Living Islam – Raising a Muslim Child #07
Channel: Mirza Yawar Baig
File Size: 28.32MB
salam ala Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala shuffelin ba when mousseline Muhammad Rasulullah, sallallahu alayhi, WA he was Abu salah, doesn't even Kofi Annan cathedra from Abbado, my brothers and sisters in our class on raising a Muslim child. I mentioned this right in the beginning. And I mentioned it again and I will mention it again. And that is that there has to be and there must be a distinctive difference between how a Muslim child is raised, raised, and how any other child is raised. And that is because Muslims have been sent into this world for a specific purpose. And that purpose is to introduce Allah subhanaw taala, to the rest of the world, all of
humankind was created for the same purpose. And that purpose is to worship Allah subhanho wa Taala alone, because only Allah subhanho wa Taala is worthy of worship.
Now, if you,
if you if you understand is that all of humankind, every single human being ever created, every single gene who was ever created, was created only for this purpose, because Allah subhanaw taala told us this, this is not my understanding, this is what Allah has said, Allah has said, and others are yet Wamba Philip tajinder valenza Ilaria boo, I have not created the gene and the insulin and the human beings for anything other than my worship.
So the purpose of creation of every gene and every human being is only and only to worship Allah subhanaw taala.
Now, out of those general human beings, the Muslims are those who have accepted this, who have taken this, who have accepted this, to say that we will worship only Allah and nobody else. And these are the Muslims. And therefore, the way a Muslim child is raised must be different from the way the child of someone who has not accepted this is raised.
And therefore, the Muslim child was raised with an awareness and understanding of who Allah subhanaw taala is, of who Rasulullah saw salamis, and of what our purpose in this life is, and our purpose is to worship Allah subhanaw taala alone, and to take this message to every other
person on the face of the earth, that is our message. That is our purpose. And therefore, they cannot learn, we cannot teach them unless we are connected. We cannot teach them to worship Allah, if we are not worshiping Allah, we cannot teach them to introduce Allah to others, when we don't know who Allah is,
we cannot introduce someone we don't know the basic requirement to be able to introduce somebody is that you should know that individual, even if it is very,
very transitory, or, or very, you know, surface on the surface. It happens sometimes when you go when I when I speak, and international functions and so on international conferences, the the Master of Ceremonies may not be somebody who knows me very well. But what they do is they go to the internet, they take my CV from there, or they find out something and they collect some information, and then they introduced me and when they introduced me, you might, you know me might be deceived into believing that this person is my closest and greatest friend, because they know all of this stuff, but all that they learn 10 minutes before that in an introduction, but the point being that
you cannot introduce somebody you don't know. So how can I introduce Allah? subhanaw taala? If I don't know unless,
and knowing and knowing about two different things I may know about Joe Biden, for example, the President of the United States, I may know about Narendra Modi, the Prime Minister of India,
but I don't know either of them. Right? I know about them, but I don't know either of them to a knowing somebody means that you know that individual
at a personal level. And I mean to put it very simply, will they answer your call? Will they take your call if I call that person will they pick up bye for
now dollar loan on sight loss that is beyond any examples and so forth. So we're not I'm not giving that as an example of Allah. My point is, and of course Allah subhana wa listens to everything, everyone, everyone's dog, but naturally Allah listens to the desires of those who love Him, and those who know him and those who obey Him more than he listens to the rise of those who not.
So, the therapy of children begins with our own therapy. There is no therapy of children
which can be done by parents who do not have therapy themselves.
This is one of the great fallacies and the and one of the great tragedies in the way Muslim children are brought up, which is that we hand over the tarbiyah that the the the training
The, the molding of character of our children to strangers. I've got nothing against strangers. But I'm saying you as parents have a special responsibility.
And nobody can take your place. Nobody
knows nobody can take your bliss.
Children have many friends, children have many teachers, they will have many teachers, but they have only two parents, the mother and the father, nobody can take their place. Allah subhanaw taala did not give the special position to the mother and the father.
Just because biologically they were the agents through which Allah subhanaw taala created that child know,
that position is given because of the training and the thermia that the mother and the father given are supposed to give to the children. So handing over that to a school to a mother's or to a mucked up to a teacher, is to shirk your own responsibilities, no matter what grade reason you have. And you know, I'm not saying the people who are who are not directly involved with training and teaching their own children are necessarily doing something haram. No.
They may be even, they may be doing something very, very, very good and valuable. But if you are a parent, you are number one responsibility for which you will be held accountable is the welfare and the teaching and the training and the thermia of your child.
So it doesn't matter what you were doing.
The tarbiyah of your children
Many people for example, criticize people, brothers and sisters go in Jamaat and they say you go off in Jamaat for months, one year whatnot, and there is no one to take care of you know what to do 30 of your children
and if the person says no, no Medusa I went in Nevada my wife was there and I and the children are going to an Islamic school. No.
You are you personally. Mr. warm body and Mrs. warm body mother and father, you are responsible for the training and therapy of your children personally, so do it. Real soon, as I said, I've said this a million times and I'll say it a million times most as soon as Allison did not run schools. He did not run mcnabb's. He did not run Sunday school. They did not run. Mother says he did not run Islamic schools.
He taught the adults
the children who used to be around the borders on insulin. Abdullah bonobos are they allow Anwar was his cousin.
And most of the time he lived in his house. I live in Italian was his cousin Babylon. And he lived in his house.
They had been hadiza was given to him as a slave. He freed him and he made him is he called him his own son and he lived in his house
and has been Malik Rhodiola Juana McBain was handed over to his Salah when he came to Medina by the mother of asthma Malik.
And he was the servant of sources.
These children were that they were not his students, students as in enrolling in a class. They happen to be around it. And of course they learned and their contribution is enormous. I'm not talking about that. I'm just saying that the people received as a result of directly addressed and spoke to were the parents of children.
And those parents taught those children.
Why did he do that?
He did that because it is the primary responsibility primary responsibility of parents who teach him number one. Number two when the parent teaches the child especially Islamic knowledge, especially teaching a child to read the Quran, especially teaching a child Islamic Islamic knowledge. It builds a special bond between the mother and the child the father and the child which cannot be built in any other way.
If your child is learning Quran from an outside teacher, nothing wrong with the teacher. The teacher may be the greatest chef in the world. But it's not the child's father is not the child the mother.
The child may learn to read the Quran perfectly, absolutely beautiful, fantastic that you read the Quran and whatnot. It is not the same as learning it from you. And if you are the father or the mother do not know how to read Quran properly learn.
Who told you that it's okay for you not to be able to read the Quran properly learn it doesn't matter what age
I am taking lessons at my age.
I'm 66 years old. I am taking lessons in the Quran of the Quran. In the in the in the in the in the in the
addition of the Quran
from our dear brother and half his chair Abdullah Al healthy from Morocco. Who, who comes here for Ravi? To this place? I take three classes per week from him every week.
Why do I need to do that?
Because this is our responsibility.
It is our responsibility to learn and to teach. And the primary responsibility
to teach children is under parents and I don't do I don't care what you do.
Just justify it yourself if you want.
Because Allah subhanaw taala is the ones who will ask you not me.
you cannot outsource the therapy of children to others.
The others, whether they are teachers, whether they are whether they are, you know, relatives, whoever schools, whatnot. These can be your aides
who will also help you
but primary responsibility is yours and will remain with you. No matter how many Islamic schools or how many shoe your child goes to
wherever the responsibility is yours. See how the record reads have a history of yours for yourself. See how the mother of Imam Malik Muhammad Ali wants us to do with it
what did she say to him
there'll be a begins at home there is no other place.
So please understand this.
You as a parent must know Allah. Because unless you know Allah, you cannot introduce Allah subhanaw taala to children.
Your children must know Allah because their job and your job is to introduce Allah subhanho wa Taala to the rest of the world.
I wish you all the very best and ask us Ratan Tata to help you.
And those of you who are who have gone into this, this thing of outsourcing, training and teaching of children please make us different.
And do your job.
Be responsible act responsibly.
Muslim children must learn that Islam is not simply a set of rules and rituals of worship. But that it's a complete way of life where duties to people and mentioned along with the duties to Allah subhanaw taala, hula and hopefully but equally important, is not one at the expense of the other.
There must be taught how worship adds value in this life.
To well to obey Allah subhanaw taala and to worship Allah subhanaw taala adds value in this life itself.
There was understand that worship gives them a competitive advantage to win in this life. Take for example, somebody who's got a very important presentation coming up. Very important meeting coming up. Literally make or break situation. Maybe you are presenting to a group of venture venture capitalists for your project for which you need finance
Alhamdulillah venture capitalism is a halal way of financing so you are going to be doing this
what does that day
the beginning of that day when you have to make this presentation what does it look like?
If it looks like this, that you work late at night to get the presentation ready. And then you go to sleep and you set the alarm.
And in that process you miss even your salon Fajr for example, but you got to go to the presentation so you set the alarm in time for you to go to the presentation you make a presentation. That's one picture. Another picture is that your Hamdulillah you work very hard.
But you wake up
and you stand before Allah subhanho wa Taala and you say Yara, I have done my best
with your help with your topic. Now please take care of me. And if this thing if there is good in it, then please enable me to get it.
you make the
right you do the dwarf is too hard. It is also the dwarf asking the help of Allah Samantha
and then you go to the masjid and you praise a lot of Azerbaijan
and you make dua again and then you praise Ruff, you pay you praise Salah Tada and in that you pray to work out of Salah, Salah to Hydra and you make dua to Allah subhanaw taala and then you go to do you go to your presentation. This is another picture
I'm not asking which is a better picture from a some just an intellectual angle Zoja. Of course, obviously starting our day with the worshipping Allah, no, no, no, no.
Do you see the effect of that in your presentation?
So why don't I tell you do it this way.
And you will find yourself saying things that you did not even know
which will convert the hearts of the people.
Those things will be put into your mind and your heart and your on your on your tongue at that time,
by the one who knows what's in the hearts of people and what will convince them.
Islam is the most practical way of living life.
Islam is the best and most powerful tool that you can imagine.
But it must be seen like that. And it must be used like that.
There's no good having a magnificent tool, most beautifully designed, when you don't know how to use it.
Or use it in a way which is where the tool is not being used properly, so it doesn't function.
Teach your children. Again, I I have to keep repeating this. But that's there's no there's no alternative to that. The only way we teach our children is by doing it ourselves. Because they listen with their eyes, not with yours. They listen with their eyes, and they don't care what you say until they see what you do.
So they must be taught how worship adds value in this life, and how it gives a competitive advantage.
To win in this life. They must be taught how connecting to Allah subhanaw taala geladeira law gives them an insider advantage, enabling them to infuse Baraka into all that they say and do so that they get maximum results with minimum effort.
That is the essence of leverage.
results result with minimal effort
that you would deliver
and you exert a little bit of pressure a huge load difference
is our in ability to interpret Islam and show how it makes sense today.
That gets our children disconnected from Allah subhanaw taala
that they are disconnected because we are disconnected.
After all, you can only give what you have
to ask, What do I have
and then make the effort to upgrade yourself.
A candle does not light up a room by doing anything to the room.
It lights up the room by igniting itself.
So learn to take for Allah and give to your children. If you cannot even give to your children, how are you going to give to the world
the way to do that is to follow the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu. So
make no mistake,
make absolutely no mistake. If you don't follow the Sunnah of Rasulullah salaam you will get nothing
you will get nothing. Try it for yourself or regretted when you die.
It's your call.
All these things will make the child a walking talking example of the way of Islam.
And we'll differentiate him or her from the rest and make him or her a benchmark and a role model for others.
See what the what is going on India In India now
the little girls who are fighting to wear the hijab
What do you see?
You see a picture of a girl who's being oppressed. I see a picture of amazing courage.
I see a picture of a girl who refuses to get oppressed, who standing up for herself who is asserting her identity as a Muslim.
And who will be a witness for or against others like her.
So all these fashionable so called fashionable ladies who don't want to wear the hijab, Muslim women. Remember it is your action which is making her
Because the world is looking at you and saying Why does she wear hijab when this other one is not very very good either.
Your inability to or your your unwillingness to obey Allah subhanaw taala and wear a hijab
the unwillingness of Muslim when men
To keep a beard as a sign of the Sunnah wa salam, and they shave, and they feel no shame in sharing.
You are making the life of those who want to follow the Sunnah more difficult, and remember there will be a price to pay
on the Day of Judgement Allah subhanaw taala will ask you
those people whose life you made difficult they wanted to, they will still obey, believe me, no matter how difficult their life is, they will obey
Allah subhanaw taala
but you will have to say what you did
fear that day.
Fear that day.
Imagine what the what kind of Islamic
character and what kind of love of Allah and love for us was seldom can be inculcated in the children of of parents, where the father is shaved, I do not use the term clean shave because nothing clean about shaving.
To remove the Sunnah of Rosa Salem is not clean
So, for a father who shaved and a mother who does not wear hijab
what kind of effect of that will be on those children?
My brothers and sisters please understand,
you have no choice in this matter what day you had a child whether you decided to have the child or whether that child happened accidentally I don't get the day your child was born. Automatically you got upgraded into the role of role models.
You have no choice in this matter, you can be a good role model or you can be a bad role model. The child can look at you and say I want to be like my father like my mother or the child Mike we look we look up look at you and say well, this is how I should not be.
So my father is an example of what I should avoid. My mother is an example of what I should avoid.
Because if the father is lying and cheating and deceiving people if the father is is a member of clubs in which haram activities are happening if if a father is going to a racecourse and gambling or going to a casino and gambling, I smoking cigarettes, the sign of people of Janome smoke comes out of their mouths
when you want to have that sign with you when you are living in this world May Allah save you from Jana
the child of a mother who's who does not wear hijab, children or parents who are not particular about the prayers and salah they pray when they when they have time on their feet are there maybe they don't pray at all.
And so on and so on. I mean, I don't want to list the litany of stuff that we do.
What kind of children do you think you're raising?
And if you raise good children, believe me those children will be raised Musala Salah was raised in the in the house of Iran.
But when that child looks at you,
is that child going to respect you?
Is the child connected with Allah subhanaw taala going to respect somebody who deliberately disobeyed Allah if a child connected to personalizar Xlm is going to respect Do you think a child who's connected Rosana, Salah is going to is going to
respect parents who who deliberately disobey and and go against the Sunnah of Rasulullah Salah
This is the reality.
The reality is let us straighten ourselves.
Let us bring obedience to Allah subhanho wa Taala into our hearts into our lives into our action into our speech. And it doesn't matter whether anybody likes it or not believe me.
It does not matter Allah Subhana Allah is not looking at any popularity scores.
Allah does not look at Facebook to see whether you are loved or not loved. Allah looks at your heart and by heart.
Love Allah subhanaw taala express the love of Allah through obedience that is how it's expressed. Love Muhammad Salah Salem Express the love of Muhammad wa sallam through
emulation to Atiba
by following his sunnah
and then see how Allah subhanaw taala will change your life and the lives of your children.
That is the choice we have. What kind of role model do I want to be?
I believe in sisters, the essence of Islam. And the example that Rosa's have left for us is this
That is what the Saba did the sahaba. They are with one la la main they were taught by Mr. Seller. And then somebody asked them about Islam they used to say Kulu missile and become like us
because they were they were Islam personified.
If we did not have a sorceress Islam in front of us, and I said, Well, I want to look at somebody's Salah to see what is the best way in which to do salah, who Salah would I look at at the Salah from okra city from Allah.
Right? Same thing. I mean, you could look at sallahu wa taala. Look at the Sahaba were Islam, personified, walking, talking Islam.
And that is the first duty of the Muslim parent to mold the child in the Islamic way, by demonstrating because there is no other way.
And I told as I keep saying all the time and reminding myself I knew that you can talk to the cows come home, nothing is going to change.
Nothing will change until we change ourselves
And that's what was what was the result? Did
I brothers sisters, it is a hands on activity. It's a contact sport.
It's not an armchair travelogue that you're writing.
Producing children is natural. Parenting is not
parenting, like driving has to be learned.
But unlike driving, unfortunately, you don't need a license to do it.
More than 84 we see the results of unlicensed parenting all around the world, and we suffer from it.
But that doesn't mean that you should also do it.
So please learn to become good parents. Because parenting is not about children. Parenting is about parents. You're not saying children, we are saying parenting. Parenting is about parents. Children are the beneficiaries are the victims of parenting, good or bad.
And as I said your call once again.
Your call once again.
Whether to become good parents, or to be bad parents is up to us.
And remember, nobody says I want to be a bad parent. Right? I mean, they obviously this is not it's a given the Nobody says that I want to be a bad parent. But as I said, we see the effect of bad parenting all around us.
Brothers Sisters, I say to you and I remind myself, the only Islam you need to save is the one in your heart.
Allah Allah does not need Islam. Islam is not a religion, Islam is the name of a practice. It's a way of life which is sent down to make human species better versions of themselves.
So don't worry about Islam in the world. Worry about Islam within, within my heart, within my life, within my on my tongue, on my actions, in my home in my business.
If I do that, and I upgrade my own self, then the world automatically gets better, gets better. Because Islam is not a face.
It's the positive conduct,
more positive conduct, more positivity in the world.
Because Islam was sent to make humans better.
Let us understand this. And let us bring this into our lives.
Allah subhanaw taala Zen Islam as something to practice, not something to write a PhD thesis about.
Allah subhanaw taala sent Islam something for us to practice as something to practice. So that we become better so that we become more and more connected to Allah subhanaw taala. So that our speech and our o'clock and our living and our walking and our talking and our day, all become Noorani they all become illuminated with the knower of Allah subhanho wa Taala is obedience.
And that is why last Marathas simply did not send a theory idioms and a just a book. He sent his NaVi SallAllahu Sallam to demonstrate that
that's why we have the beautiful hair. This is the Lana where she said
that WHO IS LM is the walking Koran.
Somebody went to her and said please tell us
about the life of Salah. She said Don't you read the Quran? He said yes.
He said he was the walking Quran.
That is our aspirational goal. I don't say that I become like I will become like that ever or you will become like that Allah may Allah give you, help you and strengthen you
make you like that. But that is our aspirational goal that is what we are aiming for.
So let's try that.
Let us raise children
in the love of Allah and the love of resources, obedient to Allah subhanaw taala and following the Sunnah of Muhammad Rasul Allah salah, and then see how they shine in this world and how they will become tremendously powerful, positive, beautiful leaders.
We ask Allah subhanaw taala to help you and be pleased with you never to be displeased with Salah harana Bakery while he was a member of Rama Rabin was salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.