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Living Islam – Raising a Muslim Child #10

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Mirza Yawar Baig

Channel: Mirza Yawar Baig

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Mr Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala shuffelin ba Wormwood, saline, Muhammad Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa aalihi wa sahbihi wa sallam to Stephen caphyon cathedra for my brother, my brothers sisters.

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Today, as I talked to you, the war in Ukraine is in its fourth day.

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And I can't help but

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reflect on this. That.

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One, there was a time when Mr. Vladimir Putin was a little boy.

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There was a little time when he was a year old, two years old, three years old.

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And this is true for anyone

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good or evil.

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That there was a time when they were little children.

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And what they became, and what they contributed, good or evil

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was based on what happened to them when they were ill children.

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Today, if you look at society around us,

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and see

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what direction the word is going in.

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All of this boils down to and comes down to what happened with the people who are the decision makers today. What happened to them when they were little children.

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And that's why in our lesson on raising a Muslim child,

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I say to you, and I find myself that with respect to Muslim children, we have a special responsibility

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to ensure that they grow up to be positive, contributing members of society,

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conscious of their accountability to Allah subhanaw taala, from whom nothing can be hidden.

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And giving the world the best possible

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degree can give.

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And this is the responsibility of the adults.

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The world the way it is today, whether you like it or not,

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is the result of the decisions of adults.

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Children don't make the world the children today, they have not made the world they don't take the decisions.

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Whether it's small children, whether it is older children, in schools, colleges, they don't have the decisions, the decisions are taken by their parents and their grandparents, these are the that is the generation is one generation up, sometimes two,

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which is taking the decisions that are shaping

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society in this world. As I speak to you along as best what's going to happen,

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whether there is going to be a nuclear war. And if there is a nuclear war, what will be the effect of that

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learn as best we all we can do and we should do is to make a lot of make a lot of stuff far make a lot of repentance manaton and seek forgiveness from Allah Samaritan, and make a lot of the offer higher for a blessing for safety. And for relief from oppressors of all kinds, and relief for all of those who are being oppressed.

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last class I talked about being a rat, the problem with the rat race. And I told you that when this friend of mine asked me, What's the solution? I said be a cat.

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And then I thought about what does it mean by saying being be a cat?

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What are the characteristics of a cat?

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Again, all analogies like this, they have a logical ending. So don't take it, literally.

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Apply it yourself and say where do where am I with respect to the qualities that I'm talking about?

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And don't say whether you know which cat has this is not about cats is about you and me.

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Sitting here now let us look at what does it be mean to be like a cat, a cat is focused primarily on himself.

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But unlike the rat, the cat focuses on developing its skill as a hunter.

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Cats Don't hoard.

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So every day is a new opportunity to hunt.

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To improve skills to learn from previous mistakes, to take risk, and to pit one's own strengths and talents against external forces.

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If Gods are out If cats are not successful in the hunt, this deep hungry

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hunger is a great driver.

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Cats teach the hunting skills to their children.

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And groupmates

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because survival of the whole bride, talking about lions, for example, depends on the skills of everyone.

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Cats don't live in a fixed place. And they cover huge ranges in order to find prey.

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So this desert develop perspective,

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they learn to create strategies for successful hunt.

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Cats know that their own survival depends on the well being of the entire pride. And so they take care of one another.

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For the cat, the focus, self development and collaboration

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arising out of this, I identified some key characteristics, which I believe if a person develops, he or she will become entrepreneurial in nature, and will become a winner in all ways.

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Let me describe them for you.

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Because this is a lifelong journey,

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a life spent in learning and being delighted by that.

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And that's why I said, cats don't die, they turn into mist that rises from the forest at dawn.

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Now, the model that I want to share with you is

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this module, which I

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hope will be is part of this lecture,

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which looks like this.

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I hope you can read that, but doesn't matter. I'm going to talk about it.

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The fundamental the foundation,

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of this

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model, is fit

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is even villa is thoughtful Allah.

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Faith is a small word that has a big meaning.

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It can mean different things to different people. So let me define what I mean by faith.

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Faith in my view, is a dynamic process that is based on the individual's understanding of himself or herself in the context of physical, intellectual, psychological and spiritual strength.

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That is why self awareness, and emotional understanding is very important.

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Based on this, he or she takes risk and has success, which reinforces the fifth

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where there is failure, they analyze it and create a new strategy. And then and that also influences and reinforces the fifth. Otherwise faith can be shaken, sometimes with failures, failure, the shore knowledge that one will succeed in one's endeavor.

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To do all that is required, make the maximum effort and then to trust that the result will be favorable.

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This may sound irrational, but it's very critical element of the combination.

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So it's supernatural irrational, not not irrational.

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It's the final ingredient in the mix that produces success. Faith is the final ingredient, which produces success without faith, you reach the end of your strength, and you find nothing to sustain you across the leap, the leap of faith.

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I like to use the words of Barbara winters to describe fifth. She said when you come to the end of the light of all that you know

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and about to step off into the darkness of the unknown. Faith is knowing that one of two things will happen. There will be something firm to stand on. Or you will be taught how to fly.

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Faith is knowing with complete certainty that Allah subhanaw taala will do what He promised in the Quran.

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And what did you promise? He said Well, my yet the villa Allahumma Harada. We're here to go whoa, Minh Hazel ly

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Omonia Tawakkol Allah He was the data delegate who said insalata luck. For the one who has consciousness of Allah, Who Fears displeasure has Taqwa for the one who has stuff what? Allah will extract him from all his difficulties

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and will provide him from sources that he could not imagine.

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For the one who has faith in Allah subhanaw taala verily He, Allah subhanaw taala will become sufficient for that person.

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This is a promise of Allah.

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As the faithful as those who are fit, we need to ask ourselves this question. Do I really

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Last Ramadan

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it is this fit that gives courage, the courage to take the unpopular stance, to speak the truth before the tyrant, to stand up for the oppressed, to do what needs to be done, no matter how difficult

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to follow your dream. It is this faith that lights the path

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on the long dark road, in the late reaches of the night, when all about you are asleep, and you are sitting wondering if the road that you've chosen to walk is really worth it or not.

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When human awareness and resistance to adversity is at its lowest faith is a small, clear voice in your heart, which tells you that what you are doing is right, and gives you the courage to carry on.

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Faith is the foundation of courage

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and courage enables risk taking. When when when you operate from with courage, taking risk becomes possible. Courage is not what you have before you start. It is what comes when you take the first step.

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When you first stand up, your heart is fluttering, your knees are weak, and your throat is dry. But as you stand up, and all eyes turn to you, a cool breeze blows. And you'll suddenly find steel inserted into your spine.

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You stand taller, your senses are enhanced. Your eyes are bright. And the voice that comes out of your throat is firm and confident. It's not shaking. It is as if you are standing to one side, listening to yourself speaking words that you did not know you had in you, explaining things that were themselves unclear to you until then.

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Yet when you start to speak your mind that only that not only two concepts become clearer, but that you are able to explain them with examples that take people's breath away in that moment of aha, that comes not too often, but is remembered for all time, when it has come

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what you had thought of as risky, until then, seems easy, and willing, inevitable.

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And all that you are aware of is the excitement of it or

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excitement

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is fear. That anticipates a good ending.

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Exactly lots of fear. But it's a fear that anticipates a good ending. So therefore, when you're excited to do something.

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Risk taking creates excitement.

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Excitement is the adrenaline flow, no doubt. But more important. It is the door that opens onto the vista of new possibilities of things unspoken and only dreamt off until then, of concepts still in the shadows on the far boundary of knowledge, or what maybe what can become.

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Imagine that you just reached the top of a steep mountain pass.

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It was a long hard climb, at times even dangerous but you made it and now we'll step into the bass towards the gap in the rock

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that is like a doorway.

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As you enter the door, you come to the lip of the escarpment that overlooks a valley spread out below your feet.

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undulating grassland in some blue, suggesting a stream flowing into a lake in the far distance. clubs have thick shade trees, the distant California packets and other birds

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flying around from tree to tree eating.

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From the tree and eating well.

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The mist rising in the early morning from the forest floor.

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Myriad smells and sights and sounds. A cool breeze comes up to read you and invite you to step forward. taking the first step on the path leading to what new discoveries not toilet.

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I will leave you to imagine that just

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fill it with images you want

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experienced the shortness of breath, the sparkling of your eyes, the warmth of the early morning,

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sun on your face and the hint of coming red.

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Not that

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That spells cold and damp. But the life giving rain than the dry earth prays for and waits every day.

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This is the excitement that creates energy and commitment and drive for excitement, after all, is also fear, but which anticipates a happy ending.

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Excitement drives Passion,

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Passion soars on the wings of excitement.

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When a person works with passion, all the forces of nature collaborate, to make him succeed.

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much can be done with little, which is what we got Baraka all the numbers add up correctly, time slows down to let him finish the dusk. The den comes on time, the taxi man who does to him the things that he fought in the cab when he got off.

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Passion invokes Passion,

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passion, invites Passion, Passion ignites passion, others will come into contact with a person who works with passion, they get energized, suddenly, they start to see meaning in what they do.

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Until then, they had been doing it mechanically.

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He will work with passionate people report, an enhanced sense of satisfaction and a clip and accomplishment. They look forward to each day, to be with their leader and to do what pleases Him.

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I believe most firmly that one must identify what one is passionate about and develop expertise in it. Then, when one does that work, there is no stress. For one is doing what one loves. It is a natural that if you love something, and learn to do it, to do it well.

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There's a clear difference between the work of someone who's merely doing a job. And another one who's answering according

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for one is earning a living and best for the other is the fulfillment of his life's purpose.

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It's answering a covenant.

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Imagine a life that is led every day of where every day of that life is a joy to live. That is what being passionate bestows on you.

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A passion drives excellence, because it is but natural that someone who's passionate about something will want to do it in the best possible manner.

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And what is that excellence all about? to continuously search for a better way, a more profitable, compassionate, beautiful or exciting way to accomplish the goal is excellence that makes you do that which the world may consider strange.

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Excellence is to care more than others think is wise. to risk more than others think it's safe.

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To dream more than other things is practical. And to expect from yourself more than others think is possible. It is only in the search for excellence that new discoveries are made. And better ways are found.

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It's not competing against others, but arrays to achieve one's own potential by pushing the boundaries of one's own knowledge and capability and power and influence. striving for excellence generates respect and attracts followers and enhances one's influence.

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Excellence creates brand

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and in the end result of all this virus, all this virtual spiral of watches.

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of virtual circle is differentiation.

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Why differentiate? Because differentiate creates brand. Brand creates Loyalty. Loyalty creates influence and it is the foundation of leadership.

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Brand creates identity. It enables the leader, the leader to stand out and not blend in with the crowd. It makes it makes him or her the standard bearer to who standard, the others rally.

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It makes him the light in the darkness with those who who are lost sick

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and need to find the way once again.

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Positive differentiation creates customers who are loyal and will choose you over your competitors.

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Producers of products and services strive to differentiate from their competition in ways that are desirable to their customers.

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In which address a particular key need of the clients so that the client will choose the product or service over that of their competitors.

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The same logic applies in human development. The drive excellence enables the person to create that positive differentiation, which makes him or her a brand in himself.

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And that's what is the essence of being a cat, to be the best that you can be, without worrying about what the other one is doing.

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You still do the best that you can do, even if nobody is looking, because it is not about them. It is about you.

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When we behave with grace, and nobility, and compassion, and wisdom and honor,

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you're not doing it because of others.

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You're doing it because of ourselves. That is how you see yourself.

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You do it because your behavior defines you. And it arises from your beliefs and values. You do. So you get so you are you do. So you get. So you are. And that is what your legacy is, to live the message. That success is to do the best that you can do. Because only that is worthy of you.

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It's very important, my mother and sisters, for us to

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keep this in mind and to ensure

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that we live a life which is meaningful.

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To live a life which is meaningful, we have to live a life which is thoughtful,

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a life of hafla, a life of thoughtlessness life is only about

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enjoyment.

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In one way or the other.

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It goes from thrill to thrill to thrill.

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This is the live animals.

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This is the life of animals. It's not human life. As human being we have to

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look at what is the outcome of my life.

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This message must be taken out to the to children

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from the earliest time

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in my consulting practice of

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working with

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with family businesses.

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Occasionally,

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I come across a family business which is literally tearing itself apart. Because the brothers were involved, the siblings were involved in some ways the sisters

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nobody can see eye to eye. And each one wants their piece to literally the business that was built by the previous generation by the Father grandfather is being digitally torn apart. It's like a pizza which is being cut, and pieces are going away.

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The question to ask is why? Why does that happen?

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Why do brothers people who share the same genes who same to set share the same blood?

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Why do they become enemies of each other?

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And the answer is that they said that this does not happen suddenly, this is the outcome of how they were raised. One of the most common things I'm sure all of us have seen

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is in the nursery, you have these two little boys

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who are fighting over a toy. And the father of the mother comes and says or don't fight. I will get you your own.

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He says to the one who's losing, I will get you your own.

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Contrast this with our other parent who comes and says look,

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you must share this and both of you must play with the same toy. If not, I'm going to take it away.

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Right enforce collaboration

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which we'll see more of. So that is why when I find one of my

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if anybody asked me a question about why this

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well rang, good businesses being torn apart, because two brothers can't see eye to eye. I say to them, go back

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to the nursery days and look and see what you see there.

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At age two, it's a dinky toy

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at age 40.

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It is the company is the organization.

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Same thing applies to all the different

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values that we give to the children. What is the value of truthfulness?

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I know we all talk about this if it's oh it should be very truthful never tell lies on so on. And then one day what happens?

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The child is about to go to school

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and you get a false medical certificate.

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And give it to the gentleman says, Take this and give it to your teacher tomorrow.

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The child knows the certificate is a lie, he knows he is lying, you know the mother lying father lying.

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But because this lie happens to be convenient.

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We not only allow it but we teach the child returns that light.

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So what is the child learning now? Is he or is he or she learning the importance of truthfulness? Or are they important? are they learning the importance of lying when we need to lie?

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Which one

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I can tell you any number of such examples in devil village to kindness to compassion to to responsibility

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to accountability.

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Somebody asked me a question, how can I have a good healthy Islamic atmosphere in my house.

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So you can have it in by living like that.

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Children listen with their eyes. They don't care what you say until they see what you do.

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If they see their parents behaving

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in positive ways, that they will learn the benefit of those ways and they will behave in the same way.

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On the other hand of the fee, this is a parent's squabbling and fighting and

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backbiting and slandering, talking about other people

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if they see their parents engaged in ostentatious spending

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and that is what they will love.

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I remember almost probably 25 years ago

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I was invited to

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to eat with a family to eat for dinner for the family.

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And usually whenever I'm invited then you know it's never free. So they always asked me to would you please say something to give us a reminder us and Marcia, Allah bless them hamdulillah

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nothing wrong with starting with in a car of the

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so it is on this day when I went to that house. I was sitting in the dry room and they were getting

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ready for the session for my session so somebody had gone to get a mic and this and that.

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When one of the boys in that family he couldn't have been more than 15 years old at the time.

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He came in quietly in my ear he tells me he our uncle

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tell my

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tell these people meaning and those people who these people were one of them was his father and the others were his uncle this one. He said Tell these people not to misappropriate other people's properties

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we'll do what our

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what our Amari logo will here. The logo is Amina Coco

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don't eat their land to other people.

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Think about this.

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People today they complain a lot of elders they complain Oh children have no respect and they don't show respect.

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what respect is that child going to show for you?

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When the child sees you the reality of who you are that you are a thief You are a liar

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you are a manipulator

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right that's what you are.

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The child is seeing that

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you see your deli ladies cheering you manipulating you seeing you swallowing somebody else's property

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and you seriously believe that this child would respect you

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how are these elders?

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What is that respect about you

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make is that for MIG tau or change your ways.

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And believe me when you own up to respond to a problem and you make effort to change your ways. And as well Tara is very pleased insha Allah forgive you. Allah Allah subhanaw taala puts

00:29:37--> 00:29:38

the value for that

00:29:39--> 00:29:40

in the perception of others.

00:29:42--> 00:29:44

So quite contrary to what you might fear

00:29:46--> 00:29:55

that you will lose authority and credibility actually your credibility will improve will go credible, credibility will become stronger and get built up more.

00:29:57--> 00:29:59

Nobody likes liars. When you own

00:30:00--> 00:30:01

What up, Macedo? I think I did wrong.

00:30:02--> 00:30:10

I should not have done this. And I apologize and I will make amends and I'm not going to do this from now onwards. Believe me, you will be a hero.

00:30:13--> 00:30:17

You're not doing it for that reason we're not asking you to do for that reason. You're doing it to be the last man.

00:30:18--> 00:30:21

But no harm is getting a benefit.

00:30:22--> 00:30:25

You will become a hero in your society.

00:30:27--> 00:30:31

One of the sisters and one of myself knew there's only one thing that we need to remember.

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Only one thing what is it? That one day you will die

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to sit in front of the mirror or stand in front of a mirror

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and tell yourself by Definity subzi you will die

00:30:47--> 00:30:48

you will die

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and you will be resurrected wireless monitor and you will answer

00:30:57--> 00:31:04

that time at that time none of the smart relic answers that you create for yourself will work

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because with the listener that the answer will come out from your heart

00:31:11--> 00:31:16

so don't put stuff inside if you don't want to brought in meat

00:31:18--> 00:31:19

that's gonna

00:31:20--> 00:31:26

be pleased with us never to displease. Was Allah Allah be very while he was I remember I forgot who was lamare