. Is he in a mountain? Is he in a valley? I don't know where he is. And this poetry would travel. And finally, someone would hear this poetry in Mecca. And he was here with Zaid and he would just hide that question mark. Is it is it the kindess with Mohammed bin Abdullah bin Abdul McCollum. So you would ask the kids something about his past and he would Zaid would remember a little bit of his childhood. And this gentleman

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would run into Zetas father a year later and say, I think I think that your son may be in Makkah, he may be in Machinae be there with one of the descendants of Abdullah McCollum. So his father came really, really obviously excited. He's like, with one of the descendants of Motala. But him do amazing because Abdul Muttalib was known to be an extremely generous figure, and he was very user, he was a gentleman. So knowing that my son is probably with someone who was reasonable someone I can go and I can, I can maybe find a way so he put all the money he could together. He went and he took money from all of his siblings, all of his relatives put as much money as possible. And he made his

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journey down to Mecca. And he asked who is the I have a son? His name is Zaid, and I think he's with one of the descendants of the McClellan. So they point in, pointed out that there's a man by the name Muhammad Abdullah, and he has any has a young boy, a young man now by the name of Zaid. So they they asked for a meeting with the Prophet Allah you saw to Assam so he comes out of your sight to Islam is born before Islam, obviously. And he asked them they tell him this and of course, how does the insurer ale was

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trying to argue his point that you can either you are a great heritage and your grandfather was a great man and we are people in pain and I bought all this money and the Prophet Allah is listening to this introduction. He tells them brother I could barely imagine he just told me what you want. What do you need? You don't have to? I don't need all this introduction. Just tell me what you want for calling the evening. Even ease aid and that my son's aid is with you. I want him back. For Canada do Nuka Allah ma Hua highroad mimma? How can I offer you a better I give you a better offer than what you're saying? He's saying, I'm coming. I have all this money. I'm bringing all these

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people to how about you keep your money? Here's what he told you keep your money. You don't need any of these people who are here as good as last year, I was coming in to intervene or intercede on your behalf. I brings aid.

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And I if he recognizes you, then he has the option to go with you or just stay with me. But I will not take him out.

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I will I can new hola hola. Beautiful, who I know if you're lucky. I will not kick him out of my home. Like I won't tell him you can't live with me anymore. That's all I'm asking. He comes he chooses whoever he wants. I have no problem. But I will not tell Jane that he is not welcome in my home. If he wants to stay with me. He stays with me. Is that fair? And the father said that's no that's not fair. That is beyond what I thought was even possible within your generosity. And he's praising the Prophet Allah you saw there was no problem.

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He goes he called his aid. It was a Do you know these two people with his father and uncle? Of course he knows them. Of course, and it's a union

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that is filled with tears and filled with you know, pain and sorrow and happiness that he's seen as his family again. And after that's done the Prophet Allah usados says he has it. in them. I had a book by the Amok fan Temuka Iran and taro dama alguma Oh, untap calm I Well, I'm really like, this is your father's your uncle, and it's called me up to you. You're welcome to leave with them. And you're welcome to stay with me. It's totally up to you for Karla for Miranda dizzied. He didn't miss a beat.

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He didn't blink. He didn't take a moment to think about it. callable up karma karma hate. I'm with you till about the end of my life.

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I am wishing to the end of my life. For Karla boo hoo ha Joon int. Have you lost your mind? Total and their booty yet either Abiko I'm MC. We're Omega Halleck. You're going to choose to stay as a servant in the house of some man that is foreign to you, Hoover overcoming with your father and your mother and your family to fall in Nicoletta, if you do

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don't know him. So Allahu alayhi salatu salam, you don't know who he is. You don't know. At 15 years old, you don't know him. I know him. I love you and I allow him to he never lost touch with his parent parents, by the way, he didn't. He always had. He was always in touch with his with his family. Is he saying there's a though the Allahu Anhu.

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But he said, No, I can. I'll never leave him. I'm with him. I will stay with him.

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So as far as an uncle says, like a dyadic, that's, that's up to you. So the point of it is I'm talking by his hand and they went and he walked over to the Kaaba, the Sanyo cabaret in front of the Kaaba Bucha and he held his hand up Bacala is a Ibni is smooth was Edelman and Mohammed yada yadi Suniva Rizzo, he is now named Zetas and Mohammed he is my son now I'm adopting him and they caught me and my son, I inherited him, he inherits me now Islamically, that is not acceptable, as you know. Now, the reason he said that, under his law to Islam is that he Islam was not yet I knew

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the thing he was not a prophet. So he went by the laws of Ibrahim, the laws of the earlier laws that Abdul Muttalib had revived was that if you adopted someone, they their lineage would become yours. Meaning you wouldn't it would never wouldn't be pointed out in the future, know that this person comes from a different background or a different heritage, they would just be incorporated into that family. Islam came and said, No, no adopt, treat them as your child call them, my son, they can call you father and all that it just has to continue to be to be pointed out that this person is adopted that that they're that they don't actually carry your blood. They're not actually your your your

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children from your blood. And that's the only issue when it comes to adoption. Adoption brothers and sisters is an extremely important Islamic practice. Extremely important Islamic practice. It is core it is fundamental within our deen to adopt orphans and children who don't have anyone to love them. And the Prophet Allah has taught us that in his home had 18 children whom he took care of only six of them were actually his

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12 children were not hits, he took care of them because they they either their fathers had passed away or their mothers had passed away, or both. The concept of cafeteria team is something that I find that we don't really talk about a lot in our deen. And it's kind of put to the side, when we're the OMA that has the most reasons to actually do the opposite, like our own Ardene or religion or faith, our teachings that what his legacy Are you slaughter wisdom is filled with the concept of taking of adopting orphans. The only reason that we don't do it in my opinion, is because there's of this small detail. Now that well, he can't, this person can't carry my name. So what actually

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carrying your name is a lie, to say that they're actually your blood. That's not that's lying to them. It's lying to them. They say, well, we don't want to lie to the child. So we let them grow up with no parents at all. That's the alternative that we're offering here. And who's this person already lost their parents, you think knowing that is going to make it worse. Of course not. Look, never has a lie, you've been better than the truth. And the history of the world. Never has lying been better than you can. I'm not telling saying that you tell this to a three year old. But once they're old enough to reason that you will understand that we are your family, and we love you. But

00:28:17 --> 00:28:43

this is the this is your specific situation. And it'll it'll hurt. But they'll deal with it. And then they'll go from it. And they'll move on. And they'll continue to value the fact that they had people taking care of them. But at least they're living their truth. They're living their truth. There are cases, cases you can read online, you can actually look this up of the devastation that occurs to people who find out later in life that they were adopted.

00:28:45 --> 00:29:21

And what it does, like, psychologically and psychiatrically, like in terms of how it affects the psyche and the mental wellness of people, when they find out later by maybe a DNA test of some sort, that they're not actually and the parents knew, but didn't want to tell them so they wouldn't hurt their feelings. This is devastating and causes it's very difficult. Being honest, has never has never been the wrong. I think another piece of why people don't bring in any orphans is that there's always well, if it's a boy and the lady can she take off her hijab and all this other stuff. And there's actually a lot of leeway when it comes to this. There is a lot of leeway within the field a

00:29:21 --> 00:29:40

lot in terms of of that being that being the case, even if the child has been being brought in his four or five or maybe older. There's a lot of flexibility when it comes to these things. And you just need to talk to a an imam to explain to you where where the flexibility lies. If you're thinking about about adopting a child,

00:29:41 --> 00:29:44

we for sure have to do this. As an OMA, we for sure.

