Sarah Sultan – When Gossip Hurts
AI: Summary ©
The speakers stress the importance of mental health and acceptance of one's actions in Islam, as well as avoiding negative thoughts to avoid becoming the life of the party. They also remind people of the power of their actions and offer resources for rethinking their story and making healthy changes. The speakers stress the importance of protecting from "slime" and avoiding future mistakes through socializing and forgiveness, as well as upcoming events and a video about donating. They also mention restrictions on the " sight of light" and the " sight of light" on society, including negative behavior and negative consequences.AI: Transcript ©
Across the emotive channels welcome everyone to day number 18 Ramadan 360s. The story of revelation by Amago Institut Alhamdulillah we have an honorable guest with us today sister sorrows Allah and inshallah is going to be doing today's session our topic is going to be when gossip hurts, and the focus is going to be on the uncertainty of newer iOS 11 to 26. So please make sure that you have those ready, we'll drop those in the chat as well Inshallah, as we start this session, so that you guys can keep up Inshallah, also just a side point, there is a full booklet with all of the verses that we're covering
the Arabic and the English in your resource section on your student portal. So for especially for those who are registered here for free at Ramadan, three sixty.org When you go into your student portal, just go to Resources, there's a booklet that has a summary of all of the all the verses, if you want to look ahead to see which verses are going to be covered in the future or if you just want to recap the ones that we've done in the past, of course the dropping them here in the chat and telegram and everywhere but that will be a nice little summary for you all inshallah and that booklet is going to be available for you even after Ramadan 360 ends and the recordings are
available for lifetime Inshallah, that I hope that you guys have been doing well, I do want to take a second of course to shout out the the folks that make this experience for Ramadan 360 possible every year. Of course we have our amazing charity partners. In the US we have helping hands for relief and development. For Canada we have Islamic Relief Canada and then for the UK and we have forgotten women, you guys have been supporting them generously throughout this month, please continue to do so inshallah every opportunity that you get, especially as you're going into the last 10 Nights please make them as a consistent part of your donations inshallah. And of course, I'm okay
with also fundraising for our [email protected] or slash donate to do to support the next 20 years of excellence that we've had have not been able to curate with them, okay, to support all the classes, some of the big initiatives, some of the challenges that we have, with keeping up the operations of an institution of this size and continuing and growing across the globe. Insha Allah so please do make sure that you're giving as much as you can to that cause as well. All of those are linked in their bio on social media, and they're dropped once or twice a day here in the chat as well. So make sure that you just open up for links when you have access to them in sha Allah. Of
course we're going to have Dr. Mahathir came back with us at the end of today's session for Ark or on reflect So note the things that you guys want to reflect on that you want to share from SR sorrows talk and inshallah you'll get a chance to share your own thoughts and your own experiences. SR SR is actually a licensed professional counselor, and she's a licensed mental health counselor mashallah you probably benefited from her works from Yaqeen Institute. She's a contributor there and Masha Allah, she's been a big part of the Maghrib family in recent years. She's been on a lot of our programming for Ramadan 360 for the hijab 360 A lot of our webinars in the past and for those who
caught it, she is Masha Allah a part essential part of our mental health course inside outside and that we launched during COVID When a lot of people are going through some really difficult mental health struggles and she's completely shines in that course I'll try to drop a link here as well for those who had did not get a chance to register 1000s of people benefited from that course due to her her work and her efforts. So I hope that you guys get a chance to really benefit during this talk. And with that being said, inshallah I want to bring sister Sarah salon on to the screen and not take any more time away from her talk As Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah Sarah How you doing today? Why
don't you go sit down what if I were to get you I'm doing well how am the lead so wonderful to be here?
I haven't I'm really well it's wonderful to have you I saw you mashallah where you were in person with us as well during the infest this past January? I was so bummed to miss that but inshallah more to come more to come as we completely come back post COVID How's your Ramadan been going so far has been Yeah, and hamdulillah it's been really wonderful. I've been enjoying it and hamdulillah
as the kids get older, it's always a new experience which is which is enjoyable. So we How old are they now and what stage are they transitioning into in the masjid themselves so so my son is almost 10 He'll be 10 in a couple months inshallah and then my daughter is eight and a half mashallah so we're able to go on and on non school nights
and we're able to you know, they they enjoy waking up for school and you know, trying to move fast and you know, all of these different things Michelle online so it's it's exciting to see their love of Ramadan developing too. So it's been it's been fun Hamdulillah that sounds amazing mashallah, how is this Ramadan feeling different for you from previous Ramadan? I know it's been like a few crazy years so what is it that you're enjoying specifically? That's Ramadan. You know, I think seeing for for me this summer alone is a little bit easier than pass it on hold on to Ben at hand and I think it just comes with different stages, different seasons in life. And so the fasting has, you know,
has been easier, which is beneficial.
But I think that just being able to slow down I think the older that I get, I just realized, okay, you know, I can I can
decide how I want to use my time in a way that's going to be most beneficial for me in terms of my connection with Allah subhanaw taala. So if I need to be able to take a nap, to be able to function and pray at night, then I can, and hamdulillah and before that I was very resistant to that and so, so it's, it's so little things, little things like that and, you know, being able to say no to certain invitations like okay, hey, we're gonna we're just gonna relax and stay at home so we can get an early night and everything so it's as I get older, I realize the way that I engage in my time is a little bit different, which adds more value to Ramadan. hamdulillah that's a great point, you
know what Subhanallah I think it takes the wait so many years to learn this but you when you become a little bit more forgiving of yourself and your prioritize your about that. And you try not to do everything and be everything to everyone at all times, especially during Ramadan, completely different experience, then you get to actually eke out the joy of that month and the blessings that have that it lies though, that you mentioned that now I know you have a really heavy topic to cover. I'm really excited to hear Inshallah, your talk and then we'll come back at the end. And we'll ask you some questions. But this isn't necessary, I want to pass you the stage to take away this is Zach
laughing. This one I was left with some a lot of silly allow on and he was talking to a woman, Willa, I'm just gonna say it again for having me on with all of you, I'm really excited to be here. And Hamdulillah. And I chose these particular verses, because this was a very impactful incident in the Sierra and then a time of the Prophet Muhammad, Salah lives on them. And so I'm going to be covering these amazing verses from students at node. And my structure is going to be a little bit different than my typical structure when when I do a talk. And what's going to be different is that I'm going to go verse, verse by verse and do a deep dive into each verse that we're going to be
covering because there are so many gems and lessons that you can find in these amazing verses. And they talk about the harms of speaking ill of one another ways to prevent ourselves from falling into that, but then also really helpful ways to, to think about these types of incidents when they happen to us personally. So if somebody speaks ill of you how to how to manage that, how to manage that emotionally, Islamically, psychologically, and so so it's really powerful. So I'm going to be covering from verse 11, to 26. But I'm actually going to even start with verse 10, in sha Allah, but I wanted to give you a little bit of background about the incident that this covers this covers the
incident of the if it was called, which was the slandering of our mother, I shout out the law on him. So there was a companion Well, I mean, I don't know terms, he wouldn't be termed a companion because he was the head of the hypocrites, them unethical and in Medina named Abdullah and obey. And he started a rumor by vague insinuation, by just a vague insinuation that there was some inappropriate conduct between a shadow the law on her and a soldier. Now, you know, even this vague insinuation of enemy buddy is harmful. But now imagine a vague insinuation about our mother I shot on the lawn, so she was accidentally left behind when the caravan was returning from battle. And
they thought that she was within her
vestibule right like this, this, this the top of the carriage that would be added on top of the camel. They thought that she was inside when they loaded it up, but she had been looking for a necklace that she was missing, and she lost her way. So she got delayed. And then when she arrived, she found that the caravan had left. So she did whatever she needed to do. And she just waited and wrapped herself up and fell asleep at the campsite while waiting for the caravan to return. And once they realized that she had been left behind, but the companions of one found her and escorted her back to the caravan. So he found her sleeping there. He realized it was her. And he in with full
modesty escorted her back to the caravan so she could be reunited with the group. When he saw them together, Bella and obey started a rumor that set in motion a whole series of events that cast a shadow over the Muslim community for quite a while for over a month until Allah subhanaw taala revealed a at that proved eye shadow, the law and the law on his innocence. And so during this in this incident, there were families that were torn apart because of the discrepancy in information and because of this gossip mongering, that was that was happening. And so it shows the harm that can come even to the most righteous. And it shows the harm that we can fall into, even when we are
worshipers of LS paradata because the companions of those SLM, were not immune to falling prey to this gossip. Right. So we're going to start with verse 10. And sorrows
Ignore where Allah subhanaw taala before he delves into the admonishments before he delves into the directives that he's giving to the Muslims and the warnings that he's giving to the Muslims, he starts with this verse, he says, and if not for the favor of Allah upon you and His mercy, you would have suffered and had Allah not been Accepting of repentance and the all wise.
