Taimiyyah Zubair – Taleem al Quran 2012 – P04 054E Tafsir Al-Nisa 5-6

Taimiyyah Zubair
AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the importance of wealth management and avoiding wasting it. They stress the need for personal development and guidance, training and learning for life, and acceptance of women in relationships. The speakers emphasize the importance of avoiding wasting money and not cooperating with anyone, and stress the need for training and learning for life. They also emphasize the importance of showing love to someone even if it is not a person who is already present.
AI: Transcript ©
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Then Allah says, Well, I'd have to suffer her um, while I come and do not give to the foolish your wealth, a super high floor enough Sufi, who is Sufi? Someone who is foolish, someone who is weak minded, and there could be different reasons behind that. One is that a person is a very young age, right? For example, if there's a three year old, and you put a gold bangle on her, right, then Is she going to value it?

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No, she might be able to take it off. And she might say, Oh, wow. And then she forgets it somewhere. This is who a Sufi, right? Because her age makes her weak minded. It's not just the age that makes the person weak minded, but also the level of their maturity and understanding. Because the person might be quite old, they could be in their 20s, they could be in their 30s. But they're still not mature enough. A person might be in their 20s 30s, but they might not be mature enough. Like, for example, a man maybe even 35 years of age, but he's still not ready to be married. He doesn't have that seriousness, that sense of responsibility. Or a girl may be 30 years old, but she's not

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suitable for marriage. Because if she gets married, she's going to sleep all day. And she's going to be up all night watching television and the time that she's awake, she's going to be on the telephone or she's going to be on her Facebook. If she's asked to cook, she's gonna say what I don't know how to cook. How come you never learned how to build houses and you expect me to cook?

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So Is she ready for marriage? No, she's not. Okay. So Sophie, a person could be Sofia, because of various reasons why it was a person may be old, they may have some kind of understanding. They may be very good in math in physics. But when it comes to dealing with people, when it comes to managing their money when it comes to being responsible for their possessions, they are clueless.

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Where's your phone? I don't know. I think I left it at work.

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You know what happened to the car? I think somebody bumped? What happened here? I don't know. Can you help me with this match on Yeah, of course this is this is they're very good at it. But when it comes to, you know, being smart, they don't have that sense. They lack it. So Allah says that do not give to the super hair. What? Um, well, a comb your wealth, what is your wealth, your wealth, it could be yours. And it could also be theirs. But you are responsible over this is why it's called your wealth. For example, an orphan 10 years old kid owns an orchard. If he's told this garden is yours. And you have the right to decide whatever you want to do with it, son, you know, it's yours

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do whatever a man comes to him and he says he wants his $100 money.

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You know, you can buy lots of candy with it. You can buy this car with it, you can buy this toy with it. So why don't you take this money in here? Just put your you know, name over here. You know how to write your name, write it over here and give me this garden? What are you going to do with it?

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So should you give them their property? To manage themselves? No. You should not let her to suffer her unwelcome. Why? Why should you not do that? Because wealth is something valuable. Money is not cheap. It's money. Okay, money doesn't grow from trees. All right, it's hard earned. And it's very important. Allah says Allah Dijon Allah will come pm and that money which Allah has made for you, pm and pm como como PM, what does that mean to stand? So it's a means of standing for you. Meaning money is that on which Life stands on? Meaning life depends on money. If you don't have money, you can't live. If you don't have money, you can't eat. You can't dress yourself. You don't have a place

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to live. You can't get yourself an education. You can't even get a job if you don't have any money. Because how are you going to write your resume? How are you going to print it? How are you going to dress up for work? What address are you going to give? You can't and we see that money is something that is very important to people with regards their worldly matters as well as their religious matters. If you don't have money, can you eat properly look after your health so that you can worship Allah subhanaw taala No, if you don't have money, can you pay for an Islamic education and Islamic degree you cannot? If you don't have money, can you go for Hajj can you go for Allah in the

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case where you're not able to fast can you give the video you can't do anything right? So money allottee John hola hola como TM and it is very important. So when it is important value

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and take care of it and don't give it to those who will waste it. Because when you will give it to them, they will waste it and at the end, they will be left with nothing and you will be left with nothing, then how will you survive? But this does not mean that keep all the money to yourself, and that person may be hungry or they need money for their education or whatever, but you say no, I cannot give you any money you wasted. I buy you clothes, you rip them, I buy you toys and you destroy them. I buy you jewelry and you lose it about your phone and you do this to it. Nothing for you know, Allah says what zuccon Fear. Provide them have it, meaning fulfill their needs with it.

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Don't give the money in their hand. Don't leave the property at their disposal, but you make the financial decisions for them, and you will fulfill their needs, from their money, or from the money that you own.

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Walk zoom, walk someone from Kiswa cap scene while clothed them, whether it is their clothing or their shoes, or their bedding, whatever what zoom will kulula Whom cola Merrill HuFa and say to them a decent word, words of appropriate kindness, what is hola my rufa Maroof acceptable? Meaning even though their stupidity may annoy you still when you talk to them talk to them decently. Because there could be some people who are very foolish in the sense that whenever they talk whenever they discuss something, you know, for example, there could be no sometimes like, their kids are like, You know what, I'm gonna get this much money and I'm gonna go buy an iPod and I'm gonna go buy this

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case. And then I'm gonna buy this plan, and I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna buy this video game, and that video game. And there's, you know, building a huge castle on a castle. You know, they're daydreaming, basically. And when they're talking about these things, you get so annoyed, like, What are you talking about?

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Quiet? Stop talking this nonsense. But Allah says kulula Honkala Margaretha.

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Say to them appropriate words. And when they come and demand from you, why did you take my money? It belongs to me. And this is my right and you have no right over it. Give it back to me. Then again, say to them appropriate words. Let me give you an example. It'll be easier for you to understand.

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If there's a young girl

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and it's easy, she gets lots of money from her uncles and aunts. Okay. Then she's got $500 in her, for example. And then she is telling her friends or whatever, and her mom hears or I got $500 and read. I'm gonna go get a haircut from the salon that costs $100. Right? And then I'm gonna go buy those shoes. You know that $60 And then I really, really want that bag. And I know it cost $300 But I'm gonna go get it. Or she says, I'm gonna go to Claire's and I'm gonna buy all this jewelry.

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You know what I'm talking about, right? I'm gonna go to this store and I'm gonna buy this and I'm gonna buy this. I'm gonna buy this. And the mom's like, what is she talking about?

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She needs extra math help. She's failing in her high school, her math. So we need the money rather she needs the money to pay for her tutions to pay for extra classes. It goes $250 a month you know we should be using this money for something else. She goes and where that money is kept she takes it.

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And the daughter is throwing a tantrum. Why did you take money? You will see if you this you that this belongs to me. It's not yours. So the mother is really annoyed, especially if the daughter is talking to her like that. What does Allah say? Call him call him. Say to them appropriate words. Don't say to her. You're gonna go buy waste all this money on junk. And you're gonna buy those shoes. I just bought your shoes last week. What did you do with them? See the strap is broken already. And I bought you that purse. Look at it. Look at it. It was so expensive. And look what you've done with this purse. And where's that necklace that about you? And where's that earrings

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that I got you? And where are those clothes you don't even know how to do your laundry properly. Look what you stain the clothes and you ruined them. You put that sweater in the dryer. It's not supposed to win. And the whole list goes on and on and on.

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Allah says kulula home co tomorrow. I just know that she doesn't have that sense with age she will get better. But don't let her waste the money because that money can be used for something that's better. But it doesn't mean that once you have that money, you spend it on groceries. No. spend it on her because it is hers. Yes.

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Again, if a person is taking charge over someone whom he is Guardian off, by the way, you can't just take anyone

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As money, you see that your sister is being foolish with your money. So you keep it like, I'm not gonna give it to you because you're not her guardian, okay? You can only keep the money of the one who is under you whom you are responsible for. So for example, your son, your daughter, your wife, all right, and where they are not wise with money, you don't let them make financial decisions. Because if you give them that authority, they're going to waste the money. So you will take those rights away from them, but you will not deprive them completely. Allah says, What is the goon fee her work, sue him and clothe them fulfill their needs, provide them? Okay? Like, for example, if a

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husband feels that his wife wastes a lot of money, that every month he puts $500 in her account, and by the end, zero left, happens with some people, right, zero left, and where did the money go? Oh, you know, I bought that dress, but don't really like it. So I'm not going to wear it. Many women do this, I bought those shoes, and I'm going to wear them at that party. And when they're going for the party, wear those shoes, or they're very uncomfortable, and decided not to wear them.

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So a woman goes on wasting money, or she goes on buying so much groceries and the food isn't sitting in the refrigerator by the end of the week, everything goes in the garbage. She's wasting money, basically. Is it right? That the husband is working nine to five, five days a week, and the money that he brings, she throws she wastes like that. So in this case, if he takes away that right from her.

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Okay, just so that she can become more responsible over time, then does he have the right to do that? Yes, he can.

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The question is that if a woman's husband makes very poor financial decisions, can she do the same? When remember that a woman is not a guardian of her husband, where the husband is the guardian of his wife. Okay. But if a man is like that, he doesn't have that sense. And some men are like that, as soon as they'll get money, they'll go buy a new computer, they don't even need it, they'll go buy a new cell phone, they don't even need it. The house needs renovations. The paint is tripping off that children need, you know, extra classes, they need clothes, and there he is buying a phone here and buying a phone there. And he doesn't really need it. So in that case, she has to be more active,

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she has to be more aware. She has to participate more in the financial decisions. Okay? Like, for example, if the husband says, Okay, our house is fully paid off, I'm going to get a mortgage, I can get $50,000. So I can put it in stocks. And he has no idea but how the stocks work. He goes put 1000 mortgage gets $50,000 and puts it in stocks next day, he's lost all that money. So she should not agree with him in the sense that she should not go and sign those papers. She should not cooperate with him. All right, that if he says okay, sign over here, let's go to the lawyer do this. She should not cooperate with him because she knows that he is wasting money. All right, but since he is

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the guardian over her, she cannot say that I'm taking all the money from you. Because if she does, what is it going to lead to?

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That's another story completely. But if she does take the money, what is that going to lead to?

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Aggression, right? Husbands gonna get really mad, my money, you dare take it away from me? You dare take it away from me? Because men are physically stronger. Okay. Sometimes they are logical Mashallah. But they have their weaknesses as well. Right? A woman on the other hand, you know, she will remain quiet, you wait for some time, but a man he cannot get over it. Typically, not every man but typically this is what you see. So anyway, Allah says do not waste that money, that money is important. It is valuable. So don't let people wasted if somebody is wasting it. Take charge, but don't deprive them completely. Give them something, give them what they need. And when you get

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annoyed speak to them. Good things will listen to the recitation of these ayat and we'll move on

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for it. Oh boy banana.

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Che Munna

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oh honey.

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Marry, wala tu tu su

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while the tunnel yet Anna and test the orphans if the loo from Abdullah Balamb well

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which is if the law is to test and examine someone by exposing them to different situations.

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Okay, by exposing them to different situations. So for example, you want to test how good your ban is. Okay? So you put it on the stove, you put it in the oven. I mean, you use it there. You put it in the dishwasher, you wash it by hand, different things. And then you're like, Yeah, this isn't good pan. Right? So if Tila, expose them to different situations. Ibrahim Arneson, Allah subhanaw, taala. What ABB tele Ibrahim are boo when his Lord tested him how? By exposing them to different situations. He was tested through his father through his family through His Son through his wife, different ways he was tested. Right? So test the orphans. And by the way, when do you test someone?

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When does the test come? After the training? Correct? When does your juice test come after you have done your lessons. So what were the only uttama does them means that train the orphan, the orphan children, the boy and the girl, train each and every one of them as to how to deal with the financial responsibilities that have befallen them.

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Remember, that a child whose parents are alive, his situation is very different from a child whose father's not there.

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Okay, because a child whose parents are alive, when he has to make a financial decision, he doesn't need to worry, his father will do everything for him, we'll do the research for him. If he wants to buy a car, if he wants to buy a house, even whatever he will do, he will consult his father, and his father will help him guide him. Right? This is what happens typically, even if the Son is fully independent, still, the father is there to guide him. But an orphan child whose father is not there, he needs to be more aware, because very soon he will be making all these big decisions himself, he will have no one to fall back on. All right. So in their childhood, even Allah says, train them and

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keep testing them to see if they are able to manage their money, the property that they have inherited.

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All right, the property that they have inherited to keep training them, the boy and the girl, the girl is well why because if she has inherited a part of a garden, she better know the value of it, she better know what has to be done in order to take care of it because very soon she will be managing it. Even if she gets married, it belongs to her. Right? She wants to sell it, it's her she better know what it's worth. Like, for example, if there is a man who's got a business, a big business, and he's got a daughter,

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and he dies, who's inherited that whole thing, most of that thing. It's the daughter, yes, the other relatives will also have a share, but the doctor will have a big share of it. Right? Now, if the daughter has no idea about what accounting is, and what a business is, and what anything is, She better be trained, because she will have to make very big decisions, whether she wants to sell that business or she wants to make it grow. Because otherwise she will be cheated by others, right. So train the orphans, and train each in their own respective way. Like for example, if a girl is an orphan, she hasn't inherited much property, but eventually she's going to get married. Eventually

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she's going to have a family of her own. So she should be trained as to how to look after a family. Because you know, typically these things where do you learn them in a normal family? But if that family is not there, then that girl should be taught how to do different things. So what was going on yet? I'ma train them to stem hotter until either Bella or Nikka ha when they have reached a nigga, what is Nikka marriage meaning the age of marriage, so keep training them until they have reached marriageable age. What is marriageable age?

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What is marriageable age? At what age is a person able to get married? Yes. When you reach puberty, not necessarily. Yes. I mean, can you imagine a boy at the age of puberty I mean you think he's ready to have a wife and kids? Seriously don't think so? Yes 20 Some people are not ready to get married even at the age of 25.

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When a person is mature enough,

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which is why Allah says for in earnest a minimum rush then so if you perceive in them Anna stone from Hamza known seen once an Ursa is to perceive. So if you perceive IF YOU FIND IN THEM Rushton some sense, ability to decide

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have, you know to make sensible decisions. So they are mature enough to get married, they have some kind of sense to make the right kind of decisions. Okay, then you should give them their Well, I remember that marriageable age, it differs from culture to culture. It differs from family to family and a difference from individual to individual. Which is why you will see that in this country, the age for marriage than when a girl is legally allowed to get married is different from the legal age of getting married in other countries, isn't that correct? It is now different compared to what it was before. Why times have changed, circumstances have changed, people have changed. In a particular

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family, a girl may be ready to be married at the age of 15. Really, and she'll be happier if she's married at that age. And in another family and other culture and other society a girl is not ready to be married even at 25

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All right. So it varies from place to place culture to culture, individual to individual so for in Anna's the minimum Rushton if you find in them since then what should you do for the Pharaoh Elohim and one Pharaoh, Delphi in the fall, the Farah Illa, is to hand over, so hand over to them and while to whom their properties which properties that they own that they had inherited from their father.

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Because until that age, you were managing it because Allah says don't give to the foolish their money. So you did not give to the orphan the right to manage his own money. You kept it for him, you managed it for him, but now he's become of marriageable age, he is mature enough, you've trained him well. So what should you do hand over his wealth to him hand over her wealth to her, give her the rights give him the rights transfer the rights to them for the Federal ILA him and while but until that point that you hand over their wealth to them, Allah says, well as Kulu do not consume it consumed what the wealth of the orphan is. So often, when the dollar is soften, extravagantly,

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excessively, be down quickly, it's rough, more than the need, seen Rafa? Bidda bad and well, is to do something quickly before it's due time.

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So for example, the Prophet sallallahu Sallam he said lead to bad you're only the recovery was to God, don't go ahead of me in record Institute, meaning only do record when I go, only do sujood when I do it, meaning follow the Imam don't go ahead of him. So without us what quickly to try and do something before it's due time. Okay, so don't consume the wealth of the orphan while it's with you while you're in charge, excessively more than you need to, and be done on quickly Ayaka bottle that they will become big. So for example, The Guardian, he's looking after the wealth of the orphan. And he says, You know what, this kid when he grows up, he's going to ask for his money. So I quickly use

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it, I should really quickly use it up.

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Or it's often excessively more than the need. Because if a person is managing looking after the property of the orphan, let's say he inherited a business from his father.

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And the Guardian is looking after that business. Now, he is spending his time his effort. He's compromising on his work to manage the property of the orphan. Does he not deserve a wage? Does he not deserve a wage? He does? Does he not deserve something from that property? You know, as a fee for looking after? Yes. But if he says since I am managing the property that values $10,000, I'm going to charge him $500 every month.

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So if he is charging him that much money, within a few years, what's going to happen? The money of the orphan will be finished. Do you see what I mean? He says, you know, he's inherited this house. I'm looking after it. I'm maintaining it. So I'm going to charge him $1,000 Every month, and very soon, the house will belong to the Guardian, as opposed to the orphan because over a number of years, what property is the orphan going to be left with? So Allah says don't charge more than you need and don't consume quickly. We'll add that Kaluga is often will be done on a aquello out of the sphere. They'll become big.

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Then Allah says woman can have on a yen and whoever is rich by noon, yeah, he has enough meaning whoever guardian or guardian he has enough he's rich, he's wealthy, fully a starfish, then he should refrain from rain FIRFER or if

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But to refrain from something so he should refrain refrain from what keep away from what consuming the property of the orphan, meaning taking away edge for looking after charging a fee for looking after it, he should stay away. Allah has given him plenty of wealth. So why does he want $200? From the property with the orphan every month? I mean, he makes $2,200, what are those $200 gonna do to him not that much. So whoever has enough, he should refrain, woman CARAVACA urine and whoever is poor, he doesn't have money in the first place, he has very little. And on top of that, there's an orphan that he has to look after now, then failure called Bill Maher roof, then he should eat

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meaning he should take Bill Maher roof moderately, what is my roof, meaning he should charge a fees a wage that is decent, that is acceptable. All right. And my roof also means that he should take as a hockey takes not as a Richmond takes that a person says, you know, I am a hockey, I don't have that much. Okay. And since this orphan has come under my care, and he's brought all this money, and I'm looking after him, I'm looking after his property. So I'm going to take from him a lot every month, I'm going to charge him a lot. And then, you know, every day he's eating new things, and he's buying new clothes, and he's going here and going there. He's living the life of a rich person,

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whereas in reality, he was a poor person. So this is not modeled, my rule is that you charge according to your standard, your financial position, for either the Phantom, ilium and Wella. Home, then when the time comes, and you have handed over their wealth to them, for as you do or lay him, then call witnesses over them, as you do from each had to call witnesses, meaning to ask someone to come and bear witness, that when you're handing over the property to call people to witness that scene, that this property has been given to the orphan it has been handed over to him, Why call witnesses so that later on there are no disputes. Later on, there is no confusion. If the orphan

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comes in says later that my uncle, you know, this property belonged to me, and he never gave it to me. And the uncle actually did give it to him.

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The orphan is accusing him, people will think of the uncle so evil, but if he had called witnesses at that time, those witnesses will come up and they will say no, he did give him the property. So it's safer. So far as he do I let him work a fair bit, he has seen And sufficient is Allah as accountant, who is her see one who takes herself has seen, and what does that mean account.

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And this is very relevant, this name of Allah subhanaw taala is very relevant in this context. Because when a person is managing the property of someone else, he's managing a lot of accounts, right? This much money is charged this much fees and this much weight this percent and that percent. Now, a person is calculating all of this, but at the same time, who is calculating the deeds of that individual? Allah Subhana.

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Allah is watching you, because a lot of fraud happens. A lot of cheating happens, right? When it comes to calculations. For example, when it comes to calculating taxes, you know, people get away with the most ridiculous things the most ridiculous ways. So a person should remember, Allah is going to call me to account Allah knows this orphan doesn't know people don't know. But Allah knows waka Fabula, he has Eva. Now in the saya what do we learn, we learn about the obligation of training and testing orphans, preparing them for life, teaching them life skills. And this is not just something that orphans need, but there's something that every child needs.

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Ladies, aunties, mothers who are here, train your children for life. Life is tough, it is not easy. And daughters listen. Okay, those of you who are daughters, listen, when your mother is teaching you how to cook, how to clean, do it. When your mother is teaching you how to iron how to do laundry, how to look after the house, do it. Because the time will come when you will have to do this yourself. And if you don't know how to do it now, you will cry then. But your tears won't help you. No one will have mercy on you.

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Your hunger pangs will drive you to cook something. And if you don't know how to cook, you're going to make yourself sick, and you're going to make others sick. So please, life is difficult. Train yourself. And this is true for girls as well as for boys.

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Living in this country, living in any country. In fact, wherever you are, you have to be trained for life. Whatever responsibilities are coming over you so much attention is given to school career. Isn't that so? Why?

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because this is how you're going to make money. But if you have a good degree, if you scored really well, and you get married, and your husband says, I want food, and you say, look, I wasn't a student, I got distinction, I got this degree, that degree doesn't matter. He wants food, you need food, your children will need food.

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So there's some things about life that cannot be ignored. So it is an obligation to train orphans, which means that it's an obligation to train children, prepare them for life, teach them life skills, it's very, very necessary.

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And this I also teaches us about Allah subhanaw taala is justice towards the orphan, the how just and merciful Allah is that he has laid the responsibility on the Guardian that don't just, you know, let him live the orphan. Let me train him so that he can be a successful individual.

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He actually has a good chance of being successful in life, because otherwise he will be a failure. So children need to be prepared in different ways for life, not just their career, but also other aspects of life.

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Let's listen to the recitation Wallah to suit

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the John

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fina works

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Nikka have in

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is slow down on me, Bo? ORMAN woman cannot

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stop if woman can

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for either

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feeling more

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ashamed or are

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woke up?

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Alright, anything you'd like to share? Any question?

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Yeah, if a woman says My mother is that you take me for how much? You take me for a camera? And you say, Okay, sure. That's fine. If a woman says My mother is that you let me complete my degree, and you also pay for it.

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If he agrees, then okay. But if he doesn't, he says, No, I let you, I allow you, I'll support you. I'll drive you there. I'll watch the kids. But you have to pay for it yourself, then that's also possible because he's supporting her. He's allowing her because if he wants he can actually stop her. Right? If there's a genuine reason anyway. Anything else? Yes.

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Okay, so for example, the Mahal was decided in US dollars, right? That the husband says I'll give you 10,000 US dollars. Now at that time, the value of the US dollars was more.

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All right. And then he gives them a hug in the form of let's say Canadian dollars later on. But there's a difference in the value. All right. If she says okay, no big deal. barely going to be 1015 $20. Really? Who cares about it? I don't mind. That's okay. And if a person says I'll give you jewelry that is worth $2,000 or $10,000. Okay, so that's also fine. Okay, but remember that the value and the kind both should be known from before? It does. One should not say I'll give you $5,000 And later on, he gives her an old used diamond ring that his mother used to where it's worth $5,000 That's not what you told her. You told her you give her $5,000 And you're giving her an old

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used diamond ring. That's not fair. Do you give what you promised? Okay. Yes. Yeah, it can be a combination of tangible and intangible. Okay. It can be a combination of different kinds of tangible things. All right, can be in different forms.

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That's why it's

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They can buy their freedom, they can request for freedom. And if a slave wants to buy the freedom then the master should cooperate. In the Quran. We learn about that. That those who want their freedom then give them help.

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All right, yes.

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One of the logics that was presented in class for a man to have multiple wives was that let's say that the wife cannot have children and the man wants children. So he says, Okay, I'll marry another woman so that I can have children. Okay? But what if the man cannot have children? And his wife wants children says, can she go and marry another man, but she likes the first one.

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Now, this is logic, we're using logic over here, right? exact logic. Remember that in our deen you use logic, but we are human beings. We're not machines. All right. So along with logic, you have to use reason. And you also have to be practical. Okay. And we also have to remember that men and women are not identical.

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So what applies to a man does not apply to a woman. What applies to a woman does not apply to a man. This is something that we really need to understand. In our deen women are acknowledged and treated as women and men are acknowledged and treated as men. This is why the commands the rulings, the allowances that are given to women are suitable for them. And their commands, the allowances that are given to men are suitable for them. All right, for both genders, they're suitable. Now a person might say, you know, if a woman menstruate says she doesn't pray for a whole week. Now, this is not fair for a man, he should also get a break. So if he's working full time, and he's really tired, and

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it's summer, and he's got five kids, and you know, he's got a whole lot of work to do. So can you just take a break of two days? Well, the woman is getting a break for seven days, can you get a break for two days? You're using logic here, but it's not the same. Do you see what I mean? You cannot treat men and women in the exact same manner they are different. They are equal in the sense that like we learned earlier when it comes to the acceptance of acts of worship, when it comes to dua, Allah subhanaw taala accepts the dua of men and women regardless, okay, when they perform acts of worship, Allah accepts their deeds regardless of their gender, all right, but when it comes to

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the commands, the allowances they are different, that are suited to each gender. So, an allowance that is given to men is not given to a woman. And allowance that has been given to a woman is not given to the men. So if a woman is given the allowance, okay, go ahead and marry another husband, because your first husband cannot have children. If she does that, she will be in trouble, she will be in difficulty. She is going to live a very hard and difficult life. You know, for a man, it is possible to maintain a relationship with multiple women, it is possible for him because of his body, the way Allah subhanaw taala has made him but for a woman, it is not possible to maintain multiple

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relationships at a time. It is not possible.

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It is humanly impossible for a woman and she cannot be just unfair. And besides, the man is responsible for the woman, the woman is not responsible for the men, if you are getting a woman married to two husbands, and it's like she is responsible over them because she has to satisfy each of them. But she's not responsible. They are to be looking after her, not her looking after them. All right. So remember this rule. Men and women are not identical. Yes. The master is responsible for that child.

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I do not know about that. But what's the status of the children? I'll have to look into that more. But the man is responsible for the children even those that he has two slaves. Okay. No, they are His children. Okay, but I don't know about their social status. I'll have to look into that. I do not know. Yes.

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Sorry, I am not able to hear you.

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is good.

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Okay, the question is that if a man promises to the woman that I will give you this much money as your mug, and then he does not give it for several years, and it doesn't seem like he's gonna give it. So first of all, remember that he is sinful. Right? He is sinful for breaking his commitment for breaking his promise. And like I mentioned earlier, when he dies, if he dies during her lifetime, then before his estate is distributed, first and foremost, what will happen, her mod will be taken out and given to her and then later on, she will be given her share of inheritance. Now the other question is that over time, the value will increase, right? That at that time, the value of $1,000

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was different compared to the value of $1,000. Now before you could get a lot

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With that money, but now you can get not the same, right? But the thing is, as far as these things are concerned, like gold and silver and cash, they you cannot increase their value. Okay? You cannot increase their amount. Because this is just like a person may say, I'm giving a loan to someone, they're going to give it back to me, within 10 years, but after 10 years, the value will be different. This is why I'm going to charge them, I gave them 10,000, but I want them to give me 1200 back because 200, the value will increase over time, that 200 is what river it is River, it is considered interest. So you got to increase the amount, even though the value may have increased,

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right? All right, anything you'd like to share?

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The slaves are not accounted in the four wives

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nowadays, know when a person can't just go and make someone a slave. You can't do that. A slave will be there when slavery exists in a society. And it doesn't exist right now. At least that I know. I mean, here, it doesn't exist. So you can't just say that. Okay, you know, I'll make you my slave. You can't do that.

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Yes, go ahead. You know, the requirements are in between them, what what

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are your emotions, and your love, of course, our bill includes many things, it includes, you know, financially maintaining justice. Likewise, the house, the accommodations that are provided, in the time that a person spends with the family, you know, with one wife and the other the time should be equal to. And also remember that it should be in the love that a person shows, heart you cannot control. Okay, heart you cannot control. But even though you don't love someone like crazy, can you not say good things to them? You can? Can you not show love to them through your gestures through your talk through your physical contact, you can write, like the prophets on a lot of send them he

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loved it shut the door and have the most. But it doesn't mean that he did not spend time with other wives. No, he did. He also looked after them. He also showed love to them.

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All right.

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If a husband has decided to get married to another woman, and the wife is not happy with that decision, then can she walk out of that marriage. The thing is that don't just make decisions based on emotions. Right? Emotionally, you can't even accept on their wife, you cannot even think about having a co wife, your husband spending time with another person. The thought is disgusts you like you really can't accept it. But be a little logical here, walking away from that marriage, will life be easier and better than compared to living like this? No, if you don't have him 100%, at least 50%. Now, later on, if you leave him, you won't have him at all. And your children, they need the

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00:43:03 --> 00:43:09

Right. And in some ways, you feel that you may not need him, but in other ways you do need him.

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He doesn't need to take permission. Because if you were to take permission, and the wife did not allow, which would be the case in the majority of the situations, then what would happen, the first five would be divorced, or she would be killed. Or and this happens, by the way, there are countries where the law is that before doesn't married a second wife, he has to take permission from the first she's not allowing, he will go and kill her, he will have her killed, he will divorce her. And women suffer at the end. So Islamically he doesn't need to take permission, but definitely, he should tell her, he should make her willing to accept it somehow. Or he should acknowledge her feelings. He

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should look after her well being to be compassionate towards her being understanding towards her. Because many times it happens that men go ahead and marry a second wife and the first one has no idea.

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Yes, that happens that it's not a sin, first of all that he's committing. So it should not be considered like a sin. And we also please, let's not get shocked when we find out that so and so. Has a second wife

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accepted already Allah says it in the Quran. No matter how shocking and weird it is. It's a reality. So stop looking at it as a sin. It's not a sin.

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And realize that there was a reason why the person did it. It's his personal life. It's his decision. You don't need to interfere and say, but how does he manage both of them? And how can he be fair with them? You don't need to interfere in their personal life. And by the way, if they're happy for you, the Prophet sallallahu cinnamate so many wives and people say, you know, this is something that I don't understand. Why did he have nine wives?

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Really, if you think about it, if the Prophet sallallahu sallam was happy, it

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His wives were happy. Who are you to object? Really? What problem do you have? If I shall learn how to not have a problem? And you're having a problem doesn't make any difference? Okay, so let's accept it as a part of our deen. This is an allowance that has been given. And if people are unjust because of this allowance, that's again, their problem, it doesn't mean that the law is wrong. The people are wrong, just like you don't judge Islam by the actions of Muslims. You don't judge having multiple wives by the action of certain individuals.

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Okay, that if a woman is making the money, does she become the leader does she become the in charge as opposed to the husband?

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Okay, when we think about a dominant husband and a submissive wife, we think about a man sitting on the couch and ordering his wife getting me this, get me that and the wife is serving him here, Master here, Master here, this is not what it means. Inshallah, later on, we will learn about the role of men and the role of women in marriage. Okay, we will learn about it. What this means is that when there are two people, okay, who are living together, one has to be the leader, meaning one has to be the one who's making the final decision. Okay? It doesn't mean that he completely disregards the other, he will consult them, but the final decision is left to him. Why? So that there can be

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some kind of decisiveness, you know, so that everybody is on the same page. If you have a car that has been driven by two drivers, I'm sorry, there going to be too many accidents. Too many accidents, isn't that so you can't have two drivers, there has to be one driver, you may have a GPS to guide you, to help you. You may have someone telling you drive like this go like here do like this, but it doesn't mean that they have the control just like you have the controls because if that's going to happen, you're not going to get anywhere. This is a different topic which we will learn very, very soon into the necess. So let's keep it for that time. Your questions will be solved will be answered

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as we study these verses. Inshallah, if there's any question that is not answered, please go to my alHuda and send me the question. Okay. And I will try to answer that question within Pepsi so that everyone can benefit.

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So pentacle long will be handy gonna show you Allah ilaha illa Anta let's have a look. I wanted to be like a Santa Monica.

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