How to Balance Your Life!

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Waleed Basyouni

Channel: Waleed Basyouni

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Episode Transcript

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So the young men travel days and nights, weeks, and even months until he reached that man, old wise man to ask him how, how to be happy in life. So he said, he found that he's not the only one seeking this man's advice. Matter of fact, there's a long line of people ahead of him. So when his turn can the young man, the old mental and young man, what did you hear for everybody there for some reason, he said, I want you to teach me how to be happy in my life.

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Then he said, Now it's became too late. I only have a designated time for counseling people. But I will give you an exercise to see how good you are first. And if you pass it, I will teach. He said, What should I do? He said, I want you to take that the spoon. And he put on the spoon drops of oil.

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And he said, I want you to take a tour inside the mansion, from inside and outside and see if you can do that in 10 minutes and come back. So the young man put the spoon for the oil and started walking. All the plays, came back exactly 10 minutes. You know what thinking the tea is a good man who deserve to be given the secret of happiness. So the old man asked him, did you tour the house? He said, Yes. He said, Were you a Did you pass by that Turgeon carpet that I bought from Iran, when I visited in this in this year? said No, I haven't seen that. I was like, just trying to come here in time. He said, What about my library? Did you see my collections? No, I didn't said Did you see

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the different type of flowers and how the arrange them and the outside and how they are? The colors? Just match one another? even notice that? And he said, Did you see these paints? And he saw asked me about things in the house? They said No, I haven't seen any. He said, Okay, I want you to go to another tour. And I want you to notice all these unique things. And I will ask you, how many of them you will remember. So the young man went back and started doing the tour again, focusing what's here, what's there because he has to walk fast. By the time he came back, he lost what the drops of oils.

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He lost. He said you lost the oil. You couldn't keep the all of the spawn said yes, because I was looking left and right and trying to see this going down to.

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So the meal The old man said to him, he said, The Secret of Life is to enjoy life, while you still keeping and maintaining your duties. In another one in another way. If this man was able to balance between keeping the all the drops of oil inside the spoon while he's enjoying life, he wouldn't be sucks he would succeed. Actually, it was just the lessons for that person to tell that person the secret of happiness in life is to be able to balance your life. That's absolutely phenomenal. absolutely absolutely correct. The more the people have balanced in their life, the people who knows how to balance their life, the more happier they are. The people who knows how to balance their

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life, the more successful they are. And the moment you lose balance parallel, the moment you lose balance, the moment you don't enjoy and put this in every aspect of your life. Look, if you lose balance in your relationship with your family, you lose balance in your business. You lose balance when it comes to relationship with society. When it comes to relationship with the last panel with Adam, if you just think about it, how important this concept is. And I don't see any reason for us as Muslims especially not to be balanced in our life, or Lost Planet. Allah made us the oma of Rasul Allah subhanaw taala said in the Quran, Waka danika jalna motto was alpha, beta kuno, Shahada and

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anass any Mita kuno. Dude, Allah Subhana, Allah to Allah said, that you have made this nation a nation of warfare also that means metal and all of the meaning of Warsaw has so many meanings was one of the definitely is balanced, because you said exactly in the middle. And you might try to read it the Tafseer was off. It means just because justice it means not to go to any one of the two extremes. This way, God why. And it's so unique that this is verse number

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143 I don't know if you know what that means. So

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this is a versus sort of. It is 286 verses. So that's just fall exactly in the middle of the verse of the soul of the surah. Anyway, Allah Subhana Allah also said

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orbitally female

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Allahu

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kameena dunya Allah subhanaw taala said, But seek through that which is alive, giving you the home of the hereafter. And yet, don't forget your share of this world. Yet Don't forget you're sharing the world and this one too bit to build that balance between the hereafter and the dunya this worldly life and the next this life that you have in the next. That's why

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I'm sad Rahim Allah is a great scholar of Tafseer modern days he said, he stemtech

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distinta and nihil Thema de Naka, what

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this verse means enjoy you dunya your life, this worldly life in a way it will not affect your relationship with Allah and it will not make you lose the hereafter lose, lose the other and abuse will allow

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them to sell man in fallacy so that you have said the truth in regard to what in regard the advice the salon and fantasy have given to EBIT da da da da da, sell man give a beautiful advice to EBIT da da. He said to EBIT da da in New York because

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we're in Alina sicherlich haka, when a mechanic for article lady hopped in

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Abu Dhabi was giving a beautiful advice by Solomon in fantasy which he said, Allah is right upon you, as well as your soul your body has right upon you, as well as your family as right upon you. You should give each and every one his right.

