Purification Of The Soul – EP05

share this pageShare Page
Abu Abdissalam

Channel: Abu Abdissalam

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode 5/26: Anger (Part 1/2)

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:10

What can the Liga Fina like? Yo hum in Marina? Ma de de Melo? kita.

00:00:12--> 00:00:15

King john, who know

00:00:16--> 00:00:18

what a king, john

00:00:20--> 00:00:21

dv HeMan.

00:00:24--> 00:00:30

Deena are in LA Caleta de

00:00:35--> 00:00:38

la isla de la Houma is sama

00:00:50--> 00:01:21

anger, narrated Mossad, even juggling the apostle of Allah. May Allah says peace and blessings be upon him said, If anyone suppresses anger, when he is in a position to give into it, Allah the Exalted will call him on the Day of Resurrection over the heads of all creatures, and ask him to choose any of the bright and large eyed maidens. He wishes.

00:01:25--> 00:01:32

similar manner AHIMA Salam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh, and welcome to another episode of purification of the soul.

00:01:36--> 00:02:18

In the previous episodes, we spoken about purification, and we said that it involves a number of stages. What are the two stages? Brother Mohammed, that purification of the soul involves? The first is I think, removing, removing any bad characteristics present in a person and replacing it with good characteristics. Exactly. prime example is, if a person has maybe dishonesty in him, and he likes to lie, or he even if he doesn't like to, he just does it unintentionally. And he places that with honesty, exactly brilliant. And by the garage, you can tell me about how does this link to the word desk ear in the Arabic language, the word desk here has a number of meanings.

00:02:19--> 00:02:24

The scale is to purify, to remove and purify and to increase

00:02:25--> 00:03:05

it would be to purify the bad characteristics. Yes. And to increase the good ones. Yes, excellent. And that is the definition of desiccated the force, that you cleanse or cleans the souls from evil and bad characteristics. And then secondly, increase the soul with good characteristics. Let's look now at some of the bad qualities of the heart and soul. And then see the causes of these diseases as well as their evils. And then we'll go on to look at some of the ways we can cure these diseases and remove them from ourselves. And the first disease that I'd like to look at is the disease which is known in Arabic as rabab caught up Who can tell me what that means in English.

00:03:06--> 00:03:17

I think it's doing bad things. I've had a lot of Yes, yes, I know. Yes. Like treating people in bad ways.

00:03:19--> 00:04:07

Something from inside. Yeah. So anger in the Arabic language comes from the word of God in Arabic. And nobody is free from anger. Nobody's free from anger. Did you know that Allah, Allah gets angry? Allah subhanaw taala gets angry in the Quran. We lost planet Allah says, In the Quran, he says whoever disbelieves in Allah after his after his belief, except for him who is forced into it, and whose heart is at ease with faith. But those who open their breasts to disbelief upon them is the anger from Allah, and this will be a great torment. So this shows is it shows very clearly that Allah Spano Tata has anger but on what types of people which types of people, Mohammed does a lot

00:04:07--> 00:04:09

pantalla get angry with

00:04:10--> 00:04:17

upon those who have disbelieved exactly as the ISS very clearly upon those who have disbelieved and in fact,

00:04:18--> 00:04:59

in fact, the anger of Allah extends further to certain types of Muslims as well. Who are those who will, who don't pray, those who don't pray those who disobey Allah and His Messenger salallahu alayhi salam. Likewise, in the same way the prophets would get angry, some of the prophets of Allah would get angry, or las panatela says, Well, Mr. Raja Musa Illa called me he called vana asifa. And when Moosa returned to his people, angry and grieved, and so this shows very clearly that anger is a quality of good people as well, including some of the greatest messengers of Allah, such as Musashi, salatu salam, so angry

00:05:00--> 00:05:40

Say it's not something sensible and it's not considered a disease. But there are certain types of anger that are sinful. And there are certain actions that a person does when he's angry, that are blameworthy. And what is the key thing in blameworthy anger, and that is excessive anger, it causes a person to lose his ability to think straight, it can overtake a person's intellect, it can overtake his religion. Sometimes a person doesn't even know what he's saying, or what he's doing in this state. And this anger, he may lead out to lash out something with his tongue, to give verbal abuse to someone. And this kind of thing, let's have a look at some examples of where anger, a

00:05:40--> 00:06:22

person has done something in the state of anger. But yet, he's regretted what he's done afterwards. Brother Mohammed, I was just gonna say that, you know, one of the best examples of God is, it's even happened to me, I'm sure it's happened to a lot of my friends and other youth, that when we, you know, play play sports or something like this, maybe football or something like that. We don't like the rule or decision that the referee made, or that maybe one of our friends did not like what he did. So we will, you know, probably get a bit agitated a bit angry words, that sort of interrupting was same. So saying some words that bad words, and being rude sometimes, Yeah, I think so. Exactly.

