Channel: Mohammad Elshinawy
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smilla hamdulillah Soto, Samana rasulillah Allah Allah He was buried within the name of Allah all praise and glory be to Allah. Mais finance peace and blessings be upon His messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and his family, his companions and all those who tried his path. We welcome everyone back to the best of stories, the story of Yusuf Ali Salaam in the Quran. And we left off last week with use of Allah He said, I'm valiantly and heroically
belittling the odds that were stacked against him and refusing to give into the wishes of the wife realizes.
Allah azza wa jal says at the onset of the Iet we are discussing today was step up Al Bab, and the two of them went racing to the door. What that means or who mean do both, and she tore his shirt from behind. So he was ahead of her as he was leaving to runs for the door, she tore his shirt from behind what I will say either her little bad, and they found her husband, Master husband, her say it at the door, or like mad men managers. So she, she spoke first. She said, What is the repayment? What's the, the recall the competence? Or the the punishment? What is the punishment for a person who wishes evil for your family?
Other than meaning I will accept nothing other than Him being imprisoned, or receiving a painful punishment.
And so, a few stops This is very quickly, I mean, first of all, she was adamant to get her way with use of Allah, his solemn. And of course, he was adamant in his refusal. And so just keep that in mind that when you want to stick to your principles, people don't just ask nicely for you to, like departs from your principles and your morals and your values, and then they go away. And so you also have to
be adamant seek refuge with Allah azza wa jal and don't decline politely and just stay there. You gotta, you know, decline firmly and get out of there. You know, Yusuf Alayhi Salam did not just say I seek the refuge of Allah.
And then she said, Oh, all right, in that case, never mind. You know, that's not how it works. And it's almost an almost never works that way.
She kept pushing. And so people always push you to harass you to step away from your principles. And so you need to get out of that area before you weaken. And this is extremely important. She he raised for the door and she raised after him even that wasn't enough.
Our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam for example, for bid us not forgiving
drinking wine. The Quran forbade us drinking wine. But when the poor and told us stay away from wine, the prophet Allah His Salatu was Salam explained that further when he said to us do not sit at a table where wine is being circulated, because like no one in their right mind does that no one in you know, that values, their faith is going to put themselves in a situation thinking I'm strong enough, you don't know how strong you will be. Likewise, this is not like perverted, thinking, it is more about the reality that we don't stay behind closed doors with a non relative non Muharram of the opposite gender. You know, it's like, I think we should be past the age of thinking, Oh, my God,
what's what's going to happen? No, it doesn't have to happen. No one said, it's going to happen that on the first time, right, but if you stay around flames, they're on sparks, they'll eventually get your clothes. Most fires come from belittling sparks. And so it may be a word, you know, between you and her or you and him. And then a few months later, it may be, you know, joke itiveness then after joke activeness You know, it just it happens like that, as they say emotional infidelity lies at the heart of and is the primary reason behind, you know, the physical, full blown infidelity and adultery. And so, before we we
complain that it's inevitable that we keep relapsing into sin, and I don't want to visit that website anymore. I don't want to go back to that, you know, anymore. Well get out of there. The place fearing Allah, if being genuine, your repentance needs to necessitate
in your mind me not putting myself in a place where I'm likely or more likely to fall. That's important. And then
they got to the door and
they found something that that they never thought they would find at the door, which is her husband. You know, think about it. The white woman Ozzy's picked her timing pretty well. And she locked the door. I mean, she was methodical, she planned this out. It wasn't just a spur of the moment thing. She picked a time she picked a place she made sure to lock the door as as the previous I'd say. And so she was positive, there is no way that her husband would ever discover this. And then some final law lesson Tim's piano without him.
And he exposed her in that place where she felt most safe. And so we should never forget this that we are never safe when in our plotting from Allah counter plotting, right? allies counter plotting as allies though, just say FME no macro lines with a lot of did they those people I destroyed? Did they actually feel secure from the plan of Allah. Now let me know macro law it will come soon. And no one is secure from the plot of Allah, except people that are bound for loss people that are losers except the losing people. And so they got to the door and then use the valet Sam is there.
Some would say shirtless. Allah knows best if the shirt came entirely off or just had a tear in the back. But he had a tear or torn shirt, ripped shirt.
Shift I didn't see if he said something really beautiful abstract. What's really cool about this, just a lesson to think about the extended to other scenarios. He said never ever look down upon a person because of how like dusty or greasy their hands are or their face is or how rip their clothing is. Because sometimes it is actually their guilt, their dignity in one way or another that causes them to look like that, you know, not just in the capacity of Xena no think of it also in the capacity of,
of begging. He insists he would rather be the poorest dressed person than ask people for financial assistance. Right.
