DONATION APPEAL!

ALL our Projects are FREE and with no advertisements.

We serve millions of downloads a month... Now! Imagine earning on-going rewards of every lecture and quran audio and so on.

As well as helping us cover our running costs and future projects!

mufti menk image

"I really think this is one of the greatest causes one could support"

    Become a Patron
    Donate via PayPal

More Information and Options

Being Patient with Your Kids

share this pageShare Page
Sajid Ahmed Umar

Channel: Sajid Ahmed Umar

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:09--> 00:00:22

look into this idea. Allah addresses the believers and he says, oh, full circle more and equal now. He commands us to save ourselves and our families from the house.

00:00:23--> 00:00:34

And this is a general instruction. But if you ponder over it, you find the concept of parenting included, because parenting is a means through which you will save your families from the health.

00:00:36--> 00:00:52

If we look at the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he says Kulu kumara welcome Miss Odin and Ray, that each and every one of you is, is a shepherd, and each and every one of you is responsible for his or her flock. If you ponder over this, you find this

00:00:53--> 00:01:24

being an instruction that includes parenting, why, because when we have children, we constitute being shepherds, and our children constitute being our flock. And in another generation, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam says that there is no person who Allah subhanho wa Taala faces a trust upon him, and he or she deceives the trust that Allah has given them. We are deceptive with this trust, except that Allah subhanahu Attallah will enter them into the Alpha. Right so the punishment for

00:01:25--> 00:02:08

being deceptive with regards to the trust that Allah subhanho wa Taala has given us is a severe punishment, right. So when we ponder over these narrations, we see here that they include the concept of parenting because prayer is parenting is a trust that Allah subhanho wa Taala has placed upon us so this is the first way that we learn about this topic in our sources. The second way that we learn about this topic is indirect instructions in the Quran and the Sunnah, in relation to this topic. So for example, we look into the Quran, we find Allah Subhana Allah to Allah, revealing what Amala halacha the Salah, it was severely Allah He commands us by saying command your families

00:02:08--> 00:02:54

towards the prayer towards the Salah was severe it is Tuggerah your stubbornness DEVAR stubborn, this term denotes a more intensified instruction towards having patience. Right so Allah is saying command you found the knees towards the prayer and be persistently patient with this command. Be persistently patient in raising your children with regards to the salah. And if we ponder over the reality of the verse, the verse is commanding us towards Salah. So what about everything else, which is an ideal, but lower in terms of importance, right with regards to Salah, we understand that all these idols are included within the instruction. Allah subhanho wa Taala says, command your families

00:02:54--> 00:03:27

towards the prayer and all the ideals revealed by Allah subhanho wa Taala was not your ally and be persistently patient with the process. So this is a direct command towards parenting. Right and we will touch upon this Inshallah, later on in the topic, we will add some more lessons that we can derive from this particular verse. The point right now is for us to understand that here we have a direct instruction revealed by Allah with regards to this topic. And then Allah subhanho wa Taala goes on to say Latinus Luca is that we do not

00:03:29--> 00:03:32

ask from you provisions and sustenance.

00:03:33--> 00:04:13

We are the providers. What are people to the taco and the good end is for the people of Taqwa. And if we found over this, this particular ending of this idea, which directly is related to parenting, especially in the 21st century, then we find this is offering us guidance in terms of what I said earlier about mandatary roles and elective roles, right? That He Allah subhanho wa Taala is saying, We do not ask from you provision, yes, you got to do what you need to do, but understand that ultimately it is Allah subhanho wa taala, who provides, today we find parents, they restrict to the concept of parenting to the practice of provision

00:04:14--> 00:04:31

to such an extent, that the elective role, which is the job that they have, which is lesser in importance than the mandatary role, which is the role that Allah has given you. What do we find parents doing? They flip it in terms of priority, they give more importance to the job when

00:04:32--> 00:04:59

raising the kids, and how do they justify it in their mind through cognitive dissonance? What do they do? They say that this is parenting I'm providing for my child. And this is clear evidence that they've understood exactly what parenting is the restricted to the concept of provision. And Allah says We haven't asked you to provide we are the providers. Right? It shouldn't be that your children suffer as a result of this concept of provision waits for

00:05:00--> 00:05:38

about putting food on the table and buying them clothes and taking them for holidays, and so on and so forth. And sometimes we, as community workers, we come across the statement when there's turbulence in a home and we arbitrating between child and father, or child and Mother, you find the father getting up and saying, but what happened I given you, whatever they bought you what happened we provided you right. So at that moment, in the heat of the moment, you find that the Father has misunderstood and the mother has misunderstood that parenting is far beyond the concept of just providing and I'll touch on this inshallah just now. So Allah subhanho wa taala. He offers us a

00:05:38--> 00:05:42

direct instruction towards parenting, and later on, he tells us don't

00:05:44--> 00:05:55

flip the priorities don't give the elective role more importance than the mandatary role. If you do so, you're setting yourself and your family up for failure. You're not setting them up for success.