The Prophet as a Husband
Channel: Mufti Menk
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Salam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh Bismillahi Rahmani Raheem Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah he were Allah Allah He was happy he urged my aim, my beloved brothers and sisters, it is indeed an honor to be a part of this beautiful program wherein we are discussing the various aspects of the life of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam, the best of creation, the most noble of all prophets of Allah of Banyule Halki were Accra Maru SULI Salawat Rabi wa salam, O Allah, may Allah is Peace and blessings be upon him. The topic that I'm going to be speaking about is the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as a husband. And what we need to realize is prior to
him being a husband, he obviously is the greatest of creation, Allah made him in order for him to be the final messenger, in order for him to be the newbie or the Prophet with the greatest amount. And we are fortunate to be a part of that Omar, the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam
was a great man, he was known as a Saudi. I mean, something we learned when we were little, in the cases of in the case of most of us, a Sadiq Khan, Amin, meaning the truth full, the trustworthy as a result of his truthfulness, and trustworthiness, he became a husband, for the first time, when I say as a result, that was one of the contributing factors when he was in his 20s. According to the majority of the more Rahim, or the historians, and those who have documented this, he was in his 20s, and he was selected by Khadija been to Hawaii eyelid or the Allahu Ana to do some business. And he had shown an interest in this. He went with her caravans with her wealth to a sham, the Syrian
Peninsula, a sham, And subhanAllah, he came back with beautiful accounts, lovely commodities, and lots of profits. So that was something amazing. It was unique to have a humble person with great character, beautiful conduct coming, being of great benefits, so respectful, so impressive in every single way. This woman who was previously married, was so impressed by this man who was younger than her, that against all odds, the interest was hers initially, about this particular man. So she spoke to one of her relatives and said, You know what? This man is truthful, honest, respectful, hard working. He is a great businessman in the sense that the profits are huge, and he would make a
brilliant husband. I want to stop there because we're talking of the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him as a husband.
Remember, at that time, it was still prior to prophethood. So they were not looking for the deen, but they were looking for the aluk. Still, today were taught when you're looking for a spouse, you look at two main things, the dean, and the whole look, if the person has outstanding religion, and they have outstanding character, that's who you want as the father of your children, as an eternal leader of the home, for example,
a person who will take you through to genital for those, those are the qualities were taught. But prior to Ebola, there were still people like Khadija or the Allahu Ana from a noble home, Mashallah. She was from a noble home. And these noble people still looked at noble qualities. What characteristics do you have pause for a moment? Are you truthful? You're honest. Are you hard working? Are you respectful? Do you lower your gaze when you talk to the opposite gender? Have you thought about it the prophets of Salaam?
Well, I'm wording it respectfully. He worked for a woman who was not even related to him. He did some chores for her. He did business on her behalf. And that was the agreement. So this was not a Muslim woman. It was a strange woman. But imagine the respect, the honor, the dignity, the interaction with the opposite sex. People ask about it, they always talk about it. There has to be interaction with the opposite sex related or not related either way, but it must be within the confines of Islam, respectful as a husband, when you're talking to women who are not related to you remember the respect. Remember the honor and dignity that Allah has asked you to maintain? Remember
not to be flirtatious remember to be such that these people
reinstate and rekindle the respect for men that is lost in today's society. A lot of women would say, men are just a flat men, no matter who they are, they're just like this. They're just like that. That stereotype needs to change because they are good men out there. So the message here is as a husband, when you're interacting with strange women, what should that interaction be limited to, it should be limited to the rules and regulations laid by Allah. Is it okay? If you don't interact at all? Well, to be honest, wherever you need to, you should, you must, and you may have to,
but within the limits. So that's a very powerful point. Khadija are the Allahu Anhu. And he would have never shown an interest in the process seldom had he been a person who's stuck with Allah whose morals were not of a high standard whose values were not exemplary. And this is why it's very interesting to look into this fact. Why was Khadija the Allahu Ana so interested in this man sallallahu alayhi wa sallam prior to prophethood hits another question of the deen. The Prophet Muhammad wa salam never followed the the religion of his forefathers, but rather he was always on the straight and narrow, he never worshipped besides Allah, He never engaged in any form of shirk,
even from the very beginning. So that was a protection from Allah. But there was no advent of Islam yet. Meaning that particular prophethood had not yet commenced. Allah Almighty then
inspired Nabi SallAllahu Sallam to accept this proposal and to actually go forth and get married to this woman. He married her. Now, that puts aside a lot of the accusations that have been leveled against the visa Sanlam to say he was a womanizer, he was interested in this and that every time he married, there was a reason initially, when he married for his youth, his young age and he wanted to get married, he got married, who did he choose? He chose a person much older, much older, the other way SubhanAllah. But it was because she was also an amazing person, do you think he would have married and become a husband, if he did not identify this woman as an amazing woman that will be a
loved one who later to be known as, but he found in her a lot of good qualities. She was upright, she, she loved that which was upright and straight. She was honest, she was she spoke the truth as well. She was very trustworthy, they never had any misunderstandings. And she also spoke to him with utmost respect, previously married imagine marrying a previously married woman that was the first choice of the prophets of salaam from day one. Before the prophethood because he was looking for qualities he found those qualities, she found the qualities in him. And there was an attempt let's try against all odds. I mean, who would have imagined here is the best of creation marrying this
woman he could have gotten any woman any woman he wanted. In fact, later on Quraysh told him when he was 40 Quraysh told him you choose a woman we give you we get you married to later on. Still, he said you can do what you want. I'm not moved by that in these principles, Allahu Akbar. So a lot to learn even prior to the prophethood when looking at Nebby Mohammed Salah Salem, as a husband,
a lot to learn. Then we take a look and we fast forward. The prophets Allah Salah had his children from Khadija Ravi Allahu Ana. She was the mother of his children, he respected her. He fulfilled the duty that he had on his shoulder regarding her friends, regarding her friends in her lifetime as well as after her death. Later on, even years later, after her death, he used to send gifts and things to the friends of his own deceased
wife, Khadija Bella Juana and he used to say well, I'm fulfilling their rights. That is howdy those are contagious. Friends of the Allahu Ana.
You know, you cannot compete with Mohammed Salah salah but you have to learn a thing or two, and you have to try and put as much as you can into practice
within what we as Muslim men are instructed to put into practice and Muslim women too. So Khadija, the Elana was a source of comfort to Muhammad wa salam how many of the women out there are a source of comfort to the husbands? She She literally supported him. She considered him the leader of the home even though she was older. He was the Amir of the house. The decision
shunts were always made by the Amir of the house. That was Muhammad SAW Allah Allah, Allah subhana, Allah Subhana Allah and he listened to what she had to say. He always took into consideration what she had to say. And then ultimately a decision was made. There came a time when he was so fed up with the bad that was happening in society. And he knew his wife was not upon that bad, his wife was different, but his family, extended family, etc. From his relatives, they were engaged in association of partners with Allah in shirk, the major shirk. And they used to engage in lots of misbehavior, bad things, it was known as Elijah Helia, probably the worst from among what was
happening on Earth. You know, when Allah sent the messenger he sent to those who were in the jar heylia itself sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So, he used to meditate, she supported that meditation, she used to support him in everything. She used to speak to him with respect, listen to what he has to say, if he comes home, and he says something, she would comfort him. How do we know this? Well, there are so many narrations that make mention of it. And the mere fact that the de Jabril Alayhis Salam came to him in the cave, and told him, Accra and what happened thereafter, he came running down that particular mount from the cave. And who did he go to? SubhanAllah? When a husband has a
matter to discuss, who does he discuss it with? First, a very important matter today, in your lives. My brothers, my sisters, when a wife has a matter to discuss, who does she discuss it with? Are you the type of mature person whom whatever your spouse is to confide in you with? You would process it correctly, you would give the correct advice you would help and you would be an asset?
are you the type of spouse whom you're the last person who would get to know what's going on in the life of your spouse?
Very interesting question. Imagine if your spouse has a habit that whatever happens, they can't wait to let you know, they can't wait to let you know in order for you to assist. It does not mean in Islam, you need to tell your spouse everything. There are certain things you don't need to tell them. Not everyone needs to know everything, including your spouse, they don't need to know every detail. But when something important happens, how much do you trust your spouse? And to what extent is a spouse going to comfort you or are you going to be a comfort to your spouse? It's a very important matter worth pondering over think about it. The Beast also known as husband, he was not
ashamed to come down to his wife and say, the Maloney's Maloney or the throny etc. You know, cover me Envelop me, I need that tight hug, for example, or I need to be covered. People would be ashamed, shy to say what hug? Do you need to go to your wife and say I need a hug. I mean, what do you need a hug for? Subhan Allah I need to be covered. And what did Khadija the Allahu Allah do? She immediately cannot? What happened? Where will you come here? Explain yourself? No, there was a beautiful environment in the home. This is just as Nobu commenced, she said Kola Walla Hila you Zeke, Allahu Akbar, da ne never. It's impossible for Allah to let you down ever. It cannot happen
that Allah lets you down. Allah will not do that to you. Why? Because you are a good man. You are so beautiful. You fulfill the rights of others. You take care of your family, you take care of your relationships, you help the poor, the needy, you help the orphans, the widows, you are there to help the people on the streets, the sickly whoever else, and she started mentioning all the good qualities of Muhammad Sallallahu. sunnah.
Amazing, amazing. She is mentioning the good qualities of NaVi salatu salam saying very clearly that you know what, Allah will not let you down. Now, remember, they were not Muslim, in that sense in the city. in Makkah, they were not Muslim. But the Prophet SAW Selim was always on the straight and narrow. he worshipped Allah alone, his spouse, the same Subhanallah she was not one of those who was from the ignorance of the ignorant, or the ignorant of the ignorance. No, she was a great woman. She says, No, let me take you to my relative here what AKA a cousin of mine who's actually well versed in these types of things and let's go and ask him and she made the effort to take her spouse.
Remember, he was younger indeed. with utmost respect, you don't make them feel oh, you know what, as it is, I'm older than you know. Age was never ever mentioned. Subhan Allah Subhana Allah. Thereafter, it was never an issue. Never mentioned it.
that way. So
he goes with her deja vu Allahu Anhu. They sit with the cousin and they hear the story. They see it and they hear what he has to say. And you know what he was already told that Subhanallah Your people will turn against you if what you said is true. Your people will turn against you and the day you are asked to convey the message, I hope that I will be alive, but unfortunately he passed on what we know for
now the props are seldom as a husband, let's fast forward. He had his children. They had a beautiful upbringing. His children were with a digital they Allahu Anna and that was an amazing relationship. He did not marry another woman in the lifetime of Khadija the Allahu Allah. Allah had planned that in order for the support that was needed for Nabi SallAllahu Sallam to be given by this particular chosen woman who is our mother, the Mother of the Believers, Khadija Binti waded out of the Allahu Taala catalana.
Allah chose her for a purpose. This is why your spouse, Allah will choose both of you for a purpose there is a purpose you will fulfill either a good one or a bad one. Make dua it's a good one. Make dua it is a purpose that will make you earn genital for those as a result. So you get to Jenna. As a result not you get to Johanna, some people get married, the spouses take them in the wrong direction. That is a purpose you lost. You're supposed to take your spouse into the right direction. Don't become sad when your spouse is asking you to become closer to Allah because that is what your success will ultimately be through. Unless you have Allah unless you have Allah. So when your spouse
is asking you to do things that would be pleasing to Allah, don't be upset. Now. Lisa lamb had a beautiful relationship with Khadija Viola and later she passed away. When she passed away. He was very sad. He was very sad because he lost a great human being. So much so that two or three things happened in that year. It was known as Ahmed Hassan, the year of sadness. It was known as the year of sadness, one year, one whole year, known as the year of sadness. That was the time when the Prophet SAW Salem went too far if as well.
And subhanAllah he lost his wife
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness, he lost his uncle,
uncle Abu Talib, who was looking after him. So that year of sadness, but then the prophets of salaam was taken to Mirage, and SubhanAllah. Thereafter he got married.
And every time he married thereafter, there was a purpose it was not in order to fulfill his desires, his base desires sallallahu alayhi wasallam. That wasn't a primary objective. But there were objectives connected to so many things that Allah had ordained and inspired him. And Allah subhanho wa Taala wanted the dean to be carried on to be taken all the way to us, hence the marriage to it shall the Allahu Anhu and the others, and I shall allow Anna as young and intelligent, someone who would ask many questions, someone who would not only witness what was happening, but register it and process it and convey it. That was one of the main purposes of the marriage with HlV allow Anna
otherwise they hardly lived together for for a long time. Subhan Allah Subhan Allah but she came in for a purpose. Like I said, if you don't know the purpose, go and study it. Here is Nebby Muhammad Salah Salem. He loved his spouses and he was not afraid to express that love. One day they asked him who do you love the most? Imagine the Nebby of Allah pious, pious, the most pious in me, he used to say I am the most God fearing from amongst you are Camilla. I'm the most God conscious from amongst you. And they asked him imagine asking a very pious person who do you love the most? And he looks up to you and says my wife and he says the name Aisha Allah Akbar. As a husband he did that he did
that. Who do you love the most? Aisha then who? Her father Subhana Allah amazing if you look at that, how many of us are afraid to express the love you forget about telling someone else I love my wife so much. But you tell her we don't even tell her that I love you so much Oh him the other way around. Because remember, although we're talking about Nabina Muhammad salaam as a husband, his teachings are beneficial obviously for the women too. So to be able to tell your spouse I love you so much. You know, I really love you I love you the most why not? It's it's from Allah in your heart. And you can love someone the most from different angles Subhanallah
So you have your father's enough, you have your siblings, you have your children and you have your spouse. The love is different angles of love. So you might love your spouse the most in terms of the spousal love, and you love your mother the most in terms of your, you know, the parent parental love, for example, it's a different type of love. But my brothers, my sisters, talking of general love, he declared it he said it as a husband, he would mention it, and he wouldn't be ashamed. Also, as a husband, he had beautiful nicknames for his wives, he would call them something that they would love, you would call them a nice name, some something, you know, make sure that they're happy
Subhanallah and it was vice versa. It was vice versa. So sometimes the women say, oh, you know, the process. Salam had a nickname for his wives. Why don't you have a nickname for me? My dear sister, why don't you have a nickname for your husband to call him something nice. He will appreciate? Yes, it's not wrong. Okay. One might argue, well, this is not compulsory. Nobody is saying it's compulsory. We're talking of how he did it. sallallahu alayhi wasallam. But you'll get a reward of Asuna if your intention is correct. So that was the process. And I'll tell you one other thing. He used to feed his wife with his own hands with his own hands. So take the muscle and feed a feeding
today we would say no, your hands are dirty. Oh, Allahu Akbar. So number two is he said it's an act of charity to feed your wife an act of charity. So yes, to bring along the food and to feed the families definitely also an act of charity, it's a duty something over and above that is to take a moment to put a hand romantically feed them there. Similarly what he did with HR, the law and how he would drink from the same part of the utensil that she drank from looking for the place, you drink it and he would make sure she blushed as a result. I'm shy Subhanallah you become shy because you're full of love. And you know what you full of respect at the same time. Amazing Subhanallah and we
have something very interesting even when they had the food that she would bite into. He would look for the place she bit and he would bite meaning they shared their food.
People might argue well there is a virus at the moment and there is this and that my brother, my sister, the sooner is the sooner Subhanallah that's your spouse you live with your spouse mashallah Tabata cola. I hope that yes, our mouths are kept clean because sometimes we get complaints to say all this guy's mouth is smelling and he's doesn't keep clean doesn't the process Selim used to see work five times a day, he used to clean his teeth five times a day, and more sometimes you know, every Salah and he used to say, Lola and Ashoka Allah Almighty Allah Amar, to whom BC work in the Kula Salah if it was not going to be made difficult for my OMA, I would have asked him to clean the
teeth for every Salah with a miswak Subhana Allah. So that's why you see people want to fulfill that sooner, they have a Seawalk in the pocket just before they start salah they clean their teeth so that they can start off that Salah with a beautiful teeth and clean mouth.
Cleaning the mouth is a very, very important point that we need to make sure being clean in your marital home is something very important, be it your outward cleanliness, your inward cleanliness, the removal of the pubic hairs, the maintaining of your private parts and your areas. Don't be ashamed to talk about it because it is a sunnah to maintain that cleanliness. Do you know that one could actually ask for a divorce or to get divorced if the spouse if the husband was unclean, or vice versa? If they're unclean? To what level? Is that uncleanliness? If they're really beyond what Allah has asked and required, then you indeed, I mean, this person is filthy, they don't even clean
themselves. How do you expect someone to live with them in Nikka to be intimate with them. The process alone was so clean and smart and so were all those whom we know about. There was no complaint amongst them ever. And he taught us you must remove the pubic hair you must do this. You must clean thoroughly when you've used the loo and so on. That's part of Islam the one of the first things you learn why should we be ashamed to mention this? So as a husband maintain the cleanliness, like we would like our wives to dress for us. We need to dress for our our wives as well. We need to make sure we are presentable when they look at us they feel wow, that's my man. That is my man
Subhanallah look at how smart he is. Look at how well kept he is look at how well groomed he is and so on mashallah, my man, sometimes people are ashamed to associate with us simply because we look like people who just couldn't care, we couldn't be bothered. So the processor and Bs are teachings people don't normally mention here we are talking about them.
The prophets are seldom used to also speak to his wives in a beauty
to full way where they would, you know, they would realize this man is making us laugh. And at the same time he is making a point. And he's giving an example sometimes in a way, for example, asked about the love, he tells a shout out, they allow Anna, it's like, it's like a knot. It's like a knot that, you know, when you pull the knot, it becomes tighter and tighter and tighter, and the only thing we're doing here is pulling so this love becomes stronger and stronger. That's just an example figurative speech, because he wants to, he wants to speak to her in a way that she would be happy, she would understand, Okay, fine. You know,
sometimes people say, Okay, you love me, how much do you love me, you know, and instead of putting your hands all the way around, which is also okay, but you can explain it in a beautiful way. And let's take it in a correct way to hamdulillah then the props are seldom used to sometimes do some things that would make his wife happy, meaning his, uh, he would do certain things that would make them happy. Not from that, which is haram. But that which is permissible eyeshadow, Viola Juana says that she used to like to watch these Habashi boys play sometimes. So he covered her in a little cloak, and he would stand with her, he would stand with her from a distance, and make sure she she
watched them play, and then he would take her away Subhanallah in a nice way, just to make her happy. Okay, that's it Subhanallah wow, I might not want to do something, but because my wife wants to do it, or my family wants to do it, or my husband wants to do it. So I will come out and do it for his sake or for her sake to make them happy. And the intention is that happiness is following the Sunnah. And that sooner is earning a reward with Allah, there goes. So sometimes you may have to do certain things. The process alone kissed his spouse's When he kissed it show their love. And
in fact, he says that, even in the condition of fasting, the process alone has kissed he mentioned this as well kissed his wife and he could control himself. I mean, if you're going to lose yourself, and during the fast, you're not supposed to go beyond a certain point. But a kiss is permissible for as long as you control in yourself. For as long as you know, it's not going to arouse you, it's fine Subhan Allah. And the Prophet SAW, Selim also used to lay on her lap.
And vice versa. He used to bathe with the same water. That's something amazing. I mean, think about it bathing with the same water.
It's not deeply explained, but it could mean a few things and all of it is applicable. It's all permissible. So it shows that affection, it shows the trust, it shows the the beautiful relationship sallallahu alayhi wasallam. That's our role model. That's our role model. The profs are seldom
has played games sometimes, or recreation, he has actually taken his spouse out, in order to do certain things I shall the Allahu Allah makes mention of the racing. Now, although this didn't happen every day, and it might not have been so regular, but it did happen. I mean, once in a while you're going on vacation, you can have a little bit of fun here. And then that is an a badass, people think why is this guy doing it, especially when you're a chef, or especially when you're a religious person, but you should? In fact, the more religious you are, one of the characteristics is you become romantic with the right people.
Notice the last words, the right people, because when you're not religious, and when you're not conscious of Allah, you're romantic, but with the wrong people. When you're conscious, you become romantic with the right people.
And this love and affection is felt. And this connection is felt so deep. It's just amazing. So this is the prophets of Salaam. He raised without a shadow of Allah one Hmm. They were on the horses mentioned is made of how there was a time when he one of his wife said, I don't want to ride on this horse because it's too slow. I need a fast horse. So he stopped the caravan and put her onto the fastest horse. And then are you happy? Yes. Now I'm very happy. Imagine you got two or three cars and your wife says no, I want to go in the fastest car. Would you ever think that if the processor was there, he would stop everything and say, Okay, come come. Let's take you in the first hour. Why
not? That's what's gonna make you happy. What are you losing? That doesn't mean he was not the Amir of the home. He was not the leader of the he was the leader. He called the shots. He made the decisions but he always considered what was said he protected his family SallAllahu Sallam he provided for them and they were happy with whatever he provided. You know what I shall the Allah one has something amazing. Because people think, oh, that's the prophets of salaam he must have been. He was the best of creation, the most noble of all prophets of Allah he is but materially there was a stage when the processor lab didn't have that much. So when we talk some people say he didn't have
much some people say he had everything. Those were different stages in his life. Salalah Alesana but I
Shalom. Allahu Allah says in Quran, Allah Mohammed.
You know what that means, even though we were the family of the Prophet, so she's about to say something that you wouldn't have expected because she's saying, even though we were the family of the Prophet of Allah, we had no food in our home, we saw the moon, we saw another moon, we saw a third Moon, which means three months in a row. And you know what? The only thing we had was a TomorrowWorld, Ma, dates and water?
Did they complain? The answer is no. Did they say my husband can provide look at him, we just eating dates and water, they were happy. Because you know what, there are days when you may not have and there are days when you will have a man's test is when he has everything. And a woman's test is when she a woman's test is when he has nothing.
Have you thought of that? Okay, that's not something Islamic. But it's just something from from what we've seen on Earth, a woman is tested. In fact, even from an Islamic perspective, a woman is tested when the husband doesn't have much or loses things, then that's your test. Are you going to stay? Are you going to you may you have a right beyond a certain point to ask out if really your rights are being affected. But if you're patient, perhaps that man might get so much more. You've had so many years of goodness, now there will be years of a little time of tough perhaps years, and then you'll have a lot of goodness again, are you prepared to stay for a good man? For good man?
The answer should be yes, I would for a good man I will. It is not a good man. It's another thing. You're not obliged to remain. When your rights are not being fulfilled. You can ask for a nullification or you can ask for a separation, or even a Talak.
May Allah make it easy for all of us. But the point here is this. They went through hardship with pleasure, because of the goodness of the man he's got Dean, he's got character is trying to earn well, he's trying to earn the pleasure of Allah, he was earning the pleasure of Allah, he is part of those who are going to enter Jannah. In fact, the first who will enter in fact, we will enter through his intercession. So if you're looking at it that way, then obviously he is number one right at the top there. May Allah grant us His intercession, and may Allah grant us his companionship as well, in the hereafter. I can't wait to actually sit and talk and find out more and see and look at
his beautiful face, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Beyond that, obviously, the ultimate would be to see Allah Almighty, may Allah make it easy for us and grant us that day. I mean, my brothers, my sisters.
This is an example when we talk about these things when we deliver lectures. And when we are saying what the Prophet SAW Salem was as a husband, if you are not going to derive lessons and change yourselves, then we're wasting our time. You learn you, you compare with your own lives, and you change your life in accordance with what you've learnt. What's your tongue, the processor never swore. And later on in his life, he always said whoever curses is actually going to earn the displeasure of ALLAH. So he didn't even curse. There was a point when Allah allowed him to curse certain enemies. But then he stopped and he said, No.
This is not something that men would do. Don't curse. May Allah subhanho wa Taala protect us. The Prophet Muhammad Rasul Allah
helped in the home. Yes, indeed, with what he helped with the cooking and the cleaning, not every day, but a lot of the time. So if you take a careful study of that time, there was nothing hard and fast as to who must cook. It became a cultural matter later. And yes, indeed, there are people who would fulfill the roles, people say, Well, you know, you got to bring the food, I'll bring the food, but you got to help me cook it. You know, you can ask your spouse and it's a bonus.
You know, the happiest homes are the homes where the spouses know their roles, but assist each other a little bit in your role, I'll do that. I'll go out and work all day. So I'm going to be really, really tired and so on. I'll expect you to do a little bit while you're at home. By the way, Allah Subhana Allah, Allah grant us ease. And sometimes if both are away, maybe we might be able to collectively afford something that perhaps would help us eat, maybe someone who can cook for us, then we can pay them or perhaps food that is already prepared by a third party and we can pay inherit whatever it may be, learn to understand each other. When I go back and look at the Sierra
and the little that I read just to prepare for this particular talk. I can tell you that the prophets are seldom assisted and helped when it came to the milking of the goats. That means the milking and bringing the milk and whatever else today we have milk and bread when it came to assisting in cooking and so on, they would cook to this day. You know, there are a lot of people who are good chefs who are males. In fact, some of the best chefs on Earth are
males, but we make it taboo simply because we're culturally contaminated in a lot of cases. And we consider it a religious matter, just because it suits us. It's very difficult to come out of that. I am not at all trying to change your situation in your own home, but I am saying, My Beloved brothers, try and help a little bit more. Try and clean up, don't make a big mess, intentionally. Make sure try and help clean up I can speak about myself, I've started helping for a while, a little bit here and there. It makes such a big difference. And you can it's so easy it will take a few minutes if we both tried to do this together. But if you just left it on one, it's a big mission
Subhanallah either way, and my beloved sisters support your spouse's make life easy for them, try and help them in whatever they're doing. Look at Hadith generally, Allahu Allah, she sent the prophets of salaam before Nobu to do the business he did the business he brought in the money, even though she was the one who outlaid that the the capital, even even though the money ultimately belonged to her. But he was earning a handsome profit.
And everything was done beautifully. So if one does this, the other one can do that. And we can both help each other fulfill our roles. So my brothers, my sisters, we've mentioned a lot of points, and I've actually said quite a few facts, quite a few things I want to end off
with a beautiful reminder that you all probably know it's a hadith where the Prophet SAW Selim says her Eurocom Eurocom literally the best from amongst you have those who are best to their wives. He didn't stop there. He says what a hero commonly early and I am the best to his wife
and actually means to his family, and the best family here, wife, children to start with, and then your broader family.
So why did he say that I am the best because that means anything he did or said we need to learn from anything he did or said. We need to learn from another quick point that's come to my mind, the expression on your face needs to be positive. Both husband and wife don't come into the home and have a face that gives an impression that you are so sad and upset and yet you're not making effort to smile if smiling on the face of a strange brother is actually an A baddha for the brothers and the sisters for the sisters if it's an A bad for a stranger, what about your spouse? It is a far greater act of worship far greater. So make an effort come home say good words. Don't get angry. If
not getting angry is a great act of worship then don't get angry starting at home. Do you know getting angry is actually haram to get angry in this way with thee with people for no reason. That's prohibited Lotta Love. That means don't get angry. That is the advice of the process alum He repeated it so many times. Lotta lotta lotta according to a narration the Sahaba says, are the Allah on that hot corner later? Who Socrata we wish that we could have said Oh, I hope that now he it's enough hope he can keep quiet on that one, you know, meaning we've got the point. But no, he repeated it again. And again. Because people get angry with your spouse. start screaming and
yelling, stop it, cut it. Start understanding who you are. You're a part of the OMA of the Prophet Muhammad, Hassan. You're supposed to follow his example in his footsteps. You're supposed to be an amazing human being you're supposed to try to be one. So cut out the screaming the yelling, the shouting the abuse of language, the lies the falsehood, the cheating, the deceiving. They trusted him completely Salalah Salah
and it was a beautiful, amazing relationship. So here goes are you part of the making effort to follow? Make an effort to learn, make an effort to change your lives, husbands and wives. It's about time we did something about what we know. You expand your knowledge whatever I said today, I'm sure you know, but one thing that we're lacking is when it comes to have you changed your life. What are you doing? Did you change Subhan Allah may Allah Almighty grant us Oh goodness, may Allah subhanho wa Taala protect all of us and make us from the best of
you know the best of people. May Allah Almighty help us improve ourselves. May Allah help us fulfill the rights of our spouses with respect with dignity. May Allah make us focus on the Archaea and agenda rather than focusing on pity material things of this world. This world does not equate even the weight of the wing of a fly in the eyes of Allah. So what are you stressed about? Subhanallah no need to stress over the dunya May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us an improved relationship such that together we can engender to fill those Apolo Coley Harada was on Allahu wa salam ala Nabina Muhammad Subhan Allah Who behind the Subhanallah Hama behind the kana Chateau a La ilaha illa and
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