And that is a beautiful thing, right? Our Dean, of course comes from both sides, it tells you, you know, do everything you can muster, to not ask of others when it comes to like financial assistance. The other end, the dean, the Quran tells us be aware that there are certain people that you may not consider poor because they're not starving, but at the same time, they are sometimes the most vulnerable people because they're overlooked for their poverty. They're not quite making it either.
The province I'll set them said that the miskeen is not like the, the miskeen, the needy person, like the poor person, the poor person, you give them a meal and he walks away. The needy person is the person lay the funny level. People don't notice. And so realize that sometimes when you're looking at a person's appearance, there may be things you don't notice about their appearance
or things you may even be critical of in their appearance, which is actually something that
The root cause of it is something very pleasing to Allah subhana wa tada like dignity.
There's also a lesson here that they didn't before, but there'll be a lot when I read it for him years ago on the, in the in the field of like, you know, the marital infrastructure that our laws though that organized our lives with, he said xojo say you don't have enough data my favorite Companion of the prophet SAW Selim said xojo the husband is a seed in the book of Allah.
Is the seed of his home is the seed of his marriage says here yes could mean master per se, but not master where your mind may wander right? If you're that
ego does the killer, you know, chauvinistic male type.
But it does mean doesn't mean that he dominates his family, but doesn't mean that he's the director of his household, the director of his family,
you know, for sure our Deen differentiates to such great lengths. Because of the the possibility of misuse of this, our Deen goes so far to tell us men about the limitations of our leadership. But we should at the same time, not go to the opposite extreme and dismiss the authority of the man in the house altogether, just because some men selectively read or don't read at all. And so they assume that they have a right to abuse their authority, you know, our Dean differentiated and showed us the fine line between authority and abuse of authority. And tonight, or this lecture is not the place for that. But what I do want to say is we want to appreciate that the dean did actually place for us
a mechanism to avoid what they call decision paralysis, right? Like,
too many captains sink a ship. And so four major decisions on love pinpointed who's the tiebreaker This is not to disparage the woman in any sort of way. But at the same time, it could really threaten the whole house in a very serious way for this not to exist, this balanced understanding of leadership in the home.
like think about the fact that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when he said he's not going to tell us that on FISA 13 for a mural I had that come when you are just three people on a journey, imagine a journey like a half day journey, you would still be obligated in Islam to pinpoint one of you identify one of you to be the image
that shows you number one, the importance of having an immediate having a leader, a tiebreaker, in case, you know, we disagree at some point this way or that way, stop now for us or stop later. All of these things right, just having the relief and the protection for the unit, the union, when there isn't I mean, that's and that's all that not just the importance that had it also shows you that it there's no there's no disrespect, if you're not being the leader. I mean, people shouldn't seek to be leaders anyway. But when there is leadership, we should see that that's a good thing. Otherwise, there would be chaos without it. And so if a little half day or one day journey requires a leader in
our Deen so how about the long journey of marriage? How about the complexities of family life and all of these pivotal decisions? Sure, there's going to be consultation and there should be in kind treatment and you know, love and mercy and tranquility and the home that's the spirit of the home. But the home also has a spine like it has a backbone I don't mean spine as if like you know, stick your chest out and bully people No, it needs like to be erected. It needs structure, so that it can take steps forward without toppling over. That structure was placed in the book of Allah and the Sunnah of the prophet SAW Selim. And even hear the hold and carefully calls her calls him her say
the seed of the woman, her leader, her her man.
Interestingly, also on this very point,
some of the scholars at FCA have said look, Allah said they raced to the door and found her say it.
After I gave all the disclaimers, let me translate it as master now
for a very specific reason, because the word master is the only one even though it'll apply differently. It is the only one that would apply to both use of Elise
and the wife, right? Because this man is a seed of both or so we thought. But the or and so elegantly tiptoes around that inaccuracy and doesn't make that inaccuracy a law, as some of the scholars have said could have said like if it wasn't around, right, they raised to the door and they found or they found their say it they're saved at the door.
But the Quran didn't say that. Why didn't the Quran say there say it? Why didn't say they raised her say. They said because Yusuf Ali Salam was abducted and so he was sold into slavery he was purchased by this man through even though the man may not have known it but through an invalid transaction and therefore use of didn't correctly validly belong to this man. Right wasn't under his jurisdiction. Islamic limited
in the sight of Allah subhanho wa Taala and that's why the Quran said they ran per se. And just look at how precise the Quran is. And always think the Quran did not come down. With like an editing process, the Quran came down in spoken word. And so to be so accurate and so consistent and so precise, when you're speaking verbally,
is something that is impossible policing your language. That way over the span of 23 years, like our prophet SAW Selim did, is humanly impossible. And that is one of the reasons we know the Quran could not have been his word, Sal, Allahu Allahu alayhi wa sallam.
And so they
found at the door, she immediately said, Well, what is the punishment for someone who tries to do X, Y, and Z with your wife, except they be thrown into prison, or they be punished severely. Some scholars even said, notice, she didn't say that they be killed. Because normally ordinarily, many civilizations, so of the only way to wash away dishonor is with blood. And so the expectation is killed so that some scholars said it's as if this like, cunning woman
wanted to make sure that her throwing him under the bus didn't get him killed, because she was so interested in him. So she said, she made sure to remove by giving the options to remove murder from the option, or execution from the options. She said, prison him or punish him. So that not because so that he would not kill him. And Allah knows best use of violence. And I'm responding to going on to the next I nl Allah, here are the two neon FC.
She said, he said, she is the one who sought to seduce me.
What can we say about this?
First and foremost, she said a lot. What is the punishment for this? So she spoke first, she was like dramatic about it. She threatened, you know, or suggested, which is threatening right? suggested her husband to do you know, these carry out these punishments on use of La salon? And he just said, No, it wasn't me it was her. Sometimes you speaking first, sometimes you speaking louder, sometimes you being dramatic. And the theatrics of your complaint
are actually very telling of your weak position that you tried to compensate for. And sometimes you letting others speak. And you speaking in brief words, and commonly when you speak is actually very indicative of the fact that you are confident in your position that you stand properly in the property in the right place, you're on the right side of the law, and also your confidence in Allah subhanho wa Taala. And if you're a judge, obviously, you're not going to be that,
simplistic and superficial that you're going to judge based on who's the calmer party. But the idea is the plaintiffs the one that speaks first is not necessarily the innocent party.
And the person who's simply defending themselves could very well be the innocent party. And also the person defending themselves not to being
you know, so shaken up by the accusations could mean I mean, they could be also really good at hiding their emotions and manipulative and all that stuff. But it could also mean it's not evidence independently, but it could corroborate the fact that this person does not seem guilty.
And so people's reactions can corroborate
other proofs regarding their guilt or innocence, that's just something to say in passing. Also, the importance of defending yourself, you know, some people say I'm going to take the higher road and I won't defend myself. Usually, that's, that could be a good thing to do. It's endless, right? You have a trajectory you have, but sometimes when accusations
are going to be so detrimental and not responding can be can have people assume that you don't have a response. Every once in a while responding is not in any way, shape, or form beneath you. You're going to respond calmly, as we said confidently, without being vulgar. You're going to you know, choose your words carefully and all that, but there's no problem responding. I don't use a valet setup through the accusation back in her face. And so it is not in dignified to respond to accusation in a dignified way.
And then on laws. dogen says shahida shahidul Minnelli has someone from her family
He testified as to what is a fair way to measure this. He said Look, look at the shirts. If it's her sure, if his shirt is ripped from the front, then she's truthful and he's lying.
Because that means he's the assailant and she's like trying to wrestle him off and she ripped his shirt while he's on. You know, the attack. He's the aggressor, but if it's ripped from behind, he said, then clearly she's the one that is trying to prevent him from getting away from her.
She's the one that is trying to bring him onto her.
And so she's the assailant. And the fact that someone else has from her family said that
reminds us of something very important that objectivity is important and of the best ways to,
to cite your case or to you know, cite as evidence for your case, is to look for people that are not,
you know, people that that will defend you blindly, like the Allah azzawajal cited the kuffaar of kurush, and others other than polish, about the morality, the flawless character of the prophet SAW Selim, why, because they're not people that will defend him support him, you know, if they could escape it, but they couldn't escape it, because lying was very shameful to them. So that is a part of it.
Another part of it, is that our Dean, sometimes the Shetty forbids a parent to testify for their child, right? Because that is unlikely going to be a place where objectivity will be found.
the truthfulness of Islam, there's nothing wrong with it at all, so long as you're doing it properly, you know, you're not just
just slinging whatever you find. be thorough about it, make sure that actually saying that, make sure this is a correct line of argument. But scooping from
someone who would be more critical could actually be stronger at times. And maybe time will not allow for, for examples of this.
Another thing to be said is that he's here now, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi, WA, the prophet Yusuf Alayhi, salatu salam, he's here now needing to defend his innocence. He just said it's his word against hers, at the base of it, even if he's being calm, or to be more dramatic, but it's really about not the accusation, denial of the accusation. It's really about the onus of proof. And so what was the proof? The proof wound up being the shirt? You know, sort of, like you can imagine, use a valet salon, when he found when the door opens for a moment, it's very possible that he felt like, Oh, I'm done. She just gained the upper hand. It's her family there, right.
You know, it's me with the ripped shirt. She's the woman she's accusing. She's this, she's that. And not realizing not realizing that the ripped shirt that he's worried about, like I look really bad right now is the very thing that will save him.
And so, you know, learn remember, keep in mind that the temporary wins of the oppressor should never bury you in grief, you know that your rights that are usurped from you your like proverbial shirt that is ripped off of you, the tears that fall from you,
what the wealth has taken from you. These could be inconveniences, or we're looking at them as inconveniences they could be very drastic, tragic, right? But just with the confidence in the believer, learn to shrug them off and say temporary wins, inconvenience.
And also, but alongside saying that what will help you tell yourself that is the fact that this alumnos could be the very thing that saves me, like this was the canoe that saved him from drowning the fact that his shirt was ripped in a very particular way.
And so when they
saw the shirt was ripped from behind,
and when it comes down to love, it catches everyone
distracting me from explaining, I miss you all for the sake of a long Allah gatherers upon fade wherever you're reaching out from a brother, family and everyone else. We love you all for the sake of Allah and we ask Allah to come by gather us upon faith, and read the world of of this virus and not make us of those who forget this lesson trust.
Okay. So when they saw his shirt was ripped from the back, they said it is they said to her in the home, in case you couldn't it is from your schemes. In Nikki they could not I'll leave your schemes are certainly great, certainly immense. And so in a desperate attempt to save herself, the wife of an Ozzy scheme, right, they recognize that she schemed here to frame use of La Selim as the villain and herself as the victimized damsel in distress. But that very quickly crumbled, right they saw that they saw right through it, they saw that it was a scheme and people in general should be very leery. very cautious, not to cite the victim card even when they're right. By the way, the
victim card to fast because the victim card usually comes back to haunt you. Like, you know, when you're like you're looking for leverage, whether you're to just cause or not to just cause when you're looking for leverage, and you like you, you scream victim.
A lot of times it comes back, you know, to slay you, right? If you choose that as your weapon, the victim card, because if you're not being honest, and you're calling yourself a victim, and sometimes you are being honest, and you exaggerate, so you're not being honest, right? You discredit yourself until you corner yourself further, when we're saying victim, victim, victim, victim, victim victim, you corner yourself into a place where your entire just cause gets dismissed and discredited. And so you put yourself in an indefensible corner. That's number one. Number two,
even when you're being honest, and you embrace victimhood, right, it's something that's very common now and you know, in the pursuit of justice, this idea of like victimhood being the you know, what to harp on victimhood, whether we realize it or not, it can very likely reinforce in people.
The notion that you're weak, and you're desperate, and you're just a whiner, and a complainer. And so the oppressor will oppress you more.
When they see that this is all you can do, right, you know, the, the concept of, you know, Speak softly and carry a big stick. people that speak loud, like, you know, people, he has bark, he doesn't have bite, that sort of thing. It is very telling, it is very telling that you're not very weak, and so it actually emboldens the oppressor. Also, victimhood, even for a just cause, can sometimes come back and haunt you in the sense that you start believing in your subconscious mind that you actually are just beat up. And so there's a big difference. I can't explain this much. But with the with a little bit of time, there's a big difference between passive strength, right? And
victimhood, right, embracing the victim role.
There are people that finesse this, they believe deep down inside, that they're strong, they just need to maneuver a certain way.
But the way to do that is to work around obstacles with their passive strength, and to not show their weakness. You know, like someone who threatened to never act on the threat basically, right? Well, don't threaten, if you can't act on your threat can steal your weakness. And that is a form of strength. And so you know, you're strong, so long as you play in this arena.
And don't misuse the sisters if you're listening. But that is one of the greatest tools that wise women get what they want from their husbands
by using their passive strength, right? Like, you see him like a train coming at you. Sure, you may want to try to pull off a Superman and meet train with trains, but it usually doesn't end well. It usually doesn't end well. And honestly, people understand this people that don't do the same thing over and over again, you know, and expect different results. But if you say, I'm the, I don't know his name, the rail guy, I control the train, how do I control the train like the Aikido guy that controls the attacker, I shift the rails I he wants to come this way I sent him that he wants to come this way, I send them that way. So that would be a hell form of scheming so long as it's used
towards hell ends. But I'll stop there so that the brothers Don't shoot me for, for giving up the secrets. But that's how you get your husband has a ring on your finger. And there are tricks that if I remember,
I'll share with the brothers on how to do it on the opposite end. May Allah make us both humble spouses that are rings on each other's fingers and cooperate and don't butt heads until we get to a place when I level remove both of our flaws
in the abode of His mercy alimony. So I'll stop there. So panic alone. In our head and stuff we're going to Lake or Salalah Nevada, kind of you know how my daughter adios