Leading the Family

Tahir Wyatt


Channel: Tahir Wyatt

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Tonight, the topic that I was asked to speak about is leading the family shepherding your flock.

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But before we get into the topic directly,

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I think it's important for us to understand the levels of responsibilities in Islam. And also to

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understand the level of disobedience like not all sins are the same. So when we talk about el Kabira por el caballo if we talk about major since

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what's the first thing that comes to your mind? I'm really asking you you can give me some feedback. What do you think about anything major since murder? Uh huh. What else? Uh, shook. So associate partners with the last hand side What else?

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Sorry, Xena adultery and fornication right? Islam

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a rebel right to the interest right. So a lot of times when we think about el caballo these sub panel are immediately what we think about partly because no doubt they are from echo bottle cabana they These are from the greatest of sins and no doubt shift is echo cabana at the profit ideas salons with Sam was asked about what is eco cafe. And he said in touch out in LA, he needs denville HELOC. And he is to set up a rival with a loss mentality even though he is the one who has created you. So there is no doubt that these are major sins. But there are other sins that are major. And a lot of times

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we just don't give them as much consideration or we don't consider them to be major sins.

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And a major sin

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is to neglect fulfilling the rights of those whom Allah subhanaw taala has put under your care. This is a major sin. It's not minor. Not Not that and when we look at the sins, maybe using the term minor we should move away from that there's major sins and then there are lesser sins or Sins of a lesser degree,

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but not fulfilling the rights of those whom Allah subhanaw taala has placed under your care is a major sin. How do we know that? The Prophet it is Salatu was said M.

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Says in a hadith which is collected by Bukhari and Muslim men and I've done yes starter he loves he attend your move to Yama, your moods will who have our shoe Mira yet he in Harlem Allahu la agenda.

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The Prophet sallallahu wasallam says in this howdy

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that there is no slave of Allah, none of you. Home Allah subhanho wa Taala in trust with some people.

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And the day that he dies, he dies as someone who is unfaithful to them. He is not being true to them. He is cheating them who abortion they are yet he except that a loss of hematite Allah will make Jenna haram for him.

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that gender is haram for that person who dies, neglecting to fulfill the rights of those who are under them. He's cheating them. He is a harsh, which we'll talk about in a minute, meaning it Tada. So

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when we look at this Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says that Allah will make gender Han for this person. How do we know what a major sin in Islam is?

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I know some of you study so that's why I'm asking I really do want you to participate. I want you to tell me how do we know the difference between something that's considered to be a major sin and something that's not Yeah.

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Okay, so So when we talk about a punishment here, you're talking about a prescribed punishment ahead. Right? I mean, who do the left so so okay. So if a sin if there is a punishment for that sin,

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a head a prescribed punishment, then we know that that action is a could be done. We know it's a major sin. What else? How else do we know major sense?

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If it's mentioned in the Quran, that what?

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Right so if we have textual evidence that calls something that could be a right to privacy, someone was asked

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an equitable cafe, the greatest of the debate or the grievous

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Those major sins. So any textual evidence that we have that call something a Kabira then we know that it is a major sin by the way, by the way.

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Two of the best books on alphabetic have been translated. I don't know about the trental know that about the quality of the translation, but I'll combat it by a meme of Debbie or him alone without ever having to Debbie is a very, very good book on Tibet. And then there's also a cabana that benefited a lot from the heavy and that's the cabana that was written by Sheikh Mohammed bin Abdul Wahab or himo low tide. So these books will help to gather for you kebabs so that you know, because there's a big difference between major sins and sins that are lesser. The Prophet alayhi salatu salam

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says an authentic hadith he says a jumar to Elijah.

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What I'm Yvonne Illa Ramadan was Salawat two humps cafaro tune, lima bean ohana mich toony batil cabeza, that from one Juma to the next Juma meaning the salaat. And from one Ramadan to the next Ramadan. And each of the five daily prayers from one prayer to the next serve as expiation for your sins

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with a condition what's that condition? Much too many bets in cabana, as long as you avoid the major sense. How do you avoid major sins if you don't know what they are?