So Allah's path that starts the story before he delves into the story he with he reminds us of His mercy, and his wisdom, and his acceptance of repentance, which is so incredibly powerful when you think about who the slander was against. And when you think about the severity of the sin, and so as you listen to these at and this story unfold, and all of the gems and lessons within it, try to consider the wisdoms of Allah subhanho data and the favours and mercies of Allah's pancetta that manifest through these verses, and that's what we're going to delve into inshallah. So in verse 11, Allah subhana wa Tada says, Indeed, those who came up with that outrageous slander are a group of
you do not think that this is bad for you, rather, it is good for you, they will be punished each according to their share of the sin. And as for the mastermind, meaning Abdullah, innovate, he will suffer a tremendous punishment.
So when you hear this verse, right, the first thing that might come to your mind is if you're struggling in a situation like this, how can something so painful possibly be good for me, and even if you're struggling with anything else, it doesn't have to just be people speaking ill of you, or thinking ill of you or anything like that. But any type of struggle, Allah's pantalla has this beautiful reminder right at the start hear that do not think that this is bad for you. Rather, it is good for you. So how can we find mercy within the hardship? This mental reframe is incredibly powerful whenever we're going through a struggle. And to remind ourselves that any test, any
difficulty that we go through is a test and any, the purpose of any test is to bring us closer to Allah subhana data. And so if something causes you to return to Allah,
to increase the diet, to reconnect with the Quran, to increase the giving charity, right to make amends with people anything like that, then it is absolutely good for you, even if it doesn't feel good, even if it's actually a very painful experience, how we deal with the experience, and whether it makes us closer to Allah subhana data determines whether there's good enough for us, right. And so in this particular situation, if somebody is speaking ill of you, then one of the good things that comes out of it is that you are protected from a further relationship with this person. Now that you've discovered what they're truly like what now that you've discovered their true colors,
you are now protected from further harm, because you're no longer going to entrust them with your vulnerabilities. You are also promised the expiation of sin, that there's going to be sins removed from you because of the pain that you're dealing with. And then also, if you can transform this into a gratitude, how a gratitude that you are not the one perpetuating such a devastating sin. And when you know the punishment of the sin, definitely feeling grateful that you know, even though I hate being the one talked about, even though this is incredibly painful, I am grateful that I'm not the one doing the talking, that I'm not the one spreading these rumors and this gossip and this
backbiting. And I'm not engaging in the sin of Hamdulillah. There was actually a man who told Hasson and bacillary Rahim Allah, that Hey, someone is backbiting about you. And so his response, I think, was so beautiful. Where he then proceeded to send a dish of sweet dates to the person who was backbiting against him. And he said to this person, I heard that you've given me your good deeds as a gift. So I want to repay you for it. But please excuse me because I'm unable to fully repay you. Subhanallah look at that attitude. And it's also quite, it's quite a burden, right? Like when you think about it, you know, the fact that he's, you know, thanking him for, you know, for, for his
good deeds, because he's keeping the big picture in mind. He's keeping the athlete in mind in terms of what is going to be best for me then. And if this person is backbiting against me, now, I might not enjoy it now. But I will be the one enjoying later. And so that's a beautiful, also a psychological reframe. That's very powerful. In the next verse, Allah subhanaw taala says, If only the believing men and women had thought well of themselves when they heard this rumor, and said that this is clearly an outrageous slander.
So here there are
have several action items to take into account. What do we do when we hear someone talking ill of someone else? What do we do in a gathering like that? And Allah Subhana Allah says, So first, you take note of here, what should be done when somebody's saying something negative, that it's not about the people who spread the rumors. This this particular area, but it's about the people who didn't think well of eyeshadow the lawn has. So Allah subhanaw taala differentiates between those two groups of people. Because there's a difference between just thinking to yourself, oh, I can't believe that, you know, this person, you know, this, this person did such and such thing and
everything and you think ill of them in your heart, versus thinking ill of them and then spreading it. Right that that's a two step process. But this verse shows the importance of not just not spreading the rumours, but also of having the best thoughts of one another. That that is what true brothers and sisters do in Islam is to have the best thoughts of one another. And so, in terms of action items, look at this, look at the beauty of this verse and the wit the phrasing of it, where Allah subhanaw taala said, that if only the believing men and women had thought well of themselves,
Lee and foresee him right be unfussy him that that if only they had thought well of themselves, not one another, themselves, that allowing for backbiting and the speaking and thinking ill of others, to be the norm, phrase deterioration in a society and it chips away at human decency, so that things become cutthroat rather than supportive of one another. This sense of community is so essential, right? And the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, he said that a servant does not cover the faults of another servant in this world. But that unless pancetta covers his faults on the Day of Judgment,
so covering the faults of one another, creates the sense of brotherhood and sisterhood that is so important in creating a solid foundation for our community. And so this is the directive that Allah's Pattana is giving us and what I think is so powerful about Allah saying that, why did they, why did they not think well of themselves?
When somebody thinks ill of someone else, it is truly a reflection of them more than it's a reflection of the other person. So when somebody thinks ill of you, or says negative things about you, it has much more to do with what's happening inside of them, then it has to do with you. And this verse is such a beautiful illustration of that, that they're not thinking well of themselves. And this is why they can think ill of somebody as amazing as I shadow the law, and
that this is a disease within themselves, and shortcomings within themselves. Right? If you are struggling with something, it's much easier to believe that same thing of someone else. Right? So action wise, what do we do, we take control of what we can, and we let go of what we can't, if you are doing your best by Allah subhanaw taala if you are doing your best and your relationships with people and to be good to one another, and then another person's opinion of you and their perspective of you, is much more of a reflection of them than it is of you. So don't pay too much attention to the things that they're doing or saying
in the following verse unless passata gives us more action items where he says, Why did they not produce four witnesses? Now since they fail to produce witnesses, they are truly liars in the sight of Allah.
So another action items when we hear something negative about someone else, asking myself, can I simply believe this negative thing to be true? Or is there a protocol?
When somebody spreads something? Who who these days produces for witnesses, oftentimes what is spread is actually something that another person didn't even directly see themselves. Right? They just heard it from somewhere, there was some sort of insinuation, right? And they didn't even see it themselves. And so so the to believe something like that, without for witnesses, like how many times do we even think about, oh, you know, Can I can I produce for witnesses to corroborate this? Nobody thinks that way. And it shows how important it is to find the truth, rather than to just spread what we hear. And so to believe something and to spread it as fact, without sufficient evidence, Allah's
cantata saying it's a lie. And Allah subhanaw taala labels people here as liars, and that's terrifying.
How often do we just engage in gossip and
And without and backbiting and even slander with absolute lies about people, not even thinking about it. And in the meantime, we are at risk of being written as liars. That That, to me is terrifying this verse I found to be very powerful when I read it. And it reminded me of a hadith of the results I sent him where he said that truth leads one to paradise and virtue leads one to Paradise, and the person tells the truth, until he is recorded as truthful amongst the truthful, and the person and a person, a lie leads to obscenity, and obscenity leads to the hellfire. And what's more obscene, right than spreading lies about our brothers and sisters. And then the person tells lies until he's
recorded as a liar. Right? So the way that we live our lives and what we do consistently, that is what dictates how we're going to be labeled. And we all insha Allah where, you know, we ask Allah Subhana Allah, to be from amongst those who are labeled as the truthful who are recorded as the truthful and hereafter. And so truth telling in this context, when people are sharing negative things about others, what does truth telling involve? It involves sharing the good, right? If you're in a gathering where people are speaking ill of someone, counteract it with the good try and stop it. Right, taking no joy in hearing bill about other people hearing about their struggles, taking no
joy in that, keeping silent when we can't say good defending our brothers and sisters and protecting them, and keeping them safe from our tongues. The Prophet SAW Selim was asked whose Islam is best. And he responded to those from those tongue and hand people are safe.
So asking ourselves, are people safe from my tongue?
Are people safe in confiding in me knowing that it won't go past us? Are people safe? That if they if if this person sees me doing something that looks a little bit iffy that they'll give me the benefit of the doubt? are our brothers and sisters safe from us and from our tongues? That's the action item and the question to ask ourselves.
In the next verse, After these admonishments, look at what ls has added, says, After all of this, you know, the strict admonishments and the threat of being labeled as liars, all those paths that I says, had it not been for Allah's grace and mercy upon you in this world and the Hereafter, you would have certainly been touched with a tremendous punishment for what what you plunged into. So here is again, another reminder of Allah's Mercy amidst his admonishments, it's like if any of you have children, and obviously the example illustrates that it is the highest and beyond comparison, but if any of you are parents of children, when they make a mistake, when they do something they're
not supposed to do, how do we talk to them about it? Right? We go and we tell them look, this, this wasn't right. You know, I know you I know. I know the goodness inside of you, and I am correcting you because I want good for you. Because I love you. And Allah's passata loves us more than we can imagine. And he wants good for us and helping us to stay away from this sin, from hurting our brothers and sisters in a way that would destroy our lives here and in the asset. This is a gift and a mercy that Allah Subhana Allah is giving us and so through his love, he's giving us these directions, which are meant for our good in this life and the next inshallah
and so then Allah's pancetta continues, and he says when you received it with your tongue, and said with your mouth so what you had no knowledge of taking it lightly while it is an extremely, something extremely serious in the sight of Allah.
