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Lecture Our Children Raising The Bar

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Mohammed Faqih

Channel: Mohammed Faqih

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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The

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story that I mentioned, that I actually heard this morning is fresh.

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It's

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maybe fictitious or maybe true, I'm not sure. But But the story has the moral of the story is

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it's very relevant.

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And basically, forever

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telling me about a story that had just been modified.

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So he was talking about

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the set of towers that was threatened by flood.

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And they have to prepare for this flood, to protect their town and to protect the people

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to survive this, this flood.

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And there were three reactions to this. When they heard about the warnings, the first staff did not take these, these warnings seriously, they're like, Oh, it's like, every time they say, you know, we're gonna get a flood was a big deal, we're gonna be okay, we're gonna survive, so they didn't do anything.

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The second time, took some radical measures. And they actually did not have time and effort, people did not come together.

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Maybe they're like, okay, let's just hire some.

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Some people get some construction company and build this, like huge data.

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Set them in place strong to withstand any any force of water. So they like, we're just gonna do that. He's way out. Those city

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planners and engineers, they built this, to build this. The third city is something different.

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They both

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didn't have a lot of time for everybody to join. And there was a sense of urgency in the process.

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results to train, the storm came hit, flooded.

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This was the result.

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The first city that did not do anything, was totally submerged under water destroyed, barely anyone survived for

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almost everyone was disturbed.

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The whole city was just wiped

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the second city, the levees, were able to withstand that immense pressure of the water, could they eventually crack with a crack, some people were able to get up, but eventually it gave it

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it was another devastating result. Most of the city

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was destroyed, most of it not all of it

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was devastated. And a lot of casualties. A lot of

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the third city where people came together and work together, they came up with a brilliant design. They said this is very powerful pressure, we won't be able to face it with just one single, you know, wall, so maybe we should do something else. So they came up with this brilliant idea that was out of this.

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You know, collective effort and collective thinking and what they did, they said, Let's dig around the city and throughout the city, the sacrifice a little bit, we may not be able to get up.

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Conveniently, we might have water running beneath our houses. But let's just create towels throughout the city and around the city. So the water came. That was right, we didn't get a chance to collect as the water came, it went through those channels, and individually receded, you know, and that's it. And almost everybody survived. Nothing.

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The moral of this story is that in life, we get challenged with all kinds of challenges. And we get pressured

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as individuals, but also we get pressured as and we get threatened as societies and communities.

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And there are some threats that mean that threaten the entire society or the entire community that we won't be able to face with staff, or preserve or protect ourselves and our families from individually as individuals or even as families will have to come together as a community. Put our efforts together and channel those and help one another and channel those those dangerous elements around us around our children and protect ourselves. Because time is of the essence.

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Great level of privacy before you know what your child does, when they're teenagers. And there's little you can do

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and I've been saying this for the past

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A few years of working with a youth, I remember having a conversation with my own brother saying, Listen, we kept there are some people who have to take my family go to a very nice city, they live in the suburbs have a nice house, and I'll be able to my wife and I will be able to buy tickets, you can't, you can't you have an entire culture working against you swimming, you're swimming against the curse, you can

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just beyond any one. And of course, there are some successful stories, there are some families that were able to make it. But these are the exceptions weak, you can't really go with the exceptions, these are the exceptions, the norm is that we are losing more than we are really gaining or protecting our children.

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So what do we need to do, we need to come together as a community.

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Watch out after each other. I mean, there was another clip that I wanted to show you, we can remember me.

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I don't know if some of you saw it, but someone actually sent it to me. Right?

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I might be able to show off a little cap, they were never attacked. Bye. Bye.

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few lines.

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And they were able to catch the cap, the moon cup. And then the buffaloes basically ran away scared of the lions. And then they came back and they fought the mother, but they all came together to say that happened, they were able to say that

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it was very touchy, I mean, it was very good.

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She would have not been able

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to stick to the jamara. community come together. Right? He said

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for the wolf attacks or frames on the break on the

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on the sheet, scrape that straight away from the hurt. That is when you come to get it, it's very it will be very hard likewise, shaper.

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Or impatient, or any elements out there, they will not come to a community or people who come and stand together are facing those challenges. And

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many of us, you know, who came from let's say from

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from the east, from the Middle East, especially those who grew up in a small town where everybody knew everyone, you know, you have a support system.

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You had almost the whole neighborhood or the hope of raising the child and reinforcing the balance. Usually, you know, families have very, you know, their values and their numerical. So everybody reinforces

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if you're not seen by your father, you're seen you're caught by your uncle, taught by your uncle, your pup by your father's best friend or something. So you're always in check. But it doesn't work like that here.

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It doesn't, not when you're surfing the net not not when you're on YouTube, or you're going in your you know, having your own profile on on Facebook and some of the poorer.

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MySpace, not as nice, not not embarrassed, it's not.

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So we have to really come together and talk about these issues over and over. I'm not sure if I talked about the rights of children, but we need to, for the sake of parents who have children for the sake of those of us who will have a show on the future children for the sake

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for the sake of our graduates, we need to know what the [???]ty I want to start said about the rights of children. First of all, what are those beautiful things changes that Islam brought is that the change the mindset of our children in just during the days of Jeopardy, and many people thought that children were a burden.

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They want to further and that's why they would bury or kill, emphasize was was practice. Right? They were ashamed, girls were ashamed. They will bring shame on that's why I'm so children were a big burden and the reason you know, metal families and those days for

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boys or girls is because it boy will will help you know his father. He will become a knight he will he will help him and more he will defend them this is about having not a family but having a gay was about just building the strongest again around as possible.

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When it's not a chain of command.

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Every every creature

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creates the risk assessments. The assessments isn't the head of the last panel.

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Right and I was a professor

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of law

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And emphasized by the way it was whether it's,

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it was condemned by the Islamic law from the, from the get go from the beginning. You know, with Tony, along with that those kind of

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practices were that there was no gradual process, you can't have this gradual process. When it comes to drinking alcohol, there has to be

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so many things to hear. But when it comes to this kind of Mo, practice, it was immediately condemned. But it wasn't kind of a time to also show that.

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You know, it taught us that children are a blessing. They're a gift from from us.

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So early on the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was told and he was taught that prophets before him I knew for him, and

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Zachary, they prayed, the last panel to Allah give them the gift of children probably have the

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means, give me the gift of present to me

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is heaven. Heaven is gift, a present from the last lesson. And him I cannot be something negative, something always positive.

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And then I'm also gonna praise the believers, who prayed what was happening with Allah, and ask Allah to grant them the gift of good espousal and good children, when the Nina marunong

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will talk about making our children because some of us don't, we only make them when they get in trouble.

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And it's sometimes maybe too late.

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Maybe too late live.

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So it is a gift also slammed set. And I'll just repeat some of the points that I mentioned in the book where it was a beautiful we're not here. It's not also said,

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or the word actually considers

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case to be Xena. The

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last panel, Madonna, first of all, they said, HIPAA, HIPAA, which means a gift in store to shoot on verse 49, verse 50, it was it led me to seminar it will give

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me an email media in some way.

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Yeah, he gives the gift of females to whomever he pleases. And he gives the gift of boys or males, I was originally gonna let you know that some families are blessed with both combination.

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This is a lesson from a lots of hard work.

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So this is a gift of a lesson. And

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whether it's a boy or girl, it's the same.

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It's a gift from a lesson.

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Because we don't know which one will turn out to be better. The boy is not better than a girl, there has not been. In fact, in this area. This is the beauty of the

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total mothers, a mother that might lose a child and her life, he will become a chef he will intercede for her mailbox and preserve our children, they may not cause any of you to suffer a loss of income spiritual.

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And also the promise of

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the men that any man that raises two or more daughters that takes care of them.

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That they will become

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they will become a protection for him for her.

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And today I'm setting the hook with that if your child is righteous

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if your child is righteous,

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because if it happens that the child comes away in your lifetime,

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was trapped reserve with children that knew our patient philosophy. Basically, that child has made it to paradise Memorial, and they're waiting for you to catch up.

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So be patient, and you will catch up with them and they will become protection for you from health. protection.

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If you die in your child's lifetime, and your child experiences

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then you are not actually dead. Because we have an extension you have a righteous child that will pray for you. The Prophet says in Matthew Adams

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11 his deeds the good deeds will be seized except from three things. There are three revenues. Right. Number one is

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right.

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Either initial knowledge, some kind of knowledge or medicine the left behind that people are benefiting from so when someone is benefiting from that you get the reward

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as long as something beneficial

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Whether it's a matter of

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as long as someone is benefiting from it, you will reap the fruits of number two, sort of a

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continuous champion something that people building possible and

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it's functional and people are using it, you get the recorder. And the third one is

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a righteous child that will pray for you.

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And if that righteous chap has a righteous child, chances are if he's if he's righteous, blessing with the righteous child, then you're going to continue to

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happen until

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now, unless, of

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course, children and Xena beautification, a dormant of this life. You know, you know a lot of people they might have, they might have everything in life, that should bring them happiness, but if they have, they don't have children, they will be the most miserable.

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Well, the children if you have to have children,

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it's the worst feeling. If you have children, and you don't have one, it's also the worst way

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you feel. So the combination of both is what makes life beautiful, and enjoyable.

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Now, all of this is a reality. I mean, children are a normal person, if we raise it properly, otherwise, the Quran and the Bible, verse 15, have lost power in

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your children, and your wealth, your wealth, and your children are but

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just trial tribulation, and fitna has different levels of

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tribulation, and it could be like the worst thing that ever happened to you. So one has to be very careful. Or

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the next one is the next level. And this is this could go too far. And guess what the last panel

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in the same surah actually, later in verse four in a lost power. That's it? Yeah, you had the Nina and in the mean, as well.

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Indeed, some of your spouses, some somebody might say, yeah,

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some of your spouse's and some of your children may be enemies for you.

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So this fitness tribe will turn into a monster, it will turn this person will become an enemy.

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And the worst thing is if that child becomes your enemy in the Hereafter, and sometimes they might become enemies in this life.

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And you see children and sometimes cursing their parents for plotting against or wishing for their deaths.

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This was the direct cause of your existence. And this is how you are.

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So we have to do something.

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And there is always there is always hope. And it's never a song you're breathing and you have

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another day to live or you have you have a chance to believe it's never

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someone might say, but Oh, my children are too old. No, I can't do it. Yes, this is something that can be done. And we'll talk about that as we go on. So what are the rights of our children?

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Right now that we know the significance of children, what are the rights of children.

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When it comes to the rights of children, there are two types those that

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evaluate the prepared production actually from a lecture given by

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chef,

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Chef.

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And somehow this this is what we were talking about this morning.

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Or maybe yesterday. I met him when he was young when he was when I was in high school. And he came to give a lecture we were

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when I was part of that. And he gave me a lecture and he was maybe in his 30s or maybe less than

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I've never seen some of his his age, that just simply sitting and just watching his demeanor, increases your email,

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will listen listened to his lecture.

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He affected me more in his demeanor and his interaction with him that his lecture was you didn't pay a lot of attention.

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But we sat down with him and we had

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an amazing personality, amazing level of knowledge. He gives lecture when he speaks you think that he's reading from a book and he can listen to his lecture in Arabic as well.

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Lucky they increase your email. But there's something amazing about them. The reason I mentioned all of this, I'm not trying to waste your time, there was something amazing.

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He has now got maybe 50.

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I have just learned from one of his cousins whose doctor is doing PhD

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in public health.

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He was a pediatrician.

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He told me that he had just gotten married recently.

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And a lot of people were very critical. You know, was it a secret?

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His mother,

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he was so passionate about.

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And he was serving his brother all these years. And he was afraid that if he gets married, as a parent, sometimes this abuse proposed to him, that he may not be able to fulfill credit of his wife, because

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and if he was to do something for his wife, that might be at the expense of his mother. So he's happy.

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So this is from his lecture. So he talks about two, two types of rights, the first type of rights, the first category is that which comes before the

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arrival of the child, before that, you actually have to check for the birth of the child. And the second one is after they come into this, so the first one before they existed, the second one is after they are existing.

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And, and I was asked about both, because sometimes some people just find themselves overnight.

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Like they find themselves parents just happens,

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just like oh, my God,

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you can't do this you can't afford to do if you're not.

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If you have already,

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you know, become a parent,

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welcome device.

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It is very important that we understand the objective of having children. And this objective has to be very, very clear, because it has to do with your need, right? Because sometimes people just do things for the heck of

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930 and the people sit and they complain, because I want my child to be better with my child to be 20. Now I want to be able to have grandchildren when I was still able to walk. So

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just because or maybe they want to have children because their mother in law said it's about time to have.

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I just want to shut them up. So let's just have one baby takes its power.

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So those rights start from before the birth of the child before the arrival of the child, I will give them an amazing panel analogy that I was given by my brother.

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And I think very interesting observation, you know, in the story of

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the family,

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and

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then the wife of Enron

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in

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she's dedicated she she was pregnant. So she dedicated that child and she probably thought it was to the to the church or to the to the to the place. Of course,

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she dedicated that chapter.

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devoted that chapter wasn't

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thinking that it was it was when she gave birth to a female.

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She said

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what he said

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when he said

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he said

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money May peace be upon

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when

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she asked.

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She actually asked for exceptional service

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and exceptional service and last

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but not in

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the chosen one. The best one ever done wasn't

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me superior to any other ad. She was an exceptional individual.

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So she asked for an exceptional

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an exceptional daughter.

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And then it was many who gave birth to the exceptional son.

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This, he said there is a lesson. It takes an exceptional woman

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to bear exceptionalism and bring in such

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inserted

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a son that changed the course of history.

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So it takes an exceptional woman, in order for someone to be the mother of raising money.

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It has to be someone at their caliber. And if you study the history of the Scotts Valley, you'll find all these exceptional people they had exceptional,

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exceptional mothers,

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to bring to this lab exceptional.

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Child, that's why the promise of love to the man to the men that go after the person that has character that has, and he said to the women, and their family go after or except the man was kept personality.

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So that's what the person has to do, choosing the spouse that will share with you,

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this parents with raising this child, your partner in life, that will raise with you a family, that is the first right your child have

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that choice has been made very well, the story of Roma, only a woman and the boy that came, the man that came complaining about his son, the first right

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reminded the father with it is that he should have chosen for him to do

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this. So this is this is the first right that the child has upon their parent, either the father or the mother or

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another right in the child. And it could be done before the birth of the child or after the birth of the child. Right is

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the name

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is the name. And the name is very important because the name of the cellist his name or her name will stay with him for the rest of his life.

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And the scholars talk about this journey, we have certain names that don't mean your children those names, because they have limited or bad connotation. Some names may have positive connotations, but they may not be appropriate.

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I don't want to give examples, because some people might get devastated

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like for example,

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are certain certain things

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needs to be said because if someone said for example, that I go home and the person said no there

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is no there is no such a such a presence in such a thing, there is no other way.

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Besides, that may be true. But nonetheless, the name has to be has to have positive connotation, and it has to be inspiring.

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Because the name effects the personality of the person.

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It cannot be just something that sounds good or negative. Nobody gave that name. Nobody chose that name ever. You know, some people got some some weird days that they don't even know the meaning of just because it sounds good.

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Or because nobody else has.

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The

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best of names are

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they have very positive means imagine someone who will always remember that.

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And by the way, it's not enough to give them a name.

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You have to explain to them what that name means that they have. This is what I meant by raising the standards raising the box. You have to tell them that you got this name, you can't be messing around with this kind of thing.

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You know, one of those most horrible things that I've heard is when someone said well, why very few people want that. You know, you know that nobody gets drunk metaphysica Mohamad gets drunk.

00:29:13--> 00:29:18

So one has to explain to the child what this name is and from from their,

00:29:19--> 00:29:21

from their child.

00:29:23--> 00:29:25

Because this is the name of the property

00:29:26--> 00:29:27

despite

00:29:31--> 00:29:43

the problem is a lot of valuable sin and even this issue of names is very important because the problem went as far as changing some names that have negative or bad connotation one time in the process of learning.

00:29:45--> 00:29:46

And he said to him,

00:29:47--> 00:29:59

the problem was your name Lisa. aside, which means difficult or harsh or harder. If mom said no but at the center of the show. That turned out to be later on as well. It was his favorite center.

00:30:02--> 00:30:02

But

00:30:05--> 00:30:12

it was said also that I wanted to call the sons how war because he wanted to be

00:30:14--> 00:30:19

married the first job he had he brought into the province. And when you made him he said how

00:30:23--> 00:30:24

scared he was a night he was a warrior, I

00:30:26--> 00:30:36

don't know. But what it has no name, but he's rather an asset has the next challenge he had a year or two later, he brought into the process of the closet.

00:30:38--> 00:30:45

promises. But what I'm saying is rather than say, the third child son, he had, he brought the crops.

00:30:49--> 00:30:50

But what is it?

00:30:51--> 00:30:58

So he got out of the system. Later, after death, after father's death, he married a woman.

00:30:59--> 00:31:02

And he had assembled her last name.

00:31:08--> 00:31:13

So the process of not accepting those kind of names that have negative connotations.

00:31:20--> 00:31:27

The second write that the child has in addition to their names are some of those students that the process have taught us like a piece

00:31:28--> 00:31:29

of paper

00:31:31--> 00:31:35

sacrifice parents make on behalf of the child.

00:31:36--> 00:31:44

The problem is very important that the Scots settle according to it. Now, if a person did not have

00:31:45--> 00:31:54

their parents is not working for them, then they should do one on behalf for themselves. So if someone knows that their parents did not do Akita for them, they should do that.

00:31:55--> 00:32:08

And this one, she was the girl, two sheets for the boys. And sometimes we might say why two sheets for the boys, because it's twice harder to raise a son and a girl.

00:32:09--> 00:32:19

And raising boys is as twice that is harder. It's a lot easier to so you're you're giving more to ask them to help you.

00:32:20--> 00:32:21

There is nothing.

00:32:30--> 00:32:32

I've always had an argument. No, this is my

00:32:36--> 00:32:37

mother.

00:32:38--> 00:32:50

My mother have three sons. And she has six daughters. My oldest two brothers, they left America long time ago, and I was the one son with six guys, six sisters. And it was

00:32:56--> 00:32:58

it was a lot easier to deal with sick daughter.

00:33:05--> 00:33:09

So those rights, giving the child the name.

00:33:12--> 00:33:18

Number three, offering from early on offering that child low

00:33:19--> 00:33:30

compassion and offering that child that and expressing that compassion by being affectionate. This is one of the rights children. And I mentioned this someone might say well, this is very,

00:33:33--> 00:33:33

very cool.

00:33:35--> 00:33:42

And I've seen this. I've seen this in front of my eyes. The problem that is dealt with with a father like that.

00:33:43--> 00:33:51

One of the branches of the problem was brought or his own son was brought in running to the processor played with it and then he just

00:33:52--> 00:33:59

and he was he was so after the one of the Chiefs have

00:34:00--> 00:34:03

been with me. He saw problems.

00:34:06--> 00:34:18

This is not mentally. You're the problem of this is he didn't think it was meant. He said indeed I have said further to the puppet. I have 10 children 10 Sir, I have never kissed anyone.

00:34:19--> 00:34:26

Besides they used to think you know with a boy you should have been compassionate. They should not be affectionate. You should be rough with him. He should to be rough.

00:34:27--> 00:34:29

So the promise of the last one.

00:34:32--> 00:34:33

So what can I do for a

00:34:35--> 00:34:36

deprived one.

00:34:39--> 00:34:42

So it is prophetic. And it is prophetic that is many

00:34:44--> 00:34:56

is prophetic. That is the right thing to do to be affectionate to show affection. selling the day after that not even his own children. The process needs to be merciful and compassionate with other children. If he would hear the cry of a baby

00:34:57--> 00:34:59

during the salon he will speed up the salon.

00:35:00--> 00:35:02

For the sake of the lecture,

00:35:04--> 00:35:17

so one has to show compassion and mercy and love. And that's what we nursery them with. That's what leadership if you wonder why we live in a world that is merciless, yeah, there's no mercy there is senseless and

00:35:19--> 00:35:27

senseless crimes, very cruel world. And you should just go and actually shouldn't be doing this to go look at those

00:35:29--> 00:36:05

horrible, horrible you cannot believe human beings do these things. When I saw the other day a clip that brought tears to my eyes off and leopard, a wild animal, showing mercy to a baby monkey, he killed the mother of that baby monkeys. And then the monkey the female monkey was was pregnant, she dropped the babies, this leopard left that is killed. And he came back to this little monkey. And he started, he started petting it, and he started licking it. And then he picked it up, took it up the tree in particular.

00:36:07--> 00:36:12

And they were showing it on National Geographic, the clip is much

00:36:13--> 00:36:13

worse.

00:36:15--> 00:36:16

And,

00:36:17--> 00:36:17

and this

00:36:19--> 00:36:20

edited that clip the

00:36:22--> 00:36:25

senator that is not chosen.

00:36:26--> 00:36:27

Where

00:36:28--> 00:36:39

the Prophet mentioned that a lot divided his mercy and his confession into 100 parts. One part he brought down to this earth. And that's what was divided once.

00:36:41--> 00:36:53

The Prophet said to the extent where a horse will not step on his baby out of this tendency or out of this instinct that are left that came from the mercy of a loved one. And 99 part was

00:36:54--> 00:37:01

left off or preserved for the year after on the Day of Judgment. So there will be a lot of mercy on the Day of Judgment, by the way.

00:37:02--> 00:37:08

But we have to work for it because the law said only those who work hard or those who really deserve diversity for Well, we get it.

00:37:11--> 00:37:19

So we have to have that we have to nurture that we have to express it, you can't just hold it anymore. I love myself, I'm so proud of myself, when was the last time you told him that

00:37:22--> 00:37:24

expressing expressing affection, physically,

00:37:27--> 00:37:29

verbally put it.

00:37:31--> 00:37:36

That's the second, the third write that they have. The fourth write that they have is teaching them

00:37:38--> 00:37:40

the purpose of their existence, the purpose of

00:37:41--> 00:37:42

what a law committed,

00:37:44--> 00:37:54

what you brought into this line for what is their purpose, the problem was similar as our own purpose, or the purpose of our existence is not even clean.

00:37:56--> 00:38:03

And we have to learn from it. And we have to come to terms decide. So our responsibility is to pass on that to the last

00:38:04--> 00:38:18

one of our insanely traded men and Jin Jin and men except to worshiping, so you have to pass from that message. And if you withhold that message, or if you fall short in delivering that message you're responsible for

00:38:20--> 00:38:25

passing on that lesson in early art, make your children realize that they're the service of a mother,

00:38:31--> 00:38:32

who is a walk

00:38:37--> 00:38:46

in history still got in there never to be able to know about that some people, sometimes they're scared to be scared, I don't want them to get paranoid and have that be able to sneak

00:38:48--> 00:38:54

my way will be paranoid and get scared when they are connected with the one that really this is how, in fact, there will be

00:38:55--> 00:38:57

lots of hands on that project to the

00:38:59--> 00:39:01

young cousin, he says

00:39:03--> 00:39:03

in your annual

00:39:06--> 00:39:08

preserve a lot in a lot of preserving

00:39:09--> 00:39:15

and vandalism that we think that they're too young to understand or comprehend and they're not smart enough to know they are.

00:39:16--> 00:39:23

And don't you don't have taught them like maybe Allah is the one that I'm assuming that he knows all the laws and

00:39:24--> 00:39:30

just talk to them what they understand, especially when it comes to talking and those issues will not and they will

00:39:31--> 00:39:41

they might ask you some question that that shows that they are thinking that someone came to me as a 3d artist, my son asked me, you know, there's a lot created everything who created it?

00:39:46--> 00:39:46

And I know that's

00:39:49--> 00:39:59

a silly question. Motion is a smart question. The product actually said to the adults, to the adults. He said one of you might have the stock chip on my end

00:40:00--> 00:40:04

To him, If Allah created everything, then who created he said that today there's

00:40:06--> 00:40:06

nobody here to

00:40:13--> 00:40:22

pay the muscles. She thought that's the only thing he could do throw in these kind of silly and self destructive,

00:40:24--> 00:40:25

illogical plus

00:40:27--> 00:40:35

is greater than he's ever created as a creator and so forth. Logic Finally, in addition to understanding that

00:40:36--> 00:40:46

he's gotten great at everything, the one whom we worship, then he must not have a greater than he was a tournament there before anyone there after everyone first

00:40:48--> 00:40:51

you come to this conclusion and you will be up

00:40:52--> 00:40:56

and you will develop that will trigger that fear of spectacle was coming

00:40:57--> 00:41:04

to power who would raise a cup of tea, but what is available? What what what, what what what about

00:41:05--> 00:41:06

so they can come back and

00:41:08--> 00:41:12

allow to not be created because of us power? That is the creator of everything?

00:41:13--> 00:41:26

Just, you know, answer the question I have not for who those answers were, you know, you know, don't try to dodge it or just straight answer, they will be able to

00:41:34--> 00:41:36

she was three, of course her wishes.

00:41:38--> 00:41:39

His view

00:41:42--> 00:41:43

was much bigger.

00:41:44--> 00:41:45

Is my

00:41:46--> 00:41:47

size

00:41:50--> 00:41:57

was mature. Wow. And I could see that your email increase, right? Wow.

00:42:01--> 00:42:03

Logo metal says to the study,

00:42:04--> 00:42:36

guide associated others with a walk in the ship. For ship is the greatest of all artists, we need to teach them about justice. So that means his son under understood was one of those early things that we need to teach them values and principles. Like justice, we can't be unjust. You can't be cool. You can't hurt other people you can't be why would you beat someone? Why would you be your little sister? Why would you be someone else? Because they're weaker than you? Would you like someone to hurt you like them? How does that person feel? Put yourself in the shoes?

00:42:38--> 00:42:40

Of all? Is you associated

00:42:41--> 00:42:45

with that? or denied a lot? Since he's the one that created? How can you do this?

00:42:48--> 00:43:00

Does this we have to be concerned about this issue and learn a lesson from property rights. Are they set up? Who was very concerned about this? Yeah. his grandchild, when he was dying? What did he say to his children?

00:43:01--> 00:43:06

What are you going to watch. So this has to be done at a very, very low.

00:43:11--> 00:43:36

Number five, we have to set the example for them. One of the reasons they have children by nature, not all of us need role models. This is a human tendency. This is a human need. We need role models, someone to look up to. So we have to set the example the first person that they will look up to are the mothers, the father's their mother, their mothers, their fathers, and then someone else that will have to go beyond that. So right there you have

00:43:37--> 00:43:44

you need to teach them about the Prophet and the companions. The true super ego is not going to speak superheroes and I'm really

00:43:46--> 00:43:46

having

00:43:50--> 00:43:51

the mouse

00:43:53--> 00:43:58

Mouse settings palliside By the way, some of those some of those target older, they have

00:43:59--> 00:44:07

like a little mouse watching the world from outside. And he's the one taking care of everyone when someone gets in trouble. He's the one that comes in service.

00:44:12--> 00:44:12

Now

00:44:16--> 00:44:19

teach them priorities like salatu salam.

00:44:20--> 00:44:42

He said the problem never recommended. He never actually insulted any child or any servant or any woman never the problem and he does not recommend or encourage hitting children's Coronavirus. You remember when we were responsible for children who have left them when I was in high school, I was teaching elementary school students

00:44:43--> 00:44:51

one time that some of them started misbehaving. So we started hitting them and beating them just to reprimand them or to discipline and shift at the lowest

00:44:52--> 00:44:52

level.

00:44:54--> 00:44:55

He was very upset with that.

00:44:58--> 00:45:00

These are the days where it was

00:45:00--> 00:45:00

Okay.

00:45:07--> 00:45:10

What do you want to raise? What do you want to produce donkeys?

00:45:12--> 00:45:22

breeding and getting physical produces nothing but donkeys. And animals. That's not what we want to produce, produce people who are people who care the right people

00:45:24--> 00:45:26

to produce in terms of

00:45:28--> 00:45:29

us watching.

00:45:32--> 00:45:43

But when it comes to the supply, that's the only time it will send them gave the parents, either workers or parents to hit their children with one condition whether the Prophet says, move,

00:45:45--> 00:45:50

order, teach them, encourage them motivated to pray at the age of seven.

00:45:51--> 00:46:12

And maybe, then after that, by the age of 10, after three years of training and encouragement and motivation was removed, you may hit them only with soccer. Unfortunately, nowadays, parents, if a child gets a B, or a C, or they fail, or whatever, they get big.

00:46:14--> 00:46:15

But when it comes to the salon,

00:46:19--> 00:46:19

we will learn

00:46:22--> 00:46:23

Indonesian nuts

00:46:25--> 00:46:28

when it comes to why, and he didn't say anything else, except salon.

00:46:30--> 00:46:36

Because I've been critical, it's a very, and that's what I meant by teaching them the priority. So just listen.

00:46:38--> 00:46:48

And you may make you know do about things I'm not I don't approve certain kind of behavior. But you know what, when it comes to some of that I don't compromise. Again, we have to set the example ourselves.

00:46:51--> 00:46:54

And then, of course, teach them noble qualities,

00:46:55--> 00:47:14

and also teach them skills in this life that they will be able to use to survive in this life and excel in this life. Right? So you have is they said this, God said that it is the parents responsibility to teach children skills that will help them get through this thing.

00:47:15--> 00:47:15

Now,

00:47:16--> 00:47:18

whatever skills,

00:47:19--> 00:47:19

whatever

00:47:21--> 00:47:34

lessons you want to teach them, right, there are positive, effective ways to mirror some negative destructive ways of doing. And that's really what I wanted to focus on at the end. But I have to go through this. Just as a reminder,

00:47:35--> 00:47:45

brothers and sisters, some of us use horrible methods that have been proven to be failing for a long time, ancient methods that never succeeded.

00:47:47--> 00:48:04

And this cycle of abuse continues this chain, and someone has to break it. The problem is, nowadays, we can't afford to do this. We can't afford to do this. The problems on the web, send them teaches us a method, I was talking to the school teacher

00:48:05--> 00:48:27

for the past two days, about one of the qualities that a teacher has an old teacher must have and also parents should have educators ever anyone who's who is passing on anything to someone else, they will have to have this quality, actually to be one of them. Actually, they're kind of of each other they feel what is positive thinking.

00:48:29--> 00:48:30

Positive thinking

00:48:32--> 00:48:39

with which comes optimism. And number two is encouragement and empowerment. Inspiration

00:48:40--> 00:48:42

inspired who was the thing that the other day

00:48:44--> 00:48:51

someone in the audience? Remember we are having our kids are not inspired whatsoever? What would you like to do in life? I don't know.

00:48:53--> 00:48:55

The only thing that inspires them the boys especially the boys, you're

00:48:57--> 00:48:59

are video games at a certain age when

00:49:00--> 00:49:03

it comes to the girls fashion nonsense.

00:49:06--> 00:49:21

So they need some inspiration, they need some motivation. And that doesn't would not happen unless the person that so that you are this inspiration, have that inspiration to listen and you will not have inspiration unless you yourself have some kind of optimism and positive outlook.

00:49:23--> 00:49:40

You have to be positive positively. That's why one thing one bad thing that we did as well is communities. Organizations is we lower the bar, our expectations of our children is very low. So we keep lowering the bar by having just you know Muay Thai just just just

00:49:42--> 00:49:42

by

00:49:45--> 00:49:46

having a syringe.

00:49:48--> 00:49:48

There are a few

00:49:49--> 00:49:55

uses this analogy over and over again, I'm not sure if he when he came here to use this analogy. He said if you have a car and you hate

00:49:57--> 00:49:57

and unhappy

00:50:00--> 00:50:09

If you do not aim right to the target, if you aim right at the target, chances are that you're going to miss if you're going to go below, because one thing that we have to calculate is that we shoot an arrow and

00:50:10--> 00:50:36

it goes, it falls down, depending on the distance, and I'm talking here, physics, right? So you have to aim higher, a little bit higher. So when you fall short, you hit your target. If you want your child to be here, here, with the expectations, and the goals of yours ethical, so they fall short, they go, they won't go where you want.

00:50:38--> 00:50:57

But if you we keep lowering the standards and lowering our expectations, then there's all the expense for me, I just want you to get in trouble. I just want you to get it through. Don't cause me she don't bring a shame on me. Don't embarrass me. Let people say anything I

00:50:59--> 00:51:00

use this word over and over again.

00:51:02--> 00:51:08

In this work, especially in the society, we live in a society that doesn't know or doesn't know.

00:51:09--> 00:51:13

What do you mean, I don't care what people say whatever, I'm here with you.

00:51:16--> 00:51:18

And they become desensitized. I'm not saying

00:51:21--> 00:51:22

that that does not work.

00:51:25--> 00:51:29

And one of those ways is by raising the standard.

00:51:31--> 00:51:36

Done with all of your affairs and all of your responsibilities from sub Get up.

00:51:37--> 00:51:56

We need to tell them to expect much more from being capable You are a giant You are a force you are this word that I expect much more from you, as a parent on those days where my father used to encourage me to expect much more from you. It used to work better. If there's one thing that the children read for

00:51:57--> 00:51:59

is what? Like, what do you want from your parents? What is it?

00:52:03--> 00:52:04

What do you think is

00:52:07--> 00:52:08

crazy praise God praise?

00:52:12--> 00:52:13

What did you want from your chip from your father.

00:52:16--> 00:52:17

But something else?

00:52:21--> 00:52:21

acceptance,

00:52:23--> 00:52:30

trust, trust, they want to be trusted, wanted to be trusted. And that's what we need to offer. That's what

00:52:32--> 00:52:37

we need to encourage them. We need to encourage them and empower them to do that.

00:52:38--> 00:52:45

Never allow anything negative. If someone one time makes fun of the other child, don't don't sign always.

00:52:47--> 00:52:56

You should love them all equally, you should be you should be just talking about this issue of equality. You're all beautiful sometimes why I know I know. That, for example, they might have

00:52:58--> 00:53:08

you know, maybe a handsome boy in another one was not so good. So maybe a girl was a little more fair than the other one is how much feminists teach their children prejudice.

00:53:10--> 00:53:17

I know people we know where we're one of the sisters would just, you know, make fun of everyone else because she is a little more fair,

00:53:19--> 00:53:21

as his wife,

00:53:23--> 00:53:32

or maybe have been called risers? Where did that come from? Well, when children pick those kind of messages from other than their parents,

00:53:35--> 00:53:37

we should learn from the story.

00:53:39--> 00:53:51

So we have to be very careful, we have to be very, very, very clear. And by the way, encouragement does not mean pressure to some parents. Right? Put pressure to this, I was getting that.

00:53:53--> 00:53:55

From an NBA star and a brain surgeon, and an

00:53:57--> 00:54:02

all in one. This might work in machines 3141. But it doesn't work with

00:54:04--> 00:54:09

some people I wish to have was to be happy. I wish to be neurons man wants you to be

00:54:10--> 00:54:13

in the same town, maybe the future president of the United States.

00:54:16--> 00:54:22

So we have to be realistic. encouragement has to be in the position of

00:54:24--> 00:54:29

understanding their skills and what they like recognizing their strengths and building one.

00:54:30--> 00:54:38

But again, it's convenient. I know and I will conclude to this story. I've told this story actually show you the video.

00:54:39--> 00:54:42

Since regarding this issue of encouragement, can we throw away

00:54:48--> 00:54:57

all the rather the story of this lesson is for those of us who think that it may be too late.

00:54:58--> 00:54:59

may be too late.

00:55:03--> 00:55:06

So so that some of the candidates if you want to

00:55:08--> 00:55:08

get serious

00:55:12--> 00:55:13

about story

00:55:20--> 00:55:26

today, he is one of his children what x one is Rachel that actually

00:55:27--> 00:55:28

left us

00:55:31--> 00:55:37

a big huge cross, just sitting on the greatness of the grave of his grandfather,

00:55:39--> 00:55:43

his grandfather, and his father was part of the government. And it was it was right

00:55:45--> 00:55:52

when he lost his life, but maybe because we connected back with online newspaper, and he was so generous last time.

00:55:54--> 00:55:59

And even that service or that service was, that was amazing, because

00:56:01--> 00:56:09

this is how after his death, some of his children who did not used to pray over a period of years, now only two of his grandchildren became,

00:56:10--> 00:56:10

you know,

00:56:12--> 00:56:15

born and raised here in America. Born and raised in America,

00:56:19--> 00:56:22

it's possible to start schooling

00:56:24--> 00:56:35

and maybe not one of those, one of those so successful religious grandchildren that he has a big drop from him, maybe one of them will give out. They will come back to the show.

00:56:36--> 00:56:41

But it's never, never, never. It's never too late.

00:56:45--> 00:56:47

I have to do some exploration with this video.

00:56:50--> 00:56:52

This video clip is titled

00:56:54--> 00:56:55

cycle.

00:56:57--> 00:57:04

What Why do they cry? Why do they fall and it will show you two scenes.

00:57:08--> 00:57:20

But it's an error. Some of you might have noticed that. But it will show you to see see number one issue, it's enough to see the whole thing. They will run it again and I'll explain to you as we go on.

00:57:21--> 00:57:22

Once

01:00:10--> 01:00:23

This one, these are two teenage boys from one of the Gulf countries. This boy is crying. He's really passionate. These gentlemen, don't cry. His cry is devastated because his favorite team lost three to nothing

01:00:25--> 01:00:30

to one of their rivals and he's crying. And he's talking about how you know, they lost and he's so devastated.

01:00:31--> 01:00:34

That's the number one that made a lot of people laugh. The second scene.

01:00:37--> 01:00:46

This says, He cries, he is actually finishing the memorization of the Boolean for AP. And the background. I don't know if you recognize that or not.

01:00:50--> 01:00:57

This is his young shave. This t shirt. This is him. Same almost same age, that boy.

01:00:58--> 01:01:07

Right? And he is reading the last two soldiers of the air. As he's finishing his cotton memorization of the time, he has faded from memory he knows.

01:01:09--> 01:01:19

But he is so touched, that he describes and this is the edited version, the other person, you can see the shift handing him tissues.

01:01:25--> 01:01:29

When this moment comes back with the second one, it will be more of an honor.

01:01:32--> 01:01:36

Where did he get that from this mother encouraged him what it is.

01:01:37--> 01:01:38

And guess what the

01:01:40--> 01:01:41

doctor met

01:01:43--> 01:01:47

with parents, and they will be dressed with a special dress, they will be

01:01:50--> 01:02:04

if that child wasn't given the right and the honor to intercede for 10 of their household 10 members from the hospital who may have deserved Hellfire they will go to Paradise because

01:02:05--> 01:02:06

this is the difference

01:02:07--> 01:02:12

is is something that we are capable of doing as for the system, we are available

01:02:13--> 01:02:15

all the time for our children,

01:02:16--> 01:02:20

and what we make them believe they're capable of doing.

01:02:22--> 01:02:30

These are 21st century kids. One of them was raised, and his passion was soccer which kind of edge

01:02:31--> 01:02:34

there was. And the other one is passion was

01:02:36--> 01:02:43

in the book of a lot of a lot of private says one of those people who will be provided with the shade of the Day of Judgment. This

01:02:45--> 01:02:56

is a man who cries out of the funeral. Another category of the seven people who will be provided the shade of a mother that judgment is a young boy who grew up in the obedience of a lot.

01:03:00--> 01:03:07

This extraordinary generation of our time to show up, they're going to change the course of history. We have amazing people we have over 10 in

01:03:09--> 01:03:14

this community we have you know some people that were born and raised here in America things that we

01:03:17--> 01:03:17

must

01:03:19--> 01:03:25

preserve preservative must give us all the the guides have the strength to implement the

01:03:26--> 01:03:27

interface.

01:03:30--> 01:03:39

There's any question inshallah in about five minutes if you have any questions are more than happy to address them. ignore these clips.

01:03:47--> 01:03:48

Anyway.

01:03:50--> 01:03:51

Yes.

01:03:53--> 01:03:53

Yes.

01:04:12--> 01:04:13

Well,

01:04:21--> 01:04:21

good.

01:04:27--> 01:04:28

Jimmy.

01:04:29--> 01:04:37

Jimmy, Jimmy, the sister has asked me in the headache mentioned that a lot of people said that was really the Son of God.

01:04:39--> 01:04:59

That is the actual or the good deed will be seen or there will be no more source of goodness except for three things and one of them was what I just talked about will make your So does that mean only the talented recruit but the person that is at work, you know, this child will always be what will always remember their parents that they dropped by the group

01:05:00--> 01:05:03

rents, and he was so hard to spot. So

01:05:06--> 01:05:07

remember

01:05:08--> 01:05:08

that remember,

01:05:10--> 01:05:20

he said, one of those things that I asked I was so concerned about is is that the African like issue that I said to him? How do I, how do I ensure that I keep remembering my father.

01:05:22--> 01:05:25

So he said, name one of your children after the father

01:05:26--> 01:05:27

and his father.

01:05:34--> 01:05:36

However, if the father

01:05:37--> 01:05:45

was the cause, or the inspiration behind that child's righteousness, anything that that child does,

01:05:46--> 01:05:53

especially those that they were inspired by their parents to do with their parents, the parents will automatically share their

01:05:54--> 01:06:06

children. And when I say share the Word, I'm not talking about 50% 50%, no, I'm talking about the person who does good deed will get 10 100%. And the parent will get 100%.

01:06:07--> 01:06:13

And the parent makes up for the child, when a parent makes you out for this child or her child.

01:06:14--> 01:06:19

And when the child makes draft for the parents, it will be accepted. Why? Because it's a genuine drop.

01:06:32--> 01:06:32

Yes,

01:06:34--> 01:06:34

you are

01:06:37--> 01:06:45

going to believe there is no God. But these kids are curious and ask you but

01:06:48--> 01:06:49

you have to tell

01:06:51--> 01:06:51

tell

01:06:53--> 01:07:17

the family, they're crazy that knowing last pattern of data is a natural inclination. It's part of our innate nature, no matter what the person or anyone tries to do business with trying to make the most out of data. We have this natural inclination, we have this natural. So we would ask children will eventually, you know, they will ask.

01:07:19--> 01:07:20

But if you

01:07:24--> 01:07:28

imagine someone asked me about one creative, don't tell me what a crime

01:07:30--> 01:07:32

that we all have. Or at least,

01:07:34--> 01:07:34

I believe that

01:07:36--> 01:07:37

he's the one that blesses me.

01:07:38--> 01:07:39

And

01:07:43--> 01:07:44

we have tomorrow.

01:07:48--> 01:07:53

I am personally against those radical measures that sometimes people take

01:07:54--> 01:08:01

after they have gotten used to TV and you go home and you take the TV, just throw it out the window, doesn't work, I don't know.

01:08:03--> 01:08:09

I don't believe you need to take the TV and the love of that they need the attachment to that DVR cameras.

01:08:11--> 01:08:11

But

01:08:12--> 01:08:14

we don't have to accomplish all these things.

01:08:15--> 01:08:22

And this is what these programs are all about msgid coming together, you know, the youth program. counselors are people

01:08:26--> 01:08:31

in the room and the application came from the Bay Area and today, you know, the sisters were

01:08:33--> 01:08:34

pitted against sister

01:08:35--> 01:08:40

we can evolve collectively as one big family. And if you are having a hard time

01:08:43--> 01:08:52

with a righteous man, he has knowledge he memorized but had not had not been to those older brothers who wanted

01:08:54--> 01:08:54

to capture.

01:08:57--> 01:09:07

This is something sometimes children return to their parents or family members. One of those things were logging we learned how to respect our parents,

01:09:08--> 01:09:09

for example,

01:09:10--> 01:09:15

and one thing that I extended in addition to the families consider the message it is

01:09:16--> 01:09:28

essential if you have any concerns or issues come talk to us and inshallah we'll make if we have any concerns or any issues, please make us feel free to come to you and address without having to feel

01:09:30--> 01:09:34

very scared. You know, they might trust some counselor,

01:09:36--> 01:09:36

Doctor,

01:09:39--> 01:09:46

Counselor, and we can't break that trust but we have to work together. We have to work together and he imagined sometimes.

01:09:47--> 01:09:48

I mentioned this.

01:09:49--> 01:09:59

parents may be so satisfied so proud of their straight A student as a straight A son. I knew someone was like that and he was

01:10:00--> 01:10:07

on hard liquor, he was alcoholic, he had tequila, he had all kinds of hard liquor under his bed

01:10:08--> 01:10:14

without his parents having any. And same thing happened sometimes with with girls to

01:10:15--> 01:10:20

try drugs, they're so depressed, so depressed, behind.

01:10:21--> 01:10:26

So we need to really help the show up, we'll provide

01:10:27--> 01:10:32

you more information about counseling sessions that we have today, there was a press release. And if you go home,

01:10:34--> 01:10:41

you might might see some clips of some of the press conference that we had regarding

01:10:42--> 01:10:45

the Chief of Police Department.

01:10:47--> 01:10:55

Deputy and myself is one of the questions that were asked by reporters, and they're very concerned about this is the radicalization of the

01:10:56--> 01:10:59

terrorists, or children, and this

01:11:01--> 01:11:06

is a common activity, participate and find outputs

01:11:08--> 01:11:13

and activities that we have. Right? They are the furthest from these kind of activities.

01:11:14--> 01:11:21

You don't have to Why? Because they learn. They learn at home. That's not the individual value principles.

01:11:24--> 01:11:33

And our values and principles are what they are consistent. And it's not an answer, not justified, as do not justify the means

01:11:34--> 01:11:42

ethical and moral principle. And also, we provide them with Atlas like this open house that we have to do something constructive,

01:11:44--> 01:12:06

do something constructive, and express themselves with their views or their beliefs, and tell people who they are what they stand for, through through those kinds of constructive activities and programs where they educate and give doubt. But when we suppress them, when you deprive them, when you rob them from the right of having spiritual growth, this is what happens to them one of two things, either they're gonna get lost, or they might get shot.

01:12:08--> 01:12:11

or drugs. And I know, a lot of

01:12:14--> 01:12:15

people that

01:12:16--> 01:12:17

got lost.

01:12:18--> 01:12:19

Totally All

01:12:20--> 01:12:38

right, they say they get home, they're depressed. They're studying with, you know, as they study, they go surfing the net, they see all these websites, and they see all these information and those graphic images. Right, and, and they will be, they will be angry, they will be frustrated, and they won't have to answer those concerns.

01:12:41--> 01:12:59

So this is it. This is where they can go to become a constructive, they're going to learn to be positive they're going to learn to be to be, you know, to be true Muslims who who do the right thing in the right fashion, for the right reason. So we asked them to

01:13:00--> 01:13:09

come together and help all children have a better future in this lifetime. This is our This is our country that we have a very

01:13:11--> 01:13:23

We are very proud of Michelle this Sunday, they were even more proud to show my mouse we have about 30 of the volunteering shows legit, the use of the counselors and everyone is talking about

01:13:24--> 01:13:29

it. Again, I'm giving away any comments or any questions that you might have some opposition whatsoever, right?