Alima Ashfaq – Reaping the Rewards of Ramadan
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Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah salam alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu to all the sisters or maybe if there's any brothers as well as joining us today, I would like to welcome you to one of the sessions that we are going to have this week with Bing me and twins have faith
in sha Allah today we are going to discuss a topic that I think every year we try to emphasize on this topic because sometimes it can be confused relating to this topic or it's something that we are just not clear with. Inshallah today hamdulillah I'm so happy finally I managed to get this closer and you might Ashfaq with this. She is based in the UK Hamdulillah we managed to get her not in Malaysia, I think it was in Canada that she came for one of the big conference. And finally that I actually invited we invited him for being me maybe I think five years ago as one Allah we we invited center in Venezuela that time because due to her pregnancy and everything she she was not able to
travel and come attend for the being me here in bomdila. Today we are very, very honored that we've managed to have her with us. Join us today to give a bit of clarification regarding this topic of especially during Ramadan even outside of Ramadan is something that not just sisters that should understand even the bread is it's an issue that every one of us should understand as well.
Is basically will be a topic that we'll discuss on what the things that sisters are able and not able to do when they are going through menses during the month of Ramadan. And even during childbirth there are certain things that we are not allowed to do. And insha Allah
says it Mahesh will be doing some discussion on this topic. Besides Oh Salima Ashok has been with a he she is one of the instructor for Islamic Open University. I owe you and she is currently based in the UK and one of the she is also a founder of the Muslim Renaissance i i guess it's based in the UK as well. And she actually is I'm not sure it's currently happening but they actually she she has a conference running
going on as well in the UK right now. If there's anyone here that's based in the UK maybe you can have a look at all sizes Alima social media pages. Without further ado, I would like to invite Salima Ashok and inshallah we just discussed on this topic cycle. I need to send our our kids How are you?
Really good 100
Inshallah, I would not want to take more of your time. Let's just go ahead with this topic inshallah.
So we'll start it Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam, ala Rasulillah was a heavy whistling woman with a prohibition of masonry. When you see Lee Emery with little oak, the terminal Disseny were yeska who called me, Allah, Allah to Allah, He says in the Quran, and I want you to think about these verses deeply. Allah is one of the other six it's sort of 12 o'clock. Yeah, usually seen him and put him in a coma for him. Okay, make up about renaming complete, come, come, cool. A lot of catalysis that fasting has been prescribed upon you, and you're fasting right now. And why are you doing it? Because Allah Subhana Allah has blessed you and he has given you the will, and the desire
and the motivation and inspiration to fast without Alas, palata I know you wouldn't be able to do it. You know, and then Allah, Allah to Allah, He says, and this is interesting, he says in Surah Al Baqarah, in reverse after he says, we're in the sumo hydro Lidcombe in confronta, Allah moon and to fast is better for you, if only you knew. So he Allah subhanaw taala is saying that fasting makes you mindful. And he says that fasting is better for you, if only you understand. And then Allah subhanaw taala he gives women the periods he gives women, their menses, meaning despite these a yet a last parameter. hilar has something greater for you. He has something better than even fasting
during that time. And that's why even before I go into what you can do and what you can't do, it's really important to build a foundation of self worth. Build a foundation that this is what allows me to Allah has ordained and it's good for me and it's amazing. And I'm so grateful to Allah, Allah to Allah
but he makes me go through this, because it is a purification, it is a means of coming closer to Allah subhanaw taala based in how you perceive him. And therefore they say that, you know, I shall not be a lover and her, the beloved wife of the Prophet alayhi salatu salam, you know, she planned for years and years and years to go to hedge. And this mentioned in that little hurry, so now she goes to her, she's, you know, getting ready to go to hedge, and you know, she's there. And she comes on her period, she comes on her menses, and she turns around to the Prophet salallahu Salam, and she's so sad. You know, she's like, you know, Subhan Allah. And that's why it's okay to feel a bit
down and a bit sad, and we will go deeply into this. But here the Prophet sallallaahu Salam says, this is something that Allah Allah to Allah has ordained on the daughters of Edom Harlequin Salam, he links it to a great prophet, he linked it to the first prophet, that this is something that Allah subhanaw taala has given you, you know, it is good for you. And that's why the rulings come in. So a few points which will mention Allah subhanaw taala is fully aware of your reality, you know, he understands he appreciates, and he recognizes your desire to connect. And that's important. When you recognize that Allah, Allah, Allah is allowed in his own knowing his key is a semi overseer, things
