Muhammad West – Happiness Guide #6

Muhammad West
AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the benefits of having healthy relationships and good friendships for overall well-being, including longevity and health. They emphasize the importance of finding a balance between one's emotional well-being and finding a healthy balance between family and friendships. The speakers also provide tips on building one's life, including finding good relationships, finding one's own happiness, and avoiding harms. They encourage people to take action and open their budgets soon, warning against harms and promise to open their budgets soon.
AI: Transcript ©
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I will be lying Michigan rajim Bismillah Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam ala

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Sayidina Muhammad Ali he also pH Maria My beloved brothers said Mr. Lee can work with law he will buy cattle hamdulillah Ramadan I mean always and forever will begin with the praise and thanks for the last panel Darla and I should have Allah ilaha illa Allah will be a witness and testify that there is none worthy of worship besides Allah subhanaw taala and we see no love and greetings and salutations. So beloved Nabi Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam is pious and your family to his companions, and all those who follow us from now until the end of time. May Allah subhanaw taala bless us to be amongst them. I mean, while hamdulillah Al Hamdulillah. We start off with a bit of an announcement

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and a very sad announcement that unfortunately, as of today, they live in fourth December 2020 magic Burano Islam is closed all activities at the moment from the material being suspended including Juma and the walks and clauses. And while there was not been any cases of COVID recorded at the masjid, there's no ski at the masjid. We have noticed that the the trend that we are in a second wave and the bootcamp in particular, these are small and densely packed area and the few cases within the book up, we have decided to take the cautious method of assessing the situation and increasing our protective measures to make sure our muscles are safe when they come to the masjid and so for now,

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and we will assess this on a day to day basis. For now we will be keeping the masjid closed and will allow us an opportunity to ensure that the masjid is properly sanitized, and that we have enough measures so that when we do open, that everyone is safe insha Allah and you know this is not an easy thing to do to close the budget, especially for Juma but we have to remind ourselves also that Allah subhanho wa Taala did not make it very difficult upon us. And we know that if you are simply traveling even for holiday that Juma is not compulsory on you. Allah says that when you travel through the land, there is no blame upon you for shortening your Salah from forecasts to Torah cause

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and especially Allah says if you feel any harm from the from being attacked by an enemy, and here we fearing a home from a virus, there is no blame on us for taking the precautions that Allah subhanaw taala as a food less so for those of us at home the life you attended the masjid, if you feel safe and secure with another location, you may you may feel performance unworthy, if you feel better to stay at home and perform lower in sha Allah. All of these are matters of Etihad. And it goes back to our intention and I'll make it easy for us and allow us to once again have the merchants open very soon when we make the offer all those who are sick, those who are ill, some very close family

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members of mine, as well are in isolation. And we may do our last pantalla grandslam constable Shiva Meanwhile, from the gala, inshallah we continue with our series on happiness, and it might you know, it might be one of those questions we talking about happiness in the midst of COVID. And, and supine Allah in all difficult situations, we try to take the best out of it and try to make the best out of life. And as we said so many times, then I be so solemn. It's such a difficult life in many respects, but it's always a positive and happy person. And today, inshallah I want to talk about perhaps the number one secret to a happy and healthy life, not just a happy life, but a healthy

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life. And this is scientifically proven, what is the number one thing that you need to have in your life, to be happy, have a scientific perspective, of course, we know even beyond that the real secret to happiness is a relationship with Allah subhanaw taala. But we'll talk about today on something of a different now, over the last couple of weeks, we're speaking about happiness. And we mentioned that of the things that make you happy, all the external factors, wealth, your body, the things that your body needs. And last week, we spoke about the things that are important for your body, and what things you can do and tips to make sure that you are happy from a physical

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standpoint. Today we'll talk about your emotional standpoint and your, your your emotional well being. And this really is where we as a as a species, with the the secret our happiness is our emotional well being. And so Subhanallah something that was done a study was called the longest study in human development. So the very famous Harvard University 80 years ago, they took a sample of 700 plus men, and I think we've mentioned this before, and they track the life. So for the past 80 years, they've been checking in on them doing surveys. So from when they were youngsters, teenagers, basically, until some of them in the 90s. Looking at their lives, how some of their