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Right? So it's very important that we actually know what the major sins are, so that we're able to avoid them. Not that we want to do any sense, but especially to avoid the major sense. So what are those major sins again, whatever lost pantalla the prophet SAW Selim calls it could be whatever there is a punishment in the dunya ahead punishment prescribed for it. Anytime a sin is connected to negation of a man

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right so when the prophesy Psalm says that he manna, Lima amanatullah, there is no amen for the one who has no trust and he doesn't fulfill his trust, for example, now, you know, I had to come and tell you, hey, Billy, I think you know, you hit the nuptse, and so forth. So these types of things when the prophets I send them the gates email, then we know that it is a Kabira. The last thing that I mentioned about this, this issue of major sins

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is when there is a threat of punishment in the Hereafter,

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which is the case here. So the prophet Isaiah Salatu was Salam says that a person who dies whom Allah subhanaw taala has put in charge of something, and then they die, being unfaithful to that responsibility.

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Then Allah has made gender haram for them.

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This means that this is a major sin to be a gosh.

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Okay, now, let's we have to break this down. A lot of times. So pedalo, we hear is we hear a hadith but we don't really take the time to go in and kind of dissect the words that the Prophet sallallahu wasallam didn't have to do that. He's talking to people, they understood everything he was saying.

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For us, we have to kind of go back and break some things down. So what does what does it mean? This, what does that mean? And this Howdy, what we usually translate English as cheating, right? So you probably heard the Howdy, men rashanna. Right. So Lisa Mina, whoever cheats us, right is not from us. This is also one of the forms that show you that it's a major sin by the way, the promise is negating that this person has promised. Okay.

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This here to cheat is the opposite of and not and not. Okay. So we're going to learn some some words today. What is not and what is naseeha?

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Miss Miller, I'm listening.

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What did you say? sincerity? Hmm, that's good. Most people translate not to see her as advice. But But no. Okay, actually, and they'll see hat means to be true to something. This is probably where you get to work the concept of sincerity. Okay? To be true to something. That's necie hat. Okay. So when you're a truth to something, you are faithful to that thing. And when we talk about relationships, we usually use the word fidelity

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and to not be true to something to be unfaithful in a relationship.

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They call it What? infidelity right infidelity. So be these ish here actually means that you are cheating. Okay? You are cheating the people who are under your care how are you cheating them because they deserve certain things from you and they're not getting that so you're not being faithful to that relationship you're not being true to that relationship. There is no one whom Allah subhana wa tada has put in charge of anything ma'am and I've done yes sir He he left who right he attend your move to Yama your moves will who will allow shouldn t in the hub um, Allahu Allah his agenda, okay. No one is put in charge of something entrusted with with a flak.

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And he dies the day that he dies in a state where he is unfaithful to that responsibility, except that a loss of data will make Jenna hold on for him. Now, let us look at this Hadith, because there is a reason that this hadith was was revealed. Or there's a lot not that it was revealed. But there's a story behind the narration of this Hadeeth. And that story

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is the story of obey the law. It is yet who was the governor of bussola at the time of Mongolia of the low China anyone is Sonia's eat.

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So Vega live is yet went to visit the Sahabi. Martin been you saw him Oh, lo Tada.

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And when he went to visit Martin,

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and Mussolini alota, annual this he was actually on his deathbed, he went to visit him. At the time when he was dying, it was it was the illness in which he that he would die from

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Am I could have been YOU SAW said, I'm going to tell you a hadith

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that I heard from the Prophet sallallahu it was something

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if I didn't fear that I was going to die

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in this state Yanni, meaning during this illness that I have, I wouldn't have revealed this hadith to you, I wouldn't have said this howdy to you. And that's because just so that we that we're clear, sometimes knowledge will get you in trouble. Meaning that if you teach certain things to certain people, that there may be consequences for teaching them.

