Thematic Study of Sura An-Nur #03 – Gender Relations
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Channel: Musleh Khan
Series: Musleh Khan - Thematic Study of Sura An-Nur
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AI Generated Summary ©
The host discusses the importance of sh mattered, balancing temptation and control, praying for oneself, and avoiding negative language in personal emotions and actions. They stress the importance of forgiveness and privacy regulations, as well as privacy rules and giving a hint of presence to avoid privacy and privacy issues. The conversation also touches on privacy regulations and how to respond to privacy requests, emphasizing the need for a strong bond to avoid further physical harm and a strong privacy test.AI Generated Transcript ©
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so I'm going to
do the announcements for today they're gonna say exactly the workshop on Monday
and you don't have to live with.
And so your your privilege to attend the details is on the website. I started the class yesterday, every Wednesday at 630 or 630 to eight. If you know anybody that is between the ages of 15 and 20. They are encouraged to come to this program and say you can program these programs until March. There's only a couple of spots.
Next week will be the last check.
So I think that there's only two or three spots left.
And finally, the screen
will kick off tomorrow during the night.
And then there will be events every Saturday starting October 9. So again, all of these details are on the website. So you're encouraged to register for some of these
How's everyone doing?
Hamdulillah
I guess somebody will turn this on right
maybe I should do
I don't need it but if you guys need it
okie dokie Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim, Al hamdu lillahi rabbil aalameen
We're now ready. You
can always save the intro until he's ready. But
in the meantime, does anybody have any questions? I'm reminded to remind all of you that make sure you check in every so often into your accounts. And especially take the quizzes that I've uploaded. I've uploaded two of them and there will be a third one, maybe tomorrow or the day or the day after Inshallah, as well as
Of course, a the next handout, so just keep that in mind Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah he salam ala Hardy who are early he was pervy edge Marian, what Mr. nimbi stunning that he only Dini and buried so they're more equal marketable. warahmatullahi wabarakatu.
And of course, we are here as we continue our journey with SUTA to newer and concentrating on a thematic study of the surah. Now we've completed the A as you see in front of you
how shade of pine gains control over someone, and how shaytaan temptation works we know that he tempts he will tempt mankind, leather us whistle figures to dorkiness. So he will whisper and tempt mankind, especially in the chest of people. What that means is that shaitan gets pretty close to your heart, but not in your heart, but he gets really close to it. So how that step by step guide takes place of how his influence happens is found in this area. And what we did is we went through
we went through the area,
and we broke it down in steps.
So we understand why this area is here. And we looked at the steps that this particular area highlighted. And as you see in front of you the steps of trade on begins he actually begins with hotellet What literally means one footstep and the Prophet Alayhi Salatu was Salam told us in authentic narration, that the believer is rewarded for every footstep they take when they go to the masjid. And sometimes you know, the self, what they would do is when they heard this hadith, they would end up going to the farthest Masjid possible and walk there. Now you and I, obviously we don't walk. But the scholar said that the the Hadith still applies even when you're driving or you're
taking the bus, that you will get rewarded. Each and every point that you move forward, however, that happens, whether it's through with a car or footstep, you will still be rewarded for the effort and the journey. But the steps of Shaitan in terms of his whispering his temptation still continues, and he does the same thing. So the whole point of the steps is what we mentioned is that shape funds, temptation works gradually. It rarely, if ever, shaitan will come in front of an individual, or the temptation would literally, you know what I would say slap you in the face. But what you will, what will happen is that you will, for example, see something that's tempting to you, but it's
just visually you notice something and you're like I stopped for Allah Shaddai now steps in and take another look. So one glance turns into two turns into three. And if that's not controlled, and so I want you to write this down. What this area also teaches us is, if you do not control what you look at, you will not control what you do. If you don't control what you look at, you will not control what you do. So the first step of shaitan is to tempt the eyes, which is what we're going to see later on in one of the verses we will look at today in sha Allah.
So this the footsteps are there, meaning the temptations are there, follow those footsteps, it who want to shake on Alright, let's get to shaytaan. So Allah subhanho wa Taala says, don't follow into these footsteps. So don't fall for the temptation. Because if one does then the next step
for him, Mr. Morrow, he will command you, he'll start telling you what to do because while you've become a follower now, so now it's easy for Shaitan to just literally say to you and influence you and tempt you, and those temptations now start to become more and more easier.
You know, to the point where if I look that's not so bad. What's the big deal? Start talking like that. That's how I thought now owns you. And it continues to fascia and Moncada and we mentioned with fascia and Moncada is, the definitions are at the top left. So he will command two main areas. This is where shaitan influence happens the most in two main areas of our lives. And that is in fascia and in monka monka to do and say and be involved in evils that you and I would not imagine unspeakable crimes and behavior. And we gave examples of this last week. And if it's not that, then it's just shameful behavior as a whole shameful behavior as a whole.
And finally, where we pause is the concept of tazetta. So let me just go back for a second here.
As you see what else have football on here it comarca to him and that can mean coming ahead in Aberdeen had it not been for the virtue of Allah subhanho wa Taala and His mercy, none of you would have been pure. So the first lesson in this area to survive all of the temptation of shaitaan is to understand that only Allah can help you do that. No one has the ability to overcome the temptation of shaitan on their own, except that they need and they must ask for Allah's help. Which is really profound. You know, we saw another example of this in Surah Yusuf soon as used to finally his salaam was tempted by the wife of the ICS. What did you What did he do? What did he say? Pilar Morales
Allah, he sought protection from Allah, that he doesn't fall in the temptation, which means that even a prophet and a great man like use the fire Alayhis Salam still had to ask Allah for help to keep him pure, supine Allah so who are you and I? So Allah reminds us that that process of remaining pure ie not following into these traps of shame on that can only happen if you are from your Latina me know how the area begins.
Then Allah subhana wa Tada concludes what that quinoa Yuzuki mania. Well loves the marinara name Allah is of course, rather Allah subhanho wa Taala purifies whomever he wishes. So two things. Purification comes only from Allah. And number two, Allah chooses whom He wills to purify.
Just because you are a candidate of purification, from Allah subhanho wa Taala doesn't necessarily mean you're going to get it. It is something that you and I have to earn. And insert it to know that we've already went through two main themes of how we earned that, of course, the whole concept of Xena and everything that revolved around that subject, then we went to the subject of gossip. So controlling the body, then controlling specifically the tongue. Now we control the temptation of shaitaan. So these things are all going to be intertwined and interconnected with one another. Moving forward, don't declare yourself pure. Allah subhanho wa Taala does that. So this is the third
point that you learn from the a and if you're able to ward off a temptation, that's not as a result or consequence because of you that mashallah you know, you're practicing the deen or you're following these instructions, at the end of the day. tofi still comes from Allah. So success to be able to achieve the results you're hoping for, that's from Allah as well. So you see Allah subhanho wa Taala wants us to pay attention to all the little things. So the process to test here are purification to be a candidate to be purified. And even if you are purified, ie you protected from the steps of shaitan, the traps effect Shavon you're protected from that you don't fall into Xena
when the biller, you don't gossip, you don't cheat, you don't lie. You don't do any of these things. You don't get to say, well, because I know they're wrong.
That's why I don't do them. Or they're not a big deal. Like I could be around so many different women or so many different men, it's not going to tempt me, I'm fine. That doesn't bother me at all. You don't have to say that. You have to say in sha Allah, hopefully shaitan temptation won't have overcome me. And if you have success if you're able to stay strong in those moments when you're tested these yet remind us that's also from Allah as well. Okay.
What do you guys think of this question? What is the most effective way to extinguish shameful behavior?
What do you think it is?
What's the most effective way
to keep yourself strong? Keep yourself that every time you were attempted you're able to you have the tools and you've given yourself the best chance as an opportunity to overcome those temptations that would this does anybody have any thoughts? So again,
righteous companionship, anything else? Just shout it out.
Keeping yourself busy with other things, okay, one more.
You all do it by the way. Take a look.
Number one way in Islam that we have when you pray, you have full and complete protection from fascia.
The problem is
How you make prayer work. It's one thing that you get the salah over. And it's a whole nother thing when you pray and you actually reap the rewards and the benefits and the teachings of what prayer should give.
And a prime example of that is you always look at the way that we pray. It's different from any other religion ever on the face of this planet. Nobody prays like how Muslims pray. I mean, obviously, with the pandemic, we're not shoulder to shoulder but when you think of what saw that is and how it was legislated, you're shoulder to shoulder with people you don't even know
they can into your personal space, you're touching shoulder to shoulder
and sometimes its feet two feet.
And then you're following and doing the exact same movement of someone else, the man whom we don't know, but you're trusting that Imam, and you're following that Imam, in everything the Imam is doing, you are right there yet so you're devoted to what that Imam does. So if the Imam decides that he's going to recite one of the longest Sutras of the Quran, because of your devotion, your devotion with Allah, you continue to follow that Amen.
We pray beside each other. We're doing the exact same movement and it's synchronized. We're doing it all at the same time, nobody gets to go later or before the event, we're all have to do at the same that when you look at all of these components, just how we pray is enough of a protection. Because what it teaches you is it teaches you of course, to be humble. Humility leads to does QIA and it protects you from shameful behavior, humility.
And the fact that you are there shoulder to shoulder show this, it also shows you that you cannot achieve these things alone. Nobody can't achieve success and tofi in life by themselves. We are ordered to be together, we are ordered to unify with one another, we are ordered to support each other. It was a really sad flipside to this conversation.
You know what the sad part of it is?
brotherhood and sisterhood. Generally speaking, in this day, and age is deteriorating rapidly.
And we are in a time and we've been in this time for a long period where the moment we hear a fault of our fellow Muslim, those faults get immediately highlighted. And relationships and friendships are thrown out the window for the most trivial things, all the a hadith, all of the yet to talk about brotherhood and keeping us together and looking out and hosts no one thinking well of one another. Those are all thrown out the window.
Where does that come from? Why does that happen eventually leads back to some sort of fascia. There's too much of Fallout around you and I. So the things that are precious and things that are important to us, naturally, you start to lose respect and appreciation for those things. Sala keeps all of those components together. Once you continue to pray, then you continue to unify and you continue to protect yourself from temptations, like these. Now, next verse, verse number 22.
This should be in your handouts. Okay. And what that yeah, Teddy? Gleaming Chrome was set at a huge ordeal portabel Mr. Kean? Well, mohajir in FY sebelah, do not let the people of virtue and expense among you take an oath and suspend donations to their relatives. So what just happened here? What happened here? Here's the context of the idea. So look at the context first, and then we'll break down the A. So the title of this theme is the heart of Abu Bakar, or the Allah horn. So verse number 22, is linked in context to how Abu Bakar Of course, the father of our Isha thought I'll do Lohana how he responded, and how he felt when he heard the accusations against his daughter. First thing
you know, when you're a father,
and you have a son, you're protective. You'll do everything you can to nurture your son and take care of him and so on.
But when you have a daughter,
it's different. I don't know how to explain it. And it's been like this throughout the history of mankind. The relationship and that level of protection that a father has specifically for his daughter is very different than that of his son. I mean,
Those of you that have daughters and sons, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I don't even have to explain it. I have a daughter and I have a son. And you'll see it. It's like black and white in my house. You know, the mosquito will land on my son and I will teach my son how to kill it. When the mosquito comes near my daughter, I will say daughter, step aside, let me take care of this. And I will promise you that there will be no more mosquitoes near you again, it's just natural. It just comes out this way. Now, Abu Bakar Allah Horan, at the same relationship with his daughter Ayesha is very young. So for somebody to accuse his daughter now he's never Bucko he's the leader of the
messenger. So Lola who it was always the best friend, him in the process seldom used to walk like this used to intertwine their fingers together and hold hands and walk around Medina. They were best friends. I mean, I people over the years tried to do that with me. It's it's kind of weird, but it's a cultural thing. Is the point. He status is great. And in an honorable in our deen his history speaks for itself. When you hear Abu Bakar his name, you don't ask questions, you know, he's reliable and so on. His daughter's being accused, there's just rumor being spread about his daughter. He doesn't know how to handle so here's what he ended up doing what he ends up doing. I
boubakeur came to know that one of the persons who played a key role in spreading the slander of his daughter was a person by the name of Mr. Ibnu. Sasa Mr. Ibnu. With that which was the is just Family Table Bucha, the cousin of the maternal cousin of Abu Bakr, what are the Levant Miss thought even Musa. So this man heard the rumor.
And instead of remember, we looked at the verse where their first reaction when you hear a rumor should be what you should try to repel, and have what has not been Think positive about the person who's being talked about.
So you don't have to just dispel the rumor immediately and just say hello, and we're just gonna ignore it don't even Don't even mention No. But the thing you should never do is never fall victim to the rumor don't just fall into the rumor like Oh, really, that's what they're saying, Oh, my God, I never knew she was like that. We've discussed all of that right. But Mr. didn't do that. He ended up saying, wow,
wow. And their family can't believe she would have done something like that. I can't believe this is happening in my own family. And so he added more to the rumor of a buckler used to spend his own money to support many destitute persons, so many of the poor of Medina, Abu Bakar, the alarm used to take care of them, and you used to pay and give them a stipend every month. So Mr. Shah was one of those recipients, he was a poor man. And he would also collect from Abu Bakar every month or however often it was distributed. After finding out that Miss La had taken part in the slandering of his daughter, Abu Bakar was very angry. So look, what Abu Bakar did. He decided to stop the financial
support that he was providing Miss bar.
That's
just a tap on the wrist.
That's all level but candid. That's why
I put that heart I put the heart in that title for you to just get a glimpse, look at the heart of Abu Bakar. He doesn't say you know what, I'm gonna go over to the house, I'm gonna meet Miss La, I'm gonna take care of myself and give him a piece of my mind. I'm going to do this, he didn't do any of that. He said, I'm going to cut relations off mister.
I'm never going to talk to Mr. Again. He didn't do none of the officers came we stopped paying him.
Allah reprimanded that choice in this area, do not let the people of virtue so Abu Bakr and the people like him and expense among us take an oath to suspend donations to their relatives. Why? Because people at his caliber, this was the responsibility and example that people like Abu Bakar carried so you can't let so the idea of this A is you can always let your personal feelings get in the way of the grand level of righteousness and opportunity that you're given. You can't let feelings always get in there. You know, you know if you allow emotions to be involved in every act of goodness and righteousness. So another example of this is suppose me and you are volunteering at
a masjid and our job is to let everybody come through the door. Or your job is to serve food. Remember, we used to do that in Ramadan. Maybe not here but in other places used to serve
People would line up, you'd give them their rice and their chicken and their salads and so on. But all of a sudden one person comes up, you're like, why are you giving me so little? Give me more why being so students that's calling you names.
And you say to yourself, you know what, forget it. I'm not doing this anymore. I don't need to be treated this way. I don't need to us that people have Amen.
concentrate more on the act itself, and do their best to eliminate the emotional and the feelings that they may experience during that write that act of righteousness. It's not saying to ignore how you feel. But don't always let your feelings prevent and stop you why? Because your people have virtue you have he met. Again, this is another example of just how different our frame of mind and how we think it should be with the most basic things we do in day to day life.
