The Road To Marriage

Khalid Yasin

Channel: Khalid Yasin

Episode Notes

share this pageShare Page

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:27--> 00:00:31

My Church is seeing was a very they have a very good, okay.

00:00:32--> 00:00:34

It's been activated out for many years,

00:00:38--> 00:00:42

underlies punch shadow of 10,000 people today's call to

00:00:45--> 00:00:47

select from Hello

00:00:57--> 00:01:01

something a lot of people send them to me was having

00:01:06--> 00:01:07

to travel mobile cables

00:01:08--> 00:01:12

from blah blah blah I need to sell them for a short run load.

00:01:19--> 00:01:19

I

00:01:20--> 00:01:21

want to say that

00:01:29--> 00:01:39

the brothers and sisters in Islam, I want to attempt to address a topic that may be

00:01:42--> 00:01:47

unclear in the minds of many Muslims or if it is not unclear

00:01:48--> 00:01:51

in the minds of Muslims, it has become cluttered.

00:01:53--> 00:01:54

It has become

00:01:56--> 00:01:57

hazy, it has become

00:01:58--> 00:02:07

difficult. It has become an issue of confrontation at times, it has become an issue of despair.

00:02:09--> 00:02:18

And to highlight that point, I just like to bring you a statistic that perhaps some of you may not be aware of a statistic in your country that you need to know about.

00:02:19--> 00:02:23

It is stated in the most recent

00:02:24--> 00:02:32

national census, that there are approximately 1.8 million Muslims in the UK.

00:02:34--> 00:03:12

And according to a sociological statistic that has been given by different statistics, often I'm going to give you the middle statistic. At any given time, there are approximately 118,000 Muslim men and women who are under the age of marriage. And this statistic says most of those 118,000 will be single for at least six or seven years of their period of time that they are available.

00:03:16--> 00:03:26

Now, this is a very alarming statistic, especially when you take into consideration that the majority of that 118,000 are women.

00:03:29--> 00:03:30

Yes

00:03:32--> 00:03:38

78,000 to 83,000 of that 118,000 are women

00:03:39--> 00:03:55

who are under the age of marriage. And they will remain single for at least six or seven years. And in many cases 30% of them will be single for at least 14 years after they become available from the age of marriage.

00:03:57--> 00:04:02

So if you can look at this year, from a sociological point of view, just think about it for a moment.

00:04:03--> 00:04:10

Think about 118,000 young people between the ages of 15 and 30.

00:04:13--> 00:04:18

Who will be looking for a husband or wife or we'll be looking at each other.

00:04:19--> 00:04:26

Even if they are looking for a husband or wife. They're just looking because young people not old people look to but young people look for.

00:04:30--> 00:04:31

They're going to school together.

00:04:33--> 00:04:37

And universities and high schools in which there's no barriers like this.

00:04:38--> 00:04:59

Fortunately, the brothers went to this hall and they put this up in order to exemplify a reasonable amount of separation between men and women. But in most of the institutions that our children are your children won't be raised and from the time they go to grade school all the way until they get their PhD or whatever they go to get they will not be happy.

00:05:00--> 00:05:07

This separation. So they will be looking at each other. And they will be looking at kaphas. Also,

00:05:08--> 00:05:20

there's another issue. But let's stay with the statistic of the Muslims themselves before I go into the body of this, so that you will understand some of the reasons of the things that I have to say to you, you will use it the

00:05:22--> 00:05:26

you get the impact of some of the things I want to say to you this evening. And like

00:05:29--> 00:05:44

I said 82,000 of those 118,000 will be will be looking for marriage available for marriage at least six years before they find the prospect. So for women, it means they will be at least 21 years old.

00:05:47--> 00:05:50

Before they maybe look for a prospect.

00:05:52--> 00:06:04

And in many cases, they will not find a husband or get married until they are 2827 years of age. So between 50 and

00:06:05--> 00:06:11

82,000 Muslim women will be just dangling

00:06:15--> 00:06:17

the rest of the figure of men.

00:06:18--> 00:07:03

Now this men, I'm talking about young men who are between the ages of 15 and 30. But the situation is compounded because of that 1.8 million. There's another 362,362,000 men who also would like to get married, but they already got married, they go into another country, or they got a wife, and they're not satisfied with one another wife, or they are those who are between 15 and 30. And they looking for why but they haven't problems. Now you would ask yourself the problem. Question. If some 49,000 young men need wives, and they are looking,

00:07:04--> 00:07:06

feeling taken.

00:07:09--> 00:07:32

And there are 82,000 women that are available, this is not counting widows, this is not counting the sisters who may have been divorced. This is young sisters who are also looking unavailable, you would say but you'll figure that there are nearly 1.7 systems available for those 40 to 49,000 brothers.

00:07:35--> 00:07:46

Now, these are not our statistics, these are the statistics that have been taken by the government of which you must participate or you will finally you will go to jail. So they got the statistics.

00:07:48--> 00:07:53

So I'm quoting from some statistics and some of you may call them guesstimates. That's okay.

00:07:55--> 00:07:56

Now,

00:07:57--> 00:08:01

you will ask yourself, why does this problem exists.

00:08:04--> 00:08:06

I'm going to talk about some of those problems.

00:08:07--> 00:08:18

As I see it here. And as I see it in America, as I see it all over the world. There's some even more alarming problems in the Muslim world, but not like this. So don't be different. So let's talk about

00:08:20--> 00:08:22

I want to share with you another statistic

00:08:25--> 00:08:35

approximately 3716 Muslim girls will get pregnant by non Muslims every year.

00:08:38--> 00:08:58

And because of the facility that is given to them in this country, they can have an abortion and not tell their parents anything. They can have a lunchtime abortion, that is they go to school, go to the clinic, have an abortion, go back to school, or go back to work. Nobody knows anything except them and a lot.

00:09:00--> 00:09:05

And of course, the clinic for the clinic has gotten report when they do an abortion. So that's why they got the statistics.

00:09:12--> 00:09:14

another statistic I want to share with you

00:09:18--> 00:09:27

35% of the Muslim girls who are in school, and who know how to use a computer, they are talking on the phone

00:09:28--> 00:09:35

with boys, either by infrared or by SMS or by Bluetooth or what other kinds of tools they have.

00:09:38--> 00:09:53

They are sitting in classes, hallways and other places on buses and whatever. And they send a message back and forth. Why? Because the technology allows them to do that. And their mothers and fathers don't have a clue because most of the mothers and fathers just learned how to use telephones.

00:09:55--> 00:09:58

And the kids know it kids already know that mom and dad don't have a clue.

00:10:00--> 00:10:12

The other statistic I'm going to share with you is that many of our young brothers and sisters are meeting with each other around the world around the country,

00:10:13--> 00:10:18

on these chat rooms, and they're talking about everything, and

00:10:19--> 00:10:24

in the chat room, they're doing everything they can do, but touch, smell and taste each other.

00:10:26--> 00:10:33

Now, I might be a bit graphic, and you might as I move along and get a little bit irritated, but don't make doesn't make me any difference.

00:10:34--> 00:11:15

I'm going to give you the information, and you can do with information, what you want to do with information. My job as a sociologist, or my job, as a teacher, or my job as a brother, is to tell you, brothers and sisters, what the real deal is, before we go into the topic about the marriage, so you don't just think we're talking about something which is like abstract, something like religious, you know, something we just talking about. It's just like, you know, some is some kind of Nazi half, you know, something spiritual, that this is the real deal. And if you don't do something about it, your family center, that means the center and fabric of your family is going to collapse. It is

00:11:15--> 00:11:31

going to collapse. You will be cooking, wearing a jacket wearing cultural walking, talking, eating Muslims, but basically your ethics and your values as a family as a nation would have collapsed. Because you didn't follow the Sunnah.

00:11:33--> 00:11:42

Cause you didn't heed the advice of Allah tala. Because you put Islam in a prison.

00:11:44--> 00:12:02

And one of the scholars said, the problem with the Muslim world today, it is not the opposition of the capitalist or what they doing to us. The problem with the Muslim world today is that the Muslims have put Islam in a cultural prison

00:12:04--> 00:12:12

and locked it up. And Islam cannot get out. Because the Muslims got the control key to the cultural prison.

00:12:14--> 00:12:28

And with their culture, they are outside. Islam is on the inside. Not Can anyone see Islam? No, can anyone visit Islam is open the people benefit from Islam because it is inside the cultural prison.

00:12:29--> 00:12:43

And most of our problems, brothers and sisters, it is not George Bush, and it is not Tony Blair. This is an excuse. They are a punishment, which a lot put on us as a result of putting Islam in the cultural prison.

00:12:47--> 00:12:48

We need to know

00:12:49--> 00:12:57

now some of your young brothers and sisters who I talk with a lot most of the lectures I've given I've given 173 lectures in the last two years in the UK

00:13:00--> 00:13:14

20 2020 in the last 25 days, primarily in universities, colleges, six home schools at levels why because I like to relate to the young people because the old people is like hard rocks.

00:13:17--> 00:13:25

The old folks are too difficult to deal with unless I got 4050 people with me I don't want to deal with the old folks. The young people however

00:14:07--> 00:14:08

the topic just too hot.

00:14:28--> 00:14:32

Okay, if we are unable to do that, let me just see if I can.

00:14:35--> 00:14:36

So right now,

00:14:41--> 00:14:42

this will let

00:14:43--> 00:14:44

go from here.

00:14:47--> 00:14:52

So Islam has been locked up into a cultural prison.

00:14:53--> 00:14:54

We Muslims

00:14:56--> 00:14:59

as you see in the past, as Islam evolve

00:15:00--> 00:15:21

Islam came in contact with many cultures around the world, the Roman culture, the Persian culture, the African culture, the Indian culture, the European culture, the Chinese culture, but in that time, the icon of the Muslims, the model of the Muslims was deep.

00:15:22--> 00:15:42

And the knowledge was acquired. And their commitment was strong. And because the mind was deep, and their knowledge was wide, and their commitment was strong, when the Muslims into the Catholic countries, when the Muslims themselves came in contact with non Muslim culture,

00:15:44--> 00:15:44

they can't get

00:15:50--> 00:15:50

over there.

00:16:02--> 00:16:42

Can you hear now? Yeah, very good. So, in the early history, and for at least five of the years of the Islamic history, the mind of the Muslims was deep, and their knowledge was wide. And their commitment was strong. So when they came in contact with other cultures, even though those cultures had existed for some 2000 years, sometimes 1800 700. And when we get to China, almost 3000 years, what happened, Islam dominated the culture,

00:16:43--> 00:16:58

and the culture fit into his mom. And so Islam became the strainer. And the culture of the other people was poured through the spread of Islam. And what was inside left in a strainer was thrown out.

00:17:00--> 00:17:02

The hollow, the,

00:17:03--> 00:17:37

the foolishness from the people's culture was thrown out. But anything that was good in their culture, anything that synthesize anything that met with Islam, and agreed with Islam was kept and made better. And one of the beautiful things about this is that when the people saw the benefit of Islam, most of them accepted. They saw that when the Muslims came, in many cases, the Muslims only had confrontation with them just a few months, after a few months, and the people got saw the benefit

00:17:38--> 00:17:48

is better than what we had. And they accept it and they capitulated. This is what happened in many countries across the world, today it has reversed.

00:17:49--> 00:18:14

Now, today, when Muslims come in contact with other cultures, Muslims capitulate, that is Muslims assimilate, Muslim throw off Islam, they just keep their names because they can't get rid of that. They keep their food because they like the taste of that. They keep the language that allows them to communicate, but the mind is shallow.

00:18:15--> 00:18:17

Their knowledge is

00:18:19--> 00:18:46

very narrow, and their commitment to the deen is weak. So when the unbelievers resort see that when they see that our mind is not like that, and for those people that came in opposition, when when they see that our knowledge that they got better knowledge, they have better knowledge of Islam academically than we do. And when they realize our commitment is narrow,

00:18:47--> 00:18:59

narrow, we then they set into motion to re educate us. And they begin re educating us from childbirth.

00:19:00--> 00:19:04

They read educators. So here we are in a situation today.

00:19:05--> 00:19:17

Where Islam in the UK, for instance, most Muslims that are here in the UK are here, at least three summer summer here three or four generations now, three or four generations.

00:19:18--> 00:19:23

Those who were here first came here as workers and immigrants. You had

00:19:24--> 00:19:30

a commitment to work to survive, and to keep your Islamic identity. And you did

00:19:32--> 00:19:41

as well. I tell the young people don't get an attitude with these old people with those mosques. Don't get attitude with them because at least they built mosques.

00:19:42--> 00:19:43

If they don't,

00:19:45--> 00:19:57

if they don't want to do nothing but pray and close up the mosque, leave them alone. At least. I don't see no young people doing no mosque. Leave alone, cooperate with them, respect them because those are elders.

00:19:59--> 00:20:00

Brothers and sisters

00:20:00--> 00:20:17

What I want to say to you today is that, regarding this issue of marriage, among other things that we have to do as Muslims with this situation, we're gonna have to, we want to save our daughters. And if we want to save our young men, and if we want to save some of the older ones like me

00:20:19--> 00:20:23

from falling into situations that we don't even talk about,

00:20:26--> 00:20:29

we're going to have to go back to the Sunnah of the Prophet. So,

00:20:31--> 00:20:35

because the Sunnah, there is salvation.

00:20:37--> 00:20:43

When you bring back a softener, you will do a good job.

00:20:44--> 00:20:53

And when you nourish a good guy, you are suffering, killing and killing the good guy, I mean the sooner

00:20:55--> 00:21:09

so, when we practice a certain number, we will pick up the keys of the culture and open the prison door and this lamp will come out because then the camera will become loved by the Muslims.

00:21:11--> 00:21:15

Then the decision of the profits of long term have become loved by the Muslims.

00:21:16--> 00:21:20

Because of us upon Allah tala, he said in one of Quran,

00:21:22--> 00:21:27

Allah he heard someone say to the Prophet, so awesome. I love Allah.

00:21:28--> 00:21:33

You know, we all wish, if anybody asks the most lovable I would die for love.

00:21:34--> 00:21:35

I will die.

00:21:37--> 00:21:41

especially young ones. You want to go to Jihad you want to fight.

00:21:44--> 00:21:49

So Allah subhanho wa Taala. He heard that he said to Bill Elisa,

00:21:50--> 00:21:55

to tell the people say Mohammed savasana in June to headphone Allah.

00:21:58--> 00:22:16

Yeah, Eva como la, we have to look on Google, say over to the people who said that who said that up them up, if you really love the law, follow me. So that means loving a lot. And having a lot of love you is conditional upon following the Prophet. So

00:22:19--> 00:22:37

you can put a lot more x bar on the top of your mosques. You can put Muhammad Rasulullah on the other minerais you put it on your shirt, you can put it on your comecer you can put it on it on your hijab, on your forehead, you can put it everywhere, but that in no way means a lot of loves you.

00:22:39--> 00:22:48

The only way we can guarantee the love would love us and guide us and protect us and have mercy on us. If we follow the sooner the practice of law sooner, if we enact

00:22:51--> 00:22:55

if we can act, what the law is audits of loss of losses, why am I a

00:22:59--> 00:22:59

woman?

00:23:02--> 00:23:02

I'm Joe.

00:23:06--> 00:23:08

So take what the process was and give you a label on what

00:23:09--> 00:23:12

not to do. Take what again you do what he did.

00:23:14--> 00:23:28

Practice what he practiced, leave alone what he said not to do stay away from what he told you stay away from and what he didn't like and what he didn't advise for his own MK v whap. Take care. Leave him alone, select something else.

00:23:30--> 00:23:32

So last panel, Darla mentioned to us

00:23:33--> 00:23:37

some ads, which are frequently recited. He said

00:23:39--> 00:23:42

yeah, you walk

00:23:43--> 00:23:44

to Karachi.

00:23:48--> 00:23:55

We do this, but we don't listen. We but we don't listen. A lot says oh, you need to

00:23:56--> 00:23:57

be mindful of Allah.

00:24:00--> 00:24:02

Allah, the mindful of Allah

00:24:05--> 00:24:14

hochkar Ducati with the fear and havoc with the fear, which is is half

00:24:15--> 00:24:20

three and mindfulness which is the heart of a lot, what's the right and the manner in which you should do

00:24:24--> 00:24:26

not die, don't let that overtake you.

00:24:29--> 00:24:32

Except that you are Muslims. Now let's get some understanding.

00:24:34--> 00:24:35

Allah subhanaw taala

00:24:36--> 00:24:44

he has commanded death to visit each one of us at a time when we cannot know when it will come the death is not going to send me no email.

00:24:46--> 00:24:50

The agent of death is not going to knock on the door and tell me he'd be right back.

00:24:52--> 00:24:59

No announcements will come maybe you will get a better you'll get right yeah, maybe you'll get some kinds of dream. Maybe you'll get some

00:25:00--> 00:25:06

Allow them but no one knows when death will come to them so a lot is telling you and I

00:25:08--> 00:25:09

feel love

00:25:10--> 00:25:28

and don't allow death to overcome you while you're in a condition other than being Muslim Muslim is what following what a law state according to this lamb what is Islam and its value? Is this family law event or any well Indiana law it

00:25:30--> 00:25:33

means this this lab it means sufficient

00:25:34--> 00:25:44

for Allah according to the rules of toe Hey, let me get your act together well in Diablo and surrender to Him give up

00:25:46--> 00:25:54

what was it do do? What is it don't do don't do don't have no opinions about it don't have no but no one action however

00:25:56--> 00:25:56

when

00:25:58--> 00:26:02

it comes to his obedience, his commands

00:26:03--> 00:26:10

and then he goes on to say and to reject completely all kinds of cover

00:26:11--> 00:26:11

what

00:26:12--> 00:26:17

what has he Lee and all the branches and relatives.

00:26:19--> 00:26:21

This is what is defined by some of the scholars

00:26:22--> 00:26:22

to

00:26:23--> 00:26:30

accept that you are Muslim and being in surrender to Him is one of the definitions. Another is says Yes.

00:26:31--> 00:26:32

You are the NASA

00:26:36--> 00:26:36

era.

00:26:48--> 00:26:53

We always hear it because the prompts are so all of a sudden he always used to decided

00:26:54--> 00:26:57

this is a it says yeah you wouldn't.

00:26:59--> 00:27:52

Oh you human beings of mankind, fear your Lord, who created you? Can't you your Lord who is your sustainer who created you from one single soul. So Adam Elisa boomhauer came from one single soul at me from the same essence. So men and women they anatomy is different, and their roles are different and their psychology is different. But their creation was from one single soul, which means when a loss coming without a gave the order to the human beings about submission, he gave the order to both of them equally. And when he said that he will bring you out of the earth and judge you he said he will judge both of you equally, so that in the sight of a loss of male and female roles in the sight

00:27:52--> 00:27:52

of the law, they are what

00:27:54--> 00:27:58

equal equal does it means saying

00:28:00--> 00:28:03

they are equal, but not same.

00:28:04--> 00:28:11

They could be equal in weight, but not the same gold and silver could be equal in weight, but they're not the same.

00:28:14--> 00:28:23

And other gases could be equal in weight but not the same. So the male and the female Allah subhanho wa Taala made them Buck up.

00:28:24--> 00:28:26

And he said they are not the same.

00:28:27--> 00:28:42

But in the sight of Allah subhanho wa Taala when they do good deeds, or they they do bad deeds, Allah will judge them what the same. So he says, Who created Superman, single soul and then created from its main

00:28:43--> 00:29:00

thread and from that one single soul is made that means he created one soul and then split that one soul in half and created this meat because a lot he knew that if you created one, that one would be lonely. So he gave that one it's

00:29:01--> 00:29:09

so that they would be able to get another idea he goes on to say why he did that. So he says

00:29:10--> 00:29:30

so feel loved by whom you demand of each other, your rights of relationship and give reference to the wounds that for you life maybe your mother's hand is another person last comment Alice says to us was possible to recite. He says yeah

00:29:31--> 00:29:33

well kulu How

00:29:34--> 00:29:35

do

00:29:44--> 00:29:45

you get this beautiful

00:29:47--> 00:29:53

now I'm resigning This is because all of these as have key words to our subject tonight.

00:29:54--> 00:29:59

Oh you believe a lie. Be mindful of a lot.

00:30:00--> 00:30:02

Be apprehensive of the punishment of a wah

00:30:04--> 00:30:05

wah wah poodle.

00:30:06--> 00:30:10

And say words Salida

00:30:11--> 00:30:18

means straightforward, direct, honest, without deception.

00:30:20--> 00:30:25

If we are if we speak straightforward, honest, without deception to

00:30:27--> 00:30:43

deal with human beings, straightforward, honest without deception without a wedge without crookedness, not hiding anything with full disclosure, a loss of data says regardless of what your situation is, you're not going

00:30:46--> 00:30:51

to give you one he will make you will give you a slot. And he will also give you a much

00:30:53--> 00:31:04

better situation. Be honest, be straightforward, don't deceive. If you do the it might be more difficult at one time to be honest. Because there's a benefit waiting for you if you lie.

00:31:06--> 00:31:14

You see, you can cut corners and you can get something maybe you can get it before somebody else get it. But in the end, you will pay for it.

00:31:15--> 00:31:23

Allah subhana wa tada said, If you speak straight, and be honest, and do not be deceptive use,

00:31:24--> 00:31:30

law will make your actions sound and if something is wrong, he will reconcile it for you.

00:31:32--> 00:31:36

Besides that, he will forgive you for the mistakes that you have made.

00:31:38--> 00:31:47

Your philippou and he says, Whosoever obeys Allah and His messenger. So because of that obedience, what

00:31:49--> 00:31:51

faza 1000

00:31:53--> 00:31:53

have

00:31:54--> 00:32:09

a great, tremendous success, success in their marriage, success in their life, success in their business success, if they deem success and education, success, the moment of interaction with non Muslims success in everything because what first Hulu

00:32:11--> 00:32:12

is another voice.

00:32:13--> 00:32:15

What's it germane to our topic?

00:32:16--> 00:32:17

He said to us,

00:32:18--> 00:32:21

woman and among His Signs.

00:32:23--> 00:32:25

And Holla Holla. Come on fuschl

00:32:26--> 00:32:33

is that he created for you from your cells from your nuts,

00:32:34--> 00:32:35

as well as

00:32:36--> 00:32:47

the school he later that he created for you makes from yourselves, in order that you might dwell with them

00:32:49--> 00:32:50

in tranquility.

00:32:52--> 00:32:54

What jhala VEDA conemu What

00:32:57--> 00:33:04

has he placed between you, me, you and your mates? He placed between you know what the

00:33:06--> 00:33:08

what the means here from?

00:33:09--> 00:33:35

Allah is Allah dude. Know what the here means? A love which is greater than hub. The Hub is another word for love. But it's a different level of love, have more emotion involved, but what do what are what that means like a comprehensive, caring, loving, that takes in all conditions and situations. Because you know how a mother if you want to understand what

00:33:37--> 00:33:59

love his wife, the wife, she loved the husband when they get angry at each other how they throw things and curse at each other. And they even did break up. But nobody is different. A mother she doesn't break up with the child. Even though the child reducer doesn't obey her. The child does all kinds of things. The mother is bound to that child for life. Even when the father leaves mother loves the child.

00:34:00--> 00:34:20

Like the mother of Jeffrey Dahmer, Jeffrey Dahmer just the guy Yosemite killed 37 people and 868 killed 37 people come up, refrigerate them and piece by piece. He said that he got a revelation

00:34:21--> 00:34:27

that this is what he was supposed to do to demonstrate his commitment to God. Check that out.

00:34:31--> 00:34:36

Karma by some fundamental refrigerator rented the refrigeration place.

00:34:38--> 00:34:44

And one by one he began eating them and when they when they caught him he had already consumed.

00:34:47--> 00:34:48

When he was convicted,

00:34:49--> 00:34:59

put on trial. His mother was in the courtroom. And you know she broke down and cried and said please forgive my son. He didn't understand what he was doing.

00:35:04--> 00:35:36

He didn't understand what he was doing. He killed him. When he was cutting him up if he didn't understand, when he put them in, refrigerate them and put them in plastic bags and running that box. Maybe he didn't understand. But as he began eating them head to toe, why one by one, you told me he didn't understand what he was doing. He didn't understand. And he was acting methodically, he didn't act at random, like a crazy man just killed everybody all at one time. He didn't run. He acted methodically. And how long a period of time did he do this

00:35:37--> 00:35:40

period of three and a half years.

00:35:42--> 00:35:45

Straight, but the mother, she saw him as

00:35:47--> 00:35:49

her son, this is a

00:35:50--> 00:35:51

show the love of a mother

00:35:55--> 00:35:58

to Allah subhanho wa Taala, the judge didn't feel like

00:36:00--> 00:36:09

he got convicted. He went to jail and the prisoners in the jail. They didn't feel like the mother. Could they killed him, but it didn't mean.

00:36:11--> 00:36:13

So Allah subhanaw taala says to us,

00:36:17--> 00:36:24

that he created for us, mates from amongst ourselves, wives in particular.

00:36:26--> 00:36:28

In order that we may draw with them

00:36:30--> 00:36:39

in tranquility, and he placed between us meaning our hearts more than that is not only mobile, but also what mercy

00:36:40--> 00:36:42

feeling of compassion.

00:36:43--> 00:36:47

And this is certainly a losses were few that what what what

00:36:54--> 00:37:07

in this is a sign for those the convenience factor for those who have reflection in the sense. Now let me discuss with you straight forward my concerns about this topic.

00:37:08--> 00:37:18

And the service which we are offering here, the service that we're offering is just something that we feel is necessary, because you can't keep saying what's wrong, and not do something about it.

00:37:19--> 00:37:34

So we want to see what's wrong. But we also want to say this is one step is the best step. We think it's one step, and it will get better collaboration of other people, it will get better, but somebody has got to initiate

00:37:35--> 00:37:51

it's one step in the right direction. Others have also made some steps in that direction, and down the line, we're gonna work the kinks out, we're gonna see what other people get wrong, we're not gonna do that, we're gonna see what they did, right? We're gonna do that even better. But we got to take some steps. And I think

00:37:52--> 00:38:18

that when 10 2030 4050 different agencies set up a service to facilitate this year, we are going to be addressing this this situation, especially if we address it, according to the court. And this is going to be a way in which we can reduce some of these statistics. Now, the road to marriage, what is the roads about when we talk about nicad?

00:38:19--> 00:38:23

Talk about marriage, what do what are we talking about?

00:38:25--> 00:38:30

There's a beginning and an ending, or there's a beginning and there's a conclusion.

00:38:31--> 00:38:33

The prophet SAW Lawson says,

00:38:34--> 00:38:36

who have been near

00:38:37--> 00:38:53

every action shall be judged according to its intention. So therefore, just like any other action, the most important part of getting onto the road to marriage is the media. If you have the wrong media, you can wind up in the right place.

00:38:54--> 00:39:01

You got to have the right map. You got to know where you're going. And that's why Christopher Columbus was a fool.

00:39:03--> 00:39:07

He didn't know where he was going. He just wanted to go to India.

00:39:11--> 00:39:20

But those Jewish people who was who's living in Spain at the time, who had left with Muslims, they knew where he was going.

00:39:22--> 00:39:28

And they had the medicine but he didn't have the medicine. So they were drinking lemon juice and lime juice. So they didn't get rickets.

00:39:30--> 00:39:49

Christopher Columbus, they were looking at softball and they got rickets and lost their mind and the Jews took over the boat and took them where they wanted to go. Just the truth of the matter. I can give you documentation later on. But when Christopher Columbus got there, and kind of revived itself and woke up and found out he was on land

00:39:50--> 00:39:51

yahooeys had already

00:39:53--> 00:39:57

gone on this trip using him to do what they wanted to do. They had already done it.

00:39:59--> 00:39:59

They had already set up

00:40:00--> 00:40:07

The law places in order to sell they first and then start making coins and doing other kinds of stuff before them. Other stupid people got their

00:40:08--> 00:40:15

foot when Christopher Columbus and his guys when they woke up those of us dead, they said, We must be in India.

00:40:17--> 00:40:18

But where were they?

00:40:19--> 00:40:22

They were in a place which we call now America.

00:40:24--> 00:40:39

When they finally got a boat to go back to Spain, to see Queen Ferdinand, King Isabella and King Ferdinand, Queen of Spain and the King of France, they had put the crown jewels together. So let me tell you something now,

00:40:40--> 00:40:49

the king and the queen of two different countries have given him this process from that ship. So he had to tell him something and it was focused on India. So what did he tell him to get back? What do you think?

00:40:50--> 00:40:52

He told him, I discovered India.

00:40:54--> 00:40:59

And that's why today, the inhabitants the natives of the American continent is called what?

00:41:00--> 00:41:01

Indians?

00:41:03--> 00:41:37

Now, I'm saying you see this that if you and I don't have the correct Nia, and we don't have the right resources, and we don't have the right direction and guidance, we think that we're headed for marriage, and we wind up in some other situation, you cannot get on to him one, saying that you want to go to South Hampton, going north with a good meal, I might have just arrived in South Hampton. But I'm going north. If you go as far north as you can go, wherever you wind up on em one.

00:41:38--> 00:41:40

I don't know Edinburgh, Scotland somewhere up there.

00:41:42--> 00:42:09

So therefore, Nia is the first thing, the pure intention, you must have the intent to marry. And if you've got the intent to marry, you must know what it is to marry what your responsibility is. So parents need to sit with their parents or their children and talk to them about marriage. So the process allows them to see when your daughter's menstruating The first time you see the mystery, start and prepare them for marriage.

00:42:10--> 00:42:11

At that time,

00:42:15--> 00:42:26

they have their first menstrual cycle, take them out, married him. But he says begin the process of it right then that is what started talking to him about.

00:42:27--> 00:42:32

start preparing them for it. Because their hormones, their bodies,

00:42:34--> 00:43:10

that they will be prepared for it very soon. And your your sons when they reach the age of puberty, and the size of puberty in a man is different than it is in a woman. And that's why we see the signs a little bit later than women. The signs of a woman are definite. The signs and men sometimes they're not definite. That's why usually the puberty of men come two or three years later, because we don't see the definite signs of it. But a father knows when his son has entered puberty. If the mother doesn't know, the father knows

00:43:11--> 00:43:15

when the son is into puberty, because his body odor changes.

00:43:17--> 00:43:19

His voice starts to change.

00:43:21--> 00:43:33

And there are some signs early in the morning and late at night. That is true, he has arrived, that this is just graphic facts that you need to deal with. And the last lesson was keeping his companions about how to

00:43:35--> 00:43:36

how to do the job. He was

00:43:37--> 00:43:51

just he was going through the motions doing and like that. So one of the complaints or processes in front of him and he was about he covered his head and uncovered his head lifted his head up and said there is no shame when we speaking the truth.

00:43:53--> 00:44:11

So I'm speaking the truth to you. If you haven't talked to your son, about marriage, and he have arrived at puberty, he's gonna wind up going in a dark room of life and finding his own way. And if you don't talk to your daughters, they're going to try to find their own way.

00:44:13--> 00:44:40

They're going to become abused. They're going to stumble and fall and become bruised, okay, and they go to make some mistakes and some of the mistakes that they make is irreversible, because we didn't talk to them. Because it's up to them. Then put inside of them the desire, the feeling, the apprehension, the preparation, that eventually they're going to get married. Okay, that's what

00:44:41--> 00:44:50

the promise allows them. We need to ask this question Who, what, wait, how, who? Whoever has reached puberty, that's what we get married who else

00:44:51--> 00:44:59

from the time they reach puberty all the way into life. If they did not marry or they been married and divorced, and they want to get married again.

00:45:00--> 00:45:33

Everybody should be able to get married, our sister that has been divorced four or five times should be able to get another husband, if she wants, it might be a little difficult. But why shouldn't she be able to get another husband, she shouldn't be a man who has been married and divorced several times, whatever. And it didn't work for you, Allah will not punish you because of a marriage that failed, but He will punish you for any kind of relationship outside of marriage. So we should get married, save ourselves, if the marriage doesn't work,

00:45:34--> 00:45:40

which could happen, it might not work, you step outside, and you clean things up, and

00:45:43--> 00:45:53

then you head towards the role of marriage again, because for us, there's only one legitimate relationship between men and women. And that is what marriage

00:45:55--> 00:46:08

we don't have no platonic relationships. And Plato didn't have no platonic relationship. Plato was a homosexual, that's what you should know that. So if he had a platonic relationship with women, where he had no relationship with them, because it was a homosexual.

00:46:10--> 00:46:15

There's no platonic relationship to Islam. Brothers and sisters who kind of like just respect each other

00:46:17--> 00:46:35

intellectually, and they can walk around and talk around together, be together and all that and even live in the same pot together as partners, sharing the profit and all that and nothing happening, that's alive, something is happening. It always is happening, because the law created them in that way. Next, what

00:46:37--> 00:46:40

is it what is marriage, he said, marriages,

00:46:42--> 00:46:43

marriages,

00:46:45--> 00:46:54

and seek your fear of loss pawned off to the other half, marriage is half of the day. So when you have half of the day, then you feel a lot in order to accomplish the rest of it.

00:46:55--> 00:47:04

Half of them here means more than half in terms of mathematics, it means so much so that without it, you cannot complete the deal.

00:47:05--> 00:47:14

And only people who may be exempted from marriage is those people who got certain situations in their lives that prevented them from marriage, and a lot of investment.

00:47:15--> 00:47:16

Some of our

00:47:17--> 00:47:21

great ones, for some reason, they did not marry that human knowing.

00:47:25--> 00:47:25

Enough.

00:47:28--> 00:47:42

According to them, and according to the observation of others, they were so preoccupied, and they were so overburdened and overwhelmed with the task of disseminating and gathering and researching the knowledge that one of them said you don't know my wife,

00:47:43--> 00:47:45

my wife, it is the

00:47:47--> 00:47:47

lady

00:47:50--> 00:48:07

who should not be one of us should matter, because it is half of faith. And why? Because to marry what it does, it furthers the procreation of the human race, there is no way to further the human race except to matter. So those people who have those mommy mommy families,

00:48:08--> 00:48:11

and those daddy daddy families, you know what I'm talking about.

00:48:13--> 00:48:25

Men who marry men and women who married women, these people are going to frustrate undermine the human race, because they cannot procreate unless they find some ways

00:48:28--> 00:48:36

just to babies and other kinds of crazy stuff that they're gonna be doing to try to have their own nuclear, homosexual, lesbian families.

00:48:40--> 00:48:43

Allah saved us from those complications.

00:48:45--> 00:48:59

Hardly any Muslims in the Muslim world, it is said that only point 5% of all the Muslims in the world ever, ever, ever do that. And those who do it in the Muslim world, they do it undercover.

00:49:00--> 00:49:09

Because in most cases, if they do it outside, they won't live long. hamdulillah for the half of

00:49:11--> 00:49:22

our brothers and sisters, what is the issue now about when when should we marry a man that's the prophets A lot of you have lost a lot of sin. When should we marriage?

00:49:25--> 00:49:26

He said

00:49:28--> 00:49:28

quickly.

00:49:30--> 00:49:31

Without hesitation, this is correct.

00:49:34--> 00:49:48

The correct quickly, I mean without hesitation. Like if I asked you listen, I got some money for you. I collected this money for you. I made it I call you up I got this money for you. When do you get it? What would you say?

00:49:50--> 00:49:58

You want to hold on to it for 30 days. You want me to hold it for a year? Or do you want me to bring it to you right now you should not bring I'll come to you

00:50:01--> 00:50:36

If a man is thirsty, when does he want the water? right away? If you're hungry, when do you want it right away? If you're locked up in jail, when do you want to get out right away? So, if you marry the process of knowing human nature better than you and I, and the last panel to Allah, who is a male and Eileen who knows better than Mohammed some loss and who told him about why he Allah knows and law gave him wanting to tell us what, when they get married, right away. Without hesitation, that's a major jump in it

00:50:37--> 00:50:46

means make the preparations as soon as possible to protect yourself and to give yourself the benefits of this institution called

00:50:47--> 00:50:48

sewage.

00:50:51--> 00:50:59

It is why it is binding is a part of our DNA that we cannot afford to overlook.

00:51:01--> 00:51:07

Because it will spoil all the other aspects of the deen the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said,

00:51:09--> 00:51:13

I leave behind me no way to fitna for my own except what?

00:51:14--> 00:51:15

except what?

00:51:16--> 00:51:17

Women,

00:51:18--> 00:51:25

he wasn't blaming the woman. Some people will listen to this and think that they like he blaming the women. But I asked you this question

00:51:27--> 00:51:28

until 10 years ago

00:51:31--> 00:52:01

90% of all the pornography in the world 90% of all the public for waggish in the world 90% of all the advertisements using naked women and using women as a tools and whatever it is to prompt people to market people that lead people Australia 90% of all the places of the public, but they want to leave people Australian whatever they use women because Allah subhanaw taala gave them some something called Zilla 200

00:52:02--> 00:52:29

he didn't indicate again that to the men, he did a woman that's why a lot of gave them a uniform way. He knows this. He wants to cover a lot created them a lot of fashion them a lovely, beautiful, a lovely gym appealing a lot of medium glamorous, a lot of makeup, this and that. And so, so excited for the men to smell too similar to whatever to imagine. But he did not make the man the same

00:52:30--> 00:53:09

type of attraction as the woman. So he gave them a uniform change his daughter, Catherine, they start creating young boys to look like men, that men look like women. So now you're going to advertisements all over this country in America now. Now they're using young, effeminate looking boys, because they know that is men who themself love boys. And they will buy that product because you got a bad chested young boy with no beard and looking like a woman and got his hair curled up and so forth and so on. So you got men who love them. And you got women that love them, too. So now they're using boys to prostitute like men, because that's the society we in the COVID hook people.

00:53:12--> 00:53:14

Now, having said that,

00:53:16--> 00:53:18

it's this project want us to marry?

00:53:19--> 00:53:36

Because marriage will curb these tendencies. The Prophet told his companions is real. So Tyler law, he's the last messenger, someone else and received a revelation from a while, but he tells us everything from the grass to the sky.

00:53:38--> 00:53:43

So he said he wanted to see a woman that arouse you with desire. What do you say?

00:53:44--> 00:53:48

He said, Go to your wife, she got the same thing.

00:53:51--> 00:53:52

I was.

00:53:53--> 00:54:09

Secondly, a lot of women are different nature. A woman has the nature that if she feels the loss of power, she can live with one man and she can be loyal. And if she don't have a man, she also has the power to be loyal.

00:54:16--> 00:54:17

One of the words of the prophet SAW said

00:54:19--> 00:54:22

when the prophet SAW some passed away, how old was she?

00:54:23--> 00:54:31

18 years old, and she was beautiful and young. But Allah ninja is one of our mothers.

00:54:33--> 00:54:36

So she could not marry a Muslim don't marry the mother.

00:54:38--> 00:54:59

When he passed away, how old was she? I think 57 or 5568 50 years later, and the loss of our own heart and the other woman do not speak to anyone except behind a screen and she

00:55:00--> 00:55:06

went even further than that, when they knocked on our door asking her for some information that she had. She used to disguise her voice.

00:55:09--> 00:55:10

Look at that.

00:55:11--> 00:55:24

This goes, women have the nature to be loyal. A woman can wait, some of you brothers got wives in India, Pakistan, and other places and been there for 20 years, 17 years, you might go back and visit him a couple of years, or you might not even never go back. She's still married.

00:55:26--> 00:55:28

Women, some men do have

00:55:30--> 00:55:34

a man over here, we gotta wait for without a couple of years, he's looking and looking.

00:55:38--> 00:55:42

Got no longji I'm used to love his wife and kids, kids, but he can have something

00:55:46--> 00:56:22

different. This is why we have to get married. Marriage is binding. And everyone should be married a man who is married and got a son that's not married, you think you in the room with your wife, and you enjoying yourself and she has joined us up and you think your son don't know what's going on. You don't want to wait. Listen, brothers and sisters, if you got a son, that's 18 you don't have a job. He's not finished school, you don't have the money, but he wanted life. Let him get a wife and let him he got his own room, right? Get a wife and make a deal with a parents that either he go live with him.

00:56:24--> 00:56:25

Or he can live with you

00:56:26--> 00:56:31

and come and live with you. So he got his own room and he goes right in the room, you got your wife in the room.

00:56:34--> 00:56:40

They don't have problems because they're not mature, they don't have problems or they don't know what they supposed to be doing.

00:56:41--> 00:56:52

She's still in school, he still is a little crazy to argue. But at least they are home with you a home with his or her attempts. And they're married and they're safe.

00:56:54--> 00:57:00

And the family is what have been increased. So any problems that come up, you can deal with those problems inside.

00:57:01--> 00:57:18

To get apartment graduates in school, you will have to also graduate in four years, five years, six years, you got to get a partner you got to get a house, you got to all this cultural stuff, you got to get 20,000 pounds, you got to do this you got you got to get a car got furniture. But when you start thinking about all I said look holy.

00:57:23--> 00:57:36

See, marriage is fragile. We got to find a way to do it, and move this cultural stuff out of the way. Move it out of the way and get your sons and daughters marriage. Next.

00:57:37--> 00:57:43

The Prophet said about the prospect of marriage. He said What should we look like? Not for marriage.

00:57:45--> 00:57:50

Look for beauty, social status, character indeed.

00:57:51--> 00:57:52

The

00:57:54--> 00:57:54

three things

00:57:56--> 00:58:00

beauty, or the woman or the man is handsome.

00:58:02--> 00:58:07

See, social status, prestige, class, upbringing,

00:58:09--> 00:58:11

character or deed.

00:58:12--> 00:58:13

good character.

00:58:14--> 00:58:21

Means from the awareness of dealing religion, you've been trained well, okay.

00:58:22--> 00:58:24

The best one is

00:58:25--> 00:58:35

character. Why? Because when the beauty fades, and you can play by the way, my sister, she could be beautiful and get in a car accident. Finish.

00:58:36--> 00:58:38

What you're gonna do, you all messed up.

00:58:40--> 00:58:41

You won't be loyal.

00:58:42--> 00:58:43

But you know how she's looking.

00:58:44--> 00:58:46

say he's handsome,

00:58:48--> 00:58:49

nice looking brother.

00:58:50--> 00:59:02

But he has some kind of disease get messed up. He all wrinkled up, messed up, lost all his teeth hair fall out. used to love to be to care for her brother. But you don't really want to be with it.

00:59:03--> 00:59:27

That could fade. Plus they get home. You get Oh, she did all the things. You married. Somebody was social class brother. He graduated from Oxford. He's a barrister. He's an engineer. You know, he's a surgeon. You know, he's this. He's that. And he's apparently got good earning capital and good family support and so on. But that could change.

00:59:28--> 00:59:53

Just like that. So now what you got the same thing from high status. That could change what you're gonna do now. But if the person has good character, the character will increase. If the dean is good, the dean will become stronger and stronger as they get older, better and better. So the prop sauce didn't say married for what was the best reason to marry

00:59:54--> 00:59:57

for the now of course, you know, and I know

00:59:59--> 00:59:59

that beauty

01:00:00--> 01:00:04

Or handsomeness social status, or security

01:00:06--> 01:00:08

window, all of us who are looking for some of that to be there.

01:00:11--> 01:00:18

So what the process and how we go about it, he said go and see, they say that he said go and see

01:00:19--> 01:00:20

the blind,

01:00:23--> 01:00:32

the blind or less a different type of situation, meaning that the father and the mother of the of the man, and the father and mother of the girl, families already know each other,

01:00:33--> 01:00:34

the boy or girl,

01:00:36--> 01:00:42

or whatever it is, the mother already told the mother father already told the son, she is absolutely gorgeous.

01:00:44--> 01:00:48

The mother, one visitor, and so her sister has her daughters with him and

01:00:49--> 01:00:51

shook her hands.

01:00:52--> 01:00:55

embrace us and our little sister how you feel it. So yeah, we know, she

01:01:01--> 01:01:03

told us how you know how to do it.

01:01:05--> 01:01:10

She said, the mother and the mother and her daughter go and see the system. And then we don't

01:01:11--> 01:01:16

talk to some of the martial law that you know, embrace.

01:01:18--> 01:01:22

Whatever it is, they can see your teeth, they can see your abs, you got bad reps, you got

01:01:23--> 01:01:38

real truth, they can see she got bad toes, she got this, look around the house, they can see how they're supposed to cook some food that they're going where she sleep at. And they can see how she make the bed and the kitchen and all that when they come back. They basically got the deal.

01:01:39--> 01:01:41

Okay, and the same thing with the Father,

01:01:43--> 01:01:52

the father the other side, he comes in to sit down with the father of the boy and meet them and greet them and talk to him and look at him and everything and check things around and say look at Can I

01:01:54--> 01:02:02

you know, can I check this out, he's got good grades and look at him check look. So when they come back together, they talk to each other. They say no son, she's not the one.

01:02:04--> 01:02:07

And if your mother your sister both tell you and they know you.

01:02:08--> 01:02:09

She's not the one

01:02:10--> 01:02:17

you never saw. Chances are if you trust your mother and your sister your family, you could not pursue that situation.

01:02:19--> 01:02:40

And that's why it's statistic says, I'm gonna say this before I come to say something else about these cultural marriages. I'm gonna say something good. statistics say that the marriages that are arranged by the families, they last longer, and there is a better rate or lesser rate of divorce among the marriages that are arranged by the families.

01:02:43--> 01:02:46

This is not to support forced marriages. I'm not supporting that.

01:02:47--> 01:02:54

I'm just only saying that statistics say that the Father and the mothers and the parents, they usually know better.

01:03:02--> 01:03:05

Five, All right, we'll wrap it up. No problem.

01:03:06--> 01:03:36

So the process is to go and see and make sure that which prompts you to marry is genuine and real. Of course, the proceeds tell the man bossy, because he's mentioned that some women of Medina they got a defect in the eyes, right? Moving on, the dealer got a defect. And as he's just using that to show, go and see, to make sure that what you look at what you want is there. Next thing, that's the examination to review. Also, this should be the examination of the background of the character, check the people out. So that's why no woman was married without a worry.

01:03:39--> 01:03:47

She is she has a Wali as your mama who's a volleyball recognizer, she cannot be forced to marry unless she is

01:03:50--> 01:03:56

mature, and a father mother can marry. But when she becomes mature, she'll make that marriage shouldn't happen to know,

01:03:57--> 01:03:57

Islam.

01:04:00--> 01:04:11

There should be examination and review of both the girl and the boy to make sure that the backgrounds get checked out. So you're just putting people together and situations is not right, you have not been checked out. The next thing is engagement.

01:04:12--> 01:04:15

engagement in this lab is not the kind of engagement but

01:04:17--> 01:04:43

it's not where you've got his phone number, she got his phone number, let me call it jumping back and forth, sit on the phone two hours every night or they meet at a coffee shop and so on. So that's not the kind of engagement in Islam, but against that promise has been made. And the two people are intended to marry. And they have made commitments either themselves or they made commitments to the family, but they did not have the contract and they did not enter the ceremony. This engagement.

01:04:45--> 01:04:48

Not in some cases, engagement is allowed in a different way,

01:04:49--> 01:04:58

in a different way. And that kind of engagement is really marriages. But what isn't? It's when the two people come together. The dowry is transferred

01:04:59--> 01:04:59

the son

01:05:00--> 01:05:01

mony is done.

01:05:02--> 01:05:27

Now, the two people can be together, but it has been agreed upon by the man and the woman and the family, they will not consummate the marriage. So she finished school until he finished school on to some other things are done. Now, this is another way of engagement, which they are very, very, but they cannot have Nika that means they will not enjoy themselves until it has been agreed upon by other parties that that

01:05:28--> 01:05:41

I'll give you some considerations that you can look into your mishap or you can look to your scholars or you can look to yourself and you can see how these things work, then you can go check on some scholars and websites and see what I'm telling you is correct or not,

01:05:42--> 01:05:44

then there is the issue of the gallery.

01:05:45--> 01:06:00

And if there's anything that is the most important thing in America is the gallery. The gallery doesn't have to be stated. But it has to be there at the dollar is not there, then the private cost of woman is not lawful to you except through dowry.

01:06:04--> 01:06:05

You cannot marry without money,

01:06:06--> 01:06:07

you must

01:06:08--> 01:06:09

complete an IRA.

01:06:12--> 01:06:15

Of course the sister she has for not no longer wish to marry.

01:06:18--> 01:06:25

So maybe somewhere in between, I don't think too many of us will give somebody a flying ring or for it or for some date.

01:06:27--> 01:06:39

But we need to look at the situation and not make it difficult for the brothers and sisters get married by setting up these these excessive boundaries, which usually is set up because the father of the bride

01:06:41--> 01:06:42

he wants to share.

01:06:44--> 01:06:55

Now you can wait for your share. Or you can wait to put money or time on effort on your investment so far. There's nothing wrong with it. Tell a young man to give her 1000 pounds a year.

01:06:58--> 01:06:59

He's making 15,000 Yeah.

01:07:01--> 01:07:02

That's my money. You got no to do enough.

01:07:05--> 01:07:12

Anyway, give 1000 pounds a year that's 10,000 pounds. So she got but if you say give 10,000 in the front, could you want 5000

01:07:14--> 01:07:15

you make the difficult.

01:07:16--> 01:07:26

Secondly, the ceremony should be easy. But it's required for marriage. The very simple thing three things in this three

01:07:27--> 01:07:28

should have the marriage. What are the

01:07:31--> 01:07:32

first one?

01:07:33--> 01:07:35

First one is that dowry and

01:07:38--> 01:07:39

there should be witnesses.

01:07:41--> 01:07:42

Number three there should be

01:07:44--> 01:07:45

asking

01:07:46--> 01:07:49

the request and the acceptance.

01:07:51--> 01:07:57

Finally, after all that's been done, the proposal says that there is no marriage without enjoyment.

01:07:59--> 01:08:13

enjoyment. So two people get married for five years but there was no enjoyment. There is no marriage. So there's no convenient situation where people can come over here and say I'm on the mound with a green for green card yellow card I don't know kind of card they called over here.

01:08:15--> 01:08:28

You know man get married with a woman and he'll have no intention of getting married. He may not for convenience. There's no convenient marriages in Assam, the process often said there is no deception in the marriage and no joking about the marriage.

01:08:30--> 01:08:35

If you marry his marriage, you should have the intent for that. Brothers and sisters

01:08:37--> 01:09:11

want to come down and mention to you that there are some problems and challenges that we put in front of ourselves that we got to deal with regarding marriage. One of them is the uncontrolled knifes if you don't control your enough, you will ruin the situation before you even get into it. Lower your gaze gotcha modesty stay where you supposed to be at brothers. Don't be trying to get down assistance assistance. Don't be trying to get down with brothers. Stay where you're supposed to be at God yourselves ovale, bonobos messenger sauce and sister stay in uniform brothers, lower your gaze God's modesty and only going into situations in which you have the right to do it.

01:09:13--> 01:09:22

And be careful of these telephones and these computers. Because if you allow your daughter's to be talked to my brother, the problem is penetrating her ear.

01:09:25--> 01:09:39

That's what he's doing. He's changing her mind affecting her heart and things go into her body while he's talking about so they are having a conversation and through that conversation, one of the stages of Xena is taking place.

01:09:41--> 01:09:55

And one of the sisters on that computer talking in the chat rooms. They are also in a Kiowa. They are in a different type of halwa because they are talking with someone they don't even know or see. And it's a dangerous situation. They could be talking to a friend.

01:09:56--> 01:09:59

Somebody that that track her where she's at follow her and

01:10:00--> 01:10:17

Eva, she don't know who she's talking to, on the computer like that. The other thing is cultural complications. Brothers and sisters, modify the culture. Bring Islam out. Put the culture now, in your culture, article in Islamic culture is wrong.

01:10:19--> 01:10:27

forced marriage marriages is no delay, where the messenger of a loss of loss and allow are the companions aloud, read

01:10:28--> 01:10:33

aloud. Read Aloud forced marriages. This is from the culture

01:10:35--> 01:10:46

unjustified folder, system sisters who asked for cooler simply because they don't like what brother say. So now she want to go out the back door. I want to find out about the word for that.

01:10:50--> 01:10:58

deception and convenience brothers deceiving sisters, sisters deceiving brothers, as men marry women from convenience.

01:10:59--> 01:11:00

And people talk to you about

01:11:01--> 01:11:07

all of a sudden suddenly brothers and sisters brothers, suddenly, all of a sudden they want to know can we pray?

01:11:10--> 01:11:14

First of all mother was a permission was never marriage. It was a special permission

01:11:15--> 01:11:16

to hospital

01:11:18--> 01:11:20

and at the hospital, it was abrogated.

01:11:21--> 01:11:28

So it ain't no marriage because there was no divorce. There was no man so there's no marriage so it's not marriage.

01:11:31--> 01:11:49

But the only people who do it today claiming it is lawful is she I we don't share with them the effect nor with their Akita, all of a sudden, you don't want to pay the dowry. You don't want the responsibility. You want to pay the Nazca and you will leave the woman when you get ready as soon as there is no divorce. So all you really want to do is you just want to have a legal girlfriend at the center.

01:11:50--> 01:11:58

And they know right hand possess. They know wall so you ain't taking nobody has no sleeve. So you got no right don't know, I know.

01:12:01--> 01:12:10

You got a woman that's inside your house working for you. And you somehow told her that you possess you got nothing but a prostitute and you have nothing but a pimp.

01:12:14--> 01:12:39

Access to galleries is another problem and challenge. Creation and innovation inside the marriage is another challenge. we innovate when it comes to the role demands we innovate when we get married and innovation is another problem. Also, we disregard the sun from the near to the kneecap. We need to practice as soon as we all know what the sadhana is a last facade.

01:12:40--> 01:12:40

And

01:12:41--> 01:12:45

before you get married for yourself the thing for you print off anything

01:12:46--> 01:13:00

who's not just getting a man, they are the owner of the Quran and the Sunnah. Go and ask, what are the steps? What can we do what we cannot do and then after that Deacon obedience because he says, I feel I deal

01:13:02--> 01:13:02

with

01:13:03--> 01:13:09

those people with knowledge. And family members, non Muslims, we already know,

01:13:11--> 01:13:13

Catholics period last October.

01:13:16--> 01:13:17

He says,

01:13:18--> 01:13:39

a few different forms for the women don't send them back to the Catholics because they're not willing to the Catholics and the capitals are not lawful husbands for them. Absolutely. There's no doubt about this anywhere. There's no denial about it anywhere a Muslim sister cannot Kapha if she wouldn't, does that becomes a Kappa.

01:13:42--> 01:13:43

And that's what most of my

01:13:44--> 01:13:47

non Muslim sisters, he's talking about married Christians.

01:13:49--> 01:13:50

They are not the Adam keytab

01:13:53--> 01:13:53

they

01:13:54--> 01:14:01

call themselves Christians, but a lot made a condition when he mentioned that you can marry them. And that condition is that they have never been touched.

01:14:03--> 01:14:18

They never had to know power more. They never had no girlfriend. I mean, they never had no boyfriend. They who was married before they'd never had a sexual relationship before they have been killed and they have been chased now what are you gonna find knows that you got to go to the hospital have fun

01:14:21--> 01:14:22

with it.

01:14:26--> 01:14:38

So brothers, when you married is non Muslim women, you go wind up with a problem. Because in this country, don't children when they're born, they are British, and they belong to the mother.

01:14:39--> 01:14:52

And when you run out of money, or you run out of steam, or you run out of whatever else, you're gonna have a problem with your children and she takes them to the church, or she'll take them to the church, the grandparents on her side, to to to the church.

01:14:54--> 01:14:59

Now what you wind up with it, you want it with some children that don't even know the father or don't respect the father or they wind up

01:15:00--> 01:15:15

cross it in a church that went someplace else, and you messed up. You don't want to by yourself and lonely. So don't married these Kapha women with all these Muslim sisters as a fallible, take the log at which is allowed to be patient for women

01:15:16--> 01:15:27

unless they become Muslims, they may tell they become clean lawful for you, then no problem will you marry them, Muslims or children's Muslims Go right ahead.

01:15:30--> 01:15:36

Thank you very much for your patience and tolerance. And I want to respect the time I want to thank the brothers from the

01:15:37--> 01:15:45

Sam Bradford for their work in the field, the Dow for collaborating with the purpose of life center. I hope I didn't say anything too graphic,

01:15:47--> 01:16:32

annoying aggravating for you. Brothers and sisters. At this point, if you don't mind, we are handing out some envelopes do mannequins, I just say something with handing out some envelope to you, which is an ambulance that we give out every place we go to support the work of the purpose of life center, Supply Center handler, we have two licenses to broadcast, we are not going to broadcast on television right away. Because we have right now sky and sky is dangerous. So we don't want to broadcast on Sky plus sky wants to 26,018 26,000 a month. Obviously, we can't afford that right now. And we want to give you quality, we don't just want to broadcast anything. So what we decided to do

01:16:32--> 01:16:43

is shot longer. So we are going to webcast. So you will be able to get our programs webcast in 24 hours a day with good transmission, if you have what they call it

01:16:48--> 01:17:10

was the first a second or third level gigahertz broadband, whatever they call it. So if you have that broadband, you'll be able to get the purpose of life channel, and you'll be getting channel Islam, which is two channels that we have, you'll be able to get that very soon. How you can help us is by putting something random, because you will get the edge of whatever law gives us

01:17:11--> 01:17:23

whenever Shahada is given by us you will share it Mashallah any products or programs that you you will share it. The other thing we're not far from you, were right down the street.

01:17:26--> 01:17:33

coming to visit us. So you can see physically what we're doing. We're building our purpose of life village,

01:17:34--> 01:17:43

46, garden 26 penthouse apartments, two bedroom apartments right next to the center, we're building it, we're building a multipurpose

01:17:45--> 01:18:18

hall where if you want to rent something for 350 people in a very beautiful place on top of the hill, you'll be able to see that because we're going to build that in sha Allah. Now, if you don't know what it is, go to our website, I got TV. If you don't know what it is, we're open every single day, any day of the week, come and visit us. But take my word for it. Secondly, if you benefited at all from this, but we asked you to give something because once you give you will find it in front of the last panel. So having said that, if there's any questions at this time without answer, there's no time for

01:18:20--> 01:18:44

the brothers to remind you about the registration. Brothers and sisters, the registration another deal, we're sharing none of your daughter's information with nobody. We're not doing that. We're not asking them to give us their information. We're just saying name, address, phone number, email, whatever you've got, then we take that and we register you, when we register you That doesn't mean is activated that

01:18:46--> 01:19:22

you will not activate it. That means that we don't share the information, nothing like that, in order for you to become activated, then you've got to under supervision, you've got to then give us the detailed knowledge. For brothers. It means that give us all the information that you would want to know about a system and for assistance. provide us all information to your peers and nobody that you would want to know about a brother, then we assign along with the Father and what do we assign a supervisor, that supervisor might be an example Bradford, it might be in demand from Sheffield might be somebody from Manchester, but there will be four or five different supervisors. And so

01:19:24--> 01:19:45

nobody will ever share information. Nobody will ever get to meet anyone unless it goes through the processes through these evangelism classes. But the first step is if you're interested and you're looking for a wife, or you look for admin, we ask you today to register because you got to be in it to win it. You have

01:19:47--> 01:19:48

to be in it to

01:19:50--> 01:19:52

register otherwise we can't help you. You got to go

01:19:54--> 01:19:56

get the microphone to my colleague.

01:19:57--> 01:19:58

I want to thank the brothers

01:20:00--> 01:20:00

This

01:20:05--> 01:20:06

sounds like

01:20:08--> 01:20:08

a long

01:20:11--> 01:20:14

time in so much like to share first of all

01:20:15--> 01:20:19

I do hear the thoughts every time we do something. It's just the

01:20:22--> 01:20:24

I'd like to just thank the hostess Lamberth.

01:20:27--> 01:20:28

delay and performance. We have there.