Ramadan Reminder #22

salatu salam ala Elijah,

Muhammad Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam doesn't even consider and consider

my brothers and sisters.

hamdulillah is the light Allah, one of the benefits of Ramadan is the Baraka we get in time,

because in northern, just the fact that we don't have to eat,

you know,

24 hours, I mean, trim three meals, not 24 hours, because

it saves a lot of time. So we have a lot of time to reflect. And I think this is something I would like to promote and to speak to you about, which is we must increase the amount of time that we spent in reflection and introspection. Now what I would request you to do is two things. Firstly, reflection must be done as a serious proper exercise, which is to sit quietly, without any disturbance, obviously, it means no telephones, no nothing. No, and nobody in the family disturbing you, each family member sit in one place one corner, in one room, or part of a room and think about your life. Now, this is not just random thinking, keep a paper and pencil with you. It's very

important to have to take notes, sit there and reflect on your life. And before you begin the reflection, think about or divide your life into into several, you know, chapters or parts and say what is my spiritual life like?

So what do I where am I with respect to my connection with Allah, I try to be as realistic as possible. I'm not saying, you know, don't start from the point of saying, Oh, I am nothing and you are nothing. I am nothing. I know that. But the point is, whatever you do, say a humbler. I'm praying five times for Salah. And when the massages are open, I used to pray in the masjid at least one of those Salawat hamdulillah. That's good. Now, what more do I need to do? So in terms of reflection, think about it. Similarly, you say in terms of my family life, right? My relationships, my relationship with my spouse, my relationship with my children? What in that? Do I need to work on

what in that needs to be

to be, you know, rectified, strengthened, and so on so forth? So that's another aspect. So you might say, Well, you know, I might my work my job, for example, my career, what do I need to do in terms of my career? What career enhancement tools and tricks and things that I can that I can do you know, how can I help myself and others, what kind of skill enhancement that I need to do for myself. So think about all of these things right. So sit and reflect. Now, broadly speaking, as being human beings, we are oriented towards two things, we are oriented, one is fulfilling of desires, and the other one is coping with fears. It is these two that seem to fuel all human endeavor. in any field,

we work either to achieve our desires, or to deal with our fears. Take career choice, take marriages take raising children, academics, research, exploration of the world and space, medical, science, anything. Everything seems to fit this formula, which is we seek to fulfill our desires, or we seek protection from the things that we fear. Nothing wrong. Of course, with either of these, it is natural, and logical, and can be hugely motivating and inspiring, depending on what that desire or fear is. On the other hand, as we also know, this is the source of many negative things like greed and destructive competition and infighting and discord and shortsightedness, it's a core cause of a

lot of stress, it's a cause of a lot of depression. It's a cause of, you know, broken hearts and broken relationships. All of these also come out of these two things, which is the following desires and running away from or seeking protection from fears.

And that's why we hear so many calls. For example, to simplify our lives. Some people say become minimalist in our material possessions, he will say stop competing. Even go and live off grid go and stay in a you know, in a log cabin in the middle of the forest or something. None of these seem to get to gain much traction and they're still in the realm of interesting thoughts. So we see a video here we read a book somewhere. We hear a lecture somewhere and that's it. I mean, how many people do you know who listen to this lecture about living off grid actually

Pick up a bag and go and live in the woods. I don't know anyway. So it is, this is where it is, like confusion galore. Now add to this the confusion that arises when one needs to choose between a desire and have an affair. For example, your child wants to be an artist that is her desire. Why do you as a parent, force her to study engineering? Because you say What are you so are what can an artist earn. So her desire is sacrificed at the altar of your fear, I've seen may actually be more such instances than I care to remember, parents forcing their children into fields that they have no interest in.

And where they because of the, you know, because they succumb to their fears about the future material success of the child. The intention of the parent is obviously good, no doubt, but it ends up in a joyless life for the child. Fortunate are those who rebel and choose to follow their hearts. But those are few and far between. and judge rebellion comes with its own costs, which of course, are highly avoidable if you can do that. Now, in my own career, as a corporate consultant, and leadership trader, life coach and a mentor for so many people, I've seen hundreds of people who remain in jobs that are dead, and they find no inspiration, they find no meaning, they find no joy

in that job, yet they stay there because they're afraid of what they think will happen if they leave their job as them. How do you know that something bad will happen? How do you know what we have? What's this fear? Have you ever tried, then the answer is no. I never tried it. But I'm too afraid to try. Now, that's a dead end, right? That's

the same thing happens in marriages, where people prefer to suffer the pain of the known because they fear the unknown. And so people are in abusive relationships. People are in marriages, which are absolutely, you know that that debt, there is nothing between the two people is like two people living in a hotel.

In some cases, the hotel would have been better because at least you have nothing to the other person. But here it is you sharing the bedroom, but there is a dining room with them. And there's constant friction and constant

conflict. And as I told you, in some cases, you know, abusive marriages, for example, right now, in this whole doctor thing, we are saying that this is good for the families, but in cases where there are abusive marriages, where the there is domestic violence, this is a curse, because now the the the abuser, the violent spouse is not there in the household time, to at least in when when he or she used to work part of the time they'll go, but now they're in the house all the time. And believe me, it's not only the men, abusive marriages, the women are also abusers, and the women are also aggressive. So are the men. Some are physically aggressive, some are emotionally aggressive, and

that emotional aggression is as painful and as damaging, or perhaps more damaging than the physical aggression. May Allah save us from all that. And that's why, though there are many who made lots of money, writing books and

speaking at conferences, telling people not to follow their hearts, ask yourself, How many have you seen, taking that advice? Ask yourself, whether you are following your heart. Believe me, there's nothing more beautiful than following your heart. And I'm really I have done it all my life. The only couple of times when I didn't do that I was visible as sensible enough and I had the guts to leave what I was doing, get out. So I could then continue to follow my heart and I can tell you, but the problem is, there is I can tell you till the cows come home, but you are gonna do that, unless and until you believe that and unless and until you take that risk. So it's not a matter of telling

is not a matter of talking, it's a matter of actually physically doing that physically taking the risk to follow your heart. You know many philosophies tell us to become free from desire. Now, I want to talk about the logical impossibility of the desire to be free from desire, the desire to be desire free, because that desire itself is a desire. However, the question remains, what is the problem with having positive desires, like for example, career ambition, like for example, the desire for a great marriage, like for example, the desire for for for great children, good children, the desire for friends and influence, the desire to do good the result when people and so on and so

forth. Oh, nothing wrong with that. So what must one do? The point of focus. Focus, therefore, is not so much the absence of desire, but to choose which desire

I must have, right? The same logic. Let's look at the other side, which is the issue of fears. The same logic applies to fears. We all fear loss being the loss of freedom, loss of wealth, loss of health, loss of significance, right now, here, everyone is living in terror from the COVID virus, everybody's fearing that you will contract it, you will die. But you know, believe me, I personally know a couple of friends of mine in the UK, husband wife, who both had COVID and now they're recovering 100. And they're fine. I know, two other people secondhand. We I don't know them personally, but they are cousins or a friend of mine in New York, who both got COVID and who both

completely recovered. So it's not as if it is not that sentence, if you get it is not that you will die or you must die. No. But we are living in the sphere. We live we live in the fear of loss of significance, right, especially when you get when you retire when you get older. When you become elderly, the biggest thing that you know, which is a very debilitating thing, is the loss of significance, especially in nuclear culture, nuclear families, where the old people are really rejected. I mean, there there is no, in our culture in the Muslim culture.

And especially in the eastern

Eastern countries,

there is a significance for older people, there is a respect for a white beard, there's a respect for for age, it's a it's a terrible tragedy, and so completely insane that the whole issue of retirement, for example is it as soon as a person is 60 years old, 55 years old, 65 years old, whatever the retirement age, you send them all we imagine here the person who's accumulated knowledge throughout his life, and at the time and he is likely to be of the of the greatest benefit for the organization for society, you shut them out to throw them away. Now, this is completely logical. I tell people create a pool of people who are retired, pay them a stipend, good for them

apart from their from their pension, pay them a stipend, keep them on call and let them contribute by all means, taking them out of the line of management, because you want people the younger people you want them to have avenues for for growth and for for promotions, but do not deprive the organization from the accumulated wisdom of five, six decades of lifetime. Similarly in the home and so on, so forth.

The grandparents especially, or elderly parents, they completely they lose significance, and they just become you know, glorified babysitters, which is so tragic use that you use them, positively respect them, love them, you know,

treasure them value them, because they are the repositories of knowledge, they are the repositories of tradition, they are the repositories of culture, they are the repositories of of language. I mean, I remember my grandparents was so much affection of decades after they have died, because they were very significant in our family in our lives. Nobody shut them aside. But today, the world is different. So very important for us to bring back these things, the fear of loss of loss of prestige, the fear, loss of friends, with your bereavement, with your authority, all of these fears. Now, once again, there is a positive aspect to fear which keeps us alive and alert and on our toes.

And willing to do more than what we would normally have been willing to do. And all of this to protect ourselves from the loss that we fear. Now, very important also not to say that this is one of the greatest manipulating tools that

that dictatorships use that totalitarian

governments use, which is that through injecting a fear in the population, they get the population to agree to greater surveillance, greater control, and fewer and fewer freedoms. In under normal circumstances. People would never agree to those things, but when they have been given the fear of death, the fear of you know, some major disease or something, people will agree to things that they would not normally agree to just see right now you're sitting at home, two weeks, three weeks, in some cases, four weeks, shut down the house, lots of pain and loss of work. But who's complaining nobody, right? Everybody's not people are not complaining. People are are whether they're happy or

not in the traditional sense, they are happy to sit at home because they feel the Coronavirus if this Coronavirus, fear was not there. There is no way that any government would have been able to keep people in their homes. Similarly as far as tracking is concerned, service is concerned. You know in the name of health care, all of this comes in but

Later on, ask whether this would just go away? I don't know.

So a life without fear is as impossible as a life without desire. So what must What must you do? My solution is to substitute all desires with one desire and all fears with one fear. And that is why I titled this reminder, one wish, one fear, one desire, one fear, question is which desire which fear, very simple, the desire to win the pleasure of Allah and the fear of incurring the displeasure of Allah. We are in the middle of our Ron came for this, rather than came to give us one desire, one fear and that is called taqwa. The essence of taqwa is to to the desire to win the pleasure of Allah who I love more than anyone and anything else, and fear of incurring the displeasure and anger of

Allah subhanaw taala, who I love more than anything and anyone else, that was not fear of Allah, but it is the fear of displeasing Allah, who we love over and above anything and everything tests. Now to do this, we need to inculcate this.

We need two things. One is we need an awareness of Allah subhanaw taala in our lives, and gratitude for all that he blessed us with, to be aware of Allah subhanho wa Taala we must reflect on who Allah is, and his glory and His Majesty. Now here is how Allah subhanho wa Taala introduced himself, Allah subhanaw taala Sarah emunah shaytani r rajim Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim Allah Allah Allah who will hire you that was in a two

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reflect on the glory and majesty of Allah. As Allah introduced himself, reflect on the glory and majesty of Allah, in the signs of Allah harmless, look around, see the signs of Allah subhanaw taala and reflect on His Majesty, what are the signs of the glory and majesty of Allah Subhana Allah is the COVID-19 virus, one strand of RNA has

driven the world into a state of submission to the Creator.

Think about that. How powerful is that? Allah did not need to send to Bella Sara, to bring us all down on our knees and our heads on on the ground before one strand of RNA delete. This is the glory and majesty of Allah. We recognize that and we asked Allah subhanaw taala to leave us from this each and

then be grateful.

thankfulness my brother and sisters almost went and I said we're laying ceccato Plaza no one does it the one who is thankful I will increase my blessings for him. When I in Chicago weather in Africa, in Russia de la said but if he's ungrateful, let that person be aware. And let him be be aware, not be aware be aware of my punishment which is very severe. ask Allah to make us all among his thankful slaves inshallah to reflect on the

on the

On the on the blessings of Allah. Allah mentioned many of them in the fora what use your eyes and ears, look at yourself in the mirror, ask Allah subhanaw taala the blessings that he has blessed us with, they are beyond counting what Allah said

that he said if you want to count my blessings, you will not be able to count. Why in doubt, do an amateur night, lat are so high. And that said, you will not be able to come and blessings even if you want to count. So let us try to count the blessings of homeless man in ourselves, sit and reflect. You're doing all of this while you reflect, reflect, write down the names of some of those blessings because all those blessings will have names. Your parents, your teachers, your spouse, your children, your husband, your your your, your relatives, your friends, right. Sangha knows your faculties that Allah has given you.

The head that Allah has given you, while the whole world is is counting dead bodies. hamdulillah you are sitting safe. And you are watching this thing on your television Angela Bella keep you safe. So thank Allah Renata, reflecting on the glory and majesty of unabridged kasyapa line in your heart, thanking Allah subhanaw taala brings the hope and Mahabharat and love for Allah in your heart, the combination of these two things, pleasure to love, and humble law is adequate. Which is why I must run into the same this month of Ramadan, a brother and sisters in addition to this, reflect on and list all the analysis of Hamilton have blessed us with a tank. I love every one of these things in

pseudocode into hatchet, right? Some of them would have listed names, people who are in your life, which Allah put there, and you need to thank them. So go and thank them for being in your life. send them emails for them, go meet them and thank them for contributing to you because they contributed to you they made to our to their shared their life experience with you. They did not have to do that.

They did that to you. They're doing you a favor. Don't take it for granted. Don't take it for granted. Right. Make sure that you pay for that. Whether it is money whether it is in any way. Make sure that you thank people Susana Simpson, Milan, Josh gudinas lamda school de la, the one who was not tagged to people has not tagged

and then align ourselves to the new goal of one

wish and one fear, the desire to win the pleasure of Allah and the fear of incurring his displeasure. Believe me, it simplifies life, for living from living in the fog of conflicts and contradictions that we have made of our lives focused on materialistic goals alone, to the clarity, tranquility and harmony that Islam offers us. So how does it work? As an entrepreneur, you may have questions about the line of business you want to do your source of funds, what you produce for the market, or the market to serve, profit margins, all this, each is a decision point. With a new standard, you only need to ask one question with respect to every one of those questions, does it

please apply? The same for every profession, every hobby, every occupation, every sport, every recreation, every relationship, ask, does it please Allah? We understand how this gets us success in the market. But how is it does it help in this life

are reported rasulillah salam said, When Allah loves a slave, he calls up lisara and says Barry, I love this person. So you also love it. Then jewelley sam loves him. And he makes an announcement in the heavens say Allah loves this person. So you also know him. Thus, the dwellers of the heavens love that person and he or she is honored on the earth. Similarly, I saw some said what Allah subhanaw taala is angry with the slave. He calls up this ROM and says, I dislike this person. So you also dislike him, then given his Salah dislikes that person, and an announcement is made to the heavens do not make the announcement until Allah subhanho wa Taala dislikes his person, so you also

dislike him? Does they hate him and he's hated on the earth. Success in dunya and after

both of them come from pleasing Allah, I remind myself when you that both success and failure come from Allah subhanaw taala I ask Allah subhanaw taala to help us to always please Him, and to never displease him. I asked him to enable us to live a life which is full of higher and better cannot do this work and we'd get some gentlemen we waited. masala Ravi Karim Allah He was savage might be raring to go