» Earn on-going rewards and help us do more! «

Stability in Our Home

share this pageShare Page
Musleh Khan

Channel: Musleh Khan

Episode Notes

Jumu’ah khutbah delivered at the AlHuda Institute on April 10, 2015

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:02--> 00:00:03

In 100 illa

00:00:04--> 00:00:54

no matter who want to start you know who want to stop fiddle when our other billahi min surey and fusina woman say Dr. Molina, Mayor de la philomel de la la mejor glyfada her de ella. Y shadow Allah ilaha illAllah YW la sharika Why should one know Mohammed Abu what a solo sallallahu alayhi wa ala early he was herby woman so I learned what Mr. nebby sadhana de la yo Medina, bad for de la yo holla Bub faqad amarena subhanho wa Taala Phaeton cerium yeah you Hello Xena ermine otaku la hopko to quality wallet, Mouton, Illa, one to Muslim moon, some bird, my brothers and sisters.

00:00:55--> 00:00:59

There once was a time when our Prophet Mohammed Sall, Allahu Allah, he was suddenly

00:01:01--> 00:01:52

went and visited one of the mothers of the believers, and she offered him some honey. And he ate that honey. Later on that evening, he went and visited one of his other wives. And she could smell the odor or the aftertaste, she could smell some kind of odor from his mouth, and she didn't like it. And when she mentioned this to him, he responded to her and said, Okay, I will give it up. I will give up eating honey forever. All because his wife said to him that there was one thing she didn't like. He didn't say, Well, what is your problem? Why don't you like him? He didn't say to her, Well, too bad. This is my decision. I like it. Imagine a wife saying to you, I don't like that

00:01:52--> 00:02:02

shirt that you wear. doesn't look good on you. Normally what husbands do in situations like this is a little too bad. I like it. I'm gonna wear it anyways.

00:02:04--> 00:02:18

Sometimes my wife will say to her husband, could you hurry up? It's running late right now. No, just wait in the car an hour or two. And I'll come out when I'm ready. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, You don't like it? No problem.

00:02:19--> 00:02:22

There was one problem with this incident.

00:02:23--> 00:03:16

Everything that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam them does, potentially could be a religious doctrine. In other words, there's the potential that it could be an actual Sunnah. And the companions, and later generations, you and I, we could potentially practice the same thing. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is under a microscope that everything he says and he does, is being monitored very carefully. So he has to present or practice extra caution in the decisions that he make that he makes in his life. So Allah azza wa jal paused and reprimanded him for this action and asked them and said to him, yeah, you want to be sorted that the Hatem Allah azza wa jal reveals

00:03:16--> 00:04:00

to him. Yeah, you have to be this is a very stern method in Korean in addressing someone because you and I, we are accustomed to Yeah, you have Latina Emma No. Yeah, you hola Xena. Amano is not just oh, you who believe it literally a you her is a phrase to grab someone's attention. You're literally saying to them, Look, stop what you're doing. Stop walking, stop moving and listen and pay attention. Because what I want to say to what I want to say to you is of extreme importance. Allah singles out the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam from the rest of the world and says, Yeah, you have nabee limit to how to remove a halala willock

00:04:01--> 00:04:08

Why did you make something prohibited and how long that Allah has made permissible for you?

00:04:09--> 00:04:52

Don't stop eating honey. Because as a result, the rest of the Muslim world especially is going to stop eating honey. So don't do that. And Allah azza wa jal corrected the situation. This was really important, because what this teaches you an eye is that there are certain aspects of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam his lifestyle that isn't actually a Sunnah. It has nothing to do with religion. It just has everything to do with him. Being a human being the way he would scratch his head, the way that he might choose to sit down the choice of drink that he would have whatever the case is, those little things that make him or complete him as a human being isn't necessarily an

00:04:52--> 00:04:57

actual Hadeeth or a Sunnah that is enforced on you and I to practice. I'll give you an example.

00:04:59--> 00:05:00

Once there was a

00:05:00--> 00:05:22

group of companions that traveled from Medina to Mecca. And they took the same path that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam would take. Now this is after he had passed away. So one of the companions writing on his horse would come to an exact spot in this route. And he would slouch his head down.

00:05:23--> 00:06:05

And then for a few seconds, he would slouch his head down, and then he would continue his journey as normal. The rest of the companions saw him doing this and they asked him, Why did you slow your head down for no reason? He said to them, when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was alive, I took this journey with him. And there used to be a tree right here. And it had long branches. So whenever the process Allah was riding his horse, he would have to slouch down to go around these branches. Now the tree doesn't exist anymore. But he still wants to do that, to commemorate to practice what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam was doing so heinola they didn't leave anything out. Another

00:06:05--> 00:06:49

instance, that promise I sent him is leading Sala and he had his shoes on, and for no reason at least, that's what it appeared. As if there was no reason he took off his shoes. The companions are praying behind him, and so they take off their shoes as well. When the Salah was over the prophets, I send them turns around and he looks at them and says, Why did you take off your shoes? So they said, yeah, it also Lola, we took it off because we saw you taking it off. So we thought that Allah azza wa jal was inspiring you sending down revelation to you. And then he corrected them and he said, Look, the reason why I did that is because gibreel Allah His Sam came to me and Sala and

00:06:49--> 00:06:56

inform me that there was some filth or nudges on my shoe, and inform me about it. So I knew that I had to take it off.

00:06:57--> 00:07:06

Not every little miniscule thing he did was actually enforced as a Sunnah. So Allah pause them and corrected him.

00:07:07--> 00:07:16

The rest of the surah has everything to do with a second incident that happened between two of the wives of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam.

00:07:17--> 00:07:26

One day, he shared a secret with one of his wives. And he told her, don't tell the secret to anyone.

00:07:27--> 00:07:37

This wife eventually sat down with someone else it is incident It was said that it was between Russia and hafsa about the Allahu Allahu Allah.

00:07:38--> 00:08:03

So they sat down together, and one of them actually shared the secret with the other one, and said to her, look, the prophesies seldom told me don't say anything, but I really want to share the secret with you. So you promise me Don't tell anybody this secret, okay? And she tells them the secret. Then Allah xojo tells the profit side seller what had happened.

00:08:04--> 00:08:48

The secret that you told that person she went and she gave that secret to somebody else. So the prophesize sell them came and confronted this individual and says, confronted one of his wives and says, I told you not to tell the secret to anybody. And you went and you told a portion of this secret that someone immediately she responds and says call it men and Baca has a she asks the prophets I send them Who told you that I told somebody, do you see what happened? Instead of her taking the responsibility that she did it? She tried to shift the blame on someone else who was the one that did that. They're the ones that have the problem. It wasn't me. But then the Prophet

00:08:48--> 00:08:54

sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told her call and abet any li li will have

00:08:55--> 00:09:41

the one, the one who has the all knowledge the all series, the one who understands the one that has the hub of the news of every one of your affairs. He's the one that informed me, then Allah azza wa jal takes over the conversation and suta to him, and focuses his attention to these women. And he says to them, be careful. Because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam has a responsibility to carry this message. So he needs stability in his house. He doesn't have time for this kind of drama. He doesn't have time for this instability or these family politics. It isn't enough time to deal with this. That's teaching you and I something very crucial and important. When we get married and

00:09:41--> 00:09:59

we have families. The ultimate goal of why we get married isn't to just have children isn't to just fulfill our desires and our need for some companionship. The greater wisdom or reason why we get married is we want to serve humanity to some degree. We will

00:10:00--> 00:10:42

Want to raise children so that those children will be a better meant to the community and to the society around us. We want to get married to somebody, not because we just want somebody to cook and clean for us or to pay off our tuition fees, and to give us good my house, that's not the reason why we get married. But we want a supporting cast so we can fulfill the greater needs, especially towards the oma of Mohammed sallallahu alayhi wasallam. This is really important because when there is instability in a house, it confuses someone. And as a matter of fact, even all of their Islamic goals that they have in their life could be completely gone.

00:10:43--> 00:11:18

He can go to the masjid when he wants to go, Why? Because there's instability in his house just problems all the time. She can focus on the things that she wants to do or the things that she wants to learn why because every single mistake she makes, it becomes pounced on it becomes a huge problem in the marriage. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam his wives are told by Allah in, in what I call very harsh language in the Quran. Allah azza wa jal says, if you don't straighten up your act, all of you wives,

00:11:19--> 00:12:12

then Allah azza wa jal could exchange you or replace you. With wives that are Muslim, he met in court, he taught him he had in tat EBIT and, and Allah starts listing all of these qualities that make a good woman in a marriage, that makes a good wife, a woman that can keep that some stability in this house. A second lesson is here. stability in a home lies within the wife, the mother, she's the one that can do that. You and I as husbands and fathers, we play a role in it. But most of our responsibility lies outside the house. We keep our home safe, we provide we pay the bills, we go out there to make sure that the stability outside the home is always there. So she can take care of the

00:12:12--> 00:12:24

affairs within the home raising the children being kind keeping those doing whatever she needs to do just to keep some sort of moderation in the house. That's why a lot called you and I qalamoun

00:12:25--> 00:12:26

co was polar moon

00:12:27--> 00:12:45

a term that is usually thrown around many people don't understand what polar Moon is the primary responsibility when a law calls you men power moon, meaning you have the capacity, the strength the ability to provide a specially for your family.

00:12:46--> 00:13:39

Then Allah azza wa jal gives us a general advice for the rest of the Ummah and the rest of mankind. Yeah, you have Latina M and a verse number six and sort of the heading who and fusa como Li coonara. Allah takes over the conversation now. Before it was between the Prophet Solomon his wives, now a lot takes over the conversation and says, Look to all of you now. Oh, you who believe people have Amen. protect yourselves and your families from the fire, pause. Normally, when you protect yourself from something, you fear that you are in danger in falling into that thing. So a father protects his son from crossing the street because why? The possibility that a car may come and strike him.

00:13:40--> 00:14:11

There's always that fear that something could happen to you. So that's why you protect yourself otherwise, there's really no need to be cautious. There. There really is no need for you to protect yourself. But here in this area, Allah is talking to the people of Amen. And he's saying to the people if Amen. protect yourselves and your family from the fire. Don't you already have amen? Aren't you already praying you're already performing had you're already doing all the things that Islam requires from you?

00:14:12--> 00:14:15

Isn't that by default supposed to protect you from the fire?

00:14:16--> 00:14:35

Allah azza wa jal is teaching us something crucial. Just because you have Amen. Just because you pray and you perform all the duties Allah expects of you. It doesn't guarantee you protection from Allah's punishment will lahoma Stein.

00:14:37--> 00:15:00

Allah azza wa jal is saying to you Don't you ever stop? Don't you ever stop working? praying, do I solid hedge you made on what I once go and make ombre again, you made Hajj one time and you have the opportunity to do it again. Take advantage of that opportunity and go again. There are some of the setup and tabulation.

00:15:00--> 00:15:03

That made Hajj 60 and 70 times in their lives.

00:15:04--> 00:15:19

They never stopped hoping that Allah azza wa jal could take one or motive delicata Brody Allahu anhu said, We the companions, we would pray that Allah azza wa jal would accept just one solid from us, just one,

00:15:20--> 00:16:05

we would hope and pray, he would take just one from us, we would be happy he could take all of it. But we would be contend that one of it was done right sincerely for him. subhanho wa Taala. You never ever stop, you never, ever give up. Now put the idea in context, that is talking about families. And the a is talking about that harmony in the house. Allah is saying to you and I as fathers, as mothers, as parents, protect your families. But start off by protecting yourself. Because if you can't protect yourself, you cannot protect your family. If you can't protect yourself from doing the wrong things, nobody in your family is going to do that.

00:16:07--> 00:16:12

So the next time a family decides to sit there and watch a Bollywood movie,

00:16:13--> 00:17:01

the father enjoys it, the mother enjoys it. And all the children and everybody as I found these sits there and watch this thing. And then later on in the child's life, they start reminiscing and remembering what they used to see what they used to the images that were portrayed in front of them as a family. Yeah, I watch that movie with my dad. That means it's okay. That means that whatever's in that movie is okay for me to do as well. So I'm gonna go ahead and do it. Then later on the father or the mother is shocked. They're practicing the religion but the child is dating some guy or he's gone in a completely different direction. And they're wondering what just went What just

00:17:01--> 00:17:42

happened? Where did things go wrong? Allah is saying to you, you want to get through your children look in the mirror look at yourself. When was the last time you recited some Koran you're enforcing your children to go to the federal court and to go to the Sunday school? When were you in a class? When did you make will do just for the sake of your love for will do? Bella radi Allahu Allah who got Jenna because he loved will do. That's it. The prophets I send him a saw his footsteps walking in Jenna. And he wanted to know what the secret was. And he says, you know, Sunil I just love being in the state of Haldol. Another companion saw a large piece of wood in the middle of a pathway and

00:17:42--> 00:17:45

he moved it he got genda for that.

00:17:46--> 00:18:16

Just because he moved this and the pathway was made easier for people to accept to access. You have to really really be harsh on yourself. Verse number six in soda to him is one of the most difficult verses to swallow especially when you're a parent. So one of the most difficult verses for you to swallow because it really puts things into perspective that I can I'm My child is only a good child depending on how good of a father I am or how good of a parent and a mother I am.

00:18:17--> 00:18:19

Allah zoa joven says

00:18:21--> 00:18:43

yeah, you hola Xena, Amman qu and fu Sakuma, alikoum, narrow AI La, la, la La, she died. Allah azza wa jal continues and he says, well, could you hand us well hijo de la hemella eager to nucleotides when she dead sooner la Hama a model home with a foreigner man yo marone

00:18:44--> 00:19:03

Now I want you to pay attention to the image Allah is putting in front of you. Allah said protect yourself and your families from the fire. That's one. Then Allah azza wa jal says that the fuel of that fire is stones and people, stones and people.

00:19:05--> 00:19:47

Allah azza wa jal then mentions a third thing, then in addition to that, there are going to be the security guards that are going to be in the fire. And their job is to issue every single command Allah gives them, they don't have no sensitivity to anything. They're just going to do as they're told. It's very different. Like if somebody tells you to do something that's wrong or that's bad. And you think twice and you say to yourself, because you have a conscience, you have something in your heart that prevents you or, or allows you to question that. No, I don't want to do that. I don't want to hit him. He's a good guy at the end. I don't want to insult him. These angels that are

00:19:48--> 00:20:00

in this jahannam working on behalf of Allah, they have no sensitivity whatsoever. So the image is not just this individual is protecting themselves from

00:20:00--> 00:20:04

The fire but Allah azzawajal is saying to if you don't, it's gonna get worse.

00:20:05--> 00:20:24

Whenever Allah mentions that humans are fuel of the fire, now think about a fire itself. Without that fuel, what happens to the fire? It extinguishes. So what does that tell you about this fuel that fuel can possibly remain there forever?

00:20:25--> 00:20:43

The individual these people that a lot categorizes and says they're the fuel of the fire. In other words, some scholars have tafsir interpreted that, that these people will never leave the fire unless Allah's mercy is bestowed on them. Otherwise they dwell in it forever. Well,

00:20:44--> 00:20:46

how did all of this start?

00:20:47--> 00:20:54

Because that person didn't protect themselves and their family. That's all the subject of this a is

00:20:55--> 00:21:47

looking at your children cuz your wife and I point out us, the husbands and fathers us especially. Because our primary responsibility is to preserve Islam in our home even for our wives. You see your wife slipping you the husband Allah called yukawa Moon in another I Alice's literary jelly Allah Hina donnager men you have this capacity just slightly Ulises Dada Jo one level, it's singular, not Dada jAgt you have one Roger Swan capacity above them, that you can keep stability and stabilize events stabilize a slim in the house. So you see your wife slipping. you kindly and gently correct her. You see your children slipping and she can't do it. You go ahead and you do it. Why? Because

00:21:47--> 00:22:16

your job is to preserve Islam in that house. Allah made you a woman. Now there is hope brothers, there is hope. Because understand one thing Allah azza wa jal put you in that position because genuinely Allah can see in you that you have the capacity you have what it takes to do this job. Then Allah azza wa jal says, Yeah, you're Latina, kofoed hula tartar, the Euro Leo in NEMA to juice onomah Quantum Dharma Loon.

00:22:17--> 00:22:37

What just happened? The previous Aya Allah says, Yeah, yo la Vina me know. The next as Allah says, Yeah, you have Lavina cafaro or you who this believe we're talking to the same audience to the same do people have amen? Why is Allah addressing these people have he man caffeine.

00:22:39--> 00:23:24

This is the result or the punishment for somebody who doesn't uphold the responsibility of taking care of themselves and their family. person who's careless with that. Allah will address them as a caffeine on the Day of Judgment. This is one of the worst labels you can ever have, especially in front of all of mankind. Then Allah says lead to the rollio don't make any excuses today. You are going to be compensated based on the efforts that you had put forth. That's it. And then Allah azza wa jal concludes this discussion with the next verse in which I will conclude with in the second part of the hokhmah, my brothers and sisters, we ask Allah azza wa jal to put stability and harmony

00:23:24--> 00:24:09

in our homes and keep it there. We ask Allah as an adult to show on his bottlecap in our homes, with our children, with our husbands and our wives. Well, lucky brothers and sisters, the reason why I chose this topic is we're living in a time where we're so consumed in building lavish buildings and institution. we're forgetting to build proper families and invest in these families to build proper institutions in the home. A community is only as strong as the families that build that community. So we asked a lot as the vigil to give us the in the knowledge, the understanding the sincerity, that we can help these families and bring that stability that is so badly needed, so that if we can

00:24:09--> 00:24:25

strengthen the family, we will strengthen our communities, we strengthen our communities, we will strengthen the aroma of Mohammed sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, I'll call him at a smart one was stuff that Allahu Allah Kumari certainly I'm assuming them in Kali them. First off it all in who who Allah for or Rahim

00:24:33--> 00:24:53

Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah while he was happy he woman was buried. Again Allah subhanho wa Taala continues Yeah, you have the M and O you who believe to boo Illa he tow button naso Ha. Allah azza wa jal says, Oh you who believe

00:24:54--> 00:24:59

make Toba to Allah but not just any tober you see

00:25:00--> 00:25:50

comes from the word tab a YouTuber which means to change your situation to physically change your circumstance. Toba doesn't just mean say a stop federal law. Toba means to literally make a physical change. So if the computer is the biggest fitness in your life, Toba is the turn off that computer, unplug it and put it away for a while. Keep it as far away as possible. If going to a certain place is affecting your Amen. Toba is not just saying a stuff it'll line you can still walk in that place on a law will protect you. Don't go there again. Or don't go there for a while until you strengthen your Amen. But Allah azza wa jal added something to this Toba and he called it na so her. Na suha is

00:25:50--> 00:26:21

not just any tober anymore. Not so hard is a life changing towba one thing you do changes your whole life. Some people they get this. Some people I talked to a brother A long time ago who was smoking for 20 years, 20 years. And he said some days he would two packs and three packs of cigarettes a day. So I asked him, How did you quit and he quit Alhamdulillah and ask them how did you do it? How did you quit? He said one day

00:26:23--> 00:27:08

he took his pack of cigarettes and threw it in the garbage and he never smoked a cigarette again. Just like that. That's called tow button. No Soha it's that one thing that you do and it changes your life forever. So Allah is saying to you and I, if you have instability in your house, you need to do at least one thing that can change all of that for you. If the DVDs and the movies are a problem for you need to just shut off the TV put away those DVDs for some time, educate your family and your children. Let them understand the evils behind these things. And then perhaps you can reintroduce it to them later on when they're more mature to understand the ramifications of this.

00:27:09--> 00:27:54

Allah says make Toba Tyrannosaur her brothers and sisters I conclude and ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to bless us with Toba to know Soha the life changing Toba that all of us including myself, we all desperately mean, we ask Allah azza wa jal to give us the strength that we make Toba every single day, all the time, wherever we are, we pray and we ask a layout of B Forgive us, yo B shower your mercy and your love and security and protection to us, in our homes with our families and our children yada be we ask you to protect them, especially our young children. Yeah, it'll be we asked you to protect them from the fitna of this world, the fitna of their society and all the pressures

00:27:54--> 00:28:39

that they deal with. Yeah, Allah we ask you to protect them and make them make this easy for them alone. I mean, brothers and sisters, these are the words that I conclude with, and we send peace and blessings to our Rasul salotto. Robbie was salam o la cama Marana subhanho wa Taala Phaeton. xili in Allahu Allah ecotel who you saw lunarlon Nabil Yeah, you have Latina M and o solo Allah He was suddenly mo Taslima Allahumma salli. ala Mohammed while early Mohammed came so late Allah Ibrahim Allah early Ibrahima innaka. homido Majeed along muffle Massimino well Muslim at all, maybe in a minute here even Humala Ahmed in Nakuru, even semi or Mooji Buddha word alone in Nanana local Jenna

00:28:39--> 00:28:59

Mercado de la Hermann Colin our ama on our auto becoming a narwhal Mercado de la Herman Colin our amen along my baddeck fee boo Tina along my baddeck fee as well Gina whether we Tina, yo Bella Allah subhana wa barakato Bella is a tea I'm now your seafood our salmon island was Selena well hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Taala