Attaching to Allah, A Dhul Hijjah Series #9 – How Can I Be Content With What I Have?

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Omar Suleiman

Channel: Omar Suleiman

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Episode Transcript

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The small practice of doing the good throughout the day that you know when something good happens say hamdulillah something bad happened you say hamdulillah to just the repetition of handleless Hannelore Bismillah it does so much for your perspective. Just the repetition and the action of you know, doing it, you know, it's gonna hit you in your heart somewhere

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I'll be Zerhouni and a score on arithmetic ility a Namta yo Anna Wiley they were an Atmel slightly hand toggle. Wha What Attila Neve your automatic fear Eva, you can slide it in

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so there's a story that I always tell in Hajj that gets me in trouble. It's the Hadith of the prophets lie some good husbands try to use against their wives. All right.

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Where he mentions a boy he may slim business marry, and it smell and smell comes to visit Smiley's after a smile has grown up. He's married. Ibrahim comes to the house of dismay. He has permission from a lot to go check on him. So he goes to his home. And

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this man he does not home his wife answers. His wife does not know that this is her father in law.

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And her father in law does not tell her that he is her father in law. But she serves this noble looking old man.

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And Ibrahima Islam says, How was your situation? You know, tell me about your situation. And all she does is talk about how horrible everything is. You know, it's terrible. We're living in hardship, poverty, you know, nothing good is coming out of this, you know, just

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complaints. And they brought him on. He says to her that when your husband comes home,

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my salaam to him and tell him that he should change the door to his gate.

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So Smita Islam comes home, how was your day? She says this old man came by.

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And very interesting old man. You know, I served him and he asked me how I was doing. And I told him about the difficulties and the hardships we're facing and smile. He says, Did he say anything to you that he relayed anything for me? She says yes. She said, when your husband comes home, that the old man said that you should change the door on your gate.

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So it's like, I'm sorry, I can't be with you anymore. So she was the door to the gate. Alright. And so later on in the Hadith boy, he my son goes back. And he visits and this is my Islam's wife again. And he,

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you know, goes in and this is a woman that, you know, serves him and says that, um, and he asked her how are you Pamela same situation, nothing has changed about the house. Nothing has changed about their circumstances, nothing has changed about their poverty. And she says that Hamdulillah we are doing well. You know, everything is great. All she has is good things to say about their situation.

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And he's pleased and he says to her, you know, when your husband comes home, give my Siddhanta and tell him he should keep the door on his gate.

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So it's my son comes home, and I'm paraphrasing the Hadith, obviously. And, you know, says How was your day and she says this noble, beautiful man came by today. And I served him. And then he asked about our situation. And I told him and hamdulillah our situation is and smart. He says, Did he say anything? You know, to relate to me? And she said, yeah, he said, When your husband comes home, give them to them and tell them to keep the door in his cases and Hamdulillah I get to keep my wife, you know, that's really what this boils down to. Now, first of all, as I tell husbands,

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you are not just married.

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Father in laws, you are not Ibrahim IdeaCentre. Right? This is a very unique situation to unabIe to a prophet of Allah subhanaw taala story about gratitude. And Ibrahim is that as a person who was grateful in all circumstances, right? And this man is known as a person who is patient and grateful and all sorts of circumstances. And I tell people, especially when you go to hedge, Ibrahim does not like people who complain.

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He doesn't like people who whine

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Right, you want to hedge anything? You remember this? All right. He doesn't like people who whine he doesn't like people complain. That's not That's not the spirit that Ibrahim is left for us to inherit, right? People who complain who whine about their situation. Now, the power of this, though, is that both of these women had the exact same situation, but saw life entirely differently.

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What does that say to you about the power of perspective

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is so powerful? I mean, how you reframe it,

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you know, it's a part of your leadership and

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your ability, you know, to see well, you know, that Allah has blessed you with, I mean, it's the glass half full kind of situation always. And you can just see so many blessings of what you have over those that don't, when we talked about stability, security progeny, all these things earlier. Were folks in other countries and you know, kids and stuff, they don't have this, they don't have what we have. And so, I mean, I wake up very grateful, the wake up and they have everything, all the comfort to the profit slice. I'm sad, look at those that have less than you, not those who have more than you. And with your blessings, look at the blessings you have. Not the ones that you don't have.

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Yeah. And

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it's all about what you're seeing. Right? And it was powerful. What's the first word you say when you wake up?

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Right, All praises be to a lot handed out like you open your eyes as a Muslim. You are to say it hamdulillah right when you wake up, that's how you are. That's how you're tuned. All Praise be to Allah who woke me up, who granted me life, granted me life after death. And to him as I returned, like I did not even take for granted that I'm going to open my eyes today. And the fact that I opened my eyes, the very first thing that I say I've handed in, and so the whole day should be held. The whole day should be at Hamdulillah. Right? And the profit slice I'm set min ASA, whoever wakes up with dunya Kabbalah humble and the dunya is their greatest concern the world the life of this

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world is their greatest concern. jallo Fuck Rabine Allah places poverty between their eyes, they wake up, and all they see is poverty for the rest of their day. Because the dunya is the greatest concern. life of this world is their greatest concern. Perspective is off. Right? So they have poverty between their eyes. It's like if you know something skewing your vision Subhanallah if there was something put in front of you, you should get this You're the eye doctor right? So you know, masha Allah put something in front of your eyes an object and so the object is poverty. And it is skewing your vision for the whole game. Right? And the dunya will escape them anyway. So they'll

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chase after and it's going to escape them and whoever wakes up and the asset or the hereafter is their greatest concern. Allah subhanaw taala puts richness, self sufficiency, wealth and Allah gathers for them, their affairs of this dunya as well. So lost parents are facilitates for them, as well. What else does this story this concept give you in terms of how you see things versus what you have and what you don't have?

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I think about the common, you know, just the small practice of doing the good throughout the day, that, you know, when something good happens, say 100 Something bad happened, you say hamdulillah two, and then you know, when you leave out you say Bismillah when you know before you do certain actions, just the repetition of handleless Hannelore Bismillah it it does so much for your perspective. Even when you you know you want to start that practice, and it doesn't really hit you at you know, when you start it, but just the repetition and the action of you know, doing it you know, it's gonna hit you in your heart somewhere. And you know, with perspective it does a lot for

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your emotional maturity

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and growth and it's something that so little but has huge effect on us the greatest blessing though the amount of desire Rahim Allah says every little bit clearly, you're so pleased with so little because your little is so much you know, you're pleased with it. Right? Someone is not pleased with the value of gold and others pleased with a sip of water and sugar gratitude is what the what the increase is. It's probably what you mentioned about VIP kid here is also very powerful because the kid is not just an act of the tongue. The profit slice I mentioned that polishes the heart. And what sees the heart is what season does not see the heart is what is blind or has vision. And wicked is

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what refines the heart that you know on the lens gets fog ridiculous what's cleaning the lens so that you can keep on seeing throughout the day so they can just polishing the heart and hand and hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah

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How can a person who's thinking have the last throughout the day,

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feel anything, but gratitude, so lost pounds or throughout the day? That's really interesting because like in life coaching you do, you want to increase in affirmations. And that could in of itself is an affirmation. And it really is supposed to reverse negative perspective it's supposed to, if you're doing it, right, you're doing it in the moment of the trigger, like in the moment that you feel that negativity, and it starts peeling away at, you know, that limiting belief that you're carrying on and there is a power in the wicked. I love that you said that. Because it's something that we like when when clients come in, that's something that works the best for them. I think

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gratitude is what drives action, if you're not, if you don't, if you're not grateful for what you have, you're not going to, you know, keep on elevating to the steps of wherever you want to whatever path you want to try to gain. If you're in a slump, I mean, you're just going to get deeper and deeper and deeper into that slump. And so there is there's a healing agent in it. And it's funny that you say like, you know, it's in the heart because that's something that we, again, of course, like a stem only complements life coaching. It's not the other way around. But it's just

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it's so interesting that we have to work on our clients hearts first, and then their minds because it's all it's all in the feelings on Allah. If only Ibrahim is some good life coach, you know, we have the example. I honestly think they wouldn't be considered like coaches in my yard.

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Every single day, every word every approach every perspective, I mean, he was life coaching this mine is love and his and his and his spouse is here, right? But you know, the extent to which when Allah mentions the blessings that Ibrahim or Islam is going through, and he's mentioning all these blessings upon him. He says what either amounted to a whole yesterday, when I get sick, he cures me. He didn't attribute the illness to ALLAH SubhanA Tsai, he attributed only the cure to Allah. So even the careful words that he would use to attribute the blessings to Allah subhanaw to Anna, and to be patient with the hardships.

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And that's perspective, right? That perspective makes you so conscious that even when you express your gratitude for the last time, right, and some people, you know,

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it's like you ask them, how are you? And they say, you know, life is terrible. For this reason, this reason, this reason, this reason.

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You gave every reason that you're not saying it hamdulillah but then you added an hamdulillah at the end as if it made it somewhat better, you know, you know, but it was like You gave all these reasons why life is not good. And complaint. And then at the end, I'm doing like you're at home did it that was a complaint. You know, in the Brahim is that, um, you see constant gratitude, And subhanAllah you know,

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think about the Prophet slicin them

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whose words in history have been documented like the messengers,

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not a single human being comes close? Can you think of a single Hadith that even resembles a complaint? I can't think of one.

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One Hadith that even resembles a complaints with all that he went through it his salatu salam, and we have everything from him. I mean, they have gone and documented every single word of the 1000s and 1000s and 1000s of narrations. This man sallallahu alayhi salam who went through all of this, where do you see complaints? All you see is gratitude, gratitude and humility to a loss of habitat. And we pray that we are able to be sustained as well. Would that gratitude is children of Ibrahim is not and it's not either Muhammad SAW my solemn that we're able to continue that legacy of gratitude.

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So sister Sada, someone says, Look, I know I have a lot I know I should be grateful. But I'm still not feeling satisfied. So how do you help me actually become satisfied and content with what I have? Contentment is one of those elusive goals that we all strive for, in our lives upon Allah and imitate Me Out Of Home Allah described it, I think beautifully, where he described contentment as the greatest door to paradise on this earth, and also a door to Jenna Subhanallah and I think that that's such an apt description, because anybody who has been dissatisfied, who struggles with feelings of dissatisfaction, you know how how difficult that can feel how negative that can feel and

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how it almost feels like you're looking at at your life through a cloudy lens, where you only see the negatives until the opposite of being able to experience a life filled with contentment is so incred

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Blue joyful until we all strive for that both for the dunya benefit, the worldly benefit that comes with it psychologically, but then even more the spiritual benefit that that comes with it. And almost half that tells us that the reward of a person being content with Allah content with their life content with a decree of Allah Subhana. Allah is Jenna, right? Where we're welcomed into Jana, as a nest and multiman, another satisfied self. And that would not be a reward if it was beyond our control. And so how do we hone this sense of contentment? The first thing that's so important to realize is, number one that it is within our control is that actually only 10% of our happiness is

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based on our life circumstances. But we all tend to attribute our happiness to what's going on in our lives. Once I get that promotion, I'm going to be happy once I lose those 10 pounds once I get married, once I have children once I once I once i and then once you reach that goal, you feel exactly the same. And you can feel hopeless, like is anything in my life ever going to be enough? And the answer to that is No, unless you make it enough, because our happiness is not reliant on our circumstances. And we see that in the example of Ismail Annie sedum, and he's these his two wives and their experience, they experienced the exact same circumstances. But the way they felt in those

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circumstances were completely different. So acknowledging to ourselves, whether I complain about something, or whether I'm happy with something, it doesn't change the circumstances, but it changes how I experience the circumstance. And that's incredibly powerful. And one of the things that I find to be most helpful for me personally, is to create a mindset shift, where I tell myself, I get to do something, instead of I have to do something. So I get to drive to work, I get to clean up the mess of my children, because how many people are unemployed who wish they could have a job? How many people don't have children who wish that they could have children. And so when you switch your

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mindset to get to, versus I have to then suddenly even the things that are frustrating, seem like they're filled with blessings. And so that's one simple thing that that I think can help us to really reframe our circumstances and take control of gaining that sense of contentment. Inshallah, if you're benefiting from this content, then please make sure to click subscribe and make sure that you turn on your notifications.