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progressed, obviously out of that sample, some of them died quite young, some loved are still living in going on towards 100. Some became rich from rags to riches, others were very rich, and it became very poor. One of them even became a president, a US president. And so they wanted to assist what makes a successful life what makes a happy life, the only common denominators that we can look at and implement in our own life. And the study really, you know, very clearly what it shows that the people that were happiest the people that had the most

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fulfilling lives. We're not the richest people, we're not the people that had the best careers. We're not the people that you know, climb the economic ladder, it were the happiest people. And the most successful people were those who had happy relationships, they had good relationships with the family and the friends. And then really, simply put, the secret to a happy life is to have good relationships with your family and your friends. And this is going to be the thing that will ultimately make your life worth living. What they also learned, and what they didn't expect to learn was the impact of a happy relationship on your health, how having good relationships impacts your

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health, they found that those people that loved into the 80s and the 90s, what they had in common, wasn't that they were physically, you know, superior, it was because they had happy loving relationships. And so really love, as cliche as it is, is the thing that will make you happy, and will give you a healthy life, to feel loved. And to share love. It showed that the brains were healthier, they kept the memory longer, that it's in fact, and in the you know, they tracked people and they 50s. And they did a cholesterol test for all of them. So some of them had high cholesterol, low cholesterol, even those who had high cholesterol, but were in happy relationships, and they made

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it to the 80s. So Subhanallah even, you know, happy relationships is a better indicator of your longevity, then your your cholesterol levels. And they also discovered that living an isolated life is actually very detrimental. Someone that is completely on their own, you know, feeling isolated, lonely, does not have love, always in a traumatic relationship, maybe in a very unhappy marriage, or in abusive relationship, this isn't actually a killer, it is something that will cut your lifespan very short. And it's as bad or even worse than say I haven't like smoking. And so I don't know, the outcome of this is something which we know 1400 years ago, a hadith which I always find quite

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amazing, because I don't know that a hadith that speaks of a similar kind of reward. And this can only be the ones of a prophet. So remember, what did this Harvard study prove that if you're happy, if you have good relationships, you will be successful in your life, you'll be happy, and it will increase your life. Now we know that Abby's also said that who ever wants his risk and his provisions to be expanded, and he wants his life to be extended to handle all that I'm just telling you, your life span will be extended. If you keep good relations with your family, then the relationships will really give you a healthier and longer life not Panama versus you know, an

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amazing this is 1500 years, the words of a prophet, something which you know, scientists never expected. And this is what the lava lamp is telling us keep good relationships with your family and your friends. And your lifespan will be extended suddenly, to this little resource. Adam says to the world is filled with good things, things that will make you happy fold with delights. But the best delight, the thing that will give you the most happiness, to bring you the most joy is to have a righteous wife, the best that you can have is basically having a good marriage. And this is perhaps the biggest indicator for having a happy life is having a good and happy marriage.

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Now what do we do with this information, you know, it almost feels too easy, that if you want to be happy, then have good relationships. You know, work on your marriage work on your relationship with your parents and your kids and your friends. And this will give you a life worth living. And yet we find that what we do in reality is we are told invest your time, your effort, your energy in chasing of the money in chasing after your career with 100% or 110% give 110% to your company and sometimes even news taking from your family many of us we spend more time with our work family with our work colleagues and our own family. And this pursuit just for material gain at the expense of your

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relationships is actually a recipe for misery. When you get to your 40s and 50s it will take a toll on your mental well being your physical well being you would be unhealthy and you would have ruined your your relationships, you will be a very very miserable person. No matter what number you have in your bank account how many zeros they are in your bank account, it would not be worth it. And so really the secret to the number one secret and the area which each of us need to focus on that will make us happy is to focus on our relationships. And so as we did last week, we're going to give some tips on how to build good and happy relationships. So the first thing is obviously make time for

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your relationships make time for your for your family and your friends. We live in a very high packed you know very, very busy lifestyle. We juggling between work and this and that. So you have to make time for your family. As we seen in the highlights last week. The Prophet Solomon says give each one made you shave and your family as it's hot on you is a beautiful Hadith about one brother traveling goes out of his way to visit his brother and so on the way Allah sees an angel to ask him why are you doing this? Why have you you know inconvenience yourself just to visit your brother is it because he has some fever

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You are asking for some money is the reason why you're going. And so the man says, No, the only reason I'm going is because I love him for the sake of Allah, I want to visit him, I want to spend time with him. And so the angel said to him, then Allah wants me to inform you that Allah loves you as you love him, that by making time for our relatives, is something which is very pleasing to Allah subhanaw taala. And so what this means make time, prioritize your relationships, just like you have a to do list, I have to do this for work, I have to do this for the house. All these things that take priority family, wife, kids, parents should not be whatever time we have left, they get the the

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rest of the you know, the leftovers, the best of our skills to our work, and then the leftovers here to our family. So make an effort to be the first person that calls your relatives send a message, greet, if you can visit as much as you can, these things will make you happy. And of course, as we said, it is very loving to Allah subhanaw taala. Number two, as we know, it's not just about the quantity of time, it is a quality of time now that amico Salam was perhaps the busiest man that you could get doing so many things, but he would make every interaction even if it was a, you know, a one minute conversation. It was so profound, it lifts such an impact on the other person that that

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person felt loved, they felt valued. And then a resource alum would make every moment that he interacted with someone of quality, quality time. And there's so many examples. For example, we have the example of gab rhodiola, where he was missing in the battle and then a resource and was looking for him. And the Prophet said, Why is God not here, I know that he even as he for the first time he has bought a second horse, meaning that abyssal sanlam knows how many horses he Sahaba each one has, you know, just taking into account, you know, your situation in life. Another example, you know, the professor meets up with a side note that means like an atom something very, very small, the smallest

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possible thing is either, so the Prophet meets this man and the Prophet awesome social and what's your name? And so he said, I'm a Buddha like Adam, okay, 15 years later, the prophets Allah meet up with our again, and I will that comes to you and says, Yeah, Rasulullah Do you remember me we met all the time ago, and the Prophet looks at him. So Solomon said, or is your name not Abu naml abou ENT, right? Not atom abou Ent. So a Buddha said no, no, my name is Alvaro not normal. But the prophet and knew he remember there's something about small got to do with this person. And so I'm going to be so solemn will take a personal interest in every conversation, every person. And that's

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what we need to do a limit the screen time when we see you know what is happening, it's easy to to have a very superficial conversation with our relatives. What is important is to have meaningful conversations what's going on in your life, take interest in the interest, it's about what is what do you what are your kids interested in? What are your friends interested in and speak about those things, this bolts quality relationships. Number three, have fun, you know, no one wants to be around a miserable person, and have a sense of humor that is awesome, as we know, had a sense of humor, and he was playful. And with all the difficult things that he had in his life and all the

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concerns he had, he made time to race with Ayesha, he had a food fight with soda jabiru Leon says, We also harbor when we were gonna be so solemn, we will recite poetry in his presence. And we will talk about the affairs meaning the things that are happening the day to day, things, and we would make jokes, and we would laugh and smile. And so the reason was, they were this very serious person, even though of course, his his objective, his life was very serious, but he was not someone that was miserable. And so in this holiday time, you know, make time for games that are permissible, you know, go out and enjoy yourselves in a in a safe and halaal manner, and make an effort to laugh and

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to to crack jokes and those kind of things. This is part of building a happy relationship. Number four, express your loves panela so many Hadeeth of the Navy SEALs, and I'm saying I love this. I love that. Look at this example a man comes to the missiles. And this is just between these are not not biological brothers. These are just Muslim brothers. And so the one man system that I've used as a lump, you know, I love that guy, so and so I love him. And so then a visa Salam says, do you tell him Did you tell him that you love him? Go and tell him when one of you loves his brother? Let him know it so Subhanallah I mean, it might feel strange in our time for me to say to my best friend,

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you say to my my colleagues, to someone that I really admire at work someone that that is very close to me. And so you know what, I love you. You know, this is between two minutes behind the law. And yet this is what the net result is telling you. If you love someone, then tell him that you love him. I love you for the sake of Allah, I love you. You know you make my life happier you bring comfort to my life. Now this is what a stranger your mother, not a family member a friend. What about your wife, your parents, you know, the reasons alone was very, very openly affectionate, and you know, physically affectionate and using words and so express your love. Many times people say

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that, you know I can ever even say to my kids, I love you. This is something which is a not only assume that it is a command from an abuser, that when you love someone regularly to really make

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Get a habit in your life to tell you, your closest family and friends that you love them, and how much they mean to you. Simple Hadith, maybe one that you can even memorize the resources. The hairdo, the Habu for this lecture, something you can memorize a hadith the hairdo means give gifts, the Habu and you will generate love. So in this period of, you know, there's a lot of not a lot of specials, Black Friday, Christmas specials is on someone else. So buy a gift. Get that Christmas special and Black Friday special, not for yourself. But for someone that you love, it will bring about a lot more happiness. And so there'll be some encourages us to give gifts to one another

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regularly that will regularly give gifts. You know, even though he is not, it's not about again, the quantity doesn't have to be an expensive gift. It's just to tell someone, I'm thinking of you. I remembered you, I know you, you said you like this thing. And I thought of you and I bought it it would mean so much more to that person and it will strengthen your your bond beyond just your family and friends, relationships with other people as well. If you especially volunteer work, I've said this many, many times, that if you really want to bring purpose and happiness to your life, give some of your time from you know, take some of your screen time your your Netflix time, you know, one

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hour a week, maximum one hour, two hours a month even and put it into something constructive some volunteer work, a very famous Hollywood man says

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I feel my heart is you know, it's hard. I'm you know, I'm not happy. I'm not, you know, emotionally I'm not right. What can I do? What can I do to make myself emotionally right? Then resources, spend time with the orphan bring the orphan close to you pat him on his head. So it's not just about making an EFT, actually having a physical interaction with an orphan with someone who needs to feed him with the same food that you eat, you know, go out of your way to make someone else's life easier. And resources, this will soften your heart it will bring contentment to your heart, and from also fulfill your needs, it will put Baraka in your life. And so it is part of every Muslims life,

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not just for you a duty, but if you want happiness in your life, give something back be part of some organization, it will really really bring you happiness. And number seven, and the last advice, don't hold grudges. Really, throughout life. There are people that have harmed each and every one of us the people that have said things that have harmed us when we think about this one did that to me. My mother in law said this to me. My wife did that this guy used to be my friend but he cheated. The more you hold those grudges, it is like a cancer and it's a poison. It actually ruins your your happiness emotionally. And it even eats away at your health. Allah says to all of us late the

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believers pardon. So you've been around, keep important and overlooked overlook these things. You know what so and so said about you years ago, what my what your mother in law did you 10 years ago, 20 years ago, so hold on, it's over, overlook it, pardon it and then Allah says to you, would you not love for Allah to forgive you, you keep holding these graduates, but you expect mercy and forgiveness from Allah, everyday we sinned against Allah when we expect him to forgive. But when someone does something against us, then immediately we hold those graduates. Remember those graduates are not just the term, it's not about the other person. It is for your own happiness and

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your own well being. We end up with this beautiful to Allah says about the pious people by the ramen, that they are the ones that continuously on a daily basis, they make this to our robina, humble and ominous wodgina with only a kurata. And Tina, Mama, they say, Our Lord grant from our wives, our husbands, our children, our family members, let them be the comfort and the coolness of our eyes. Let them be the means by which all sadness and sorrow in this dunya disappears. We live in very difficult times. We live in a in the midst of a pandemic, a lot of people are scared. May our family and our friends bring comfort to our lives, may our relationships be the things that keep us

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happy that no matter how tough things are out there, no matter how difficult it is, our health might fail, our wealth might be reduced, but we feel hamdulillah so long as I have my wife, my husband, my children, my parents, my siblings, my friends, and we are happy as long as we have each other then it's as if though we have the entire entire world. So May Allah granted your family and your friends, your relationships, be the comfort of your eyes in this dunya and may we be together in the army. Exactly. Thank you so much. Once again, just a reminder that unfortunately, for the time being Most importantly, Islam is closed. There's no risk if you attend at the masjid. No need to worry.

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We're just taking this as a precautionary measure. And as soon as the situation gets better in the pool cup, we will inform you and we look forward to having the budget open again was Allah Satan and Mohammed who early he was happy with Saddam Hussein. What happened later blood I mean, I said I'm not a lawyer.


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