How To Increase Self Esteem

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Yassir Fazaga

Channel: Yassir Fazaga

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Episode Transcript

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Just as lolicon My question is helping to increase the self esteem in children. Okay, good question. By the way, self self esteem, the way self esteem is brought into us is that it's our environment that either determines where we have a low self esteem or a high self esteem. And that is why again, I take back the example of slavery because slavery, it was a systematic way of convincing the slave that he or she is nothing but a slave. And for this, they employed all psychological tricks to convince the person that they are absolutely no good, and the fact that they are slaves, that is their destiny, and they should be accepting of their destiny. So what did they do? Now listen to

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this, they would go into public humiliation, so that black people would be gathered, and they will be taken all naked in this, they'll just be paraded naked in the streets. Now, that is part that's very disrespectful. But the idea is, we are going to absolutely leave you will not even an iota of self respect. So we're going to make you naked in front of every Joe unmown. And then they would say, for a whole month, you're not supposed to take a shower. So you are now so filthy, so dirty, so unclean, that you hate yourself. Not only that, but you also hate the people who are like you. Because now everybody, every black matter was not taken. So you don't want to be with your own.

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Because they've been deprived of that your God given right to clean yourself. And the idea is, we're going to do this to you. In addition to it was public humiliation, we're going to call you names. We are going to call you a nigger, we're going to call you a big huge man is called boy, your boy, you do this boy, you have young kids looking into a big old man, say, Boy, Come here, boy, you do this. So I'm going to use derogatory terms. And I will use them publicly in order to crush your spirit. Sometimes, as parents, and sometimes as cultures, we are guilty of this. We crush the spirits of our youngsters. We call them names. We tell them they are not capable of doing this. They're not capable

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of doing that, that they have no opinion to voice that we're going to make decisions for them. They have no ability, they have no right to voice, their concerns or their opinions. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would deal with people, and he would use them in such a fashion that truly nourish their self respect. tell you a story that Javelin Abdullah, a famous Companion of the Prophet Solomon was one time feeling very sick, he was not feeling well. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam went to visit him. Now until here, the story is very, very ordinary. So it's okay, so somebody got sick, and of course, he's going to visit him. But what makes it an extraordinary

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story is this, that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam was 57 years old, and Javelin Abdullah was 16 years old.

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So what happens is that you haven't 57 year old man going to visit a 16 year old young boy. Now why is this the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, that is part of self respect. Fatima would walk in the process of them would get up and you'd have to sit there. See brothers and sisters, they say that children attention pay to what you do, not what you say.

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Children attention pay to what you do, not what you say. So they see how you treat them.

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They don't hear what you're saying. But they see it. They see what is going on.

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You know, sometimes we lie and we expect our children's not to lie. Somebody made a phone call. And the son picked up the phone and the Father and the Father said Who is it? And the son said, it's also and the father said, Tell him I'm not here. I am not here. So the son doesn't know anything. He said, My father is here, but he told me to tell you that he is not here. Okay. And he hung up the phone. So the father came to him and slapped him on the face. He said, You idiot. You are making me look very bad. said this will teach you a lesson. And indeed, a lesson was taught. So the next time the phone rang.

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The kid picked up the phone. And it was the father's friend and said is your Father and the Father is not listening to what's going on. And the kid hangs up the phone. So he comes back to the Father and said the father said who was on the phone. And he said it was so and so friend of yours. Another friend said but Daddy, don't don't

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Don't worry about it. I took care of it. I told him that you're not here.

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Okay? So what happened is that many times it is the information that we convey to people. It's what we tell our children. So how do you notice them? respect them? Really, really respect them? Have them it's okay to voice their opinion. Sometimes it's okay to voice their objection. You should have boundaries, yes. But you should also give them you know, a freedom to express them. And the minute you do this, when they want to say no outside if they have been taught at home that it's okay for them to say no. When they are adults out there one day, they will also say no, but if at home they were told that they absolutely have no right to say no, when they go out there. They will also be

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the complacent people that we were breathing. They will be the slaves that we were making at home. They will be the slave that we were cooking inside our home. And at that point, we're just breeding more slaves. We are bringing on weaker people we are bringing into our society people who absolutely lacks self respect.