I love the freezing of this verse where unless Pattaya says when you received it with your tongue,
it's very easy to say what you hear, especially in this day and age where there's so much misinformation everywhere. But what happens instead of receiving something with our tongues, we receive it with our hearts.
We receive it with our minds, what a difference that would yield.
Right thinking to yourself, What does this say about me if I immediately believe this to be true?
What happens to my dunya and akhira if I receive this with my tongue and immediately spread it?
You know, we live in a culture and society where it's so easily easy to talk about others, right? Like even when you're when you see celebrity tabloids for example, or, or shows or any type of news. So much of it, so much of the commentary about other people's lives, their outfits, their indiscretions, their mistakes, all of these things. It becomes fodder for everyone. It's it's where we're at
liberty to discuss everybody's lives as if it's not painful as if it's nothing. And the Internet has really perpetuated that. You There are so many teenagers and adults as well, but especially children and teenagers who have attempted and committed suicide, because of suffering from this, where one mistake is spread so far that they can never escape it. I remember a client that I had, who attempted suicide three times, because no matter what school she went to, the internet rumors would follow her until she was ostracized from every friend group, because of one mistake that she made one indiscretion. Right? And so now and that was an actual indiscretion that she committed. But does
she deserve to be armed in such a way? Absolutely not. So now imagine when somebody doesn't commit an indiscretion like that, like I showed on the lawn. And like these rumors, especially of a sexual nature are especially harmful, but they're so normalized. And so Allah's pancetta is reminding us that we shouldn't take this lightly, that it's serious to Him. And His is the standard that we should follow not what's normalized in society. And so all those parts that are gives us an action item in the next verse where he says, If only you had said upon hearing it, how can we speak about such a thing? Glory be to You, oh, Allah. This is a heinous slander.
And so this verse tells us how to receive it with our hearts and our minds rather than receiving this gossip with our tongues. And so with our minds here, illustrata saying immediately doubt it, instead of immediately embrace it.
The default should be that you say no, this is not true.
And that's how we embrace it with that's how we receive it with our minds. And now to receive it with our hearts to think, what would what would you want someone to do? What would you want someone to say? What would you want someone to think? If this was being shared about you? How would you want somebody to interpret this? If this was being shared about you, we always want people to give us the benefit of the doubt. But do we do the same for others?
And a beautiful action item we see in this verse is ALLAH SubhanA. Allah tells us to say, Subhanak, Glory be to You, oh, Allah. And why is this important? Is because when we hear gossip, we have the choice to fall into dunya mode, right, which is, oh, it's enjoyable to talk about other people, right? Like this is something that, that human beings from the beginning of time have struggled with, or we have the opportunity to fall into asset or mode, hereafter mode, where we remind ourselves of ALLAH SubhanA, WA Tada. And when we're mindful of him, then our choices change. So when we say Subhanak, Subhan Allah, right, Glory be to Allah, admiring his perfection, and reminding
ourselves of Allah when we're trying to change our status quo, that mindfulness is very, very powerful in making the right choice.
In the next verse, Allah subhana, Allah tells us that ALLAH forbids you from ever doing something like this again, if you're true believers, and I love this verse, because it shows that even if something is this severe, the door to Allah has never closed. You can always be a true believer, you can always make a change even after so if you're hearing this, you know these ideas and you're thinking man, like I, I really struggle with this, I really talk about people a lot i and catch yourself, right? You also might be thinking, you know, this is not really a personal struggle of mine. But all of us fall into this, like this is this is something so common.
But if you're feeling like how am I ever gonna get out of this, the punishment is so severe, realize that you can always make a change. So even after people spoke badly about one of the women of Jenna, one of the Mothers of the Believers, one of the most righteous people in our history, they can still be true believers, but change is necessary action is necessary. So never underestimate your ability to change or the Mercy of Allah subhanho data.
And then Allah Subhana Allah tells us how and the next verse, he says, and Allah makes his commandments clear to you, for Allah is all knowing, all wise. So now you know, like the commandments are clear. This is not okay to do. This is a very severe thing, even if people minimize it. This is actually a huge sin in the sight of Allah subhana data. Now it's clear and now once you know your mistake, you can fix it.
And the others pattern reminds us that He is all knowing all wise, that he that he's watching us, he knows what we do, and he knows when we try to make a change. My eldest pastor grant has all the clarity and the ability to make the choices that are most pleasing to Him.
And then.
And then last half hour talks about a different category of people, not the people who are willing to make this change. But instead he says, Indeed, those who love to see in decency spread among the believers will suffer a painful punishment in this life and in the Hereafter. And Allah knows and you do not know.
We, we all in our lives have encountered this person, the person who loves the drama, the person who loves like, every time they come in to a gathering, you won't believe it, you won't believe what happened, you won't believe what I heard, you won't believe what I saw. Right? And a lot of times people are naturally drawn to those people, because they bring excitement with them. And so ALLAH SubhanA, Allah tells us about people who love to see division amongst the community, people who love to see sin normalized, came spread, right? There are people who prays sinful things, and they make it seem exciting, and they love normalizing it. We see this really constantly, especially on social
media, right where one of our sisters, you know, takes off her hijab. Finally, she finally removed our hijab, or somebody finally started to date, or finally started to explore their sexuality or finally is starting to let loose, and they praise this as freedom.
Alright, so they love to see the sins normalized, and spread and spoken about and shared amongst people. And so we know the punishment that comes with this kind of spreading in the of these negative, this negative talk in the hereafter where the prophesy Salem told us that when he was on his night journey between Israel and Mirage, you said I passed by people who had metal hooks in their hands, and they were clawing at their faces and necks. And I said to Gibreel, Who Who are these people, and Gibreel Ali salaam, responded, these are the ones who eat the flesh of people and attack their honor.
It's so important for us not to be fooled, that being the life of the party, and having the juicy gossip, to share, and encouraging negativity and sin is worth more than our economic is worth more than our hereafter. And this verse really puts that into perspective for us. And in this life, too. What happens if you become that person? Where you might be the life of the party, right? Because you're constantly sharing things and talking about other people and you constantly are the one with your what do they say now? Drop the tea, right? Or pour the tea? I don't know. Younger people can tell me
something about building. Yes. Thank you. Thank you. I should have I should have researched that before I mentioned it but um
but yeah, spill the tea, right? Like this is a thing that that is encouraged. Like, okay, tell me all the gossip. Let me know everything that's that's happening. But it results in in a lot of damage to our hereafter and it also results in a lot of damage to our current life. Because it results in loss of trust and the destruction of relationships. It results in obsessing about other people, their lives, their perceptions, it results in discomfort and worries about well, what if they know that it came from me? What if they retaliate? It results in people not opening up to you or getting close to you. Because if you're willing to talk about them to someone else, then what makes that the
person that you're speaking to feel safe, that you won't do the same to them. Right so it's so important to put that into perspective. And then I'll just pass out a follows this like severe admonishment with a reminder where he says, um, if it had not been for the favor of Allah upon you and His mercy, we would have suffered. And because Allah is the most kind and the Most Merciful. So again, a reminder amidst the the commands and the admonishments and all of this, the redirection, Allah subhanaw taala reminds us of His mercy, where he called, he reminds us that He is the most kind, and the Most Merciful. And so this is really an emphasis that even though the sin of slander
and Backbiting is such a huge thing. The fact that it's such a it is such a huge thing is actually a kindness from Allah subhanho data and a mercy from Allah Spanner data. Because if we didn't know this, and we continue to engage in it, our relationships would be destroyed. We would be suspicious of those that we love, we would have no one that we could trust, we would lose the ability to trust and be vulnerable because we would be afraid of how it's going to be weaponized, how it's going to be used against us.
And then Allah subhanaw taala reminds us all believers and when we hear that when we hear that a verse starts with, you know, Old Believers Yeah, you will live
m&r We pick up and we listen right? He says do not follow the footsteps of shaitan. So not just do not follow shaitan but do not even follow his footsteps, taking any step in his direction, whoever follows the footsteps of shaitan then let them know that he surely bids them to a morality and wickedness and had it not again, look at this, it ends with with, again, this reminder, had it not been for Allah's grace and mercy upon you, none of you would have ever been purified, but Allah purifies whoever He wills. And Allah is all hearing and all knowing look at how many reminders, there are of Allah's times that His mercy, even though what the what so many in the community were
engaging in was something so hated by him. And it just shows us that His mercy is not conditional. And it is always accessible. And this time, he ties it to purification of ourselves, showing us that the ability to see good in others and to avoid hurtful talk is a mercy from Allah Subhana Allah, and it's a reflection of our own purity.
And so the action item we see here and not following the footsteps of shaitan is to remind ourselves, that shaytan is the one who's whispering to us to engage in gossip. He's the one who loves this. He's the one who loves to divide people. And so figuring out, you know, figuring out okay, how should I if I'm trying to get to me here, when we know that he's involved, it helps us to fight against his whispers. And then also, another action item we see in this verse is that the inclination toward gossip is really natural. But what does it say about the state of our hearts when we engage in it? How do you feel when you leave a gathering, where you've been chit chatting about
everybody else, and reminding yourself before you get into a gathering of people, especially people that you tend to kind of fall into this with?