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You may be punished in fact for saying certain things to certain people. So

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it is permissible to delay the teaching of certain things. If it is feared that there will be a negative consequence for teaching that or if there's some muscle has some type of benefit and not

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you know, teaching that knowledge at that particular point. There's several IDs that deal with this particular point in any event.

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So maka living Assad says to obey the law. Even Ziad, I'm going to tell you this hadith that I heard from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and then he said the Hadith that we're talking about here, there's no slave from Las pantallas, but in charge of something. Now, obviously, at this point, he's speaking to who he's speaking to the governor of bustle. And basically, he's admonishing him, right, he's telling Listen, you have a huge responsibility on your shoulders.

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So this is what this hadith is about. But does that mean

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that this hadith is specific to those who are in charge of, you know, cities or states or nations?

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No, that is not what this means.

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In fact, we have from the Hadith of the Prophet Isaiah is Salatu was Salam that which clarifies this hadith

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and makes us understand

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how important each and every one of us is in terms of our role as being responsible, okay, as being shepherds.

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So the prophet Isaiah selects was Sudan

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couldn't lukumi nukem ra

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each one of you is a ra. And we usually translate that a shepherd

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each one of you as a caretaker, we'll talk about the what this means in a minute inshallah so just try to understand what the prophesy Simon saying here. He says kulu Kumar will could lucam mess EU loan out right yet he each one of you is a shepherd

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Each one of you is mess all about his flak. Okay? What this mess all mean? We usually translated as responsible, right? So each one of you is,

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is a shepherd and each one of you is responsible for his flack. But I know that some of you are, you know a little bit more about this. So, where does the word myschool come from?

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what's what's the every word in Arabic not every word but a lot of words in Arabic go back to a three letter root, right? three letter verb, trilateral verb root. So what are we talking about here?

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Set Allah, what does that lead me?

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to question something to ask. So the mess All right, is on the MEF old form, which means that this person will be asked and that's why we say that this person is responsible. But it really means that they are mess old that they are going to be asked by Allah Subhana who what's odd about their flock to scary. It's scary, because you're not just responsible now for yourself and you're not just going to be asked about what you do. But you're also responsible and going to be asked about the people who are under your care your flock.

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So, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam says each one of you as a shepherd, and each one of you will be asked about his flock.

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The process of aligning with something then goes on to detail, some of whom you and some of those people who will be questions so the Prophet sallallahu it was sent him says for me to leave the island Nessie line will who are Massoud on our Yeti he

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Ludhiana ness now so he says that the Amir the Amir, who is over the people, he is in charge of people and he will be asked about them. He will be asked about he will be asked about

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his justice that he wronged them that he provide for the people who were under his care that which they needed to survive and thrive both in the dunya and in their relationship with the loss of Hannah who attacked him and he did Amir has a huge responsibility. It's not something that people a lot of times people look at it as tissue leaf being honored when it's really tech leaf you're being put under a a great responsibility when you are the Amir of something.

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And so the Prophet it is selected with Sam goes on to say what Roger Lu ra will who miss ulaan and home What would you do Ryan? Allah le beta he will who have missed Odin and home and a man.

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Notice the previous item here says what Roger, a man

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is the shepherd for the people of his home

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and he is going to be asked about them he is responsible for them and he will be asked about them.

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And the word Rajan By the way, a lot of times when it's used in the,

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in the text of the Quran and the Sunnah, if you go back and look throughout the Quran

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you'll see that it's used to honor the man to talk about the qualities of manhood.

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type one or two or year tune Allah Beatty barely had one lady he was he Emma school.

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And the woman, a woman is the shepherd for her husband's home and his children.

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And she is responsible

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and will be asked about them.

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These two major responsibilities, the home and the children and we'll talk about that in a minute and shall learn a little bit.

