DONATION APPEAL!

ALL our Projects are FREE and with no advertisements.

We serve millions of downloads a month... Now! Imagine earning on-going rewards of every lecture and quran audio and so on.

As well as helping us cover our running costs and future projects!

mufti menk image

"I really think this is one of the greatest causes one could support"

    Become a Patron
    Donate via PayPal

More Information and Options

The Muslim Family #46 – Parents in the Sunnah

share this pageShare Page
Tim Humble

Channel: Tim Humble

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:04

What are kulu filco Ronnie magia de

00:00:09--> 00:00:16

la colocar La la la de la Lu while Mustafa de

00:00:17--> 00:00:18

leeuw

00:00:20--> 00:01:02

hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was salam, Ana Abdullah he was sorely Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi edge main Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakato. As always, we begin with the praise of a lion by asking Allah to exalt the mentioning grant peace to our messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam to his family and his companions. We're continuing with our discussion on bill o'reilly Deen and this time we've moved on to the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam we're going to start with the hadith of ebihara rob the Allah Wang and the whole Kyle journal Roger learn a lot of spirulina he sallallahu alayhi wa sallam have a call jasola man How

00:01:02--> 00:01:04

could Naseby Hosni Sahaba tea

00:01:05--> 00:01:07

in an aeration be her sneeze server?

00:01:08--> 00:01:16

Call omak call a phone moment. Caller omec color thumb and then color,

00:01:17--> 00:01:27

color film and men color a book with TIFF up an alley and in another narration. Ad knacker some ads NACA and Teaneck.

00:01:29--> 00:01:39

A man came to the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and he said O Messenger of Allah, Who is the most deserving of the people of my excellent companionship.

00:01:40--> 00:01:45

So haverty here it means sir Betty, my excellent companionship.

00:01:46--> 00:01:49

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said your mother,

00:01:50--> 00:02:38

the man said, then who? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam replied your mother. The man said, then who? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said your mother, the man said, then who? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said your father. And in another narration, he said, some dinner cattanach, then the closest one to you, and the closest one to by order of how close they are. This Hadith is a fundamental Hadith as it relates to barrel Valley, Deen. And it relates to personal service, excellence in companionship. And that's why here, if you look at the speech of the scholars here, they don't extract from this, that your mother has three times more right to obedience than

00:02:38--> 00:03:22

your father. And we talk about obedience later on obedience is a matter of difference among scholars, some of them took this Hadeeth to relate to obedience as well, some of them did it. But generally speaking, it's not the topic of the Hadith isn't one of obedience. It's one of excellence in companionship, the way you behave around them. And who is the most deserving of the people, for you to strive to the for that son in the way that you deal with him? And the Prophet sighs? Who said your mother? And that's the first answer. And then three times in total, he answered your mother, meaning that the mother has three times more right to excellence in companionship than the Father.

00:03:23--> 00:03:26

Now the question would be what would make this the case because

00:03:28--> 00:03:55

Allah azzawajal says, generally in the Quran, we're bill Wiley Dini, Santa, be good to both of your parents. And there isn't really that distinction between the mother and the father, until we come to this Hadeeth. So what makes the mother three times more deserving the LMR they say it is what the mother, she has the unique things that she suffered for the sake of her child. So first of all, the pregnancy,

00:03:56--> 00:04:36

and then the labor and the birth, and then the, the feeding and looking after the child when they're very small. These are the things some, and there's a variation, some of them said, the labor, the birth and so on. But generally speaking, it's these things that only the mother can do. Only the mother will carry that child for nine months, only the mother will have the pains of labor and childbirth. And that's why or that's why some of the scholars they put that forward to say that is why the mother is three times more deserving of excellence is an in the way that you treat her and the way you are around her. And again, her server

00:04:37--> 00:04:40

is the way we see the word server being used

00:04:41--> 00:05:00

as it relates to the relationship with the parents in sort of look man while Sahiba Homer fig dounia meroofer accompany them in the dunya so there is a sofa. There is a kind of companionship between the child and the parent.

00:05:00--> 00:05:36

While Sahib homomorphic Dhoni, Mr. opha accompany them in Estonia in the best way, there's a kind of companionship. There's a kind of companionship there. And again, it deals with all of the different aspects so it can deal with how you speak to them, how you behave towards them. And if it's the case that the Father is deserving of a sad, because a lie said, well, beware Lee Dini or Santa to both of your parents, treat them with a sad analyzer just said in May of lohana indical Kibera aha do Houma Oklahoma, if one of them reaches old age or both of them either father or the mother.

00:05:37--> 00:06:19

And yet the mother is deserving three times more than the father three times more than the Father. Then what does that say about the way that you should treat your mother? If the father is the one who is deserving of what will ye Dania Santa, and the father is the one in my above under indical keyboard, I had to Huma Oklahoma, if one of them reaches old age, or both of them valetta lahoma ofit, what and how? Our cola cola and Kadima, they don't say often don't repel them, or push them away and don't and say to them, say to them the best and the most noble of words, if that's the father's right, and the mother has three times that right? Then what is the right of the mother? How

00:06:19--> 00:07:07

can we find the words to express the right of the mother in Islam? Some at NACA attack, then each person according to how close they are. So here's someone might say, Well, what do we say about the siblings? What do we have to say about other relatives, the uncles and the cousins? The statement of the prophets. I said, Look, it's neck and neck, then the one who was the closest to you, and then the next one who is closest to you. And Islam didn't just give importance to being good to your parents. There is also a huge threat of punishment, and a severe warning for those who are not good to their parents. I bought a law narrated from the Prophet sallallahu wasallam and rahima and Thumma

00:07:07--> 00:07:19

Raveena Ma and from Ravi ma M for men Angelica Abba waihi en del kubala. Aha to Houma our Kira Houma, Fela Mia origin Raja home slim

00:07:21--> 00:07:25

IV hora de rates from the Prophet slice m, that he said rahima and

00:07:27--> 00:07:44

rhodium, and it is for the nose of a person to be rubbed into dust, for the nose to be, to be covered or to be rubbed into dust. And this is an expression of a disc of disgrace of Hawaiian

00:07:45--> 00:08:37

and Villa, that a person is disgraced and the person is lower down. And the word he is not necessarily though the nose here isn't just referring to the Norse, but it's it's the normal phrase of Arabic is to use one part to refer to the whole and the Norse is any is used in this expression rahima and that me his nose be rubbed into the dust. And here it is, that the apparent wording is the profitsystem is making against this person three times May his face be rubbed in the dust, may his nose be rubbed in the dust, may his nose be rubbed in the dust, I may he be disgraced, may he be disgraced, may he be disgraced, the one who finds his parents at all it all each one of them or both

00:08:37--> 00:09:24

of them. And then that person doesn't enter gender, if they don't take advantage of the opportunity to enter gender through being good to their parents and looking after them when they're old. That person is prevented from gender and doesn't go to gender. Despite having one of their parents or both of their parents reach old age. This is an indication that that person is up low LED is a disobedient person towards their parents, because they didn't enter gender, even though they had this huge badman apob agenda, this huge gate from the gates of paradise. And there are narrations which indicate that it is the middle of the gates of Paradise that the parents are a huge

00:09:25--> 00:09:41

is are a huge gate from the gates of paradise for a person to enter into. And if a person has a parent reaches all age, and then they don't enter Gen. Now what does that say about the way that they behave towards their parents and this is not the only Hadees which contains a severe warning

00:09:43--> 00:09:59

against disobeying the parents or against making the parents unhappy and we're going to come to more falls later on. We'll come now to a Heidi Thorpe Abdullah bin amor opener are sort of the love and humor that he said up Bella Rajan in a Navy solo while he was selama for cod obey rules.

00:10:00--> 00:10:02

Aloha jurati well Jihad

00:10:03--> 00:10:06

Abbot le agile Rahman Allah

00:10:07--> 00:10:12

call for help me in word he deca, I had one hate

00:10:14--> 00:10:29

this man he came to the Prophet size 11 He said, I would like to pledge my allegiance to you, that I will perform Hitler and Jihad and I want the reward from Allah. The Prophet sighs lm said, Are any of your two parents still alive?

00:10:30--> 00:10:53

Any of your parents still alive, pylon and Bell? keela whom he said yes, rather both of them are still alive. The Prophet sighs him said for tebah tell the edger I mean Allah is it that you want the reward from Allah? Karla Nam he said yes, the prophets I haven't said follow God in our world he Deak for sin, sir better humor.

00:10:55--> 00:10:57

In another wording for fee Hema for Jade.

00:10:59--> 00:11:17

The prophet SAW Selim said or one of your parent or your parents alive, one of your parents alive, any of them? He said yes, both of them. The prophets eyes and said is it that you want the reward from Allah? The man said yes, the prophet system said Go back to your parents and be have good companionship with them.

00:11:18--> 00:11:57

And your server like we talked about the Asin sorbetto have excellence in the way that you behave towards him. In another narration for fee him fJ go and make Jihad for them. ie go and strive to attain their pleasure, strive not to upset them and work hard. And from this, there are two benefits that we want to take out or three. The first thing that we want to take out is the importance of better Wiley Dean, as we had mentioned earlier, in the sense that the Prophet size and preferred it over a Jihad will hedger, he preferred it over the Jihad and he preferred it over the Hydra.

00:11:58--> 00:12:43

The second point that we want to take is the prophets I said didn't ask if the parents are Muslim or non Muslim. He didn't say, Are any of your parents alive? Then he didn't say are they? Is that parent, Muslim? And character? Are they Muslim or a Muslim man? I'm Kapiolani are they two Muslims are two Catholic. We didn't ask that question the Prophet sighs. He said if you want their award from Allah go back and be good to them. And as we said in his statement for p EMF a jarhead, there is a delete and this is a point that if I believe if this was the only point we mentioned this episode, it would be sufficient to be of a benefit inshallah to Allah. And that is that looking

00:12:43--> 00:12:46

after your parents, and being good to them is a jihad.

00:12:47--> 00:13:30

It is a jihad, it's tough. I remember the word jihad in its offered in its original meaning. It means to strive, and to give the utmost effort. And it's used in that meaning sometimes, for example, Eliza gel said wotja, hit home big her den, cabbie Allah, and make jihad against them with the Quran, a great jihad. But the point here is that in this Hadith, the prophet sighs have described though looking after your parents as jihad, Fie, he Marfa Jade, go back and make Jihad with those two parents.

00:13:31--> 00:14:12

And not sapan Allah shows you how difficult it can be. It's not an easy, right? Some people think that Subhanallah like for example, some people look at the cell phone, and we're going to talk about how they were in the middle of it. Danish outline is subsequent episode. And they say that, well, you know, like, you know, their parents are probably really good. And you know, they don't have to deal with what we are ultimately dealing with your parents is hard. And doing bitter validation is hard and preferring your parents over the things you want. This man came he wanted to go and make jihad. He wanted to go for that. He wanted to make a job. And yet the prophet SAW Selim said, for

00:14:12--> 00:14:57

FEMA for Jade, go back and make Jihad go back and meet you had with those two parents of yours. So it's not an easy matter. It requires determination and hard work. to prefer them over your preferences is not an easy thing. It's not easy at all, to give them preference over you to give them preference over your family members and again, without excluding the rights of others, but to give them preference over you is not an easy thing for a person to do especially in our time. We know that we are living in a time of local holiday, and the prophet SAW Selim said that from the signs of the hour and tele del amor to rob better, that the in the hadith of Jubilee in Sahih Muslim

00:14:57--> 00:14:59

that the slave

00:15:00--> 00:15:16

girl will give birth to her mistress. One of the strongest opinions in the explanation of this statement, and telling the amateur or better is that it means that the the mother gives birth to a daughter who treats her mother like a slave.

00:15:17--> 00:15:25

And that it refers to a little Cuckoo Cuckoo led pin pad to your parents. And we're living in that time we're living in that time, maybe the time will get worse.

00:15:26--> 00:15:59

But we're living in a time where it is a colleague colleague, is from the very rare things that you see somebody who does better do it. In the sense that the profit sizing described for fee hermaphrodite, it's not an easy thing for a person to do. It requires great, great difficulty for you to really fulfill better quality and that's why you know, the other in the cell Allah. Hi, Claudia, and I know satellite agenda, that the the the thing that aligns our agenda is selling to you

00:16:00--> 00:16:32

is gender and it's expensive. Gender is not an easy thing to get there, you just get the most valuable thing. The most, the the thing that allows you a century is hollier. It's valuable, and it's valuable in means it's not cheap, it doesn't come cheaply. And if the parents are one of the major gates into the gift from the gates of Paradise, then ultimately you have to realize that it requires some work to get to that level. We know that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that no one who is disobedient to their parents will enter gender.

00:16:33--> 00:16:36

No one who is disobedient to their parents will enter gender.

00:16:37--> 00:16:53

And we know that our caucus we talked about in the first episode where the definition is the opposite of Albert. So anyone who falls short in their bill towards their parents and their son towards their parents, this is our This is a person who is disobedient to their parents

00:16:54--> 00:17:04

and the prophets it said they will not intergender ie they will not enter Jenna with the people who enter it to hulan Aquarian and they enter into it

00:17:05--> 00:17:17

in the first instance, whether they will receive a punishment that will that will prevent them from entering gender with the people who enter gender immediately.

00:17:18--> 00:17:59

And as for them remaining in the fire forever then no Muslim who is a person of tawheed and who brings the minimum requirements to remain a Muslim they will not remain in the fire forever. So when we the Prophet size and said that they will not enter generate doesn't mean they will never ever, ever enter gender Abbottabad but what it means is that they will not enter gender when the people enter gender and they will be held back in punishment will ever belong. We seek Allah's refuge from that because they were bad to their parents. And a person might ask well what about the disbeliever? How do we what about if our parents are not a Muslim? And we know that our lies which are told us in

00:18:00--> 00:18:47

in sort of look, man, we're in Johor Dhaka, Allah and to shikibu maricela cabbie here in federal territory, Omar Warsaw Hippo Murphy Dunia meroofer and if they compel you to make a partner with me and that which you have no knowledge of, do not obey them and accompany them. It was our hibben that have you have companionship with them? meroofer in a good way. And this is further explained in the high resolve as merb Avi Becker Cydia karate Allahu and Houma and now call it Kadima, la yo me, we're here, Michigan. She said, my mother came to me, she came, she came to visit me. And she was emotionally she was a an idol worship of VR, it also lies all lies between the time of the Prophet

00:18:47--> 00:19:35

sallallahu alayhi wa sallam festivity to Rasul Allah, Allah what he said. She said, I asked the prophets I said, What should I do? Cool to cardi met la yo me, we're here, Aurora, Reba. My mother has come to me. And she is a raw labor in some of the narrations that mentioned raw Hema and she's she's obstinate against, against becoming Muslim, but rather by this is the majority of the narrations that Allah knows best that she desires. From me something she wants something from me any In other words, she wants a filler. She wants good companionship. She wants me to, you know, do the things that our daughter should do for her mother. She wants me to look after her take care of her.

00:19:35--> 00:19:59

She wants me to give her or to spend on her. She wants me to speak nicely to her and it's narrated in this, that asthma kept her mother waiting. She didn't let her mother come in, out of a fear that she would be from those people who made who had a companionship with the nonsense. That's why she was so scared that she didn't want to be from the people.

00:20:00--> 00:20:01

that showed

00:20:03--> 00:20:55

close allegiance to the, to the non Muslims and the IRA, which came regarding that. So she kept her mother she didn't she didn't accept her mother's wish for her mother to, you know, to vote to sort of behave with her like a daughter to a mother until she went to the Messenger of Allah. So I said, she said, My mother has come and she's rather. And she is She wants me to she's not a Muslim. She she's a polytheist. And she wants me to look after her. She wants me to keep ties with her. After acetal on me, should I keep ties with my mother, Carla and Ann city on the profit side, some said yes. Keep the ties with your mother. He said yes. Keep the ties with your mother. And so Paula that

00:20:55--> 00:21:15

was in a situation where her mother was in some of the narrations. It mentioned that her mother was firm upon her check upon making a partner with a light switch. It was stern upon it, but still wanted the rights of a mother. She said Should I give my mother those rights? Should I look at Should I keep the ties with my mother? I thought I said oh me.

00:21:16--> 00:21:40

Carlin, silly or MC said yes. Keep those ties with with your mother. Now someone might ask the question about asthma being the sister of a shadow of your loved one. How did how did that work? Because as soon as she went to Russia, she told Ayesha to ask the Prophet size. About the question or she? She asked Ayesha to to find the Prophet salallahu ITSM. So she could ask the question.

00:21:41--> 00:21:45

Here we have to understand that I smashed she was the half sister of

00:21:46--> 00:22:28

the mother was different. But the father was the same as her father was Abu Bakar and Artesia, her father was Abu Bakar. But the two mothers were different. They were half sisters. And that's why this Heidi here that her mother came when she was when she was when she got the mother of Arusha accepted Islam before that, roseola. And how about how about the love? Mm hmm. So the next topic that we have to deal with is the topic of obedience to the parent. And this is quite a big topic, and it has many different aspects to it. So I'm going to actually stop the the episode here in Charlotte. we'll resume Next time we will talk about title validate. And we talked about the fact

00:22:28--> 00:23:11

that the word bill, in linguistically refers to a tar refers to obedience. So there's no doubt obedience to the parents is a major major part of Biddle writing. But here, we need to understand where are the limits? And what happens when they ask us to do things that, for example might be harmful to us? Or things that might be harm or things that may not be harm, but might be difficult for us to do? Where are the limits? And where do we draw the line of where do we understand the guidance of Islam as it relates to be obedient to our parents? That's coming up in the next episode and Eliza jumbles best wa Salatu was Salam. ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa, Salaam

00:23:11--> 00:23:20

Alaikum. If you're enjoying these videos, and you'd like to keep up to date with all of the courses we're going to be running, make sure you head over to a [email protected]