Remind yourself, this is one of the tricks of shaitan and then Arm yourself, arm yourself with reminders of there are a few habits that that I think are very helpful. We're literalist SLM, reminds us that among the perfection of one's Islam is to leave What does not concern him.
Whatever you're saying about this person, that's not your business, right? It doesn't concern you. And so leave it and that you're step closer to perfecting your Islam.
Before you get into a gathering, remind yourself that the Muslim is the one who's tongue in hand, people are safe from so intentionally deciding, I'm going to be safe, I'm going to be a safe person, I'm going to be a Muslim, who so people are safe from my tongue. And then that also sort of also reminds us that whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him speak good or remain silent. And that's going to be my commitment. I get into this gathering. And I'm ready, I remember that I can only speak good or remain silent because I believe in Allah and I believe in the last day, right so and then at the end of this verse, Allah subhanaw taala reminds us of who he is, he says, Well law
who sent me on I'd him that he is the All Hearing the All Knowing that when we go into a gathering, reminding ourselves and being mindful of Allah's cantata in our daily interactions, because he sees and he hears, and he knows everything.
And then Allah subhanaw taala. He addresses the next verses, verse 22. And this one was specifically addressed to Abu Bakar, or the lawn or the Lord. And this was the father of Isha for the lawn. And this verse was revealed because he swore to end his financial assistance to one of his cousins who was poor, because his cousin was taking part in the rumors against Russia, or the law and, and so Allah Santana sent out this verse, and it says, Do not let the people of virtue or affluence among you swear to suspend their donations to their relatives, the needy and the immigrants in the Cause of Allah. Let them pardon and forgive, do not love to be forgiven by Allah. And Allah is all
forgiving, Most Merciful.
Imagine how hard it is for a father, to continue to financially support somebody who hurt his daughter,
and to continually offer to offer to continue to offer goodness to somebody who has offered pain. That is really, really intense. But this verse is so empowering. Because what does it tell us? It tells us don't allow other people to change who you are. Don't allow the things that other people do to change what you do.
It really it really shows us the power of ensuring that other people's actions don't determine who we are. That when you do good, your good deeds are for you. They're not for them. So even if somebody you feel someone is undeserving of them, it doesn't matter.
Because in the end, this is between you and Allah subhanaw taala it's not between you and this person. And so it's a really empowering reminder of that, Mashallah.
And then in the next few verses now, ALLAH SubhanA data, I want you to listen to these verses from the lens of if you are a person who has now been hurt by the words of others, if you are somebody who has been slandered if somebody has gossip or started rumors about you, Listen to these verses, and see what Allah subhanaw taala offers in a way, that is a helpful reframe and we're going to end with these last few verses inshallah. So, in verse 23, Allah says, Surely those who accused chased unsuspecting, believing women are cursed in this life and the hereafter, and they will suffer a tremendous punishment on the day that their tongues hands and feet will testify against them for
what they used to do.
The experience of having people speak ill of you. And having no control over this, having no control over your pain, or your reputation is extremely scary, and it can feel very disempowering. And then if you try to defend yourself, and it falls on deaf ears, it can really make you feel very hopeless. And so unless Pattaya provides this reassurance and reminder, that on the Day of Judgment, all of the lies that were said about you are going to be brought forth as lies, and that you will receive perfect justice. And in the end, they are the people who lie against you, the people who hurt you, they will defend you through your through their limbs, and their tongues. The same limbs and tongs
that caused so much pain to you here will be a source of solace there, because they won't be able to say anything but the truth. And so just like you felt that your life and your reputation and your pain were out of your control here, their bodies and their testimony will be outside of their control there. And it will lead to personal justice for you there.
When I read this verse,
I, I thought of how in psychology in therapy, one of the ways to help people through trauma is to help them rewrite the narrative because people experience trauma, when they feel powerless and helpless. And so the antidote to that is to feel supported, and powerful and empowered. And this verse does that, where you have a visualization of how to manage the impact of a traumatic experience in which people, people spoke so ill of you and damage so much of for you and your life and how you went through so much pain. And it allows you to shift from feeling powerless to feeling empowered and rewriting your story in your mind. And so it can be very helpful in the next verses as
well. We're Allah's paths that I says on that day, Allah will give them they're just penalty in full and they will come to know that Allah alone is the ultimate truth. And for us to know that the ultimate truth will always be victorious over the lives of people and to never doubt that. And so remembering when people speak ill of you that your priority is Allah Spano Tata, and he's on your side as you cope with this pain, and that his truth will come out and that His justice will prevail and it'll be perfect. And then finally Allah's passata ends this story by proclaiming the innocence of eyeshadow, the law and by saying wicked women are for wicked men and wicked men are for wicked
women. The virtuous women are for virtuous men and virtuous men are for virtuous women. The virtuous are innocent of what the wicked say. And they will have forgiveness and an honorable provision.
So taking comfort in the fact that Allah has that I seize all and his knowing of your struggles and your innocence is the most important of all, and then the action item that I want to leave you all with, if you have been through this kind of pain
in order to help you to move forward
is to know that your innocence is written above the seventh heaven, the seven heavens in in a way that even if you can't see it,
it will be proclaimed on the day when it matters matters most So even our issues or the lawn has innocence was proclaimed for all of us to see. But yours inshallah is being saved for you on a day when it's going to matter most. And then to ask yourself in terms of moving forward, sometimes we hold on to things because we feel like if we don't, it means that what they did was okay. But in reality asking ourselves, what would I be able to focus on if I wasn't holding on to this pain? If I wasn't struggling with these negative thoughts about this person who said these horrible things if I wasn't busy searching for the possible ways that that other people might be intending to hurt me?
Is it worth it? Are these thoughts helping me to get closer to Allah? subhanaw taala? Or what are they doing to my energy level? are they impacting me in my ability to worship to do my salah to recite Quran it is exhausting to hold on to negative thoughts and feelings especially when they're directed to people who are close to you if those are the people who have hurt you. And so reminding ourselves like Allah's pancetta reminded of a book by the law on who were let them part in and forgive. Would you not love to be forgiven by Allah and Allah is the most forgiving, the all Forgiving, the Most Merciful.
Forgiveness does not mean that what this person did was okay.
It means that this person has already caused me enough pain and moving forward allows me to free up valuable space in my mind, my heart and my life that could be used for something that's beneficial to me, instead of something that's detrimental to me. And so I ask Allah Subhana Allah to bless us with tongues that protect our brothers and sisters, minds that think of the best of one another, and hearts that are free of negativity toward one another and are always turning to us pancetta, Aloma, I mean, just second love fight. I mean, you know, but Allah means have had a lot, I have heard this story of the ethics like a few dozen times in my lifetime. And I'd like reflected on lectures this
and that. And there's something you pulled out there. So palaces or Sarbat, like set from you that, like my mind is you shouldn't I feel like I would just sit like really heavy in my chair and to think Subhanallah because even if you've not been in this exact situation, some of these lessons this this shift in perspective, to reframe this topic in a way that's really practical that's focused on healthy change, it's relevant in so many different contexts. So does that co occur? So that was amazingly beneficial? I know, there's some questions, I saw a couple were a little bit past time, but I want to take one or two. If I can find it, there's a lot of memes going on in the chat.
Mashallah. I know, somebody was asking, along the lines of, is it best to like refute? If someone's, if there's gossip going on? Is it best to refuse those allegations? Or do you just stay quiet, and you leave it to a lot to sort out for you? So one of the things that I tend to do, if I noticed the conversation, heading, you know, in that in that direction, is I try to bring something positive about that person up, you know, where it's just like, you know, yeah, I know, sometimes that's a struggle for them and everything. But you know, one of the things is that they always step up, if I call them and I need something, they will 100% Drop what they're doing, and they will be there and
everything. So I will, I will try to bring up a compliment about them. And it naturally shifts the conversation toward the good, because, you know, people kind of sometimes it just people don't realize that they're doing this, right. And so sometimes a very subtle reminder of like, oh, let me let me change the mindset a little bit and the direction of the thoughts. And sometimes that's just really enough to shift to help people shift gears. That's really crucial. I think it's I think it's part of what what this talk really reminded me of, I feel like this is a learned behavior. And it's very, very, like common in our culture, it's even more so I don't know if it's COVID we had nothing
to do but talk or just to have these canceled culture blast videos on Tiktok. And to something about and this reality TV mindset of like finding entertainment and spreading false truths and making stories and getting, you know, some highlights it's one of the dangers was like, It's not this overt haram, you don't think about it openly. But it becomes so common and bait unfortunately, it permeates our own circles as well. May Allah forgive us. There's a few questions that were sent privately. I'm trying to see if there's anything that's short enough.
Someone's asking what happens to the ones that don't back bite, but are the ones that sit and listen when Backbiting is going on? Are they just as bad as their company?
You know, a low item, right?