become easy. So now you've, you know, accepted this reality. Now, it's like, I need to make my plan, I need to have a better understanding, I need to have knowledge on how I can make the most out of this month. And before we continue, one thing I want to mention, all the scholars have said that you need to record your cycle, you need to record your cycle. So even before Ramadan, you know, when you're coming on, you need to know, you know, so you know, there are many apps and you know, you may have a diary, write it down. And that way, by the way, if you have any issues arise with your cycle, generally scholars check the three cycles beforehand, and they determine, you know, whether you
should fast or not, you know, whether you're in st whether or not whether, you know, if you've gone a few days over what does it mean? So number one, even before we continue, record your cycle, and if all your life you haven't recorded your cycle, or you've been a bit easygoing with it, now's the time, you know, the number one record you cycle number two, be appreciative of Allah Sanatana because in Hadith country, Allah subhanaw taala is as we perceive him, you know, and we have to be careful not to project our in his insecurities on Allah subhanaw taala we also need to be careful that we don't compare ourselves to the brothers or you know, they're going to throw away because,
you know, and they're doing this and I don't have the chance to do this because your body they something beautiful and complex taking place. You know, we are the women who do and, you know, this is I'm generalizing and there are women who you know, may not have children, but on a general level, you know, we are women we are, you know, we we bring the next generation, you know, and Allah subhanaw taala has beautifully
put a process together for that to happen smoothly, inshallah. So Ramadan is a monk for everyone, okay. And that's important to understand. Ramadan is not just for men. Taraweeh is just not for men. Fasting is just not for men Quran. It's not just for men, it's for men and women, what you need, actually, if you need behavioral flexibility, what you need is you need pre planning what you need, if you need an understanding of your cycle, you know, and it's also for those who are ill for those who are grieving for those who you know, are going through period pains, and you know, subhanAllah This is the Mercy of Allah, Allah, Allah subhanaw taala is Al Hakim, and what we do is we take
wisdoms, many women go through extreme period pains, and it's so horrific you know, Subhan Allah, for some women, how merciful is Allah, Allah to Allah, that he's allowing you to take a break from your Salah and take your break from your fast, you know, Allah Subhana Allah is, you know, and headin Allah Santana is so kind, you know, and so redefining how you view Allah Subhana Allah and that that's generally what it boils down to. So being careful not to project your negative projections upon Allah Subhana Allah, because he is a lower dude, he loves you the most he has an understanding of your body. And some people will say he gives you a break. You know, he gives you a
break. Now sometimes I think about the brothers say never get that break. You know why? Because Allah Subhana Allah is holding them to such high standards, you know, in society that they can't afford to have that break, whereas women are also held to those high standards, but it is within their biology that they need that break for them.
oldie just so you don't get bent out. So there's a beauty to it. So a lot of times Anna is an Heike, and that's why it's Hannah law it's important to understand that Ramadan has branches that provide nourishment, Ramadan has, you know, it's like a tree. You know, there's, you know, many fruits come from it and that's why we need to discuss Ramadan is not limited to fasting. Ramadan is not limited to just the Quran. Ramadan is limited to the vicar, you know, Hanalei was thinking recently, whenever I don't have Quran on in my house, I feel like I've lost something. I feel like I'm at last like a week in the morning, and one hour has gone past and I'm just wandering around getting the
kids ready. And one hour later, I'm thinking, where's the Quran? Why have I not put this on, you know, subhanAllah, that Allah subhanaw taala, on the Day of Judgment, is not just going to look at your hand sculpted into your ears, he's going to look at your feet, he's going to see what you move towards. He's going to see what you saw, there are so many ways to worship allows me to either it's multi dimensional, you know, and even most of the personalities that I'm said, I have been sent with good character, you know, I've been sent to establish good character, you know, it's kind of a, that's why some people, they will come in the fast and they're swearing and they're shouting, and