00:06:22--> 00:06:43

And these are the consequences of some of the consequences of anger, we'll touch back on that point. In a few minutes in Sharla, one instance of excessive anger can destroy the relationship between two families, between a husband and wife, between brother and brother, between countries even. And it can even cause wars between people.

00:06:44--> 00:07:23

It can also, if it accompanies a person throughout his life, then people will avoid him. And in the same way he will, he may lose his job, he may lose his family, he may end up getting divorced, he may lose his children out of custody or anything like this. So some of the scholars of the past they said that beware of anger, because it leads you to the embarrassment of having to apologize, and this is the point that you made earlier on. And this is very true. I mean, how many times have we seen people who have acted in anger? And then they've had to go through the embarrassment of having to apologize for their rash? behavior? Let's come back to the earlier point. I'm sure we've all got

00:07:23--> 00:07:30

examples where somebody acted in a rash manner. in a state of anger. Good, Raj, you have anything?

00:07:32--> 00:07:36

Yes, I guess, one of the most famous, most

00:07:37--> 00:08:05

famous examples of road rage. Like many people in the driving, you know, there may be con people outside of the class, as soon as, again, the cars that are in the comfort of their cars, right here and within the if you like the walls of the car. So then, for example, if somebody you know, suddenly pushes into them, pushes in, and you know, in front of them, then that enrages and, and, you know, SAS horning comes out and smashes the window.

00:08:06--> 00:08:15

Exactly. Well, we'll come back to some of the solutions. In the next episode, inshallah, we'll have a look at these examples. Yes, but do you have another example? Well, I think

00:08:17--> 00:08:21

I had a friend of mine, who owns a cafe.

00:08:22--> 00:08:33

You know, sometimes when you have a partner, and you don't know how to deal with your partner, so that what actually happened, and they broke up, like doing

00:08:34--> 00:08:40

some bad things, and an angry man, you know, so that's what did it lead to?

00:08:41--> 00:08:42

The closer coffee?

00:08:44--> 00:09:26

They lost money. So that's one very common example. In fact, I was reading in the paper, about how two very close friends one of them actually ended up killing others because of anger. And this is how evil excessive anger can be. The Abu huraira de la Han who narrated that the prophets I send them a man came to the prophet SAW Selim and he asked him for counsel or advice. And what did the prophet SAW some replies a lot of Don't get angry, don't get angry, and likewise, of the live and I'm not the lavon, who asked the prophet SAW Selim, he asked him for something that would save him from the anger of Allah from the Wrath of Allah. And the prophets lie Selim replied, again, a lot of

00:09:26--> 00:09:40

Don't get angry. And some scholars have commented on the words of the prophets lie, Selim, lot of Don't get angry, and said that he was not actually commanding a person to rid himself of anger itself, but rather to keep control over it.

00:09:42--> 00:09:59

And we can see this very clearly because it's very difficult sometimes for a person to remove his own emotion or his own natural state, if you like. And it's there's always occasions where we get upset and we get angry, we get irritated. But Islam always comes when there are diseases

00:10:00--> 00:10:48

In a person or whether a natural diseases if you like, then Islam comes and tells us to cure by, by controlling the disease as opposed to just simply removing that disease. And we can see that in many instances, for example, Allah says in the Quran z in our in Linda boo chahatein Anissa, that for mankind, for men it has been beautified in them, the love of desires from women. So Allah is telling us that is a natural thing. It's a natural thing for a man to look at a woman and feel any feel some kind of attraction there. But at the same time, Islam comes either Islam comes and doesn't say, remove this, this quality, or this attraction, Islam comes and says control it, through marriage,

00:10:48--> 00:10:53

through marriage through lowering our gazes when we're looking at non Muslim women and so on and so forth.

00:10:55--> 00:11:32

In the same way, anger, Islam doesn't come and say, totally remove your anger. But it comes and says you need to control that anger. And we can see this clearly in the hadith of Maya bingeable. For the love and who who said that the prophet SAW a lovely sunset, if anyone suppresses his anger, when he's in a position to give vent to it, then Allah, Allah will give will call him on the Day of Resurrection over the heads of all creatures, and will ask him to choose any of the bright and large eyed maidens that he wishes. So this is a very clear example of where one is supposed to he has the opportunity to vent it, but he doesn't. Likewise, the Prophet slicin said the strong one is not the

00:11:32--> 00:12:07

one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong one is the one who controls himself while in a state of anger. So we're not commanded to remove the quality of anger from ourselves. But we should act in a way to avoid the potential bad consequences of anger and it's natural for most people to get angry when something annoys them. But we shouldn't we should restrain our anger and keep it under our control, so that it never leads us to do something which is forbidden in Islam. We'll take this on further after the break in sha Allah sallallahu wasallam mubaraka Alana Bina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi.

00:12:24--> 00:12:42

People need each other's needs colors more than they need to drink. And it's because even regarding what we drink and eat, we may not be able to figure out which is permissible and which

00:12:44--> 00:12:59

is not preserved. In the books, Holly, let's see your Prophet Muhammad. Allah is not preserved in the books, but on the heart, in the hearts of men, in the hearts of people who have devoted their time to seek

00:13:00--> 00:13:02

relief and trust

00:13:03--> 00:13:08

that none could take place without the knowledge of follow.

00:13:37--> 00:14:16

Salam Alaikum and welcome back. Before the break, we were talking about how anger is not something that we're obliged to remove totally from our heart. But we have to control that. And forbearance matters most when a person is angry, not when he's happy. This is why I'm delighted and must old Raja Lahore, Thailand who the great companion of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he said that judge a person's forbearance when he's angry, and his trustworthiness when he is craving for something. And he was teaching a very important principle here, that when a person is happy, and content, there's no point in judging his tolerance, because that because in that state, it is easy

00:14:16--> 00:14:46

for a person to be tolerant. what really counts is when a person is tolerant in a state of anger, perhaps when someone has committed an injustice towards him. And we can see a similar example, in the wisdom for appointing an Amir, what is the wisdom I mean, gorillas, we've been told in the prophets I seldom sadhana that when only three people, if only three people or more go on a journey, they should appoint an Amir or a leader. What is the wisdom behind that?

00:14:48--> 00:14:56

So that if there's any disagreements or any sort of arguments, then that means they have to give the final decision. Yes.

00:14:59--> 00:14:59

That's right. So

00:15:00--> 00:15:15

be objective. Yeah, it doesn't have to be that he can avoid all the arguments or if they are, you know, certain almost controlling people, I think you can be objective and he can say, Okay, this is what needs to be done. Okay. But is there any if somebody says I always obey the mayor, when we agree,

00:15:16--> 00:15:21

I, if I agree with me if that's when I obey Him, is there any virtue in that?

00:15:23--> 00:16:06

The whole point of them is, being there is when there's disagreement. Absolutely. And this is what I wanted to the whole point of the Amir is that he should be there when there is difference of opinion when there's disagreement among them. Okay, because he should put a stop to it. So there's no virtue, there is no virtue for a person to say that I am obey the Amir, when I agree with him, the real merit. And this is what matters most is that a person, he puts aside his own view, and then follows the image of when there is a difference of opinion. And in the same way, the real merit of you know, being tolerant is not when everybody's happy, and everybody's, you know, Jolly Jolly. The

00:16:06--> 00:16:49

real merit is when a person is angry, then he begins to tolerate or he begins to, he puts his forbearance into integral, and the causes of anger can be broken down into two primary types. And it's important for us to know the causes so that we can deal with the cures based upon those causes. And so there are two primary types, there's internal types, and external types as for the internal cause, this is what some people have been created with. Some people have been created, with a natural tendency to get angry quickly, and the slightest irritation causes the blood to boil. And it's a test from a Lost Planet, Allah Allah has created people with all different strengths and

00:16:49--> 00:17:29

weaknesses. And this is a test for every individual, one person can find it hard to control his anger, but Easy, easy to give in charity. Another could find it difficult to be generous, but very, you know, he might find it difficult to be generous, but he'll find it very easy to control, his anger and so on and so forth. So everybody's got their own personal weaknesses. So, what is required of the person is to work on these weaknesses, such that he at least reaches a level of acceptance in Islam. In other words, that his weaknesses do not cause him to leave an obligation or to fail in doing a prohibited matter.

00:17:30--> 00:17:52

The Companions have this weakness as well of getting angry, of course, the companions had these kinds of weaknesses. In fact, you'll find that some one of the companions, or some had been said, Don't say Allahu Allahu the prophets lie. Selim, was told about one, a behavior that he or an action that he did in one of the battlefield twos.

00:17:53--> 00:18:28

During the battlefield, a person said, I shadow Allah, Allah, Why should one Mohammed rasulillah this person was a non Muslim, and Osama was just about to kill this person. And one could say that it was anger that led him to continue to kill him. Okay, one could say that, however, when he was explaining this to the Prophet, sly seldom the prophet of Islam he got angry. And he said, Why did you do this? He replied, he said, because He only said the Shahada to save himself. Now the answer, this is one way of looking at this weakness.

00:18:29--> 00:18:34

inshallah, let's have a look at what some of the people outside they had to say about anger.

