Stories from the Qur’an #11

Taimiyyah Zubair


Channel: Taimiyyah Zubair


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AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the importance of protecting oneself in a situation where the other person is protected, avoiding violence, and avoiding harms. They emphasize the need for strong protection and not letting anyone into one's own people's homes. The importance of avoiding violence and not giving up on one's behavior is emphasized, as it can lead to regret and anxiety. The speakers also stress the importance of self regulation for managing behavior and emotions, as it can lead to regret and anxiety and negative behavior.
AI: Transcript ©
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all along

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I said I'm on a coma Allahu wa Barakatu who

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are with bIllahi min ash shaytani R rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah Hill Karim rubbish Rocklea Saudi were silly Emery wahala rock data melissani of Kahu Kohli Allahumma you can be was said diddly Sani was slow Sufi Mata can be many herbal Alameen

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Ciao we'll continue with our study of the story of the two sons of Adam are the salam Hubbell and Kaabil Cain and Abel that is mentioned in Surah. Toma ADA.

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Allah subhanaw taala tells us what to do or lay him never have been a Adam I will help and recite to them the story of Adams two sons in truth. It called Robert O'Bannon for to cook below him in a hottie Hema when I'm you Taco Bell Meenal her when they both offered a sacrifice to Allah, and it was accepted from one of them, but was not accepted from the other Ornella kotula neck color in nama Yatta Kabul Allahu Minar, with the clean, set the latter, I will kill you set the former Indeed, Allah only accepts from the righteous who fear him.

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So far in the story of the two sons of Adam alayhis, salam, we have learned about how both the sons offered a sacrifice. And, and one of them His sacrifice was accepted. And the other one, his sacrifice was not accepted. The one who sacrifice was not accepted, became jealous, and became very angry. And, and this was Kaabil cane. And that jealousy led him to become very antagonistic towards his brother. And he basically threatened to kill him.

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Now we see that have ill able, in return advised him very gently, that if your sacrifice was not accepted, then that is not my fault. The problem is actually in you because in Nehemiah dockable, Allahu Milan with the clean, Allah only accepts from the righteous. So instead of being angry with me, and blaming me for your problems, some introspection is required over here. A lot of people make this mistake in their life, that when things don't go according to their wishes, according to their plan, instead of taking any sense of responsibility, and instead of doing any kind of introspection, they find someone to blame. They find someone to accuse, and then they insult them, they attack

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them. And they think that you know, they're the source of all evil. Whereas it this does not solve the problem at all. If you don't look into the mirror, and you don't acknowledge what needs to be fixed inside of you, then blaming other people and, you know, hurling abuses at them, and showing anger at them and taking revenge from them is not going to solve the problem.

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So we see over here that have been

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have been able, advised his brother very gently that in the Maya dockable Allahu Mignon with the cane, that Allah only accepts from those who are righteous. So you should be of those who are righteous and improve your intention and also the manner in which you offer sacrifice to Allah or xojo and he don't be angry at me. And then he said in verse number 28, we learn let him bursa la yada yada Lita, Catellani, ma Anna Baba Sita, yeah de la Cali Aqua Tullock in the a half a la hora Bella Alameen. He said if you should raise your hand against me

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to kill me, I shall not raise my hand against you to kill you. Indeed, I fear Allah, Lord of the Worlds. So here, Habib is basically reminding Kaabil of how brothers should be with one another. So he said that if you are going to reach out with your hand to kill me, I am not going to reach out with my hand towards you in order to kill you, because you are my brother, and a brother does not kill his own brother. I am not that person who will act in opposition to Allah's command, and commit such injustice against my own brother, I am not going to respond to your evil with another evil, I am not going to become like you in sin, and I am not going to even try to kill you, because killing

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you is unlawful on me and I am afraid of Allah in the Huff Allah Allah, Allah Allah mean, so I am not going to disobey Him. I am not going to do what you have intended to do. Rather, I will be patient in response and I will expect reward from Allah. So let's look at verse number 28. In more detail. Allah subhanaw taala tells us let in Bursa la yada yada Lita Kulani have been said, The one whose sacrifice was accepted at the one who was threatened with murder. He said in response, that if you extend your hand towards Me in order to kill me, man, I'm gonna be basically Yediot Giardia elaida, I am not going to extend my hand towards you the upper to luck in order to kill you. Here,

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he says that if you extend your hand to kill me, I am not going to extend my hand to kill you. Versus polio. Extend one's hand, it basically means to reach out with one's hand towards something or towards someone. So to extend one's hand towards another, why in order to assault them, in order to slap them in order to hit them in order to punch them. All right, in order to intentionally inflict some kind of harm on them. This is what busboy yard is. And here, what is meant is that if you are going to initiate the attack, if you're going to be the first one to attack me in order to kill me, and he if out of your jealousy and rage, you are going to try to kill me, I am not going to

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be the first to attack you and to try to kill you. No, I am not going to be the first one to do that. Imagine if you find out someone is planning to attack you. What would you do? You would want to attack them before they're able to attack you right. So how built so Harvey able says over here that he is not going to do that.

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Now, this does not mean that I am not going to defend myself I know what it means is that I will not initiate I Will not I will not be the first to assault. Okay. So Habil is negating initiating the attack not self defense. Okay, so Matt Anna, we basically yeah, de la Cali aka Tula Subhan Allah, this is so powerful, and he forgot about a physical altercation. Sometimes in an argument, even if someone says to us something that is upsetting, that is hurtful, that is annoying, that is untrue, that is accusatory what happens we become so angry, and we we become more harsh at times or, you know, we want to come across in a very strong and powerful way. So that you know, they're not able

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to say anything more, you need the idea over here is that sometimes we want to respond or or initiate a conversation so strongly so harshly that we basically want to you know, destroy the other person so that they have no courage, no guts to you know, say anything to us. But look at her bill, he says that I am not going to initiate the attack. I am not going to be the first one to attack you. Okay. Now Kaabil had said very emphatically very strongly, awkward to learn that I am surely definitely by Allah, I am going to kill you. And have been able alto response very emphatically let in by Sirpa Illa Yoda, that surely by Allah, if you extend your hand towards Me in order to kill me,

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if you initiate the attack by Allah, I am not going to be the one to initiate it.

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I am not going to be the first one to strike here you can be the first one, I am not going to be the first one to strike look at the difference between their words between the way in which they speak. One is saying I am going to kill you and the other say, I am not going to reach out with my hand in order to kill you. I am not going to do that.

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And this is because he is lucky he is someone who fears Allah. So, yes Taqwa is how Hoonah it is in the heart. But remember when something is in the heart, it is visible, it on the limbs, okay, it impacts the limbs. So, we can see over here that because her bill truly feared Allah, what happened, that fear of Allah was visible in his behavior in his speech, so, he says, I am not even going to initiate the attack, I am not going to be the first to strike he is so careful in the way that he talks.

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Now, there is another interpretation of this Some say that have been meant that he was not going to even defend himself

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okay. Any if you extend your hand in order to assault me, I am not going to extend my hand in order to assault you meaning I am not going to attack in response, I am not going to fight back. Okay, Abdullah bin aroma of the Longhorn who said that out of the two brothers, the one who was killed, was actually stronger. But he did not extend his hand because he wanted to avoid sin at all costs.

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And which I had explained that this was in the Sharia of Adam Alayhis Salam, that the one under attack should not fight back. And instead he should be patient and expect reward from Allah. But remember that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam commanded us that the one under attack should not surrender himself to the attacker.

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Meaning he should fight back he should defend himself. So for example, if someone

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you know tries to snatch away your bag, okay, you're not just going to let them take it away. No, you're gonna fight back. You're going to hold it tight. And if you can you you can even strike the other person with your bag or kick them or something like that. This is something that the prophets of Allah who are using them told us to do that do not that basically we should not surrender ourselves to the one who has been violent towards us. We have to defend ourselves. We should fight back. And we learn in a hadith that if a person is killed, while they are defending themselves, then they are a martyr. So in a hadith we learn this hadith is in Sudan Aveda with the Prophet sallallahu

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alayhi wa sallam said that he who is killed while protecting his property is a martyr. And he who was killed while defending his family, or his blood, or his religion is a martyr patients does not mean that someone is attacking you and you're just taking the beating. No, you have to defend yourself. You have to fight back. You cannot just surrender yourself to someone who is being violent. Because if you don't, then what's going to happen today they're assaulting you tomorrow they will assault someone else and someone else and someone else you have to fight them back in order to make them realize that this is not how you should live, this is not how things are done,

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this is not okay.

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And defending oneself in such a situation means that one should try to

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overcome the other, okay and basically pin them down without attempting to kill them without the intention to kill them. Any the intention should be to fight back. Okay, in order to chase away the attacker, in order to pin them down or in order to safely get away. The intention should not be to kill the attacker. Okay, the intention should be to disarm the attacker, tie his hands, things like that, but not to kill him. But if the attacker is not leaving him, and the only way to defend oneself is to kill the attacker, then the ruler must say it is permissible to do that and there is no blood money over there. It is permissible to hit back. Okay to strike. You know to kick right to,

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for example bite or do something I for example, if someone is you know, holding your hand, okay, violently they're not letting you go. Can you bite their arm or their hands so that they let you go? Yes you can. You have your keys in your hand. Can you strike

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victim in such a way that you know, they let you go yes. Use a sharp object in self defense in order to chase the attacker away. Yes, that is permissible.

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So, first of all the intention should not be to kill but if it ends up happening that the only way to get the attacker away or to save yourself from the attacker is to, you know, do something very strong that that ends up killing the attacker, then you're not at fault. May Allah subhanaw taala protect you. We learn in a in a hadith that a person came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and said O Messenger of Allah. What do you think? If a man comes to me in order to steal my possession? Any What should I do? If someone comes to me in order to steal my property? Take it away from me. What should I do? The Prophet sallallahu sallam said, do not surrender your property to

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The man said what if he fights me? The prophets of Allah who has said, then fight him.

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The man said, What do you think if I am killed? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said then you will be a martyr. The man said what do you think of him if I kill him?

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Any if you're telling me that I should fight him back and in the process? If I am killed, I'm a martyr. What if I end up killing him? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said he would be in the fire.

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So the one who strikes the other in order to defend himself in order to respond to you know physical violence in order to protect oneself from further attack, then such a person is not guilty of sin. There is another Hadith in Sahih Hadith in which we learned that a man bit another man's hand

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okay, what's happening a man bit under another man's hand. So the man whose hand was being bet, of course, pulled out his hand by force.

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And when he did that, the man who was biting him, his two teeth fell out.