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When the prophecy heard that from St. Man, he said, You have said the truth. You have said the truth hamdulillah neurobion St. One of the companions, one of the writers of the qutab in NaVi sallallahu sallam, he said, once I met Abubakar, tell me how you find yourself. You're humble enough aka humble. I think I'm hypocrite. Then I would have said to Pamela what you saying that's wrong. Don't say anything like that. Then he said yes. When I was when I attend the prophets are sometimes gathering and classes and reminder. And he reminded us of the agenda. And

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I, I feel as if I see it in front of me my Eman score very hard go up.

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Between a leave the prophets

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of

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Allah.

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When we go back home, with her family, with kids, with spouses with work with this busy life, things change. I don't feel the same way I don't think of that. I didn't see the paradise so far in front of me like the way I see it when I'm tending the process of gathering or reminder when I pray with him. Then he said that's why I feel I'm heartbroken. I'm one day one time like this and one time like that, then

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I think everybody feel the same. And it's impossible that everybody is a hypocrite. He said everybody feel the same energy do magic.

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Let's go to the prophets of Salaam ask what the prophet sallallahu Sallam told them. He said to them salatu salam Ala Moana de Matic una una indeed. With dick loss of ahead common maraca to add a photo Tsukamoto cart, if you remain in the same status of the amount that you have, while you're attending the gathering and the reminder on the classes and the follow up. If you maintain that level of demand, angels will shake your hand and you're in the streets and it will come to Greene Jr. votes. But you can reach up level sir.

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Sir,

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that is basically one time one hour like

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another word, you you, you know that it is not a balanced life that you love like this all the time. That were you thinking that your mind will be 110% that's not that's not even about it's impossible.

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But he said some a lot excellent one time you're gonna be like that. And one time you gotta be like, that's when you are attending the reminder, your event goes high enough. When your work to go a little bit you go back to balance it again, that's normal life, to balance between the dounia and the to balance between the right of your own soul upon yourself, the view yourself. There is a right for your own body, it has to be fulfilled versus the rights of others. So many times we care about our spouses and our family in the expense of our own selves.

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And I say that and I'll say it again.

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So many times we care about our spouses and our, our family and our children's in the expenses of our own. So sometimes, yes, we sacrifice with this, but not in the expense that you harm yourself. It has to be balanced, it has to be balanced. So many times family comes our sister usually comes in Tommy, I'm only living this life with this man just because of the kids. And I thought, you know what, I think you're wrong. You're wrong. Yes, maybe in search. But in certain situation, he she, as I said, you know what you save yourself. Because if you continue this way, if you continue this right, you're not going to be able to get Joba, you're both going to be basically going to be lost

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cases.

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So sometimes we don't balance that also balance the right of my family and the right of my community. Now as between the right of the spouse and the right of the children.

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spouses often forget after the children arrive, and became the focus on them, not on the spouse,

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balancing between spending, and your solve and enjoying what a lot of giving you and also between wasting and being stingy and holding back to balance between the mind and the soul and the heart to balance between material, materialistic things, and also spiritual things to balance when it comes to dealing with

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the issue of the unseen world versus the same world to be balanced in the way you did with your time. There is a lot of people need to know how to balance their time how to manage their time. So I can go on a very long list. And I think each and every one of us, maybe need a workshop maybe need a little talk in each one of these areas. But what we're trying to do today, and a quick reminder to all of us is to raise awareness about the concept of having a balanced life, then I will share with you a few points, I hope that you can focus on all of them or some of them that it will help you to build the balance in any area in your life.

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So these coming points to allow you to help you to develop that skill of building a balance the concept of having a balance in your life that you can apply it in any areas in your life. Number one

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one of the things that helps a lot to be balanced in your life

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that you almost look for the positive things and people or situation that you're in. Don't ever focus human beings for so many for for whatever reason, we tend to focus on negativity, you know, that's immediately will never help you to be a balanced person. So Matter of fact, those who focus more and positive there is more balance and more balance

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and focusing on positivity will balance your life and then there'll be someone give a beautiful example and that is like Houston he said life for como mina dendrobium in her in Kenya Amina Amina and relationship the process someone said that don't hate your spouse. If you dislike something in your spouse that is something else you will like there is something else you will find that you like

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banana ties and turkeys and salvia well it turkeys and an EJB and that's not again is the balance to focus on the in the positive because that will balance things in your mind. And instead of just hating your spouse and leave let them go you focus on the positive and abuse a lot of them enter he visited enter the house of a man who was sick zap on the visa Salama Robbie Salalah alayhi salatu salam when you saw him say he's a high fever, he was so sick. Caitlyn

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tonko lab so as the person habit he's about to shower, this sickness purification because every sickness is purification. So the prophet or someone want to focus on what and the positive aspect of it. I know he's tired, but the man don't want us to see the positive aspect. He only focused on the pain. So he said

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no, it's not purification. Here home metaphor. Here hamato Allah shaking cabbie to zero.

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said this is a very high fever, very strong pain. That is an old man suffering from it, and it will lead me to my grave. Then in the Bissell alone, he

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told him

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if that's what you expect, that's what you're gonna get.

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In two days he died.

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And this originally in Buhari inauguration and money into the covenant

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Later on the man died, but just negativity, negativity negativity, it will make you absolutely lose balance. It will make you divorce your spouse, it will make you be unjust and unfair to people, especially to individuals, when people focus only on that shareholder that day, or that group or this organization, or this massive mistakes and of this business mistake, and that's the only thing that you focus on, you will lose balance and you will be unjust and unfair to people. But if you start focusing on the positive and seeing it in a balanced manner, things will change. Number two, in order for you to have a balanced way of life and balance and looking at things, be optimistic

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person and then put them together because very close to each other, be optimistic, those who are pessimistic.

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We cannot have a balanced life panela pessimistic people will be pessimism is kills the concept of balance life

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and abuse. Allah Larson used to be an optimistic person, he loved optimism. So

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look at the Prophet sallallahu Sallam in one of the most famous incident, the incident of when the people are sorry, the incident of above, when the buyer projected the purchase and then treated the process, even physically behind the part of them, plus the emotion of rejection and hurt

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the hurt the person emotionally and physically. So maybe in a moment, if you think it's a moment of weakness, where he's so

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emotionally now by the rejection that he got from those people. And all of a sudden jabril come to him with the end with the angel introduced to the possum as an angel, the angel on charge of the mountains. He said give him an order right now and he will destroy this whole entire village. He said no, no, because they might be good. They might change in the future. No, he said La la la Goswami that might come out of them. A generations will come later on out of them who worship Allah I'm not going to ask for destruction very optimistic. He looked very facile allow me Ronnie was sending them that's why those who have those passages people those who always look for that bad bad

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bad bad gonna happen, you know what they do, they just put themselves lock themselves up in the dark trying to haul a rotten dark, tiny home and they don't enjoy the spacious beautiful life around number three.

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One of the last clear ways of losing balance and had a

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psychological problem like I call it which is a no minded way of thinking. And this can be manifested in two ways and be pay attention to it because a lot of people have this mentality, very narrow minded. And this can be manifested in two ways. One, that you don't give people many options, those who live with life with no options with no money options always unable to balance their life. Those who deal with others that is either this or that and I give you no option otherwise you will be judged by me those people usually cannot balance their life can unbalanced their life you know the successful Dyer the successful or the successful share is the one will give people options not

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strip people from options. Islam never asked if you notice in Islam, there is always options available and it's just not one or two. And then maybe socialism almost opened up but don't misunderstand me I'm not saying option to play games with the religion no option in the process of the Sharia. But the Sherry I have plenty of options when it comes to dealing with people.

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That's why there is always this mentality that it is basically not giving people choices in their life will not help or you don't give yourself multiple choices in your life you will not help yourself to have a balanced life. And the second manifestation of it is the narrow minded also because you go either 100 or zero

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he didn't know how to settle with less than that. It's either I said it is a wine or

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he didn't know how to drink ozarka here it's either you go to the extreme. That's mentality is another psychological problem. In Herbalife, it doesn't work this way. You can just either I want it to be 100% correct. Or you know what, I'm not gonna do anything. You know, either you do this or I'm going to divorce either this show or no show. Either this group or no no action should be done or this no activity should be taking place. Either.

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This, this college or you know what, who cares about education. Flexibility is the key to create a balanced life, a balanced life.

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And I've seen this in so many ways, especially with dealing with others that this is a very big problem in the midst of us losing balance we will get with others. Number four,

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which is being realistic,

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the practicality and be realistic rather than being idealistic, it will help me to have a balanced life, to think in a balanced way. Those who live in the world of dreams cannot be balanced in real drive. Those who, especially I found this with a lot of people who read a lot of books and novels, and you know, especially also in the area, they'll still need a lot of the books, books of a truck that traditional books, who live with the book, they became idealist.

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You know, I was reading that the, you know, the end of his book, you know, just interesting. One of the I was reading the issue of the ruling in regard to the one who don't pray at all. So one of the Hanafi scholars said, What takasaki will call Leah masala to Hialeah to lie.

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He said, to imagine that there is exist a person who don't pray at all that's an imaginary scenario is not it cannot be real scenario.

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Because for him, that's impossible.

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Just give me an example. Sometimes when you read books written another time you live in a minute, you know, live in your car, you don't know what's going on in life.

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You give options and solutions that are not practical, because you live in another world. And that's a that's a big problem. That's a big problem. And I'm saying this because unfortunately, a lot of our youth today are raised by social media, I raised by not a virtual world, not a real world. And that's a big problem and future, what and help them to be balanced in their life and their approach. A lot of people especially when they tend to be religious, they became so idealistic things take things in a very idealistic way. You know, life is not like that. Allah doesn't want us to be ideal and perfect. He didn't create us to be that way. We have to be know how to be practical to know how

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life is and don't again misunderstand me. I'm not saying that the reality is correct always.

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But the reality is reality. You have to deal with the judge Do you know how to deal with

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number five, procrastination, those support estimate they will never have a balanced life.

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inshallah when they get married, a potential cello will come back for head I'm going to start coming to the mustard and the regular bass and cello when the summer comes, I'll start losing weight, you know, inshallah, after this I will start my business when reached 30s are starts making saving. When this I will look for a marriage or giving them so basically, you always press play, and this comes in the next one girl comes in next on my account, and you still keep pushing it back and back and back. And every time you wait for a future you only making your future shorter.

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Every time you wait for your future, the only thing you're doing you make your future shorter. That's what you're doing. You know what, go grab don't just delay don't just wait for it.

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Melis pentatonic I know Yoko mufa Pina Colada. sometta Mustapha Mario.

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It was Santa Maria Medina de abajo. That

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my brothers and sisters, Allah, Allah created us. So emotions are heart, mind and body.

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These four areas, if you don't nurture them, you will not be able to have a very good balance of life.

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nurturing your mind by reading by killing yourself intellectually? Come on. Yeah. And it's enough giving your brain a break. For a lot of people just look for their way easier. The more you intellectually challenge yourself, learning new skills, reading new books, learning something new, that will intellectually stimulate

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you and I saw my kid that day. Don't be like Mike. I told him that day, hey, you need to improve your reading skills. You just can't watch this. Then he turned on the subtitles. So

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I mean,

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I like the way he thing but you know what, it's the same result. I want you to just develop the habit of reading.

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What I'm trying to say here is intellectual you have to nurture your mind. You have to nurture your soul come closer to Allah.

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Law. Read more often pray to your Lord, come early to the mustard. nurture your soul. And there's nothing will nurture a soul with balance that also your emotions you need to be loved to love to care. And this will happen by having a good social life.

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Nurture this because you need it. If you nurture it, if you don't nurture it, these areas, it will lead you not to be able to have balanced life. And finally your body. You know what exercise, give yourself a rest some time, give yourself a rest a break relaxations moment, and hours, they've been the week, work, work, work, work, work, staying late, late late in the night, it's not going to help. So you have a few of your own. If you nurture these four areas, I guarantee you, the way you deal with things in life will be more balanced. Because you're entered from No, enter sell your internally our balance. So you can deal with the external things in a balanced way as well.

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Number seven, knowledge. Because if you have knowledge, you will be able to wait things in the right put things in perspective. Number eight, be patient, self control, those who don't know how to have self control, he cannot balance things in the right way.

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Number nine, take a good role model of balanced people in your life. And the best role model Muhammad SAW someone see and study is life, try to look for this area in the past how he balanced his life, some ideas and how he managed all these areas to cover it in the same time. And excel in each and every one of them. You know what have a good role model in life. Don't be hanging out with losers mediocres. He's not your friends that you look up to.

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It's sad, if they're the most mediocre people in your life or your own parents have beside

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you don't don't look at them as model, look at people who are bound, you can look at them in one area, maybe they are balancing the silly thing, but try to hang out to be around to look up to try to be yourself a role model for your children to be a balanced person. Finally, brothers and sisters, let me end with this. I think one of the most important thing or stupid, the one that the number 11 is to good planning will help you to balance your life with the one that I want to end with. Our greatest way of to balance your life is actions.

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This this subject is not a theoretical, it is actually you leave this homework and you leave this jumar and you have action items in front of you. You're going to do 1234 to cheat things in my life step by step. You know, there is a man who died 2002 2007 by the name of I don't know if I pronounced his name right or not.

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The SRA minhang gentleman he he's from India, he's from India, go heart Village. This man is amazing man, even to the minute movie about his life. This man, his wife was so sick, and he want to take care to the hospital. But the hospital is very far away about 70 kilometers away from where he lives in his village. So he took her Finally, but she died his sweetheart die and the way to the hospital. It's very far away. It's very far, just for the so sad that the hospital just right behind the mountain. So you call the government talk to the Indian government at that time, if they will have a tunnel through the mountain so they can go through so can connect the village to the city to the

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words they're basically education where everything is he call them beg nothing. After the death of his life, he didn't lose balance. You know why? Because he took actions. He decided to make a difference. And for 22 years every day in his life 22 years every day in his life. He will take his axe and he will go to the mountain or stop digging a tunnel with his own hands

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and toes until after 22 years. He went through from one side to another

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by himself. They interviewed him and they told him where anybody helping you he said for so many years have been called the insane the one the man who was mad after his death of his wife. He's

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crazy. Because I'm start doing this on my own. Guess what? What was the result?

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Dark energy curve a path 360 foot long 110 meters through cut 25 feet deep to 7.6 meters and place and 30 feet wide.

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Which is 9.1 meters to form a road through the mount.

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And instead of taking 70 kilometers, it now takes 15 kilometers

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for the first time, the village, they are the school bus tickets, they are an access to medical care. And the man who died with a cancer bladder cancer and he was recognized as a national figure in India.

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But what it takes his actions and man he was known as the mountain man guide and study his life or read about Islam and there is even a movie was made about Islam.

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That's what's really gonna balance your life is not just talking about it. That's why I have an action items for each and every one of us for this coming summer, vacation.

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Make every week there is a special time that you spend with your children.

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For fun, for religious activity. Number two, hurts quality time for your spouse. Number three, participate in activity physical activity in a daily or weekly basis. We have here in this muster every Sunday walk after in the early the morning 7am in the challenger Park

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8am you can come and join us with your family. We used to have a bike club on a wish to see coming back soon. Put a time for yourself to read books, one book just in the summer, one new book to read.

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It's not much with a series of CDs to listen to. If you're not a reading person, time for them a month from now from this weekend. plan what you're going to do for a month. Make sure that you participate at least in one social activity during the summer break. I want you to plan to reach one of your neighbors in your neighborhood, just one neighbor, reach out to them and get to know maybe it will be a good idea to have to establish a new friendship and please when I say friendship, I don't mean to add a friend in your Facebook. Now I mean to add a friend to real life someone to get us to get to know someone that you didn't know before. I would like you to commit to a one week and

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to spoil yourself

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one week and you deserve it. Well I know this mustard, a very hard working fathers. And I know this mustard in this community are very hard working mothers. They deserve a break. You know what children are kids, your family. I'm taking two days break. I'm just gonna go stay in a hotel with my friends. I'm gonna go fishing. I'm gonna go discipleship, you're going to go rafting. I'm going to do do crazy. Do you know bungee jump, I am going to go to Texas, you know city, do skydiving course for three hours, then jump off their plane. I'm going to do just something crazy. Relax for myself. I'm going to go just read a book, relax.

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Just do something for yourself. Make sure that you put that you deserve that. You know I send my wife

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for two days break I said you know what you've been doing a lot of the kids I don't want to just go preserve a hotel.

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You know, God bless Priceline. You don't need to spend much money.

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Just go to sleep. All the kids don't think about anything else. They deserve it. We deserve it. That's something to help you to balance your life. Finally, I suggest Asia in this mustard is 930 it's 930 every day would you make a commitment to come 10 minutes before the show every day? 10 minutes come 20 everyday you know what 920 come here. Just wait 10 minutes read Quran make make your make to just a commandment.

00:33:53--> 00:34:05

These just examples and practical points. You can change it you can add it's an action items to balance the slight malice panatela dunno Yakama for him alone. morpholino hana wife

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Elena was a Latina alum in slo care. calm.

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Rahman on Saturday. How long in Minnesota can

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along in Minnesota

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and tougher on everybody now Elena

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Elena Vienna, Mohammed

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about seven