00:29:45 --> 00:29:59

There's one or two examples in this community and they don't like me pointing them out yet, so I won't just out of respect for them. But they they went through the process of adopting a child and going overseas and bringing them with them and taking care of them. And it's a beautiful thing. And I think we should have a bit more interesting

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that as Muslims specifically, especially when our our our Muslim brothers and sisters around the world are actually go, they go through, they go through these types of calamities and these types of misfortunes and their war and natural for natural disasters and they these children require hope doesn't mean that you're faulted for wanting your own children. You know, that's the most natural thing in the world to have your own child and love your own child. But consider doing what he did out of his salon to set on his life. He was an orphan too. And he needed taken care of and he was taking, he was taken care of Imagine if he wasn't what we would have missed out on how the story

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would have been different.

00:30:38 --> 00:30:42

So he took care of his a he called him David Mohammed, of course, after Islam

00:30:43 --> 00:30:55

actually became the Prophet and Islam was was revealed to the Prophet alayhi salam and the ruling was that his name, his name would be Zaid, even Hadith that he has because his father was known that broke his aids heart.

00:30:56 --> 00:30:57


00:30:58 --> 00:31:15

he prided himself that he was called Zaid ibn Mohammed. Imagine if you're given that you're the son of Muhammad, Allah Allah Muhammad. So in Islam revealed, Allah revealed to the Prophet and so no, no, he has to be called by his proper name. Saint even Hadith xanes heart was broken. So Allah subhanaw taala made it up for him.

00:31:16 --> 00:31:20

Anyone want telling me how someone some of you know you're gonna give it a shot?

00:31:21 --> 00:31:55

Because I use it again. Yeah, so he's the only Sahabi whose name is in the Quran. The only one the only one no one else know that we're gonna go to now Omar Obachan has called for Hebrew but not his name. Right? Other than we're talking about but not the name. The only person whose name is in the Quran from Kabbalah say you don't mean How about Allah? So Allah so Allah subhana took away from him that that be being being called Seven Muhammad and offered him here Your name will be a 30 Hasina name from now on every time you say you get 30 faster because of this in the Quran is a part of the revelation of Allah subhanho wa taala.

00:31:56 --> 00:32:32

And that shows you in my opinion, for a child or for someone who was ripped away from his family, to choose someone over their own family, and it wasn't a whim. It's not like he said that that day when he grew up, he left no, no, they'd never left. Zaid spent all of his life with the Prophet alayhi salatu salam said he was most beloved person to the Prophet it is so awesome. Oh Buckaroo would say the reason I'm Khalifa is that they passed away Moto is he was murdered in moto so I'm Khalifa but I wouldn't be Zaid was still around that was about to start process. They do have that status and the Prophet Alia solders, it was called headwater Sudler the most beloved person with the Prophet Allah,

00:32:32 --> 00:32:32

so it was

00:32:34 --> 00:32:53

and just shows you His humanity, the human side, the fact that, yes, I tell you all these things about him, but what was it like living Sometimes you see people were extremely successful. But to be close to them is a nightmare. Like to work with them or to live with them as a complete nightmare, because they're either perfectionist, or they're just very, like there's something with their character that you just can't stand.

00:32:54 --> 00:32:59

In my opinion, this story exists, just so you know, what he was like, and he saw as a person.

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Zaid chose him over his own family. Now I live I live with him didn't even didn't, didn't hesitate. I'm sure for sure. You have no idea. This person here you have no idea who this person is? No, of course, I'm staying with him. What I saw from him, I don't know exists anywhere else. So I'm going to be with him. And his father later in life wouldn't would tell him I don't blame you. His father later, a decade later would tell him Yes, I understand. Now. I understand why you chose him. So Allah Muhammad sallallahu alayhi salatu salam.

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And that's just a piece of his character. And that's who he was. He was someone that once you got to know, I love the way I see Natalie describes him saying that he says something like fun like he would say this man Rahu but he hadn't herb, whoever sees it for the first time, revered him. Woman Holika, whom I refer to as a hub. And once you get to know him a little bit, you fall in love with him. So Hola. Hola, Seibu, cetera. But in order to be someone like that, you have to be someone who's very kind, very compassionate. Someone who's in service of those around them at all times. When someone those around you feel that way that you're always you're always serving them, you're

00:34:08 --> 00:34:40

always looking out for them, always trying to stand by them, help them support them, give them what they need you when you when you educate you do it with love, even when you discipline you do it with love. They always want to be around you. They want to be around you want to stay, they want to want to be taken away. How do you heal salatu salam, which is why they didn't, didn't want to leave and stayed with him. So that kind of that piece of the story again, I'm just adding up all of the experiences and all the aspects of who he was before prophecy, just to let me talk about prophecy, you know, the background or the context. So that's a part of his any of his character. What are the

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final parts I'm gonna talk about? Do I have time? Good, excellent. So what is the rebuilding of the cob? I had it like this story. This is a nice story. I want to only lose. So what happened was a flood occurred in Mecca, and if you ever lived in the Middle East or that part of the world, it doesn't rain very often, but when it does, it rains and when it rains is the point.

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Wherever you can't, you can't it causes floods. And almost every year within that part of the world, there's one or two floods now they're prepared for it. I think recently there was one in Jamaica that actually caused a lot of problems and cars were carrying down the highway and it was a problem. So when it rains, it rains very heavily. So a flood occurred in Mecca. And it was heavy enough that it actually actually damaged the cabin to the point where the walls caved in and they fell in to the cabin now was not didn't look the way it looked. If you look up there you can see the different times and the kind of the way Ibrahim built it the guy but didn't wasn't actually a cube. The cabin

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was like a, it had a it was it was a wall. It had a wall from here, three walls that were obviously perpendicular to one another, but then it was like a circle a half circle on the other side. Today, if you look at the carpet today, you see a cube and then you see this little half circle in front of it called huddling in that area is happening where they say I smade Alec Instagram was was was left by by his mother, but that's actually a part of the car but that's why if you watch if you're someone who likes watching the channel that shows you the car, but when it's when it's fuddled, saw like motherboard Isha or Fajr or something. They don't pray in sight. But during Tarawa, you'll find

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people's praying in sight. You can't pray a fuddled inside the Kaaba, we can pray a sunnah inside the Kaaba. So if you so if you go there and you're lucky and it's very difficult, obviously during Ramadan, but if you're very lucky in your close up during the weekend, go and pray inside the hustle, you might do this when I was young, my father used to drop me off. He used to work nights and my short termism in Harlem to drop me off and I would have a little suggestion and go because I'm small I was 14 or 15, I kind of zigzag and find my way or write in from the cabin, if lucky. And there's a spot I would get myself inside the the huddling to pray to pray sooner. It's a beautiful

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place to be. So it was built. That's kind of how it was built. But when it felt when it was fell, they when they rebuilt it, they couldn't find enough rocks that were proper. So they built it like a cube and just made the lining of the house clean. And it stayed like that for a long time. And it stayed like that till this day. And I'll talk about that later in Charlotte because the profiles and didn't actually change it for a reason that I'll discuss in another halacha. But the problem now the camera fell down. It's no damaged. So they have to rebuild. So they're standing by each other. So how do we rebuild this and we'll use Madeira was one of the standout coalition of the nobles of

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coalition, one of the leaders of coalition he said, we rebuild it all together all of the tribes of Kurdish all of the known tribes participate, but we only use money that is halal.

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That has no rebar in it. Use the word nobody but in a tie. I'm saying hello. Nobody ever Enderman why? Because they knew that rebar was haram. That's the same as the teachings of Abraham Elisa, even Quraysh. Even the people of Joe Healy, you know, the robber, that usury is money that is unclean. It's impure money, it's wealth that is that is taunted as wealth that is taken from a source that is not pure, appropriate, appropriate. It's not, it's not there, it's not clean money. Even the people of Quraysh knew that. So here we're gonna build the car, but we can't bring in wealth that doesn't have river. So once he said that the people who had brought their cartons of money, they went back

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home, because everything they brought was all his all the money they got from usury. He's like, Well, how are we gonna build this? I don't know, find the sources of money that's halal and bring it every bit in it. So the actual amount of money they put together was small. So they couldn't build a car but the way they should build it. Your understanding that's why it wasn't built properly, because they didn't have money. Well, that they could say is pure. It didn't have River in it is fascinating to me. It is it's fascinating that people have John Healy actually even thought of this.

00:38:37 --> 00:38:53

That they thought that they considered it they talked about it, that oh yeah, it has to be pure wealth. It can't be an Ebow Well, it's gotta be usury gotta be based on usury. But they knew that no, we're gonna build the Kaaba, it has to be pure wealth. What's more important the Cobham or the, the bones and muscles and organs of your children.

00:38:54 --> 00:39:04

What's more valuable by far your child is so when you build when you're nourishing your child make sure you're using pure wealth. Make sure it's halal don't don't

00:39:07 --> 00:39:12

I don't want to I don't want to share with you that hadith that are that are painful. They're painful when it comes to this stuff.

00:39:14 --> 00:39:56

Now but I mean so often for now I will be that which which is which is nourished and nurtured through through man that's haram, then the fire is more appropriate place for it. Then Jana is. So watch out what he knew they shouldn't they shouldn't build the Kaaba with usury money and I'm telling you, we should know better to, to use, watch out, make sure you're very, very particular and precise with the source of your wealth. May it be smaller amounts may not be as rich as you want to be. But I won't be able to stand up and say my money is halal. I would never take a sentence not huddled under any for any reason. have less of it. Have less of it. Don't be as successful as you

00:39:56 --> 00:40:00

dream. drempt don't don't go to the whatever

00:40:00 --> 00:40:36

where you want to go every every every year don't don't have the you know the brand new car and don't renovate. But say that my money is valid. I've never bought into my house and never fed my child, something that is not halal. That is very valuable as Muslims is something you have to think about. And I'm saying, I'm saying this to the brothers, because you're responsible for the wealth in your family, you're responsible for that. You are, as I pointed out that enrolls you're the you're responsible to take care of your family financially, so make sure it's valid. So they talked about it, they put together a small amount of money, they bought the rocks that they need to buy in, they

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buy all the they bought all of the equipment that they needed with what they had, they found out they didn't have enough to actually build it the way they didn't want. They didn't want to build it. But they were able to build at least something that was reasonable. So they start building, all of the tribes are participating in building. But everybody is eyeballing this one rock as they go. It's like you're carrying a rock and you're looking at another one. You come back and you kind of still looking at it, making sure it's still there. You pick up another rock and you're putting up but you always can just looking everyone's looking to see if that rock is still there. And hydrated is when

00:41:06 --> 00:41:39

the rock from Jana, the rock, the prophet, the prophet, Allah, you saw some talks about the rock, the rock, and Ibrahim Ali is that I thought I would preach about this is something that is special. There's something that you believe the Holy Spirit offered them as Abraham in his mind built. So it's big deal. So they're putting they're fixing, they leave the rock, Neil hudgell Eswatini. And they leave that quarter till the end. They're building the whole Kaaba, and they leave it till the end, consciously, but not really talking about it. And then they come to the point where it has to be inserted. So they're standing there. You know what, you guys seem to have put it in? Oh, no, no,

00:41:39 --> 00:41:52

no, I'll put it in you. You haven't had your lunch yet? No, it's alright, I just ate you. Go, go take your break, I'll put it in. Three minutes later, they were putting their hands in buckets of blood, saying that either I put it in or we all die today.

00:41:53 --> 00:42:17

And every tribe was bringing in their men and their storage were out. And they were staining their faces with blood ready to go to war over who's going to put this back? Because of the honor and the legacy and the and the the reputation of being the person who put the hydro ESA in its place. And are you funny, I don't know why. I really, I do know why but

00:42:19 --> 00:42:34

but that's how they were. Money wasn't as important as as reputation as integrity. As honor. That was way more important, the honor of putting the word meant I'll die for it. And it became to the point where Qureshi was going to have a civil war. So we're leaving with Iran.

00:42:35 --> 00:42:42

I just want to I want to point out something to you before I go into the story. Before they were able to build, they had to, they had to actually

00:42:44 --> 00:43:06

dig up everything. So the walls that fall caved in, but in order to build you have to remove everything, right? So you have to actually kind of tear down what's left of the Kaaba. So they're all standing there. And they're like, alright, you can start tearing down. No, no, it's okay. You can take the the honor of hitting the first No, no, I want you to take it. And then no one would do it. You know why?

00:43:07 --> 00:43:38

I'm gonna tell me anyway, anyone know why? You're good? Yeah, so the last person who tried to tell them the car but didn't go very well for them. The last person who came in with the intention of changing the car, but didn't, things did not turn out well for them to their minds. Like I saw what happened to elbow and his army, so I'm not going to tear down anything. So they no one wants to everyone stood there with their axes in their chisels, and no one would touch it. So we didn't move Iran said alright, and he stood there and he said, Oh Allah, Allah who made nicotrol mo anima. And then Mr. attina, li, not with the BTech and haram, oh, Allah, you know that we didn't come to

00:43:38 --> 00:44:09

actually harm the cabin, and he would hit the first tax and then everyone would run. And they would all run home and everyone's waiting for like a bolt of lightning to destroy lead or for them all to get sick and die at night. Everyone was fine. The next morning, they came back, everything is fine. You're feeling well when nothing's going on. All right. And they tore down the rest of the Kaaba. So even from the even the people of Shahidi. They knew Allah, they understood what it meant. They had problems with their belief system. There was something that was fundamentally corrupt, which is why the Prophet alayhi salam had to teach to preach the teachings of Abraham Ali salaam, but they still

00:44:09 --> 00:44:36

knew God. And they understood that there was a relationship and they stood, they knew how to respect that. So they're fighting now over putting the hudgell S word. So really, it comes back again. And he says, how about we we do this in a in a way that's fair to everyone? We use Quran, meaning we use luck to dictate who puts it in. So what's the luck at this hour of tomorrow, the first person to walk through the duck look at who to walk through this door by the Saddam

00:44:37 --> 00:44:54

haram will be the judge whatever this person says we accept if they if it's if he's from this tribe, or that tribe or whatever tribe, then that tribe gets the honor to put it in and we don't fight over it. And they all said Alright, fine, fair because just like but didn't tell people but that was the agreement. And it stayed in the state amongst them they waited

00:44:57 --> 00:44:59

and then who walks through the door? So Allah Allah

00:45:00 --> 00:45:39

It was time to sit down. This is the preparation of Allah. This is something that Allah subhanaw taala prepared wanted him to do. Why? Because he needs to get testimony before he becomes a prophet, this is towards the end of his 30s. He needed that testimony of his character to be on record by his own people. So this whole story happened so that this would happen would occur. He walks through the door about his setup, they see him walking through Palo Alto, I mean, era Toamasina I mean, era line as a trustworthy one we accept, we accept whatever he whatever he says, we accept the trust. They called him. I mean, meaning his nickname amongst people, is I mean, the trustworthy ones when you

00:45:39 --> 00:46:02

can trust with anything you never never stabbed you in the back. never lied to you never never. That was his nickname. So Allahu Allah, Samuel Solomon, I mean, your turbina we accept it. We accept the trustworthy one. Yes. What's the issue? There's what the issue is, he looks at them, their hands are all staying in blood. Their their stories are out of their sockets. It's like, okay, we're going to do so he took off his boat, Daddy has talked to him. He put it down.

00:46:04 --> 00:46:34

And he put the Hydra on it. And he said, and he made corners. Like he twisted corners from his own government. Yeah, there's gonna be secondary first. And then he made enough quarters for the number of tribes that were fighting. There were six tribes, we meet six corners, and he had a representative from each tribe carry the corner. And then he had them go around the cabin and do seven laps of tawaf. Now this, in my opinion, is one of the most genius things he did out of his Santosa people were upset, people were all hyped up ready to fight after doing southern labs,

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clunking into people carrying a rock, they were tired and they were much more they all that energy that all that negative energy had kind of gone out. So he had them do seven, seven laps or they used to strum around the Kaaba and then bring carry it's right to his spot. And then he pushed it into his salatu salam with his own hands. And he did that and everyone was happy with it, because he didn't actually tell this tribe can do it. Even though his tribe was there. Even though by no avec Manasa were there. And when he walked in there, like perfect, you're gonna let give us the honor? No, some Hola, Hadees. I'm saying that no, no. This is the honor for everyone. You see that

00:47:10 --> 00:47:26

mentality? Bring people together? Not don't divide them. He could have offered his family the honor. He said no, no, we all do this all together. That day, out of mercy and compassion to his people. He put his hand on the rock and put it into a spot 20 No more than that.

00:47:28 --> 00:48:02

Yeah, 25 years later, he would come to perform hajj, and he would want to go to the hudgell s want to do, but he wouldn't. Because if he did that Ali is awesome. During hijo the fatalities that would occur every year, it would have been so that day, he touched the rock out of mercy to his to the to his people. And 25 years later, he would not touch it out of mercy to his own body, his thought was to them. And you're understanding what I'm trying to say I would have mercy wouldn't touch it that even though he wanted to, and people would have opened up for him to go do it. No, no. You know, if he did it, it would turn into a sunnah then everyone would fight over it and people would die. So

00:48:02 --> 00:48:38

Allah, how do you stop yourself? What did you get out of this? He got he got that testimony. Not only did he show his leadership skills, his ability to de escalate situations, bring people together, make decisions that don't self serve him or his tribe. Think of the bigger picture. Not only did he prove that he saw to Islam, but he also got testimony from his people. And I mean, the trustworthy one. So later on, they can't come and say, Oh, he's always he was always a liar. Some of the highest they can't. When he when he brings us down. They can't say he was Oh, no. What are you talking about? We remember the day where you guys were all happy when you walked through the door.

00:48:38 --> 00:49:07

And you said I mean, I mean, the trustworthy when we accept them, now you're going to talk call them something else. You can't do that. You can have it both ways. Either your slot was there tomorrow, today or tomorrow, two or three more pieces of preparation that I'll talk about inshallah next week. So we may spend next next week, kind of finalizing the first 40 years of his life how to get salatu salam going through all the preps, making sure that we have clarity on them. The week after we'll talk about that beautiful moment of the beginning of the dino and with that inshallah to Allah because we will begin in the moment so by going hunting to Allah, Allah Allah and also Allah wa

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salam ala Nabina Muhammad Ali, Haider Baraka Luffy.

00:49:14 --> 00:49:27

Just a small housekeeping request, I can ask the brothers to move forward a little bit and the sisters to shift back a little bit. I know there's some room in the back and there's some room in the front just so we have a better line of demarcation here.

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You don't want to do

00:49:37 --> 00:49:39

the questions. There's no time

00:50:21 --> 00:50:21

you're streaming

00:51:02 --> 00:51:03

just opened up

00:51:05 --> 00:51:06

you say unconditioned with

00:51:13 --> 00:51:24

Salah Salam Alaikum Alright we're gonna get started shortly inshallah I'm going to be subbing in for the MC today inshallah Lebanon. Alright we're gonna get started shortly inshallah I'm going to be subbing in for the MC

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the code is 9021193

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