00:18:36--> 00:19:30

Anger is a natural reaction taken by any person when provoked, an angry person may lose concentration, make fights with other people and lose persons. It is putting pressure on the person who's angry and make him less behavior in front of the people. You can notice someone's angry by the look in his eyes, as he suddenly turns as they suddenly turns red, and he is uncapable of controlling himself. Mentally he is weak, physically, he becomes way more stronger than he could be believe. And I know that from previous experiences, someone gets angry, I get loses control, get frustrated, maybe get anger on somebody. Well, he normally makes irresponsible actions. And

00:19:31--> 00:19:34

it could swear a lot on people and could make

00:19:35--> 00:19:47

fights with them. an angry person. He does a lot of things. One of which he slams doors, he throws things in front of him. He puts His anger into other people like fighting them,

00:19:48--> 00:20:00

beating them, and sometimes it goes into wrong ways like smoking weed pot, or those sort of very interesting comments there. We were talking about the different causes.

00:20:00--> 00:20:41

Is of Angola to main causes of anger we said that there are two types. Firstly, internal causes internal causes when a person is naturally, he naturally feels angry or Lost Planet Allah created different people with different weaknesses. And this person he has the weakness of getting angry quickly, the slightest of any irritation that boils and you know these kind of things. The second type of causes the external causes, on the other hand, and these are based on the environment, a person, he might keep company with people who boast about their anger, and their lack of forbearance, and they speak proudly about how they act in accordance with their anger, and call this

00:20:41--> 00:21:22

bravery or courage. So when a person keeps company with these types of people, he might eventually begin to glorify this excessive anger. And he might think that this is something good. And as the fire of anger gets Avira, the person becomes blinded by this anger, and he becomes less and less prone to listening to advice about his temper, and if someone tries to advise him, he doesn't listen to him. In fact, this actually enrages him further. And if his intellect tells him something that he's wrong, then the anger gets the better of him, and extinguishes any kind of rationale. And he's overcome with blinded emotion that he must act by now. And affects a person differently, effects a

00:21:22--> 00:21:42

person's appearance, both on on his tongue on his limbs on his face. And we can see that so let's have some examples of how anger affects a person. But I think changing in his face color, yes, some people become red. Yes. And his eyes sometimes get red.

00:21:43--> 00:21:46

Yeah, so and the making?

00:21:48--> 00:21:50

like breaking something, or?

00:21:52--> 00:22:10

I think that's only Yeah. Gross. Yeah. And for example, he would begin to get to sweat, you know, saliva will come out of his out of his mouth, and it will kind of characteristic Yeah, and walking up and down, and up and down, you know, doing

00:22:12--> 00:22:51

acting in a way that you wouldn't normally act. And if he was to look at this later on, you think, you know, be embarrassed, exactly be embarrassed items, that really me Can't believe that he may begin to become violent, he may tear things, he may stamp, he may, you know, becomes very, very disgusting. All the animistic characteristics become apparent. And what if the person was not there, they know he's angry with someone who's I've seen with my own eyes, he may even break a window with his business, he may lift up a train and throw for the sake of it. I know a person who actually threw his mobile phone up brand new mobile phone, you know, very expensive, got angry out the

00:22:51--> 00:22:53

window. And he regretted it later.

00:22:55--> 00:22:58

You know, and and in fact, the phone didn't belong to Him.

00:22:59--> 00:23:12

It belonged to somebody else. So he had a big bill at the end of it. And this is some of the problems of angles we can see. Very clearly. And this is actually just on the limbs. We spoken about what about the tongue, I mean,

00:23:13--> 00:23:57

swearing, cursing, cursing, swearing, and all these things are not from the characteristics of a Muslim. In fact, the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said, Man can a young man who Billa he William Arthur, failure called hiren only assumed that if whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, then let him say good or remain silence or remain silent. And this is not from the characteristic of the Muslim. We can see, actually, anger also has an internal effect on a person. Even with the speech, sometimes it's not always the bad words. Sometimes you say things. Yeah, maybe that aggressive tone. Yeah. Or have you say something about a person, which may ruin the relationship? Yes, exactly.

00:23:57--> 00:24:31

That's a very, very good point. Because some people to people, they may be good friend, a person says something in a state of anger. But it and he may not even mean what he's saying. But the other person, he's listening to this, he says there's no smoke without fire, he must have meant that. And this can actually ruin a person's relationship with somebody else. And this actually is just simply all these characteristics of a person. All of these characteristics, whether it's on the face, whether it's on the limbs, whether it's on the tongue,

00:24:32--> 00:24:57

all of this put together, it's just a reflection of what is inside and what's inside is actually much worse. Things like person may have hatred in his heart, rancor, malice, jealousy, envy, and all these different characteristics, all of which have been prohibited in some form or fashion in the area of Islam. inshallah, in the next episode, we will look at some of the ways that we can control

00:24:58--> 00:24:59

blind anger.

00:25:00--> 00:25:16

And we can see some of the what some of the things that a person can do. A person who suffers from this extreme anger was Salatu was salam o Baraka ala nabina. Muhammad, what other early he was at the edge mine. I said I'm alikum warahmatu Allahi wa barakato