But the way I like to think about it is if somebody was talking about you, in that situation, and you knew that somebody you trusted just sat there and heard it, what would that what would that be like Wouldn't that still feels like a betrayal, it obviously isn't to the same level as being the person who's spreading it and saying it, but at the same time, it's still very, very hurtful, it's still very, very hurtful. And, you know, I think that, you know, one of the things if you can't stop it, you know, then then leave, then leave the leave the gathering, because, you know, we know that that the angels are not going to be in a gathering like that, and we don't want to be in, in in a
gathering that might be receiving punishment of Allah subhanaw taala and, you know, the Oh, and somebody actually quotes a verse, a verse here that has the response. So let's, you know, make sure to look into that in sha Allah. But but it's really you know, Allah cantata, like themselves SLM said, that when we see something wrong, as a believer, we have to try and change it with our hand. And if we can't, we change it with our tongue, and if we can't, then we hate it in our heart, but that's the weakest of Amen. And so, you know, hating it in your heart is something but if you truly hate something or you
Still gonna sit there and just be a part of it. Right. So that's something to, to really to really gauge and to ask ourselves
beautifully, such as that Kamala Harris's fissara Thank you so much for the time that you've given us in this community and yes, someone said it in the chat as well as mashallah you can see the preparation behind this talk. And if you want to benefit more from the sisters are as content I know she has a lot of contributions. Three again, Institute sorry, is there anything coming up that you can kind of leak or mention I saw mentioned of a book that's come out? Let us know what's going on in the world. So I'm handling the trauma series that I co wrote for European is it going to be published as a physical copy
in the summer which I'm so excited about Michela but it is accessible completely for free on champions website under books
insha Allah I am starting to I'm starting to brainstorm another course for a matter of Institute which I'm really really excited about. I haven't gotten started on the actual recordings yet or even the full fledge preparation yet but it's going to be underway in sha Allah and then with European another thing that I'm working on CO writing a parenting series of parenting resilient children series and that's going that's on his way home. So Allah you're busy busy busy, I shot let me Alexa elephant bark and your time for those who don't know I know you're active or you have been active on Instagram at SARS with on therapy
as much as you can try to keep up with her insha Allah there's amazing work and of course we have our class inside out outside it with a Maghrib it's not open right now but she co taught at mashallah western farmers cinnamon, and Chicama Hussain who you guys will see inshallah tomorrow but exactly like her sister Sorry, that was an amazing talk we cannot wait to continue benefiting from you in shell for years to come we will accept from you and your family I mean, you know, but I really mean and you have a blessing and accepted last 10 nights of Ramadan for now take care of us and I'm gonna go after the language.
I'm gonna get to just back on my feet everyone awesome sauce, just cycle up everyone for your comments as well and your contributions. I was like I was having trouble reading and scrolling in the chat at the same time you guys were just gem after gym after gym. I'm glad everyone felt really connected to this topic. There was a lot of personal I know, difficulties and pain that some of you shared and message privately Milla make it easy for all of you, and anyone who's experienced any kind of injustice. I mean, you know, but that I mean, now I do want to transition because this is going to be I know a great reflection session with Dr. Mohamed Hakim as well and just like military,
Dr. Mohammad you know sometimes you do the shift exacto knife thing where it's like, you know chapter this this every time we have a question you have a response, right? Do you have something from the Quran prepared martial arts of Vedic Allah? How are you doing this that I'm wanting and when I bought it from salam ala I'm doing great hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah balmy, the Quran always keeps us for Allah He there's life in the Quran, there is a spirit in the Quran. And this community has, well I this Ramadan is different with this community. hamdulillah really is it really, really is. And we're so grateful to have you as part of it. And with that being said, I know that we're
tight on time, and I'm sure there's a lot to cover. So I'm going to pass it over to them so we can keep
this Milan handled under sort of version nine. Let me start with something that really mesmerizes me in this chapter and this discussion about the ACA, the rulings of backbiting, slander, controlling your tongue, preserving the identity and the dignity of your sisters and brothers and the community. Why in the world the sewer was the sewer named Stuart and nor the sewer of the light the sewer at the chatter of the light sorta nor, yes, the first answer is that all what you read and the scholarly opinions is that there is a beautiful area this is there is a very spiritual and serene, magnificent area. Talking about area to note, as somebody mentioned, Allah Who knew somehow that you
will not Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth. And that is basically According to some scholars, the most commented area in the Quran, like there's so much commentary, there's so much depth here. There's so much reflection, there's so much spirituality in this area. But this area is does not come in a vacuum does not come to note is not only about the idea of the node, there is a lot of introduction there is how digital ethic does the introduction, the beginning of the server is very firm sutra and Zelda Wofford once
you get in by you that this is a Surah that we revealed. And we have ordained and we have put in it clear signs. So the idea is that
when we hear about all of these rulings about Xena and fornication and the punishment, the severe punishment, notice how Allah subhanaw taala wrapped all of that to be in the Surah of light and the surah of Vinod. Why do you guys think this is important? What is the reflection? Why is this profound? Subhanallah
Oh, okay, I see there's some reflections says that Hafsa Can you help me mashallah, there's a lot of great content, please, please make sure that you document those, and the telegram chat, so that we have it. Does anyone want one want to tell us? Why would this command where is the light and this commands basically,
to write in our own light, our own node, all of these things present the door of the heart of the heart, beautiful, beautiful. There is the node which is the Quran, one generic of neuron bobina. And there's this darknesses that could happen in our lives that could block that Nora from coming to us as Imam Malik told Imam Shafi Rahim Allah to Allah in the Allah, Alka alayka Nora, Allah subhanaw taala has given you light, which is the light of the revelation, which is the light of knowledge for Allah to treat who behold metal, Marcia. So do not extinguish that light with the darkness of the sin. SubhanAllah. So yes, the issue of sexual temptations and desires and the temptation to talk
about the reputation of others is so juicy Subhanallah It's so tempting, but all of this could result in a lot of darknesses could really distract us from the light of Allah subhanho wa taala. And that's where the surah came with this beautiful command. Now, let me
Okay, so
what's interesting when you hear about a society of light, which Tama undoer it's a community we all know that the community of the Sahaba is the best community it's the best generation that was brought after to mankind contemplado leanness, and Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam told us final Caroni Kearney, from Medina, yo Luna Home Show Medina, you don't know that the best generation are my generation and then those who follow and then those who follow. But you see that when you hear about machinima and load a community of light, you might assume that this community does not make sense. You might assume that this community is like the utopian city with no mistakes that's
protected, that does not fall into these things. But hey, we're reading about the flaws that took place in the community. Let me let me let me start with a very interesting area and this sort of this passage.
So,
number 11, Allah subhanaw taala is telling the believers in Alladhina Jaya who will ftrs button MIPCOM, they are the ones who brought up this slander or a group of you they are among you, let us face it, let us not sugarcoat it, let us okay, there is somebody who led all of this, while Lolita will like Ibrahim, in whom the one who started all of this he specifically Abdullah and Raymond saloon will get a severe punishment. But let us face the fact that they are painful, righteous people among the sahaba. among the companions of the prophets, Allah Salah who ended up being carried by this lender and they actually transmitted this lender, maybe sometimes out of good
intentions, maybe they think they are warning, maybe they think they are advising this area is telling us that if you want to live in a society of light, if you want to live in a community where the light of Allah subhanho wa Taala prevails, make sure that there are commands that are restrictions, those restrictions, they may seem to limit our freedom. However, these restrictions are for the better because they will allow the light of Allah to prevail upon Allah. So now we are going to ask the following questions. How did Allah what are the commands, what are the restrictions? What are the safety mechanisms that Allah Subhana Allah has put in surah. To note in
order to keep the light in the community and to extinguish the darkness of sins? What are the safety mechanisms? And if you think about the Subhanallah, the, the Hadith that will effect the incidence of ill effects of the slander of say the eye Isha Allah subhanaw taala revealed rulings not only to declare the chastity of sad Aisha, he declared a whole bunch of rules and regulations and commands and safety mechanisms to protect the community so that the community is protected from everything that relates to reputation, slander, Zina, fornication, it's a big Surah Subhan Allah, it's a huge set of commands. Let us try to explore them one by one. Somebody raise their hand this Allah
so the hand goes up, and then it went down and just in case it was an accident, you guys want to try raising again.
There we go. I see for example.
Just last year for giving the chance again and again. I love to talk
Love to reflect. The thing is that whenever I read surah, no one example comes into my mind that is of the sun, whenever the sun is in front of you, or the latest in front of you, the shadow is always at your back. Or whenever you keep the sun at your back, the shadow is always ahead of you like this landers, the world, the desires, the sins and everything make you follow them. Or whenever the light was there, the new race there, Allah is there, the commands are there, the dues are there, and you stay away from the don'ts, then Subhanallah everything that's negative, everything that's haunting you everything that's terrible for you, that set you back your back. Like it sort of tries to fool
you, but it cannot capture you, it cannot be above you. So you just keep the light in front of you a lie in front of you the book in front of you sooner in front of Inshallah, everything's going to be perfect.
Sort of Rosanna. So let's have a look at this a very profound reflection. Now there's a lot to say about specific terms. So let's try to really find the gems from the get themselves remember, we are trying to put our reflection goggles on and try to search the passage with a specific question. And the question here has a Allah is telling me this area that it may be hard on me to apply there is light, there is no describe and it's so beautiful. Again, I'm not dismissing that, that beautiful reflection, just the relative smella.
So in order to avoid if Surah to Note comes with a lot of rules and regulations for us to follow lowering the gaze, knocking on doors, going at certain hours to visit people, you know, go into the neighbors and it's okay to visit brothers and aunts and uncles and different people wearing hijab like there's so many different angles that are given to us and all these are to deter you from falling into something like this. No beautiful Do you want to do you want to comment on one of these rulings?
Which I will Yeah, whatever I get that mentioned so you mentioned for example, up sorry.
Beautiful.
Yeah, yeah.
So to lower the gaze and don't reveal your beauty except that which is known to know Subhanallah is that when we look at their famous about hijab, so there are two that discussed modesty for men and women and the Quran. For women. It's important to note that in Surah, Allah has up and this is the area here is mentioned in the context of the whole passage. Again, we have to understand this area by itself is a beautiful area. It's a very detailed about the dress code for women and who should be who can see their serve their beauty or not Silla beauty, but also this is an this area is a part of a complete package for the society that will protect it's upon Allah and one of my favorite
reflections on this area is the area before so Allah subhanaw taala is telling the believing woman while the retina beholder, hidden knowledge will be hidden, let them cover their hairs with their headscarf. However, again, this area does not exist in a vacuum. The Quran is a set of complete instructions. Look at the idea before Allah subhanaw taala talk to men before he talked to a woman Subhan Allah Allah told the living men hold little mini dome in our sorry him while you have photo photo don't tell the believing men to lower their gaze and lower and guard their chastity. This is purely for them in Allah below the milestone, Allah subhanaw taala is aware of everything that they
are doing everything that is in their heart. So that command for sisters to have immodest dress code and lifestyle started with a command to brothers to make sure that they are lowering their gaze and notice how Allah is telling us also, yeah, how do men up for him to lower it's not captured in the translation, let them lower a part of their gaze, which is the lustful part. I know that sometimes we have these discussions when it comes to engaging in a workplace or talking to the opposite gender. And some of us have this awkward moment where we don't know how to carry ourselves. Actually our brother, a new Muslim brother revert was in the masjid last week. And he saw assisted and he
said Salaam Alaikum. And he was very casual. He didn't know any better and he was faced by a lot of rejection almost from the other sister and the other and the other community members. They thought he was rude just because they said salaam to the sister. So sometimes this boundary boundary line between what is modest and what is not is not clear because it's not it was not crystal clear ambition.
Yeah, it depends a lot on the culture some cultures are more open than others Subhan Allah so Allah and the Quran clearly is saying for Linwood, Medina, Yahoo, Nene up sorry. So let them lower a part of their gaze. Let them let let them make it clear to the sisters, that when I'm engaging in the conversation with the opposite gender, I am not here for any other lowly, you know, intention your whole domain applauding him. Once the community knows that we are not Subhanallah
we are not trying to have this temptations and this looks that could become lustful, it becomes easier for the sisters to understand, hey, you know what, it's easier because everyone is lowering their gaze. Now hijab is easy. So brothers, when we talk about hijab or the sister side, let's make sure that we help them by lowering our gaze again, a lot of safety mechanisms. And this Surah Surah is the sort of the light for our community to protect us and guard our chastity Subhanallah any other lights, any other commands, so lunch, you want to share some reflections from other from other parts of the ayat
from the first idea from Isaiah 11, when Allah says, Let us Abu Shara lagoon, it's easy to get overwhelmed when things are not going well, especially like this dramatically. We need to like look beyond the difficulty to see that in this thing also is higher because Allah has put higher and everything is not created anything purely evil. Now Subhanallah Subhanallah, one of my teachers actually the comments on this very idea that the sister shared that I suppose Sharon Lacan, well who are higher on Lacan, that the idea of slander on say, the Aisha was severe on even the believers themselves, not only say the Ayesha and her family, the whole community, they were like, people were
surprised that this knifes, this this human soul, without any restraints, without any commands, without any rules and regulations, we can go we can be very cruel, we can be very violent with each other, we can reach panela, a lot of extreme cases where the villa, this is a panela remind me about a story that had to happen with a brother in one of the communities in the United States, that brother Subhan Allah, He was married, and he made some wrong choices, where that led him to be in the presence with another woman in public. And subhanAllah I'm not defending him he was that was a wrong choice. And he admitted to me that he did a mistake, he did not manage that properly. The
problem is, some other brothers saw him and they took pictures and they Subhanallah circulated the pictures everywhere, everywhere. And this ended up not only destroying his marriage, but his relationship. He acknowledged that he was mistaken, he messed up, he did not manage this very well. But what is painful for him as he was looking back when he told me that other brothers when they saw him when they when he was exposed, they told him they were kind of happy because that brother was involved in the community he was trying to do youth groups and activities and and what have you, and they thought that they those who exploit him told him that we thought that you are better than us,
but now it looks like you are like any of us. So Subhanallah this idea that some people may have that
they have this thirst to prove that others are sinful so that they are trying to sedate whatever conscious or the remaining part of the clutches they have to Pamela it's it is sad. It is sad when people have this assumption and that's why this is again our safety mechanism. Lola isn't ready to move to London what we know now we'll move on to be enforcing him Hydra that sister Sarah Mashallah. Yeah, she she, she really explained this strongly that we should have good assumptions. The first reaction when we hear something bad about a brother or a sister is to accuse the one who's narrating the news, not the other person. Subhanallah This is a reflection of who we are not who the other
people are. Actually, a scholar scholars mentioned this beautiful comment, they say lobotomize Hera Li salamati balcony, that the believer searches for the excuses of others because of the purity of their heart. While ownership you have to look over YouTube, the whole tree balcony, and the hypocrite searching for others mistakes due to the wickedness of their heart. So again, the way we behave the way we react to Allah and every time we hear us every time we hear about someone's reputation, just I want us to understand, we are being checked our inner side our true nature is being under test. So
Panel, Pamela Maryam again we are trying to search for the for the sources of light and Desura the sources of light may be uncomfortable, we the sources of light and the surah Allah subhanaw taala extending US Letter Cebu Sharla can we might assume this is strict on us. This is hard on us. But again, the sources of light are nothing but clear and new for us, Maria villa.
So, Michael, why not Allah, what stood out to me was the first and second
because it reminded me of like science, for example, bacteria, they can't grow in certain environments. So the first Surah tells you that these rulings are obligatory, which means that it won't allow you, they won't allow you to grow in this environment like the Muslim community. And the second one says, Give each one of them are 100 lashes. So if people cannot grow, people will not do this thing, if they know that this is for example, the consequence, it just doesn't build. The community will not be built in
a negative manner. And this brings north to people's hearts and to the community as a whole. Now Subhan Allah exactly like her sister. So the idea here is that Allah subhanaw taala has made the punishment for Xena very severe as then it was Danny Frederick rucola adamant that it's a very severe punishment. However, Allah subhanaw taala made the conditions to apply the punishment also very hard to find low leisure Oh Allah, he'd be out of it. shahada look at this eye on number four, well Lavina your moon and masa Natty, those who have used chaste woman of adultery. Some of them yet to be out of it shahada, and they fail to produce four witnesses. According to the scholars, these
four witnesses have to see and I'm going to be a little bit explicit here, they have to see the actual sin, the actual activity of fornication, which is almost impossible to happen unless this sin is meant to be in public. Right. And throughout our Muslim history, this condition has never been applied according to my knowledge. According to my own research, this condition of somebody bringing
those who committed adultery, adultery or fornication to brought them to court, nobody was able to bring four witnesses who saw the actual thing. Most of the cases that were brought to court were people who confessed their sins, and they came to purify themselves. This is a condition that's very hard to apply. And this condition makes it harder on people who want to accuse others of adultery, and fornication Subhanallah and notice how ALLAH SubhanA wa Taala ordained the punishment for the Zina 100 gelada 100 lashes, but speaking about someone with Zina is at Nash's femenina delta. So it's like 80% of the actual punishment, again, honoring and really protecting the chastity of all of
our brothers and sisters, especially women, especially our sisters. Which takes me to another reflection I really wanted. I can't wait like it's it's one of those amazing things in the area. So you guys ready? smella show me the thumbs up if you're ready. Lola if semi auto run me know and I will Mina to be enforcing him Clara. So Allah Subhana Allah is telling the believers,
why don't you think assume good about themselves and sister Sarah shared a lot of reflections about this. However Allah, Allah could have said rather than me noona
Allah could have said lovely as a matter more who will not be enforcing a law that believers will assume good about themselves. And this will suffice right? Allah could have said that believers in general and the believers includes men and women. However, Allah subhanaw taala said the believing men and believing woman should assume good about themselves, because the accusation of the slander of aliphatic took place about a man and a woman Subhanallah so sometimes Allah Subhana Allah is very brief and this is Bella the Valletta is when you when you when you convey the term was very brief, simple language, right? But sometimes Allah will expand Allah will add words that could actually may
seem that it is redundant and ultimately there is no redundancy in the Quran. It is the surah actually is telling us about a event that took place a conversation that took place in the house of one of the Sahaba valuable I'm sorry and OMA you.
