Impactful Speech

Nouman Ali Khan


Channel: Nouman Ali Khan

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Human beings were given a special ability to produce language. We're more capable, we're more sophisticated in how we use words and how we can communicate ideas and advanced ideas and the power of words actually, I would argue there's nothing more powerful that human beings are capable of than words. As a matter of fact, there's nothing more powerful and the most power the most evident indication of that is that Allah azza wa jal himself decided to guide humanity through words at the end of the day. The Quran essentially is Kalam Allah as he describes it himself, and so Toba, it is the speech of Allah it is words, and so human beings does this great gift that Allah taught us when

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he said Allah, Quran and Swatara and they said, Allah Allahu Allah. Yeah. And before that, I live in Quran Allah Collinson, Allah Who Alba and he taught the human being the ability to speak. So our words are actually a very powerful gift that Allah gave us. And using when we open our mouth and say something, we have to appreciate that this gift was not given to other creation the way it was given to us. And this is the gift because of which we are able to communicate with Allah. And Allah communicates with us through this gift, that revelation would mean nothing if we didn't have the power of language. So when you have been given an I have been given a very expensive, I would even

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argue a priceless gift, then the way we use it has to be exquisite, we have to be extra careful about how we use this gift, because we value it. On a side note, I just want to say something that's not related to this codebook and that is that all languages English, Arabic, French, German, Punjabi, Bengali, youth, you name it, whatever, whatever language, Bahasa whatever language you speak. All of them are children of the language taught to Adam alayhis, salam, all of them. And all languages, Adam and Islam did not know language on his own, it was revealed to him that was revealed to him, You know what that means? That all languages are a revealed gift of Allah, all of them. So

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making fun of somebody's language, and making fun of how somebody speaks, or making some fun of, you know, fun of cultures, because they have different language than us is actually making fun of something Allah Himself revealed. It sacred. You know, some people have in their head that Arabic is sacred, but you know, Punjabi, but you know what all languages Allah says Allah Allahu Allah and Allah, the word the same one who tell you said he taught the Quran is the same one who said he taught speech, same verb is used. Allah is the teacher of the Quran. Allah is the teacher of all speech, all speech. So get this concept out of your head. There's such a thing as the language of

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the kuffar or the language of the non Muslims or the language of Jehovah No, no, no, no all languages from Allah. And we have to have respect for all languages. And that's, that's a side note that I wanted to bring up. But regardless, now, we come to the idea of a cold studied and I wanted to go through this this loaded term, the word sat down in Arabic.

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As far as the material term is concerned, the first implication of it is a law called halal. It means to fill in a gap or a crack. When something like you know old walls invent back in the day now we have sheetrock so in America, at least it doesn't show as much but when you have stone walls or concrete walls over time, some there's some holes, and you have to fill them in, patch them up. That patch is actually a set in Arabic, or Sadad in Arabic to fill up a gap. Now what does that mean for speech? What the first implication of that is, sometimes when somebody speaks to you, they cause damage, just like the damage on the wall. Like somebody says something hurtful to you, somebody says

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something ignorant. Somebody sometimes people say something ignorant about you, or they say something ignorant about what they don't know. Or they speak as though they know but they don't really know. And some of the most interesting is when people speak on behalf of Allah's deen and say, You know what, that's haram. Where did you Where did you learn that? Haram? What are you know what this one makes things up about Islam makes water you have the knowledge to say that before you make a claim about someone, you have the knowledge to say something is halal or haram before we open your mouth, open our mouth. Now when you hear in ignorance like that, our first impulse is to put

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people in their place and to just shut them down. But you know, if you respond to ignorance with anger, or you respond to ignorance by you know, a reaction and you know, an upset reaction, or you know, what would you call put someone in their place? Right, that's ignorant, you have no knowledge. What are you talking about this? You know, you're ridiculous, etc. When you have these kinds of responses? Well, when you offend someone, because you're offended when you offend someone back, do you think they're gonna just hear that and say, Oh, I didn't realize I was being ignorant. Thank you for humbling me. Now I'm just going to sit down and be quiet. That's not what's going to happen.

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They Hear You respond in an aggressive fashion and what happens? They say, You know what, I'm going to take the next step. And now I'm going to become even more aggressive. I'm going to take because, you know, pride kicks in, pride kicks in, you just attacked me. You just criticize me. And the human nature is to not accept criticism. It's to actually defend yourself. Whether it's physically defend yourself, but even verbally defend yourself. Then right

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It All Wrong exits from the conversation, all you want to do now is put someone else in their place. So now they say something even more obscene and more offensive. Now as you hear that you get more upset, and the crack gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. But if we understand that we have to have the Taqwa of Allah, the cautious awareness of Allah, when engaged in conversation with someone who causes a crack, who says something ignorant, who says something outrageous, we have to learn the process of saying, What am I going to say, that covers this gap. And there's not going to be a back and forth that makes this crack worse. You have to you have to and you know, the people

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you have an argument with are not people you never met. These are people you've known your whole life. These are friends, family, coworkers that you deal with all the time, you know how they speak. And for many of you, you've had the same exact argument 20 3040 times. Man, every time I go and talk to my mom, this happens. Every time I talk to my dad, we end up like this. And we I talked to her. And this happens every time I talked to my friend, this happens, he always says this. Well, if he always says this, And you always respond in the same way, and it always goes the same wrong way. But you don't understand what's studied means then maybe you need to think ahead and say, I've already

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gone down this road before. And I know where it leads. Maybe I need to be smarter now. And say something or not say something, avoid saying some things, or say things in a way that will close the store. That won't, you know, that will not perpetuate further. And that's something you really have to become thoughtful about. Think about languages, you know, of all the muscles that we have in our body, the eyes and the tongue are actually very easily used. You don't have to actually exercise you don't get tired of using your eyes. You just open them and they work. Hands can get tired, legs can get tired, your back can get tired, but the tongue can move very quickly. The eyes can move very

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quickly. So we get trigger happy and we just whatever comes in our mouth just leaves immediately. And ancient poet once said that he wished that His neck was one mile long. What a strange thing to say I wish my neck was one mile long. And he was asked why do you say that? And he said, well, because my gut tells me I should say something. And when those thoughts traveled from my gut through my neck, maybe I should have time to think no, no, put it back down. That shouldn't come out of my mouth. So I'm hoping it's a mile long, you know? So another good hire oh man, another another column like being a being embarrassed or regretting that you said something is worse, regretting that you

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didn't say something is better? You know, so uncovered or studied? First of all, should I say something? Should I not say something? And what I say? Is it going to escalate and make things worse, instead of making things better. And with your experience, you already know which kinds of words or phrases or tone, or suggestion did not go well. So maybe it's time to experiment with a different direction. Say something other than what you said before, say something that won't cause damage, maybe undo damage. I'll give you an example. Because one time, a long time ago, there was an elder that I looked up to in a masjid that I shall not name because he'll know he's watching. So I

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used to look up to him. Very, very nice fellow, everybody who met him in the masjid was just just get soft around him. He just got this very loving personality. And one time we were in the masjid and two of the elders in the masjid had a fight with each other arguing yelling, screaming at the top of their lungs after maghrib prayer, and the elder that I respect and love is also a witness to this conversation. And usually what he used to say is you'd come in, he would say salaam, how are you how's your family for every person he met, he would be discourteous. And I was one of the regular Messalina type machine. And I noticed that when after that he would still say salaam to me

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the same way. But those two other fellows, he would come and just say salaam to them. But that more conversation than that. He wouldn't have longer conversation with them. And they felt it. And so one of them at one time we were leaving the machine, one of them said, you know, you used to ask me how I'm doing. We used to talk, you don't talk to me like that anymore. And he said, Well, I saw you lose your temper. And I felt that, you know, if I don't want to be a reason that one day you lose your temper towards me. And then that sin is on you in the house of Allah. And if you lose your temper towards me and I feel bad towards you, then the angels will record that too, as something

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against you. So I care for you, which is why I speak less to you now.

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That's what he says to him. He doesn't say no, you know, you're so ignorant. Although you fought that guy, I don't want to talk to you. Why would I? Why would anybody want to talk to you? He actually made it something about his care for him. He doesn't want him to become a worst sinner. He doesn't want him to have a record against him. He doesn't want him to have you're himself to have a bad feeling towards the person who lost their temper. And that brother who lost his temper, who people were afraid to talk to him because he loses his temper stuck there crying his eyes out, crying his eyes up and the next thing he did is he apologized to the one he fought with. That's what

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he did all of that because of just a cold I studied

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Just knowing having the wisdom of what to say, and how to say it, how to engage this is a very powerful, very difficult quality. Because once again, we are programmed, whatever comes in your head just comes out just immediately impulse reaction, right. And this is actually one of the meanings of the word Johanna Alcon in Arabic is to tie up and Jamal is to let loose. Whatever comes goes. Okay? This is why we're either Hapa Homolka Hey Luna Colusa gamma and Soto Furqan when the ignorant address them ignorant doesn't just mean ignorance. It also means impulsive. You had the impulse to say something and you just set it stop think, you know think how am I going don't just throw

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grenades with your words. Don't just throw going to be have targeted, direct, impactful speech exact words. And if you can't think of saying something, it's better to stay quiet.

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