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And then the Prophet it is Salatu was Salam goes on to say well I do ra in either Maddie so ye will who I'm assuming and

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and the slave or the servant is the shepherd of his masters property and he will be asked about that.

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For kulu Kumar, the prophecy some goes back and he repeats. Each one of you, therefore, is a shepherd and each one of you will be asked about his flock. Danny, each one of you is a caretaker.

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And each one of you will be asked about those things that are under

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Your responsibility and under your care if whiny brothers and sisters,

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we should be scared.

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We really should be. Because if we look back and ask ourselves, are we really taking this responsibility

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as seriously as we should?

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Are we doing everything that we can to ensure that the people who are under our care are successful

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in this life and the next

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that we ensure that we are doing what we can to make sure that they have

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a good relationship with their Creator.

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So panela

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many parents

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would be extremely upset if their children missed final exams.

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Like, if you got a call from the school and say, Hey, your son didn't show up the you know, to take the exams,

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your daughter didn't come into take her finals? Is everything okay?

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You would be you would be trying to figure out what's going on and you will go talk to your children, what what are you doing missing your test,

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yet, they miss a lot and

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not the same reaction, or so lots of thought. And so lots and lots of not the same reaction

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to it. So

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when we do things like that, we're actually showing them that we care so much more about the doing it than we care about, they're here after

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the little things that we do.

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Or how we react to certain things that the level of anger that we get when something goes wrong, or how we show appreciation when things go right, that says a lot to to our children.

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The point here is that the Prophet it is Salatu was set in has mentioned that each one of us is a shepherd.

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we don't live in an agricultural society.

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For the most part,

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I don't know about Allentown maybe we are kind of in the sticks up here. But

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for the city dwellers, it's a little different. But I think it's important for us to talk about some aspects of what a shepherd is, what is what is that?

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Because the prophets on the line, he was send them in this hadith is giving us this parable, he's laying out this example for us. So that we take all of these meanings into consideration.

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So when you think of a shepherd,

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what do you what do you think of what what does the shepherd do? What is the shepherd? I really want? I'm asking because all of you have heard this heavy before most likely. But are we making these connections? And some of the young brothers what's a shepherd? You know, a shepherd is?

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Anybody? What does it sound like?

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Okay, someone older brothers, what is the shepherd?

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It was, well, the shepherd usually is just dealing with the sheep. But imagine, hence the hence the word ship in the beginning, sheep herder becomes a shepherd. So it's the one who herds

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sheep, and tends to them and, and guards and protects them. Right? So when you look at a shepherd, you're talking about the primary responsibility of a shepherd is to safeguard the sheep. Right, and to ensure the welfare of the sheep. Okay. Now,

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let's, let's dig a little deeper because there are some meanings that need to come out here for us to really understand what it means when the prophet Isaiah Salatu was Sudan is saying that each one of you is a shepherd. Each one of you is at all and each one of you will be asked about his flock to you. So if we say that the idea of of safeguarding and caretaking, tending and hurting so when we when you herd sheep, what does that mean? You keep them all together, which means that what most likely they're going to be sheep that start going

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A stray stray away from the flock, right? And so the shepherd has to do what? Make sure that the sheep stays with the with the rest of the sheep. I want you to think about this, then what happens? Sometimes there's so many of them, right? I mean, you might have 1000, sheep, 500 sheep. And it's just one Shepherd, maybe as guard dogs that helped them out. But sometimes some of the sheep Get lost. So what does the shepherd has to have to do, has to go out and find the sheep and bring a bed sheet By the way, many of them are not the brightest creatures,

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they'll see a cliff and literally walk off the cliff.

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Just like some of our children, so panela. So the shepherd has to go and try to make sure that the sheep stay, you know, stay together. So the herd the sheep tends to the sheep, meaning that one makes sure that the effect that they go out to pasture, right?

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That the sheep come back at a certain time, bring them back so that they can go to sleep. He even helps deliver the lambs sometimes. Okay, I mean, they tends to all of the needs of the sheep eat their health needs, and so forth.

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And he guards those sheep.

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From what?

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from predators, right. So I mean, there's wolves, there's dogs, there's all types of things out there that may attack the sheep, and also their poisonous plants that she may eat from that the shepherd has to make sure that they don't eat from those areas, right. So keep this in mind as we go along. So what is the shepherd doing right caretaking? Now, few points that I want to mention?

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Does the shepherd own the flock.

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Pay attention here.

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In general, the shepherd does not own the flock. The shepherd is hired by the owner of the sheep to do that job. So the shepherd does not own the flat and is responsible to someone else.

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Let's look back at the Hadith. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says what each one of you is a shepherd. And each one of you will be asked about his flock or her flock. The man is the shepherd of the people of his home.

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And he will be asked about them does he own the people in his home? No, even though he says this is my child, this is my wife, they belong to Allah subhana wa tada and you have a job to be the shepherd, you have a job to protect them, you have that job to ensure their well being

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but you don't own them. And that's why you have to answer to Allah subhanahu wa tada about them, the shepherd does not own the flock.

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Another very important point, when we just think about shepherds in general, before we get into specifics of responsibilities, a shepherd has to be extremely patient.

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And that is because the shepherd is dealing with so many different sheep. And each of these sheep have their own temperament. I don't know if the word personality works for sheep, because they're not people. Right? But sheep have their each one just dislike animals just like your regular pets, if you have two cats.

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Most likely one cat is one way and another cat is a different way. They don't have the same temperament. Right? And so imagine now you multiply that number. So the shepherd is dealing with all of these different temperaments and has to learn how to get them to move in unison sometimes and how to work through these things.

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The shepherd also works tirelessly for the flock, okay, so this is something to keep in mind, a shepherd is going to have to exert a lot of effort to make sure that the flock is taken care of.

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and a shepherd is not paid much. This is not one of those jobs, where people aspire to, you know, when, when when you're young and you ask the children, what are you going to be when you grow up and they say, I'm going to be a shepherd and it's not one of those type of jobs.

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Where pays you a whole lot of money. But the shepherd finds rewarding what and seeing his or her flock flourish. That's where the reward is found.

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It's not one of those jobs where you're going to get a lot of monetary reward. a shepherd has to be very, very watchful and vigilant.

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Oh, you have to keep this in mind because what are we talking

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About You, each one of you as a shepherd,

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When your child says, Hey, I need my own space,

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this, give me my own space, okay? by him, you can give them their own space. But you still have to remain vigilant and watchful. You have to watch for behavior patterns and changes and all these types of things. So panela, we are responsible. And so a shepherd is very vigilant, very watchful. Can you imagine a shepherd with

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100 sheep, and it kind of just busy on their phones, scrolling through social media, and just not really paying attention to the sheep? That's, that is a recipe for disaster.

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Okay, so Shepherd has to be very vigilant. And watch.

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Likewise, a shepherd leads gently, okay, firm. So the shepherd sets boundaries, that's what a shepherd does for the sheep to make sure that they don't go out of bounds that they don't eat from another, you know, from a property that that they can't eat from or whatever, he set certain limits, right. But there's still a gentleness that a shepherd deals that the shepherd has to lead with.

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And the shepherd, actually, and I know this might sound a little strange, but the shepherd develops a relationship with those sheep, whereby the sheep trust him. So panela, I mean, it's an amazing thing to see. The sheep actually trust their shepherd. All right, but that's because of the type of leadership that the shepherd displays. So putting that all together,

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if we look at what a shepherd does,

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the main responsibility is to

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herd the sheep,

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to protect them from any external threats and to attend to them to make sure that they are eating properly, to make sure that they are sleeping properly, to make sure that they are their general well being is okay.

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If we recognize that,

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then we will understand better why every single Prophet

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was a shepherd.

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The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, my bath Allahumma Bian

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in love, I love him. He said that every prophet that was sent by Allah that Allah Subhana, Allah did not send a prophet, except that he tended to the sheep, except that he was a shepherd.

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For Carlos haba, who went and he the companions of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said and you the prophets of Laila Simpson now come to Araya and a Cora rica the anti Mecca the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said yes, I tended to them for a few Cora reserved for the people of Mecca and a pea rock

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is a 20 p rights equal Edina and a D naught was the they at the time of the prophet Isaiah select was today they use that data homina Dena, the data ham is silver, and the dinar is gold. Right? So the P rot is not a it's not a lot of money. And again, if we look back, like I said before, shepherds don't tend to get paid a lot of money. So he say I used to do it for a few periods for the people of Mecca. So the prophet Isaiah select within himself was an actual Shepherd, right, actually tended to the sheep

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and, and have been hedger, Mahima, hula hota, Anna,

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and others from amongst the scholars have mentioned that the hikma and the prophets of the light it was Solomon all of the prophets being shepherds,

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so that they would get used to

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that tending to the sheep, so that they would get used to the different temperaments and different personalities. And so that they would develop a hill was chef aka Jani that they would be forbearance and that they would have concern over the people.

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So this is this is actually a training for them even before they were sent this profits like the profits aligned with someone was doing this in Mecca before he was sent as a profit so that he would get used to that concept of caring for a large group of people.

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What's my time looking like?

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Yeah, let's see.

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Okay Bismillah

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now let me go directly into

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what, what we have to do here as leaders of our flocks. And I realized that the time is quite short. So

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we see here that the President salatu salam has distinguished between a man and a woman. He says that the man, listen, he says, what what you learn and he, Beatty, he, the man is the shepherd for the people of his home, he's the caretaker of the people of his home. And then he goes on to say, and the woman is the caretaker of

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the home, she's the caretaker of the home and the children. That means that there's overlap. That means that both

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the man and the woman share and that responsibility of the children of the caretaking for the children, though their responsibilities are going to be slightly different. There is some overlap, and they have to work together to raise those children. Now, the man is responsible for everybody in the house, including his wife. Now, what does that mean? I think it's very important for us to understand because what a lot of times what happens is

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because we begin to understand this responsibility, a little more in like, wait a minute, I'm going to be asked by lots of hands out, we become overbearing

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with the demands that we make. And, and that overbearing, yeah, I mean, that that hips, if you will, that trying to to, that concern that we have for our families comes from a good place. It really does, it comes from it comes from a good place, because we're concerned about what Allah Subhana Allah is going to ask us. But we also have to weigh the pros and the cons and how we, how we implement that. Because if you're too hard, you will break them. If you're too hard, you're going to break them. And if you break them, you haven't done much good.

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So it's very, we have to be very careful about that now, and perhaps maybe when we get to the considerations, I'll talk about this, the the first and primary responsibility that we have towards our children, is that we teach them about the oneness of Allah subhana wa tada and his right to be worshipped alone.

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And this goes well beyond just the academic side of tawheed. No doubt, look mine. In the Quran, Allah Subhana Allah tells us that the first thing that he says to his child was what? Yeah, boo. Now you learn to stick the lead in the ship gullible, Navin, oh, my child, you have blue name? And that's a term of endearment. Right? Do not associate partners with a lot. But it should does it stop at any bowing down to a statue?

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Or does it go well beyond that? Right. So when we talk about showing off, isn't showing off a form of shift, though it is a lesser form of shift?

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And what are we teaching our children when we allow them to go on social media? And everything that they're doing is what? Showing off? Everything. Yani, in other words, what happens now?

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Is that, okay, they have these accounts, we are paying

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for the devices that they're using, we're paying for the internet that they're using, we're paying for the roofs that they live under, and everything else, right.

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And then they get on these,

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these platforms, and everything is about talking about what they've done.

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Everything becomes about what I did.

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And what happens is we're building personalities that require

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validation from the outside. So no longer is a person confident in themselves and their relationship with the loss of habitat until somebody else validates for them their own existence. And it gets very extreme.

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And I've given this example before, but this is this literally has happened.

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where a person takes a picture of their of their food, okay dinner,

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and they put it on Instagram, and they eat the food, but they didn't really enjoy the food until somebody

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says, Oh, that looks really good, that looks delicious. Oh, then it tasted good.

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Because they no longer have a sense of

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their own validation.

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And their relationship with the loss of Hannah Montana to the point as all of you know, many people make to offer around the Kaaba holding a phone filming themselves as they make to off.

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Right? And even and we need to be careful about this. Danny, what is the point of filming? salaat? Seriously? Why do we film salaat?

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The hoppers and that's understandable, right? Because that that's actually information that people are benefiting from. But why are we filming these accidently bad? Did it not happen if we didn't film it? I mean, some people actually say that. If you didn't document it, it didn't happen. No, believe me, the angels are writing it down. for better for worse. So this concept of tawheed the prophets of light was sent them ingrained this in the young companions, the prophet sorry, someone said to even our best, well, the alota angle May Allah will end it for the lay folk.

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Be mindful of a lot all the time that we usually translate is to protect the boundaries of a law and the law will protect you. But if if I if I told you it for the Koran, what does that mean? to memorize the Quran, which means that if you go memorize something, then it's always weird. It's always on your mind. And for the lag, it makes sure that you are always Cognizant and conscious of Allah subhana wa tada and Allah subhanaw taala will protect you.

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And he teaches this to even our best while I'm in the oma, even my best was not he didn't hit puberty yet. He says know that if the entire Obama was to come together to benefit you, they would only benefit you with something that allows him to either have already written for you. And if they came together to harm you, they could only harm you with that which one? What Allah subhanaw taala had already written against you

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don't get caught up into numbers and to people in this no Be your own person. This is something that the Prophet audience alliance with Sam is instilling

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in the youth, and it's it this is part of tawheed that we worship Allah subhanahu wa tada alone. What does it mean to want to worship or to worship Allah Subhana Allah alone, that we seek our reward from him alone.

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That's so important, because showing off means that what I want somebody else to do what? To praise me, that's a form of reward. Or I'm doing something because I don't want other people to say anything negative about me.

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I want to avoid an awkward situation, that's a form of reward being sought from other than Allah subhanho wa Taala, we have to be very careful about that. And as parents, we have to instill this in our children. I know. I know. I'm so panela I will just very quickly just say some other things very quickly to wrap this up. We have to instill in our children the importance of select this is something that the man and the woman, husband and wife have to work diligently on any making sure that our children understand the importance of select what more I like a bit selecting what's the big idea, command your family with the prayer and you also be patient and in the performance of that

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prayer, meaning that you have to serve as an example for your children will lie declining. And he was sending our children out to the wolves and put them in these public schools.

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Like right now and I know and nobody's going to school because of COVID I don't think but if your children go to school from eight o'clock in the morning till three o'clock in the afternoon, that means they have to pray select the door at school. They have to because the light goes out while they're in school. What are we doing to ensure that environment are we saying it's okay it's okay just pray it when you get home No it's not okay will lie It's not okay.

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And you are Miss old you are going to be the one asked by Allah Subhana Allah because Moodle have never come to Salah well whom abnormal seven Seni command your children with the site when they get that at the age of seven. I mean, we can go on and on. A flap is very important, something that the prophets of light was instilled in the young companions, even even the minor etiquettes of how to eat some molests a Bismillah before you eat what could be a minute and eat and eat with your right hand we'll call him a leak and eat to that which is closest to you on the plate. Right? So instilling these these issues of Aflac, teaching your children to love the Prophet Mohammed Abdullah

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Saleh it was setting up like like the setup used to do teaching them to love the companions of the Messenger of Allah sallallahu cinematic even Ennis by him. Oh, hello. Tada. The man. You

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Medic, he said Ken is set up who is the mono lead the home hook Bobby bucket and what Omar, come at you on the moon, a pseudo terminal caught on that they would teach the self use. And this is a mathematical guide in 179. He's saying that the self Eonni those who preceded him from the scholars of Assam from the righteous predecessors who preceded him, they would teach their children to love every bucket and Omar rather the Allahu Tana and women like they would teach a sorter from the Quran. I mean, look at that type of care. And look at that type of concern. Most of us, if somebody said to you right now, if somebody comes up to you have a knock on your door, some strange guy, and

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he says, Hey, can I can I come into your house? I've got this woman in the car. I just, I don't want to do this in the car. I like to, you know, I like to kiss her in your house. What are you talking about? He mean, so you know, it's your wife. I mean, take no, it's not my wife, some lady I met at the souk, you know, at the market, and I just need a private place. Most of us will go crazy. What are you talking about? Get out my house. But we bring the television in the house. And we turn it on. And there's a strange guy kissing a strange woman and you watch it with your children? Like it's okay. And it's not.

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It's not okay. You know, as the scholars of his name, many of the contemporary scholars have mentioned that those who bring these things into their houses, and they don't teach their children responsible use these tools, by the way, their tools, right? It's like, it's like this bottle right here. This bottle, you can fill it up with water, and that's hella you can fill it up with alcohol. It's not allowed that it's just the

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it's just a container.

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These things that we bring into our homes or containers, even the internet www, there's a lot of good things WW, and there's a lot of haraam things have you. Have you taught your children a proper use of these tools. And if you haven't, and you die, and they use it in a way that is displeasing to a loss of habitat, or perhaps you share in that sin.

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So be careful of what you bring into your home. Be careful of those things that your children are learning teach them and this is part of towhee by the way, to teach them that it is a loss of habits Allah who is watching them even when I can't see you. It is a law who hears you even when I can.

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It is a loss of hand with either who knows what is in your heart Even though I don't any teaching this to your children so that they develop their own relationship with the loss of hematite so that they love him so that they fear him subhana wa Tada. And this is a good fear, this is a healthy fear, and so that they hope in his reward and hope and his mercy Subhana who attack me These are things many responsibilities that we have. And I know my time is way over. So I'm going to stop. So panela I just think that it's important for us to take this seriously and to recognize that not fulfilling that responsibility. The man not fulfilling fulfilling his responsibility to the people

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of his household. A woman that was fulfilling that responsibility to her household and to her children, that this is a major sin. And major sins do not get wiped out from salatu salam from Ramadan, Ramadan, they get wiped out through Toba

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through true repentance and tilbyr means to turn around.

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And we usually translated as repentance but I want you to imagine literally turning around you're going down a path that is displeasing to Allah Subhana Allah, so you stop and you turn around, and you vow never to go back to that path that was displeasing to Allah subhana wa Tada, you turn to the way that is pleasing to Allah subhanho wa Taala. That is true total. And that you feel that remorse.

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I'm hoping that each and every one of us takes a second look. And that we say wait a minute, am I really fulfilling my responsibility as a shepherd?

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Many of us we look to everybody else.

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And we can praise ourselves because we you know, our household is better than this particular household and we're more pious and we preserve our prayers, while humbly you know there's a lot we're not doing is a lot we're not doing and if we're busy with ourselves, we really won't have time to be comparing ourselves to anybody else. It was very important that we realize that to not fulfill those responsibilities to neglect that is a major sin, and that we all take account of ourselves before the day comes that Allah subhanaw taala takes account of us. Well low tide items kind of colonial humbucker shadow Knight and anti subcritical it's ridic