May Allah be pleased with them. Both of them, don't. They heard the news of
I Isha, the standard of Ayesha Allah I'm here. They, uh, you've asked them a yo, yo ma you. Do you hear what people are saying about Asia rather lOn? And she said yes, this is this is this is terrible, terrible news.
And then he asked her, if you were an artist as an artist, she has shoes. Would you do what she did? And she said, Well, no, I would never do that. If I was the wife of the Prophet SAW Salem. So are you told by Sharon monkey? I Isha is better than you and she will not definitely do that. And then she told me Well, you've asked her husband, if you were in the place of one. Would you ever dare to approach the Mother of the Believers, the wife of the Prophet SAW Salem? And he said, Well, I will never do this. And she told him first off, one pyromania look at how Subhanallah this is, this is a very elevated, this is a very
eloquent way of responding that okay, I know that Brother Mohammed, and also Sarah Aisha, and also Sarah, she is better than me, instead of waiting for others to sin, so that's what we start doing and slandering them type someone someone raise their hand.
So lunch?
Yes, I just wanted when you said earlier about how without these rules, we could be so cruel to one another. It just reminded me I want to mention this because other people might not most other people don't have this experience. But before I was Muslim, I was an atheist, and it was hugely burdensome to come up with my own fair code of living. And when I found the Quran, I found a manual for living, which is perfect justice. And it was such a relief. It's such a blessing upon us that we have full guidance in this Quran, from the creator of the human being the one who has perfect knowledge, wisdom and justice, and the Quran and all its rules. There's no doubt at all that this is federal
law and we need to never forget that
point Allah panela. Does that sound like a very profound reflection? If you can, please do us a favor and write some reflections about your experience with these commands that could be harsh on someone but you are saying this, this commands are really the true light for me. If you can read some reflections, especially on prayer and reflect, I'm sure many people will find this useful, especially those who are born into Islam. Where does that come about here?
Okay, tight Subhanallah I want to ask another question, just as okay. So, again, we mentioned the philosophy, the ending of the Egad and one of the ways to identify, you know, the board is to look at the philosophy that I get. So Allah subhanaw taala mentions the word Aleem four times in this passage, what are those four times?
I'll leave I'll lean again repetition a lot of repetition are We madly him as lean or lean? What are those four times? Can someone tell us
no tremendous magnificent.
So now do you want to
share
so we have a 11. Okay. Somebody is writing in the comments we have 11 Well, let me tell Kubra home in home law who either but Navin so the first time Allah mentions our lien that the one who started all of this, the mastermind Abdullah will have a severe punishment, which means that hey, this is a big yes, some people are forgiven, but someone will be held accountable. And whoever is held accountable, we're talking about a severe punishment. The next one is also verse 14. Well, first of all, like Alikum warahmatu for dunya when I feel like lemme second femur fee either, alim. Allah protected you with these eight that Allah subhanaw taala protected you from falling into sin,
otherwise, you'll have one to Azov, all the severe punishment. And guess what? Allah subhanaw taala we know that one of his name is allowing for this neuron bigger allows him the magnificent. So our scholars tell us that Allah Alavi, when he tells us about something, that's our dream, that's magnificent, then it is definitely something magnificent, you know, and they give an example. Imagine a little child, a little child who might tell you that I have a big amount of money as a huge amount. I collected a lot of ideas in my head. So you look at that child and he tell you okay, what is that big amount of money, it could be $10 $20 Maximum $30 Because for that child, the big
amount of money is relative is relative based on his or her own life and circumstances. However, if a rich person is a multimillionaire is going to tell you I'm gonna write you a big check. The same word big check means different things based on who this expression is coming from. So if a rich person versus a little child
Each one is telling us the same word that means different thing. Allah subhanaw taala Aleem Allah the magnificent when he tells us there is other Bonavia we better take it seriously. Let my second female, configure other banali and here's the area I have 15 That tells us somebody also mentioned this is gonna hold the XFINITY calm, water cooler gonna be FYE calm my laser like on the realm, when you take the news directly to your tongues, and you just iterate with your word with your mouth, that what you don't have any knowledge and, and Allah says water Sabu Hagen and you take it lightly, this is an area Subhanallah that should make us really be concerned and scared, scared about any
sin, any mistake, that we may be little that we may not Subhanallah assume to be magnificent to what the Buddha who Hainan Oahu and hola here Alvim and it is very serious. Allah Allah Allah is telling us while Juan de la Hey Arlene, I remember one of my early series on YouTube. It was Don't belittle the little. Don't belittle religion. And this was one of the areas that really is profound that sometimes
our scholars tell us law firms or the law several months ago or whatever may have been under Illa Islam human eyesight, do not look at a saint whether the sin is a major sin or a minor sin. Look at the magnificent of the one you disobeyed which is Allah subhanho wa Taala whoa and Allah I'll be him again. Make sure that again, Allah subhanaw taala and 16 Well hola it's an honor to move a call to my Hakuna and medical Namibia had Subhanak ahead. Turn on alim, the Glory to Allah. This is a serious and hideous slander again, the more we understand that our words could send us into the agenda into the fire. Allah Subhana Allah Allah told instructed Calif caribou Kelly Martin the Hello
drum in as well he sometimes one word that may come out of someone's mouth might destroy them into the fire Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us in a hadith in a racial layer called Kelemen min Sati lai lai Yuki La Bella Amen might say a word out of Allah has anger and wrath, without again without understanding without appreciating the massive nature of that word, that will be infinity Jahannam Subang in a hurry for one word, could cause someone to fall 70 years into the fire again, let us be careful about what we say what we hear. And whatever language we hear so Paula, but Okay, let's look at
let's look at the other safety mechanisms. Again, the surah is loaded with safety mechanisms. I know sister had mentioned some of them, but I really want us to look back on solar node, the chapter of the light and see how Allah subhanaw taala protected the community from crossing the boundaries of Allah shirani Mala
Salaam Alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh weejuns aka Lucia qualicum said I'm not going to love so I just wanted to like share and I Efrain this chapter so I know where Allah says, you know, Allah will excuse my OMA for I'm in the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said about that, you know, that Allah will excuse my OMA for anything that occurs to their mind, so long as they do not speak about it or act upon it. So, what I wanted to actually share a lot of time, you know, we have like a kind of Tod that is kind of not very good, like unsuitable Todd talks about someone right, insinuated into our mind and imagination by obviously shaytaan right. And what we should do as a reminder here
is that we should not speak about that because we will not be accountable for what comes to your mind, I mean, we should take time to reflect upon to ask this question is just like just an imagination, is this like an assumption? Or did I kind of go and check with him that person, you know, because this is like, so common, you know, in and not only about related to this particular particular issue, like slandering, but like on a daily basis, we do that we kind of make an assumption about something and we kind of try to impose on people, our children's, you know, saying, Oh, you did that because you had more you wanted to do that, or you I'm not asking but actually kind
of, you know, imposing a statement about him and not listening to him clearly, you know, and that way, it is just like, so infuriating for that child or for that person. I mean, this is like psychologically so, so, I would say you know, distracting, so, we have to be careful about that like the previous is, you know, do not follow what is what you do not actually know, right. So, so I think we need to kind of start making this common like asking question before we actually, you know, give a statement about someone or something
thinking we need to go and check with that person and not respond to everything that comes to our mind or imagination by Shetland. May Allah preserve this, I mean the Allah and Subhan Allah, first of all, really the idea that that resonates is that this a couple of collimate. And for him that Allah subhanaw taala is telling us what a terrible word that came out of their mouth, meaning that the problem is not that the short cross their mind, the problem is that this word came out of their mouth Subhanallah however, how can we protect ourselves from even going into the word being uttered is to protect the sword, and this is where the idea here is important. Done? Well, enough to enforce
the Hydra. The first safety mechanism is to kill the shot is to try to bury the shot the ill the illusion of someone tried to bury it from the get go SubhanAllah. Okay, beautiful. What are other safety mechanisms? How did Allah subhanaw taala protect a community from falling into Zina? And the single brothers or sisters out there? Come on this area is one of the beautiful areas that actually give guidance about you know, protecting the chastity of our young ones. Brothers and sisters, lowering their gaze. Yes, of course. There's actually another one. So again, Islam is giving a complete way of life. It's a complete system. Yes, people fall into the inner because when the Haram
is available, and when,
when, when there's an issue out of the fascia, but also there is also another way to protect from falling into the Haram which is to facilitate marriage Subhanallah
this is again, the idea about facilitating marriage is insecurity No, as well. Allah says, well, NPTEL aim i mean come was slightly him in a radical way it can marry all of those who are single, whether they are free, whether they are enslaved, you know, marry them, allow them to marry facilitate marriage. And you might say but they don't have the finances I'm assuming that they have the I have something you know, we have something to start their life together Inshallah, Allah is saying Unto Allah, He every single brother, every single family that started they have, they are living example of this area. A coup Cara, you will need him Hola, hola, Min fugly. If they were
poor, if they were starting in a financial difficulty, you can name them Hola, hum and fugly wala who has their own I mean, because again, so Allah is telling us telling us, one of the ways for them, to have a society of flight is to really facilitate marriage is to make them work the ovary to make it accessible, is to enable institutions and enable ways for young men and young one young woman to get to know one another in a very respectful way and to allow Subhanallah and to encourage them because if the halal is easy, is hard, and the Haram is easy, then what do we expect Subhanallah type?
Okay.
I think somebody mentioned also 2727 Yes, this is one of the ayat Subhanallah
actually
the the talk about event and taking permission it's
Subhanallah
let me just find the I get
all I can't find it but there's an idea that talk about basically how the
maybe in the at the end of the surah talks about
listed in common Larina molucca de Monaco well Lavina let me lol Hello masala.
Oh, there you go. I guess 58 Subhanallah I blanked here. So this is again one of the safety mechanisms that will protect from falling from exposing nakedness. Especially when it comes you know, remember back in the days they would have small houses and there might be no locks for the bedroom. And this is again the Quran is even is controlling is Islam is instructing us how to control the traffic and movement inside you our own families. So that you know if we have kids who are maybe Latina, Latina, America, America Latina and then we have global film income who are close to the age of puberty,
who can identify their attack at the age of Tamizh. They can identify when you know, a male from a female and they can identify they can sense when there's some you know intimately
Relationships happening Allah subhanaw taala is telling clear i and the Quran, let them take permission before they enter the bedroom of their parents because again so that they don't see inappropriate situations between the father and the mother. Again, this is one over the yet in the Quran to protect our children from being exposed to something that they are not ready to be exposed to Subhanallah a lot of beautiful disruptions in this era. If anyone has any final thoughts about sort of the nor the light of the community and how Allah subhanaw taala is enabling the light through these sections, feel free to share inshallah.
Oh, sure. I mean, go ahead. Real quick, Mila, I'm sorry, I didn't notice the time. It just like a long hair again. So I just wanted to, like quickly share about the idea where Allah talked about, you know, his physique. You know, I don't remember the exact HIA. Because, I mean, you know, was the eye and none of you would have been like, you know, it's the fuzzle of Allah, you know?
Can you please show me the IOPS? Yeah, I'm going there. Yeah. I was the chemical man I hadn't ever done.
Yeah, what's, so what I was thinking about is like, you know, this is like, a very powerful reminder for each one of us, like those who are saved from any kinds of sense, you know, be it, you know, be it like, any kind of sense, like backbiting or, you know, like Cofer and schicke, and all kind, all kinds of should be it like, you know, major or minor, we have to be very mindful, it's not because we are, you know, kind of doing a very good job. It's only because of Allah subhanho wa taala, you know, hasn't been physically rugby. And that is why we should not actually, you know, look down on people who are not doing well. And we should not be thinking about like, Oh, my God, did they have
no slime in their life? And did this, you know, they committed this, they are always backbiting they're always gossiping, and kind of, you know, thinking low of them. And, in fact, we have to be thankful to Allah that we are not among those people, right, this metal fee level. And there's something interesting this that after this, I'll let immediately said, you know, what,
I mean, do not follow the footsteps of shaitan running a lot of town and share plans tells us that okay, that's a good job. You know, Pat, on your back, you did a good job, you just attended a oran reflection program, and not everybody in you know, at your home is doing that. So probably there's something, you know, like, you know, you are some special but that's actually not true, this is a way of shaytaan approaching from from, you know, probably what do we call that, you know, the front side, you know, like Shannon said, that he will try to misguide in all different ways coming from, you know, back and forth. And so this is one way of shaytaan kind of, you know, making us believe
that there's something so special about us, which is
Subhanallah, you reminded me, brother SubhanAllah. So, let me tell you a very common scenario we have in our community, sometimes you see a young man, young woman, they start interacting with each other, more than what they need to, and you try to give them advice, brother and sister, just be careful, because we know that Subhanallah temptations are high. And you are, there's no way you will get married anytime soon. Bla bla bla. So we try to give them advice. And then that normally action is Brother Mohammed. So you don't trust us. And that's always you know, parents or community leaders, we are being accused that we accuse him that we don't trust others, you know, that we have,
we're assuming the intentions of others. And I'm getting to see how I did not accuse them. I'm just I'm being asked, so you don't trust us. So I tell brother, such and such and such a such and such, I trust you. But I don't trust the shaitan
I trust you. But I cannot guarantee that the shaitan is there. So that's one thing and in line with what you said is like a locker type. For example, I can make it quick because we're over time. I know. It's been an engaging session. But sister Hafsa May Allah word her she's, she's leading all of these sessions every single day and we need to really make sure that we respect everyone's time, but yeah, Bismillah Farzana Bismillah
Yes, I would like to reflect on the worst I suppose it's 22 a portion of it when Allah says Well, yeah, who will? Yes who Allah.
Allahu Rahim. You know what Allah loves the most is being merciful and being forgiving. Whatever happened in the life of Abu Bakr Zilla, and he was supporting someone and he was the one who really spread that thing. Things happen again, this was like Allah Allah is showing us that that was not an ideal society that they were like very price and not a single wrong thing will happen to them. And this is not a guarantee that a single wrong thing cannot happen to you. Things will come again in your life and things will be harsh for you. But what is going to be your stance? Forgiving
Give and forget, then only you can reach to the level that Allah will turn in mercy upon you. And you know, if we just focus on our record, is it really worth forwarding in front of Allah? Are we really in the position to stand in front of him? If not, then we shall be merciful upon those who did wrong to us. Certainly Allah will certainly raise our, you know, levels on the day of judgment, and it will certainly help us in this world as well. I've seen a lot of things happening to me, just some days back in this Ramadan when I wanted to help some some orphan kids, and like it was wrong. And you know, a sort of letter was circulating in my colleagues and in my work area, and in my
students and everywhere. And I was thinking, how am I going to explain, but one thing that I just seen, I took an oath, I wouldn't be going there, I won't be helping them. But when this thing came to my mind, I said, No, the biggest Kfar for me the biggest expiation for me is to help those orphans to help that organization and forgive them. And you know, it gave me peace and Hamdulillah I know I will be wrong. Many places now want to forgive me. So this is the biggest lesson that I took for myself from screen. Just forgive and forget.
system. Any final thoughts? For sharing this beautiful word, testimony? Any final thoughts?
You're thinking?
I was just thinking about how in the previous verse 21, it says, don't follow the footsteps of Satan. And I was thinking how when you think the worst of others, you tend to think that you're better where you tend to forget your own self. So and you know, that's arrogance, and Satan's
is one of the attributes is his arrogance. And so that's
upon them that you see how one sin that from others on one perceived sin could result in a lot of domino effect. A lot of people become self righteous and stuff. Beautiful jaql locker says that Hafsa mashallah, that was a great session as usual. So, but back to your Java library community.
Exactly the left hair chef Subhanallah that was indescribable I feel like we're getting really good at this and hamdulillah as as we get into the last 10 nights, I hope that is inshallah this has impacted your own number. And when you're hearing the RE citation in third week, and when you're kind of getting closer and closer to the grand and more confident and I pray that this has been beneficial for you all, just acknowledge that you are really mashallah like skilled at leading us into the right direction and then letting us fly with it. So we'll accept from you know, major announcements Inshallah, we're just going to close off in shell for today's session. There's
announcements coming in the next few days, I'm just waiting for the team to get everything ready before I can start announcing things so just sit tight, Inshallah, there's an exciting weekend coming up. Something I can't tell you about right now Inshallah, but that will be announcing soon. And of course, a few little things that we'll be opening up before we close off the blessing month of Ramadan, we are hitting day number 19 tomorrow so the countdown is right there. SubhanAllah. I do want to take a second to mention that what Sister sorrows lon mashallah, like her contribution, her style of teaching is, is something else because of martial her professional background. And we made
sure for that reason to bring her and our guest tomorrow, Dr. Ouma Hussein into our course that I mentioned before, inside out outside in on mental health and Islam. And we cover some very difficult taboo topics that are not covered thoroughly and done justice to in our community until more recently, but never in this kind of context. So that course is not open for registration right now, but do look out for for their work in sha Allah and do support because we were able to make that course pay what you can, and over 5000 people benefited from it because of people's generous donations. For it to mug, we're able to do things like that to make, you know, really beneficial,
crucial content for the community open and free, or to you know, at a low, very low price just so that people can access it because there should be no barrier to it. So does that clear to everyone who donated at that time to make that experience possible. And once again, I encourage you guys to continue donating and supporting on [email protected] First that donate so that we can make future projects like that happen. And in sha Allah Farah, we're excited to jump in tomorrow. Tomorrow is going to be the number 19. As I mentioned, we're going to have SHEIKH AHMED Hussain who is a co teacher for that course as well inshallah with us, and I can't wait to jump in with you guys. Same
time, same place. any links that were relevant for today's session, we're going to try drop on telegram if there's anything I missed, please drop it there and of course, for unreflected please copy everything that you were able to share here there as well so that we can get to the benefit to benefit for years to come for now. SNM Wa aleikum wa rahmatullahi wa
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