The needy and the emigrants in the path of Allah and he should forgive. So if a bucket is told
what the full well, yes,
you should forgive and turn the page. So you know, it's like saying, if you were in a bucket of shoes, you're like, you know what, okay, fine, forget it. I'll just give him his money every month. What just from the word stuff has literally means to turn a page. So when we say in Arabic, it political Subha turn the page over. That's to avoid Abubakar or anybody in his situation, to hold any grudges. So the next time a miss block comes to Him, He will take care. I'll never forget what you did.
We do that with each other all the time. I remember 35 years ago, when I was back home, and I was 12 years old, and I was standing by the tree you looked at me funny. And I didn't like that from you. But don't worry, you're invited. We hold those kinds of grudges forever against people. And that's what Allah is saying. People have Amen. You don't do that. While you're sparkle hipbone en El Faro Allahu La come I love this part of the area.
Then Allah says, wouldn't you all love that Allah covers your mistakes. So put it together.
Allah is saying you do these things, turn the page and you forgive. Then guess what? That makes it a whole lot easier for you to receive the love and forgiveness of Allah subhana wa Tada. This A is one of a few yet in the poorer end, where scholars prove that anyone who holds grudges for no valid reason and by the way, in the Shetty, or there's almost non, it's almost non existent. There almost doesn't exist a single valid reason that allows you to hold a grudge against your fellow brother or sister in Islam, let alone relatives. It almost doesn't exist.
And they use this idea to say that if you hold those grudges wrongfully, then you will not receive Allah's love and forgive Allah won't forgive you.
alone won't forgive you. Meaning Allah won't accept your prayers, your doors and everything else you do because of that one grudge. We find this in another Hadith of our prophets are these little standard describes a group of people that will come on the day of judgment, and they will be told go to Jenna. They're walking towards the doors of Jenna. And as everyone is entering in the doors of Jenna, a group of them will be told wait, go back.
So there'll be confused. Yeah, Allah why the door of Jen is right there. We made it. Let us go and what happened?
In the Hadith mentions authentic hadith in the Sunon of EBI. doed
and ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada will say to them, you still have grudges are getting so and so so work it up or else I will
so it stopped them from entering gender and they're right in front of the door. That will be groups like this on yamu pa May Allah protect us from ever being amongst them? Allahu
Allah Who photo Rahim Allah is Ever forgiving and exceptionally merciful. So here are a few notes to jot down
at home while you are full you guys all know what I for is Allahumma in the car for winter hippo Darfur for foreigner where we say that in Ramadan are awful, forgive but don't punishment, like in other words, just let it go. That's awful. When you ask Allah bless us with your iPhone, or Allah. Just let these things go.
Don't hold me accountable.
Forgive them. But don't punish me or Allah don't hold me accountable. Just let them go erase them from myself.
Let's
remember is too far or forgiveness is still subject to what Allah will forgive. It doesn't necessarily mean he'll stop you from being punished. You still have to you may still have to go through that process in order to achieve Allah's forgiveness. Some groups will have that awful I all I don't want you to punish me at all. Just let it go erase it from my scale completely. Forgive me awful. Turn the page while you're special. Let it go, which we talked about close relatives. Our Eman is tested through our relatives just like Abacha. But on the ALA Han our Eman is always tested with the people closest to us. We all have that one uncle,
that one end,
that one person in our family or extended family, we all have that, where you just like oh, always looking for trouble always causing drama. We all have that one person, you've got to be cautious of how you deal with people like that, especially when they're close to you. The heart of Abu Bakar of the loved one, as we mentioned,
is exceptional. And Allah offers his forgiveness in turn of Abu Bakar letting go of his anger with Miss La.
That's like you and I, Allah offers his forgiveness to you. And if you let go of grudges of people around you or people in your life where Eman is strictly tested through our relatives?
Okay, what makes forgiveness difficult? We got to think
why is the difficult to forgive? And let go?
What do you guys think?
Why is that hard? We say this stuff all the time. Forgive, forgive, forgive. But it doesn't happen like that, that almost never happens like that. Why? What are what are some of the barriers you think preventing someone for forgiving others?
Well, you guys think,
thought to me just say something.
So again,
it's hard to forgive, it's just the whole process itself is difficult. It's difficult to forget the pain, the hurt the struggle, whatever it is that you've lost forgiveness for, it's difficult to do that. Emotions kick in feelings, all of those things, here are some of the things that's sort of the note highlights, the truth doesn't submit to you, you must submit to the truth. So in other words, at some point, you have to draw the line
and do the right thing.
Which is I think, is the next one. You can tell yourself anything you want. So if you tell yourself, I hate them, I don't want to be around them, I can forgive them. You can also say to yourself, you know what, I'm not going to hold anything, any resentment or hatred in my heart, I'm going to remove that, you can do that as well. And so it's a no teaches us both of these areas. So you can still at the end of the day, if you can tell yourself to do something in one office that you can also teach yourself to do the other.
I think that one of the greatest barriers of why it's difficult to forgive
is pride.
Ego.
I really think that but that is one of the real or main reasons why it's difficult to do that. Because you've got to humble yourself. You've got to humble yourself to say, you know, I was wrong, or despite of that person what they've said or done to me, I'm not going to hate them. It requires an incredible level of humility and humbleness in the sight of Allah. And that is something that you have to work at and ask Allah for. Humility is not something you learn out of a book. You attain humility, through experience, with a soft heart through your knowledge and your dealings with people. The more you interact, the more you understand, the more you you interact with people and
you're you're exposed to those emotions and feelings, the more you can understand, you know, panel at the end of the day, if I just say I forgive this all would be over 1012 years. 1012 weeks, no matter what it is, I can let it all go. How do you think every marriage lasts for more than a day?
Because you learn to forgive anybody who's married for more than a day, you've learned that lesson. Because it only takes one day to destroy it all.
So just keep that in mind. It'll come up again a little bit later in a Latina your moon and Mars wanna Tila coffee. Let me net. Those that accused dignified women that aren't even aware. So Allah is going to now speak on the sub
In a more generic sense, and include all the women like a shot of the a lot more. And some of our scholars said that more SONET here in the area, which is a dignified, honorable, pious, humble woman, any so it could be all of the women in our times, anybody with the men is counted in this day, Allah defends and protects them now, anybody who accuses women in particular, who are known to not have these qualities or these behaviors or these traits,
they are to be cursed in this world.
You see, Allah protects them.
Why? Because you you've submitted yourself to Allah, you've given yourself up for Allah. So Allah will give you something in return. And those individuals that wrongfully spread those rumors and set those and spread those lies. They're cursed in this world and in the next. So Allah says Laurino for dunya. Well, Pharaoh, whatever whomever is up on our team, and what awaits them is a great punishment. Yo Natasha dryly, him and Sina too, whom, what ad him What are Jota whom be mannequin who yet and then on
the day on which your tongues your hands and your feet are going to testify against to because of what you used to do. You know, we have, it's on it.
We are dictators over our body.
We control what our hands, our eyes, our tongues, we control everything, where we walk, what we choose to get involved with, and don't, we are in control. So on the Day of Judgment, that dictatorship is lifted, and you no longer can control those limbs. Instead, Allah will order those limbs to speak, they will be given the ability to speak. And the reason why it's why it does that. So it holds it doesn't hold back,
doesn't hold back. So even things you never thought were wrong. But you end up doing them with your hands or your eyes or what have they all come out and they expose themselves. So on the Day of Judgment, Allah subhanaw taala removes that dictatorship.
Yo man, he then you will see him on law who dean will help the day that will be truly compensated and they know how true Allah is clearly, one way or the moon and Allah who will happily moving. So in other words, Allah is emphasizing this day is coming.
And what I'm saying to you in this surah and throughout the Quran, is the ultimate truth horror movie in you know, if the area just ended up with how it was the truth, you wouldn't doubt Allah. But then Allah says Allah moonbeam. mobian Is that all you're not going to have any problem understanding what your hands are saying? What your legs might be saying? You're not going to have to be like, oh, I need an interpreter. No, it's going to be moving. You're going to hear it understand it completely and clearly. A hobby set to little hobby scene. While hobby soon a little hobby said. We'll take you back to the evening what a Buddha taught you that he came about her own
MMA Kowloon, the home of Farah Tomori spoon carrying via women are made for violin we talked about this earlier on when the school began. On Allah subhanaw taala talked about the man who committed zinna deserves the woman who is doing the same. They deserve each other. They're not restricted to just one another. But it's it's the phrasing itself. It's just a law saying you're meant to be you should be because why you're doing this you don't deserve purity, in that sense. So the same thing copy here literally means something that is uncomfortable.
It's terrible.
You don't you don't want to hear it. You don't want to see it. It just makes you it makes you like hobbies also when you when you make like a twisted face, when you see something disgusting and you kind of twist your face hobby this also used to describe the smell of garbage and trash.
So Allah says
that the women who carry those traits and the men who carries those traits again, they also belong with each other. While hubby Thorner little hobbies that environment are made for five women and good men deserve good women. So we know this and we recognize the same thing culturally and socially in our society and cross the below that generally good people marry good people. Generally speaking
The area is not restricted to that, you know, people can change Don't people can change. These areas are specifically highlighting people who live like this and do these things as a way of life. And then Allah subhanaw taala says they are absolved from what people say they're going to have forgiveness and noble provision. The Pharaoh tomb was boom, Kareem. So you see the hope. Allah subhanho wa Taala still says that at the end of the day, once they come to Allah azza wa jal with sincerity and forgiveness, they are deserving of that just like anyone else. Okay.
Any questions so far?
Yeah.
Yes, you can also refer to friends doesn't necessarily have to be married or spouses, it could be any company
decency in someone's home now. The rest of these two a yet will be the next hour of this session. Okay. So we're really going to break down a lot from now until the end of today's session. Okay.
Now we're going to get into a subject, which I like to call the laws of attraction in Islam. Okay, the laws of attraction or gender relations in Islam. So how men and women interact with one another. And this is a subject that sure you and scholars talk about all the time? Have you ever heard of like hope as in lectures where the man will say, you need to lower your gaze, you need to, you know, stay away from the opposite gender? No, don't shake hands, things like that. You ever hear those kinds of conversations. So they get those titles from the A yet we're about to look at insert to know what you're going to see is verse number 27, is the start of this subject. And it will continue
until verse number 33. So the start of this subject of gender interaction in Islam starts with verse number 27.
And the title of this verse is decency in someone's home, and I'll explain why.
Allah subhanho wa Taala begins.
So, like I said, we're gonna
hatch out a lot of different areas. In all of these I know,
first and foremost, if you're going to look at what are the rules of interaction with the opposite gender,
then you need to understand first and foremost, the concept itself. Why should we have rules when we are interacting with the opposite gender? Why should that exist to begin with? I don't need to do that. If I want to, you know, go out, or I want to have friends of the opposite gender, I should be able to have friends, why should that impede on my Eman or my faith with Allah, you know, a lot of social circles these days and so called thinkers of the world, attack these subjects in their own way. And they'll claim that, you know, it's an impeachment on your rights as an individual. Islam is so you know, dominant and controlling and etc, etc. And when you're young, and you're not grounded
Well, in Islam, you're not grounded well, with your relationship with Allah. You don't pray, you don't attend any classes. You're not educated. You don't know much about your identity. It's very easy for you to fall into those conversations and be convinced, yeah, maybe I don't need those rules.
I can sit beside anybody I want when I'm on the bus cares.
Even if we're alone in the elevator, who cares? We're just going in the elevator somewhere. No big deal. I don't have to be worried about no rules and laws.
Allah starts off the conversation with what you will Adina Eminem students, let me ask you quickly because we had discussed this, what does a Latina Eminem mean? We know what mean is more men is a believer. So what's a Latina M and those who acknowledge Amen? What did we say? Those people are? Who are they?
Yeah.
Go ahead. Did you have something you wanted to say? Okay, those are the nominal. Who did we say they were those who acknowledge the right thing, but
they don't practice it. They don't necessarily implement it.
They know what's right. They see what's right. Like, yeah, that's how
I don't know what to do about it.
She's my friend. I know it's hard for me to like, hang out with her and, but I mean, you know, she's my friend. I know. I got to change one day. I know I should wear hijab. I know. I should pray.
Five times I know I should fast but inshallah we'll get there. That's a Latina,
you at least acknowledge what's right and wrong.
That's what the bare minimum Allah requires you to have when you get into the subject, you've got to have some Amen. And the bare minimum that Allah will accept is that your ability to differentiate what's right and wrong. If you can do that you're on a good start. You think so far?
Okay.
Yeah, you're Latina man, Hula, hula Boo 10. or higher abou Tico.
Allah says don't enter a home that isn't your home.
What does this have to do with gender interaction?
So follow me. mentioned you visit somebody in their house guy goes over to his friend's home.
He walks in. And Allah says, Don't enter a home that's not your home. Meaning don't just waltz in and or don't, don't just show up unexpected. So first rule of thumb to write down here is the etiquettes of visiting people, even your own family, even your parents, you don't get to just roll up at your parents house and just be like, yeah, that my parents don't care. They'll always welcome. They're always welcome you because that's what parents do.
And they'll never tell you You came at a bad time? Because that's what parents do. They don't tell your kids that stuff.
But this area, first and foremost, says don't go to anybody's home unless you do two things.
Number one, what to Stephanie Sue.
And number two, what to sell him via. So number one,
take a look at it.
So we know why it started up with the people of Amen.
Beta Boo 10 House a place in which you settle in. So even if somebody let's say they rented out a cabin for the weekend, went by the lake somewhere and they rented a cabin, and you decide to drive up and surprise them. You don't get to say well, it's not even you guys home, you guys renting it. So I just came, you don't get to do that. Because wherever you're settling, even if it's just for one night or a few hours, if you are going to do what you do at home at that place, that's considered your house at that moment. Whatever. So if you change, you go to sleep, you eat you shower, you do all of the home things. That's your house. So technically, Beighton could also be
like a space, it could be a corner of this gym somewhere. That could be your bait. You can't just waltz in just because you know, it's the gym. If there are curtains there and there's privacy there. Allah says you got to do two things. What are they? Number one is sickness. Musou you have to give a hint that you're there. How do you do that? So in our day and age,
you would knock the door.
Let's say you don't knock the door.
Because in our day and age, because we got phones and all of that you text, Hey, is it a good time to come by?
And you don't say well, you know, you didn't respond in time. So I just showed up, you got to wait for a response. That's a steepness. Give a hint that you're there. Or that you're coming over whatever that may be. So whether ring a doorbell or send a message, give them a call ahead of time. Let them know that you're coming. This is what Allah subhanho wa Taala says, what you do when you visit anybody's house, even if it's your own parents, don't just Walton now again, I understand totally, you can say to me, you know, brother Musleh I get it. But trust me, I can go over to my parents house anytime they tell me to come over anytime I want. So I just go they even gave me a key
to their house. So I can just waltz in whenever I want.
Yeah, that's fine.
Take these advocates with you.
Hey, Mom, sledding, I'm coming over in about an hour. Okay, bye.
That's a sickness, you've got to do something. Now, quick question. Why? Why should you give a hint that you're coming? Why should you do that?
What's the obvious reason?
privacy.
Privacy, that's it. Anything that privacy means? That's our place of privacy.
You know,
used to have this problem
I used to have this problem where when I first when I finished studying in Medina came back and I started traveling, people start to get to know me and my work
these to follow me to my car, and even one time a brother, I'm sitting in my car in a parking lot and I'm leaving an event. And he came and he opened the door and sat in my car and this is checked, I have a question.
And I'm looking at this guy, I'm like, first of all, get out of my car.
Just just waltz in here. This is my place. This is my space, you can't just walk into my property. And that's one scenario. Aside from that one, I used to do exorcism and little PA. I used to have people knocking my door one and two o'clock in the morning. And some of them will try to open the door.
So this for me, it's it's like at hamdulillah Thank God it's it's there.
How you choose to follow it is where the problems will be to what extent and can level of consideration are you willing to give his fitness even to the people closest to you? Because at the end of the day, even if it's your parents, you don't know what state of privacy they are in before you got there.
Everybody with me so far? That's a sickness. Anything to hint you're there or you're coming over? Cool number to set up.
We'll just send any more
and say sorry, to the people in that home.
If they're not Muslim,
what do you do?
You do to here? You just greet?
A nice greeting whatever that greeting is. Hello. Hi. Good morning. Hey, how's it going?
You send the tax Hades. So can I come by when you go there greet don't just go to only your friend the daughter the son of the parents are walking there is no no to suddenly more via Allah is saying at least bare minimum. Say hello to the people of the home be courteous and respectful to the people in that house. And I think that's common sense. Okay, go back to the I
then come higher. Oh la,
la la come to the corona.
Valley come higher. Hola como, that is so much better for you. If only hopefully Insha Allah, you'll take the time and actually remember this stuff.
You see how perfect and beautiful this ends? Because Allah is telling to that kid or to at least remember because it's the first thing that most people forget, especially when you go to homes that you visit frequently. These are the simple things that you often will forget. So Allah says that Corona try to remember this stuff. You know, there was a time when the Prophet alayhi salatu salam went over to a companions house.
And he knocked the door
and he said a setup more of a comb. Why not? Allahu wa Barakatuh you waited what the process of them did is this I'm going to demonstrate it to you imagine this is a door he saw Allah Hardy was some this data kits of how he would go to anybody's house. First thing
he would stand by the door. He would knock the door once so one not would not be no one not would be
you know just whatever is normal, right? Don't
I'm still on my one knock. No, just few knots. That's one then he sallallahu alayhi wa sallam will step away from the door.
And wait
there was no time limit specifically just use your judgment you waited Why did he step away from the door?
should be obvious why step away from the door
somebody came and knocked at your door or your house and you weren't expecting them there and you open the door
and there was somebody you know muted word expected and didn't you you're not exactly dressed. Your house looks like Hurricane Andrew went through four times.
So why do you step away from the door to respect the privacy?
You don't know how he or she will answer that door because they're home that I have to always go run and get dressed just to answer their home. So you respect that sort of process seven which was stand away from the door.
Nobody answered the Prophet it so it was salam did it again.
And he did this three times.
Nobody answered. So the sooner is three attempts is all you get
that's
the fourth attempt or anything beyond three
you use your discretion. But the Shetty teaches us don't go above three if you don't have to. So for example, if you're checking up on an elderly person who's living alone and you You're there to check on their well being and you not three times and nobody's answering you don't just walk well, okay. Well, Francis said this, because why? You don't know if something happen. This person is an elderly person you don't know they fell off their bed, they're sitting on the floor, something terrible could have happened. Use your discretion, anything beyond three. But if you just go into somebody's house, you know their home, but you're knocking two or three times that there's no answer. The
prophet Ali subtle Islam walked away. Our version of that is you can probably text Hey, you came by so and so time I rang the doorbell but nobody answered. So. Let me know when you guys are home and go and leave.
Do you and I have the right to not answer the door?
Can you intentionally just ignore?
Is that a form of lying or being dishonest?
Is that your home? Somebody knock your door.
You're a Muslim. Can't just pretend you're not homie. Kids because kids
don't move. They'll go away. Just know. Okay, they're gone. Is that a form of line? It's coming. Just wait. It's coming.
So remember these two rules. By the way, when the Prophet alayhi salatu salam did that after the third he walked away.
Eventually those who were at home
realized, wait a minute, that was the prophet of Allah. They came rushing to the door er rasool Allah wa Alico masala ma rahmatullah wa barakatu.
And the pharmacist was already walking away. There's so much to take out of this incident, because one pharmacist thinks that Mr. alikoum,
but they're not responding to him. Can you do that?
They didn't respond to Him, until they realize when the man was walking away. So Allah how to send an old that's the that's the Messenger of Allah will open the door. And when they called him back, and they allowed him to come in the prophet at least, didn't say, why didn't you respond to my salah? Don't you know who I am? Can't do that to me. From system, it's not even mentioned. He just went into the house and he went for the reasons he went for. That's it. So what do you learn from that as well?
If you know someone's home, you're like, their car is right there in the driveway. The lights are on. I can hear a voice, but nobody would answer the door.
You don't get to leave a note to me, like thanks for being my best friend. Never again Salam aleikum. You don't get to do that leave. You don't get to class do that. And social media don't do nothing. And you certainly don't have the right to hold that against them.
Period. Why that's their place of privacy. You don't know. If the husband and wife must have been having the biggest fight of their marriage before you came. You don't know what kind of stress and what kind of problems are happening. You don't know anything about that house. So this is where hosting oven and thinking positive comes into play. So the Prophet Ali's thought was them was an example of that. And he never scolded anybody for not responding to his son. He didn't even say to anybody, why didn't you answer the door your home? You should answer I don't know. He understood Salalah Hall it was said you just never know how people are in their homes what they're dealing
with. So leave it alone. Case closed.
Then compiler left home Lila come to the corona so everybody understand now the advocates of how to go to someone's home. Now what does this have to do with gender interaction?
Look at the A at the bottom
Yeah, let Mohawk in a tell our young women to refuse to do.
This isn't suited for sealant. Allah subhanho wa Taala says
Allah knows with deceives the eyes and is concealed in the chest. So let's put this and connected back to our subject gender interaction, walk into somebody's home. And they're sitting there they were invited. So they sat there. This A is now
starting the process that if you're going to have to control what you see in what you do when you're in somebody's house how you do sometimes you'll have a guest over and wonder sitting in your home. They'll do this.
Nice curtains you have there.
That's a nice bulb. Who's in the kitchen? Oh, hi. So I'm on a call. Oh, you're not dressed? Well, okay, I'm so sorry. I didn't know. That's a nice carpet. Can I use your bathroom to go in your bathroom? Oh, my God. Gillette, full head and shoulders can believe they use this. Yeah, that's the problem. So Allah prepping us for that area of lowering and controlling the eyes. When you step into somebody's house, that's the first subject Allah introduces this whole subject in this and watch where it goes. Next Allah then says the host has rights to take a look the next day 11 tecido fi
if you if there is no one home for that said Hulu had Vennela comm don't just enter it until you have permission granted to you. So yeah, just because you have a key to the house doesn't mean you get to just waltz in
just because you have a key just because you know the code no less is dumb to ever enter until you're given permission.
What in EULA Komodo to follow Giro and if it was said to you, listen to the wording. Okay, listen to the wording. If it's said to you ever Giro
if it said to you leave Photojojo then leave so that host
says to you
it's 9pm because you leave tired.
You know in some cultures, that's like in any law, he went in the illegal Roger onto the relationship. Oh my god, you're, you're telling us to leave.
That's it. I'm never going to visit this home. I'm never going to talk to you guys again.
And Allah is saying the host has every right and they don't even have to be polite ever. Jerell just go. Okay, can you leave?
They have every right to do that. You know why?
You know why? They don't have to be courteous. Yeah, be like, Okay, I'm going to go pack some snacks for you when you're on the road. And then you guys can leave. Is that okay? Let me go. Do nothing.
Okay, look, it's getting late. Maybe we'll meet again another day. They have every way. My question to you is why? Why do you think that is? Why does the host have the right to just say, Look, just leave.
Even if you might think it's rude or disrespectful.
Why is that not a problem? In the sight of Allah? Why do you think just put yourself in this scenario, which yourself monastery somebody comes to your house? Unexpected, but you let them in. And they're sitting there to talk about their day is going on and on? And you're just like,
oh, I worked 14 hours today. Lola. I didn't even start cooking. I didn't even have dinner. Yeah. Oh my God, my eyes are shutting down. So people have some hosts. They give you the sign, right? They're like, yeah. Oh, Mashallah. Okay.
They start yawning and this then that person just keeps going on 12 o'clock, one o'clock in the morning, there's still going, Why does those have the right to just say look, leaf.
Because, again, you don't know how that person is feeling? What they've gone through what they're coping with. You don't know anything about that day, how it was for that individual before you got there. You don't know. You see how much courtesy and consideration these a yet have? That so many cultures have lost. They've lost it completely.
There's some cultures you never leave before midnight. It's just the culture. You go over to anybody's don't. We don't care if they're sick and they're disabled doesn't matter. We never leave before midnight, because that's the culture we stay there till early hours in the morning. You don't get to do that.
Especially when the host says just go. Look at the verse ever Giro just get out, go enter to go back where you came from. It'll geo from beracha go back where you came from. So they can literally say that and they have every right to do it. Then Allah says Who else can I let come? That is pure for you pure for who?
Who is you referring to here?
The guest in other words, listen to the house and go it's better for you. Because trust me, the host will be like they took that well.
You know what I'm going to do next time next time, I'm going to invite them for dinner. Because they were they were they were considerate. They were nice about that. I'm going to make it up another time. It was just bad timing for them today. So the host as well as it's better for you don't worry.
Respect their rights, respect their privacy, respect their home.
What law Hobi that term and owner Eileen,
Allah is fully non is fully knowledgeable of what you do.
Okay, they start they come to napkin and said, Hello, booton There is no harm for you to enter commercial properties. You know, this is talking about, you know, sometimes when people are working night shifts, they're in the warehouse. And if they work long, long hours, they might even just sleep there. So Allah is saying here, even for commercial properties, okay, that's fine. You have a shift, you've got to enter in, you've got to scan you don't have to knock back is anybody there? No, no, building is empty, the lights are off, but your shift is begun. Those are exceptions to all of this. So Allah highlights that as well. In which there is utility for you, you have a reason to be
there you have. So it could be a store, a warehouse or airport or office, all of these things. Via Rama schooner tiene fi hematol lecom. What la Hui are the moment to be doing a woman, Allah knows the things that you expose and the things you hide. So
these, as so far are all a protection from the first subject.
Remember, we talked about zener? All of these yet, essentially go back to the same topic.
You could walk into somebody's house and see something you're not supposed to see.
You're not supposed to see. No.
I could remember. years ago,
this brother went over to a family's home.
And they were polite, they let him in and so on.
And as soon as he sat down for maybe five minutes, he said, You know what, I'm going to leave, I'm gonna leave.
And the host them were shocked. What are you gonna leave? You just got here? What happened? is like, no, no, I just, I really have to go.
And what ended up happening is, they had their laundry basket,
sort of out, and it was exposed. And you can see, you know, everybody's clothing, under under clothing in the laundry basket. So where this brother was sitting, although the hosts are here, it became a fitna for him
to see that. Because again, it's someone's privacy. But the host them didn't realize that he think about all of that. So when he saw that, he took it upon himself. Why because Allah knows what you expose in the things that you're hiding. Allah knows when your eyes are stealing a glance. So somebody could be like that and they see the laundry resin.
They wear those colors.
And then shaitan rips you to pieces. These yet are all intertwined and connected to ultimately protecting all of us from falling into the footsteps of Showtime.
Subhanallah now they are going to get into some nitty gritty, you guys with me so far?
Is everybody okay?
You guys want to stretch or something? Or you're fine? Okay, yeah.
Doesn't matter, it's all the same solicitors doesn't matter. Your home is your home. No one has the right to your home, except the home the owners of that home. The residents of that house, you have full and complete control of who you decide to answer the door for and who you don't. Period.
Okay. This is this is how just our demons, it protects you.
And it protects the people that are out there coming towards you. And in between that protection, it's also protecting you from the little things. You're protecting your eyes, protecting you know your tongue that you might get engaged in a conversation privately in that home that you normally wouldn't have talked about elsewhere. Like I just came over because I really wanted to talk to you face to face. I didn't want to do this on the phone. But you won't believe what happened to just keep it here. I was never here but you're home by the way I'm leaving protects you from all of that.
Now with that frame of mind. So now you know the eyes are pretty big deal.
Your actions, your
your position and where you go and where you are and all of that
All of this is now connected to this a verse number 30. This is the last area we'll look at for today.
I think
this is huge. Now we get into the heart of this discussion. All that we've just gone through is just the introduction. Now, this is the heart of the discussion, this conversation of the laws of attraction in Islam, gender interaction starts here. So all the questions that you might have of shaking hands with the opposite gender, or just giving high fives
you know, following a somebody opposite Genet following them on social media, if you like his or her post, you send them a heart. Is that a stock federal law heart? Or is it just a digital art? Like, does that count as something? What if he or she takes it the wrong way? And you're like, Oh, my God, they actually liked my picture. Maybe they want to get married?
I don't know. Maybe people do that. I don't know. But they take it as more than just they liked your picture. They liked your image. I liked your post. Are you even allowed to do that? So all of those questions that come in between we're going to address all of them now. Okay. Starts off with men. Verse number 30, is all of the rules and etiquettes of men and how they interact with the opposite gender.
Follow me.
Number one,
unless this whole
tell, that's our first lesson.
So look, I broke it down here, piece by piece.
Say, who's Allah talking to?
Every time you see portal, who's Allah talking to? Say, who's asked to say what
was Allah speaking to?
The I'm hearing it the prophet, the prophet Ali sought to sell. So the first lesson here in this area, is Allah did not say yeah, you had Latina men or people have you met Allah says, Paul. He's adding a third party into the conversation now. You messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam go and say to the Companions, what I'm about to reveal.
My question to you is why? So could say beside it, I want you to write down.
Why? Why did why does the process even have to do that? Why didn't Allah just give a direct order in some of these rules.
So say, beside it, you can earn a
it is to honor the Prophet Alayhi Salatu was Salam
to honor him in terms of respect and listening to his instructions. So every time he is told to say something on behalf of Allah, that companions in turn, respect the promise, I said him and value, what he's saying, because it's coming from him from Allah. So we respect him as how we respect Allah, we submit ourselves to these instructions, because we know he's delivering it from Allah. So that love and that appreciation increases now for the prophet or at least.
The second point why this is started up with say,
this is really interesting.
Can you imagine
if you went up to a guy, right? Anybody, your brother or friend or whatever, and you said to them, Hey, man,
I saw you looking at her.
You're, you're like staring at her.
Or I saw you, you were going through all of her pictures on your phone.
You got to lower your gaze, man. You got to control your eyes. Okay, it's hard on
how would he feel?
How would somebody if they are not willing to accept your advice? You say, I'm just giving you an awesome man, just giving advice.
I saw you looking at her. You were looking at her the wrong way. Just giving you advice. Okay. Hopefully he doesn't punch you in the face. And say, Why are you accusing me? You have no right to judge me like that.
So it's a sensitive topic. You can't just approach it all the time. Yeah, I see you. You guys are watching. You'll winked at her. You blinked at her. You can't do that you're stalking her. Relax. There even second reason why the props I sent him has been to do this is that it's also teaching us that sometimes. You may not be the right person to remind somebody about their ice. Somebody else has got to do it.
Someone else has to do
you know, I teach the youth
and I from time to time I have to do this
I could see when they're texting or when we break for Sala,
him and her would sort of meet. I mean, it's obviously, pre COVID they would meet in a corner, exchanged numbers or smile or whatever.
And sometimes I would tell them, but most of the times, you get a quick little call to mommy and daddy, look, I saw your kid, it's my duty as the teacher to say, inform you, are you aware of this?
And then leave it to the parents to handle
men Subhanallah the things that by doing that,
that sensitive approach on a topic like this is eliminated, you're not going to offend nobody. And you're leaving it on those who are most appropriately dressed.
So coal is really important in how you approach the subject. Okay, next point. Look at the next word, little meaning to believers.
Not too little mostly mean
not to Muslims. Allah said believers, students, what's the difference between a Muslim and a movement?
Nobody answers this you're all expelled
Good.
Good matters of the heart. Moltmann Muslim is everything on site you guys agree? I agree. Perfect.
So here's your next point.
You're gonna love this. You're gonna love this. Because I promise you most Muslims don't think about this subject this way.
Allah said little meaning people who have Amen as a quality in them.
Meaning the only way to control what you look at
is a reflection of your Eman. You have to have a man to do this.
You have no Eman. You will not be able to control what you look at.
That's why Allah says believers
you know sometimes when we hear about this subject, someone will say to you all you know what you got to do.
You've got to just walk away.
You know what you got to do the next time you look at someone huddled in a haram way are you looking at something haram? If you're just keep clicking those websites, you know, you got to do pray Torah cards and ask Allah to protect you from shapefile. That's all shaytaan
Don't be friends and never talk to the opposite gender ever again, just stay away. You know, that's a problem when you tell that to a student who goes back to class the next day, and he or she is in a mixed classroom. It's a problem when you're working with other people. It's a problem when you go to the mall if you go to the store you go everywhere.
So that's not practical.
So how do you resolve this? How do you keep your eyes and yourself under control? In any situation? Where that temptation from the opposite gender is there? The first answer the poor n is highlighting for you and I is
your Amen. Your Eman has to kick in and be like no, I fear Allah not gonna look
at stop at the traffic light and she's crossing by.
Look, I'm just gonna concentrate on. I fear Allah.
If you have this,
there is not a place on this planet except that Allah will bless you to survive.
Not there's not a place anywhere. You could be in on any group, any committee, any workplace, any classroom.
And if you have Eman and you know how to use it in situations like this, you will survive everything you'll get through.
Prophets are least taught wassalam says the first glance you're forgiven for
the second one is from one
from shaitan.
So which means the first one is gonna happen. You're going to notice stuff, you're going to see stuff.
So it's going to happen and don't think you're going to eliminate it's never going to be eliminated. It'll always come in front of you.
If you take that first glance and you add more to it, you add more. That's where this comes in today. I know you're
The man will stop controller. So if you don't have strong faith or at least an ounce of Amen
then you will not be able to control what you see. And as we said to you earlier, you don't control what you look at you cannot control what you do
every shameful behavior sprouts from what people visually look at and see
little meaning
next you guys with me so far?
Yeah well Domina sorry him he's gonna answer maybe some questions that you might have or things that you've been thinking about or even things you've heard. Yeah, hold on man. I'm sorry. Reduce some vision. So now Allah remember specifically talking to men but the women will get the same message in the next day.
Yeah, hope to Allah says that when you look at the opposite gender, what do men Upsala him reduce some vision
do you notice something about the language in this area?
Allah didn't say Close your eyes.
Allah didn't say if she's there Look over there. Yes sister while they call masala Are you still there? I can't tell.
Please speak but what can I do? You know, Allah didn't say look there Allah didn't say behind the wall
What does Allah say?
You know do mean up saw to him means I can't do this to you. So I'm going to do it to them. Okay. But pretend one of the sisters are there right? This is Allah saying don't do this. You just stare
really?
Students online? This is a less don't do this when you're talking to the opposite gender.
Hmm, really? So you went to the masjid
wearing that? habia Mashallah.
I like your makeup by the way.
That's that's when you're when you don't have a whole domain upside. Allah says Don't stare.
Revert in our language. Don't be creepy.
Is there be lost? You know how some people when you meet them for the first time, they can tell you everything about what you were wearing? Like, you know, you you met at a coffee shop somewhere? Like yeah, when I was there, I saw you wearing this hijab, this shoe this socks this? Everything they can tell you officers don't do that.
Reduce your visit limit what you're looking at. So yes, you can look at the opposite gender when you're talking to them. I can look at the sister when I'm talking to her. The Prophet alayhi salatu salam would look at the women when he spoke to them and they spoke to him. He would look at them. You know, there was a caretaker in his masjid. And she had died in the process didn't wasn't there. He was on an expedition. So when he came back, he asked for so and so.
The caretaker, some of us have his didn't know you know how what he did. He said, The woman with the dark cheeks, which by the way, tells you that she wasn't wearing what
she was wearing the club
during the time process for him to describe the color of her cheeks. But also, he would see her face when he heard that she had died. He prayed a Janessa for her immediately was devastated by her loss. She was a kind woman she was a helpful woman. She was the caretaker.
So that's one instance another woman another woman came to the office they said to me she said your suit Allah give us some time. So we have questions that we want to ask you allocate some time for us, the women.
The process them didn't say okay, look, I want you to build a wall and get behind it. We'll figure out how we communicate No, the profits it starts with some folder choose a day of the week and that will be your time.
He held sister only classes. Another woman came to process them said y'all rasool Allah and she asked him a really personal question about her menstruation, her period. And he said to her, she described it in details had Ethan behind. Now just imagine, imagine this, a woman comes to him face to face. And she describes what her state is to his face on the lahardee was solemn.
So she has the rasool Allah this is how I clean myself and I shower and so on. Is this okay for Salah and the prophets are
I slept with some explains to her how she should shower when she comes off of her period. He tells her what she should do.
She said Yasuda ly don't understand. So the process seven explains it a little bit more.
Remember face to face? Like how often do you hear about that where a sister will go up to an imam? And describe herself like that? There's a letter, there's all the obviously that level of shyness, right? She has to find a different way to us. But this woman known
and the process, tell him didn't say, Have you no shame?
Why didn't you send your son TAS this question? No, he started answering her.
And he responded, but the process that I've had to limit she asked three times you have a slide I don't really understand explain to me more. How do I actually do that? How do I clean myself? Then he eventually said, You know what, go ask Asia. For the Allah Who shall explain to you. So that was that limit? Well, my point you get my point. So the next time you go to the grocery store to Walmart, what have you. And there's a female cashier there, or the opposite a male cashier there. You don't say our words a bit. Let him in the handle cashier, you know, and you go over somewhere else? You don't you don't have to do any of the Allah did not say don't ever look. Because part of
your advocates when you're talking to somebody is you look at them. But when you do control that
it's not an A for everyone, by the way.
Because you need people who are mature and responsible to understand this. And it starts off with what? Amen.
Everybody with me? Next?
Why follow Farrugia home and protect the privates? Whoa.
That's a pretty big jump.
You went from controlling your eyes
to now the privates?
What does that even mean? But why did we go from one end? All the way to the other?
The answer?
This is where the poor end does not give you details of things. You don't need to know.
The nitty gritty that happened in between not mentioned. Why? Because those are details that you don't need to know what just happened here.
I give this example a lot. Some of you probably might have heard me give this example. He goes to a conference walks into the conference hall. And there are sisters there behind the table, checking the tickets and registering everyone.
So he hands his ticket over Selam Aleykum sister when it comes down my brother Welcome to conference zone so your name so he registers he gets this ticket back and he's like, what's your what's your name? Sister? You did a real excellent job in ticket collecting martial law Tabata call I don't want to give you evil eye but martial law by the way, sister now that I'm hearing to go pray he doesn't need to pray by the way. But you see what he's doing. He's trying to get what going
What is he trying to do? spark a conversation because he's attracted somehow he's on my show. He's he sees a match Allah in front of it.
So he wants to turn the mashallah into a business. Right? So he wants to take it a step further. So he's like I was just doing can you? where's the where's the prayer hall? She's like, well, that's actually right at the back. Okay, man, I've never been here before. I hope I find just, uh, could you just like, just show me directly where I need to go. All of this is unnecessary. But he's got an agenda. He goes in he doesn't need to pray. He just does pull off a few times. He comes back out. Zach Hello, hiring sister. Thank you, for my love reward you as well for my prayer, everything. You know, I'm really glad that you guys are here. And he just takes the conversation more and more and
more until he's like, You know what? I'm,
I'm new to Islam.
I'm looking for somebody to just like connect with. Maybe ask some questions. You look like a practicing person. Is there some way that we can stay connected? Can I have your fax number?
Nobody uses that, by the way, right? Can I have your email? And then the email turns into something turns into something. Are you on Facebook? Okay, can you add I'll add you Is that okay? Can I stalk you on Instagram? And it goes, that's what happened. So Allah is saying, from the eyes. If you don't control that, then ultimately where is it heading?
That could be weeks, months, even years. There's no timeline here. And that's why Allah says why I follow Flo Jo.
So yes, when you look at the area, and you stare at it, apparently it appears as though it's a huge jump. A lot of things have to happen in between. But for obvious reasons, they're not highlighted. So that's why Allah says this. Still on this conversation this is primarily to the men is for them. Your eight sisters coming next. But then Allah says Here is why you men got to make sure you control this desire, the lust and the thirst to look is why you got to do it. This is why you got to control that lesson Valley get escala home that is pure for them.
How is that pure?
So we know what Tez kiya is.
So how does controlling all of this
purify you?
The answer is very simple.
You can troll this.
And I'll speak to everybody right? Brothers and sisters, but more soul brothers. More so the brothers online. You control what you look at you will find yourself you'll able to you'll you'll be able to concentrate better, pray better. You will excel in your studies at school in life. You know it will pay you marshy, mahalo says person who does not
control their eyes,
from Xena from eventually leading to Xena because we know the eyes also commit a form of Xena from system says I name yes near even the eyes, they commit their own type of Xena, the IRS commit their own typos in it, and we don't pay you. For him. Allah says that.
If you don't protect them,
then you will lose all of the humility that you have with the people closest to you'll start to dislike your parents, your relationship, your marriage, everything will be destroyed. You'll even your financial situation will decrease or profit at least Soto son told us that as well. Baraka is removed from your life,
you'll suddenly start struggling in life, you'll find no piece. And even in extreme cases that no claim Akima Allah mentions, it could even ultimately lead to some form of bloodshed like people will go literally out of their minds. That's why you know, there's a few documentaries online where you can look at former inmates. And there was one inmate very famous did an interview and the interviewer asked him what's the one thing that was shocked you about prison life that you learned about prison was the one thing you blew my mind what he said, says everybody in the prison system had one thing in common before their life and even during their time in prison. They were all
addicted to pornography.
All of them.
And, you know, it was really interesting how he recognized and made that connection to some of the vicious crimes. They lost a sense of care and sensitivity sensitivity for people. Because that's what pornography and other things make someone do. You eventually you don't look at people as people anymore. He becomes like this animal. Anything that stimulates him.
He doesn't see a woman anymore. She's an animal. That's That's all he can do. When you become desensitized that way, then it leads to other problems. That's why Allah says especially you men, you will be purified. The most effective way in the purest of ways if you can hold on to this in Allah Javi Ruby manual snare Hoon
ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada then concludes and this is what we will conclude with as well. In the Lucha boom be manual snarling. Allah is fully well aware of all that you manufacture.
One of the best ways to understand an area
when you're studying an area is always pay keen attention to how a verse ends.
Because 99% of the time how the verse ended, explain why it began the way that it did. So the beginning will always be connected to the ending. This ended Allah is fully well aware of what you manufacture. Remember that Allah is aware of the eyes when they steal. So when he's listening to the speaker, but his eyes just kept doing this.
Sisters are over there. I
suddenly got a cramp every three seconds. Ah.
That's all
In a Teleri, stealing the glands, Allah says, I'm watching all of that and I'm counting all of that against you as well. So crown Allah.
Allah says yes, neurone. So conclude with this. Yes, nine comes from the word sooner. Sooner means construction. When you're building something from the ground up,
Allah says, I know what you're putting together, when you talk to that, the reception at the table there,
when you came to the conference, that I know what you were trying to do, Allah is also counting and paying attention to his agenda,
why he's really talking to her,
why he's really trying to stay connected.
Allah knows what he's putting together.
And sisters,
this area is really and truly a protection for you. That you're you don't become vulnerable to the tricks, and to the eloquent language, and the attractive smile and all of those things that men are really good to utilize to their advantage, you'll get caught up in that.
Because ultimately, if you fall for that stuff, especially young teenagers, then they lead to a relationship where they think it's this is my life, this is where I'm going to be. Unfortunately, some sisters really make the grave mistake, you know, the commits in our they'll get pregnant and their whole life becomes a life of regret.
Allah is saying that he's watching and he's accounting, everything that he's planning. So your lesson from this area is, these are tools for you to keep in mind. Don't let those who utilize this area to their advantage. Take advantage of you.
Next week in sha Allah will be the sisters a CSA is quite long because it has all of the categories of people that you are allowed to remove your hijab in front of.
So we're going to look at each of those categories. They have some fish behind it, so we're going to study that as well. So we're going to spend a large portion of next week's session on that area, and then we'll connect the two together. Okay, guys, so may Allah azza wa jal continue to teach us I hope you guys appreciate what this is and what it does for all of us what it's taught us and may Allah azza wa jal protect us from all forms of Zina, especially in these times where it is prevalent. Everywhere we go and anywhere return we are always being tested with this subject. So may Allah protect us all? Allah Subhana Allah who will be having a show to Allah hayleigh and stuff,
it'll go to WWE Lake students online. Thank you for your attention and your time. And just once again, a reminder, please do check your accounts. Around Sunday or Monday I will upload the next handout, as well as there will be a short quiz for you to take Okay, so that more people more to learn Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh