DONATION APPEAL!

ALL our Projects are FREE and with no advertisements.

We serve millions of downloads a month... Now! Imagine earning on-going rewards of every lecture and quran audio and so on.

As well as helping us cover our running costs and future projects!

mufti menk image

"I really think this is one of the greatest causes one could support"

    Become a Patron
    Donate via PayPal

More Information and Options

How the Quran teaches us what to do #11 Control What You See Will Ultimately Control What You Do

share this pageShare Page
Musleh Khan

Channel: Musleh Khan

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:41

Salam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah were buried. So let's get right into this Today's episode is about, if you can control what you see what you look at, then you will control your actions what you do. And for this, we're going to go straight to one of the most beautiful soldiers of the hora and suited to Nord verse 30, and 31. Now, immediately off the bat, these two verses ii mams, and have teams and lectures love to use these verses, when we're talking about controlling our eyes controlling it, what we stare and what we look at. And obviously, that conversation is going to lead towards looking at the things that are not

00:00:41--> 00:01:25

permissible that are hot on how you can control that. But the reason why I've chosen this topic is for a number of different issues. The first is how the subject is talked about, usually a speaker would stand up and tell the audience and believing men lower the gaze and guard the privates. And then the same message is given to the women. And that's really it. But to explain just a bit more of the breakdown of both of these verses, why the choice of wording, Allah subhana wa Taala use some of the names that he called out and used in this verse really adds more richness and purity, and reflection, when we're talking about this subject. It's a beautiful subject to be quite honest with

00:01:25--> 00:02:04

you, in the core, as you're going to see in sha Allah with Tyler with these two verses. Now to understand these two verses. The second point is that you'll have to go back a couple of verses, a couple of verses in the same surah Allah subhana wa Taala said, Yeah, you will let me know or people have even let that hold you Bhutan alighiero booty come Don't enter a home that isn't your home, had that step needs to what to sell the maurella earlier, is still unanswered is not just to get permission permission to enter somebody else's house. But you know, it's the right time, you don't just pull up into somebody's driveway, and you just call them or text them, Hey, I'll send you the

00:02:04--> 00:02:41

driveway open up, you know, the right time, you know that they've been gone to work all day, you don't show up at the house at the end of their day, because they could be exhausted, you know, they've gone to school, you know, there's a big test they might be studying. So you know, the right timing to find to come to somebody's house. And part of that is you have you should be invited. If you're not invited, then you shouldn't go. But if you do decide to still go, then you use your common sense, then a lot also says what to send the more either here, then of course, you say I said Mr. Lee come to the residence of that home. Now scholars differ. Because obviously, this is not

00:02:41--> 00:03:15

going to apply that if you're visiting a friend's house or non Muslim home, you're not going to walk in there to set them or they come to everybody, because nobody's going to know how to respond to that. So scholars had different and said, in this area, it's not referring to just people, obviously, it's referring to believers and Muslims, if you enter their homes, you say I said I'm already home, but anybody else's home, you still say sell them or they come to the angels that could potentially be in that home for whatever reason. So scholars, they explain this differently. That's not our subject right now. The point is, is that there are two etiquettes when you enter somebody's

00:03:15--> 00:03:54

home, that you know it's the right time to be there. So you use your common sense, and that you say a set Mr. equal, or at least well wishes when you're entering entering somebody's home. Good morning, hello, how's everybody doing? And then you enter the house, then Alyssa panatela takes this conversation as he continues to talk about different scenarios. That's when we come to verse 30, verse 30, Allah subhanho wa Taala says, putting the meaning say to believing men, your whole domain of a solid him why follow follow john protect their eyes, as well as the privates, then he can ask at a level that is pure for them in the lovehabibi manual snon Allah is fully well aware of what you

00:03:54--> 00:04:38

manufacture. Now this first point, Allah subhanho wa Taala is talking to the men, which means that this subject of controlling the eyes is a priority for men more so than it is for women. And that's not something to be ashamed of. It's in our innate nature, that the way that Allah subhanaw taala created us as as men. I mean, there are even reports articles that you can read online, you can google them about the whole psychological breakdown of how a man's brain is and how much if he stares at something, and it stimulates something in him, he wants to stare a little bit more and then that cycle continues. So this is not something that we're just pulling out of left field, there

00:04:38--> 00:05:00

are actually studies that have been done, where experts talk about the psychological breakdown of how men control their eyes when they're looking at and in this case here, we're gonna just keep it in context that you're looking at something out or whatever it may be, that may be. With that being said so the conversation and the priority is shifted towards men. Generally speaking,

00:05:00--> 00:05:38

Speaking, we have to prioritize this issue. Now what's going to happen? How does a law address it? Because obviously, when you want to tell somebody about them looking at how long, that's a sensitive thing to do, you can't just waltz up to somebody and say to them, hey, look, man, I saw you staring at that girl, and I need you to save stuff at all right now. You know, it could be offensive, you could rub them the wrong way. And I'd be like, No, I wasn't, I wasn't looking at anybody. So Allah says, Hola, say who's talking to the Prophet? alayhi salaatu? Wa Salaam? Why not just say yeah, you have Latina? No hope do have a solder calm or people love you, man. Control your eyes. Why did not

00:05:38--> 00:06:21

let talk to us directly, he allowed the messenger. So the love It was so to deliver this conversation, this message to the rest of the companions, why it's a sensitive issue. So when you're addressing sensitive issues, you want to be able to do it in a way that you can nurture the conversation that you can make it somewhat personal. So the Prophet Alayhi salat wa salam is the Messenger of Allah, it's his it's part of his job and his duties that when he's delivering this message, that he does so with the wisdom, so Allah, the source of his wisdom, reveals to him, I want you because you are the chosen one, you're the best to do this, on the ground. Take this knowledge

00:06:21--> 00:07:08

that I'm revealing to you, and share it in a way that comes off that it's sensitive, it's considering it's not offensive. So that's the first wisdom why Allah says poor say to them this little meaning doesn't say little muslimeen, Allah says most men, why the subject in this area is going to be an issue, not a desire issue. And that's, that's part of the problem when we address these kinds of topics is that we immediately associate and restrict that conversation to just desire, desire, desire, that's part of the picture. But the bigger picture, which is the priority here, which is the real issue that's important to a lot. You see, we all have desires, nobody is

00:07:08--> 00:07:50

going to remove that you're not just going to wake up one day and you have no desires whatsoever. It's It's It's part of who we are. It's the way that Allah created us. But Allah is telling us part of nurturing and controlling those desires is limit meaning you have to be more alert did not say Holy levena ama know, those who acknowledge belief or Amen, there's a difference. If Allah says poor little Athena M and who say to those who acknowledge Amen, that means that they recognize what they're doing is wrong, but it doesn't necessarily mean they're going to stop doing it. You know, I know I'm not supposed to be staring at that, but I can't help myself. That's another thing. I know

00:07:50--> 00:08:29

it's wrong for me to click on that website. But I just keep doing that's an Athena Avenue you have a problem. But it doesn't necessarily mean that since you know the consequence, you know the answer that you're actually going to follow through but most men they follow through. This is a quality in a believer when they are Muslim that they have a man and nobody's going to take that away. There he men talks to them when their eyes start going all over the place their amen kicks in and says Well, that's not right. Don't do that. Don't make the second look or the third look, change the website, get off the computer, turn it off, go pre total card scholas go talk to somebody about this you have

00:08:29--> 00:09:14

a sickness, you have an issue, go do something it's creating problems. You're ruining your marriage, you're ruining your relationship. Stop that's a man talking to you. Now with that being said, first thing Allah says yo boom in other solidi He must have been literally means to weekend have been also means to turn a different direction. So what is a lesson a lot does not say just close your eyes. A lot doesn't say just bow your head down. A lot doesn't say stare at a wall less says shift your eyes to something else meaning just literally glance elsewhere. So what is the law telling us to do your Eman kicks in and it literally put pushes the brakes on what you're looking at your whole do mean

00:09:14--> 00:09:59

absolve him of a Sati him not min early only him. I known his eyes of Asana is a complete view of something. Basia alized and Basia right, he has complete view of something. So what is a lot of really saying let's put it together. A lot is sent is saying that when you're talking to somebody and for whatever reason your eyes get fixated on something that should be hot on that you shouldn't be doing what Allah is saying. You don't necessarily have to turn the other way or look down to the full unless you really need to do that. Unless you know it's just too much. Well, what Allah is saying is we can your eyes In other words,

00:10:00--> 00:10:36

Stop staring. So yes, like when you're in a classroom and the opposite gender is your teacher, right? And that man or woman, but the point is, this a is telling men lower your gaze when you're sitting when there's women around literally right? Like, don't stare. But what if it's your teacher would have a colleague, what if it's your boss? What if it's somebody on the bus or wherever, right? In this case here, Allah is not saying, don't look, Allah is saying, when you're looking, don't look with desire. Don't look with fitna that's what the whole domain of Sati him, we can just stare and just literally stop staring. Just have a casual conversation. The Prophet alayhi salatu wa sallam

00:10:37--> 00:11:19

would look at a woman when a woman was speaking to him. He was a man some love while he was dealing with the best etiquettes when it came to engaging and talking with people, men or women. So it's it's not fundamentally correct to say, the prophet Elisa to slam did not speak to a woman or did not look at them when he was speaking to them. Now, lots of other conversations coming up like the wives of the Prophet has said, and what about the A in Santa Rosa, we'll come to that later. It's focused on one thing at a time here, you'll domina saw him why follow foliage and protect the privates. Now that looks like a huge jump you got from the eyes, then all of a sudden you go and protect the

00:11:19--> 00:11:56

privates. I mean, there's a lot of things that happen in between that, that protect the privates, obviously is referring to to Xena or to adultery, or to fornication, right to protect yourself from that. But this whole conversation started with just looking at somebody like seriously from there to there. That's not what people think about every single time they see something that is wrong. They're just like, Oh, my God, you know, I just protect the product. But that's not how it works. But so what's happened, there are lots of details in between that lead from staring at somebody then eventually getting to this point. But a lead doesn't mention those details. You know, why?

00:11:57--> 00:12:40

Because they're not important. This is where the poor end does not give us information that we don't need. You know, it does not give us details that are not important. Like it's Don't waste your time with it. Why would Allah subhana wa tada do that this is, this is within his wisdom. And knowledge does not give us these details, because we don't need to know what they are. So let's leave it at that. But lots of things happen. So a lie is only concerned about the beginning. And the destination, the end the the potential place that you could end up if you don't control the starting point. And this is why this video is titled control what you see will ultimately control what you

00:12:40--> 00:13:21

do. So then a lot. So just specifically for the men, here's the incentive, then to cascade a level that's pure for them. In what sense does this get is literally spiritual purification. In other words, how you put this into practice how you start to see the fruits of this manifest. When you control what you look at and what you stare at, you start to concentrate better, you start memorizing things better. You can focus on your homework, on your studies on your memorization, everything, you just start remembering things every single day, you're like, I can't believe I just remember that. Well, it's because you control this. So it's more than just a psychological or a

00:13:21--> 00:14:03

desire related issue. Like this is your next now Allah is saying you control what you gaze and look at, then as a result, you're going to purify yourself. So you're going to be able to do anything and everything that you want a whole lot better. In a lot of hobbies, don't be my your scenario, a lot is fully well aware of what you manufacture. What is it that you're building? What is it that you're manufacturing? The answer? Sometimes you'll find yourself and just be honest with yourself. I mean, that's the first way to heal an issue is to be honest with yourself that you actually have a problem. So sometimes you might find yourself that you're not really looking but you're stealing a

00:14:03--> 00:14:39

gaze here and there. You're just like, you know, you're drawing you're staring. So I'm going to stare at you guys, but look at my eyes, right? So you're just staring you're saying and your eyes kind of do that and you just kind of continue and then your eyes go away the other way. And you just kind of look at third time and a fourth time. You see all those moments that's called your scenario when a lead knows what you're doing. One stare leads to the other. So you're putting one brick on top of another on top of another on top of another so it's one stair after another after another What does that ultimately lead to? Then we go back to the beginning of the horse again. So what

00:14:39--> 00:14:59

Allah is saying I'm fully well aware of what each stair what each brick is doing. And this is where it's captured in several places in the poor poor earn a local yarn and we'll mail you civil rune why may you already know Allah knows what you are keeping in secret but what's obvious Yamaha in our young woman talk to us

00:15:00--> 00:15:43

Abdul Allah knows when your eyes are stealing a glance on what you're, what you're concealing and hiding in your chest. So those those fantasies or those imaginations that you have, that you know, as a result of staring at somebody, then you start to visualize certain things that you would do or say to that person without them having a clue. Those moments, Allah is paying attention to all of it. So Pamela, and then the same message in verse 31. To the women. Well, what it means to do that, I mean, I'm sorry, in my father for the Joneses. Same exact message, but then their incentive is different. A lot. So Jill says that after we're done the photo one, will you be Dina Xena, tahune

00:15:43--> 00:16:31

illa, Novato, minha. All right, and ally. So Angela says that you try your very best while you don't flaunt and show off your beauty except that which is obvious. So obviously, what this means is that you're in hijab to an extent, right? But Allah is saying that don't show off your beauty. Don't flaunt it, don't advertise it. Why accept that which is obvious? What's the exception here, here, there are about six to nine opinions of the exception. And I showed you a low amount of chef here, either here or the loved one, like so many different scholars and sahabas. They had different opinions of the exception with genuinely speaking, when you look at all of these opinions in them,

00:16:31--> 00:17:13

Elvira minette it's the beauty in the woman that she can control like, it's just her natural beauty. And this is really interesting, because if you don't delve into this even further, you'll find like a woman would wear niqab. So all that's exposed is just her eyes, and a guy could still look at her and be like Allahu Akbar. No, Mashallah. She's beautiful. And you're thinking to yourself, What are you looking at? What would you see like Mashallah, her eyelash, like, what are you doing, but that's the way that Allah created. And that's the way that Allah created women, that he gave them a natural level of beauty, that she can't do anything about, no matter what she wears, or doesn't wear, no

00:17:13--> 00:17:29

matter how she covers, or she doesn't cover, there's going to be this beauty of Albert. That's what Allah blessed her with. And that's why Allah says in them over huddling, except that beauty that's obvious, like you can't do anything about it. You know, there's a beautiful hidden gem behind the statement. And that is,

00:17:30--> 00:18:13

and I'm speaking directly for a lot of the young sisters and girls in general, that might look for validation through what their friends say, and the compliments that they get from their friends. And unfortunately, especially for somebody that struggles with self esteem and confidence, they might struggle with the idea that if one person calls them fat, or others an insult, calls them a name of some sort, and really destroys their confidence immediately. And so as a result, if they don't know how to nurture that they don't know how to sit and treat those issues, then what ends up happening is that they feed off of the energy that people give them. And that's really a tragedy, because

00:18:13--> 00:18:50

unfortunately, there are lots of people out there that just let off negative energy. They say awful things without considering somebodies feelings, they'll call you every name in the book, they'll insult you, they'll make fun of the way you look things that you can't really do anything about, or it's a personal struggle for you. And unfortunately, some of these young sisters then will have to sit with somebody, a psychologist, a chef or something on unload all of these issues. And if those people that are listening to that are not qualified to handle these kinds of issues, then you know, what they end up saying to these poor sisters, these poor girls that just don't know how to deal

00:18:50--> 00:19:40

with that kind of emotion, they'll say to them things like, Oh, you know, that's from shaitan, just pray photocards escalada help you, you know, or you know what, just ignore them, you are beautiful. So they'll just blank out, erase the problem, and slap on your beautiful and here you go. Just like a level claim. It's not the proper way to deal with this. What Allah subhanho wa Taala is telling us here is that there is something about a woman that is beautiful to Allah. And so you should consider and think of yourself as beautiful because Allah thinks of you as beautiful. That's the beauty about this idea. That alone made an exception. And that exception, a law recognized that that is in them

00:19:40--> 00:20:00

Alva domina that's a beauty in her that I Allah sees that she can't do anything about. So it's almost as if Allah is saying, You're beautiful. You don't need somebody else to keep telling you that. I mean, it's nice when people reinforce and encourage and compliment that's all fine. But it's those limits.

00:20:00--> 00:20:36

When those things don't happen, at least you're able to say to yourself, my Creator thinks I'm beautiful. He designed me this way. He chose for me to have a certain you know complexion that when I look in the mirror, my eyebrows look a certain way My nose is a certain way my skin is a certain way. I still say that because he is more solid. He's the one fashion meet this way. And then Allah subhanho wa Taala tells us when the elderly but they'll be home will be in the island, God will be him. Then take the team out of the headscarf and back in the days the headscarf used to fall at the back. So Allah says, allow the extra material now to fall in the front for obvious reasons, right?

00:20:36--> 00:21:19

Well, y'all don't even have been formally allowed to you will be him. Well, now you were Dean, as in two 111 LIBOR, ooh, let him in. But you bought hula to him, Allah. Then Allah subhana wa Taala says, and this is what we conclude with, that when it comes to her beauty, her beauty is allowed to be open. And it's allowed to be exposed to certain categories of people that are mentioned in verse 31 of swords, nor in verse 31, has the categories of people that she is allowed to remove her hijab in front of. So basically, she can just be herself. So obviously in front of her husband, in front of her father in front of her children, so on and so were her sisters and all of these groups of

00:21:19--> 00:22:08

people, right. So that's not our subject. That's a different subject. But the point is, the exceptions are made. So in a nutshell, what is this all about? The end of the day, the eyes, and what you see is the starting point of literally all of the personal struggles with respect to focus, concentration, consistency, in terms of our religion, all of this lies, and it starts here, control of what you see, you will control what you do, and you'll find yourself you'll concentrate better. And then obviously, you know, from at least a you know, in terms of these industries that feed off of careless eyes and lure you in, you know, you'll just watch a commercial, and the commercial,

00:22:08--> 00:22:46

we'll be talking about like toys or something. And you still have to change the channel because there's an inappropriate scene, or just a scene that triggers something in you, or you don't want your kids to see it. And you're like it's a kids program. And so there's industries that revolve around keeping your eyes busy for all the wrong reasons. But once you have Amen, that's where the protection is. And if you're listening to this, and you find that this is helpful, it's a sign that this area is talking to you not me, I'm just making nuchal You know, I'm just transferring what I see in the horror and how scholars explain it. And I give it to you. So if you find that this was

00:22:46--> 00:23:24

helpful, and you're like, you know, that makes sense, my email, I'm a person of Amen, I need to be confident in me that I have what it takes to always control what I look and always realize my brothers and sisters alone will never put us in a situation that we cannot bear. If Allah wanted, he could have put us during a time or a generation when they heard about or people used to stare at her um, there will be like, how could somebody do that? Like it would have been the perfect generation. When they heard the word Zinner? They'll be like, what is that? Why would anybody do something like that? A lot could have put us during that generation, but he put us now in 2020, what we are

00:23:24--> 00:24:08

surrounded with everywhere we go, and still tells us control your eyes, control your eyes, protect your beauty, be confident, I Allah, I find something beautiful in you. So that should be enough for you. And that should start to at least work on and stimulate and strengthen self confidence in all of us. We all have what it takes to do this. The last point is if you're wondering, Is this a trivial subject? You know, sometimes when we are engrossed with COVID-19, with protests and campaigns of all of these issues around the world, it's very easy to lose sight of the little things, little things that have an enormous and major impact in our relationship with our Creator.

00:24:09--> 00:24:48

It's very easy to lose sight of that. So think of these reminders as moments where you can just first split second just for a moment, you break out of all of the global issues that are happening you break out and you just look in the mirror for a few minutes. What's this video I don't know 2025 minutes or something. So for 20 minutes or so on, you're just looking in the mirror and you want to just see and catch up with what you missed out on. And today it's just the ice and and and it kind of make it sound like it's trivial in the sense that you can get through this we all can get through this sahabas had issues controlling what they stare stare at and what they look at, but yet they

00:24:48--> 00:24:59

were able to overcome that they were able to repent and there he man did all of the talking for them all the control was there. So as long as we have an attitude

00:25:00--> 00:25:48

Wait have he meant for me Yarmouth colada veltra Tim, hi yada yada. If you have an atom's weight of men in you, you will see that atoms weight of the men will manifest you will see the fruits of that. So I pray that Allah subhanaw taala blesses all of us with not just an atom's weight of a man. But even more than that, that our lives, our choices, and our behavior. Our attitudes all reflect the purity in our faith and in our, in our men in our hearts and in our lives. I know that we all have what it takes to do this. I know that we can do this despite that we are surrounded with images with subliminal messages with videos with options all the time each day, every day all day. Once you are

00:25:48--> 00:26:12

a Latina, Eminem, it's a starting point. When you are pulling meaning or pulling a minute, you're there it's a quality in you that you have faith. And so with Emacs, you can overcome any spiritual struggle out there. May Allah subhanaw taala give us all the strength to do that a loving me, just like my level hold on until we meet again. Salaam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh