Forgive & Forget

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Bucha says I forgive but I cannot forget Bushra I hate that that concept I forgive but I'll continue to feel the pain for by myself while the other person lives their life me too

I'll forgive but I'll never forget

I'll never for

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here's as you've been watching a lot of Disney it seems How come

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Bushra

Shafique says hope you will change our mindset about forgive but cannot forget.

Let me change your mindset right now.

Okay, well wait till the question. So let's get

let's get started.

Take one. I said I'm on a quantum delay that I catch up Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala Rasulillah while early he was happy Manuela bad.

Good Mood Morning Vietnam. Today inshallah Tada. We are talking about forgiveness, not necessarily talking about forgiveness of you forgiving other people but I'm talking about the forgiveness of Allah subhanaw taala that's what we're talking about. But a lot of you it caught in your mind is forgiven not forgive

So remind me at the end, inshallah Donna, maybe I'll, I'll mention it. So

I was once in Australia, in Australia, and I was in this town called the Keynes. And if you pronounce it the way it's spelled, it's pronounced Karen's, but they are over there. They say, Keynes. So I'm in Keynes, Australia, and I'm going scuba diving, you know, one of those assisted scuba diving where they just put the thing in your mouth, and you're just like in it in a fish tank. And they weren't giving us this briefing before we went underwater. And they said, as we went into this briefing, they said a lot of people their number one fear in the deep water out in the open is sharks. Most people are afraid of sharks. And so the instructor has explained to us that the shark

is not the most dangerous predator out there in the water. Do you guys know what the most dangerous predator is in the water? This is Australia. What's the most dangerous predator? I'll give you 10 seconds to to write that down. And we got referred just from Melbourne. We're talking about Australia. Okay, so I'll give you 10 seconds to tell me in the comments. What do you think and it is not sharks. What is the most dangerous thing that somebody will face when going in the water? Dina says Stingray I'll give you guys 10 seconds. Somebody else said Stingray. Jellyfish. Patricia says jellyfish. Who else type your answers before the thing as Matt says jellyfish.

Alright, so the most dangerous is ambitious as of now. So the most dangerous is the box jellyfish? The answer is the box jellyfish. So when you think of jellyfish, you're thinking what jellies and fish and this little cute this little cute jellyfish thing. It doesn't sound very scary. Actually. It was a very long time since I, since I looked up if you see a box jellyfish. Oh my god, it's like from your nightmares.

box jellyfish. So actually, I'll tell you, I'll tell you the box of jellyfish. If you guys saw Finding Nemo, the box jellyfish is the scene where

the dad and Dory are going through an area that has all these jellyfish, and their tentacles are coming down. And they I think Dory accidentally touches one of the jellyfish and they get stung and she almost dies. So that's the that's the box jellyfish. And it is very scary and it's very dangerous. So here's what's dangerous about the box jellyfish.

And, and also when it comes to snakes, so when you get bitten, if you get bitten or stung by this, the jellyfish, as the instructor was

Louisiana says it's a pretty pink ones. Yes.

The what's dangerous about it is that

you will die within something like 30 minutes, something like that some, I'm making that number up, but you will die you get stung by a box jellyfish, you will die.

The amount of time that it takes to take somebody from where they're swimming to the hospital where they can get treated and get the poison out of their body is too long, and you will die before that. That's how intense this box jellyfish is. So

the point that I wanted to make is

whether it's a snake bite or any type of bite, it's not the bite that will kill you. It is the poison that remains with you after the bite. And if that poison isn't removed, then that's where the harm comes in. So there's a hadith of the prophets of Allah who sent him that when somebody commits a sin when somebody commits a sin, a black dot forms on their heart, when a person does Toba and asks forgiveness from Allah subhanaw taala that black.is cleansed. And if a person doesn't do Toba to Allah subhanaw taala the black dots stays there, the rust stays there. And if a person continues to sin and not repenting to Allah continues to sin, now repenting to Allah that rust piles up piles

of piles up until it's it seals the heart. And then Allah subhanaw taala says can bend around Allah could OBEY HIM McHenry xe bone that know that you know the arguments that they make with the prophets that Allah is set up. Allah subhanaw taala says it's not these arguments. The real issue is that it's the rust on their heart because of what they used to do. So today in sha Allah Tada one

wanted to share with you how to fight fear, how to fight fear and become at peace. When you look at Allah subhanaw taala as forgiveness when you look at Allah subhanaw taala is forgiveness and that those doors of forgiveness are always open for whoever chooses to turn back to Allah subhanaw taala day, day in, day out, so the first one Allah subhanaw taala says

in this verse Allah subhanaw taala says woman always said Namgyal was only mean knew Barney is needed

for some

junk if a cell phone line was stolen, someone will move on soon.

While I'm walking

in this verse, Allah subhanaw Medina says while in Nevada Mo and for some and if only when they did vote to themselves, that they came to you Joka for stuff for Allah stop for a llama Rasul that Allah Subhana Allah to Allah forgave them

that they sought that forgiveness from Allah subhanaw taala and they asked for good from the messenger, Allah subhana Donna says Lohja De La Hoya to Weber Rahima that if they saw that forgiveness, they would find that Allah subhanaw taala is the acceptor of repentance and dispenser of grapes. Like what are the law had to Weber Rahima if only they come back to Allah, they would find Allah subhanaw Medina to Weber Rahima

and the verse that often gets recited Allah subhanaw taala says, What is the arriba dn ladina and Sonoff one

four cm law telco now to

Allah subhanaw taala says about about those slaves. Oh my slaves, who has who have transgressed all bounds law Takato but Rahmatullah don't lose hope in the in the Mercy of Allah subhana wa Tada. And that's Allah subhanaw taala calling us telling us don't ever lose hope How does that make you feel? When you read that in the Quran and Allah subhanaw taala is telling you don't lose hope in the Mercy of Allah and if you all if they only came to Allah, that they would find Allah subhanaw taala to wobble Rahima

and another verse, Allah subhana wa Tada says, well Mia Min Soo and we have Lim Neff, some awesome master will fit in. The master will fit in La Jolla, JD love of war, Anwar Hema, ALLAH SubhanA data says Romania Ahmed saw an O yo for them NAFSA that whoever does evil or sins against themselves, so my Estelle fit Allah and then asks Allah subhanaw taala for forgiveness Yejide la have a full on Rahima they would surely find Allah Subhana Allah to Allah, Allah for on Rahima the one who always forgives the one who always is the Giver of Mercy and this is Allah subhanho wa Taala when somebody comes back, Allah so they would find ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada or fooled on Rahima there's a hadith in

which the prophets of Allah they send him said

that and I love this this whenever you know a sin is committed and I'm feeling down because of that, and I'm not perfect. This hadith The Prophet said Allah they sent him said, if you are a people who didn't sin, if you were a people who didn't sin, then Allah subhanaw taala would get rid of you. Allah subhanaw taala would get rid of you and bring another people who would sin and then ask Allah for forgiveness and then Allah would forgive that. So ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada. So the point is, and I and I see this a lot, you know, people come to the masjid come to help us come to Sonic reminders, and they feel like they don't belong because they've sinned. But it's actually doesn't make sense

because we all commit sins could look at the Mahabharata as the prophets of Allah listeners and every one commit sins. Well how you don't have been in until I've been in the best of those committed sins are those who repent to Allah subhanaw taala the most so it's not that that oh, you can only comment you're only welcome if you're sinless. Oh, dear brother, dear sister, only sinless people are allowed to that's not the case. Allah subhanaw taala created us that we commit these sins and then we asked Allah subhanaw taala for forgiveness Yeji de la have a full on Rahima they will find Allah subhanaw taala of fuhren Rahima has a floor and Rahim

so that's my reminder for today and I'm actually going to bring up the issue because in the beginning as we were waiting to, to kick off somebody mentioned that I forgive but I don't forget

yet and I said that I would address it but let me finish off this reminder and then I'll address the part about forgiving and not forgetting from a human's perspective.

So, the action that we want to that we want to take is asking Allah subhanaw taala for forgiveness, I said this in the beginning when we first started these reminders, I one of the ones that I said and I love it, I want to say it again, is that we should ask Allah for forgiveness 100 times in a day, the Prophet sallallahu sallam said tubo it Allah He was still futile, to repent to Allah and ask for forgiveness. For verily, I repent to Allah, the prophets of Allah Islam, I repent to Allah subhanaw Dona in a day more than 100 times. And so that should also be our attitude. If you ever sitting down and feeling sitting in your house and feeling a little down, just just do your stuff,

ah, stuff for a lot of stuff that Allah stuff Allah, maybe you don't have time to do 100 do 10 do five do one, but make it that constant asking Allah subhanaw data for forgiveness of stuff that Allah stuff Allah for Allah. If you've been doing that any kind of slack, then this is a reminder to pick it back up again. If you're doing it. I'm dilla conservation. So that's it for our reminder, let me address that topic of

I'll forgive but I don't forget.

So and I was saying that um, so this is a different topic here. This is like q&a Right now we've started into q&a.

I'll forgive but I won't forget that somebody forwarded me this WhatsApp message that says, you know, oh, Ramadan is coming around the corner. So I will. I will start my Ramadan by forgiving everyone. So I responded back that I felt that that was kind of arrogance to this person saying that they're going to start Ramadan for giving everybody the reason I felt that it was a little arrogant is because this person, why don't you start Ramadan by asking people for forgiveness? Why is it that everybody wronged you, and you're the angel. So we all commit sins, and we all harm other people. And we also are harmed, it's part of being human. And if we approached life, as everybody's out

against me, everybody's like, everybody's devil, and I'm the one angel walking amongst all these devils than I don't believe that's the right paradigm and the right attitude to have we all have our ups, we all have our downs. We all have our dark sides, and we all have our bright side. So having said that, we want to start Ramadan, asking people to forgive us because we're not perfect, and inshallah Tada forgiving other people as well. So let me give you a great story about this.

There was a great story about this.

What's crashed my brain is there's a there's a reflection of mine on the story. So I'm trying to figure out whether to tell you the reflection or let me start with the reflection. So I was this a long time ago, many years ago. Hey, Bassam welcome. It's about time you tuned in for my lies.

I know it's that investment. Okay, so

many years ago, I was once in a city and won't mention the city. And I gave a hookah. And, and, and I said something in the HIPAA. And somebody started spreading rumors about me. So I'm putting me down dissing me. And, and I was very angry, I won't go into the details of what the DIS was. Now's not the place to do that. But I was so angry. So I kind of like I did that, you know, I want to punch this person in the face. I'm gonna

slap them. I'm like, I was so angry. And this is like my young days, right? Just, you know, somebody says something is you just get so angry. So my wife saw me responding like that. And she basically was like saying, Your, I don't know if there's kids watching. So I would tell you that.

She was like you, you keep quiet. You keep quiet. Don't talk like that. That's not respectful watcher, watch your mouth, this and that. So my wife kind of like fix me up. So at night, I was like, you know, what's the point of me getting angry at this person? What's the point of me getting angry at this person? And I thought of this following story. So this is the story. And I want you to guys hear the story. Because this is what you can do. In when you want to forgive somebody who doesn't care if you forgive them. How do you forgive somebody? If they don't get like you go to somebody and say, I forgive you. And then and then they say in response, I don't care if you forgive

me. So how do you forgive somebody that doesn't care if you forgive them? This is the lesson pay attention to this

So the prophets have a lot of them said there was a man that used to in the times before the prophesy some of the other other prophets that prophesy, some is explaining that he used to go around and lend money to people, he would go out and lend money to people. And then when the time for the bill collection would come,

when the time for the bill collection would come, he would send his bill collectors, and he would say to them, Go and see if this person needs more time.

And if they need more time than forgive them, you know, whenever we think of bill collectors, we think of people with bats and you know, hitting people on the knees, right? This man is saying to his bill collectors, go and find these people. And if they need more time, then forgive them. Perhaps Allah will forgive us. Okay, so listen to what he said,

Go and collect my this money. And if this person needs more time, then give them more time forgive them, Perhaps Allah will forgive us. And so the Prophet said, Allah, they sent him said, so Allah forgave him that so long as that's his attitude to other human beings. That's how Allah subhanaw taala would treat him. So back to my story. I was sitting there saying, like, Hey, this guy insulted me and I was getting angry, and he doesn't care if I forgive him or not. This is what I said to myself. I said, Oh Allah, I forgive this brother for what he said.

So that you will forgive me and treat me in the same way. I will forgive this brother for what he said so that you Oh, Allah can treat me in the same way so that I can make it my characteristic to forgive others so that Allah you would be forgiving to me. And so the connection then, and I said that that's how you forgive somebody who doesn't care if you forgive them or not, that you make it your characteristic, you forgive them so that Allah subhanaw taala would forgive you and also in the future, maybe you'll come across somebody who you did wrong to but because you always forgave people, maybe Allah subhanaw taala bless you that this person whom you're wrong will also treat you

in the same way Allah Tada

and that's it. Forgive us so forgiving enough for getting out forgive but not forget, I said that that's a really dumb attitude to have. Because what you're saying to a person is if somebody hurts you, and they and they poisoned you the poison is in your body, and you say to the person I will forgive you, you go on with your life and I will make sure that the poison stays in my body for my whole life. I will never forget I will keep this poison and even if you die, I will still keep the poison inside so if anything, you know the person you know you hear this The person who benefits most from for for from forgiving people is yourself. You're the one who benefits and if you don't

forgive the person, you're the one you're only harming yourself that person doesn't know if you forgave them or not. And I say sometimes they've been passed away and you're still holding the poison in your bloodstream so that's why I say that that attitude of all forgiven I'm not forget is the dumbest thing ever. Instead, I will replace it for you with something better do this I forgive this person so that Allah subhanaw taala can treat me in the same way the merciful if I treat people with mercy I hope that Allah subhanaw Dona will treat me with Mercy I'll forgive people

so that Allah subhana Dada hopefully will treat me in the same way Allah awesome that's it. We're done.

Finished we'll Mahana

this question sorrows asking are we allowed to forgive but still maintain boundaries out of fear of being harmed again? Yeah, for sure you can maintain that kind of stuff is just like protects I forgive them. But you know what, let's not be friends anymore. Let's just be you know, Sisters in Islam. You know, if if she sneezes you say or hammock Allah, if she or call 911 If she passes away, you attend her funeral. If she has a will leave and she invites you you attended, but you don't have to be best friends. So if you're just you don't want to hurt the person they say SNAM you say like mister I'm back. Those are the rights of a Muslim to another Muslim. You fulfill the rights after

that you don't have to be best friends. So yeah.

No works.

Anybody else one last question.

But it's hard to forget

what else could this mean?

Alright guys

we're done. I don't want to hold you guys too long. We'll see you. We'll see you tomorrow in sha Allah Tala 2:55pm New York time. Alan Watts island of Santa Monica Rahmatullah betta kettle also visionair. Romo lon is live. If you'd like to join us in Visionaire and make this your best Ramadan ever visionary 2020 is live the website is visionair ramadan.com

as salaam alaikum if you guys have questions, I mean I just gone too long today, but if you have questions you're welcome to come into. We're here every day. You're welcome to pop in tomorrow and we can have a discussion about some of these things. So copy paste it, save it as a note and then bring it up in another session.

Ceremony.