they're abusing people. And those people, they don't gain nothing from their pasts. You are a person, you have the ability to redefine how other people view their day, you know, and that's powerful, and that's beautiful. So, we're going to discuss many ways that you can do that. So before we do that, one thing I want to discuss it from the mother hate perspective. So you know, from a Sheree perspective, there are four Imams, you know you have Imam Abu Hanifa Imam, Shafi, which I think a lot of Malaysian sisters are demonic. Mm hmm. Haven't been humbled. So, you know, each school of thought had different ways to derive rulings, you know, and every single ruling has a
goodness within it. So, the Hanafi, the sheffey, and the heavenly mother, who they see that a woman cannot recite, you know, a woman cannot recite the Quran, whereas the Maliki madhhab, allows a woman to recite the Quran within her menses, and some of the Maliki scholars even allowed a woman to touch them must have, and these are valid opinions. Like some of you may not have heard this, you need to choose that opinion, which is within your framework, but it's important for me to mention that to you, you know, otherwise we become like it's everything's black and white. No, Islam is absolutely beautiful, you know, and there is leeway in some areas. So here we went back to Allah, Allah to
Allah is a share fee, Allah Subhana Allah, Allah is the One who heals. And you know, that's why, you know, so even when you if you go to,
if you go to Amara in Ramadan, like you can't do the tawaf and you know, for many women, that's heartbreaking, but you know, subhanAllah, you can sit back, and you can remember Allah subhanaw taala, you can do to her, you can reflect upon your surroundings. You know, many times, when we think of the Kaaba, the caliber should be the greatest thing in the harem. But what we have, unfortunately, is we have all these great big buildings that also have overshadow the cover, but you have the ability to sit there and view it and, you know, see the magnificant magnificence of Allah subhanaw taala. And there's something beautiful. So once again, completely redefining,
you know, menses and becoming on your menses. And that's why now a shift to healing. So it's not that I'll be back here, she recorded that a woman came to the Prophet alayhi salatu salam, and she says, you know, what do we do, if men seeds, they fall on our clothes. And this is so interesting, she said, you know, take hold of the garment, and you know, where the blood is, and just rub it off, and then pray with it, and say, Hey, I'm Buhari, let's just literally like you've got some blood on your clothes. And that's like, you know, from a cultural perspective, you know, people like if you've been on your period, especially
other cultures, they have a tendency to see woman a woman as dirty, a woman is unclean, you know, the Prophet sallallahu sallam, and, you know, we, as in Islamic faith, we never, you know, see women in such an awful way women are our better, like all the the, our hearts, they are, you know, like our twin sisters, you know, we have to respect them, we have to take care of them. And that's for the past several months and and said in his last clip, but he says take care of your women, right? Take care of your women. And that's why so that's what you do. If you come a new period, you just, you just shrug it off, and you just pray again, and obviously like, you know, subhanAllah in our
time because, you know, we have access to washing machines and everything. We should watch our clothes and stuff but look at that.
A deed and look how it's not seen as something dirty and it's not seen as something clean. You just own your period just now you can read again, just wash it off and pray again. You know, and you don't have to isolate these women, you don't have to make them feel guilty. You don't have to feel make them feel bad, like it should be part of society. You know, and Allah that way, it's almost absurd that brothers, some brothers, of course, you know, by far, inshallah the majority not. This may not be the case, but you know, to just see menses as something unclean. Now, it's just part of a beautiful process of, you know, Allah Subhana Allah, and that's where we have
in Margem OKB, underlining the Omer he said, that Prophet sallallahu sallam said, no one should touch the Quran unless they appeal. And that's the evidence that the chef, and the chef agrees, and the handler needs us. And that's why as a chef,
Jose, and I will so and they said that the written Quran with you know, with major impurity, you know, they should, it shouldn't be touched. You know, and that's why some of the scholars have said, you can touch it with gloves, you know, if you're reciting. And that's why, you know, and this is interesting, you know, I shattered the Allah and her she said, I used to comb the hair of the Prophet it so that it's in him when he was when I was on my menses. In al Bukhari, meaning she was close to the Prophet alayhi salatu salam, you know, she was in close proximity, you know, there was nothing about, you know, she's ornamented, we can't be close, and we can't have that element of love
and that element of appreciation. And this is a beautiful marriage. And many times, I think, when we look online, and we see these notions of marriage, which are not real, we either go to the extreme where everything's hunky dory, and everything's love. Or we go to the other extreme, where everything's about controlling the women and isolating them to the home, no, the Prophet sallallaahu Salam was done. And he gave the women you know, a lot of time to and they gave women the hijab, you know, so they can go into society, and, you know, function effectively. Right? So now moving on, set alarms on its own, it is a Rockman and I'm always using the names of Allah subhanaw taala. So what
are you not allowed to do, women are not allowed to rip are not allowed to pray their salah, there is nothing wrong with you, sitting on the prayer mat and doing your tests be nothing wrong with that. And that's actually a good way
to reconnect with Allah Subhana Allah, and I know I'm a mother of three children. And I was trading system I had never, like, That's what I keep, you know, I have to keep my children inside this room as they go crazy. You know, I'm, that's me, it's really difficult to find time for yourself. But you must, you need to have that will and you need to have that desire. And that's why I mentioned at the beginning, you need to record your cycle. And the reason why you need to record your cycle is because if you're reciting the Quran, you know how many days you're gonna miss. So you can make up for it, Inshallah, okay, so women
and women who, who cannot pray,
we have to understand like when we look at Maria, mighty Sudan, and we look at her church, and we look at, you know, women in the Quran, Allah subhanaw taala specifically mentions these women and to raise you up. So now we're going to discuss
what if that worship, and I want to just mention a hadith where the Prophet sallallaahu Salam in an Buhari once again, where I shattered the Allah and her while she was during whilst she was in her menses, she would sit in the lap of the Prophet sallallaahu Salam, she would sit down the proximal Lamson, and you know, he would hold her close, because he loved her very much. So moving on, what can you do?
And what can you do? But before that is one thing about reflection, okay. I'm bringing in loads of headaches because that's really important. And this one just came to my mind where, you know, the Prophet sallallaahu Salam he said it surely ALLAH and her he said, Bring me a mat and I showed her the Allah and now she's like, I'm on my menses. And so he and Muslim at the office of allowance for them said like,
the mental sorry, I'm not in your hand. They're not in your hands. So just bring me them. You know, and that's it like you have to and you should go about your business and your worship in the best way. Okay, so now let's do point.
So number one is reframe and recognize that everything you experience is from Allah subhanaw taala. And that's what you need to ask yourself when you're on your menses. It's meant to be that period of reflection. Okay, what is the last panel to other teaching me about my my body? What is the last kind of to other teaching me about my experience, and I was
Sitting Monday now I'm feeling really ill today. And I'm actually finished the session a bit early if you don't mind the work but think I'm
not feeling that great, but I want to finish the slides. So ask yourself and that's what I'm asking myself right now. What is Allah subhanaw taala teaching me through this sickness? What is Allah subhanaw taala teaching me through my menses, what am I learning about my body. So everything is from Allah subhanaw taala number two, Allah, Allah to Allah is editable. So here it is a month to be mindful. And that's why it's the best place of your intentions is the heart. So Ramadan is the time to purify your heart to have a deep look inside and to start polishing it. And that's why it's a * of a hurry. You know, the Craftsman lumpsum says, very leaving the body that is a piece of
flesh, like smokey for flesh. And if it is sound, then the entire body sound, you know, truly it is the heart. So, within this month, you need to ask yourself, How am I purifying my heart? How am I displaying patience with my family members? How am I displaying shocking to my family members? How am I you know, what's my snip? Like, you know, what's my remembrance of Allah subhanaw taala like and that's my internet service book. Do you want Alaska modalities? Yeah, you live in North Korea law has a current que sera, you know, a belief is remember Allah subhanaw taala often in Ramadan, if that training round training ground and it's for the women who are on their menses as well. So I was
kind of to Allah is a local idea. And that's why we've come mid wave right now. So I don't know how you guys are feeling. Um, some of you may have been on your menses, some of you may be waiting is that you need to set lofty great intentions or you need to remind yourself that Ramadan is just the beginning. And that's why that's where we get caught up we think Ramadan you know, this is where we need to do everything. No Ramadan is just the beginning. If you haven't recited enough Quran, then post Ramadan, you should be reciting Quran you know, and yes, you may not you may not get the reward that you're getting in Ramadan, but you will familiarizing yourself with the Quran, you are working
on that relationship. So in sha Allah if Allah Allah Allah gives you life and toe feet, then you have a better Ramadan next year. Okay? And remember, make big intentions. Allah subhanaw taala even though he doesn't see he may not see great actions, because you may be a bit restricted with your menses, Allah subhanaw taala. Either, you know, he will reward you for the great intentions. Okay, so animoji Allah, Allah, Allah is the One who is so close. So Ramadan is a time of the DUA. If you haven't set your DUA list, make that dua list, okay. And it doesn't have to be I think what we do is we become so caught up with long, complex two highs, just make three, just make three and you know,
you don't even have to write them down. Just every time you get that chance. You know, make those two hours and go in the Quran and find the ones that work for you. You know, like you have Fei Li Sam, Robin Neely, I'm the Kavita and Phil Jana, and La ilaha illa, Allah subhanaw taala in the contaminants only mean like these two hands, they already in the Quran, they will benefit benefit you. A lot of Santa Ana is Anwar herb. So this is a month of silica. And that's where the Prophet sallallaahu Salam, he was generous anyway. But in Ramadan, he was the most generous. So once again, if you have written your cycle down, maybe in those three to five to seven days, you can be giving
sadaqa every single day, you know, and you're making them and that's your beautiful intention. I can't pray and I'm not reciting the Quran because I follow that opinion. But I'm going to do something to meet it. You know, I'm going to give a set of Allah, Allah to Allah is allocating reflect upon the Quran, and the transistor came to me and she said to me, she's like, every year I stopped the Quran, and then I never completed because I listened to a lecture and they're like, You need to understand every single verse that you're reading and I'm like, subhanAllah I get that point. But this Ramadan in Ramallah, complete your resuscitation, achieve that goal, because that
goal, you know, it will carry you to the next Ramadan, you know, achieving that goal will benefit you greatly. So recite the Quran and then get when you get the chance to listen to lectures, you know, listen to good, amazing lectures, and, you know, try and connect with your Quran a bit more. And then we have to gain knowledge once again, that can be done through your local Halaqaat. You know, there's usually reminders after taraweeh so, go and if you
Don't go to the masjid than listen to lectures on YouTube, we are so blessed, you know, Hamdulillah we have access to so much. So this is your chance to go. And, you know, increase yourself in knowledge and I'm telling you something on a personal basis, knowledge completely, like changed me, you know, Subhan Allah and it was actually in Ramadan, someone gave me a lecture of Sheikh Mohammed about regret, and I was only 15 and I started listening to it. And that is where this desire to please Allah subhanaw taala and it was born. So find something that touches your heart and allow it to propel us propel us spiritually. Okay, so we have an L bar, you know, to be an LP or is to be at
the service of people. So be at the service of your family and, and women are generally at the service of their families. So if you have any brothers here, then work together, you know, work together, if you're praying thoroughly every single day, there's no harm in like taking a step back. And, you know, taking your wife to taraweeh whilst you take care of the children. You know, that's, that's wonderful, and it is actually very beautiful, you know, and that's why Subhanallah I haven't played taraweeh in the messages for I'd say four or five years and I'm very content with that. You know, I have a three young children I know my time will come later. So I'm not going to allow myself
to become despondent. I can't blame the Terra accompli tarawih know like the whatever decision
you make, be content with it, and glorify Allah subhanaw taala that you have that opportunity to pray at home, and that's beautiful. And then do a thicker increase in the remembrance of Allah Subhana Allah, do your hand do you extend far you know, remember Allah subhanaw taala through his two hours, and Allah subhanaw taala will increase you and they say that the only thing that changes to Allah is
the only thing that changes because there is and there is a form of vicar. So increasing anytime you get time. And you know, subhanAllah like, the last few years I've completely focused on the Quran as my goal and I think my husband you hope whenever I'm walking, I've just got Quran and my lips. Like I'm just saying stuff I don't even really know what I'm saying. But all I know is I'm reciting some Quran and that's because you like you put your foot down and you said I want to I want to connect with this beautiful book. So engage in a vicar and also make a conscious choice not to engage in sin. We all think we all do stuff that we're not proud of this Ramadan make that intention that
you're going to stop one thing for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala and ask Allah Subhana Allah that you're doing it purely for him. So you know make your life easy for you, so inshallah more antibody fits. Okay. I will stop there. I hope I've clarified a lot of things as Subhanak Lahoma becomes a shadow and they're either learned or stuck for a while to blue like
the color hair? Is it okay, if you can answer this one question here.
Needs a clarification without I'll just put the question on the screen Sheila.
She says here, Asakusa. I had gone for a procedure to reduce my irregular bleeding. Sometimes I will get my period right at times I get it. But it's only for a day but comes back like on the fifth day, do I treat the PDD as period because I would make Ghosal after I stopped bleeding, which is like secondary. That's very complicated.
It is if you can tell the sister to message me if you can send her my email address. And because we need to ask her a few questions. We need to ask her about her cycle. We need to ask her about you know this there's loads of questions to determine a answer. So tell her to Insha Allah, if you pass my
if you pass my incident handle if you pass my email address or my whatsapp number, and then he shall I can ask those questions and clarify. Okay, I'm sure there was one thing that you mentioned earlier, I just want to make sure I hit
the one that you said about cardio, whatever it gives cardio is due in two hours. No, sorry. I said that wrong, though. I changes cover. Don't ask me this cut. Okay. So the art is the only thing that will change. Because that's predestination what Allah subhanaw taala has planned for you so make lots of dua.
Okay, okay. All right. I'm just get I got it. Wrong.
Yeah. hamdulillah if there is, sisters, if you have any more questions, you might want to post it right now so that we can just end the session and not take too much time.
There is only one more here it says, Are we allowed to recite the Quran from memory based on what Revelation during our menses?
So if you're if you follow the Maliki madhhab, then yes, the other scholars have a difference of opinion. Some of them said that yes, if it's from memory that you can recite, but you need to cut it up. So yeah, if you're, if you're a teacher, and if you will forget it, then you can recite the Quran. Or you can recite it under your breath, and just to stay connected.
And one thing I want to mention, I'll mention a few opinions I've been which people may benefit from so you know, how do you recite the Quran whilst you're on your menses is number one, you recite it from memory. So you recite it from memory, but you just conscious that you know, I'm on my menses, be careful that you don't touch them. And that if you following that, and if the chef EI and the hanretty opinion, there has to be a barrier between you and the Quran, meaning gloves and the cloth. And you can also check certainly unfrozen, he said, You can recite from your phone.
And these are like come to con, contemporary scholars that have come and given these rulings. And if anybody wants this morning, ishi chef in Tamia, he said that there's nothing in the Sunnah that forbids a woman from reciting the Quran in her menses, but that's an individual opinion. You know, so many sisters, they are very conscious of following their framework. Because that's what keeps them grounded. As a teacher. We never say to someone, oh, like you should follow this. You should follow that we say okay, first of all, if you follow a mother Him, follow your madhhab because we don't want you to become confused. But I'm putting this out there. So in the time of the Prophet
some amount of sudden in Tamia says there's no direct commandment. And when we can recite the Quran, just make sure you've got that barrier present and you don't teach the Quran whilst you're on your menses.
One, just one final one, she's asking, can we make good or during menses?
Yeah, you can make wudu but it doesn't purify you. If you're going to be like for example, it may be good to stay in the habit like I generally make wudu when I'm reciting the Quran because I'm just in that habit and I want to respect the Quran in a beautiful way. So yes, you can and it's you know, it's it's a nice thing to do.
Okay, I think that is all inshallah I would like to thank you again for taking your time to join us today.
May Allah grant you speedy recovery and make things easy for you. I really hope we can have you again join us again maybe for another session maybe after Ramadan during Ramadan itself maybe we can do we can cover a book maybe together
that's all put it today just
take care and then hopefully we can see you again inshallah. Salam Alikum to watch everyone.
Everyone just I would like to just inform you that during this Ramadan under we under mercy mission and charity right they are new programs that is supporting
a lot of people that is in need if you would like to
donate and help out the people that's a neat you can just go to our website, www dot resubmission that my or you can donate to the bank account here that I've stated here. The resolution bank account Don't forget we're gonna have another session on Friday insha Allah that is with Ahmed Kumar. He is in the cover on something more related to your our family and what we can do as a family together during my time.
There's always a lot there's a glare everyone's awake, go