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Okay. So they brought their kids with the prophets of Allah who are who sent him because any

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any for their sauce, right? Any for a tooth for tooth. So, the one whose teeth fell out came and said that, you know, my teeth falling out because this man pulled his hand out of my mouth while I was biting him. So the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam said, You bit his brother is are you bit your brother? Like a camel bites? Go away. There is no deer for you. And he there's no Casals over here, there's no revenge over here, because you were biting him like a camel bites. So what did you expect him to do continue to be bit or protect himself. And of course, if he's going to protect himself, he's going to pull out his hand and if he pulls out his hand, and your teeth come out the fault is

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not his the fault is yours. Why were you biting him in the first place? You're the aggressor over here. He was only defending himself.

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But remember that in a time of tribulation in a time of fitna,

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it is permissible to not fight back. Why, in order to avoid further violence, like or as Manuel de la Horne who did? Okay, when the rebels had basically come and surrounded his house, and they were becoming violent, increasingly violent by the day, and the Companions, any the people around Earth Manuel de la noir and who they wanted to fight those rebels and punish them with one or the other more and who said no, let them be. And eventually, there came a point when those rebels basically entered into the house of Earth Manuel de la Mourinho and killed him.

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Why did Earth Manuel the Allahu Anhu not fight back over here? Because if he fought back, what would happen? All these rebels who would come into Medina, all right.

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In this would end up causing a war inside of Medina, within the city of Medina, there would be so much bloodshed, no one would be safe in their homes. So Earth man or the Longhorn, who did not want such violence within the city of the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam

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but in a time of peace in a time of security, okay, fighting back is necessary in a time of fitna, okay, when one should not fight back, but in a time of security and peace, one should fight back. So basically in different situations, the ruling is different. We learn in a hadith about how Abu Musa al Arshi

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Lila Morton, who reported that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned to him mentioned regarding, you know, the different tribulations that will happen before the Day of Judgment. Okay. And he explained it in great detail. And he mentioned that at such at such a time, a person should basically break their bowl in either bow and arrow, cut the strings and strike their sword against the rocks, meaning break their swords. Right? Why? So that end, they should not partake in any kind of physical violence whatsoever.

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And he said that if anyone enters upon one of you, and you're not going out to fight people, you are you have broken your weapons and you're just sitting at home, you're minding your own business, okay? Then, if someone enters upon any one of you, let him be like the better of the two sons of Adam, the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, let him be the better of the two sons of Adam or his salah, meaning he should not fight back. And if he gets killed, then let him be killed because in a time of fitna, this is what should be done don't add to the violence, violence is only to be used in order to stop further violence. But if the use of violence is going to perpetuate and increase

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violence, then violence should not be used over there.

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So here,

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sorry, here have been able, he said that I am not going to strike you, I am not going to try to kill you. Because it needs a half Allahu Akbar Al Amin, indeed, I fear Allah, the Lord of the Worlds. This is very important. We learn over here the reason behind why had been said that he was not going to strike his brother, he was not going to try to kill him.

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He's making it clear that I am going to refrain from fighting back not because I'm afraid of you. Or not because I am unable to fight. Not because I am weak. No, I choose non violence nonviolence, ye out of the fear of Allah in the a half Allahu Akbar, Allah al Amin. And isn't this real strength? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us that

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the strong person is who the one who can control his anger.

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Right? So have you as we learned from the narration of intermodal, de la Mourinho, he was actually the stronger brother. He was actually the one who was more physically capable. Okay, if he were to fight, he would easily be able to kill Kobe. If he were to hit back, it wouldn't be difficult for him to kill copied. But he chose not to, not out of weakness or fear or inability. But because of the fear of Allah in the a half Allah horrible al Amin, and this shows us that her bill was not just physically strong. He was also emotionally very strong, that he was able to control his emotions.

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And when he said, Man, I'm gonna be bossy to yeah de la Cali, aka Turlock, he made it clear to his brother why he would not fight back. Write that in the Hof Allah rabbil aalameen, that this is not cowardice or weakness, but the fear of Allah, that I do not want to end up committing murder that Allah has forbidden.

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And in the statement was also a reminder to his brother, that even though I am able to fight back, I am not going to fight back. I am not going to try to kill you because I fear Allah.

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So he's indirectly reminding his brother, that you should also fear Allah.

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You should also fear Allah. And he says in the UK of Allah, Rob Bella Alameen he says Allah, the Lord of the worlds

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and if Allah is the Lord of the Worlds, that means that you cannot escape Allah. So think about what you're doing. You might act on your anger and jealousy, and you know, feel momentarily satisfied. But can you escape Allah, the Lord of the Worlds, you cannot? You cannot escape the consequences then

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in the a half Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah mean, and this is such a powerful statement. You see, each one of us ends up in a situation where we feel angry, where we feel really big emotions inside of us.

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And we want to act on impulse. Right? So in a situation like that, say such statements that help you control yourself, help you regulate not only your emotions but also your behavior. Seek refuge with Allah. Say things like I fear Allah. In the a half Allah, Allah, Allah Allah mean, right when use of early husana When he was invited to commit sin, what did he say? Mara de La Mara de la I seek refuge with Allah in the Hora be accented with why in the hula, you flee her Lolly moon, my Lord has given me an excellent place of stay, and the wrongdoers do not succeed. Any if I commit the sin, that I would be a wrongdoer and I would never be successful, I seek refuge with Allah and the one who

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leaves a sin out of the fear of Allah. Not because they were unable to do it, not because they were too weak to do it, they were too chicken to do it. No, they literally left it out of the fear of Allah alone. And he they had the ability to do with the opportunity to do with the strength to do it. They could commit the sin very easily. But they stayed away. They chose to stay away out of the fear of Allah. And this is something that Allah subhanaw taala loves. And this is something that Allah subhanaw taala will greatly honor

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on the day of judgment, because we learn that one of the seven types of people under the shade of Allah, on the Day of Judgment, will be the person who was invited to commit Zina. Right. And he rejected that invitation, saying in the a half Allah, I fear Allah.

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Any it's, it's only the fear of Allah because of which this person stayed away from sin. Any many people, they don't commit sin. Why? Because in a particular sin, why? Because they never have the opportunity. Okay, or they they're afraid of people. Right? This person leaves a sin stays away from a sin, out of the fear of Allah. That's the only thing that prevents them from committing the sin. And this is something very, very powerful, truly admirable. And it shows the strength of one's character, their integrity, their faith.

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So, when a person stays away from committing a sin,

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especially after having the opportunity to commit the sin, even having the urge or the thought, the intention to commit the sin, but the choose to leave it, then what happens, the angel is the angel who was recording our deeds is actually instructed to write a good deed.

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A good deed because the person intended to commit a sin was able to, but chose not to, decided to leave the sin not committed. So then a good deed is recorded for that person.

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Now, there's a number of lessons that we can take from this idea, right, first of all, we see in this ayah how

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people vary in their nature, in their, in their demeanor, in their thinking in their character. Right. In their disposition. We see that

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RBL Kane is so impulsive, right? He's jealous, is angry is out of control. He is blaming his brother, instead of looking inward, he is accusing his brother and he's coming full force to learn Nick, I am going to kill you. Right? And he doesn't care about the fact that you know, it's his own brother. He doesn't care about the fact that it's not his brother's fault. Any he's so out of control,

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and in contrast, have been able is so composed, so calm.

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He in response to Kabhi Kabhi says in Neil Aquila, Nick, I'm going to kill you imagine if someone says to you, I want to kill you. What are you going to do? And they say, How dare you?

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How dare you. You need before they can do anything. We would assault them we would strike them. We would say something to them in order to chase them away any or in order to show them that, you know we're stronger. So hubiera is so composed, so deliberate and he has so much self regulation.

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And his he from his speech. It is very clear that his goal is to somehow prevent his brother from committing murder.

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Right? Any he wants to save himself and also his brother from sin.

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He wants to solve the problem over here. Some people don't like to solve the problem. They just like to continuously fuel the fire. They they want to have the last word always that no matter what someone says, they have to say something in order to have the last word.

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So this perpetuates and and increases the argument, the altercation. It doesn't lead us anywhere. Right? It doesn't solve the problem have been so focused on solving the problem over here, and he's so peaceful. He's so calm. So people vary in their behaviors.

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Okay, not everyone you meet is going to be the same as you know, as, as another person that you've always dealt with. People are different in their nature in their mannerisms.

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However, not all people are the same in their rank in the sight of Allah. Right? The one whose character is good, has a higher position near Allah, the One who is more calm and composed and peaceful and focused on soil. Right, their rank is going to be higher near Allah. We learn in a hadith the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to some people, shall I not inform you of the best of you from the worst of you?

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Shall I not tell you about who the best among you is? And who the worst among us? The people said

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in the people were silent. Okay, so the prophets that Allah who are listening, repeated the question three times. And then a man said, of course, a messenger of Allah, please tell us about the best of us from the worst of us. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said the best of you is the one whose goodness is hoped for

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the best of you is the one who as soon as you know they come somewhere, people expect that they will get something good from them.

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Okay, goodness is hoped for. And he his his goodness is hoped for people are happy to see him. People are happy with their president with his presence. Why? Because they know that now they're going to benefit, this person is going to bring some kind of relief, some kind of benefit. And people are saved from his evil. And the worst of you is he whose goodness is not hoped for, and people are not saved from his evil, meaning the moment this person enters, people become agitated, they become nervous, they become anxious, that Oh, there she is here now. And now she's going to say something hurtful, she's going to say something that's going to be annoying, there's going to be

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some kind of argument. So, this is the sign of of the person who is worst among people, may Allah subhanaw taala protect us. So be of those whose goodness is hoped for and other people are safe from our evil, don't be of those whose goodness is not hoped for and people are not safe from their evil May Allah protect us, then what you see over here that have been copied are two brothers, and they are the two sons of other money husana other monies Salam is a prophet of Allah, all right, righteous man. And look at his sons one is so good and the other is not. And yes, this happens, sometimes you see in the same family, one person is righteous, and another is not.

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In fact, you see so much difference between the nature of children from the same family both have been raised by the same parents in the same household, but one child is very calm, very composed, and the other is always on edge. Very rude and harsh. So,

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this is not always in our control, okay, any people vary in their nature, and this is why sometimes a righteous person can have children who are not righteous.

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Then we see over here from this idea that it is not permissible for a believer to kill another believer. Right, which is why have been is so strongly controlling himself, and he's making it very clear that I am not going to try to kill you. Because I fear Allah, the Lord of the Worlds.

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I am not going to try to kill you. That is never going to be my intention. I am not going to fight you back over here because I don't want to kill you. Killing is haram. Allah does not approve of it, and I am afraid of Allah. So this shows us that killing another Muslim, any without a reason without just cause is not permissible.

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Murder is impermissible.

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Another thing we see over here is that her bill makes it clear as to why he is not going to fight back, why he's not going to try to kill Poppy. And this is necessary that sometimes you know you, you do something, or you inform someone about what you are going to do or what you're not going to do. And you don't explain the reason. Explain the reason.

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This is necessary, because people don't always understand what is happening inside of your mind. They don't always understand why you're doing something or why you are going to do something or not going to do something. Right? But especially in this situation, where you are

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uni, where you are being nonviolent, okay, non confrontational, where you're not responding.

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Okay, you're not responding to evil with evil. Here, it is necessary to make it clear that I am not responding over here, not because I am unable, not because I am weak, not because I'm afraid. But because I don't want to commit a sin.

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This is similar to how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us that fasting is a shield. So when one of you is fasting, he should avoid,

00:36:29--> 00:36:40

you know, Rafa, and he should not behave foolishly. Right. And if somebody fights with him, or abuses him, he should tell him, I am fasting, I am fasting.

00:36:41--> 00:36:56

And he's, he's not going to respond to the foolishness. And the argument he's not going to indulge in that argumentation. But he's also going to make it clear why he's not going to indulge in that argumentation, he's going to say I am fasting.

00:36:58--> 00:37:13

So make it clear why you are not engaging in a hostile conversation, okay? Because you are fasting, or because you're afraid of Allah, or because this conversation is not fruitful anymore.

00:37:15--> 00:37:37

Another thing we learned from this ayah is that the Muslim does not harm another Muslim, by his hands, or his tongue. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was asked which of the Muslims is the best. And the Prophet salallahu Salam said, the one from whose hand and tongue other Muslims are safe.

00:37:38--> 00:37:51

And the example of this is Hubby, where he was able to fight back, he was able to kill his brother. But he said he was not going to do that out of the fear of Allah. So this makes a person the best Muslim.

00:37:53--> 00:38:11

And it is not possible for us to have such level of, you know, composure and calm and self-regulation without having the ability to forgive others and overlook their faults. Okay? The thing is that when we

00:38:12--> 00:38:18

just get angry, okay, and we act on that anger. And

00:38:19--> 00:38:24

if we say something out of that anger, we do something out of that anger.

00:38:25--> 00:38:38

It only leads us further and further into being angry and vengeful, it doesn't solve any problem. But when you focus your attention on forgiving and pardoning,

00:38:39--> 00:38:44

then you are able to focus on something that is much better

00:38:45--> 00:38:45


00:38:47--> 00:38:53

anything about it, if you are doing something and your child, your toddler comes in, you know,

00:38:54--> 00:39:17

asks for the pen that you're using, and you refuse to give it because you're using it. But he insists, and he starts screaming and throwing a tantrum, are you going to start throwing a tantrum in response? No. Because you're an adult, it doesn't permit you to throw a tantrum over there. What benefits you over there? Is that okay? You just give the pen and you take another one.

00:39:18--> 00:39:20

All right, you don't

00:39:21--> 00:39:22

have any

00:39:23--> 00:39:44

perpetuate the problem over there. You have to focus on solving the problem. But you cannot solve the problem without forgiving without forgiving the other. So if you think that oh, this child of mine is so disrespectful, so rude, this is this is unrealistic. This is very foolish of you to think like that, because it's a two year old.

00:39:45--> 00:39:52

What do you do with the two year old you ignore that behavior? Right? you overlook that behavior, you pardon that behavior.

00:39:53--> 00:39:55

And you focus on what needs to be done.

00:39:56--> 00:39:59

And likewise, if we deal with other people in the same way

00:40:00--> 00:40:33

they're having an adult tantrum. Okay? They're not able to control themselves. They're too weak inside to control themselves. They should be stronger, but they're being weak. So I'm just going to overlook this behavior, I'm going to ignore it and focus on my work. So those who forgive others and pardon others, Allah subhanaw taala forgives them and pardons them. Allah subhanaw taala raises them in degree. All right far for your resume Allah, pardon people and Allah will honor you.

00:40:34--> 00:40:45

And when a person shows pardon to others, that Allah subhanaw taala increases them in their dignity. Montoya, dar lillahi Rafah hola

00:40:46--> 00:41:14

and especially when someone and another important thing we learned from this ayah is that when someone wants to harm us, and he someone does not want good for us, our heart should be so clean that we still should wish good for them. Because this is what's happening with Hubble over your hubby is saying what he's saying because he ultimately wants to stop RB from committing murder. He wants good for his brother.

00:41:16--> 00:41:21

And then we learned from this idea that the one who truly fears Allah does not

00:41:23--> 00:41:30

any commit wrong even if the ability to do wrong the opportunity to Wrong is Right before them.

00:41:33--> 00:41:57

In the next verse, Allah subhanaw taala tells us in the redo and taboo or be with me What if mica further cornerman us habit now with Alika Jezza or volley mean? Have you said Indeed I want you to obtain thereby my sin and your sin. So you will be among the companions of the fire and that is the recompense of wrongdoers.

00:41:58--> 00:42:13

And we see over here that how bill continues to advise his brother, right first he says in Nehemiah taka Lulu hmil Moroccan, Allah only accepts from the Moodle clean, meaning some introspection is required over here look inward, please don't blame me.

00:42:14--> 00:42:30

And then he says if you extend your hand in order to try to kill me, I am not going to do that I am not going to try to kill you because I fear Love the Lord of the Worlds. So basically, he's telling his brother, that we're supposed to be brothers, not people who try to kill each other and fear Allah.

00:42:31--> 00:43:00

Now he gives him another warning. Okay, and this warning is a very strong warning. And it is that I want you to obtain thereby meaning if you kill me, you're going to take my sin and your sin. And then you will be among the companions of the fire. And that is a recompense wrongdoers, meaning you're doing something terribly wrong. And the outcome of this crime is Johanna

00:43:01--> 00:43:03

it is a nod it is the fire

00:43:05--> 00:43:09

and you will end up with your own sin and ultimate sin.

00:43:10--> 00:43:32

So what are you doing? And sometimes, you have to remind the other person of the truth even if the truth hurts, even if it comes across as very strong, but you have to remind them of it in order to wake them up in order to make them realize the gravity the severity of what they're about to do.

00:43:33--> 00:44:01

So, Hatfield says over here that in the audio and taboo or be it me what ethnic, I want you to obtain thereby my sin and your sin. You need the reason why I am not going to fight you back. I am not going to be the first to assault is because I want that you incur all of the sin, your sin and my sin.

00:44:02--> 00:44:02


00:44:04--> 00:44:21

Here Habil does not want bad for his brother. Okay, this is just a style of speech in order to remind his brother in order to advise him in order to make him realize the severity of what he's doing.

00:44:22--> 00:44:32

Now when he says that, I want that you end up with my son and your son. Okay? What does this mean my sin and your sin.

00:44:33--> 00:44:48

My sin means the sin of killing me, is me. Meaning that isn't of killing me the sin of killing me. And if make your sin refers to the other sins that Kaabil had committed.

00:44:50--> 00:44:59

So if you kill me, then you're going to end up with not just the sins that you've already committed, but along with that you're also going to incur the sin of killing me

00:45:01--> 00:45:09

And this is a lot of sin altogether, a lot of sin, and you're going to end up in the fire. And that is the recommends of those who do wrong.

00:45:10--> 00:45:18

Another interpretation is that my sin and your sin means literally my sin. Okay off

00:45:19--> 00:45:31

of attempting to kill you, if I were to do that, all right, but I am not going to do that. So I'm not going to do that. Why? So that you take all of the sin.

00:45:33--> 00:45:39

Okay? And your sin meaning you're the sin of your attempt to kill me. Okay.

00:45:41--> 00:45:55

So we learn in a hadith that explains this, the prophets of Allah, who are the Sunnah mentioned that when two Muslims meet, and one of them bears arms against his brother, they're both on the brink of hell. And if one of them killed the other, they will both enter Hill.

00:45:57--> 00:46:15

Another version we learn when to Muslims meet with their swords, the one who killed and the one who was killed will go to hell. So the Prophet sallallahu, Arizonan was asked that the killer, we understand why he's going to be in hell, but why the one who is killed the prophets that Allah who doesn't have explained because he was eager to kill his companion.

00:46:17--> 00:46:24

Right? So have you said over here that I am not even going to try to kill you. Why so that you take all of the sin.

00:46:25--> 00:46:47

Because if I want to, if I try to kill you, then I'm going to have some sin. Even if you end up killing me, the sin will be mine, some sin will be mine. So I don't want any share of the sin, I want you to take all of it. So I am not going to try to kill you, I don't intend to kill you, you want to kill me, go ahead and do that and take all of the sin.

00:46:49--> 00:47:01

This is another interpretation. There's another a third interpretation of this. And it is that I want you to take all of my sins, on the day of judgment

00:47:02--> 00:47:22

and also your sins. Okay? Because we learn that the prophets of Allah who are going to explain that on the Day of Judgment, a man will come with a whole lot of good deeds. And you will think that because of all those good deeds, he will attain salvation, He will enter paradise.

00:47:23--> 00:47:24


00:47:26--> 00:47:59

people will come and demand justice from him, because he had committed some kind of injustice, some kind of oppression against them. So what will happen, some of his good deeds will be given to them, then more people will come and demand justice, so more of his good deeds will be given to them, and more people will come and more of his good deeds will be given to them until none of his good deeds will remain. But then guess what? There are still more people coming, demanding justice.

00:48:00--> 00:48:26

Okay. So in that case, what's going to happen, their sins will be given to him, more people will come demanding justice, more sins of people will be given to him. And so where he showed up with a whole lot of good deeds, he will end up with what only sins, his own sins, and also the sins of others that he had committed injustice against.

00:48:29--> 00:48:31

And especially because

00:48:33--> 00:49:07

any, we see that when a person initiate something evil than all those who follow Him, He will have their sin also, while a million dollar home worth Allah Mara of calling him they will carry their own burdens, and also the burdens of all those of others. Who are these others, those that this person had committed injustice against? So Habib is giving a very strong warning to his brother, that do realize what you're about to do, you're going to end up with my sin, and your sin.

00:49:08--> 00:49:16

Whether Lika Jezza or Lolly mean, and that is a recompense of those who do wrong. Now, this shows us that

00:49:18--> 00:49:47

her bill only said this when he knew that Kaabil Cain was very serious, and that he had firmly intended to kill him. And he was going to kill him now. Right? So he said this as a final warning. And it's also possible that he said this as a DA and he idre against Kaabil. And it is permissible for the one who is oppressed to pray against the one who oppresses him.

00:49:49--> 00:49:59

Okay, so he's gradually advising his brother, any each piece of advice becoming stronger than the previous. First he says in ninth a couple of LogMeIn will

00:50:00--> 00:50:42

Talking Allah only accepts from those who are righteous. So please introspect instead of blaming me. Then he says that if you're going to try to kill me, I am not going to try to kill you. Right? We are brothers, we're not supposed to be trying to kill each other. And even if you try to kill me, I am not going to try to kill you. Because I fear Allah. So you should also fear Allah, he's making him have some fear of Allah. And then thirdly, we see that he's making him realize the gravity of the crime of murder, that this is low. And this will bring to you a whole lot of sin, yours and mine, and you're going to end up with the coolamon us harbor now you're going to end up being of the

00:50:42--> 00:50:43

Companions of the Fire.

00:50:44--> 00:51:17

Because this is the outcome of those who kill others. When my Jaco told Minamata midden, the one who kills a believer deliberately for desert wujiang Johanna his recompenses hell holiday and fee Ha he will abide there and eternally will hold the biller who are in a and Allah will be angry with him will learn to who and Allah will curse him who are the who are either been or Lima and Allah has prepared for him a great punishment. And then he tells him what Alika Jessa Oh, Wally mean, that is a recompense of the wrongdoers.

00:51:19--> 00:51:27

Any being in hell, being of the Companions of the Fire This is the recompense of those who do wrong.

00:51:29--> 00:51:40

So, those who do wrong end up incurring a lot of sin. And this is their ultimate outcome. It is Jahannam

00:51:41--> 00:52:12

we learn in a hadith without all the Longhorn reported about how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam warned him about, you know, the upcoming trials and, and tribulation and without kept asking him there will Prophet sallallahu where do you sit and what do you order me to do? What should I do? And at one point, the Prophet sallallahu earlier said, I'm told him that you must stay at home, meaning do not partake in the tribulation in the fitna, do not engage in any act of violence.

00:52:13--> 00:52:21

So without asked that, what if people enter my house and find me? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, If you are afraid,

00:52:22--> 00:52:33

the gleam of the sword may dazzle you then put the end of your garment over your face in order that the one who kills you may bear the punishment of your sins and his

00:52:35--> 00:52:38

your boo Oh, the ethnic our eighth me.

00:52:39--> 00:52:53

Meaning this shows us that the one who killed the other unjustly ends up incurring not just his own sins, but also the sins of the one whom he has killed.

00:52:54--> 00:52:57

So the cartel the killer, is,

00:52:59--> 00:53:13

is any in a lose lose situation. Now there's a number of lessons that we can take from this. First of all, we learned about the gravity of initiating evil, initiating bad practices.

00:53:15--> 00:53:32

And, as we will learn in the upcoming verses, that in the following verses that are veal, when he killed his brother, ended up incurring his own sin, the sin of his brother, and also the sins of all those who followed him.

00:53:33--> 00:53:59

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam also said that none is killed unjustly, but the first son of Adam, meaning kabhi, will have a part of its burden. Why? Because he established the tradition of murdering. So be very careful. What kind of traditions and practices do you initiate? Do you set up? Do you establish in places that you go in people that you live with?

00:54:00--> 00:54:02

In people that you are around?

00:54:04--> 00:54:07

How what kind of practices do you establish?

00:54:09--> 00:54:27

Because if you start something good, and others follow you in doing that, then you will accumulate a lot of good, but if you invent something that is wrong, that is sinful, that is oppressive. And others follow you by for example, if you start teasing someone,

00:54:28--> 00:54:32

and then everybody around you begins to tease them

00:54:33--> 00:54:41

and that eventually turns into bullying. Then all of that bullying, who is responsible for it? You are because you initiated that.

00:54:42--> 00:55:00

If you start backbiting someone, okay? And then everyone continues to talk about about that individual. Who is going to take the majority of the blame over here, it's you because you initiated that. So be very careful about this in

00:55:00--> 00:55:11

Any setting? In any setting? What kind of actions are you doing? And what precedent Are you setting? Right? And what legacy Are you leaving?

00:55:12--> 00:55:21

What practices are you establishing, if it's a good practice, the reward is huge if it's a bad practice, than the sin is also great.

00:55:24--> 00:55:42

Now, another thing that we can truly admire in the character of hubby of Abel, the one who was killed, the one whose sacrifice was accepted, is his ability to self regulate in such a tricky situation.

00:55:44--> 00:56:09

You see, we all find ourselves in situations where people say things to us, or do things that cause us to feel constricted in our chest. Right. And when you feel constricted in your chest, it's only human to want to respond to people to take some kind of revenge, to voice your feelings to express how you feel about them and to take some kind of revenge.

00:56:10--> 00:56:13

But if we act on impulse,

00:56:14--> 00:56:20

any, somebody says something rude, we get angry, and that anger, we want to say something right away.

00:56:22--> 00:56:24

So if we respond without thinking,

00:56:26--> 00:56:35

then we can actually say things that are very damaging, not just add them, but also to our deeds. We can say things that can be a source of great regret for us.

00:56:36--> 00:56:50

So remember, that between emotion and action between emotion and action, there is a space where we decide if and how to respond.

00:56:51--> 00:57:01

Majority of the people what happens with them is that this space is very tiny. So they ended up acting impulsively without thinking through.

00:57:02--> 00:57:39

Okay, so, like Gaby, what happened? His sacrifices not accepted, he gets angry. He says Lachlan, No, he doesn't think through. He just says, I'm going to kill you. He doesn't think about the gravity of what he's about to do. He doesn't think about how he needs to change his his intentions and his actions. He just blames his brother, and he says, I'm going to kill you. And then he acts on that impulse. Right? Why? Because that capacity inside to think through is very limited, that that space is very tiny.

00:57:40--> 00:57:45

Now, that basically means that self regulation skills are not there at all.

00:57:47--> 00:58:00

So it is possible to have self regulation skills, which basically enable the person to take a pause between feeling and action.

00:58:02--> 00:58:17

And you're feeling hurt, you're feeling annoyed, you're feeling humiliated, you're feeling angry. But if you have self regulation, that means that you will take a pause before taking an action.

00:58:18--> 00:58:40

That pause means you're going to take the time to think through, you're going to make a plan, you're going to wait. You're going to decide to do what aligns with your values, what is actually going to help you in your long term goals. Right. So basically, self regulation is the ability to manage

00:58:42--> 00:58:43


00:58:44--> 00:58:48

Okay? It is the ability to think before acting.

00:58:49--> 00:58:56

Okay. Now, many people lack self regulation. How do you develop self regulation skills?

00:58:58--> 00:59:01

There's a lot of research that shows that

00:59:02--> 00:59:13

first of all, mindfulness, okay, mindfulness is something that helps us develop self regulation skills. Basically, mindfulness is that you

00:59:14--> 00:59:22

you fought you pay attention to things, okay, you pay attention to the present moment.

00:59:23--> 00:59:27

And when you practice mindfulness, so for example, through

00:59:28--> 00:59:59

focused breathing, through daily gratitude, you develop the ability to think things through to focus on, you know, to to pay more attention to be more present in the moment. This gives you the ability to also hold your reins when you are in a very heated conversation, or when you're feeling angry. So your skills that you have developed through mindfulness will help you not act impulsively. Okay? Now

01:00:00--> 01:00:21

Allah subhanaw taala has already taught us how to develop mindfulness. Okay, Allah subhanaw taala told us in the Quran he addresses his messenger sallallahu alayhi wasallam that Welaka nairaland will uneca your vehicle Sadhguru kabhi Maya Kowloon we know that your chest is constricted because of what people say.

01:00:22--> 01:00:31

For set B behind the rock Vika welcome Mina Sajid in so exalt Allah with praise of your Lord and be of those who prostrate to him.

01:00:32--> 01:00:49

What is it that Allah's penetrators teaching His Messenger to do? In order to expand his chest in order to ensure that he doesn't feel constricted inside when people say hurtful things to him? Allah subhanaw taala tells us messenger SallAllahu already said them to do this be and to praise Allah.

01:00:51--> 01:01:23

And by Allah, these are two things when Allah He these are two things that improve your ability to have self regulation. When you do this b What are you doing? You are focusing on the glory of Allah azza wa jal Subhan Allah he will be Hamdi Subhan Allah who will be handy, you are forced to slow things down. Right? Think about Allah's glory. And pay attention to what you're saying you're practicing mindfulness.

01:01:24--> 01:01:51

When you praise Allah, you're supposed to have her Sure, if you pray properly, you're supposed to be focused in an attentive in your Salah, humble in your Salah, not thinking about every random thing, not rushing through your prayer. But being humble in your prayer. So if you pray properly, you pray consistently, you will develop a certain level of mindfulness and the ability to to not act on impulse.

01:01:52--> 01:02:15

Right. Another thing that helps people develop self regulation skills is something that is called cognitive reappraisal, which is basically to reinterpret a situation in order to change your emotional response to it. Okay, so for example, somebody says something in a snappy way to you. And you could say, you could think,

01:02:16--> 01:02:18

How dare she speak to me like that?

01:02:19--> 01:02:30

Okay, this is so disrespectful, this is so wrong. This is not acceptable. Okay. And the other is that you challenge yourself over there. And you say, Huh,

01:02:31--> 01:03:22

she is being snappy. She's being rude. I wonder what the issue is over here? Is she tired? Is she hungry? Is she feeling unheard? Is she feeling that I am ignoring her? What's happening over here. So you go with a curious mind, and you talk to them. And you find out that the situation is, you know, much different. So this is basically called personal love to think good of others. Right? So when you think good of others, and you think that other people are good inside, they have the potential to change, right? They have the potential to change, then my goal is to advise them and to help them be the best version of themselves. And this is what we see Habilis doing. Habil is

01:03:22--> 01:03:35

constantly advising his brother. And he even in that tense moment, he says to him, alone, the excerpts from the righteous, He says to him, if you try to attack me, I am not going to do that. Because I fear Allah.

01:03:36--> 01:03:46

He says to him, that, you know, he warns him about the punishment of hell. So what's he focused on, he's focused on

01:03:47--> 01:03:57

preventing his brother from committing the crime of murder. Right. So any he is thinking of how he can save his brother,

01:03:58--> 01:04:01

not just save himself, but also save his brother.

01:04:02--> 01:04:07

So, self regulation is a very, very important skill.

01:04:08--> 01:04:56

It's not just one skill, it's many skills. It's related to emotions and behavior. And this is something incredibly important because if we don't have it, it can actually cause a lot of problems in our lives. It can cause us to be unable to handle stress, and, you know, difficult situations, it can result in anger, it can result in anxiety, it can result in saying things that are very hurtful and damaging, and it can be a source of great regret, if we don't observe if we don't practice self regulation skills. So one of the things that we should ask Allah subhanaw taala for especially in these days and nights of Ramadan, is that Oh Allah, grant me sober. Grant me good o'clock.

01:04:57--> 01:05:00

Alright, grant me calmness and gentleness

01:05:00--> 01:05:35

us because these are all factors that help us manage our behavior, our words, and our, you know, manage our behavior in tough situations. May Allah subhanaw taala grant us all hikma. Inshallah we'll conclude over here for today, and tomorrow will be the last session in Ramadan. About the story of how vielen kabhi Subhanallah Han will be Hemlock a chateau a La ilaha illa Anta a selfie Luca what a lake was salam Wa alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh