Channel: Ismail Kamdar
This is part eleven of a Radio Series on Islamic Self Help Hadiths, based on the free eBook â10 Self Help Tips from 10 Authentic Hadithsâ â available here: http://payhip.com/b/RYyW
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Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh you listening to loving Islam on radio or then sir I'm your host is fine conda coming to you live from the Durban studio, it is 9:15pm and we are now moving on to our next theme and topic on living Islam as you continue looking at a variety of Hadees is related to personal development. And if you just listened to definitions by Maharaja Zane called Forgive me, definition it's all about mistakes that we make mistakes every day. And we repent every day. We ask Allah for forgiveness every day, and we hope for his forgiveness every day. And this ties in with today's theme, where we are now moving on to Hades number nine. In my book 10 self help
tips from 10 authentic Heidi says, again the book is available as a free download on my website Islamic self help.com you visit the website and you can download the book for free. We are discussing Heidi's number nine where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam stated that the believer is not bitten twice from the same snake hold a very short and very powerful statement by Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam. What does it mean? The believer is never bitten twice from the same snake hold. Before we look at what it actually means. You just the format of this Hadees is really amazing. When you look at the way that Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would speak, he
would say a lot in very few words. That he would say one short sentence that would require an entire hour or two hours or three hours of explanation. His words were concise, and they were deep. And because of this, his companions were able to very easily memorize what he had learned and conveyed to others. And even today, our children
are very easily able to memorize how Jesus to memorize the translations because
Because of how concise the style of speech of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam was.
And in fact, this is considered to be amongst his miracles that Allah has given him that he was able to speak in short, powerful sentences. And each sentence will be a topic on its own. And so when we look at this Hadees it's a very short list, it's only about four or five words in Arabic, with the Prophet sallallahu dimsum stated what translates into English as the believer is not bitten twice from the same snake hole. And amazingly, Hades is like this, you know, the way they are worded. They can be taken as proverbs and they have become proverbs in the Arab world, and in the Muslim world, as this is the power of the statement of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So what does this
mean to believers not put in twice from the same snake code, it means very simply put, the believer, a true believer does not make the same mistake twice.
That means that the real true believer learns from his or her mistakes. Look, everyone makes mistakes. There's no way around it, there's no way to avoid it. No matter how hard you try to be perfect, you will eventually make mistakes. In another Hadith, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam stated khulumani Adam kata, kata, hotter in
the province of a lot while he was Salaam stated in a authentic Hadees found in the movie, that every child of Adam makes mistakes. But the best of those who make mistakes are those who continuously repent.
It's very famous Hadees I'm sure you've heard it many times before. And the reason I mentioned the Gita is again, we all make mistakes.
But that doesn't mean we have to repeat our mistakes. You see in the field of personal development, mistakes are looked upon as learning experiences, learning experiences, meaning that in life,
the one way to learn something best is to learn from your mistakes. I mean, look at the idea of experience itself, what is experienced? What does the word experience mean? You know, when the young person goes in for a job interview, I remember this was my life. 10 years ago, you go into a job interview? And what did they tell you? Sorry, you don't have any experience? We can't hire you. Wow. You know, and you think to yourself, I just got my degree and you know, I'm qualified. And what do they mean by no experience? What does this mean?
Do you know what experiences experience means that you are really made your rookie mistakes that somebody else's company, and you learn from those mistakes, so now when they hire you, you're not going to make the same mistakes again. That's what they mean by experience. And that's why you know, those people who give youngsters a job, even though they don't have any experience, these people are really amazing. And really, if you're a young person, and someone's given you a job, even though you don't have experience, and being patient with your mistakes, understand they are doing you a huge favor, they are giving you an opportunity to gain experience, they are giving you an opportunity to
make mistakes and learn from it. So that in the future, when you go for job interviews, you have real life experience.
So experience is mistakes.
So this is something that you really have to think about in life, you are going to make mistakes. I know for many people, when they're young, they're terrified or making mistakes with the attorney right or making a mistake on the first day on the job. And they're terrified of of screwing things up and things going wrong and getting fired. And you know, sometimes your mistake can be huge. And these are things that really cause anxiety to young people. And you know, this is why I myself, am a faculty manager at the Islamic online university. And whenever we hire new faculty, always adjust them in our first meeting and tell them listen, you are new year, you are new to the job, you're
going to make mistakes. I understand. These are learning experiences. But I don't want to see you making the same mistake twice. As in a quote in this Heidi's the very same Hadees that we are discussing today, that the believer is not bitten twice from the same snake hole, meaning you are new year, you're gonna make a mistake. Understand that that's perfectly natural. It's perfectly human. But if you make that mistake, and we correct the mistake and we show you the right ways to do thing, and then you keep making the same mistake, that's no longer a mistake. That's no longer a mistake. It's now an inability to grow an inability to learn
inability to become better. And this is a problem.
Now, in our spiritual lives, we have the same thing. Many of us, we fall into sin, everybody at some point or the other in their life, they may fall into some kind of sin or the other big major or minor. Now, how you react to that sin, that is something that's really going to affect your life going forward. You see, making mistakes, is human, repenting from your mistakes, is Muslim.
Making mistakes, is human repenting from your mistakes, is Muslim. Every child of Adam makes mistakes, but the best are those who constantly repent. So you may be young, or you may be old. And you've done something recently that you shouldn't have done something that's displeasing to Allah, something that's a sin, repent, repent, and learn from your mistake, and try to become better. So, in today's episode, we are looking at mistakes and different ways in how we can deal with him.
And the lessons we're going to look at and the methods we're going to look at, they can apply equally to worldly mistakes, the kind of mistakes you make at work, or in your profession, or in your career or in your studies, as well as applying to the dean and the mistakes you make by falling into sins. Right? We're gonna look at how do you learn lessons from these? How do you turn this into something that you can
benefit from, that you can grow from and become a better person through, we're going to look primarily at five ways in which you can do that. If you want to follow along, in written format, I have an article on my website, Islamic self help.com is an article there called five ways to deal with your own mistakes. Right? This is an article that I wrote back in December 17 of December 2015, called five ways to deal with your own mistakes. If you click on an article and read it, those are the five points that we are going to discuss in today's episode. Let's start with understanding what is a mistake? And how should we approach and to understand this point, I'm going to
really discuss from one of my books, and that is the book best of creation and Islamic guide to self confidence, which is available at the uninstalled bookstore. In this book on page 109. I have a chapter called re thinking mistakes. It's a really important chapter. And it's something I wrote initially to myself, rethinking mistakes.
Because when I was younger, I was terrified of making mistakes. Now, I wouldn't write a book, because I was afraid of the mistakes in that book, I wouldn't deliver a lecture because I was afraid that I make mistakes in that lecture. You know, I would be afraid of getting a good job because I was afraid if I made mistakes, you know, end up losing a job. And 100 as I grew, I learned to to accept mistakes as part of being human. So in this book,
I started off by saying that
for many of us, the fear of making mistakes is what paralyzes us. It's what stops us from chasing our goals is what stops us from chasing our dreams is what stops us from becoming the best that we can be. And I'll go into a personal story that before writing this book,
I knew I wanted to write a book on this topic. But I literally would sit and stare at the screen
and not type a single letter.
Because I was afraid that the book would not be worth reading.
I was afraid that you will have too many typing mistakes.
Yes, this is what we call perfectionism. perfectionism is the idea that if I can't do it perfectly, why bother doing it at all.
And this stopped me for many years from accomplishing my goals. This stopped me for many years from getting ahead.
But hamdulillah last year,
I finally figured out how to overcome this. And since then, I published four books in two online courses, and started my own website called Islamic self help calm
all of this, because I overcame my fear of perfectionism and my fear of making mistakes. Today, someone may send me an email, saying they found a typing mistake in one of my books. I simply say thank you for informing me and I go ahead and I correct that mistake. Or they may tell me they found a typing error in one of my articles. I say thank you and I go ahead and write
Correct article, you see the mistakes is not a big deal anymore. Because I know I'm human. No matter how many times I edited, this is still going to be human errors, signs that this is written by a human being.
I mean, this is why the Quran is miraculous. It never needed a second edition. It never needed editing, he never needed correction. It was perfect from the beginning. And that's not humanly possible. As an author, I can tell you, it's not humanly possible to write a book without a single mistake. Any book that a person writes, is always a need for the second edition is always a need for editing, there's always a need for someone to come in and point out the mistakes and to correct it. The only book that never needed a second edition, the only book there was perfect from the time it was revealed, is the Quran. And that in of itself is proof that it is from the creator and not
written by the creation, because hadn't been written by the creation, you would have found it many mistakes.
So perfectionism, was an issue for me. So how did I overcome it?
I learned to read, think or reframe my mistakes. I stopped looking at them as failures. I stopped looking at them as personal faults. I started looking at them as learning opportunities. I started looking at them as life experience. I started looking at them as opportunities to gain wisdom. When I reframe them in this way, suddenly, mistakes weren't so scary anymore.
Mistakes were now a means for growth. A means for development, a means of becoming a better person.
So my brothers and sisters, as you listen to this, you too, may have goals. You may have things that you want to accomplish, but you scan. What if I make a mistake? I'm here to tell you, you will make mistakes. You will make mistakes because you are human. Every human makes mistakes. Just do your best. And look at these mistakes as your learning opportunities as your learning experiences. If you do this, you will find yourself growing from stage to stage.
With this we need to take a break. And when we return, we will discuss five ways to deal with your personal mistakes. Don't go away. We'll be right back after this break, the annoncer Foundation, dour tarbiyah and education establishing the foundations of Islamic civilization in South Africa.
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Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi rahmatullahi wa barakatuh you're listening to loving Islam on radio and sir I'm your host smile calm. And this week we are looking at mistakes. How do you deal with your own mistakes before we went for the break? We are talking about how we need to reframe our mistakes. We need to stop looking at them as failures and calamities and, you know, major things that you that that's going to be the end of the world. No. We need to start looking at them as learning
Unity's as life experience as opportunities to gain wisdom and become better people. Now the mistakes we make in life are of two types, those that are sins and those that are worldly mistakes. And the sins are also of two types, the major sins and the minuses. The major sins are those for which Allah has mentioned a specific punishment, like shirk, which is the greatest of all sins, to ascribe a partner with the Creator, Allah protect us from it, and other major sins like murder, stealing, fornication, adultery, drinking alcohol, these are the major sins. Then the other minor sense things which Allah has prohibited, but which are forgiven when you pray your Salah or gives
the car or go for O'Meara, or do any other good deed that wipes away since. These are things like listening to prohibited music, like looking at that which you're not supposed to look at the sins that people end up committing every day by mistake. These things are washed away by doing the obligations.
As the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam had stated in a parable, he told the Sahaba that if you have to go and bathe in the stream, five times a day, would there be any dirt left on you? The Sahaba replied, No, we will be very clean.
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said just like that, when you pray five times a day, all of your minor sins are washed away.
This is why the five daily prayers are so important. You know, for many of us, we've gotten backwards. Many of us think, you know, I committed a sin today. So how can I pre Salah I will allow the devil to trick us into thinking like this, this is what shaytan wants you to think. Because she knows that Salah would be a means of forgiveness for that sin that you committed. So really, as a Muslim, the way you should be thinking is I come into the center today, I need to pray my five Salah because that's going to be a means of forgiveness for myself.
This is Allah's mercy to us, Allah knows that we are human, he knows that we're not going to be perfect. So he has created ways every day for our minus sins to be forgiven and to be washed away. So we have the five daily stroller, we have fasting, we have the Ravi in the month of Ramadan, we have omura and even for the major sins we have Hajj. So Allah has created means for washing away our sins. So sins are the first type of mistake. And these are very specific. These are mistakes that violate the code that Allah has set for us to live by. These are things we have to take very seriously. Make us the far seek Allah's forgiveness on a daily basis, constantly repent, try and
become better Muslims. This is something we need to be doing every day, every day, we should try to be a better Muslim than we were the day before.
Beyond this, we have worldly mistakes as well. A mistake you made in your business, a mistake you made in your job or in your family relation. A mistake you made while studying with these kind of mistakes are worldly mistakes, they are not sense. I mean, if you're doing your job properly, and you honestly made a mistake, that's not a sin in Islam, it's counted as a worldly mistake something between you and your boss, it's not counted as a sin. It's the same if you're studying and you make mistakes, so you didn't pass the test. That's not counted as a sin. That's a worldly mistake. So we need to differentiate between the two worldly mistakes and sins. sins are more serious sins are
things that we should be taking more seriously. But here's the funny part. Many of us treat the sins very lightly. And we treat our worldly mistakes as if it's the end of the world. Think about it, how many of us end up committing major sins, and we don't even feel bad about it.
Right? But when we do one mistake at work that gets us in trouble with our boss, and we feel like life is over.
You'll just be means. That means that we think our relationship with our boss is more important in our relationship with our Creator,
than we think our boss has more authority than our Creator. That we think those things that our boss told us not to do. A more important than those things which are created told us not to do.
And that is not how a believer should think that is not how a believer should live his or her life. We must understand that worldly mistakes are less important than religious mistakes. Since sins are the bigger issue.
sins are the thing we should be striving
Every day to stay away from and when we fall into them, we should feel remorse, we should feel guilty and we should make mistakes. And we should ask Allah to forgive us. And we should try to be better.
When it comes to worldly mistakes, we should accept that we are human. And we should find a course a way to help us to turn that mistake into something beneficial into a learning experience. So how do you do that? Well, let's look at five steps to doing that. The first step
is to avoid negative self talk, what do I mean by this? Well just say you're working, and you've got a major mistake at work. And it's something you know, that could cause a lot of problems for other people. Well, the first thing you need to do is is calm down, right? You're going to have negative thoughts flowing through your mind, you know, you're going to be you're telling yourself, how can I be so stupid, and I'm not good enough for this job and what is wrong with me, you need to stop, need to stop thinking like that. And you've got to tell yourself, I'm not going to think negative, I'm going to think positive.
You have to do this first. Because if you don't do this, understand, we are human beings, we are emotional creatures. If we allow this negative emotion to take over us, then anything we're going to think or do after this is going to be framed negatively. So if you are now approaching your mistake with this negative mindset, you are now going to come with negative solutions or negative results. And that's going to make things even worse. So you need to firstly come down and tell yourself, I am a human, I made a mistake. Let's see how I can fix it, or at least what I can learn from it. You need to calm down and accept that you are human. And that mistakes are going to happen. You know,
and you know where I work, I have a really amazing boss, who I work for. And today, this actually happened, that I had to do something which I didn't want to do, I found it very difficult. And I was afraid I was going to really make a major mistake. So I asked my boss if he can step in and do it for me. And he replied, and he told me that yes, I can step in, I can do it for you. But I want to show you in the deep end, I want you to learn how to swim. And if you make a mistake, fine. This is a learning experience. It's not that big a deal. But you need to learn to do it yourself.
And so I had no choice, but to go ahead and do it myself. But I felt more confident knowing that even if I make a mistake, even if I do it wrong, even if if I really mess up, my boss is fine with it. Because he told me straight away that this is going to be a learning experience. And he expects me to make mistakes. So how do you learn, you know, working for someone like that has really helped me to gain a lot of experience over the past six years, where there is this room for mistakes and even encouragement, to grow and to and to do new things and to learn from the experiences. And this is the kind of culture we have in our workplace that when someone makes a mistake, we have a
meeting, and we discuss, what did we learn from it? And how can we make sure that we don't repeat that mistake ever again. And then we put in place systems to make sure that that mistake is never repeated again. And so the mistakes are not looked upon as a fault in the person, but as a means of improving the overall organization. And this is something that I'm mentioning, because I really want all Muslims and all listeners to really think about implementing this in your workplace in your homes and your families to approach mistakes in this way. That is part of life. It's a learning experience. It's fine. You know, as parents, this is the approach you need to have with your
children. Some parents have so much pressure on their children, the child gets a 95% on the exam. The Father's like, what happened to the other 5%. You know, I mean, you put so much pressure on that child that he can't even make a single mistake. Understand he's a human being. He's going to make mistakes. So instead of putting so much pressure that you might drive him to suicide or drugs or something like that, we have to protect us and protect all youth. Why not? Help him to grow? Why not help you take your son to your business place and give him something important to do and tell him listen, I want to see how you do this. Even if you make a mistake, it's fine. We'll discuss it and
learn from it together. Do you realize putting your children in those kinds of situations you'll give giving them life lessons, you're giving them learning experiences, you are helping them to grow in the right direction. On the other hand, if you show them to the sharks and tell them no mistakes, they're going to crack under the pressure. They're not going to be able to do it. Because they're not angels. The human mistakes come naturally to all humans, especially when we are in situations that we have no experience with
So my brothers and sisters when you make a mistake, the first thing you need to do is relax, relax, calm down, and tell yourself, I'm a human, I made a mistake. Let's see how to fix it, or at least what I can learn from it. If you relax and think positively, you will now be able to approach this mistake in a positive way. And inshallah you can turn this into a positive situation. So we need to take our second break now. When we return, we'll look at how to extract lessons from your mistakes. Don't go away. We'll be right back after this break.
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delay visit us at 133 SMD road over port or you can call us on ot 1209 double o five o audio stream all across the world via www.olixar.co.us that Mr. Li Kumar rahmatullahi wa barakatuh you listening to living Islam on Radio landstar I'm your host Ismail Khan coming to you live from the Durban studio. And today we are talking about mistakes, how to learn from them how to deal with them. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam stated that every son of Adam makes mistakes, but the best of those who makes mistakes are those who constantly repent. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam also stated that
the believer is not bitten twice from the same snake hole, meaning the believer does not repeat the same mistakes, meaning the believer learns the lesson from the mistake he made. And as a result, he protects himself or herself from making the same mistake over and over again. So before we went for the break, we're talking about how the mistakes are divided into me into sins and worldly mistakes. And we say that our worldly mistakes are less severe, that many people take them more seriously.
Very often we blow our mistakes out of proportion, and we dramatize them unnecessarily. This may be because we are raised with the idea that mistakes are unacceptable. And this idea causes a lot of stress in everything we do. Now, yes, something you may not have thought about the school system. The school system contributes to this mindset. From the time we start school, we are taught to stick to very strict rules and answer questions to have only one correct answer. This system drives out our passion for experimenting creativity and gaining unique experience. We grew up thinking there's always one answer to every question. We grew afraid of making mistakes, because in school mistakes,
not acceptable. And many of us carry the same mindset into our adult lives. Now I'm here to tell you that this is a flawed mindset. And this is a system which really doesn't work. It's teaching people the wrong values in life. Reality is, in this world. There are many situations where there isn't just one right answer. There are multiple answers that could be right. And the reality is that making mistakes is part of being human. It's part of growing is part of learning.
Other gaming experience. As we've already said, mistakes are unavoidable, we must accept them as part of life. What is important is that we change our perception of mistakes in our attitude towards them. The first thing we need to do, as we mentioned before the break is let go off the drama, relax, calm down, your mistakes are not the end of the world. Whatever you did, you can fix it, or very least you can learn from it.
I mean, history is full of examples of this, if you look at anyone in history, who's ever been successful in any area, they didn't get it right the first time, they made mistakes upon mistakes before they got it right. And what pushed them to just keep doing it no matter how many times they made mistakes, was the fact that they didn't look at it as mistakes. They looked at it as learning. They looked at it as experienced, they look at it as gaining wisdom. We look at Thomas Edison and the invention of the light bulb.
And he stated that Thomas Edison tried 2000 different materials to find out what would work as a light bulb, and none of the work 2000 imagine making the same mistake 2000 times rather making a similar mistake 2000 times. He's assistant complained to me and said, Our work is wasting our time. Our work is in vain. We haven't learned anything.
Thomas Edison very confidently replied, We have come a long way. And we have learned a lot. We have learned 2000 combinations that don't work when it comes to making light bulbs.
Look at this. Look at the way he approached situation. Many of us, we tried two, three or four times I will say, No, I'm wasting my time and we give up. The reason he was successful was because he didn't look at it like that. He looked at it as Okay, this doesn't work. I've learned something. I've learned that this doesn't work. Let me try something else. Okay, this also doesn't work. I've learned this doesn't work. So let me try something else. So every time he didn't work, he didn't look at it as a failure. He didn't look at it as a mistake. He looked at it as a learning opportunity. He looked at it as a lesson.
So this is something that we all can do.
Yes, you made a mistake. We all make mistakes. But understand that in work and in studies and in life mistakes, our lessons and learning experiences should treat your current mistake as just that.
Analyze your moves. Analyze your thoughts, analyze your emotions.
Ask yourself three questions. Number one, where did I go wrong?
where did I go wrong? Number two, what can I learn from it?
And number three, most importantly, what steps can I take to avoid making this mistake again in future, write down your answers will help you think clearer and remember it longer, and turn the situation into a life lesson. And some people you know, they go as far as to keep a mistake journal. They when they make a really major mistake. They open the journal, they write the date, they write exactly what went wrong, how it went wrong, what he learned from it, and what he can do in future to never make that mistake ever again. And people do this. I guarantee you, they're not gonna make the same mistake again. Why? Because they are now practicing this Hadees of not being bitten from the
same snake hole twice. They are now looking at an analyzing the mistake. And this is what many of us don't do. We make a mistake and we say, Oh, I made a mistake. Sorry. But we don't stop to think, how did I make a mistake? What did I do wrong? You know, how can I avoid it? And this is what you need to do. You need to ask yourself these questions. And you need to be honest with yourself about the answers, because that's the only way you're going to learn a lesson from it. And that's the only way you're going to avoid making the same mistake in future.
So again, three questions number one, where did I go wrong? Number two, what can I learn from it? Number three, what steps can I take to avoid making this mistake again, in future? So for example, you were working on a report for work, and you stayed up late at night working on the report. And when you woke up in the morning, you realize that you didn't save the file and the whole thing was deleted. major mistake. Okay, calm down. Ask yourself Where did I go wrong? I didn't save it. Okay, what can I learn from this? Oh, we saved my work and make sure autosave is enabled and it is saving automatically every few seconds. What steps can I do to avoid making this mistake again in future
number one, don't leave the report to last minute
Number two, make sure as soon as you start the document, you save it, and you enable, and your computer has autosave enabled so that this mistake doesn't happen ever again in the future. Simple as that.
This can be anything in life, you know, you've got an exam coming up and you forgot to study. Okay, where did I go wrong? I forgot to study. What can I learn from this to make sure I study in time and you advanced for the exam? What steps can I take to avoid making this mistake again, in future, I can start studying two weeks or one week before the exam, a few pages every day. There you go, you now have a concrete
system of learning from your mistakes, and you have taken your mistake and turned it into experience experience that's going to benefit you for the rest of your life. And this is what we're talking about mistakes don't have to be scary. Mistakes don't have to be the end of the world, they can be a part of making you a better person, they can be a part of helping you grow, they can be a part of helping to take you to the next level.
So this is one of the most important things that you can do when it comes to mistakes that you understand, where did I go wrong? What can I learn from it? And what steps can I take to avoid making the same mistake again in future. Another really important thing to do when it comes to your mistakes in life is to stay focused on your goals. And to find another way to accomplish your goal.
This is really important. You see,
when you have a goal,
most likely on the path to meeting that goal, you are going to make mistakes.
Now, the reason why many people don't accomplish their life goals is that when they make that first second or third mistake, they give up. They say I can't do this, I'm not good enough. No, I leave this to somebody else. So they allow that mistake to distract them from the goal.
Don't do this, don't allow your mistake to sidetrack you from your goal. Before you made that mistake, you were focused on something? Do you remember what it is?
If you do not have data, get back on track and find a way to accomplish that goal, which does not include that mistake.
So for example, you have a report you today,
you made the mistake of forgetting to save the file yesterday. What do you do now? Do you panic? Do you cry? Do you lose your head? Do you act like you're sick? No, stay focused on the goal. Your goal is to have the report ready today, you've got an hour left before you have to hand it in, you're sitting for an hour and you're doing nothing else but writing the report. And you're gonna make sure it's ready on time. Why? Because that is your goal. And you're not gonna allow your mistakes to distract you from meeting that goal. Right? You've got an exam coming up in two hours time and you forgot to study, okay, you made a mistake. You learn from your mistake, you're not going to do it
again. But guess what, you still have a goal to focus on. Your goal is to pass that exam, you have two hours left before the exam starts. Stay focused on your goal, stay focused on studies, and make sure you study well enough to accomplish that goal. Don't allow those two hours to go and think why me Why did I make that mistake? I'm so stupid. I'm like this and that. No, put those thoughts aside and just stay focused on the code. That's how you get things done. You stay focused on your goal. You go back to the example you gave of Thomas Edison, when one combination of making a light bulb didn't work. He didn't say okay, I'll give up nothing's working is No. My goal is to make a light
bulb. If this is not working, we mark it down as a lesson and we'll try something else. But he remained focused on that goal until it worked until it happened.
So stay focused on your goal and find a way to accomplish that goal, which does not include making the same mistake again. We need to take our final break now. When we return we will conclude on this topic about how to deal with your mistakes. audio stream Arkansas across the world via www.olixar.co dot email all your compliments or complaints to feedback at lm star.co dot set a are you finding it difficult to buy diapers for the sponsorship to the yedlin saw doctor Dr. Challenge? Well there's an easier way Yellin so now has a direct bank accounts account holders name alone sir Islamic Society bank Ned bank branch coastal and inland business unit branch code 164826 account number double
12687281 for reference diaper drive yet allowance are making a difference. Even Massoud schools for children with special educational needs at even Masoud school. Every special needs child is our bright new stuff, even muscle school for children with special educational needs. We nurture
Each special child's individual needs the only Islamic based elfin school that is affordable to you and beneficial to your special child. So don't delay further at 133 SMD wrote over port or you can call us on ot 1209 double o five o v on themselves Foundation, dolla tarbiyah, and education establishing the foundations of Islamic civilization in South Africa. Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. You listening to radio and SAR, and this is living Islam. I'm your host, Ishmael conda. As we come close to the conclusion of today's episode, we have about 10 minutes left to be talking about mistakes, how do you deal with your mistakes? Now many times we look at the
people who are successful in life. And we think, wow, these guys are so lucky. No, I make so many mistakes. That's why I can't be like them. But guess what, everybody you've ever met or seen we successful, they have mistakes. They have a lot of mistakes. But what made them successful, is that they just continued trying and trying harder and better and learning from their mistakes. We gave the example of Thomas Edison who stated that he tried over 2000 combinations before he finally found finally found something that works in making a light bulb. Another famous quotation on this is Michael Jordan. Right? The famous basketball player perhaps the greatest of all time, right? When it
comes to basketball. What did he say? Listen to this carefully. Many people say that Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all time. But how many mistakes Do you think he's made? Listen to this, Michael Jordan says, I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games 26 times I've been trusted to take the game winning shot, and I must. I failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed. Well, now if you think you failed a lot. Do you know how Michael Jordan got to be Michael Jordan? Because he failed 9000 times. But he kept trying? He just kept trying. He didn't say oh, I failed. That's it. I give up? No. He kept going. He
kept pushing through. He knew that every time he failed. This was a learning experience. This was a means of improvement. This is a chance to look back and say okay, what did I do wrong? And how can I not do it again next time. And because he kept doing that 1000s of times, he can 1000s of experiences that the others did not have and suddenly he was better than everybody else in his field because he learned from his mistakes. So a very brief recap of what we covered in today's episode.
We looked at the Hadith where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam stated that the believer is not budging from the same snake hold twice, which means that the Muslim the believer does not make the same mistake twice. The believer learns from his mistakes. He learns from his mistakes, and he learns from his experiences and as a result, he does not repeat his mistake twice. We said that our mistakes that we make in life have two types. They are sins and the worldly mistakes. sins are what we are supposed to take more seriously. worldly mistakes are what many of us end up taking more seriously. We said we need to turn this around. We need to take sins more seriously and treat
worldly mistakes as learning experiences. So when you commit a sin, repent, repent. If the mistake you made was something that displeases Allah a sin then seek His forgiveness. Find a way to avoid doing it in future and ask Allah to forgive you because he's most forgiving, Most Merciful and accepts all sincere repentance. He's a fudo Rahim. He's the web for fool the one who forgives any sin that you ask forgiveness for Allah and Allah in the Most Merciful and extra merciful to the believers and the web, the one who accepts sincere repentance these are the names of Allah and every name of Allah teaches us who Allah is. He teaches us the quality the attributes of Allah. And these
qualities the attributes of Allah should affect the way we live our lives. So if we know Allah is the one who accepts all sincere repentance, they we should be sincerely repenting from the mistakes that we make in this life, which are related to the deen.
So we said that when it comes to religious mistakes, we must repent and we must always be striving every day of our lives to become better Muslims. They you should be making less mistakes today than you made yesterday. They you should be committing lessons today, then you committed yesterday. If every day the amount of sins you are committing is decreasing.
Then you are getting closer to Allah with each passing day. And this is our goal. This is our intention to get closer to Allah with each passing day. So make sure that you do what you need to do to overcome your sins and to get closer to Allah subhanho wa Taala. Then we moved on. And in the remainder of the episode, we spoke today about dealing with our worldly mistakes, we say that our worldly mistakes are less severe, even though many of us take them more seriously. We tend to blow it out of proportion, we tend to dramatize it, we tend to think it's the end of the world. We said, when it comes to our worldly mistakes, you need to calm down, you need to avoid negative self talk,
you need to remind yourself I'm a human, I made the mistake instead of beating myself up about it. Let me learn from it. Let me grow from it. Let me improve from it. So you look at your mistake. And you ask yourself a few questions. So there are four things that you do when you make mistakes in order to turn them into learning experiences. Number one, is that you recognize and admit that you made a mistake. And for some reason, many people can't even do this. Now many people have this ego in them.
When you tell them that you are wrong. Do you say no I'm not wrong. Even though it's clear that they are wrong, they refuse to accept it. Because the knifes the ego, the pride, it's there. So let go of your pride. Humble yourself and embrace that you are a human being you made a mistake admitted. There's no way that you're going to learn from your mistake if you never even admit that you made a mistake. So number one, recognize that you made a mistake and admit that you made a mistake. Number two, analyze that mistake and ask yourself the important questions. Ask yourself, where did I go wrong? Ask yourself?
What can I learn from this? Ask yourself, what steps can I take to avoid making this mistake again in future? And I said it's even better if you write this down, you write down you write down the date you read write down what the mistake is, you write down what did you do wrong that led to the mistake you write down? What did you learn from that mistake, and you write down what steps can be taken to avoid making that mistake again in future, and you keep this somewhere where only you can see it. And this now becomes a learning experience. Number three, in order for us to benefit and grow from our mistakes and learn from our mistakes, we must avoid the blame game. blaming others for
your mistakes will not fix them. You are in control of yourself. And the most you can do is advise others, but you need to focus on what you can do to fix the situation. And so only recently I was dealing with this with one of my staff members that, you know, the person making a lot of mistakes. And anytime we brought the mistakes to their attention, they were blaming somebody else. And as a result, they're repeating the same mistake over and over again, because they're not learning from it. Not only are they not learning from me to not even admitting the mistake, and always finding somebody else to blame for it, instead. So this is,
you know, a major problem. And when somebody does this, you know, they're not gonna last long. In most workplaces in most jobs, not gonna be able to build a good career for themselves. Because people look at them as liabilities, people look at them as Oh, this person
doesn't accept their mistakes, they always have someone to blame. So you need to realize that you need to not blame anybody, you need to accept that it's your mistake, and then only you can analyze it. Number four, make sure that you draw lessons from it. lessons are not only learned from books and classes, the greatest teacher in your life is life itself, the greatest teacher in your life, or your experiences at your mistakes. Life can be your greatest teacher, if you're willing to humble yourself enough to learn from it. So this is how we deal with mistakes. Now, when you let go of your fear of making worldly mistakes, you now have confidence. The world is less scary. And as you go
through life, everything seems like a win win situation. And when I try something new, either I'm going to learn or I'm going to succeed. Either way, it's good for me. So why should I be afraid. And this helps you to get ahead with your studies. This helps you to get ahead with your work, embracing yourself, and embracing that this world is not perfect. This also not only helps you to get ahead in this world and accomplish your goals, but increases our desire to go to general, the one place where there's no mistakes, the one place where everything is perfect, because we know we never have that in this world. So gender is the one place where we can have that formula help us all to reach gender
and to get that and to be there and to experience that. So today, we spoke about mistakes, that when it comes to sins, we must repent we must try to be better we must, must ask Allah to forgive us. We must pray five times today because the five daily prayers
When played with sincerity and on time, they are a means of forgiveness for our daily sins are minuses. But when it comes to worldly mistakes, we must accept them, we must own them, we must understand them, we must analyze them, and we must learn from them. This becomes experienced this becomes growth. This helps us to reach the next level. This helps us to become better in whatever fields we are in, and it helps us to grow and become the leaders in our fields. So with this, we come to a conclusion for today's episode, I hope that you benefited from this discussion. Next week. We'll continue looking at other things which get in the way of our confidence. Until then duckula
heads is Malcolm the signing up for Salaam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh